


EPHEMERAL (BYUN BAEKHYUN)

by paigedarling0506



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Celebrity, F/M, Fluff, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2019-09-12 22:22:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 183,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16880349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paigedarling0506/pseuds/paigedarling0506
Summary: I saw a guy standing on the edge of the cliff. He was wearing a navy blue jacket, jeans and a pair of sneakers. What bothered me the most was the black bucket hat that covered half of his face.Little did I know, he was the famous Byun Baekhyun.





	1. One

One

 

~♥~ 

 

Three Twenty Five.

It was a perfect late summer afternoon.

I was leisurely riding my bike on the outskirts of the town admiring the trees that stood on either sides of the road serving as entrance to the woods. I closed my eyes as I pedal since the road was empty of other vehicles and due to my confident balancing skills. And while I did this, I felt the cool breeze brushing my face while the friendly wind made my hair dance along with it. I definitely love moments like this.  

I am at my mom's hometown and cannot help but fall in love with it. This was where she grew up and I had a lot of memories here as a child. However, when I turned fifteen, my father's job was relocated in Australia so our family, composed of my dad, mom and an older sister, moved there.

I resumed and finished my studies in Australia. I took up Interior Design and immediately landed a good job. However, after a couple of years, I decided to quit telling my parents that everything was a bit too fast for me. I didn't have enough time to even take a good, deep breath. I knew that if I didn't do this, I wouldn't have the chance to enjoy my life anymore. So I told my parents that I wanted to take a break and go back to Korea for the mean time. They didn't like the idea of course but I was able to save quite enough and made sure that I wouldn't even bother asking for help. Well, edit the drama out, they eventually allowed their youngest daughter.

So at twenty six, here I am in my favorite place in South Korea. It had been three months since I came back and I couldn't ask for anything else. Unlike the frenzy-filled cities, I love how it was so quiet down here and how less crowded the public places were. The people were quite approachable too. It's your typical Korean countryside.

I live with my Aunt Sunny and her husband, Uncle Jin Woo, with their sixteen year old, middle schooler daughter Jihye. She's sweet and into music. Aunt Sunny's my mom's younger sister. Uncle Jin Woo's a famous mechanic in town who ran his own shop while Aunt Sunny got to manage a flower shop called Areumdaun which was passed down to her by my grandmother. The flower shop had been here for about thirty five years. And being in a small town, the shop's quite famous around here.

I love flowers and I like helping my aunt out at the shop. However from time to time, like right now, I ask her permission to go to the old hiking place which was thirty five minutes away from the town centre. She was hesitant to allow me at first, afraid that I might get lost or something but I assured her that I would be careful all the time. She eventually gave in and allowed me.  

***

I stopped cycling when I saw the familiar trail on the right side of the isolated road. There was a small cleared area that served as the entrance to what it used to be. On the left side was an old signage with faded and unreadable letters that I didn't bother figuring out anymore.  

I climbed down my bike as I walked entering the forest. Since I was prepared for the hike, I just wore a comfortable loose white T shirt paired with jeans and a pair of black sneakers.

It was my fourth time coming here since I arrived. I remembered my mom taking me and my sister here for a hike when we were young. I actually thought I remembered everything perfectly, which was what I insisted to my aunt, but I was proven wrong when it took me about two hours and a half to get to the place the first time I got here. Of course, I blamed it to my direction challenged self which I intentionally hid from my aunt.  

The place changed a lot. The trails were not that neat anymore but they were still there. I needed them to be visible or else I'd get lost everytime.  

***

I followed the trails for about twenty minutes when my bike started to trouble me. Since the trails were a little bit uphill now, I decided to leave my bike where I normally leave it. I leaned it next to this particular tree.

"Wait for me here, okay?" I told my bike as I took my phone out; put my playlist and earphones on before I continued hiking.

I looked around and all I could see were the tall trees. Since it was late summer, the leaves would change soon and I couldn't wait for it. The mountain would definitely look perfect, dressed in autumn colors.

After about another twenty minutes, I could finally see my favorite spot from where I stood. I just needed to hike a little more to have access to its breath-taking view.

As expected, I was panting and catching my breath when I reached the top as I take in the familiar view that I came here for.

I was on top of the mountain. It was a flattened area that was surrounded by rock formations. The mountain was not that high just like the others but it was high enough that it would serve you a wonderful view of the town.

A few meters away from the edge was a big tree. It stood alone and majestic on the right side. It looked perfect to me actually. There were about four big rocks that should serve as seats scattered all over the place. And right next to my left was a giant rock formation.

I was about to step further when I suddenly noticed something different. Then I heard movements, which was odd because I am used to be all alone up here since not a lot of people knew or maybe had forgotten about this place already. I had this weird feeling that there was someone else here or could it be something else? I remained glued from where I was standing as I observed my surroundings.

I started to feel scared, imagining some grizzly bear ready to attack me when I finally saw someone emerged from the other part of the giant rock formation.

It was a man.

I watched him as he walked towards the edge of the mountain. I couldn't really see his face because of the distance between us but from where I stood, he appeared to be lean, he's tall but not too tall. I noticed that he was wearing a navy blue jacket, which I instantly didn't approve because it was still a little bit hot, blue jeans and sneakers. He also had a black bucket hat on so it was impossible for me to get a glance of his face.

I noticed that he stopped when he was about a few feet away from the edge before he started to step closer.

For some reasons, my heart started to beat faster as I watched the man step forward.

Then I gasped realizing what he was about to do.

"Oh god...no. Is he jumping?" I muttered rattling.

I saw him lift his hands sideways as he spread them as if he was indeed ready to jump.

No no no, I need to do something, I need to stop him. I can't witness someone's death like this. I told my already panicking self as I looked around trying to find something that could help but there was none.

There were small rocks but it would be so awkward if I threw rocks on him right?

I was so scared but I couldn't stand this sight so I shouted making sure that he would hear me.

"Hey!" I don't know how loud it was since I still had my earphones on. Then, I started to run towards him.

He must've heard me causing him to turn around and look my way. I was getting closer to him but I still couldn't really see his face because of the hat. When I was a few feet away from him, I noticed that he was trying to signal me to stop but I ignored it and continued to run to him.

Then with a blink of an eye, I almost had a mini heart attack when I saw his left foot step backward causing him to lose his balance.

Oh god, he's going to fall.

"Noooooo!" I yelled as I stretched my hand to reach for him.

Fortunately, I was able to grab him by the hand before I used every ounce of energy I had to pull him back up.

Maybe it was adrenaline rush or something that I was able to carry his whole weight by grabbing him back up but I realized it was too much when I dragged us both to the ground.

I was already anticipating my body to land on the ground if not for his fast reflex. He unexpectedly spun me around, so his body hit the ground first instead and I ended up landing on top of him.

My face instantly crashed on his neck, my forehead touching something soft, which I immediately assumed to be his lips. I could also feel my detached earphones between our bodies which also kind of hurt.

I still had my eyes closed when I heard him groan under me. That must've really hurt. I thought for a moment before the realization that I was on top of him hit me.  

My body jerked as I tried to get up when I accidentally hit him somewhere down his lower body causing him to hiss in pain.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it." I apologized as my face started to heat up realizing where I hit him.  

I bent my knees next to him not knowing what to do exactly aside from acknowledging my embarrassment.  

I saw his body curled as he suffered from my unintentional act.

"Are you trying to kill me?!" He asked, almost growling.

"No, I w-was trying to save you actually." I replied without really giving it much thought.

"Save me from what?!" He yelled as he suddenly sat up, his eyes piercing through mine.  

He was too close that we're suddenly face to face.

This time, his cap was taken off, so I had a full access to his face.

"OH MY GOD!" I gasped, my hand covering my mouth.

 

~♥~ 


	2. Two

Two

~♥~ 

 

"OH MY GOD!"

My hands flew to my mouth as I gasped upon seeing his face. I was so surprised because despite the rage written all over it, he looked very handsome and his disheveled hair was making it harder for me to look away.

It was probably because of my exaggerated reaction that caused the annoyance on his face instantly changing to panic. His body jerked as he turned around to retrieve his cap from the ground and hurriedly put it back on before tilting his head down.

I found that very weird. I suddenly sensed that he was trying to hide his face. Was it a mistake that I saw his face? I don't know but it somehow felt that way.

"A-are you okay?" I asked hesitantly.

He didn't answer totally ignoring me as he stood and made a few steps away from me.

I also stood while watching him carefully.

Why had he become so tensed suddenly? Was he that hurt because of our collision? I threw him a scrutinizing look as I search him from head to toe. My eyes stopped on his right hand. It was bleeding. He must have used it as support when he landed on the ground or it must've hit a stone or something sharp. I looked at the ground where we landed and saw several small, pointed rocks. I flinched imagining how much it hurt.

I got worried so I absent mindedly walked towards him but as soon as he saw me move, he made hasty steps backwards trying to avoid me.

"No." He said extending his left hand demanding me to stop. "Don't come near me."

My forehead creased as I try to understand his reaction. I just don't quite understand his behavior. He seemed...he's not scared though, I was sure.

"Your hand is bleeding, just let me see it." I told him pointing on his right hand.

He looked at it and it seemed like he just realized that he was hurt. He lifted his bleeding hand and checked it.

"I'm fine." He announced.

"No, you're not." I insisted as I watch his blood dripping on the ground. I don't know how deep the cut was but it was really bothering me.

I gazed at him though it was impossible for me to see his face because he was wearing the bucket hat again.

Was he perhaps a criminal? If he was, he would've done something bad already right? I debated in my head as I continued to look at him.

"I promise, I won't look at your face. Just...just let me see your hand." I cautiously told him.

He didn't show any signs of objections so I took the chance to come near him. I made hasty steps towards him. The moment I was standing right next to him, I was tempted to look up at his face but I used every ounce of energy I have to stop myself. I shouldn't do it if I wanted him to trust me.

I felt him twitched as I carefully reached for his injured hand. For some reasons, I was instantly distracted when I took a closer look at it. However, it was not because of the blood but because of his beautiful hands. I couldn't help but adore it. He has slender fingers with equally beautiful nails. His skin felt so smooth as well making me a little insecure of my own hands.

Then I heard him clear his throat and my private bubble exploded.

I shook my head as I came to my senses again feeling a little embarrassed. I focused on the wound. I was right, there was a cut. It was about two inches. I couldn't really say if it was deep or not. All I know was that it continued to bleed.

"It must have been one of the rocks." I told him making sure my eyes don't leave his hand since I promised that I won't look at him. "We need to stop the bleeding."

"It's not going to kill me." I heard him say as he harshly removed his hand from mine.

It was just then I noticed his voice. It wasn't so deep but it did sure have its own character. There was seriousness in his tone too. And before I could start gushing over the man's voice, I demanded myself to think of something I could do.

I ignored his statement as I opened my purse remembering that I had a small bottle of water and a handkerchief in it. I fished for them inside.

"I know it's not going to kill you but..." I paused. "Whatever." I added as I took his bleeding hand again. I felt him struggle as he tried to stop me.

"Will you just let me help you?" I said firmly. "Please." My tone didn't really sound like I was begging him. It was more of telling him to let me.

He didn't answer but I felt him relaxed so I took it as an agreement.

I felt him watching my every move so I made sure to do it right. I asked him to hold his hand steady as I poured water on his bleeding hand and just I expected, his hand jolted a little because of the contact of water to his wound. Right after clearing the blood, I folded my handkerchief and gently tied it around his hand.

"There, it'll stop the bleeding for now." I announced after making sure that it was tied securely.

I saw him lift his hand near his face probably to examine what I had done.

It was just then I noticed my handkerchief.  
I watched him stare at the light pink and flowery handkerchief tied on his hand.

He must think that it was too girly but that's all I had.

"You didn't have to do this." He said and his statement sounded really ungrateful that it somehow annoyed me.

"Yes." I snapped. "And I shouldn't have stopped you from jumping too right?" I couldn't help but be sarcastic.

"Who told you I was going to jump?" Though, I couldn't see his face clearly, I could imagine how his eyebrows furrow.

"I saw you."

"What did you see?" His tone was challenging me.

"I saw you preparing to jump." I answered making sure he'd feel the firmness of my words.

"No, you were the one jumping into conclusions." He replied emphasizing the words 'jumping' and 'conclusions'.

Then it hit me. Uncertainty suddenly hit me.

I suddenly felt my face heating upon realizing that maybe he didn't really plan on jumping. What if he was just really standing? Gah, how could I be so impulsive? If he was right, then everything was my fault. And to think that he did really lose his balance a while ago because I came rushing towards him made me feel more uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry." I muttered. "You're right, I shouldn't have assumed." I added as I turn away from him.

I faced the view trying to hide the embarrassment that was already written all over my face. I gazed at the community where I live. The houses looked so small from where I stood but I could still recognize the town centre where my aunt's flower shop was located.

I closed my eyes and filled my lungs with air because this was what I came here to do. To take in the view and relax.

"You know..." I heard him say, so I immediately opened my eyes and looked at him.

He was now standing a few feet away on my right, next to me with his eyes on the view.

"I was just doing the same thing before you almost killed me." He added though I couldn't hear any sarcasm in his tone now. It was just a plain statement, like he was just really telling me about it.

"I guess, I just didn't think of the possibility that someone might like this place the same way I do." I replied.

He looked my way and all I could see were the lower part of his nose and his lips. Basically only the parts of his face that weren't covered by his black bucket hat.

Maybe it was because the other parts of his face were hidden that I almost had my jaw dropped when I saw his lips form into a small smile.

"Me too." He said.

I didn't know how to respond to that but mostly because I was still speechless by how beautiful his smile was. What was happening to me? This guy seemed so mysterious and I am definitely drawn to it.

"Do you live there?" He asked, breaking my train of thoughts.

"Y-yeah..." I muttered. "You?"

He moved his head sideways.

"I have a feeling I shouldn't ask you a follow up question." I said unsurely and he might have found it funny because he let out of a soft laugh.

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from gaping at him again like what I had been doing almost the whole time.

We stood there for the next few minutes without talking to each other. However, I find myself secretly glancing at him a few times. And the more I think about it, the more I realize that there must be something about him.

Based on what he's wearing, it somehow gave me the feeling that he was trying to hide his identity. His voice, his aura, his stance and his beautiful face which I openly saw awhile go.

He must be someone famous. I concluded right after I dismissed the thought of him being a criminal. This man was way too good looking to be a criminal.

"Are you trying to figure me out?" He asked and it almost made me jump on my feet.

I found out that he turned to me and he must have seen me gawking all this time.

"Sorry, I was just...I just get this feeling that you're someone famous." I answered as I carefully watch his reaction. "And you might be wondering why I haven't recognized you yet after seeing your face. Well, that's because I left Korea after middle school and just came back recently." I added hoping that the unsolicited information from me would help.

He didn't respond but I could sense his uneasiness as he lifted his left hand to fix his hat before turning away.

My eyes fell on his injured hand and realized that if he was indeed famous, he could sue me for what happened a while ago. What did I get myself into? I couldn't be imprisoned three months after going back to Korea.

"Name." He muttered turning to me again. "What's your name?"

I hesitated for a while but realized that I am at fault. "Hae Won. Park Hae Won."

"Hae Won." I heard him say as if testing it on his mouth. He remained silent for a moment making me uncomfortable because I don't know what he was thinking.

"Hae Won?" He called.

"Yes?" I absent mindedly answered upon hearing my name.

I saw him nod. "Nothing. I was just making sure you weren't making up names."

"You're not going to sue me because of what happened to your hand, right?" I asked worriedly.

I saw his lips form into a lopsided smile before turning around to leave.

I followed him with my eyes while I remained standing on my spot. He was about a few steps away from me when I opened my mouth.

"So, I guess I'm not supposed to know who you are." I said.

He stopped on his feet and turned around to face me.

"I hope you don't." He replied, his lips giving away a subtle smile.

I didn't know how to react to that. I was speechless for a second as I watch him leave. When he was already out of sight, I inhaled and filled my lungs with air as I turned to the wondrous view in front of me.

That was weird. I thought.

A beautiful kind of weird. Actually.

~♥~ 


	3. Three

Three

~♥~ 

 

I immediately went inside my room and ran to sit in front of my desk where my laptop was. When I was asked to enter a keyword to start searching, I couldn't think of any. I don't know where to start but as I closed my eyes to try and remember his face, I started to type random words like "Korean actor" and "Korean idol". I went to look at the images but none of them resembled to the guy I met awhile ago. 

I drummed my fingers on my desk as I try to think of something else. I typed "Famous celebrities in Korea". I clicked on the images tab and started scrolling down hoping I would find a familiar face. I was doing the same thing for a few minutes when Aunt Sunny called me for dinner.

***

Aunt Sunny prepared a delicious dinner. My heart fluttered when I saw Samgyeopsal on the table because it was one of my favorite dishes. My cousin Ji Hye was already on the table with her plate full but her eyes were glued to her phone. My uncle usually went home late so he wouldn't be able to eat dinner with us tonight. 

I sat and ate with them on the dining table but my mind started to wander somewhere else. I tried to close my eyes making sure I still remembered his face. 

"Are you okay Hae Won?" My aunt's voice startled me. 

"Uh yes Auntie. Sorry, the food was so delicious, I needed to close my eyes for a moment. " I answered jokingly. 

She laughed at my remark. "You really like to eat just like your mom."

She was right, my mom and I like to eat very much. Since I was young, I never said no to any food. Well, minus the extremely exotic ones of course.

After a few minutes of munching and chewing, my cousin, who was seated next to me, shrieked. I almost choked that I had to immediately grab the glass of water in front of me.  

My aunt and I looked at her in surprise. She was holding her phone and seemed like she read or saw something that made her react that way. 

"What's wrong Ji Hye?" I asked her when I was able to finally swallow my food. 

"It's number one! He's number one!" She answered me causing me to be more confused. 

"Huh?" 

"Eonnie, it's my favorite singer! He topped the charts!" She sounded so happy. "Oh my gosh, this is so amazing. I have to tell my friends." She added as she started to type like crazy. 

I just looked at her not really knowing how to react exactly then to my aunt who was still eating and didn't really seem to care about her teenager's sudden outbreak. 

"You'll get used to her Hae Won." Auntie told me. 

I nodded in response. 

"You should listen to his songs Eonnie, he has the most beautiful voice, I swear. And he's also very handsome."

"What's his name?" I asked out of curiousity as I grabbed my phone, ready to search for her favorite singer.  

"By-" She stopped halfway before she started yelling. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! He's on TV! Mom, please let me watch his performance. I promise I'll do my homework right after." She begged breathlessly.  

I looked at my aunt's reaction and for a moment there she seemed to disagree with her.  

"Please. Please. Please Mom." Ji hye begged once more. "I swear, I will study very hard after the show."

"Okay but-" My aunt was not even finished talking yet when Ji Hye sprinted out of the dining room to the living room. 

I laughed at them because Ji Hye moved really fast. In fact, the house wasn't that big so, in just a matter of seconds, Ji Hye was already in front of the TV. 

"Sometimes, I wonder where she gets her energy when it comes to her favorite celebrities. I just hope she has the same energy when it comes to studying." I heard my aunt say. 

"She's very cute Auntie." I commented smiling while I watched Ji Hye panic in the living room. 

"Oh my gosh!!! He's going to sing his new song!!!" Ji Hye screamed like crazy.

"She must like him very much." I muttered.

"Well, that singer's really good." Auntie said as she stood to gather the dishes on the table. "I like him too." She smiled at me. "But never tell Ji Hye about this, okay?" 

I chuckled at my aunt's revelation. 

"Well lucky you Auntie, I am good at keeping secrets." I replied and we both laughed. 

I also stood since I was finished eating too. I offered to wash the dishes but she didn't let me. 

"Why don't you go watch with Ji Hye. Please look after her, I'm scared she might faint anytime." 

I nodded laughing.  

I went to the living room and as I got closer I could hear someone from the TV. It was a man's voice and I stopped on my feet when it sounded a little familiar. 

"Eonnie!!" I heard Ji Hye called as she signalled me to come near her. "He's about to sing."

I walked and stood right next to her.

"Are you sure I'm going to like him?" I asked Ji Hye trying to tease her. 

"100%! Baekhyun is Perfect!" She replied enthusiastically.

I smiled at her before darting my eyes on the TV. 

I first saw the pretty host on the screen before it was focused on the guest. Right at that exact moment, I found myself swallowing hard when I finally saw the singer Ji Hye was talking about. 

Right at the same time, I had a flashback of what happened this afternoon. Especially the part where I saw his bare face.

I could see the exact same face on TV. His black hair was down covering some parts of his eyes. He was wearing a white button down long sleeved top, black pants and white sneakers. He was seated on the couch in front of a beautiful female host.

"Baekhyun, would you please sing a song for us?" The host asked. 

He smiled and nodded at her before standing up and headed to the other part of the set. There was a big, black piano and he sat in front of it.

I held my breath realizing that he was going to play the piano.  

"Oh my gosh Eonnie! He's going to play the piano!!" Ji Hye shrieked once more but I didn't really have the chance to reply anymore when he started to play.

My heart hammered the moment he started to sing. Ji Hye was right. He has a very good voice. He had a very beautiful voice color. He was singing a love song and his facial expressions caught me speechless. It sounded so emotional. 

"Eonnie, I'm going to cry! He's really handsome!!"

Ji Hye was right. He was handsome. 

I can't believe what I am seeing. He was really the same guy. It was him up there. And as I dwell on that thought that I almost killed him, it made my stomach churn. 

And as if what I was seeing wasn't enough yet, the camera zoomed in on his pretty hands as they played with the piano keys, reminding me of what happened to his hand.  

"Oh my!" I gasped, a hand covering my mouth causing my cousin to look at me. 

"I told you Eonnie, he's really good! He's good right? Right?!"

I nodded in response.

When his performance ended, Ji Hye clapped her hands so hard. Mine, on the other hand went stiff, my knees somehow weakened so I slowly sat on the sofa right behind us. 

The remaining part of the show was purely him answering questions about his new album and possible tours in the future.

I noticed that he has a bright personality. He kept on smiling. His speaking voice was really good too. He seemed to know what he was doing. The way he answered each question thrown at him and the way he communicates with the viewers. He also made a few jokes which made the host and the live audience laugh. I would have laughed too if I wasn't so tensed. 

The show ended and I still kept on thinking of a reason why he was up there. What was someone as famous as him doing in this town?

"What's his name again?" I asked.  

"Baekhyun." Ji Hye replied immediately. "Byun Baekhyun."

"Byun Baekhyun." I let his name roll on my tongue for the first time. "Is he really famous?"

"Very very very famous. He's Korea's top male singer. He has so many songs and collaborations and all of them always hit the top spot. He has won many awards and he's not just famous here in Korea but also in other countries."

"Really?" 

Ji hye nodded. 

"My dream is to attend his concert. My mom won't let me so I told myself after I graduate High School, I will look for a part time job to earn money for my concert ticket." She said eagerly. 

"Have...have you ever seen him in person?" I asked her again.

"No." She pouted. "He must be very handsome in person." 

"Yes, very." I replied as I recalled his handsome face this afternoon, totally unaware that I was thinking out loud.

"What?! Eonnie! You haven't seen him in person right? Did he perhaps have a concert in Australia?"

"Ah, no no no, I haven't seen him yet." I denied. "I haven't heard of him when I was in Australia too."

"Ahhh." Ji Hye muttered. "That's right. Anyway eonnie, you should give his songs a listen. You will surely love his voice-"

Ji Hye's sentence was cut when Auntie appeared in the living room, telling her to start doing her homework. I saw how my cousin's shoulders slumped as she stood to go to her room. 

"Are you going to continue watching the TV Hae won?" Auntie asked. 

"No Auntie, I'm going to my room now. Have a good night." I told her before leaving. 

 

***

BYUN BAEKHYUN

I typed and after a few seconds, I was bombarded with his images. I couldn't help but be amazed by his visuals. He has tried several hair colors before like all shades of brown, red, silver and blonde. He all looked good in those hair colors but I had come to agree that black was his best hair color. He had the most beautiful brown eyes which automatically turned into crescent when he smiles. His eyesmiles were one of the most beautiful ones I have seen. He has a button nose and a pair of incredibly thin lips. His smile---this person even has the most beautiful teeth. Was he for real? 

Yes, he was real. I even saw him. I told myself. 

I clicked on his information. 

BYUN BAEKHYUN 

SINGER 

South Korea

MAY 06 1992, 27 years old. 

 

Below was a list of his songs and projects. 

I watched some of his music videos that night. 

Actually, maybe I watched a little too much that I decided to stop at 2AM. 

 

***

I was lying on my bed facing the ceiling. 

Should I consider myself lucky for a real life encounter with Byun Baekhyun? Was that a good thing? I didn't really know but there was one thing I am sure of, I should not tell anyone about this. 

"I just really hope he doesn't sue me." 

I heard myself saying before I closed my tired eyes and let myself sleep that night.

~♥~ 


	4. Four

Four

 

~♥~ 

 

It had almost been a month since that fateful day I saw the guy who turned out to be The Byun Baekhyun of Korea. 

I went back to the mountain the very next day. I didn't know why I did it but I was hoping to see him again. Though I knew that there was a big possibility that he might not show up again because he wouldn't be that careless after bumping into a stranger.

Just as I had expected, I never saw him up there again. I still continued to hike anyway, telling myself that he was not the main reason I did it. Which was mostly true. It was my healing place even before he showed up.  

The truth was, I started to like his music. The way his voice sounded like honey whenever he sang love songs. The way it gave a little tug in my heart when he sang a sad ballad song. So, before I knew it, almost half of my playlist was already filled with his songs.

 

***

It was a late Saturday afternoon when I decided to climb up the old hiking place again. I really thought it was a good idea to come here a little later to avoid the scorching sun. It was almost Autumn but it was still hot which was starting to be annoying. That, and the thought that my bike chain broke made me think otherwise.  

I felt like a fool not being able to check it before coming here. It broke down fifteen minutes away from the entrance of the hiking place so I was forced to walk from there.  

When I finally reached the entrance, I leaned it next to the signage. I bent my knees to examine it. To be honest, I don't really know what to do with it. It was the first time it happened to me. Before I touched anything, I fished for my hair tie inside my bag and made a messy ponytail. 

Then I started to do what I thought was the right thing. It appeared that the chain got detached from the crankset so I tried my best to concentrate to fix it. I saw a stick on the ground right next to me. Since, it looked quite useful, I grabbed it. 

It looked easy to be honest but my first attempt failed. The second one was not any different. Then the third failed attempt followed. 

I huffed the loose strands of my hair falling on my face out of frustration. 

"Will you cooperate, please?" I pleaded not really knowing if it was for the bike or for my inexperienced self. "I need you to go home."

I was about to make my fourth attempt when I heard something. It sounded like a car coming to my direction. It totally freaked me out so I stopped what I was doing immediately. 

Knowing that not a lot of people knew about this place anymore, I didn't waste any time. I stood and looked for a place to hide.

I hid right behind the bushes. Since, I was a little bit tall, I needed to make sure my head wouldn't give me away so I crouched as low as I could. 

Then I watched as a sleek black car stopped right next to my bike. I was looking at it while my mind was already busy thinking of a way for me to escape as I imagined a goon coming out of the car. I saw a rock a foot away from me, I stretched my arm and grabbed it. At least, I had something to defend myself. 

"Don't let me die, please don't let me die." I chanted silently as I slouched more, pressing my eyes closed.

I heard the car's door opened and was closed after a few seconds. Then there were footsteps leaving the dried leaves crushed under the person's feet. 

I was fighting my curiosity convincing myself not to take a peek but I had always been a curious cat so I slowly lifted my head to check.

Then I almost poked my face with the stick, which I was still holding, out of surprise when I recognized who the newcomer was. 

 

It was him. 

It was Baekhyun. 

 

He was wearing a navy blue cap, black round specs, and a loose plain grey shirt paired with pants and sneakers. 

I was still staring at him in disbelief when I saw him roam his attention around, probably looking for the owner of the broken bike. I ducked not really knowing why I had to do it.

Next moment, my eyes were on the ground and I instantly saw a crawling bug next to my feet. I hate bugs and they made me feel so uncomfortable so I got so scared.  I shrieked and jumped away from where I was hiding, obviously revealing myself in the open. 

I was panting, my hand (with the stick) on my chest trying to calm myself due to the sight of the bug.

I was busy trying to compose myself completely  forgetting that I am not alone anymore. 

I bent a little, my hands landed on my knees. 

"Oh I... hate... bugs." I said in between my heavy breathing. 

After a few moments, I looked up and it was just then I saw him. I straightened my posture as I slowly glanced at him.

He was looking at me, shock written all over his face too. He probably recognized me after a brief moment because his face relaxed a little bit. 

"Hey." He greeted.

"Hi." I replied nervously. 

I was almost two meters away from him and I didn't really know whether to come closer or give him more space. He was a celebrity after all. It even felt wrong to gape at him right now.  

"You're not going to hit me with that stone, are you?" He wondered as he pointed to the stone I was holding. 

"Uh, no." I replied as I immediately dropped the stone. 

I saw his lips curved into a small smile. 

"What were you doing behind the bushes?" He asked once more.

"Well, I was trying to fix my bike when I heard a car approaching. I got a little scared so I hid." I answered. 

He chuckled, obviously laughing at me. 

"But I realized that it was a bad idea when a crawling bug decided to keep me company." I explained trying to sound rational as I could.

"What were you so scared of?" He asked followed by a lopsided smile. "Aside from the bug, I mean."

"Well, people don't usually come up here anymore. So, I was just being careful." I told him. "If you know what I mean."

He nodded as he shoved his both hands inside his jeans' pockets.

"Your bike's broken?" I heard him asked. 

It was my turn to nod. 

"Let me take a look." 

I saw him bent his knees in front of my bike so I immediately ran and stopped beside him. 

"No!" I protested bending my knees next to him. 

"No, please. It's okay, I can fix it." I insisted thinking how huge of a celebrity he was. I shouldn't let him fix my stupid bike. 

He threw a puzzled look at me. 

"Okay." He agreed signalling me to go ahead and fix it.

I hesitated for a while before I tried to make my fourth attempt. I knew he had his eyes on me while I was trying to work on my bike and it was making me a hundred times conscious and uncomfortable.

I was already trying to do my best with the bike chain when I heard him spoke. 

"You already know who I am, right?" 

I instantly looked at him who was already looking at me. 

His question was so unexpected that the stick that I was using broke, probably because I suddenly become tensed. 

We both darted our eyes to the broken stick as we heard the cracking sound. 

"Byun Baekhyun." I said his name avoiding his eyes as I searched for a replacement stick on the ground around me.

When I found what I judged was a perfect stick, I heard a clicking sound from my bike. I looked back and saw his bare hands working on my bike chain.

"What are you doing?" I asked unbelievably causing him to glance at me.  

"This is why I hoped you won't figure out who I am." He replied as he continued to check my bike. 

"What do you mean?"

"You're all awkward and so tensed around me now. I liked it better the last time." 

I didn't know how to respond to that so I just decided to keep quiet as I watch him, fully aware that I couldn't stop him from what he was already doing. 

"It's not just the chain, it's the crankset too. It's loose, maybe broken. You have to have it fixed."

"We can't fix it here?"

He moved his head sideways. "You need to have it changed."

I slumped upon hearing it. My bike was the only means of transportation I had to bring me home since there wouldn't be any public vehicles around this area. 

"I should've really checked it before I left." I muttered, regret evident in my voice. Then my eyes fell to his grease-covered hands.

"Your hands." I told him. "You didn't have to use your bare hands." 

"It's okay." He answered. "Don't worry."

"Ah wait." I said as I stood, fishing for a pack of wet tissue from my purse. 

He also stood facing me. 

Without thinking, I grabbed his hands and started to wipe the grease off of them. I was halfway done when I realized what I was doing. I was holding his hand and his eyes were boring into me. 

"I'm sorry." I apologized as I gave him the pack of wet tissue. 

He smiled as he took it from me, finishing what I had started doing.

After getting rid of the grease from his hand, he handed the tissue back to me.

I was about to put it back inside my bag when he stopped me. He took the pack again and pulled one out. 

"Here." He said handing the wet tissue to me. 

"My hands are okay." I said as I checked them in front of me. 

"Not your hands." He replied as he pointed on my face. 

My forehead creased trying to figure out what he meant. And before I could even say a word, he extended his hand to wipe something on my right cheek using the wet tissue. 

I wasn't sure if it was because of embarrassment brought by the dirt on my cheek or because of what he was doing that my face started to heat up.  I probably looked like a strawberry now. 

I was just looking at his face, I was too surprised to even move or protest. 

"There, all clean and beautiful." He said when he finished wiping my face. 

"Oh my god, stop." I told him as I turn away from him. "This is so awkward."

I heard a small laugh from him. "I'm sorry."

 

***

"Are you done?" He asked, changing the subject which I was secretly thankful for.  "Hiking, I mean." He added. 

"Not yet." I said moving my head sideways. 

"Me too." He announced. "Obviously."

I didn't respond because he's right, I felt so tensed around him. 

"Shall we do it together?" I heard him ask. 

"Uhm..." My mind practically lagged because of his words. "I'd like that..."

"But?" He must've sensed the reluctance in my tone. 

"But now that my ride's broken, I have to get going since it's," I paused to check my watch "almost five already. I have to walk all the way to the town."

"Not if you let me take you home." His reply was brief and confident. 

"What?" I muttered. 

"Well my ride's not broken so..." he trailed off, his eyes trying to read my expression. "I can take you and your bike home."

"No. Please don't do that." I refused. 

He smiled. "Wow, how could I be rejected two times in a row." 

"Oh no, I mean. I know how careful you people are with your private lives. What if someone sees you, or takes your picture and posts it online? It's not safe for you."

"Actually, if you're so into protecting my identity, which I appreciate, thank you very much, I can take you home without getting off the car. In that case no one will see me, take a picture and post it online." He said in a matter-of-factly tone. 

I contemplated for a few seconds as if my life depended on it. 

"I'm a good driver too." He added. 

"Okay." I said, finally giving in to his crazy idea. "But, you can drop me off near the entrance of the town. It wouldn't be that far from my Aunt's flower shop so I can walk from there."

I saw him smile widely upon hearing my words. 

"Copy that."

We exchanged looks and I was the first one to look away, I needed to do that or else I'd start melting right away and it wouldn't be because of the scorching sun.

~♥~ 


	5. Five

Five

 

~♥~ 

 

 

If there was one thing that I had never imagined to happen to me, it would be this. Walking casually with a celebrity.

The first few minutes of the hike was quiet. I was normally shy around people and being with someone as famous as Byun Baekhyun was a whole new level.

I kept looking away careful that I wouldn't be gawking at him and trip myself along the way. 

"How did you know this place?" I heard him ask, breaking the ice.

"My mom used to take me and my sister here when we were younger."

"Before you moved to Australia right?"

I nodded, amazed by the thought that he still remembered.

"This place used to be famous, a lot of people went here. I remembered greeting a lot of hikers along the way. It was what we considered an ultimate healing place..." I trailed off feeling nostalgic and a little bit sad of what the place had become. "It's way too different now."

"Too bad, I wasn't able to see how it was before." He replied. 

"How about you?" I asked causing him to glance at me. "I mean, I don't understand what you're doing in this town. And of all places, the old hiking place."

"Well, a friend of mine used to live here. Before I got scouted by my agency few years ago, we used to come up here a lot."

"So does your friend still live here?"

"Not anymore. She moved to the US. She works there now."

"And you still come here because?"

I heard him took a deep breath and I kind of got the feeling that I must be going overboard. 

"I hope I am not prying too much. You don't have to answer that question." I told him defensively. 

He chuckled. 

"Can I ask you a favor?" He asked. "If you don't mind, of course."

"Y-yeah. What is it?" 

"Will you please relax around me?" He said, smiling. 

"Hah, that's not an easy one." I answered briefly.

"Ah, is it too much to ask?"

I sensed how much effort he was exerting to be friendly and make the situation comfortable between us so I smiled at him.

"I'll try my very best." I told him and I got a wide smile plastered on his face as a reply. 

"So, I still come here because it's peaceful here. Away from the prying eyes of the public. I mean, I love what I do, it's just that you know, you gotta breathe and stay from all the frenzy from time to time. So, I always make sure to find my way up here when I am free." 

"You must be very busy." I commented. 

"Busy is a good thing for my profession." He said.

I just threw him an unsure look since I didn't quite know how to respond to his last statement. 

 

***

 

We continued to hike until we reached the top spot. The sun would be setting soon and the sky was getting ready for it. Pink, orange and yellow filled most parts of the sky.

It was indeed a perfect sunset afternoon. 

"It's beautiful up here." I said as I inhaled the fresh air with my eyes closed. I concentrated on the sound being offered by my surroundings. The wind, the rustling of the leaves of the trees, and the birds. 

I didn't hear any response from him so I opened my eyes and looked at his direction. Only to find out that he was looking at me.

I suddenly got so conscious and I knew I needed to say something before my face turns into a strawberry again. 

"Do I still have something on my face?" I asked, lifting my hands to wipe my face.

He laughed as he moved his head sidewards. 

"You're right. It's beautiful." He said. "Very beautiful." He added, his eyes on me before he turned his attention to the sky stretched in front of us. 

I watched him as he removed his cap, spread his hands sideways, and took a deep breath with his eyes closed. 

"I like this." He muttered. "I wish I could take this home with me."

"It won't fit in your car, you know." I replied smiling. 

He must have been surprised by my attempt to be funny so he opened his eyes and immediately looked my way. 

"That's a really good way to spoil this moment, you know. Why do you have to do that?" He told me in a pouty way as if trying to look hurt. 

I knew he was pretending because it looked really fake so I laughed and for the first time I felt so comfortable around him. Now, I got to experience his humor first hand.

"You're so funny." I said as I continued laughing at him. He looked so cute even now as his eyebrows furrowed. 

"Yeah, I've been told many times." He replied proudly with a wide smile on his face. "I'm glad I was able to make you laugh." He added as he wore his cap again. 

I was about to stop laughing when I saw him stretch his hand between us. I didn't take it, I threw him a puzzled look instead. 

"Byun Baekhyun." He said. 

I smiled as I realized what was he trying to do. 

"I already know your name." I told him emphasizing  the word 'already'.

He didn't answer and just kept his extended hand between us. 

"Park Hae Won." I said finally taking his offered hand with mine. 

"I already know your name." He said trying to copy how I said it awhile ago. 

We both chuckled as we let go of each other's hand.

"How often do you go up here?" The question came from him. 

"Not regularly." I answered. "Only when I feel like it."

"I came back here two weeks ago. I thought I'd see you again." He told me casually. 

I didn't know why but something tugged behind my chest upon hearing his words. Though I wasn't sure if he was being serious. However, I was amazed by how straightforward he was. 

"But you weren't here that time." He added before turning to the beautiful sunset. "So, I thought I'd never see you again."

He got me speechless and it took every ounce of energy I have to force myself to reply. 

"Why?" It was all I could muster. 

His eyes found their way to meet mine again but he didn't say anything for a moment. 

"Well...that's -" He finally uttered but I decided to cut him mid-sentence.

"Are you going to sue me?!" I blurted out. 

"What?" He sounded so shocked, an amused expression painted all over his face. 

"Gosh, how could I be so slow. Of course you wanted to see me because of that-" I stopped when I saw him bursted laughing beside me.

"You're..." He paused as he continued to laugh, his hands on his stomach. "You're funny too."

I wans't being funny so I don't quite understand why he was laughing this hard. 

When he noticed that I looked like a confused statue next to him, he straightened his posture and stopped laughing. 

"How could you think that I wanted to see you just to sue you?" He asked trying to stifle a smile. 

"Well, given the circumstances last time. You had all the right to sue me. I mean you almost fell because of me and your hand, damn- your hand, I felt so guilty when I saw you playing the piano-"

"I just want to see you." He interrupted. "I just wanted to see you again so I drove all the way down here straight from recording two weeks ago."

"Why would you want to see me again?" I asked absent mindedly. 

He shrugged and just smiled at me.

Wow, that was vague. I thought. He just gave me a new subject to overthink about. 

Though, if I would be really honest to him right now, I'd tell him how I went up here the very next day expecting to see him again but I decided that it'd be awkward for me to reveal that information to him right now. 

"My teenage cousin likes you very much by the way." I blurted out of nowhere. "Like really really like you."

"Ah really?" He asked smiling so hard, his eyes turned into crescents. "I can see your cousin has a very good taste." He added as he straightened and raised his chin. 

I laughed at his confidence. 

"Yes. You got her jumping and shouting one time when you guested on a show."

He laughed. "Did you watch too?"

"Huh?" I was caught off guard. 

"Did you watch me too?"

"Well, that was the first time I saw and recognized who you were, so yes, I watched you too."

He smiled as he titled his head down.

"So, do you like me?" I heard him ask and I almost choke at his question. 

"I mean, as a singer, you know my songs. What I do." He explained with a lopsided smile. 

"Ah.." I muttered. "Well..." I trailed as I took my phone out and showed him my playlist. 

I saw a big smile spreading on his face when he found out that most of his songs were saved on my playlist. 

"Congratulations! You got yourself a new fan mister." I told him using my perfect Australian accent. 

"Really?" 

I nodded in response. 

"Well, in that case..." He trailed off as he typed something on my phone before something inside his jeans' pocket rang which I guessed was his phone.

My forehead creased waiting for him to explain what he just did. 

"As my new fan, I'm rewarding you with my precious number."

"What?!" I almost laughed at what he said. 

"You're welcome." He said as he handed the phone back to me. 

"Are you serious?" 

He nodded. "Dead serious."

"Aren't you scared I might be a criminal? Or a crazy person? I could sell your number and make money out of it, you know." I told him in a matter-of-factly tone. 

"Will you do that?" He suddenly sounded and looked so serious. 

"No, of course I was just joking." I replied immediately, intimated by how he looked at me. 

He smiled.

"You're too pretty to be a criminal, you should know that." 

I didn't know why I smiled after hearing it from him. It was as if it came out naturally, like it was the best thing I should do and I wasn't able to stop it. 

"Especially when you smile like that." He added.

"You should stop saying things like that to me or my face will turn into a strawberry any moment from now." I blurted out. 

"Well then, I guess you haven't found out what my favorite fruit is yet." He replied grinning. 

I would definitely be lying if I said I was not beginning to like his smile. 

We both witnessed the lights of the houses from the small community turn on and we both admired its beauty. 

"I live in one of those houses." I said pointing to it.

"Will I be able to figure out which one?" He asked sounding serious. 

"The one with the lights on?" I replied smiling.

He knew I was teasing him so he tilted his head down for a moment probably to hide his amusement.

After a few minutes of small talk, we decided to descend. He also received a phone call which I was guessing would be from his manager asking his whereabouts. 

 

***

He was standing and holding the door of the passerger's seat. 

"Near the entrance of the town, okay?" I reminded him as I sat on the passenger's seat of his car. 

He chuckled before closing the door. I watched him walk and enter the driver's seat. 

"And no getting off the car." I added. 

"Yes, I remembered everything perfectly." He told me while he revved the engine on. 

 

***

As agreed, he stopped the car when we were about to enter the entrance of the town. 

"I just want to tell you that you don't have to worry about this. I won't tell anyone about you. Not even my cousin who is crazy about you." I said out of nowhere since it felt like I had to assure him about the matter. 

"I know." He replied. "I appreciate it. Thanks."

I smiled. 

"Thanks for helping me too." I said as I unfastened the seatbelt. "I couldn't imagine how sore my legs would be if you weren't there."

"Don't forget to have your bike fixed then."

"My Uncle's the best mechanic in town, don't worry." I boasted. 

"Congratulations!" He said smiling. 

I smiled at him before getting off his car before I went to the compartment to get my bike. 

"Are you sure you don't need any help with your bike? That's heavy." I heard him asking inside the car.

"I'm okay, I'm a strong woman, you know!" I replied a little louder making sure he'd hear me. 

He laughed loudly. 

"If you're strong, you wouldn't be scared of bugs, you know." He replied trying to copy my accent. 

"That's not fair! That's a totally different story!" I rebutted as I finally unmounted the bike from the compartment. 

He was right, the bike was heavy and my hands hurt after the whole process. 

I tagged my bike along with me as I walked and stopped next to the driver's seat where he had the windows rolled down. 

"Have a good night..." I paused for a while debating if I should call him by his first name but he seemed to be waiting for it. "Baekhyun."

"Will I see you again?" He asked frankly and out of nowhere. 

"Maybe?" I answered.  

"Maybe is enough." He smiled. 

"Good night Hae Won." He bid, leaving me with his beautiful smile, before driving away.

I watched his car fade away from my sight. 

"Good night Byun Baekhyun." I muttered before I turned around and started to go my own way. 

 

~♥~ 


	6. Six

Six

 

~♥~ 

 

It was almost eight in the evening when I got home. The first thing I did was look for Uncle Jin Woo and told him about my bike. After explaining to him what I thought was wrong with it, he advised me to bring the bike to his shop the next morning so he could replace the broken parts.

We all ate dinner together that night and after helping Aunt Sunny with the dishes, I directly headed to my room.

The first thing I did as soon as closing my bedroom door was throw my body on the bed. I was instantly met by the blank ceiling. I didn't move for about a few seconds then I remembered my phone. I looked for my purse and shoved my hand inside it and took my phone out.

I immediately went to my call register and found an unregistered number which I believed would be his.

I unconsciously nibbled my thumb as I look intently at it. Then my thoughts wandered to him again. I couldn't help but wonder because he seemed so casual awhile ago. He radiated a calm and confident aura. Weren't celebrities supposed to be a little off and scared of strangers?

"Maybe he's not really a celebrity. Maybe he's just Byun Baekhyun's twin or something." I said before I laughed at myself for coming up with the craziest ideas all the time. 

I shook my head as I tried to dismiss any other thoughts related to him. I also put my cellphone on the bedside table afraid that if I put it somewhere near me, I might call or text in in my sleep later.

***

It was about a quarter past ten in the evening, I just finished taking a shower and was getting ready to bed when I heard a beep coming from my phone.

I was sitting in front of my vanity table at the moment, so I turned around  to the bedside table where my phone was and saw the LCD lit up.

I walked towards it and sat on the bed while I casually unlock my phone.

My eyes widened when I saw Baekhyun's number followed by the instant realization that he just sent me a message.

I didn't know why but I suddenly felt a little bit antsy seeing his number in my inbox. It almost even felt like I just recieved an important text message about whether I got the job or not. Something like that.

A big part of me knew I was overreacting so I took a deep breath before clicking on his text.

"Hey, are you still awake?"  
10:16PM

His text message was for sure simple but why was there something weird happening behind my chest?

I stared at his message for a few minutes debating if one, should I reply or two, should I pretend that I was already sleeping.

The latter one was mean, so I settled on the first option, which was to send a reply.

But before anything else, I stood and brisked walk back and forth inside my room trying to calm myself. I took a few deep breaths before I went back to my bed, crossed my legs and started to type my reply.

"Oh hi there...I'm still" I was texting and saying my reply out loud and it sounded so awkward so I deleted it.

"Yeah. You?" I successfully sent my reply at 10:27 and it was too late when I realized how stupid that was because of course he would be still up or else he wouldn't be able to text me anymore.

His reply was fast and so was my finger tapping on it to read it.

"Of course. I'm not that talented to text in my sleep."   
10:28

His words were followed by three crying while laughing emojis.

I could imagine his laugh and the way his eyes would form into crescents by just reading his reply.

I unconsciously smiled as my eyes remained glued to his reply. I slowly felt my body relaxed a little bit  so I started to type a message again.

Me:  
"Now that's something a Byun Baekhyun can't do."  
10:32

Byun:  
"I would appreciate if you keep that a secret too. I'm afraid it will ruin my image."  
10:33

Me:  
"Um, I'll think about it."  
10:35

Byun:  
"Pretty please?"  
10:36

Me:  
"Were you pouting when you said that?"  
10:37

Byun:  
"Of course, I have never pouted this hard in my life."  
10:38

I burst out laughing when I read his reply. I realized it might have been too loud so I immediately stopped myself.

Me:  
"Will you stop being so funny? I'm afraid I might wake the whole household."  
10:40

Byun:  
"I can't help it. It comes out naturally."  
10:41

I sent him laughing out loud emojis as a reply.

Then he started to ask me basic stuff about myself such as my age, my major, where I lived in Australia, my work when I was there, and even my hobbies.

I got him surprised when I told him that I could play the acoustic guitar and a little bit of the electric guitar as well.

It was originally my older sister who was so into electic guitars when we were in the University. I learned a little from her that time but I was not that sure if I could still manage to play it. 

He told me that I should definitely play for him next time which I easily declined as fast as I could. He's a musician and I wasn't sure if I was good enough to play for him. He agreed and decided to let it go "for now".

He also shared a few things about him. Like how it had always been his dream to become a singer and how he was scouted by his agency. I also learned that he composed songs too. He's a gamer and a dog lover as well.

Of course, I made sure I wouldn't ask very personal questions, fully aware that he was still a celebrity. I knew my boundaries.

Our small gettting to know session lasted for more than two hours and it was almost one in the morning when we both decided to call it a day.

I went to my contacts and saved his number under the name "Byun".

I was smiling on my phone while I put it back to the bedside table. I turned the bedside lamp off before I tucked myself to sleep.

***

 

The next morning, I was awakened by my phone ringing. Without thinking, I dragged the upper part of my body near the bedside table to grab it. I pressed the answer button not checking who the caller was. 

"H-" I was about to say but the voice on the other line started to speak right away.

"Hae Won, aren't you up yet?" The question sounded more like a shriek and my head ached a little bit because of it.

It didn't even take a lot of my brain cells to work to recognize that it was my mom. And just like some other mornings, she started to rant about me looking after myself while I'm away.

"Okay, okay mom.. I know, yes... I'm being..careful." I struggled to answer her consecutive questions while half of my face was still pressed on my pillow.

"Yes mom, I know. Yeah... of course...please let me sleep more mom...it's just.." I paused and strove to open my eyes to check the time on my phone. The instant contact with the light coming from my phone hurt my eyes causing me to squint.

"It's just six thirty...okay, okay I'll call later. Yes, I promise. Hmm'kay, bye. Love you." I bid as I put my phone next to my pillow.

Desperate for more sleep, I rolled down to the other side of the bed, burying my face in the pillow. But then my phone started ringing again.

I groaned as I stretched my hand to grab it and answered the call once more.

"Mom, yes I'm going to eat healthy and take care of myself here don't worry." I said in my most obvious sleepy voice with my eyes still closed.

"I promise I'll be fine, m'kay? So please...please let me sleep more. Love you." I said practically begging her.

Though I was still ninety-seven percent sleepy, I was bothered when I didn't hear any reply from my mom because that's so not her. I was about to open my eyes and apologize to her, afraid that I might have hurt her feelings, when a voice - that was totally not my mom's - spoke. 

"Did you just call me 'Mom'?" A male voice said from the other line.

My eyes immediately flew opened as I removed my phone from my ear to check the number on the screen.

Then my eyes widened when I saw the letters that read "Byun". I suddenly sat up straight as I started to panic.

I brushed my hair away from my face and checked my phone again hoping that I read the caller's name wrong but no matter how many times I blinked my eyes, the letters B-Y-U-N didn't transform to M-O-M.

I hit my forehead with my own hand before I finally brought the phone back to my ear.

"Oh my god, I.. I'm so sorry I thought... I was talking to my mom awhile ago and.." I started to explain myself but I was cut when he started to laugh.

"And did you just tell me you love me already?" It was so obvious that he was teasing and making fun of me right now.

I didn't respond because I was silently scolding myself for being so careless thinking that it was still my mom.

"You know I'm just kidding, right?" He said probably sensing my discomfort.

"I know it's just that, gosh...when will I stop embarrassing myself like this." I was not able to stop telling him how I truly felt.

He chuckled.

"It's okay, I find it cute actually." He replied casually.

"Cute?" I almost smirked at his remark. "It's not cute, it's awkward."

I got another laugh as a reply.

"Why did you call me by the way? Why are you up so early?" I asked hoping to change the subject right away.

I heard him smile.

"Well, I was supposed to greet you good morning but you called me 'Mom' so I totally forgot what I was about to say." He explained with evident amusement.

"Sorry, I just got used to my mom calling me early in the morning." I said as I rested my head on the headboard. "And what are the chances of me getting a phone call from a Byun Baekhyun early in the morning anyway. I wouldn't even have thought it would be you of all people."

"It's okay. There's always a first time to everything." He chuckled.

Right at that moment I thought I heard him running down the stairs.

"Are you going somewhere?"

"Yeah, . I have a schedule and my manager's waiting for me outside. I was annoyed that I had to wake up very early this morning ..." He paused.

Then I heard him sipping something which I instantly guessed to be coffee.

"But then I heard your sleepy voice calling me Mom and it worked like magic, I felt better." He said commencing his statement with a laugh.

I didn't know whether to feel annoyed or delighted with what he just said.

"Well, busy is a good thing for you right?" I told him totally ignoring his recent statement.

"You're right." I almost heard him smiling when he agreed. "Anyway, why don't you go and get some more sleep like you were asking your mom." He added emphasizing his last word. 

"Baekhyun, let the mom-thing go, please. It's really embarrassing." I said almost whining.

Another laugh broke from the other line.

"Okay, okay." I imagined him moving his head side wards while he grinned. "Anyway, gotta go now. Have a good day Hae Won."

"Yeah, good luck with whatever you're supposed to do today."

"Thanks. See you later. Bye." He said breathlessly as I heard a door being closed from his end.

"Bye." I bid before I pressed the end button.

I didn't waste any time and dropped my body on the bed again. Of course, I knew that no matter how hard I pressed my eyes closed, I wouldn't be able to sleep again.

How could someone go back to sleep after talking to a whole Byun Baekhyun?

I started to figure out what kind of good deed I was able to do in my past life to have something like this to happen to me.

It wasn't even a good five-minute interval after the call when my phone, which I realized I was still holding, beeped.

Byun:  
"You sounded really cute in the morning though."  
06:46 AM

I bit my lower lip as I tried to stop myself from smiling but the rebel corners of my lips unstoppably formed into a curve.

Right then I knew, smiling was something I couldn't help but do when it came to Baekhyun.

~♥~ 


	7. Seven

Seven

 

~♥~ 

 

It was hard to get Baekhyun off my mind the whole day. It seemed as if he casted some sort of a spell over me.

I thought about him while I walked along with my broken bike to my uncle's shop. The truth was, I kept smiling and I had to stop doing it or else people would start thinking that I had gone nuts.

In the afternoon, Aunt Sunny, Ji Hye and I went to the town centre to buy things for the renovation of flower shop. We bought some shabby chic designed furniture that would suit the vintage like image of the shop. 

When we finished buying the furniture and other things needed for the interior, Ji Hye and I went to the supermarket to buy groceries while Aunt Sunny went to check on the kitchenware section. 

I enjoyed shopping with them and I thought I could finally free my mind from Baekhyun but I was so wrong. Absolutely wrong because when we went to buy groceries, his photo was on the shopping cart, the one Ji Hye insisted on using. I couldn't hide my surprise, so I asked Ji Hye what was his picture doing there and she said it was fan project for his birthday this year. 

Wow, his popularity's on another level. I thought.

"What are you going to do when you see him in person Ji Hye?" I asked my cousin while she took a picture of our shopping cart. 

"Hmmm...I think I would cry Eonnie." She answered without hesitation.

"Why would you cry?"

"Well fans do that when they see their idols for the first time.” She paused as if trying to think of her next words. “Actually, maybe I'll shout before I cry. Then I will hug him and tell him how much I like him.I will tell him that for me, his voice is the most beautiful in the world." She said, this time with a dreamy expression on her face.

"Does he have a girlfriend?" I didn't know why I had to ask that kind of question. 

Maybe it was because my transition wasn't that smooth that the look on Ji Hye's face changed. And I could tell that it was not a good expression at all.

"Is there something wrong?"

"Well, we don't know if he has a girlfriend. Maybe he does. Maybe he doesn’t. I don't know exactly." She responded shrugging. "Celebrities normally keep it a secret because they know a lot of fans will get angry."

"Really?"

She nodded. “But of course I want him to be happy Eonnie. I hope he will have someone who will love him in the future." She added. “I'm way too young for him, anyway."

I smiled at my cousin's unexpected maturity. I honestly expected her to throw a fit because of my question.

"Oh! Strawberries!" Ji Hye exclaimed as we reached the fruit section.

She ran towards the strawberry area and I tailed right behind her.

"It's Baekhyun's favorite fruit Eonnie!" She told me right after I stood next to her.

I paused and thought about what Baekhyun said about Strawberries up in the mountain. 

"His favorite fruit?" I asked.

Ji Hye nodded eagerly. "He likes strawberries a lot. He even likes strawberry flavored food and drinks too. Wait let me show you something Eonnie."

She unlocked her phone and another second later she was already showing me a video of Baekhyun in a particular show where he was happily picking the strawberries from the cake. My eyes widened when he put three strawberries inside his mouth at the same time causing his cheeks to look bigger. He looked so cute and happy while he tried to chew the strawberries.

"He loves strawberries that much?" I couldn’t believe he just did that.

"Yes Eonnie, he's so cute right?"

"Yeah." I answered absent minded while I watched how his eyes light up while eating. "Very."

"Can we buy some?"

"You want some?"

Ji Hye nodded.

"Okay." I agreed as I stopped the video or else I'd start smiling like crazy again.

***

It was almost midnight. I was on my bed, staring on my phone. And yes, I felt like a fool because I was secretly hoping he'd send me a message again or something, which never happened until I grew sleepy and eventually dozed off.

In the morning, the first thing I checked was my phone. I saw four new messages but none of them were from Baekhyun. I sighed as I got off the bed and went straight to the bathroom.

I stood in front of mirror right above the sink. I was pretty sure now that I made a fool of myself. What was I expecting? He's a celebrity. I was just a stranger he met in the mountains.

Hours passed,  I couldn't help but feel frustrated no matter how much I try to lift my mood. So, I made a great deal of effort to keep myself busy. Since we were supposed to re decorate the flower shop, I volunteered to help my aunt. I majored in Interior Design, this would be a perfect distraction.

Aunt Sunny also hired someone who would help us with all the heavy things. His name was Mr. Park. A family man who lived a few blocks from us.

In fact, the shop wasn’t that big, it didn’t take that long. And when we finished, we both felt so proud. It had the vintage aura that we wanted to achieve. 

“Wow Auntie! The shop looks new and very interesting.” I told her smiling.

“I know.” She replied smiling while she roam her attention to her freshly furnished shop. “Thanks Hae Won. You’re really good at this.”

“Thanks Auntie.”

“Your previous employer must have been really sad when you told them you’d quit.”

“Well…they told me they’d wait for me to come back.” I told her.

“You should come back. You have a talent.”

I thanked her once more. I knew deep down that I would be coming back to do stuff like these again. Designing made me happy. Satisfied clients made me happy. In fact, I couldn’t imagine myself doing other jobs aside from designing.

 

***

Before I went to bed that night, I got a little bit annoyed because my phone seemed to magnet my attention to it. I still couldn't help but glance at it from time to time. So, I made sure to take it out of my sight. I impulsively slid it in the drawer of the bedside table before I covered my body, including my head, with my blanket.

 

***

I went to Uncle Jin Woo's shop the next morning to pick up my bike. Right when I got home, I heard my aunt talking on the phone about a delivery that needed to be done. However, her delivery man was not available today. I cheerfully volunteered and Aunt Sunny couldn’t almost believe what I just said. 

"No. I won't let you."

Aunt Sunny doubted to let me do it for a minute, since she accidentally knew about my difficulty when it came to remembering directions from my mom. However, I insisted that I could do it. And the customer’s place wasn't that far from the shop. It was only about twenty minutes away.

“C’mon Auntie, It’s just for today anyway and I don’t have anything to do today. You can’t leave the shop too.”

She looked at me, probably thinking if she should let me or not.

"Okay but make sure to send me a message the moment you get confused or something okay?" She finally said allowing me, sounding like my mom.

I nodded and smiled at her.

 

***

Nine Twenty Three in the morning. 

I was already cycling to the place of delivery. I placed the beautiful bouquet of baby pink carnations and white roses in the bike basket in front of me.

I had always loved baby pink carnations. I loved how they looked so soft and cottony. I also like the simplicity they possess.

As I went along, I looked and tried to remember the landmarks I happen to pass. I saw a cake store named Sweet Galaxies. I mouthed the name of the store about four times telling my brain to remember it very well. And after about another ten minutes, I saw the place. I checked the address from my purse and my lips formed into a smile when I confirmed it.

This was easy. I thought

I got off the bike and stood in front of a green gate while trying to fish for my phone inside my purse only to find out that I didn't have it with me. My thoughts automatically traveled to last night. I recalled putting it inside the bedside table’s drawer. I couldn’t believe I totally forgot about my phone.

"Great. Just great." I said in gritted teeth while I tuck my hair behind my right ear.

Since there was no way for me to contact the customer, I pressed the doorbell. Luckily, someone opened the door after a couple of minutes. It was an elder man, who I instantly judged to be in his late fifties.

"Good morning." I greeted.

"Oh the flowers are here!" He exclaimed, a beautiful smile crossing his face.

I instantly felt happy seeing how delighted the elder man looked.

"Yes, these are your flowers right?" I asked.

"Well, not mine exactly." He replied laughing. 

I chuckled. "I mean yeah, of course."

I handed the bouquet of flowers to him.

"These are for my wife. It's her birthday and these flowers always make her happy."

"That's so sweet." I told him.

He let out of a soft laugh before paying for the flowers. I was amazed because it was like his love for his wife was written all over his face. Right at that moment, I hoped something like this happens to me in the future.

I mean, sure I did receive flowers before but this kind of stuff was different.

After saying goodbye, I rode my bike again and started to make my way home.

Maybe the village wasn't that complicated because I was able to easily locate the cake stop and made my way home with ease. 

When I got to the shop, I told my aunt about how smooth the delivery went and how the customer looked so happy when he saw the flowers. Then she told me that he was Mr. Choi. She also told me how he never forgets to buy or order flowers for her wife. I found that very heart-warming especially when I remembered how beautiful and happy he was a while ago.

Aunt Sunny also congratulated me for not getting lost but she swore that she wouldn’t let me do it again in the future.

“Just in case of emergency, Auntie.” I told her smiling, subtly disagreeing with her.

***

I was not able to come back to my room until I finished eating lunch with Aunt Sunny. It was just the two of us since Uncle Jin Woo was at the shop and Ji Hye was at school. I threw my body on the bed, blinked a few times before I finally remembered my phone. I got up and slide the drawer of the bedside table open. I immediately noticed the light indicator blinking green noting that I had unread messages.

My screen said I had six messages. I swiped, unlocking my phone and I almost forgot to how breathe the moment I found out that all the messages were from Baekhyun.

I checked the time stamp. The first two messages were from last night and the remaining four messages were from today.

Byun:  
How's your bike?  
11:20PM

Byun:  
I guess you must be sleeping now. I hope you see this in the morning.  
12:13AM

Byun:  
Hae Won, ain't up yet?  
09:36AM

Byun:  
Why do I get the feeling that you're ignoring me now?  
11:22AM

Byun:  
Yes, Baekhyun. She's ignoring you. Live with it.  
11:53AM

Byun:  
You're really going to hurt my feelings if you don't talk to me again.  
12:11PM

 

I couldn't believe it. Did I just receive all those messages from Baekhyun? I went back to all of the messages to make sure my eyes and mind weren't tricking me. And yes, they weren't. So, he had been texting me since last night while I was busy sulking and trying to shake my frustration away. He even thought I was ignoring him like the way I thought he completely forgot about me.

I was lost in my thoughts. How could I be in this state already? I mean, we have known each other for a short period of time. Very short, actually. Why were these confusion and complicated feelings here already? This definitely had to slow down. 

My eyes darted to the time on the upper right hand corner of my phone. It was twelve fifty three in the afternoon.

Putting my phone down, I laid on my bed. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on what I should do next. I could definitely just ignore him and my life would be easy and normal just like the way it had always been. Or, I could text him back and expect to deal with this kind of situation from time to time. Because obviously things would not turn out the way I might want it to be.

He's the famous Byun Baekhyun of Korea. He's handsome. He's a charmer. His voice. His ways. His personality. His hair.  His smile. His eyes. Gosh, his eyes and his smile. Really, how could someone, resist him?

The truth was, I could not completely promise myself that I wouldn't fall for him.

I was so engrossed in my thoughts when I felt my phone beeped beside me. My heart pounded like crazy as I saw his name on the screen again.

I filled my lungs with air before I tapped on his message.

 

Byun:  
You might not want to have anything to do with me thinking that it'll be messy. I don't have an ordinary life, things get complicated and controversial around me. I completely understand why you're doing this. I just hope you continue to smile when you hear or see me on TV.  
01:12PM

 

I instantly felt a tug in my heart and automatically sighed right after reading his message. I held my phone with my both hands as I brought them to my chest.

"Byun Baekhyun," I muttered as I closed my eyes and imagined him right in front of me. "Look what you've done to my poor heart."

 

~♥~ 


	8. Eight

Eight.

 

~♥~ 

 

I was nibbling my lower lip while I try to come up of my reply. I didn't like the fact that he thought I was intentionally ignoring him. 

Me:  
Hey, no one's ignoring you. I wasn't able to check my phone since last night. Left it at home this morning too.  
1:16PM

I put my phone down on the bed as I walked towards the bathroom and I was about to close the door when I heard my phone beeped. Maybe I got so excited more than I should because I had totally forgotten what I was supposed to do and immediately ran back to my bed. I grabbed my phone and tapped on the new message.

 

Byun:  
Are you sure?  
1:17PM

Me:  
Yeah. I'm sure.  
1:18PM

Byun:  
I really thought you're not going to talk to me again.  
1:19PM

 

I suddenly felt sad reading his last message. I somehow felt guilty making him feel that way. Though, I exactly felt the same these past couple of days.

I wasn't able to reply yet when he sent me another message.

**Byun:**  
 _I was about to start pouting and cry. I even bought a box of tissue._  
1:21PM

And just like that, I laughed.

**Me:**  
_I feel bad for the tissue. You won't be able to use it anymore._  
1:22PM

 

I waited for about three minutes for his reply but nothing came. I decided to run to the bathroom just as I initially intended to do a while ago.

When I came back, there were still no new messages from him. My shoulders went limp, unable to hide my disappointment.

Right then I realized that if there was something that I should do, it would be to train myself not to feel and act like this everytime this happened. So I decided to just divert my attention to something.

"Should I clean my room?" I asked myself as I looked around. "Yes, I should do that." I answered my own question as I went to my vanity table. There were a lot of stuff on it. Cosmetics, hair dryer, several bottles of perfumes, hair tie-

I wasn't able to even start arranging them when my phone suddenly rang. I put the perfume bottle that I was holding down straightaway before I went to my bed. Grabbing my phone, I momentarily paused when I saw him calling me.

"Hello?" I said, trying to calm my voice the best way I could.

I waited for a few moments but I couldn't hear any reply from the other line.

"Hello?" I said once more but there was really nothing. All I could hear were movements. It seemed like there were a lot of people around but I couldn't hear him.

I removed the phone from my ear and ended the call. He must've pressed the wrong button or something. I thought immediately.

I was still busy wondering when my phone suddenly beeped.

**Byun:**  
_Sorry, the staff are here so I couldn't really talk._  
1:39PM

**Me:**  
_So why did you call?_  
1:40PM

**Byun:**  
_To hear you._  
1:41PM

 

I was unable to stop my lips from forming into a big smile as I read his reply. Honestly, he needed to stop doing this to me or else I'd start going crazy. And as if it wasn’t enough, my phone beeped once again.

_**Byun:**_  
 _If I could actually be very honest with you right now, I'd tell you that I kind of miss you._  
1:46PM

His last message gave me shivers. Oh my god, what was he trying to do to me.

I could feel my face heating up now and I didn't really know how to respond to his messages. I tried to type several messages but ended up deleting them immediately.

**Me:**  
_You should stop saying things like that Byun Baekhyun. Or else I'm going to go crazy about you._  
1:54PM

I sent him about eight laughing out loud emoji too so it wouldn't seem like I meant what I said.

**Byun:**  
_I'm going to pretend you're not joking Park Hae Won._  
1:55PM

I wasn't really joking though.

**Byun:**  
_Do you have a boyfriend?_  
1:57PM

I couldn't believe he's asking me this question casually but I decided to tell him the truth.

**Me:**  
_No.  
_ 1:59PM

**Byun:**  
_I don't have a girlfriend. Just in case you wanna know. XD  
_ 2:00PM

I automatically smiled when I read it.

**Me:**  
_Hmm..I think I should contact a journalist about this. A lot of fangirls will be happy to hear this news.  
_ 2:02PM

I got a laughing emoji as reply to my recent message.

We talked for about an hour before we had to end it because he was already being called. He told me that he was doing a photo shoot today. He even said that I should anticipate how handsome he would be and that I must buy a copy of the magazine. I ended up laughing so hard after he said it.

 

***

The next few days went like a blur. Baekhyun and I started to text each other regularly. And to be honest, I was starting to get worried because I kept thinking that he might stop texting me one day and I'd be left alone to deal with it.

I told myself many times that he just wanted to be friends. And friendship would be the only relationship that could ever exist between us. Yes, that would be the most rational thing that could happen.

 

***

It was a Thursday evening. Ji Hye and I were watching a TV show where one of the guests was Baekhyun. She said that he would be performing one of his songs so we should watch him.

He sang a very sweet song. His voice sounded like Honey. His falsettos were amazing too. And his facial expressions while he sang were so beautiful. He looked and sounded so pleasant that I couldn't help but smile a lot.

"Eonnie?" Ji Hye called me and I momentarily detached my attention from the TV to her.

"Yes, Ji Hye?"

"You love him, don't you?"

I almost choked at her question. I paused for a moment before letting out of an awkward laugh.

"What are you talking about Ji Hye?"

"You kept on smiling the whole time. The way you also look at him, it's like the one in the dramas. Like when the female lead looks at the lead guy." She explained.

Why did she have to be this smart? Did I really look like that?

Was I really falling for Baekhyun?

"Well, he's a really good singer right? And his song..." I paused to think of a very good excuse. "Ah right! His song is a sweet love song. I kind of loved it. That's why I was smiling the whole time." I told her, my words coming out really fast.

She threw me a doubtful look for a brief second then she turned to the TV, where Baekhyun was being interviewed by the host.

"You know what Eonnie? I think you and Baekhyun will look cute together."

"What!?" Her statement almost made me jump. Where was she getting all these ideas, really?

"I mean. He’s handsome and you are pretty too." She said. "But there's no way you two can be together." This time she sounded a little sad.

I also kind of felt sad with her last statement. She was right. There's no way the two of us could be together.

"You're right Ji Hye. He's very famous." I said trying my best not to space out after this realization.

 

***

Eight Twenty Six the next morning.

I just finished taking a bath and I was about to blow dry my hair when I received a message from Baekhyun.

**Byun:**  
_Good Morning. Hae Won, are you up?"  
_ 08:27AM

**Me:**  
_Good Morning Byun._  
8:29AM

**Byun:**  
_I got my manager to free my schedule in the afternoon. Do you think we could go meet up there?_  
8:31AM

I swallowed hard after reading his reply.

**Me:**  
_You and me?_  
8:33AM

**Byun:**  
_Yeah._  
8:34AM

My heart started to beat irrationally upon the thought of us going there together. I mean, yes we already did it the last time but it would be a little different this time. However, I didn't want him to think that I was making a big deal out of this so I agreed.

**Me:**  
_Okay. What time?  
_ 8:38AM

**Byun:**  
_It's a three hour drive from Seoul so, we could probably meet at four? I'll leave right after I finish my schedule.  
_ 8:40AM

**Me:**  
_Got it._  
8:41AM

**Byun:**  
_Okay. I'll see you in a bit. XD  
_ 8:42AM

I stared at myself in the mirror. I would be seeing him again later and it took a lot for me to completely calm myself. Gosh, will there be a day I would stop overreacting like this?

The next few hours went by very fast and I grew antsy when the clock hit one in the afternoon. I went to the flower shop to tell my aunt that I would go hiking, which she cheerfully agreed to.

"The trees must be so pretty up there now, why don't you take a picture for me? And wear something a little thick Hae Won, it's getting cold." She said.

"Sure, Auntie." I replied smiling.

Right after getting her permission, I went back to my room to change. I opened my closet and started to think about what to wear. I first took a baby pink dress out.

"Nah, this is too much. He would definitely think that I wore it because of him." I said, throwing the dress on my bed.

After trying to mix and match some outfits, I resorted to wear a beige knitted sweater with extra-long sleeves, faded high waist jeans and a pair of white sneakers. I let my hair down and put on a little bit of makeup. If there was something I shouldn’t do, it would be not showing him how eager I was to see him again. So I should look very casual and normal.

For some reasons, I also decided to bring a mat with me. I folded it neatly and put it inside a small back pack. I made a final run through my whole appearance on the mirror before going out of my room.

It was around two fifteen in the afternoon when I left the house.  When I reached the entrance of the old hiking place, I left my bike in the corner and started to hike. 

My Aunt was right, the leaves had completely transformed into their best autumn colors. I couldn't help but stop and take a photo from time to time.

"This is perfect!" I exclaimed, smiling as I looked up and saw the towering trees above me; the sun rays struggling to find their way amidst the foliage.

***

I finally reached the top. I rested my hands on my knees as I bent a little to catch my breath for a while.

I looked at my watch, it was ten past four in the afternoon. I went closer to the edge. I spread my arms sideways just like how Baekhyun did it. I inhaled the fresh air while I closed my eyes.

"Ah, so nice! I wish I could take this home with me." I said smiling while I recalled how he said it the last time.

Then my eyes darted to the only tree in the area. Right below it was a flat area. I suppose, I could just get rid of some small stones around it, place the mat there and it would be perfect.

I didn't waste any time and walked towards it. First thing I did was to clear the stones. Then I opened my backpack and took out the mat I brought along with me.

After setting it, I sat, leaning my body before the trunk of the tree.

I closed my eyes again as I try to feel and listen to the cool wind. Nothing beats nature, I thought. It's the ultimate thing that could give me peace of mind.

I opened my eyes to check my watch and it said 4:18. It might take Baekhyun a bit more time to get here so I decided to enjoy the serene view around me. 

I could feel the strands of my hair on my face and it seemed to lull me to sleep which I was already tempted to do but it would be a bad idea so I tried to fight it.

***

I suddenly felt something smooth touching my left cheek. It was like a peck of- was that a kiss? I immediately opened my eyes and turned to my left and I almost had a mini heart attack because I was instantly face to face with Baekhyun. His eyes were boring into me and he didn't seem to budge even though I was already looking at him.

"Baekhyun." I uttered breathlessly.

"Hi." He replied, before his beautiful smile painted his face.

I literally almost forgot how to breathe because of his smile.

He was cross sitting on my left but he was leaning towards me, which I must note, he was still doing.

"W-what was..." My thoughts and words refused to cooperate because I was about to get lost in his eyes. "D-did you just..."

"Kiss you?" He asked, finishing my question.

I couldn't help but blush upon hearing his word. Not to mention, speechless.

"Maybe?" He shrugged.

I swore I already felt melting because of the minimal distance between us, so I backed off a little saving myself from possible hyperventilation caused by Byun Baekhyun.

I turned away from him as I lifted both of my hands to my face and was not really surprised to feel how hot my cheeks were.

I closed my eyes in embarrassment while I bit my lower lip not knowing how to face him again but he did something unexpected that startled me.

He rested his head on my lap.

My body twitched in surprise but it didn't seem to bother him.

I froze as I looked at him. He already had his eyes closed while his fluffy hair slightly parted showing his forehead, leaving me to fight the urge to rake my fingers through it.

He was wearing a white Supreme T shirt paired with jeans. I saw a black hat laid right next to him. He must've had his cap on while ago to at least hide his face.

He crossed his arms in front of his chest as he took a deep breath.

"Ahhhh…this is nice." He said smiling while his eyes remained closed. 

I slowly relaxed seeing how peaceful he looked right now.

"How long was I sleeping?" I asked him, unable to come up with a better topic.

"Hmmm. Long enough to give me time to stare at you and..." His lips formed into a playful smile as he decided to discontinue what he was about to say.

I slapped his arm lightly causing him to chuckle, open his eyes, and directly look at me.

"Strawberry." He said all of a sudden.

"Huh?" I asked him, wondering.

"I'm going to call you strawberry."

"Why?" I asked once more.

"Because your face looks like strawberry when you blush." He said unable to stop himself from grinning. "And because I like strawberries." He paused and met my eyes. "Very much." He added.

My suddenly heart pounded like crazy and I wanted to tell it to take it easy, scared that he might hear it.

"What are you talking about?" I said letting out of a nervous laugh, avoiding his look.

"If I were you, I'd stop being cute right now. I might not be able to stop myself anymore." He said, his tone suddenly changing from casual to serious.

I immediately stopped laughing as I diverted my attention to the view.

"The weather is nice today." I said all of a sudden desperate for a change of topic.

I didn't hear any reply from him so I decided to look at him. He had his eyes closed again with a lingering smile on his lips.

It was my turn to stare at him freely. For the first time, I had the chance to look at the details of his face this close. His eyebrows, his eyelashes, his smooth skin, his ears. Then my attention fell to his lips. They looked so smooth. I wasn't aware as to how long I had been looking at them until I felt myself blushing again.

I fanned my face with my both hands trying to get rid of exaggerated blush that has completely taken over my face because I should not let him catch me in this state.

Seeing him sleeping peacefully made me feel so soft. He must've been really tired. I had been seeing him a lot on TV nowadays due to promotions. I just hoped he always had enough time to take a rest.

I closed my eyes and eventually dozed off too.  
  


***

It was about five thirty in the afternoon when I woke up. Since it’s autumn, the sun was about to set anytime from now. I looked at the sky and the beautiful tinge of sunset colors were already starting to spread in the sky.

After a few more minutes, I finally felt him move and saw him struggle to open his eyes.

"I fell asleep?" He asked me.

I nodded.

"What did you do to me?" He asked once more while he covered himself with his arms.

I laughed. "Crazy!"

He burst out laughing before standing on his feet. He also looked at the view.

"Wow." I saw how his eye lit up upon seeing the beautiful sunset in front of us before glancing back at me.

"Are you okay?" He asked bending his legs in front of me.

"Actually, my legs kind of hurt." I told him hesitantly.

"Oh..." He uttered as he lifted a hand to scratch his head realizing that he was the reason.

I laughed at him. "It's okay, don't worry."

He suddenly turned around with his back facing me. His gesture got me confused for a bit before I realized that he was offering me a ride.

"Ah, no no no..." I refused as I panic a little. 

"C'mon, let's go watch the sunset." He said.

"I can just watch it here." I insisted.

"I'm a strong guy, you know." He said grinning, looking back at me for a moment.

I contemplated for a few moments staring at his broad back, which to be honest was very inviting. So tempting that I did agree eventually.

I slowly and hesitantly leaned towards him as I wrapped my arms between his neck and his shoulders.

He made sure that I was comfortable before he stood. He held my legs both sides with his arms. And I could feel his muscles flexing, probably due to my weight. 

He walked a few steps away from the tree and stopped somewhere in the middle of the area.

Baekhyun was giving me a piggyback ride and it made feel anxious but good at the same time. I was so close to him that I could perfectly smell the scent of his shampoo. He also smelled so good. He had an undeniably manly scent which was kind of sexy. His body felt so warm being so close to mine too.

"So Warm." I blurted out unconsciously and all of a sudden that I almost slapped myself for it.

I heard him smile as he tried to glance at me causing our cheeks to touch.

"Please pretend you didn't hear that." I told him trying to be funny as I moved my head away from him. 

Thankfully, he must have found it funny because he burst out laughing.

"I really like it here, I wish I could take this home with me." I heard him say.

"It w-" I was about to say it but he stopped me by interrupting me.

"It won't fit in my car, yes. I know." He finished my sentence and it made us both laugh.

We both stayed that way for a few minutes as we both enjoyed the view in front of us. It was a good thing he wasn't looking at me or else I would melt right away.

"It's very beautiful." I muttered totally smitten by the view.

"No." He disagreed as he took a deep breath. "Not as beautiful as you are."

I suddenly froze as my hands grew tensed around his shoulders.  
It was as if everything around me faded in the background and the only thing that I could hear were my heartbeat and Baekhyun’s breathing.

~♥~ 


	9. Nine

Nine.

 

~♥~ 

 

I saw the corner of his lips curving into a smile and right at that moment, I swore the butterflies in my stomach had turned into birds. Gosh, this man and his words.

I forced my brain to think coherently and come up with a decent reply.

"I-I told you, you should stop saying things like that."

"Because you might go crazy about me?"

"No." I said letting out of a little laugh for it not to sound too serious.  

He immediately moved his head to his side, trying to look at me.

"If you tell me I'm more beautiful than that..." I paused and struggled to point at the view in front of us. "I’m afraid it might get jealous and make me ugly."

He moved his head sideways as he laughed.

"If that happens, I will never forgive you. Even though you're Byun Baekhyun." I added smiling.

It was a relief that he somehow found my remarks funny and because of that, I was also able to relax a little bit.

After a few seconds, I told him that my legs didn't hurt anymore. So, I asked him to put me down. He agreed, bending down a little so I could have my legs land on the ground.

"Thanks." I muttered and I got a smile from him in return before he focused his eyes on the view.

"Don't you find it hard?" I asked him wanting to ask him something that I have wondered about.

He looked back at me but didn't say anything. He was probably waiting for my next words.

"I mean, you have to go up here. And you have to make sure no one sees or recognizes you. I'm pretty sure you have to do it all the time, wherever you go. You know, paparazzi? Your fans too. How do you manage all of it?"

"Well..." He paused as he shoved both of his hands inside his pants' pockets. "I got used to all of it already. It's hard...yes, but I know I signed up for this. And the fans, well...it's all about them. I mean, if not for them, I wouldn't be who and what I am right now, right? And I like to make people happy."

"Now, I understand why my cousin and all your other fans love you very much."

"Believe me, I love them too." He answered smiling.

I smiled at how genuine he looked and sounded when he said that. It made me feel so soft.

"You deserve it." I told him. "You deserve all the love of your fans. You work really hard. You're also very talented and I kind of think you have a good heart." I added smiling at him too.

"Stop, or you're going to make me cry!" He said as he lifted a hand to his eye and pretend like he's wiping his tears, his mouth pouting like a baby. 

I burst out laughing. I laughed so hard I almost forgot who I was with. I momentarily glanced at him and saw that he was just staring at me with a smile fixed on his face.

 

***

Time passed and none of us seemed to notice it. The beautiful sunset that we witnessed turned into an afterglow and was eventually replaced by stars as the night fell. It was already about thirty minutes past six when we realized that we had to go back since it would be very hard to take the way down due to the absence of light.

We were trying hard to follow the trails since it had quickly become so dark. The only thing that provided light was the pale moon which also struggled to provide light due to the heavy layers of the forest trees.

This was why I always made sure I would be able to go home before sundown because I knew how hard it would be for me to go back when it's already dark. I knew that without seeing the trails properly, I could easily get lost.

I saw Baekhyun turned on and used the flashlight feature of his phone. He was walking ahead of me and I tried to follow his steps as I tail right behind him.

Once in a while I would try to look around and I didn't know why I had to do that. Maybe I wanted to make sure that we were safe. It almost felt like we were starring in a Suspense movie with this kind of set up. I was busy doing this while I continued to step forward. I was unaware that Baekhyun stopped walking so when I got to him, I crashed against his chest.

I was so surprised I almost lost my balance so he immediately placed a hand right in the small of my back, holding and pulling me close to him.

Our faces were less than an inch away from touching. My eyes were glued to his lips first before I looked a little bit up to meet his eyes. Sure, I couldn’t see his face clearly because of the dark but I could feel his warm breathing which made my heart beat fast. I was even so scared to move because I was aware how close his lips to mine were.

"Are you okay?" He asked while he looked at me intently.

"Y-yeah." I replied as I grew a little more uncomfortable with the minimal space between us again.

It was starting to get really cold and having his body next to mine, which I must note felt so warm, was really hard to resist. So, before I did something crazy like wrapping my arms around him, I slightly pushed our bodies away from each other.

"Sorry." I muttered, tucking my hair behind my ears. "I didn't see you right there."

If there was anything I was thankful for with the all the darkness, it would be for concealing my probably-already blushing face.

"Are you scared?" He asked one more time.

I looked up and because of the small amount of light coming from his phone, I saw how his face looked a little confused.

Was he asking me if I was scared of him?

"Ah, no no no…of course I'm not scared of you Baekhyun." I tried to laugh. "I was just really..."

"I mean of this." He spread his arms sideways. "It's dark and it's cold." He must've sensed that I was blurting out nonsense again so he intercepted.

"Well if I were alone right now, I'd be crying already." I told him.  “Like really crying for my dear life.”

He smiled at me and I saw how his eyes glistened because of the struggling lights from the sky.

"You're just wearing a T shirt Baekhyun." I said as my attention fell to his clothes. Very thin clothes.

He looked at me wondering why I said that.

"You're right, it's cold. We have to reach the entrance immediately or else you're going to catch a cold." I rambled as I turned on my phone to light my way. "Let's go." I added, walking quickly, passing him by along the way.

I didn't hear any response from him behind me, so I tried my best to make sure were still following the trails. Then I almost jumped on my feet when he suddenly grabbed my wrist.

"Hae Won, wait!" I heard him say.

My attention instantly fell to his hand on my wrist before I looked up to his face.

"You're right. It's quite cold." He told me as I felt his grip on my wrist loosened before he gently held my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. 

I slowly detached my attention from his face as I looked at our hands.

The butterflies in my stomach made their presence known again. However, I noticed how his hand felt little cold. He must be really cold now.

"Can we do this for a while?" He asked as he lifted our entangled fingers right between us.

I unconsciously nodded at him.

"Thanks." He smiled at me as he walked ahead, taking me with him.

I was busy looking at our hands while he guide our way down.

Byun Baekhyun was holding my hand and it sure did take a lot for me to concentrate on my steps.

 

***

He didn't let go of my hand until we reached the entrance. Without even asking me, he carried my bike and placed it in the compartment of his car. I was just watching him as he opened the door of the passenger’s seat waiting for me to get in.

When we were both inside the car, he immediately reached for something from the back seat. Thankfully, it was a sweater and he wore it straightaway.  I knew he was already struggling from the cold wind.

"Are you going to be okay?" I asked him, worried that he might really catch a cold.

"Don’t worry about me." He said with a smile on his face before he turned the engine on.

***

 

I told him to drop me by the entrance of the village again but he didn't agree. He reasoned out that it was too cold for me to ride my bike. He also insisted to drop me off at my Aunt's flower shop, which was next to our house. However, I protested and told him that I didn't want my Aunt to wonder why I was with someone they didn't know.

"They will be really curious Baekhyun. And we know you can't just walk out of your car and show your face to them." I explained. "Or else my cousin will faint right away." I added as I earned a smile from him.

"Will you really be okay?" He asked with a skeptical tone.

I nodded. "Yes."

"Okay." He finally agreed as he grabbed his cap from the back seat and without saying anything, put it on me.

"Do me a favour and try not to catch a cold too." He told me.

I nodded. Only nodded because his words made my heart warm.

 

***

When I got home, Aunt Sunny wondered why I was home a little late than usual. I told her that I decided stay a little late up there to watch the town lights.

"Okay but try not to do that again Hae Won. It's dangerous and it'll be hard for you to find your way back when it's dark." She said and I knew she was referring to my difficulty with directions.

"Okay Auntie. I'm sorry if I got you worried." I apologized because I knew she was just looking after me.

"It's okay." She said, as a warm smile spread across her face. "Why don't you go eat dinner now? Ji Hye and I couldn't wait for you since she had to study for tomorrow's test."

I smiled at her and before I could even head to the dining room, she called me once more.

"Ah right. By the way, Hae Won. Do you still remember Eun Chan?" She asked.

Eun Chan. I couldn’t believe Aunt Sunny was asking me if I remembered Eun Chan.

"Yes, Auntie. Of course I remembered him." I said not exactly knowing how to feel about her question.

"He was here this afternoon. He came by asking for you."

"How did he know I was here?"

"He said your sister Alice mentioned it to him. He said he works in Seoul and was here just to visit his Grandmother."

"Ah really?"

"Anyway, I think he said he'll be back some other time. You'll probably see him one of these days."

"Okay Auntie. Thanks."

***

I didn't really know if this whole news about Eun Chan being here was a good news. He was my childhood friend. We grew up together going to the same school, having the same set of friends. He was pretty close to my sister and parents too. Maybe that was why he was able to talk to Alice.

He was my friend. No, honestly he was more than just a friend to me before. He was my first love but I never got to tell him about how I felt. I cried really hard when I knew that we had to move to Australia. My older sister and parents knew about it because I still kept crying when we were already there. Eun Chan and I were able to communicate with each other for another three years before we eventually lost touch.

It had been a few years since I last heard about him so this information might have come as a shock to me. If we did see each other again, it would be the first time since I left.

***

When I woke up the very next day, I couldn't help but think about what Aunt Sunny told me. I didn't know why I was reacting this way but Eun Chan had always had that effect on me over the years.

My phone rang, breaking my train of thoughts. I reached for it and found out that Baekhyun was the one calling.

"Hello?" I said.

"Hi. How do you feel?" I heard him ask immediately.

"I'm fine Eun Chan-" I stopped when I realized that I mentioned a different name. I silently slapped my mouth because of it. How could I be so stupid this early.

"First, I was you 'mom', now I'm someone whose name is Eun Chan?"

"I'm sorry…I just woke up and my brain seems to mess up a lot at this time." I explained, hoping that he'll buy my excuse.

"Who's Eun Chan?"

"He's just a friend, I -"

"He? So it's a He?" He sounded a bit serious this time and I was not getting a good feeling about this.

"Yeah...I -" I stopped talking when I heard him sneeze. "You caught a cold?" I asked with evident worry in my tone.  “Are you okay?”

"I'll be fine." He told me. "What I'm not fine about is you calling me with another man's name, though." He added.

I was hoping that he was joking but I couldn't hear any tinge of amusement from his tone. His tone sounded flat and I'd like to think it was mainly because he wasn't feeling well.

"I'm sorry Baekhyun." I said not knowing what to say anymore.  What I did was inexcusable.

"You were obviously thinking about him first thing in the morning."

"No, I wasn't. I don't even know why I mentioned his name."

I sighed and it must have been a little louder that he was able to hear it.

"It's okay, though. Just try to call me by my name correctly next time." He told me before he sneezed one more time.

"Y-yeah..."

"Anyway, my manager's calling me so, I must hang up."

"Okay Baekhyun. Get well soon."

"Yeah." He said before hanging up.

I knew something was wrong by the way we ended the call. He would usually wish me to have a good day before hanging up and today was way too different.

He must've been offended. Right, that was offensive. And the fact that he was sick made me feel more guilty. So guilty that I decided to send me a message.

Me:  
I'm so sorry, Baekhyun.

7:12AM

His reply came really fast.

Byun:  
Baekhyun. That's right.

7:13AM

 

He was supposed to talk to his manager right? But how could he send me an immediate reply when he's still talking the phone? Was that just an alibi to end the call?

"Oh god. What did I just do?" I said biting my lip.

Me:  
It won't happen again. Swear.

7:17AM

If there was something that could make me feel worse, that would be Baekhyun not replying to my message. Which what exactly happened because he didn't text me back the whole day. And even the day after.

***

It has been two days since Baekhyun and I last talked. I didn't send him another message, scared that he might not really want to talk to me ever. Though, of course I really wanted to contact him. I mean, I know he was sick and I wanted to know how was he doing but I guess I messed up. Big time, actually. So, I would just have to deal with it.

It was around seven thirty in the evening. I was eating dinner with Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye. My cousin, just like what she always did, was using her phone.

"Oh no!" She said, her voice sounded very sad.

I was instantly scared that it had something to do with Baekhyun, because it had always been about Baekhyun, for her.

"What happened Ji Hye?" I asked as I curiously leaned next to her.

"Baekhyun looked sick."

"What?" I muttered as my heart almost sank.

Ji Hye showed me her phone and I was welcomed by Baekhyun's picture taken by a fan. He’s at the airport. He had a mask on and he looked so tired, yes he even looked sick.

So, he was still sick.  

"They said they saw him coughing a few times before he boarded today, Eonnie." She said and she almost sounded like crying. "Poor Baekhyun Oppa. I hope he's going to be okay."

"Where is he going?" I asked her when I remembered where the location of the picture was.

"I think he's going to Japan for a fan meeting. He has a three-day fan meeting in Japan."

"Really?"

I suddenly felt a little hurt because I didn't know that he was going to be away. I mean, I know I didn't have any right but he could've at least mentioned it to me.

Well, maybe he would have if I called him by his name two days ago.

I couldn't seem to finish my meal anymore so I told my Aunt that I was done.

Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye threw curious looks at me.

"Are you okay Hae Won?" Auntie asked.

"Yeah, I just…I just want to go to bed early Auntie. I'm sorry." I told her as I went to my room.

 

***

I sat on my bed with my phone in my hand. I couldn't count how many times to tried to stop myself from texting him.

"I would seem desperate if I text him like this." I told myself as I bit my thumb.

I keep typing messages that I also delete right away before I could send them and my eyes even grew bigger when I realized I was typing the words "I Miss You".

"Oh god no." I muttered as I hastily deleted the text.

I threw my phone on the bed due to frustration.

"I think I'm gonna go crazy..." I said as I scratch my head, messing my hair in the process.

I had my eyes closed for a few minutes but they flew opened when a sudden realization hit me.

"Oh my god…” I swallowed. “I'm in love with Byun Baekhyun."

~♥~ 


	10. Ten

Ten

 

~♥~ 

 

I was pretty sure I spent most of the time tossing and turning last night. Distracting myself from texting Baekhyun was such a difficult challenge, which I was thankfully able to at least endure.  

The moment I woke up the next morning, I immediately decided to go hiking. I didn't really know if it was a good thing but I needed to go somewhere I could think properly. And I couldn't think of any other place.

Since I left the house early, I was already following the trails up at around 10:30. I instantly fell in love with the weather. It was cool and cloudy so I took my time hiking. I kept looking around to appreciate what was around me. I looked up and admired the beautiful autumn leaves forming into layers.

"So Pretty." I muttered.

I loved being basked in the beauty of the autumn trees. There was something about being here that gave me comfort. Maybe it was the way the leaves danced with the wind or the way they created a rustling sound in the process. Right then, I knew that coming here was indeed a good idea.

I took my phone out because I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I missed the chance to save this moment in my gallery.

I lifted my phone and started looking for what I thought would be a perfect angle. I already took a couple of shots when my phone rang and replaced the camera on my screen with a call notice.

I couldn't almost believe my eyes when I saw who was calling me. It was him. It was Baekhyun. He was calling me and it was somehow hard for me to process that I stared at my phone for a few more seconds before I got the nerve to answer.

"Baekhyun..."

I didn't hear anything from the other line for a short while. 

"I'm sorry."

"I'm Sorry."

For some reasons, we chorused and even said it at the same time.

"No, I'm sorry." He said once more. “Really.”

"What are your sorry for?"

"For..." He sighed. "For acting like a child I guess. I mean, I made a big deal out of it. And then a lot of things happened, I became really busy. I couldn't find the right time to call or text you. I tried but my schedule was just crazy lately."

I could sense guilt in his tone as he explained.

"No, I shouldn't have-" I tried to tell him but he stopped me.

"No, it's my fault." He insisted.

I bit my lower lip as I attempted to suppress a smile, unable to come up with a response.

"You're so quiet, by any chance, are you smiling now? Or crying? You're not crying, are you?" He asked once more and I immediately pressed my lips together.

I couldn't help but laugh at what he just said.

"You're crazy, Byun."

"Tell me something I don't know yet, Park." He said, emphasizing my last name.

I beamed feeling lighter this time.

"I wanna see you." He said out of nowhere, totally catching me off guard.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'll go come see you when I come back, okay?"

My heart started to beat faster after he said it, my face heating too.

"A-are you sure? I mean, I saw your picture at the airport yesterday and you looked sick. Are you even okay? I heard from Ji Hye that you're going to have a three-day fan meeting there, how are you going to do it? Are you really okay?"

He laughed.

"What's so funny?" I asked wondering.

"Nothing, I just kind of like listening to you nag like that." He told me, his voice hinting a smile.

"But seriously though, will you be fine?"

"Yeah, I felt a bit better when I woke up today." He said as I imagined him nodding in the process. "I'll be fine, Mommy." He added, obviously trying to tease me again.

I knew he was just joking but I couldn't help but blush again, which I thought was okay because he wouldn't see it anyway.

We talked for about twenty minutes more. I told him that I was at the hiking place when he asked me what I was doing. He said that I should go home before sundown or I would cry like lost puppy in the dark.

***

I stayed up there for about thirty minutes. I enjoyed the view as always. I took several shots too.

I was happy and relieved that Baekhyun called and we were able to resolve the absurd misunderstanding that we had. Now, that I had acknowledged my feelings for him, I knew that I had to manage my expectations. It wouldn't be the like the other times I fell in love in the past. I knew for a fact that this was more likely to result to an unrequited love.

Would I be okay with it? I asked myself but it wasn't really like I had a choice, right?

I supposed, I just had to prepare myself for the inevitable. Honestly, it wasn't really like I never experienced it before. Of course, I had my heart broken before.

Then my thoughts were suddenly filled by Eun Chan.

 

***

I spent the next few days helping out my Aunt at the flower shop. She had a client who was getting married so we went a little bit crazy with all the orders and deliveries. We even had to make several bouquets and I had to note that my Aunt was really good at it.

It was a Friday night when I received a video call from my sister. I was on the desk since I had to use my laptop. We were talking about her job being a Music Teacher in Australia. She taught kids how to play several instruments like the guitar, flute and piano. She was pretty talented. We were talking just fine until she mentioned Eun Chan.

"Did you two already meet?" She asked.

"Not yet." I said. "And how were the two of you able to talk anyway?" I asked because I was really curious.

"Well, I was on Instragram one time and I found his profile under the suggestions. I clicked and followed him, he followed me back. Then he sent me a message asking me how I've been...then eventually asked about you. So, I told him that you're in Korea right now."

"Why d'you have to tell him about me being in Korea? You know how was it between us right?"

"Hae Won, that was years ago. And he still seemed pretty curious about you. Who knows, this might be it."

"No, of course it’s not like that." I contradicted.

She burst out laughing. "I know you still like him." She teased.

I was about to protest when I saw a message notification on my phone, which was right beside my laptop. I immediately tapped on it.

Byun:  
Can I come and see you tomorrow?

9:12PM

 

I could feel a smile growing, totally forgetting about my sister.

"Hey! Why are you smiling like a crazy woman right now?" She asked, probably wondering why I suddenly smiled. "Is that Eun Chan?"

"No!!!" I answered quickly.

Her eyebrows furrowed. "So, who is it?"

"It's a secret, Eonnie." I told her smiling.

"Oh my gosh!" She gasped. "Did you meet someone there?"

"Yeah. But he's just a friend." I said totally surprised by how sad my tone sounded.

"Ah, don't give me that Park Hae Won. Tell me more about his guy." She demanded.

"Eonnie, I swear. This is nothing." I said not knowing how to exactly drop the topic because obviously, I couldn't tell her about Baekhyun.

I endured my sister's interrogation for the next few minutes. I realized that I should be very careful around her.

Alice and I had grown very close to each other. She was like a sister and a best friend to me. It also meant one thing, she could read me easily so I would be in big trouble if I happen to accidentally reveal something to her.

I had to wait for my conversation with Alice to finish before I sent a reply to Baekhyun. We both agreed to see each other tomorrow.

 

***

The very next day, I couldn't help but wake up with a smile on my face knowing that I would be seeing him again today. I even felt like wearing my favorite light blue one piece that I brought with me from Australia.

We were supposed to meet a little bit later so I spent the first few hours of the day at the flower shop. It was about after lunch time when Aunt Sunny asked me to look after the shop for the mean time while she looked for something in the house.

I was busy checking the flowers on the rack, making sure that they were as fresh as ever. My eyes lingered on the fresh baby pink carnations. I smiled, satisfied by their beauty.

Maybe I was so engrossed in what I was doing that I wasn't able to notice someone just walked in.

"What a lovely view." A man's voice caught my attention.

I stopped, even froze that I wasn't able to turn to the owner of the voice right away.

"Hi, Hae Won." He said once more as he stepped and stood right in front of me.

"E-eun Chan..." I muttered when I was finally able to find the courage to look at him.

"It's been a long time." He said with a hesitant smile on his face.

"Yeah." I replied. "How are you here right now? I thought you’re in Seoul." I added trying to shove the awkwardness I feel away.

"I'm just visiting my folks. I heard from Alice that you're here so I came by hoping to see you. I was here last week actually."

“Yeah, I heard from Aunt Sunny.”

Then I saw him picked one of the baby pink carnations and handed it to me.

I shot him a questioning stare.

"For you. I knew you've always liked carnations."

"Thanks." I smiled as I took the flower from him.

"You look very pretty." He said, staring straight into my eyes.

I didn't know to describe how I truly felt when he said that. I couldn't seem to focus and process the idea that Eun Chan was really standing right front of me.

He was a lot taller now, even more handsome than I remembered. And if there was something that didn't seem to change, it was his smile. It was the same smile that I had always loved seeing on his face.

"I missed you." He said softly.

I let out of a nervous laugh. "What are you talking about Eun Chan?"

"Well, we haven't seen each other for a few years.”

"Yeah, because you stopped communicating with me remember?" I told him in a matter of fact kind of tone, before smiling. I didn't want him to think that I was still bitter because of something that happened a long time ago.

He tilted his head down as he shoved his hands inside his jeans' pockets.

"I know. And I have long realized how stupid that was." He said. "I was young and I guess, I didn't know how to deal with all of that back then."

I sensed the tension between us growing. Gosh, it's awkward.

"Can we..." He trailed. "Can we like go out for coffee or something?"

I immediately looked at him in the eye. "Are you asking me out Eun Chan?" I asked trying not to misunderstand things.

"Y-yeah. If it's not too late, yet." He told me.

I was sure that if this happened months ago, I would've said yes immediately. But things were way too different now. Honestly, I didn't even know how I felt about all of these. All I know was that my heart didn't react like how it had always responded to his presence.

"Um, I can't today Eun Chan, I have somewhere to go." I told him.

He looked a little bit surprised and disappointed.

"Ah really? It's okay. I mean, I came unannounced. I totally understand. How about some other time?"

I somehow didn't want him to feel that I was pushing him away because we had been good friends anyway, so I nodded.

I saw how his face lit up in my agreement.

"I'm really happy to see you again." He said before leaning towards me, pulling me into a gentle hug.

I was too surprised and taken aback to protest. I blinked my eyes a few times trying to check if everything was real.

I couldn't look at him properly when he pulled away. And right at that moment, I looked outside the shop and couldn't almost believe when I spotted a familiar black car across the street.

My heartbeat went crazy totally aware who was behind the tinted windows.

I spaced out for a moment totally forgetting about Eun Chan and that he just finished hugging me.

"Hae Won, are you okay?" I heard him ask.

I tore my attention away from the black car and faced Eun Chan.

"Uh, yeah. I-I'm okay." I smiled hesitantly. “Of course.”

"Okay, then I'd like to pay for the flower."

"No, no no. I'll just put it back." I said as I turned to put the flower back but Eun Chan grabbed my hand.

"No, I intend to give it to you so please let me pay for it."

I nodded as I looked at him.

I glanced at the car before I led Eun Chan to the counter to pay for the carnation. He also asked for my number and I gave it to him since I was too rattled to even think properly.

When Eun Chan left the shop, I remained seated on the chair behind the counter.

I felt like I couldn't even breathe properly. How on earth was Byun Baekhyun parked across the street right now? Was he out of his mind? I knew he was coming but I never expected him to be right outside the shop.

I slowly stepped outside to check if he was still there. And he was. I stood in front of the flower shop for a good two minutes until he rolled the window down. He was wearing a cap and sunglasses. Just enough cover to conceal his face. He looked at me for a while. He wasn't smiling though. He even looked serious actually. I got nervous.

 

***

I went to the house to tell Aunt Sunny that I had to go out. Then I headed to my room and grabbed my purse. I was about to go out when I passed by the mirror.

"Isn't this too much?" I contemplated looking at my appearance.

My hair was down so I decided to tie it up in a loose ponytail before I went out to get my bike. Since we should be careful, I shouldn't be crossing the street and directly hop into his car.

I took my phone out and sent him a text message.

Me:  
Not here. Let's just meet at the entrance.

1:12PM

 

I knew I didn't have to wait for his reply when he made a U-turn and drove away from the shop.

About 20 minutes later of unhurried cycling, because of course, I was wearing a dress which I somehow kind of regretted, I was surprised to see his car parked on one side of the road right in front of an old, shabby, two story house. It was an abandoned house.

I wondered why he stopped here. Even though not a lot of people pass this area, I still didn't think that this was a good idea.

I hopped off my bike and left it behind his car. I stood right next to the driver's window. I waited for a bit hoping he would roll the window down but he didn't.

What's with this guy again? I wondered. I decided to knock but he didn't budge. I knocked again and again until I already felt a little bit embarrassed just standing there and was obviously being ignored.

I didn't know why but I could feel my anger building up. This was the first time I felt this towards him. I mean gosh, it's crazy.  It was upsetting.

I knocked one last time before I turned around to leave. If he didn't want to talk to me, I'd better go.

"Suit yourself Byun." I muttered, biting my lip trying to stop myself from crying.  

My chest was pounding as I was about to climb up my bike when I heard him opening the door of his car.

I turned around and watched him as he got out. Sure, he got into my nerves but my heart almost skipped a beat as I focused on him.

He was still wearing the black cap partnered with sunglasses I saw a while ago and a dark blue denim jacket over a plain white T-shirt. He paired it with jeans and sneakers. His right hand was shoved inside his pocket while the other one, which was sporting a silver watch, was holding the door of his car.

"How is this man this good looking?" I hissed slowly making sure he wouldn't hear me.

Yes, I know I have seen him a few times but I still couldn't get over the idea of how unreal he looked everytime.

I waited for the next thirty seconds for him to speak but no words came out of his pretty mouth. I let out of a harsh sigh as I let go my bike, leaving it crashing onto the ground. I marched towards him, of course trying my best to glare at him. I stopped when I was already about a foot away.

After finally closing the door, he looked at me from head to toe before letting out of a smirk.

I instantly became conscious. Maybe wearing this dress was a very bad idea.

"You look very pretty today." He said but it didn't sound like a compliment. I knew he was being sarcastic.

"He must have liked it very much." He added wearing the same tone.

My mouth fell open at his absurdity.

"And I'm sorry if you had to cut your flirting time with that guy short because of me." He continued to sound smug.

"What the hell, Baekhyun?!" I blurted out, unable to stop my emotions anymore. I felt like crying and yelling at him at the same time.

Yet, he just stood there looking down at me. I could feel the coldness emanating from his presence. I even had to blink twice to make sure that I did see his jaw clenching.

"Did you just come here to insult me?" I asked, my voice low this time.

"How is this insulting you? I just told you what I saw with my own eyes. YOU WERE FLIRTING WITH HIM."

I glared at him but I was unable to fight the heavy weight of my tears anymore. I was angry and I was crying. I couldn’t understand why he was acting this way. I mean, if I wasn’t being realistic, I would think that he was jealous. But of course that’s ridiculous.

"So what?" I snapped as I forcefully wiped my tears away. "If I was indeed flirting with him, what is it to you?"

He didn't answer but I saw how his hand formed into a fist.

"Why do you have to act like a jerk about it?" I asked him once more.

I saw his jaw clenched one more time and I thought it was a good thing that his eyes were covered by the sunglasses. That way I wouldn't see him glaring at me. Not to mention that this was the first time I've seen him angry.

He took a deep breath.

"Nothing. You're right, it doesn't have anything to do with me." He said but he didn't just sound sarcastic. I was sure he sounded hurt. 

Then he turned away to open the door of the car.

This made me so angry.

He was obviously leaving.

He was just going to leave me right here.

"Really?" I asked since my ability to come up with a decent reply probably malfunctioned because of anger.

"Of course." He replied as he turned around to face me. "You can go flirt with any guy you like. It has nothing to do with me, right?" He added just as he was about to get inside the car.

After hearing it from him, my feet moved towards him before I could even have the time to think. I grabbed him by the arm. 

"THEN WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ACTING LIKE A JEALOUS BOYFRIEND?!" I yelled since I couldn't really stop myself anymore. I was so angry my tears started to roll down my cheeks again.

He must have been taken aback with my force and my words or maybe with my crying that he didn't move for a second and just stared at me.

However, what he did next almost caused me to breakdown.

He took my hand off his arm, got inside the car... and left.

 

***

I just stood there as my vision started to blur because of my tears and it was just a good minute after that I started to move and walk back to my bicycle. I bent my knees to lift it from the ground as I recalled what just happened. I can't believe it turned out this way. I mean, I woke up today excited to meet him that I even spent a lot of time thinking about what to wear. But right now, I just felt so stupid for expecting.

He was and would always be the famous Byun Baekhyun anyway. He would never be someone ordinary that I could be friends with. An actual guy who could return my feelings. Yes, I was anticipating the heartbreak, but I didn't see it coming this soon.

 So now, I might as well just accept the fact that I would never see him in person again.

I didn't really have the right body coordination to ride the bike properly so I decided to just walk. I was about to turn around to head back to the town when I heard tires squeaking and eventually stopped a few meters away from where I was.

He came back.

My knees started to feel limp as I watched him get off the car. He wasn't wearing the cap and the sunglasses anymore. He seemed angry and breathless too. He even left the door open again as he walked and stopped a few feet away from me.

I automatically wiped my tears with my hand, foolishly hoping that I could still fix the mess that I was already.

"You really want to know why I acted like a jealous boyfriend?" He asked vehemently as his hands formed into fists again before he took a deep breath as if trying to calm himself.

Then he started to walk closer and stopped when he was exactly a foot away. I looked at his bare face as he raked his hair with his hands. He looked pretty tensed right now. I saw him bite his lower lip before he stuck his tongue out to wet his lips and then he looked at me intently.

“Because I wanted to be your boyfriend so bad Park Hae Won.” He added.  “So bad, I think I’m going to go crazy.”

 

 

Oh god.

~♥~ 


	11. Eleven

Eleven

 

~♥~ 

 

Oh god.

For one moment there, it almost felt like everything started to spin around us. It was like everything turned into what seemed to be a faded background and the only thing clear was the two of us. He was gazing at me and it took every ounce of energy I have left to meet his eyes. It was if I was being hypnotized. My eyes followed his every move. His eyes, his lips, his hair, his hands.

I swore the sound of my heartbeat was likely to defeat the wind because it was all that I could hear. I was just standing there, speechless, yet everything was in chaos inside me. I couldn't think straight. I had a hard time convincing myself that he just confessed, that he just told me the very words I would want to hear. And the fact that I was totally aware of who he was made everything seemed so unreal.  

Then I heard something, it was an approaching sound. I looked behind and saw a car going to our direction. I bit my lower lip as I became more tensed and rattled at the same time. I also saw how panic slightly took over the look on his face when I looked back at him. He wasn't wearing anything to cover his face so standing in the open was a very bad thing. He was very much exposed and we both need to come up of something real quick or else we would both be in a big trouble.

"Baekhyun-" I uttered helplessly as I heard the vehicle nearby but he, without any warning, pulled me into a tight hug. He also spun our bodies around so fast that I swore my feet left the ground for a second, making sure he had his back on the road right before the car passed by.

I felt his hand at the back of my head, my face buried on his neck. I had my eyes closed for a while and I only opened them when I noticed how audible his heartbeat was. It was racing, maybe because of what just happened. I spent a few seconds listening to it. His body also felt so warm just like the last time. And yes, I was too focused on him that it was too late for me to realize where my hands were. My hands were in fact wrapped around him. I was hugging him back and that realization instantly made me blush. It also nudged me back to the reality that we were still on the road.

I was sure that the coast was clear yet for some reasons, we remained that way for the next few moments. My hands seemed too scared to make any movements just as his hands were also still on the same place.

When I was finally able to convince my entire body to detach from him, he refused to let me go. Hugging me even tighter this time. 

I was about to open my mouth to protest as I removed my hands around him when he started to speak.

"Please let me hold you a bit longer." He said almost whispering next to my ear and it immediately sent shivers down to my spine that I could only bite my lips in response. 

"I like you." He paused as I felt him fill his lungs with air. "I really like you."

"Baekhyun, I-" I didn't know why or how I had the nerve to open my mouth but it ended up being cut once more.

"Shhh..." He intercepted. 

"Can I be very honest with you?" I heard him ask as he loosened his arms around me before finally letting me go.

I was too overwhelmed to reply or even nod. But then I guess, he took my silence as an agreement. 

"You know, things seldom turn out easy for me. Especially when it's about how I feel.” He said looking straight into my eyes. “There are just a lot of things that I want to do but I have all eyes on me so I have to be very careful all the time. And whenever I try to think of the possible consequences, I get a little scared…” He paused as he momentarily looked away and took a deep breath. “I'm scared to hurt people around me, especially those who trust me. And believe me, I've lived that way for a while now." He tilted his head down as he lifted a hand to brush his hair up, revealing his forehead.

I felt a tug in my heart. I couldn’t imagine what he had to go through to get to where he's right now. He must’ve sacrificed a lot of things.

When he looked up, he made sure to meet my eyes again and my heart automatically reacted to his stare by pounding. He let go of his hair as he slightly stuck his tongue out to wet his lips before talking once again. 

"But you, the way I feel about you, I know it's something I can't turn away from."

I swore I instantly felt like falling to the ground. My knees felt really weak after hearing those words from him. I didn't know what to say nor what to do because  I still couldn't think properly. All I knew was that if I didn't say something, I might end up slapping myself to make sure that I wasn't dreaming because all of these felt like a dream. His words were something I'd only hear from the movies. This couldn't be real, could it?

"Baekhyun I.." I stopped and closed my mouth as I failed to come up with a decent reply again. 

Gosh, I felt so stupid right now. I was fully aware that he was waiting for me to say something.

"Do you like me?" He unexpectedly asked.

Surprised, I immediately met his eyes. 

“Please don’t –"

"Do you like me?" He asked me once again, ignoring my attempt to reason out.

I was looking at his face and for some reasons, I got distracted by how good he looked and immediately realized that I need to get him out of here.

"Baekhyun, you're not wearing anything to cover your face. You're too exposed here." I told him and was miraculously able to move and step away from him.

I knew that was so stupid of me to response that way but I wasn’t ready. I couldn’t think properly and I didn’t want to do something that I might regret later.

I walked with my bike towards his car expecting him to follow me but I heard no footsteps behind me. 

"Do you like me?" He asked for the third time, this time a little bit louder since I distanced myself away from him.

I stopped on my feet. I closed my eyes as I took a deep breath. I felt like exploding because of suppressing all these emotions. I slowly turned around to face him again and found him still standing on the same spot. I met his eyes and though I wasn't standing close to him, I knew that he looked a little hurt. 

“Do you like me?” It was the fourth time, his eyes piercing straight to my being. 

I looked at him from head to toe. He's definitely not some ordinary guy whom I have feelings with. He's Byun Baekhyun. He's one of Korea's top celebrities and I didn't know if I could handle this. But seeing him right now made me feel so weak. It made me question if being rational would be the right thing to do. My heart was racing and my face was burning at the same time. I knew I just couldn't contain this any longer.

"Yes." I muttered as I nodded. "Yes. Baekhyun. I like you." I added trying my best to prevent my voice from shaking.

I saw how his face lit up after hearing it from me and I couldn't help but let go of the tears that were already pooling in my eyes. 

"But you’re Byun Baekhyun and I don’t know if I had the right to feel this way about you.”

Hearing it, he suddenly made hasty steps towards me with a determined look on his face. And I almost went deaf because of the pounding behind my chest as I saw him approaching.

“But I like you very much that I can't even think straight right now." I added still trying to keep my composure. 

I just had to hold my breath when he stopped in front of me and instantly pulled me into a tight hug. It was a bone crushing kind of hug. It was the kind of hug that did not need any words from any of us.

I couldn't help but smile despite the rolling of my tears down my cheeks because it felt really good and satisfying. It was relieving too. It absolutely felt like a sum of so many good things in life. We stayed that way for a few more seconds before I broke the silence.

"Baekhyun, I think we need to get you out of here before someone sees you." I reminded him. 

I felt him hesitantly loosened his arms around me as we broke the hug. He lifted a hand to touch my cheek and looked at me intently for a moment before he roam his attention around. It seemed as if he was trying to contemplate about something.

“Ah this is driving me crazy.” He hissed, his both hands on his waist now.

I looked at him wondering as he took a deep breath before taking the bike from me and put it inside the compartment of his car. Then he went back to grab me by the hand, leading me to the passenger’s seat.

 

***

I tried my very best to sit still while I threw secret glances at him as he drove. I was about to do the same thing when I saw him already looking at me, his lips forming into a smile.

Oh, dear butterflies, take it easy on me. 

I smiled back at him because I was genuinely happy. Then I tried to look outside the window but was distracted when he suddenly but gently held my hand. His smooth and delicate looking fingers loosely intertwining with mine. I even had to stop myself from giggling like a teenager when he softly rubbed my hand with his thumb. I looked up and saw his attention already on the road with an obvious smile on his face.

When we finally arrived at the entrance of the hiking place. He got out of the car first and walked to the other side to hold the door open for me. He offered his hand to help me get off which I gladly took. He closed the door after I thanked him. When I tried to walk away, he surprisingly stepped closer to me causing me to step back. I instantly felt nervous as he made another step, pinning me next to the car. My heart almost skipped a beat because of his sudden act.

He wasn't touching me but the intense stare I was getting from him was too much for me to handle. Then as if everything was in slow motion, I watched him lean closer resting both of his hands on the car. I was held captive. And I couldn’t move because I was totally aware of how near we were to each other.

The first thing I felt was my face heating, which I should consider normal whenever he was around. Next, my inability to breathe properly as he continued to gaze at me. He was staring at me differently this time. Maybe it was because of the thought that we both knew how we felt for each other. I was staring back at him when he broke the connection as his attention fell on my lips. And for some unexplained reasons, I couldn't help but focus my attention on his lips too, my eyes spending a little more time on his lip mole on the upper right corner. I even saw how his lips slightly parted before he slowly moved his face even closer to mine. He was so close that I could feel his breath fanning on my face. I swore I felt my hands crumpling the hem of my one piece dress at that very moment.

And when tilted his head to the side, I knew he was going to kiss me and I couldn’t help but panic. So, just as his lips were to touch mine, I turned away.

He immediately shot a surprised look at me. However, I was just as shocked as he was. Then I saw how his face slowly turned red.

Did I just see him blush? Oh my gosh, what did I just do?

He cleared his throat as he removed his hands from the car.

"I'm sorry…I was just..." I explained stuttering of course. Though there was nothing I could say to justify what I just did.

"Ah, no it's okay." He replied quickly as he smiled at me.

I could sense that he did that to ease the tension between us. I looked away, biting my lip as I silently scold myself. I was certain I made the situation a thousand times uncomfortable. But then I felt his hand on mine causing me to look back at him.

"Shall we go now?" He asked plastering a very attractive smile on his face.

"Yeah." I nodded without hesitation.

I tried to lead the way because I didn’t want to meet his gaze. I was still too shy and flustered. However, I was just about three steps away when he suddenly pulled me back causing me to lose my balance, sending me crashing into his chest.

I didn’t have time to even feel dizzy because in just a matter of seconds, I was sandwiched between him and the car once more. I was so startled, unable to say anything. I could only look at his face which was only about an inch away from mine. He lifted a hand to remove the falling locks from my face, tucking them behind my ear. The same hand he used to hold my neck, his thumb resting gently on my earlobe.

"Actually…” He muttered without looking away. “It's not okay." He said briefly giving me a tight lipped smile with a playful look on his face before he unstoppably planted a kiss on my lips.

I could only close my eyes, his lips felt so warm and soft as they collided with mine for a brief moment. Right after he broke the kiss, I opened my eyes once again and saw him staring at me intently. His eyes were searching, as if he was trying to read me.

Then he lifted his other hand, brought it to the other side of my neck as he gently tilted my head up to have a better access to my mouth.  

I swore my world seemed to stop spinning the moment his lips landed on mine again. I automatically closed my eyes and almost got crazy on the feel of his lips. The soft caress that his lips was doing against mine was sending me all kinds of feelings. But unlike the first kiss, this was only soft for the first few moments before it gradually increased in intensity. And I couldn’t help but felt a rush of warmth and surrender. I couldn't think of anything but his lips and what he's doing to me right now. And I knew there wasn’t any use for being logical at this state so I obediently succumbed to my uncontrollable feelings as I kissed him back.

He must’ve been immediately pleased so he gently removed one of his hands from my neck to the small of my back and pulled my body closer to him. I was sure I was on the verge of going crazy. I felt like sinking as my legs started to feel weak so I slowly lifted my hands to wrap them around his neck.

Right at that moment, all thoughts of being rational flew out of the window. I only thought about him. Only him. 

We were both slightly panting when our lips broke up. He was still holding me, our foreheads touching. When I finally opened my eyes, I immediately caught him gazing at me with obvious fondness before he stepped a foot away finally letting me breathe normally.

I tilted my head down as everything started to sink it. We just kissed and this realization made me blush. I tried to look away but I wasn’t able to completely do it when he lifted a hand to my chin and turned my head to face him.

“You should really stop blushing or else I’d start kissing you again.” He teased with a playful smile plastered on his face.

“Byun Baekhyun!” I whined as I stepped away from him.

“No.” He replied. “I’m not just Byun Baekhyun.”

I raised an eyebrow letting him know how confused I was with what he’s talking about.

“I’m your Byun Baekhyun.” He added emphasizing his second word as he reached for my hand.

I couldn’t stop the corners of mouth from turning up as I smiled. I laid my attention on our loosely intertwined fingers as we started to follow the trails.

“By the way…” He muttered as we both stopped.

“Hmm?”

“You’d better tell that guy that you’re off limits. Do you understand?” He said trying to sound bossy but his pouty lips gave him away.

I chuckled as I urged him to continue walking.

“But I can’t tell him about you, though.” I said in a matter of fact tone.

He looked at me with furrowed eyebrows. “Then tell him your boyfriend’s scary. Like a gang leader or a serial killer maybe.”

“What? That’s so lame!” I protested as we both laughed.

 

***

 

Since it was about a quarter to four in the afternoon when we reached the top, it was a bit shady so we were free to stand in the open. Unlike the other times we've been here, we were standing closely next to each other. He had an arm draped around my back while he run his fingers up and down on my left arm. What he’s doing made me feel more relaxed with the close proximity between us.

We both had our eyes fixed on the view in front of us. I even closed my eyes to feel the wind on my face which was very soothing. I unconsciously smiled because I could feel him breathing next to me.

“I wish you’ll always be this relaxed around me.” I heard him say sending my eyes open. 

I looked at him and waited for his next words.

“Well you know, I couldn’t help but notice that you kind of seem uncomfortable around me sometimes.” He said ending his statement with a tight lipped smile.

It’s either he was too observant or I was too obvious. I chose the last one because I had been very easy to read ever since.

“I was that obvious right?” I asked chuckling.

“Yeah. Very.” He agreed, laughing too.

There was a brief moment of silence between us before he spoke again.

“I'm serious about this though.” He made sure I met his eyes when he said it by looking at me. “You know, about you.” He continued as he moved his arm from my back to my shoulders.

I took a deep breath, feeling a little bit uneasy, fully aware that this wasn’t going to be like any other relationships. I felt scared.

“Hey…” He said lifting my chin to face him using his other hand. “I know you’re worried. I am too. But trust me, I will do everything I have to do to make this work.”

He smiled at me, his eyes forming into beautiful crescents before he leaned down to plant a kiss on my lips. I felt my face heat up once again and to my surprise, he kissed me once more.

I looked at him and I was about to open my mouth to protest when he interrupted me.

“What did I tell you about blushing again?” He reminded me with a playful smile on his face.

My body jerked as I stepped away from him because I knew I was still blushing. He first looked at me unbelievably before he burst out laughing as he walked and stopped behind me. He turned and made us face the view, wrapping his hands around my waist as he hugged me from the back. I automatically smiled, feeling the warmth of his body again.  

“Ah, this is nice. I hope I can take this home with me.” He muttered using the same tone just like the other times he said it. 

 I chuckled and I knew he knew the reason why.

“Good thing you can fit in my car.” He said with an audible smile on his voice. 

 

My heart almost melted.

This feeling, somehow it kind of felt like being home.

 

~♥~ 


	12. Twelve

Twelve.

 

 

~♥~ 

 

It was almost six in the evening when we got back to the entrance of the hiking place. I told him that I needed to go home because if I didn't, my aunt would be worried, not to mention suspicious of my actions. She knew that I didn’t know anyone else in the town so it was hard to convince her that it was okay for me to go home late because I was with someone. And if that happened to be the case, she would for sure interrogate me with that person’s identity. That would be a complicated scenario so it would be better for me to go home early.

However, I knew that Baekhyun didn't like the idea of us parting this early.

"Can't we stay together a little longer?" He asked with a wistful look on his face.

I turned to him and couldn't help but sigh. I might have changed my mind a little too fast when he pulled me into a gentle hug. And I had to already admit the fact that I was such a weak person when it came to him.

"I don't want to go too." I blurted out unconsciously.

"Then can we not leave just yet?" His voice sounded raspy all of a sudden as he tilted and buried his face on my shoulder.

"But you'll have to drive back to Seoul." I reminded him while I bask myself in the warmth of his embrace. 

"Seoul can wait." He said in muffled voice.

I automatically smiled. His words were making me feel so soft and this side of him was impossible to resist. We stayed that way for a few seconds while I listened to the rustling of the leaves of the trees around us as the night fell right above us.

***

It was about thirty minutes after when we both finally agreed to leave since the wind began to blow colder. Unlike our ride going to the hiking place a while ago, which was filled with secret glances, we talked comfortably on our way back.

He asked me to tell him something about myself. And of all the things that I could reveal, I told him about the difficulty I had with following and remembering directions. I also disclosed to him that I got lost when I was ten years old and that was when it all started.

"How about now?" He asked as he glanced at me from the road.

"Well it's not that bad anymore but it mostly happens when I'm new to a particular place. Just like how I got lost a couple of times when I was finding my way up there in the mountain.”

"Well, congratulations!" He said, his eyes on the road.

"Huh?"

"You found your way to me." He added ending his remarks with a laugh.

"You're crazy." I told him as I laughed too.

I told him to drop me off at the same place. He knew that I would nag about the risks of him being seen so he immediately agreed. I got out and directly went to the compartment of his car for my bike. I was trying to exert as much effort to carry the weight of the bike when a pair of strong hands took it from me. I didn’t even have time to protest because in just a matter of seconds, my bike was already right next to him.

"What are you doing out here?" I asked and stared at him unbelievably. “You should have stayed inside.”

"It's dark and no one's around. And this bike is heavy." He explained, emphasizing his last word.

He was right. The bike was heavy and this part of the road was still pretty isolated. And given the time right now, it's quite unlikely to have other people around here. However, I was about to open my mouth to argue when the wind blew. I shuddered.

When I looked at him, I saw how his eyes searched me from head to toe. That, instantly made me felt conscious but then I saw him taking off his denim jacket.

"That dress looks very pretty on you but it's not going to protect you from catching a cold." He said as he moved closer to drape his jacket around me.

I couldn't help smile because of what he just did. I suddenly felt a little warm because of his jacket which I must note, smelled exactly just like him.

"Thanks." I muttered, smiling.

"Stop smiling like that." He said looking at me intently.

I did, I stopped smiling right at that instant.

"Or else I'm going to take you with me." He added, his tone surprisingly serious.

I blushed so I looked away fast enough not wanting him to see it. I was afraid that my blushing face might give him some crazy ideas again.

"I should go." I said in a small voice. "Goodnight Baekhyun." I bid as I began to step away from him.

"Wait." He called from behind.

I immediately stopped walking. I looked back at him and saw him walking towards me. I didn't even had enough time to breathe anymore when he suddenly grabbed me away from my bike, sending it crashing on the ground for the second time today. 

He pinned me next to his body, his arms tightly draped around me. My hands, balled into fists, were folded in front of his chest, unable to move because of his jacket.

"You know you can't leave like that." I heard him say as I met his eyes, his right hand cupping my face.

I was taken aback so I blinked a few times as I looked back at him. I was supposed to reason out and remind him that we're outside when he suddenly titled his head to the side before closing the distance between us, his lips claiming mine. 

Closing my eyes, I concentrated on how he kissed me gently and carefully this time. His lips tenderly brushing against mine. The softness wrecking my ability to think coherently again. I felt my hands slowly unclasped, my palms relaxing right on top of his chest.

"Goodnight baby." He said, his voice above a whisper with his thumb caressing my cheek before finally letting me go.

Gosh, the endearment. I bit my lips to stop myself from overreacting. 

"Text me when you get home." He said as he lifted my bike from the ground and handed it to me so I could hold it. "And don't get sick, okay?" He added, his beautiful signature smile accentuated his handsome face. 

I could only nod as response to everything he said because honestly, his voice, his words, his sweetness, and his presence all left me somewhat intoxicated.

***

 

The next few days went so abrupt and filled with Baekhyun reigning my thoughts most of the time. Everything still felt so unreal that I get to spend a few seconds spacing out after waking up in the morning having to convince myself that Byun Baekhyun was indeed my boyfriend.

It had been eight days since we last saw each other in person. He tried to visit me four days ago but it got cancelled because his manager was not able to inform him about a certain schedule ahead of time.

He was busy but he always made sure to send me a text message just like a normal boyfriend would do. He would also call me in the morning before his schedule started. Somehow, our relationship felt normal minus the fact that I sometimes see him on TV and hear a lot about him from Ji Hye.

One thing I observed about Baekhyun was the fact that he was very vocal. He was also straightforward especially about how he felt. He was funny but he also got the right doze of seriousness when necessary. He was cute and charming and I couldn’t really blame myself for feeling this way towards him.

To be honest, I felt a little scared. I mean, I guess this feeling would always be present. His life was way too different from mine and I couldn’t fully convince myself to be confident with how things were going to be between us. However, every time I would hear his voice from the other line, or read his reassuring messages, I get to shake the feeling away somehow. I didn’t like feeling this way. I didn’t want my insecurities to get in the way. I knew I had to do something about it.

It was a quarter past eight, on a Thursday evening, when I received a call from Lizzie. She’s one of my closest friends back in Australia. She’s also Korean but was raised in there. We were in the same University in College, had the same major and since then we became good friends. Though, she’s a little different from me in some aspects. She liked partying and bar hopping which I must note were not my cup of tea. She’s friendly and good with people too. She’s a social butterfly.

“I’m going to be in Korea next week!” She announced using her usual perky tone.

“Really?” I asked, surprised. “Why? I mean, what about work?”

“Well, my mom and I are attending my cousin’s wedding so I filed a one week leave from the company.” She explained. “So don’t give me your lame excuses and go meet me in Seoul.” She added as if she already knew that I was going to give her an alibi.

“Seoul is four hours away from here Liz.” I told her in a matter-of-fact tone.

“Oh my god! I can’t believe you Hailey!” She exclaimed, emphasizing my English name. “We haven’t seen each other for months and you’re also being so vague about your return to Australia, and you won’t even meet me just because Seoul is four hours from there?!” She ranted. 

I laughed at her reaction. For some reasons, I knew that this was how she would react.

“I’m just kidding Liz.” I told her immediately. ”I’m going to go meet you there. Happy now?”

“You better show up in front of me Park.” She replied, not sounding so convinced. “Or else I’m not going to talk to you, EVER!” She paused. “And I’m not even kidding this time.”

I laughed once more. “I promise. Okay? I’ll see you next week. Just give me the details.”

“Good.” She muttered, relief evident in her tone. “But will you be okay to travel to Seoul alone? I mean, I wanna see you but I wanna make sure that you won’t get lost or something like that.”

“So you suddenly got worried, eh?”

“Damn, why do you have to have this crazy thing about directions?”

I could imagine her rolling her eyes when she said that.

“I’ll be fine Liz.”

“Okay, I’ll give you a call when I arrive next week.”

“Sounds good to me.”

“Great!” She beamed. “We’re going to have a lot of fun, I can’t wait.”

“Your definition of fun scares me.” I noted. 

“And your definition of fun makes me cringe.” She rebutted.

We both laughed. We talked for about another fifteen minutes about a guy she met last week. I was trying not to laugh at her the whole time because she totally sounded like she was smitten with him but she kept denying it.

Talking to her made me missed my life in Australia. My family, my work and my other friends. However, I love being here too. And yes, things have indeed changed for me since I came back to Korea.

 

***

 

It was ten to eleven that same night when I received a text message from Baekhyun. I was already lying on the bed so I held my phone right above my face.

Byun:  
Please tell me you’re still up. I need to tell you something crazy.  
10:50PM

Me:  
I’m here. What is it?   
10:52PM

I sat up right after I sent my reply, curious of the crazy thing he was about to say.

Byun:  
I’m outside.  
10:53PM

My body stiffened the very moment I read his message. My heartbeat couldn’t help but race.

Me:  
What do you mean you’re outside?  
10:55PM

Byun:  
I’m right outside your Aunt’s flower shop.

10:56PM

Oh my god.

Me:  
Please tell me you’re kidding.  
10:57PM

Byun:  
I miss you. How can I even joke about this?

10:58PM

I got off the bed and took several deep breaths while walking back and forth inside my room. Maybe, I got too busy trying to compose myself that I had totally forgotten to reply. My phone suddenly rang. The vibration made me slightly jump on my feet.

“Baek...” I muttered in a small panicky voice right after I pressed the answer button.

“You don’t miss me?” He asked, his voice sounded so sad.

“No.” I replied quickly slightly unaware of what I just said. “I mean yes. Of course I miss you.”

“But you don’t sound so glad I’m here.”

“No, it’s not like that. It’s just that how can you be here right now? It’s already eleven.”

“Should I just go back?”

For some reasons, I noticed that he sounded tired. His question also made me feel guilty.  
“No, I’m sorry.” I apologized. “Please wait for me.”

I hastily looked at myself in the mirror. I was already wearing my silk, green top and bottom pajamas. I couldn’t go out looking like this. So, I rushed to my closet and grabbed a pair of jeans, a loose pink shirt and wore a grey hoodie on top of it.

Luckily, everyone in the house usually slept early. I opened my bedroom door with utmost care. I didn’t want to wake any of them up and catch me sneaking out because that would be so embarrassing. When I reached the front door, I bit my lip as I prevented to make any kind of noise. I slipped on my sneakers after closing the door as I made my way out.

Since we were in a countryside, and it was a weeknight, the street was empty. No one was around. I was a little breathless when I stopped in front of the flower shop. My eyes automatically darted to the familiar black car parked across the street. He must’ve seen me because he then opened the door and got out. He waved at me casually with a smile on his face before he spread his arms sideways as if telling me to come and hug him.

We haven’t seen each other for days and seeing him right now made me acknowledge the fact that I truly missed him. So, I couldn’t help but forget about how scared I was that we might get caught or something.

I smiled as I walked crossing the street. And in just a matter of seconds, I crashed into him as I tiptoed to wrap my hands around his neck. I was instantly welcomed by his warmth especially when I felt his arms around me too. I was tempted to snuggle up against him right there, closing my eyes in the process. I inhaled his familiar scent and I involuntarily smiled at how good he smelled.

“God, I missed you.” He murmured and tightened his hug around me.

His words sounded like a lullaby to me. I was lost in our own private bubble for a moment.

We immediately locked eyes the moment the hug broke.

“Did you drive all the way from Seoul?”

“No, I just finished filming something. The location was around two hours away from here so I decided to pay you a surprise visit.” He explained.

He smiled but his voice sounded raspy, maybe because of what he had to do before coming here. Right then, I confirmed that he was indeed tired. I also noticed how he was dressed at the moment. He was wearing a tan overcoat on top of a white knitted turtle neck sweater paired with jeans and sneakers. He was also wearing his round specs with his hair slightly parted. He looked so handsome I had to bite my lower lip to stop myself from gushing over him.

“Let’s go.” He announced.

“What?” My response was quick. “Where?”

“I’m going to show you something.” He replied as he went to open the door for me.

“At this hour?” I asked unbelievably once more, unmoving.

He nodded.

“But…” I hesitated as I looked back at the house. I pondered upon the thought of going with him for a moment but immediately dismissed my hesitation when I looked back at him. He looked tired but he still drove all the way here to see me. “Should I go get my bike?”

“No need. It won’t take us that long so I’ll drive you home.” He stated.

I nodded as I walked towards him and got inside the car.

 

***

 

The drive lasted for almost thirty five minutes. I confirmed that he wasn’t taking me to the hiking place when we passed by the curve that led to the entrance. He drove for another ten minutes before he turned right and the road became a little bumpy.

“Are you sure about this?” I finally asked him, concern probably written all over my face. 

“Don’t worry I’ve been there a couple of times already.” He answered glancing at me for a moment with an assuring smile on his face. 

“There won’t be any ghosts or some wild animals out there right?”

My question sent him laughing.

“Will you stop being cute? I’m trying to concentrate here.” He pleaded, almost laughing while he work with the steering wheel.

It was just about after five minutes later when he finally stopped the car to a particular spot. He left the headlights of his car on to provide just the right amount of light we both need to see our surroundings. I got off and was instantly welcomed by an unfamiliar place. We were in a cleared area, a small meadow stretched in front of us. There were trees but they were standing about several meters away.

I looked back at him wondering why he took me here. He might’ve guessed what was on my mind so he walked towards and stopped right in front of me.

“Look Up.” He uttered.

I tilted my head upward. My mouth instantly fell open when my sight met the beauty of the night sky. There were so many stars. They looked like twinkling diamonds right above us. It was such a beautiful sight I had to stop myself from wanting to cry. 

Gosh, I loved watching the stars so much. And I haven’t gone stargazing for a very long time that this was completely overwhelming.

“They’re so beautiful.” I couldn’t help but compliment the view.

“Yeah, very.” He agreed.

I felt him staring at me so I took my attention away from the stars to his gleaming eyes. And I smiled at him upon realizing that the most beautiful star was standing right in front of me.

“Thanks for coming over.” I told him. “And for taking me here.”

“I’m glad you liked it.” He replied with a fond look. “I’ve always wanted to take you here. I just couldn’t find the right time.”

“This is perfect.” I commented as I admired the stars by looking skywards one more time. “How did you know about this place?”

He laughed and I was suddenly so curious because I was pretty sure my question wasn’t funny.

“I got lost, I made a wrong turn one time.”

“What?” My eyes widened when I heard him. “And here I am thinking that I’m the one prone to getting lost.” I said teasing him.

“Well I was driving back to Seoul one night, it was already a little late. And that was my first time. So, I made a turn and it led me here. I was so pissed at myself at that time but then when I looked up, I saw this.” He narrated as he pointed at the sky.

“I’m glad you got lost that night and discovered this place.” I said meeting his eyes and we both smiled.

I roamed my attention around for a moment. The trees looked scary from afar but the grass seemed to glisten because of the headlights. It was an open place and I could feel the cold wind seeping through my skin. I couldn’t help but shudder at the contact.

“Are you cold?” He asked as he must’ve have been watching me.

I responded with a nod. 

“Come here.” He told me in a gentle tone as he spread his overcoat open on both sides.

His knitted sweater looked fluffy and comfortable. I was a little hesitant at first but I couldn’t resist the temptation to lean closer for a hug. I slowly slipped my arms inside his overcoat and wrapped them around him. He then wrapped me inside his coat with his arms meeting at the small of my back.

We stayed that way and went silent for a few minutes before I spoke and told him about my trip to Seoul next week. 

“By the way, I’m going to Seoul next week.” I informed as I tilted my head up to look at his face. 

“Really? What are you going to do there?”

“Well I’m meeting a friend from Australia. She’s coming over to attend her cousin’s wedding and she asked me to meet her in Seoul since she’s going to be here for a few days.”

“Will you be okay to go there alone?”

I smiled because he totally sounded like Lizzie.

“I’m gonna be fine Baek. I could just ask my Aunt Sunny to give me directions.”

“Or I can just drive you there.” He offered. “That’ll be better… and safe for you.”

“You might be busy that day. And you know, it’s not safe for you.”

I suddenly felt him loosened his arms around me so I made a step back to detach from him, freeing myself from his embrace. Looking at his face, I saw a sad smile painted his lips before he tilted his head down.

“I guess I’ll never get to be a normal boyfriend.” A gloomy sigh ended his statement.

“Baekhyun...that’s not what I meant.”

“I know it’s just that...I wanna take you out on a date. A normal date.” His voice soft with affection.

“What are you talking about? This is a date. And this is beautiful.” I insisted wanting to take his guilt away.

He looked up to face me once more. “I know but I’d like to imagine us in a different place. Like you know, I'd like us to go for a stroll in the city, walk hand in hand while crossing the busy streets of Seoul.” His face somehow lit up as he went on. “Buy you your favorite ice cream, take the bus together as you sit while I stand right next to you-"

"Why would you be standing?" I intercepted.

"Shhhh...this is my imagination, I have freedom." A genuine smile made its way on his lips.

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.” I replied letting out of a soft laugh.

"Okay, so I would be standing next to you, because...the bus is packed, then the other girls will look at you with eyes of envy because your boyfriend is so handsome that he looks like the singer Byun Baekhyun." He paused to grin at me.

"They will look at me thinking that you're way too handsome for me."

The grin on his face disappeared when he heard my reply.

“You're beautiful." He sounded more serious this time as he lifted a finger to fix the strands of hair that had fallen on my face.

I blushed because I could never get used to him telling me that I’m beautiful.

"And I will sue every person on the bus that will make you feel otherwise."

I relaxed as my lips curved into a small smile.

"Then as we get off the bus, we will stand face to face just like this at the bus stop.” He straightened his posture in front of me. “We will look at each other for a while like this.” He gazed at me. “Then I will move one step closer to you like this." He paused as he indeed moved a step closer to me.

"You.” He muttered, smiling. “You, on the other hand, will slowly lift both of your hands and wrap them around my neck…" He trailed off as he took my hands and led them where he wanted them to be. "I will have my hands on your waist as I pull you closer, like this."

His actions followed his words and for some reasons, I couldn’t protest. It was like reading a book. Except instead of the written ones, the words were spoken to me.

"Then, I will stare at your beautiful lips." He went on at his eyes fell on my lips. "I will lean and tilt my head a little bit on the right to find the right angle, like this."

My heart started to pound behind my chest as he continued to match his words with his actions.

"Then...I'm going to kiss you..." He muttered, his lips an inch closer from mine. “Just like this.” He said as he met my eyes before finally closing the space between us.

I automatically felt how warm his lips were and how my cheeks slowly matched them with equal warmth. The kiss was short and he was now looking at me with an amused look on his face. I knew right then that he was trying to make fun of me. So, I removed my hands from his neck as I tried to open my mouth to say something but he stopped me by leaning down to kiss me again. I could even feel his smile on my lips.

"Baekhyun.” I whimpered as I attempted to move away.

"Shhh...Will you please stop ruining my imagination?" He scolded, obviously teasing me. He was about to kiss me once again but I pulled his left ear. 

"Aaahh!” He shrieked in pain as he let go of me, his both hands finding their way to his ear. "Why would you do that to your boyfriend?" He went being pouty again.

"I think your imagination’s a little bit crazy." I explained trying my best to stifle a smile.

He let go of his ear, moved his head sideways as he laughed.

"Just so you know, my imagination always includes kissing you." He announced as he shoved his hands inside his overcoat’s pockets. "This one is actually pretty wholesome."

I lightly punched his arm but then he acted like he was really hurt. He was exaggerating everything and he looked really funny that I couldn’t help but burst out laughing. 

***

 

We were already inside the car and were just a few minutes away from my Aunt’s house when he asked me about my trip to Seoul.

“What do you plan to do with your friend in Seoul?”  
“Well…Liz likes to party to we’d probably go clubbing. She likes bar hopping so much so-”

I couldn’t finish what I was about to say when he suddenly stepped on the brakes and stopped the car immediately. So abrupt, I even heard the tires squeaking. With his hands still on the steering wheel, he threw me a questioning stare, disbelief written all over his face. I blinked a few times as I looked back at him.

I guess, I shouldn’t have told him about that. 

 

 

~♥~


	13. Thirteen

 

 

-

I still had my eyes closed but I could already feel the warmth of the struggling sunlight from my bedroom window brushing against my cheeks. I didn't want to open my eyes just yet because I was still so sleepy. I arrived at home at around 2:30 in the morning but I kept tossing and turning for a couple of hours more before sleep finally knocked me out.

I was desperate to sleep more so I rolled to the other side of my bed as I hugged a pillow but as soon as I was about to lose consciousness again, I heard my phone beeping. However, I took my time stretching for a few minutes more before I sat up to grab my phone from the bedside table. I rubbed my eyes to have a clearer vision to read the message.

Byun:  
No Hard Drinks.  
9:24AM

I smiled when I read his message. I could still remember how his eyes widened when I told him about the bar hopping thing with Lizzie last night. He did look displeased.

Byun:  
Uh, another thing. Try not to be too pretty.  
9:25AM

The smile on my face grew even bigger. Right then, I knew I wouldn't be able to fall asleep again.

Me:  
Thanks. But where's my good morning?  
9:27AM

Byun:  
Good Morning Beautiful. XD  
9:28AM

***

Saturday, 2PM.

Aunt Sunny, Ji Hye and I were at the flower shop when I finally got the chance to tell them about my trip to Seoul next week. Auntie was a little skeptical about me traveling alone at first but she eventually thought that Seoul was a good idea.

"Just be careful." She reminded as she looked up from the inventory she was doing. "Do you have a place to stay there?"

"Uh, my friend and I might just book a hotel room Auntie."

"Okay. I really hope you have fun there. You've been in this town for several months already. I don't even understand why you don't seem to get bored with all of these."

I let out of a soft laugh.

"This town is pretty Auntie."

"This town is boring." Ji Hye said out of nowhere before letting out of a frustrated sigh.

Aunt Sunny and I both looked at Ji Hye who was trimming the roses on the table.

"What? It's true." Ji Hye reasoned out. "I wish I could go to Seoul with you, Eonnie."

"You already know the answer to that." Auntie stated with her eyebrows raised.

"I know Mom. That's why I'm so sad." She really sounded sad while her lips puckered like a baby.

"Don't worry Ji Hye, I'll buy you something. What do you want?" I told her to at least make her feel better.

And it was such a wonder how her facial expression quickly transformed from frustration to delight.

"Really Eonnie?!" She even stood, left what she was doing and walked towards me excitedly.

"Yeah, what do you want?" I replied smiling at her.

"Can you buy Baekhyun's latest album for me?" She was already clinging to my right arm like a kid.

I swallowed before I let out of a nervous laugh. Somehow, I was still not used to hear Baekhyun's name casually like this. Honestly, I think I never would.

"Pleaaaaase?" She begged and I was pretty sure she was trying her best for her eyes to get me to say yes. "Pweeeeeeaaase?" She added blinking her eyes a few times.

"Okay Ji Hye. I'll try my best to look for-"

I wasn't even finished yet when she suddenly shrieked and jumped. Aunt Sunny and I exchanged looks as if that was the most appropriate thing to do at the moment. Then we both burst out laughing.

***

Lizzie's family event took place on a Monday so she told me that we were meeting on a Tuesday. I left the town early in the morning with Aunt Sunny driving me to the train Station. The travel was not as complicated as I thought. Though I had some difficulties recognizing the streets, the cab driver was able to smoothly take me to the hotel where Lizzie and I were going to stay.

She was already there the moment I got off the cab. She was shrieking and went all jumpy when she saw me. She was wearing a white lacy crop top showing her sexy midriff, paired it with a loose fitting faded jeans and block heeled sandals. Her hair was dyed light brown this time, her bangs neatly covered her forehead. She looked glamorous as ever. As I walked towards her and I saw how the smile on her face grew bigger, exposing her perfect teeth.

"Oh gosh! I missed you so much Hailey!" She beamed as she hugged me tightly.  
"I missed you too Liz." I struggled to reply because she hugged me so tight I couldn't almost breathe. "But I'm afraid I'm going to die soon if you don't let me breathe." I told her laughing.

"Hey! You're so mean." She snapped when she let go of me.

I just laughed at her.

"You look great Hail. You're glowing. Is this supposed to be Korea's effect on you?" She asked, raising an eyebrow before she continued. "Or is someone responsible for making you glow?"

"You're still as crazy as ever Liz. Why don't you let me come in first?" I said wanting to change the topic immediately.

"Okay, okay but we're not ditching this topic forever. We have three whole days." She agreed as she held my arm as we got inside the hotel.

As expected of Liz, she chose a very expensive Hotel. Our room was on the 15th floor. It was spacious and it has a glass wall view of the city. I had not seen this view for a few months and I somehow missed it.

I was arranging my clothes on the closet when Lizzie shoved me to examine them.

"Are these the only ones you brought with you?" She asked looking at me incredulously.

"Why?"

"Seriously?" She took out a few of my clothes and showed them to me. She was particularly holding a sweater. "Are you going to have fun in these?"

"Liz, I have other clothes with me too." I reasoned out laughing.

"No!" She contradicted. "Na-uh, these are unacceptable. Enough with your hometown clothes."

"What do you mean?"

"You're going to wear something else. Something sexy. Something daring. Something flirty-"

"What? No." I protested.

"We're going to go shopping right at this instant. Come on!" She announced totally ignoring my protest.

"Sexy and daring? And Flirty? No way Elizabeth. I can't wear something like that." I insisted.

Her facial expression suddenly changed. She looked like she kind of figured something out.

"Do you have a boyfriend Park?" She sounded more like assuming instead of just asking.

I almost choked at her question.

"What? That's crazy." I answered quickly as I avoided her eyes by fixing my clothes.

"Oh my gosh, yes you totally have a boyfriend! Look at you, you're strawberry face is giving you away." She gasped as she brought her hands to her mouth. "Is this why you won't go back to Australia just yet?"

"Drop it Liz. That's a crazy thing to say." I tried my best to sound firm.

"Liar. I don't believe you. You have to tell me about him-"

"Fine!" I blurted out.

"Fine what? Fine as in you're gonna tell me about your guy?"

Trying to win a conversation like this with Lizzie was impossible. This has got to be one of the hardest things I have to deal in my life ever. One thing I do know was the fact that I couldn't tell her about Baekhyun. Not even her. Not just yet.

"Fine. As in let's go shopping."

She was left speechless for a brief moment but was thankfully distracted by the thought of shopping the next second.

"Okay, I'm letting you off the hook for now. Only because we're gonna go shopping."

I sighed out of relief when she finally left me alone. This was definitely going to be a tough time. I really have to be careful around her.

Oh god, help me survive this woman.

***

1:23PM.

Unlike me, Lizzie was very good with directions. She even found the way to the famous shopping district in the city where designer stores and boutiques line up. We were on our fourth store already. Lizzie was inside the fitting room and that was the only time I was able to check my phone.

I had three message from Baekhyun.

Byun:  
Hey baby.  
11:16AM

I was slightly panicking, afraid that Lizzie might show up next to me all of a sudden but I still managed to smile because of his message.

Byun:  
Where are you? Is everything okay?  
12:25PM

Byun:  
Did you get lost or something? Please call me.  
1:03PM

I suddenly felt guilty when I realized that I haven't really texted him the moment I arrived. I knew he was worried so I had to tell him that everything's okay. I was about to type in my reply when Lizzie called me. I was so frightened that she would show up right beside me so I hurriedly shoved my phone back inside my purse.

I turned around to find her holding a dress. It was red mini dress with a deep V neckline. It had long lacy sleeves but the length was absurd and for Pete's sake, it was so sexy.

"What? No!!!" I told her with evident firmness in my tone. "I'm not going to go anywhere with that dress!" I swore.

She stared at me for a while before laughing.

"Oh my gosh, chill Hailey. Why are you so tight? I didn't say it's yours."

I bit my lip in embarrassment. Then I told her that the dress was not a good one so she should not even consider buying it. Thankfully, she agreed and saved herself from the dangerously sexy dress.

We spent almost three hours around the shopping district before we found the dress that she wanted. It was a maroon, knee leveled, halter dress that she bought for herself. As for me, she made me try on a few sexy dresses which I had all refused. In the end, I got her to be okay with a black satin, spaghetti strapped top. It had a V neckline but it wasn't too revealing because of the lace accent. I also bought a new pair of black high waist jeans and a pair of red stilettos Liz really insisted on buying.

***

It was already around five in the afternoon when we went back to the hotel. However, it was for another thirty minutes later when I was finally able to call Baekhyun. Lizzie went to the lobby so I had the whole room to myself, for a few minutes the least.

I was a little bit nervous while I wait for him to answer my call. I also kept on glancing on the doorway, scared that Liz might come in any time. So, I decided to go to the bathroom, locking the door to make sure I was safe from my suspicious friend.

"Baek." I muttered the moment he picked up.

"Hey baby, are you okay? Where are you?" He asked immediately, he sounded really concerned.

I had to pinch my leg to stop myself from giggling because I think I would never get used to him calling me baby.

"Yeah I'm fine. I'm at the hotel right now. I'm sorry I couldn't call or even text you earlier. Liz is everywhere I go and I have to be careful around her or she'll end up knowing about us."

I explained and I got a bit worried when I didn't get any reply from him for a few seconds.

Was he mad at me?

"Damn, this is really driving me crazy." He said exasperatedly and it instantly got me confused.

"W-what's wrong? Are you mad at me?"

I heard him sigh before he started to speak once more.

"No." He paused. "No, of course I'm not mad at you. It's just that I already miss you." He trailed off. "And to think that we're both in Seoul right now but couldn't be together...damn." He added, his voice toned with frustration. "This is nuts."

My heart almost sank because of what he just said. I totally felt the same way but I knew I shouldn't make it too obvious or else he would feel worse about the situation.

"Let's just try to think of a way, okay? I will be here for a few days anyway." I told him hoping to lighten the mood. "I'm pretty sure we could come up of something, right?"

"You're right. There has got to be a way. I'm going to come see you no matter what it takes."

I was thankful he agreed.

"I miss you too." I blurted out before I could even stop myself because hearing his voice was slowly melting my composure.

He chuckled.

"You know you couldn't possibly miss me more than I miss you, right? You'll lose, I swear."

I was laughing at his remark when I heard Liz come in.

"Oh, Liz is here. I gotta go, I'm really sorry. I'll make it up to you, I promise." I told him honestly feeling sorry about hanging up this soon.

"Really?" I could imagine him with a naughty smile on his face as he said it.

"Baekhyun!" I whined in a very low voice.

I struggled not to laugh, afraid to make any noise but he burst out laughing from the other line. I was so sure that his eyes formed into crescents right at that moment with his nose scrunching in the process too. Oh how I love the sight of him laughing.

"Just be safe. Okay?" He said when he stopped laughing.

"Yes sir." I replied smiling as I ended the call as soon as possible because Liz started knocking on the bathroom door.

***

11:15PM

Liz and I were standing at the entrance of bar named "In Between Nights and Music". This was our second bar for tonight. She didn't like the first one because according to her, it was too wild. So, we only stayed there for about an hour. This one was definitely a high class bar based on the exterior. There were two big guys guarding the entrance. And right where we were standing, I could already hear the music and I could imagine how loud it would be inside. I wanted to back out but of course Liz wouldn't let me do that.

It wasn't my first time to be in a place like this because Liz dragged me a few times to these places back in Australia when we were in the University. I didn't like drinking because of my low alcohol tolerance so hard drinks were never an option for me.

When we got in, I noticed that the place was really big. There were two floors. The dance floor occupied a huge space in the middle on the first floor which I must note was already quite crowded. The fancy looking bar counter was located on the right with the Dj booth nestling on the other side. There were two small stairways on both sides leading to the second floor which was all filled with VIP lounges. The lighting was pretty good too. The interior of the club was really good.

"Oh this is so cool! I should commend the interior designer of this place." Liz exclaimed as she admired the place. "Right?"  
"I guess?" I answered and she might have instantly read my mind.  
"Hail, let's have fun okay? Loosen up." She stated. "Look at you, you're very pretty tonight. Guys would for sure die to buy you a drink or dance with you."

Just the thought of it made me cringe.

"I hope no one would." I contradicted.

"Oh my god, you're so annoying. Shut up." She replied rolling her eyes at me.

I laughed at her reaction.

"Let's just go find a place Liz." I suggested.

"Finally, something nice from you." Liz said smiling before dragging me with her.

We found a vacant table on the first floor and Liz immediately ordered a drink. When the waiter came to take order, I reminded her to get me a light one. It had been about fifteen minutes when she already got bored and asked me to go with her to the dance floor.

"Liz, you know I don't dance."

"Liar. Yes, you do. Let's go!" She said ignoring my protest, grabbing my wrist as she took me with her.

The moment we reached the crowd of dancing people, Liz excitedly moved her body with the music. She's a good dancer and this stuff suited her well. As for me, I wasn't really sure. All I knew was that I was feeling guilty. I kept thinking about what Baekhyun would think if he saw this.

"Hey!" Liz shouted as she leaned closer to my ear. "This is called dance floor for a reason. Dance!" She egged on.

She took my hands and let me dance with her for a few seconds. In fact, I did dance with her but not as sensual as she was doing it. I could only stand it for a brief second and was thankful when a cute guy caught Liz's attention. When she turned around to face and dance with him, I took the chance to slip out of the dance floor.

I went to the bar and sat on one of the stools. Then the bartender appeared in front of me and it was obvious that he was waiting for me to give him my order. I told him to get me something light and I was thankful that he it was all the information he needed from me. I roamed my attention around and noticed this particular guy staring at me. He was seated on one of the lounges near the bar and I saw how his eyes searched me from head to toe and I instantly felt nervous. Maybe leaving the dance floor was a bad idea.

When I got the drink from the bartender, I drank it immediately because I got a little tensed. I absolutely didn't like the taste but I had no choice but to swallow it. I could sense that the man was still looking at me so I tried my best not to glance his way.

I fished for my phone from my purse and saw Baekhyun's messages.

Byun:  
Do you mind texting me the name of the bar you're at right now?  
11:53PM

I checked the current time and it said 12:46AM. It's been almost an hour. I hurriedly sent him a reply with the name of the bar.

Byun:  
Are you okay?  
12:47AM

Me:  
Yes Baekhyun, I am fine. But why are you still awake?  
12:48AM

Byun:  
How could I sleep when my girl is out somewhere surrounded by so many guys?  
12:49AM

I suddenly felt guilty. I knew this was a bad idea and he didn't like it. However, he knew that Liz was my friend and we haven't really seen each other for quite a while so he agreed.

Me:  
I'm sorry.  
12:50AM

Byun:  
It's okay. Will you text me when you get home?  
12:51AM

Me:  
Of course. I know you're tired. Try to go to sleep now Baek.  
12:53AM

Byun:  
I'll see you soon.  
12:54AM

I momentarily thought about his reply and thought that maybe he'd come over but that would be absurd because I was certain he wouldn't do that. He shouldn't be seen here. Especially in places like these. So, I dismissed that crazy idea immediately. He probably meant we would see each other one of these days. Though, I didn't really know if that was possible.

Liz found me after a few more minutes. She was trying to fix her hair while she walked towards me. She also had a naughty look on her face.

"Did something happen with you and that cute guy?" I asked trying to tease her.

She smiled really big. "Well, you could say that." She said before laughing.

"Oh my gosh! But what about the guy you met two weeks ago?"

"Shut up Park! I told you I didn't like him." She scolded.

"Okay fine." I said laughing at her.

"Anyway, let's go drink more. I'm thirsty."

"Where is he now? I mean the guy from the dance floor."

"Uh, he went back to his friends too when I told him I had to check on my granny friend."

I slapped her arm. "You're so mean."

She ordered while I made my way to the restroom. When I got inside, I immediately checked myself in the mirror. I brushed my hair using my fingers. I had the bottom part of my long hair curled and I was glad that they still look somehow decent. Then I noticed that my face was already a little bit red because of the alcohol. I only drank three shots and it was not that much. I could drink one more shot and that would be it. I'd stop because that would be my limit.

When I came back to the bar, Liz handed me my drink. She already finished her shot and had her eyes on the dance floor probably searching for the guy she had a moment with a while ago. I took my phone out from my purse to check if I had unread messages but there was none.

"Who were you texting by the way?" She asked out of nowhere.

"What?" I was taken aback with her question that I drank my drink all at once. "No one." I added as I put my phone on the bar rail.

"I saw you a while ago, you were smiling while you were texting."

"I was watching a funny advertisement."

"Liar." She smirked. "You're hiding something from me Park."

I just looked at her unable to come up with a good rebuttal.

"I'll get you to spill it you'll see."

***

We were both seated on the bar stools when I started to feel a little bit dizzy. I lifted a hand to my head as I tried to steady my focus. When I looked at the dance floor, the crazy movements made me want to throw up.

Am I drunk?

As far as I know I didn't drink that much. So, it kind of made me wonder how I was this tipsy already.

"Liz, what did you make me drink?" I asked in a very loud way so she would hear me amidst the crazy noise.

"I'm sorry I might have mistakenly given you what I ordered." She said nonchalantly as she continued to sip her drink.

"What?!" I exclaimed knowing how she really prefer the hard ones since her tolerance was exceptional. "Are you crazy?!" I snapped glaring at her.

"I said I'm sorry Hail. It was a mistake." She apologized but she didn't look sorry at all. It got me thinking that maybe she did it on purpose to get me to spill the beans.

"My god Liz, did you do it so you could interrogate me?" I told her and I might have looked and sounded angry.

"What the hell?" She snapped, her eyes wide. "I said it was a mistake. I didn't mean it. If I had known I wouldn't have given it to you." She retorted.

I looked at her unbelievably. Seriously, how could she be the one pissed right now? But then again, it must have been the alcohol. So, instead of talking back, I chose to shut my mouth or we'd end up at each other's throat.

I dislike being drunk because of this feeling. I leaned closer to the counter, resting my head down the bar rail as the dizziness grew and the loud music was making it worse. And even with my eyes closed, everything seemed to spin around.

I was trying my best to keep my composure at that time because I knew I was angry. I was also so focused on what was happening to me, then I suddenly heard Liz talking.

"Why are you calling her? Are you her boyfriend or something? Because if not, then stop. She's trying to have fun..."

I instantly got a bad feeling about it so I opened my eyes and immediately looked her way. And to my horror, she was talking on the phone and I was a hundred percent sure that it wasn't hers. It was mine. My phone.

She was talking to someone on my phone. I swallowed hard.

Noticing that I was already staring at her, she looked back at me.

"And oh, in case you wanna know she's all tipsy and drunk now. She couldn't even answer her phone." She said with a very firm tone as she glared at me before ending the call.

My jaw dropped in disbelief as she put my phone back on the counter. I hastily grabbed my phone to check who she was talking to.

"Oh god." I muttered when I found out that it was Baekhyun who called.

My face started to heat up as my heartbeat raced. The last thing I wanted to happen was for Baekhyun to know about this.

"What did you just do?" I asked her in gritted teeth.

"You heard it, I just told whoever that was to stop calling because you're trying to have fun." She explained dryly as she crossed her arms in front of her chest.

My anger was quickly building up inside me and I was so tempted to yell at her right now but I knew that I'd regret it later so I ended up pressing my lips together.

"Why? Was that your boyfriend? Because if he was then...oops!" She sarcastically.

I let out of a sigh as I stood to face her.

"You know what? I'm gonna go get some fresh air." I said not even looking at her.

I didn't wait for her response anymore as I turned around and struggled on my way out. I tried to walk straight but the spinning just wouldn't go away so I ended up bumping against a guy.

"I'm sorry." I apologized as I went on but the man grabbed my arm.

I immediately looked the man's direction. My heart started to race when I recognized that he was the same man who was staring at me a while ago.

"Hey beautiful, leaving already?" He asked with a cocky smile on his face as he stepped closer to me.

I was right he was drunk as he reeked of alcohol. I felt like throwing up right at the moment. So, I used every ounce of energy I had to free from him and when I did, I hurriedly walked away.

I was panting when I finally got out of the bar. My hands were clammy and shaking because I got really scared back there. I looked around and found the streets still a bit crowded with groups of people. I walked towards the alley next to the bar and found it empty so I decided to stay there to calm myself down. The alleyway was kind of spacious and there were some cars parked a few meters away from where I was standing. The cars seemed unoccupied so I didn't bother anymore.

I made a few steps closer to the wall as I leaned my back against it. My head was aching and my legs were tired because of the stilettos I was wearing.

"Gosh, I just want to go home." I muttered as I covered my face with my both hands.

It was after a few more minutes when I remembered that Liz talked to Baekhyun a while ago. I was still holding my phone so I instantly unlocked it. I went to my messages and tapped on his name but then I ended up looking at the screen without typing anything because aside from the fact that I might not text him properly, I didn't really know what to tell him. I couldn't think of an excuse for all of these. So, I ended up locking my phone, shoving it inside my purse.

I spent a few moments contemplating before I decided to take a cab to go back to the hotel. I didn't want to leave Liz but I wouldn't be able to survive another minute inside the bar. It was suffocating inside.

I was about to leave my spot, which was a few meters from the main road, when someone grabbed my wrist. I jerked when I saw the same guy. My heartbeat started to race again because there was no one near that I could ask for help.

Oh god.

"What are you doing here alone beautiful?" He asked as he pulled me closer to him. "Don't you know that it's dangerous for a beauty like yours to be all alone in this dark spot?"

"Let me go!" I demanded as I tried to free from him again but his grip was so tight, it even hurt.

"Not gonna happen." He muttered. "Not this time." He added smirking as he lifted a hand to touch my face but I tilted my head away to avoid the contact.

I glared at him.

The truth was, right at that moment, I felt like passing out because of the throbbing pain in my head but I knew I had to fight it or else something really bad might happen to me.

"Why don't we have a deal babe?"

I looked at him because I couldn't really come up with a reply. I was trying to keep a straight face when everything inside me was already crumbling.

"How about you stop glaring at me and we go back inside? Let's have fun together." He proposed, his eyes were piercing. "Or we could go somewhere else and have a different kind of fun." He ended his statement by licking his lips. "I prefer the latter one of course."

I almost threw up.

Gosh. His words sent me shivers. So, without thinking it through, I slapped him with my free hand. He was taken aback with what I did so I took the opportunity to push him away from me.

He glared at me as he lifted a hand on the cheek I just slapped.

"I was talking to you nicely, you know that right?" He said obviously threatening me. "You didn't have to make things this hard babe." He added as he immediately walked towards me and grabbed my arms, pushing me until my back hit the wall. I flinched because of the pain. He was also holding my arms tightly and that his nails were digging into my skin.

"You're going to regret slapping me." He told me angrily that I was not able to open my mouth to respond.

I already felt like crying. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even think properly.

"You didn't have to play hard to get." He said in gritted teeth as he leaned his head closer to me.

"Please-" I muttered as I was about to beg him to let me go but I was cut when I saw another man stood next to us.

We both looked at him. He was wearing a bucket hat and I didn't have to even look twice to confirm who he was.

It was Baekhyun.

What he was doing here, I didn't really know.

I held my breath as I continued to stare at him while he, on the other hand, glared at the man. I saw how his jaw clenched. I was so scared but I was trying my best not to shed any tear a while ago but the moment I saw him, I couldn't help but cry. My tears easily rolled down my cheeks as I bite my lips and tried my hardest not to sob.

"Let her go." He demanded with a controlled voice, his eyes never left the man.

"Why would I listen to you?" I heard the man say sounding really pissed as he tightened his grip on my arms and it made me flinch.

"I said get your hands off her." Baekhyun demanded once more and it was obvious that he was trying to hold back.

"You know what? F*ck you!" The man growled as he pushed me away from the wall to the ground.

It was impossible to keep my balance so instantly landed on the ground and I winced. When I looked up, I saw Baekhyun staring at me with his hands clenched before he walked to the man and hit him directly on the face. When he faced Baekhyun again, his eyes were burning with rage as he attempted to punch Baekhyun but he was able to dodge and avoid it. The man must've put a lot of weight on his fist that due to the missed attack, his body almost hit the ground next to me. Since I had access to his face, I saw how he looked more triggered that I literally heard him growl before he turned to face Baekhyun again.

What happened next made me gasp and hold my breath, momentarily forgetting about all the kinds of pain I was currently feeling. Baekhyun didn't give him the chance to come closer to him as he spun his body before releasing a high kick with his foot landing on the man's chest. His kick immediately sent him to the ground. I was dumbfounded, I couldn't speak. I first looked at the man's struggling figure next to me then to Baekhyun who still looked furious. I saw him took a deep breath before he walked towards me. He looked at me from head to toe for a brief second as if he was making sure that I wasn't hurt before he helped me get up.

"Are you okay?" He asked as he cupped my face with his both hands, his eyes meeting mine.

I somehow managed to nod despite my body trembling. And being this close to him right now, I wanted to be inside his arms and cry so hard. I was so scared. I was so scared.

"I told you to be safe." He said in gritted teeth, his facial expression changing from concern to anger.

We might have been too focused on each other for a bit that we didn't notice that the man was already up on his feet.

"You piece of shit!" The man shouted out of nowhere as he grabbed Baekhyun and punched him on the face.

The impact might have been too much that the hat Baekhyun was wearing fell on the ground. It all happened so fast and I froze. I saw the appearance of blood on Baekhyun's lower lip when he faced the man once more. I was already so worried and it doubled when I realized that without the hat, his face was exposed. The alley wasn't well lighted but it wasn't too dark either.

Panicked, I looked at the man who was already staring at Baekhyun's exposed face. He looked like he was trying to figure something out. Did he know him? Did he recognize him? Oh god, please let the man be too drunk to recognize him.

However, Baekhyun didn't seem to mind the thought of him being recognized. He looked more pissed now as he walked towards the other guy. They exchanged punches for I didn't know how long. I was too shocked that I all I could do was watch. My head was still throbbing and the dizziness had become worse.

"Please Stop!" I managed to say but none of them stopped.

I looked around but there was no one but if there happened to be someone near, I couldn't simply just ask for help given Baekhyun's celebrity status. It would be messy for him. Damn, I was going to crazy.

I couldn't think anymore. No, the truth was, I chose not to think anymore. When I saw Baekhyun punched the guy sending him to the ground again, I ran towards Baekhyun. I instantly hugged him from behind as I tightly wrapped my arms around him. The first thing he did was try to remove my hands off but I refused and hugged him even tighter.

"Stop, please." I begged, my voice shaking. "Baekhyun please." I added, my voice above a whisper.

I felt how his body stiffened the moment I started sobbing. I was crying because I couldn't stand seeing him like this because of me. This was not him. He shouldn't be doing this.

"Just get me out of here." I struggled to in a muffled voice. "Please."

I felt his body turn so I loosened my arms around him. Right then, I was able to catch a glimpse of the other guy who was still struggling to get up. Baekhyun was panting, his hair was almost wet because of sweat. Then I instantly noticed the bruises on his face. It broke my heart.

He lifted his hands to my face as he wiped my tears with his thumbs. He looked at me for few moments before letting me go as he went to pick up his hat and wore it. When he went back, he grabbed my hand as we both made our way out of the alleyway.

When we passed next to the entrance of the bar, I saw how Baekhyun tilted his head down as his grip on my hand tightened. So, I moved closer to him to at least give him cover. And though there weren't that much people now, we had never been to a public place like this together and this was totally nerve wracking.

I was so thankful that nobody seemed to notice us when we passed by the entrance of the bar only to hold my breath again when I heard a familiar voice.

"Hailey! Where are you going?"

I knew it was Liz but I didn't glance at her. Instead, I looked at Baekhyun who slowed down totally aware that I was being called. He looked back at me and somehow he seemed to understand what I wanted to do. We both continued to walk towards his car.

"Hey!" She called once more. "Seriously Park?!"

I was a hundred percent sure that she would hate me for this but I couldn't risk Baekhyun. We got inside as soon as we reached his car, which I must note was a different car. It was a silver one this time. Baekhyun immediately revved the engine on and drove away from the place. He drove for a few minutes before he stopped inside the empty tunnel.

We both sat there in silence. I didn't know what to say. Everything was so messed up. I turned to him who had his head leaned on the seat with his eyes closed. This was all my fault. And this realization made me want to cry. And maybe to make things harder for me, my phone rang. It was Liz. I felt Baekhyun's eyes on me as I answered the call.

I listened to her rant the moment I picked up. She was so angry and she asked me too many questions all at once that it made my head throb again.

"Liz. I'm sorry. I promise I'll explain to you everything. Please go home safe. I'm sorry." I said before hanging up without giving her the chance to talk anymore.

I kept quiet for a few seconds before I heard Baekhyun talk.

"This is not how I imagined us together in Seoul." He said with evident frustration in his voice.

I was so stressed, tired and my eyes were starting to feel heavy. I felt different kinds of pain all over my body. But above all else, I felt like breaking down. And I only had to look at Baekhyun who was already staring at me to finally give in to tears.

"I'm...sorry this ... this is all... my ....fault." I struggled to say between my sobbing.

"Hey..." Baekhyun muttered as he held my hand. "Don't do this."

"You got into a fight because of me. You got hurt because of me. That guy saw your face because of me and who knows you might get into trouble because of me." I couldn't stop myself from blurting those things because I was so guilty and the alcohol in my body was making everything worse.

"Hey baby, stop." He said as he leaned closer and lifted a hand to tuck my hair behind my ear. "Look at me."

I was hesitant but I turned to face him.

"I will sure get into any fight for you."

"What if he recognized you?"

"He won't."

"Are you sure?" I asked because I knew he wasn't sure. He was just saying it for me to feel better.

He smiled as he brushed a finger against my cheek. His skin was so smooth, it helped me to calm down a bit. I ended up closing my eyes.

"Didn't I tell you not too be too pretty?"

My eyes flew opened when I heard him. I instantly met his eyes. I got so conscious, I blushed.

"Did someone buy you a drink?" He asked as he leaned his face closer to mine that I was already pressed against the chair.

I nodded.

His forehead creased.

"Liz bought drinks for me. She even gave me a hard one by mistake-"

"Hard drink?" He said, his voice sounding raspy all of a sudden. "I see you've been a very bad girl." He added as his eyes moved their attention to my lips.

I swallowed hard as my heartbeat raced.

A lopsided smile crossed his face. His lips lingered over mine for a brief second before he closed the remaining space between the two of us. I already know that he's got the softest lips but I still get surprised all the time. The kiss was great, so good it seemed to lull me to sleep.

His lips were the last thing I remembered.

 

~♥~


	14. Fourteen

Fourteen

 

~♥~ 

 

I was dreaming.

I opened my eyes and was immediately welcomed by Baekhyun’s face. He was gazing at me with evident fondness in his eyes. He was beautiful like he had always been. I wanted to look and appreciate every inch of his face but my eyes were still too heavy. I felt so tired and I was desperate for more sleep. So, before I knew it, I gave in and closed my eyes once more.

“Good morning baby.” He whispered and his voice sounded so good in the morning. It was like a melody causing my lips to curve into a smile.

“Morning.” I muttered with my eyes closed.

I felt his fingers tuck my hair behind my ear and I had to confess that everytime he did that, I get the need to be inside his arms. And since this was a dream, I might as well forget about being shy around him. So, without bothering to open my eyes, I moved closer to him until my face was resting on his chest. I also nestled my arm around his waist as I comfortably snuggle against him. I had a feeling he was startled by my unexpected act that it took a few more seconds before I felt him hug me. His fingers played with my hair as he started humming.

Ah, this dream was so good.   

I could smell his scent, hear his heartbeat, feel him breathing next to me and gosh…he felt so warm as always. The kind of warmth that I only get by being this close to him. It was like sitting in front of the fireplace in wintertime. It was comforting, it was satisfying. And I’d have to conclude that this has got to be one of the best things in the world. This moment even felt better than watching the sunset or gazing at the stars. Right now, it didn’t feel like he was the famous Byun Baekhyun that everyone adored. He was just being my boyfriend. My Baekhyun.

This dream was so perfect and I would do just anything just to make this it last longer.

 

***

 

It was that familiar throbbing pain in my head that burst my private bubble. There were also several kinds of pain emanating from the different parts of my body. I winced as they had resurfaced all of a sudden.

Oh god! Last night.

Scenes from what happened the night before flooded my thoughts, causing me to open my eyes instantly.  

Baekhyun.

His face was the first thing I saw. He had his eyes closed and I couldn’t help but notice the dark bruises on his face. One right under the corner of his lips, the other one was right above his right cheek. I suddenly felt bad and nervous at the same time as I recalled the fight that happened between him and the guy from the bar.

Wait.

Baekhyun and I were on the same bed. We were cuddling like what we were exactly doing in my dream. How could this happen? I was still dreaming, wasn’t I? I pressed my eyes closed for a second before opening them again hoping that the scenario would change. However, everything stayed the same. Baekhyun was still here. I was in a room with my boyfriend and I couldn’t remember how I got here.

Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.

I rattled in silence or maybe not too silent that he noticed me. He slowly opened his eyes and right when he looked at me, panic has fully taken over my entire body. I pushed him away, maybe even kicking him in the process, sending him off the bed.

There was a loud thud before his groan filled the entire room as he fell on the floor. I sat up, my hands covering my mouth. I couldn’t really see him because I remained frozen like a statue.

I was really in the same room with him. This realization kept replaying in my mind. 

“Was that…really ne..cessary?” He asked in muffled voice. “I think I’ve…broken a…bone.”  

Baekhyun groaned from the floor once more and it was just then I was able snap out of my own thoughts. I kicked him off the bed and he fell on floor. It must’ve hurt. I hesitantly left my spot without leaving the bed. I bent to take a peek with my arms resting on the edge of the bed.

“A-are you okay?” I asked him nervously as I saw him curling in pain.

His eyes were closed and he looked like he was really hurt.

I got worried.

“Baek-” I wasn’t able to finish my statement when he, without warning, grabbed my wrist and pulled me down. My heart almost skipped a beat when I fell from the bed, shrieking in the process, and landed on top of him.

We both winced on the impact but met each other’s gaze right after. Our faces were so close to each other, the tip of his nose barely touching mine and I felt his hands meet at the small of my back. I was flustered with the position that we’re in right now so I tried to free myself from him but he tightened his hold around my waist.

“Baekhyun…let me get up.”  

“No.” He muttered. “You’re not going anywhere just yet.”

I couldn’t come up with a decent reply after hearing his words. This man really knew how to use his words because right at that instant, I stopped struggling to break free. I looked at him again and saw how his beautiful lips formed into a small smile.

“Do you remember the first we were like this?” He asked.

His question sent my thoughts back to the first time we met up at the old hiking place. Back when I didn’t know who he was. When we were still both complete strangers to each other. When all I knew about him was the fact that he was just the guy wearing a black bucket hat.

I momentarily looked away from him since I could feel my face heating slowly.

“Are you aware that you’re blushing right now?” He asked once more. “You have to know that my self-control gets so weak when you blush.”

His voice, gosh his bedroom voice sounded so sexy, I was scared to look at him again. My heart was probably beating so hard and there was a high possibility that he could hear and feel it pounding. I knew that I should’ve gotten used to moments like these with him but no, my heart and my body reacted the same way almost everytime. Then I felt his hands move up to my back as he pulled me closer into a gentle hug.

“I wish all my mornings have you in it.” He said right next to my ear.

I relaxed inside his arms. In fact, I smiled at his statement because I secretly hoped for the same thing. I would’ve loved waking up with his presence every single day. We stayed that way for about a few minutes more without any words coming from any of us.

“By the way…” He said as he tightened his arms around me, finally breaking the silence. “You look really good in my shirt.” He added and I could almost hear a playful smile in his voice.

In his shirt?

“What?!” I blurted out.

My body twitched before I was able to successfully free myself from him. I moved and stepped away so fast that I was already standing in front of him. I looked down at what I was wearing. He was right, I was indeed wearing his shirt. It was a loose white shirt and it was quite big for me that it covered half of my thighs, the sleeves were right above my elbows.

“W-why am I wearing your shirt Baekhyun?” I asked him right away as he was getting up.

He didn’t answer, he looked at me with his forehead creasing instead. I also realized that he was also wearing a white shirt paired with blue-ish plaid pajamas, barefoot. His hair was sticking up in all directions.

How was it possible for this man look so hot in those? No, actually scrap that because that was totally unnecessary right now.

“Where are my clothes?” I looked around and it was just then I noticed where I was.

The room was spacious and as I roamed my attention around, I found the interior to be really good. However, I was not in the right state nor this was the right time to pay attention to the details of the room we’re at. But then a particular huge photo on the wall caught my attention. It was Baekhyun’s. It was a close up photo that showcased his breathtaking side profile. He looked genuinely happy with a smile that reached his eyes. The photo was probably taken during one of his concerts because around him was the beautiful lavender-ish ocean. I would’ve admired it more if Baekhyun didn’t interrupt me by shooting a question.  

“You don’t remember anything, do you?”

The chaos in my mind suddenly vanished. I stopped thinking. I swallowed. Hard. I just looked back at him because that was the only thing I could do right at the very moment.

“You didn’t remember how…” He trailed off to show off a crazy smile. “How the two of us…”

“How the two of us, WHAT?” I asked him and I was surprised just how I was able to come up with words.

“No, nevermind. You can’t even remember it anyway.” He said as he shook his head sideways and I swore I saw him grinning before he turned away.

My mouth fell open in disbelief. Was he serious? He was just going to turn away and let me overthink about what really happened last night. No, he’s not going to torture me like this. I wouldn’t stand not knowing anything.

“Baekhyun!” I called but he ignored me.

The next thing I knew I was stomping as I tail right behind him while he opened a giant closet. He bent, probably trying to find something inside and I totally didn’t appreciate him purposely refusing to acknowledge my presence. So, I had no choice but to grab his arm.

“Hey you can’t just-” My attempt to whine failed and was cut when he also grabbed my other arm, shoving me inside the closet. “Leave…me…hanging…just like that.” I added sounding like a child trying to learn alphabet while I had my entire body pressed against his clothes.

He smirked just before he shook his head to get rid of the hair covering his eyes since he was using his both hands to hold me. And my startled self could only stare at him, my both hands were pinned on my sides. His beautiful dark brown irises were boring into me, leaving me breathless.

“Shall I help you remember?” He whispered right before he leaned closer to me, causing my face to be buried deeper into his clothes.

As if everything was in slow motion, I nervously watched his face drew more close to mine. His handsome face, yes even with the bruises, filled my entire vision until I couldn’t anymore because his warm lips had invaded mine. And I couldn’t help but close my eyes due to the tenderness of his kiss. My heart started to beat wildly as my clammy hands formed into fists. Then I felt his fingers grazed down my arm before he brought them to the curve of my waist.

In just a matter of seconds, I was lost in his kisses. It was the kind of getting lost that was truly satisfying. Actually, it’s the kind of being lost that was more like being found, if that made sense. I slowly lifted my hands as I clung to him by wrapping them around his neck. He made a step forward taking the both of us inside the closet. Without breaking the kiss, he shoved the hanged clothes to either sides so we could have more space to ourselves. After taking care of the clothes, his hands were now gently holding my neck, tilting my head up for a better access. The kiss gradually intensified and I couldn’t help but to acknowledge that sinking feeling it was giving me. His kisses always seemed to leave me defenseless, kicking all other thoughts out of my head.

We were both slightly panting when he finally lifted his lips from mine, he tilted my head down and planted a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose. He then, leaned his forehead against mine with his eyes closed.

“God, I’m so in love with you. It’s crazy.” He murmured.

I was speechless so I didn’t dare open my mouth to speak anymore. I wanted to cry because for some reasons, I could sense the sincerity in his words. His statement made my heart warm and I was so overwhelmed with everything. First, the kiss, which I had to note happened in the freaking closet, and now his words. And I couldn’t help but wonder how all of these were real.  Did I save a country in my past life? What did I do to deserve this man?

He must’ve figured out that he got me speechless so he pulled me closer into a tight hug instead.

“Do you remember it now?” He asked while I was still inside his arms.

I pulled away a bit to look at him. I tried to think and dig my thoughts to remember anything that happened last night after the fight.

Liz. The scene where she was calling me right outside bar flashed before me.

“Liz, she saw us. I have to go call her. Oh my god.” I said as I tried to break free from him but then he refused to let me go.

“What else do you remember?” He asked once more, looking me in the eye.

“Uh…we got in your car.” I trailed off to force myself to recall things after that.

“And?”

I bit my lower lip as I darted my attention on the floor. I remembered myself crying, him comforting me afterwards and then us kissing-

I gasped, my hands covering my mouth as I looked at him.

“So…” He muttered egging me on to tell him what I just recalled.

“We were kissing…and…”

“And?”

“And I fell asleep?”

He looked at me with his cute subtle pout taking over his mouth. I knew he was faking his “hurt look” right now and I had to try my best not to laugh at him.

“I’m sorry?” I apologized as I tried to pout just a little. Just a little.

He laughed out loud and I swore his laugh literally sounded like HA HA HA.

“I’m only going to forgive you for passing out on me...” He paused while his eyes narrowed. “While I was kissing you,” he added as he lifted a finger on my lips, his eyes following his touch. “Because I love you.”

Butterflies filled my stomach as he planted a peck on my lips. He appeared really amused when I looked at him again. I figured it must be because of the slight surprise painted all over my face. It was one thing hearing him telling me that he likes me but it was totally a different thing hearing an ‘I love you’ from him. My heart was melting warmly like chocolate under the heat of the summer sun. Yes, Byun Baekhyun was my sun.

“Baekhyun…” His name was all that I could muster.

He didn’t wait for my next words as he pulled me into another gentle hug before taking us both out of the closet.

“I fell asleep… so nothing happened right?” I asked him and I was really hoping he’d say yes but he just smiled and turned to walk to another closet and started to fish for something inside.

I stood and waited for him only to feel conscious when I looked down and realized that I was still just wearing his shirt.

I woke up wearing his shirt, it only meant one thing. Someone took my clothes off. This thought hit me like a bucket of cold water. Yes, I was still wearing my undergarments but I was still bothered. I needed to ask him.

“Baek?” I called.

“Yes baby?” He replied without looking at me, his attention fixed on what he was looking for.

“Who undressed me?” I tried my best not to be too obvious that I was feeling a bit antsy about it.

I saw him stop whatever he was doing for a brief second before turning to me, catching me pulling the hem of his shirt down to cover my legs.

“Let’s leave that a mystery for now, shall we?” He said as he winked at me.

His answer accompanied by the playful expression on his face made me blush straightaway. I wanted to ask him again but when I opened my mouth to start talking once more, he must’ve found what he was looking for and started to walk towards me. 

“Here.” He muttered, handing me a pair of plain gray pajamas. “That’s the smallest I could find.”

“But where are my clothes?” I asked him instead of taking the pajamas from him.

“Please Park Hae Won, wear these before I totally lose my mind and do what I have been meaning to do with you.” The seriousness in his voice as well as on his face sent me shivers.

I immediately took the pajamas from him before leaving him as I made hasty steps out to find the bathroom.

 

***

I was standing in front of the mirror as I remembered how our lips locked in the closet. Never in my life, I thought that something like that would happen to me, especially not in the closet. Not to mention, in his place.

Then all the things that I had to mind came flooding in my thoughts. Reality knocked as I started to think about Liz and what I would have to say to her. She must be really mad at me right now.

What time is it? I roamed my attention around and found a clock that said 10:43 in the morning. I definitely have to figure things out and start praying that everything would be fine after what happened last night.  

I got out of the bathroom and found Baekhyun talking to someone on the phone while he was sitting on the edge of his bed. Even though I couldn’t see his face, I could somehow sense that something was not right. I walked a few steps closer and that was when I was able to make out of the words he was saying. I know eavesdropping was bad but it’s also not right for me to be clueless right now.

“I know. I was really supposed to call him today about what happened last night…” He paused for a bit. “No, I haven’t seen any pictures yet…how bad is it?” Another pause. “Ahhh damn it.” He cursed with a low voice. “No, my phone was on silent I didn’t know they’ve been calling me. They also sent me messages and I just saw them now.” He raked his hair with his free hand followed by tilting his head down. “Yeah, I know… Okay. I guess they’ll be here any moment from now. Okay, thanks Kyungsoo.”

I froze on my feet. Was it about last night?

After putting his phone down on his bed, he lifted both of his hands to his head. I was certain something was wrong. And I wasn’t sure if I was brave enough to ask him about it. Would I be able to handle the answer to my question? My heart started to beat wildly again as I walked closer and stopped in front of him.

“Baekhyun…” I uttered to catch his attention.

He slowly lifted his head to he looked at me.

“Is there something wrong?” I couldn’t help but ask.

He smiled but I knew that he only did it to cover something up.

“Do you love me?” He asked all of a sudden as he stretched his arms to reach for my hands.

I was so surprised I wasn’t able to answer immediately. Since no words came out of my mouth, the expression on his face changed. He looked sad.

“Yes.” I answered, squeezing his hands.

He had his eyes up on me again right after hearing my answer. The corner of his lips rose as his eyes somehow twinkled.

“Then can you say it?” He spread his legs as he pulled me closer to him with his hands now placed at the small of my back. “Can you tell me you love me now?” There was gentleness in his tone as he pleaded with the softest facial expression I’ve ever seen from him.

Honestly, how can I not love him?

“I love you.”

I saw his face lit up before he hugged me by the waist, his head resting on my stomach.

“I love you.” His voice wasn’t clear when he said it but it didn’t stop my strawberry face from showing up.

He broke the hug only to pull me to sit on his lap before staring at me. All he did was look at me in silence for a few moments. Worry was written all over his face and I knew he wanted to tell me something but he ended up looking away.

“Baek?” I lifted a hand to his cheek as I made him face me again.

I was hesitant to ask him but I had to assure him that he wasn’t going to deal with it alone.

“Are we in trouble?” My voice was gentle despite the panic that was slowly already taking over me.

I got a hesitant nod from him as response and it was enough to make my heart sink. The first thing I did was to blame myself. Watching how he looked so troubled right now, with the bruises on his face…I couldn’t help but feel remorseful.

“I’m sorry baby.” He broke my silence by his apology.

How could he even be the one saying sorry right now? I was out of words while I was trying to suppress the tears that were already forming in my eyes.

“Will you promise me one thing?” He squeezed my hand before intertwining his fingers with mine. 

I gazed at him as I wait for his next words.

“Please promise me you’re not letting my hand go.”

 

~♥~ 

AN: Yes, you read the name right. Kyungsoo's here! I've been seeing a lot of Baeksoo content lately and I love their friendship so much I couldn't resist but cast Kyungsoo here. Anyway, More fluff for you guys before...


	15. Fifteen

Fifteen  
  
  
  
~♥~ 

 

_“Promise me you’re not letting my hand go.”_

My attention darted to our entangled fingers before I looked up to meet his eyes once more. There was an absolute concern in his eyes and it was making me more worried.

“What happened?” It was all that I could muster, trying to steady my voice.

He shook his head to get rid of the hair blocking his eyes for a moment, bit his lower lip while he looked at me intently. It seemed like he was contemplating and when he sighed, I figured that he eventually made up his mind to tell me.

“It turned out someone recognized me last night and took pictures of us together..." He paused to take a deep breath as he looked away. "Kyungsoo told me that they're all over the internet."

The news made my blood run cold.

"What?" It was the only word that I could come up with as I unconsciously detached my hands from him.

I absent mindedly stood and stepped away from him. I knew something was wrong but I didn't think that it would be this big. I suddenly felt scared, I couldn't even look at him. I knew my reaction was making him uncomfortable but I couldn't help but be anxious because of what I just heard. I absolutely didn't know how to handle any of these.

"I'm sorry to drag you into this mess." He apologized, making me snap out of my own thoughts.

He was now standing in front of me. He attempted to hold me by lifting his hands to hold my arms but ended up dismissing the thought by moving away from me instead. I, on the other hand, still couldn't come up with a response. My brain was too busy trying to think of possible scenarios of what could possibly happen next. I was panicking inside, my fingers slightly trembling.

He was a few steps from me, facing the other way. He brought his hands to his waist, his head moving sideways. I couldn’t see his reaction but I was pretty sure he was having a hard time.  

"Damn it!" He hissed before he eventually turned to face me again.

The look on his face sent me shivers. He looked frustrated and pained at the same time. I knew he needed me to run to him right now and tell him stuff that would make him feel better but I couldn't bring myself to do that. I was too shocked, I couldn't even cry. I darted my attention to my feet because I couldn’t stand seeing him in this state.

"This is all new to you and things like these shouldn't happen to you. So, I will totally understand if..." He trailed off and just when I had the courage to meet his eyes, he blinked a couple of times.

_He wasn't going to cry, was he?_

"If...you leave." He added, avoiding my eyes once more.

_That hurt. Just the thought of it, hurt._ I suddenly felt a lump in my throat and it took every ounce of energy I have to move closer to him but he walked towards the bed right at the exact moment to grab his phone.

"I'm gonna go make a phone call.” He said, his back on me. “I'll ask someone to take you to your hotel." He added and it was obvious that he was avoiding eye contact.  
  
I gulped as I watched him get out of the room. Right when the door closed behind him, my knees were about to give up. I walked towards the bed to sit or else I’d end up on the floor. The first thing I did was to take a deep breath because I felt suffocated. I didn't know where to start or what was I doing exactly being alone in his room right now.

I glanced at his portrait, the one that I was admiring earlier this morning and felt my heart sank instantly.

_What’s going to happen after this?_

Do I really have the heart to leave him? Should I even be entertaining these thoughts right now? His downcast expression as he left the room was too much for me to bear and to think that this happened right after I told him that I love him...

"I love him..." I muttered, everything hitting me at once. “I love him.”

Memories of his smiles and his laughs flooded my thoughts. The hiking place. The first time he held my hands. The first time he got so jealous because he saw me with Eun Chan. The moment he confessed and told me that he wanted to be my boyfriend. The time when he drove to my aunt’s place in the middle of the night, just to take me stargazing. Our first kiss, and the kiss after that, and the one after… His warm embrace. The way he made me feel. Him. All of him.  

_God, what was I thinking?_ I was so stupid to even make him think that I would just leave him.

So, without wasting time, I got off the bed and dashed out of the room as fast as I could to find him. A long hallway welcomed me as I closed the bedroom door behind me. There were several photos on either walls. They were all his and I’d love to admire each of them but that was not a priority right now.

The long hallway eventually led to a flight of stairs with glass railings leading to the first floor where the spacious living room was located. There was a tall and huge glass wall that revealed a beautiful landscape with the swimming pool on the opposite side. He was standing right before it so I cautiously made my way down the stairs.

He was talking on the phone but had ended the call the moment I reached bottom of the stairs. I didn't move and watch him as he sat on the couch. For a second, I thought he was spacing out when stopped moving and just stared at the table in front of him.  

My heart sank with this sight of him right now. There must be a lot going on in his head and I was so sure my reaction a while ago made him feel worse. I wanted to call him but my stupid self couldn't even do it because I already felt like crying. No, actually tears were already pooling my eyes and they would fall any moment from now. I looked up to somehow stop them from falling and when I turned to him again, I found him already staring at me.

We both gazed at each other without words. None of us dared to move too. He was just looking straight at me with a sad but soft expression on his face.

I didn't know what was going on inside his mind while his eyes bore into me just like I didn't have any idea what was going on inside my head either. All I knew was that I needed to tell him that I wasn't going to leave him.

Our connection was broken by a doorbell. We both turned to where the sound came from. He stood and looked at me for a brief moment before leaving to get the door.

I stayed on the same spot, unmoving. I listened to the pounding behind my chest as I grew anxious of the thought of him having visitors.

"Until when are you planning to ignore us!?" It was an angry woman’s voice.

It was all that I needed to hear to leave and climb up the stairs. I made hasty steps and was thankful enough to reach the second floor right on time before his visitors went to the living room. I hid behind the wall and I was slightly panting. My heart was beating wildly now so I took my hands to my chest, trying to calm myself down.

I was busy doing it when I almost jumped on my feet the moment I heard someone yelled downstairs.  

"Were you out of your mind?!" It was the same voice from the door. "What were you doing in that place and why were you with that girl?”

I slowly leaned to take a peek at them from where I was hiding. There were three people in the living room including Baekhyun. There was a strict looking woman who seemed to be in her late thirties. She was wearing a navy blue blazer on top of a beige blouse paired with a matching navy blue slacks. Her heels clicking as she walked toe and fro. I assumed she must be Kim Eun Hye, Baekhyun's publicist, since he mentioned it to me one time and the way he described her was exactly the way she looked right now.  
  
There was also a man who seemed to be younger than her but was obviously older than Baekhyun. He was dressed casually unlike the woman. He was wearing jeans, a white button down top with a bomber jacket on top of it and sneakers. The man must be his manager, Kang Hyun Seok. He was taller than Baekhyun. I knew Baekhyun liked and trusted Manager Kang so much. He was very hands on with his schedule.  
  
“And look at your face!” The publicist went to Baekhyun and she held his face with her hands. “You’re such a mess right now. How could you let someone screw your face? For heaven’s sake you’re a celebrity Baekhyun, your face is very important.” She ranted furiously before she slammed a brown envelope on the table.

Without saying anything, Baekhyun took the envelope. He sat on the couch as he slowly opened and took out several photos from it. I couldn’t see the photos but I suddenly felt antsy when I saw how he immediately looked uncomfortable after checking the photos.  

"They're all over the internet." The man told Baekhyun in a much calmer way than the woman ever did. “Why didn’t you tell me about this ahead of time Baekhyun?”  
  
“I’m sorry Manager Kang…I just...I just don’t want you to worry about me.” Baekhyun explained, looking up at the man.  
  
“But that’s his freaking job!” The woman intercepted. “To know everything you’re up to so we could prevent this kind of trouble. And he obviously failed to do so.” She was still fuming.   
  
“Miss Kim, will you please calm down?” Manager Kang said as he turned to the woman. “We’re not going to come up with a solution if you continue to yell.”  
  
She looked at him with narrow eyes.  
  
“Well I think this is also not the time for you to be on his side Manager Kang. It’s obviously his fault! He was being careless. He wasn’t thinking.” She finished her statement by turning to Baekhyun.  
  
All three of them went silent for the next few seconds. Manager Kang ended up sitting next to Baekhyun, his hands on his head as stared at the floor.  
  
“Was her face shown?” Baekhyun asked his manager and I immediately held my breath.  
  
“No.” He answered. “Her face was blurred out on the photos.”  
  
I was sure Baekhyun and I let out a sigh of relief almost at the same time after hearing his manager’s response.  
  
“Not yet.” Miss Kim stated getting the men’s attention and obviously mine too. “What?” She asked as she glared at them. “Let’s be real here. It's only gonna be matter of time for your fans to eventually know about her identity.” She added in a matter of fact tone. “And we all know that when that happens, it'll be messy for her."  
  
Her words for sure slapped me in the face. She was right. She was absolutely right.  
  
I stared at Baekhyun who was now leaning on the couch, his head up with his eyes closed.  
  
“Who is she?” It was Manager Kang who asked him. He held one of the pictures and pointed something on it which I was guessing would be me.  
  
Baekhyun opened his eyes and turned to the picture his manager was showing him.

“She’s my girlfriend.” I heard him say.  
  
I knew this wasn’t the right time nor the situation to blush but my face was all heating up. And I know that they couldn’t see me but I instantly stopped watching them and leaned my body back on the wall. He was obviously in trouble for having me as his girlfriend.

"Girlfriend!” The woman shrieked. “Wow Hyun Seok he has a girlfriend and you didn’t even know!”

None of the men reacted to her sarcastic remarks.

“Where did you even meet her? Did you meet her at the bar? Have you been clubbing all this time?” She continued to interrogate.  
  
“No.” Baekhyun replied with a controlled voice. I could imagine him glaring at her right now.  
  
"My god Baekhyun!” She shrieked once more. “May I remind you how much you worked hard for what you have and who you are right now? Are you going to throw everything just because of some random girl-"  
  
 _Random girl_. I bit my lip as I felt a pang in my heart.  
  
“Don’t!” Baekhyun yelled. It was the first time he raised his voice since they came. “Don't you ever dare call her that." He sounded so furious making me want to cry right away.

"So you're yelling at me now, huh?" The woman fired with the same level of rage in her tone. "Where is she anyway? Is she here?" She asked as I heard her angry footsteps heading somewhere.  
  
"Leave her out of this Miss Kim." Baekhyun said and he absolutely didn't sound like he was asking, there was an evident demand in his voice.

"What are you talking about? She's already a part of this controversy Baekhyun. If you didn't want your girlfriend to be involved in all of these then you should've been fucking careful!"  
  
There was silence and I couldn’t bring myself to look at them. I was biting my lower lip trying my best to hold back the tears.  
  
“Eun Hye, please stop.” It was Mr. Kang.

“Then what do you want me to fucking do Hyun Seok?! Tell him it’s okay when it’s clearly not?” She replied furiously. “Damn, I’m already going insane. I’ve been receiving nonstop calls since this morning about this issue.”  
  
“I’m sorry.” It was Baekhyun this time. “Look, I admit that it was reckless but…” There was a brief pause. “But she was being harassed by some guy and I couldn’t just stay in my car.”  
  
“Well maybe that would’ve been better-” Miss Kim tried to reason out but Baekhyun cut her.  
  
“No!” He said firmly before I heard him smirk. “Don’t ever expect me to do that because even if I was given the chance to change what happened last night, I would still go out of my car and beat the hell out of that man. I would never let any man lay a finger on her.” He was so furious that even if I couldn’t see him right now, I could imagine his jaw clenching and his hands forming into fists.

“You know why?” He added. “Because I love her.” There was vehemence at the same time firmness in his tone.  
  
 _I gulped, finally giving in to tears._ I covered my mouth with my hands to make sure they wouldn’t hear me.

“Oh c’mon Byun Baekhyun!” She sounded almost laughing. “You know it’s never gonna work out.”  
  
“No Miss Kim.” He contradicted hastily. “I’m not gonna let you decide whether my relationship will work out or not.” Baekhyun responded right away. “So, don’t you ever tell me to end things with her because that’s not gonna happen.”  
  
“So, how do you expect us to resolve this matter?” She asked.  
  
“It’s your job. It’s what you’re hired to do right?” Baekhyun sarcastically replied. “You’re a publicist. You’re supposed to be good at covering issues like these. It’s not like it’s going to be your first time anyway.”  
  
“My god Byun Baekhyun.” She hissed. “Will you stop acting like a child?”

“Can’t you see? That’s what I’m exactly doing. You’re not going to dictate me how to live my life like what you’ve been exactly doing for the past years.”  
  
For the next few seconds, the entire house was filled with silence. Then I heard the woman’s clicking footsteps leaving followed by the main door slamming.

“Baekhyun,” It was Manager Kang’s voice so I was guessing that Miss Kim  left alone. “I know you’re stressed and confused right now but please don’t do something you might regret later.”  
  
“I’m sorry to cause you trouble this time Hyung but…I don’t wanna lose her. I can’t.”  
  
 _I cried harder._  
  
“I have sacrificed a lot for this dream, you know that very well Hyung…but I’m going to make sure that she’s not gonna be one of them.”  
  
There wasn’t any response from his manager.  
  
“Will you help me?” Baekhyun asked him in a low voice.

It was a question but I had a feeling that he was subtly asking for his help.

“Of course, Baekhyun.”  
  
“Thanks Hyung.”  
  
“Okay, I’ll get going now. I’ll meet with the entire team for a meeting. We have to be ready before CEO Jung summons us.”  
  
“Okay.” There was another pause from Baekhyun. “By the way Hyung…I know I was rude to Miss Kim a while ago but I knew exactly what she’s trying to make me do-” Baekhyun started to explain but his manager did not let him finish.  
  
“I understand. Don’t worry I’ll talk to her but can you please keep a low profile right now? I’ll take good care of your schedule. Just promise me you won’t let anyone see the bruises on your face right now.”  
  
I didn’t hear anything from any of them until the Main door closed. Then I was drowned with the realization that I meant this much to him. I knew he loved me but he was trying to risk his entire career for us.

_God, do I really deserve him?_ It was overwhelming but heartbreaking at the same time. What would happen next was something my mind could not fathom.

 

***

  
I made sure I wiped any traces of tears off my face before I slowly stepped out of my hiding place and the first thing my eyes saw was Baekhyun. He was sitting on the couch, his eyes fixed on the table in front of him where several pictures were scattered. My heart was beating wildly as I started to climb down the stairs.

I was walking towards him, trying to come up with the right words to say when he finally noticed me. I was only a few feet away from him and when his eyes met mine, I shivered. I wanted to run to him and be inside his arms so bad but I couldn’t get my feet to move. All I could do was to stare at him as tears started to pool in my eyes again.    
  
I felt guilty at the moment. I felt sorry for him. This would’ve never happened if he hadn’t met me in the first place. He was looking back at me in silence as well as we were about three feet away from each other. Then I looked away from him and my attention fell on the pictures scattered on the table. I held my breath straightaway as I recognized them. There were from last night. I absent mindedly walked towards them to take a closer look. I was scared and ended up gasping when I saw the photos up close.  
  
“Oh my god.” I muttered, my hands finding their way up to cover my mouth.  
  
There were three pictures. One was taken when we were both walking towards his car. Though it wasn’t a close up shot, Baekhyun’s face was recognizable despite the cap that he was wearing. Thankfully, the bruises on his face were not on that angle. He was somehow blocking me so I wasn’t that exposed on the first picture. The second picture was taken when he opened the door of the car for me. I was standing right next to him, his arm on my shoulder. For some reasons, we were staring at each other on the photo. I couldn’t remember how or why were we in that state but I was thankful that because my hair was covering most of my face, making it hard for me to be recognized. The third one, however, was the one that made my heart sink. It was at the same time the second photo was taken the only difference was the angle. It must have been taken by a different person from a different spot. The picture was obviously zoomed in since it’s was a little pixelated. It was showing Baekhyun’s back profile and leaving my entire face exposed if they had not blurred it out. They covered my face but it was not relieving at all. The fact that someone out there knew how I exactly looked like was enough to get me weak on the knees.  
  
“I’m sorry.” He muttered, getting my attention right away.

I turned to Baekhyun who might have been staring at me the whole time. He was still on the couch with an apologetic look on his face. He must felt so terrible about all of these and I do too.  
  
“I’m sorry.” He said once more with a sense of guilt.  
  
He slowly stood on his feet, brought his both hands on his waist, fixed his eyes on me for a brief second before he looked away to take a deep breath.  
  
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He apologized over and over again, his eyes piercing through mine and it broke my heart everytime.  
  
“Baekhyun stop. Please.” I begged when I finally found the courage to speak.  
  
“No,” he shook his head. “This is all my fault. I dragged you into this mess. You shouldn’t be dealing with any of these-”

“Did you forget why were you there in the first place?” I asked to interrupt him. “It was because of me, right? You have bruises on your face right now because of me, because I wasn’t being careful.” I felt anger building up inside me. “You got into a fight with your publicist and your manager because of me.” I was practically yelling my words to him so he could clearly see that he shouldn’t be blaming himself right now.  
  
He was taken aback and just stared at me the whole time.  
  
“In fact…” I added after a moment’s reflection. “None of these would’ve happened if I hadn’t carelessly ran into you up at the old hiking place. If I had been more careful and didn’t assume that you were going to jump that day-”

“Damn it Park Hae Won!” He yelled, totally catching me off guard. “I already told you that none of these are your fault!”

“Then for pete’s sake stop blaming yourself too!” I replied with equal rage, tears streaming down my cheeks.

I couldn’t believe we were both staring furiously and yelling at each other right now. His hands balling into fists, his jaw clenching. I, on the other hand, was crying out of anger and frustration.

“This is insane.” He hissed as he finally made the first step and walked towards me.

The next thing I knew, he was already pulling me into a bone crushing kind of hug. Honestly, the moment his skin touched mine, I felt the urge to cry more because I realized that I love him so much. And the thought of us parting was already unbearable. The longing would be too strong. I wouldn’t be able to stand it.

“I don’t wanna lose you.” He whispered. “I can’t lose you.”

I closed my eyes, my heart feeling warm because of the gentleness of his voice. He was gently stroking my head and this gesture made me hug him tighter. I couldn’t breathe anymore but I didn’t care. I wanted him to feel that I didn’t want to lose him too. After a few moments, he broke the hug as his hands rested on my shoulders. I stopped sobbing and concentrated on him. There were tears in his eyes and I was pretty sure, when he momentarily looked up, that he was trying to control himself from giving into them.

“This may sound selfish and I know…” he trailed off. “I absolutely know that asking you to stay is too much to ask.” He paused once more to stick his tongue out to wet his lips. “But if you’ll give me a chance, I’ll do everything to make this right and get you out of this mess…just… please don’t,” He cupped my face in his hands. “Don’t give up on me now baby.”  
  
A saw how tears roll down his cheeks as he closed his eyes.

_My heart broke._ It hurts too much to see him crying. I felt so guilty for making him feel that I would abandon him.  
  
“I promise.” I muttered as I lifted a hand to his face.   
  
He opened his eyes and stared at me instantly.  
  
“I won’t let go of your hand Baekhyun.” I said reassuring him.  
  
I saw how relief beautifully painted his face. He wasn’t smiling but I knew he was happy because it was so evident on the way he gazed at me.  
  
“I’m sorry if I made you think that I was leaving you. I was just so surprised. I got scared. I was confused. I…I didn’t know what to think nor what to say to you a while ago…I feel-”  
  
His lips crashing into mine prevented me from finishing my explanation. His kiss wasn’t needy nor aggressive but was rather fast and consoling.

He was gazing at me again in silence. He must’ve been trying to read me. I let my lips curve into a smile to assure him that we were okay.

“I love you.” He said as he leaned closer to brush his lips against mine once more.  

 

***

It was almost one in the afternoon when Baekhyun had another visitor. It was a man. He looked like he was about the same age with Baekhyun. He was also about the same height. He was handsome and for a moment there I thought that he was a celebrity too. However, Baekhyun told me that he was the one he was talking on the phone a while ago.  
  
“This is Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun introduced his visitor to me. “My best friend.”

“Hi, you must be Hae Won, the girl this man is talking nonstop.” He said in a deep voice as he offered his hand.

“Nice to meet you Kyungsoo.” I was starting to blush when I took his hand.  
  
I saw how his heart shaped lips formed into a smile.  
  
“I asked him to take you to your Hotel since your friend must be worried sick about you now.”

_Oh god. Liz. I totally forgot about her._

“Oh god, I have to go find my phone first. I have to text her before she calls the police and reports that I’m missing.” I blurted as I intended to leave the living room.  
  
“Hey baby, wait.” Baekhyun called.  
  
I stopped on my feet and turned around to look at him. I saw him took the paper bag, I didn’t notice Kyungsoo was holding all along.  
  
“Here.” Baekhyun said, handing the paper bag to me.  
  
“What’s this?” I asked taking it from him.  
  
“I asked Kyungsoo to bring clothes you could change into since you couldn’t go home in my shirt and my pajamas.” Baekhyun replied.  
  
“Wait. What? You asked your friend to buy clothes for me? How? I mean, he hasn’t even seen me yet. How would he know that these clothes will fit?”  
  
The two of them exchanged looks.  
  
“What is the exchange of looks supposed to mean?” I wondered interrupting their moment.  
  
“Soo Ah.” It was Kyungsoo who answered. “She actually sent me those.” He added pointing to the paper bag I was already holding.  
  
 _Soo Ah. I was pretty sure it’s a woman’s name._  
  
“Who’s Soo Ah?” I asked Kyungsoo and when he didn’t answer, I looked at Baekhyun.  
  
“She’s my cousin.” He stated.  
  
“Oh.” I muttered at the information. “But she hasn’t seen me too, right?”

I saw Baekhyun lift a hand to scratch his head.

“She actually did.” He replied.

“But I don’t remember meeting her.”  
  
“Well…” He sighed. “Okay, when you passed out last night, I didn’t know what to do and how to get you home because obviously I can’t be seen at the hotel carrying an unconscious girl…” Baekhyun started to explain. “So, I called her. And after yelling at me for calling and waking her up at two in the morning, I told her about my situation and asked for help. She told me that I didn’t have a choice but to bring you home with me and since I couldn’t take you to my condo, we drove you here.”  
  
“We?”  
  
“Yeah, I dragged her here. She left at eight this morning so you weren’t able to meet her anymore.”  
  
I nodded as I take all the information I’m getting from him in. Then I remembered about Baekhyun telling me to the “undressing” a mystery a while ago.  
  
“So, it was her?” I asked Baekhyun. “She was the one who changed my clothes? You didn’t do it, right?”  
  
I saw Kyungsoo chuckled right next to Baekhyun. Baekhyun’s face turned red and it was too late for me to realize that he must have been embarrassed. _Oops_.

“You fool! You really love her, don’t you?” Kyungsoo said with a wide smile on his face. “You asked your cousin to change her clothes when you could have easily done it-”  
  
“Shut up Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun snapped.

Kyungsoo burst out laughing.  
  
“I mean you didn’t have any trouble doing it before-”  
  
“Yah! Do Kyungsoo, do you want to die?” Baekhyun glared at his friend.  
  
Kyungsoo continued to laugh so hard at his friend’s reaction. It was obvious that he was teasing him.   
  
“Uh, I’m gonna go change now. I hope you don’t kill each other while I’m gone.” I whispered as I climbed up the stairs.  
  
  


***

  
It was half past two in the afternoon. All three of us were outside his house and it was just then I noticed how huge his house was. It even looked like a Villa. There was a large space used for parking. There were four cars and I assumed one would be Kyungsoo’s leaving the remaining three to Baekhyun. The first car was a black Audi, the second one was the one he took to go to the old hiking place which I believed was a Mercedes-Benz and the other one was the silver Audi that he used last night.  
  
Kyungsoo went to get the car ready, leaving Baekhyun and I alone.

Baekhyun was helping me zip up his black padded jacket that he made me wear on top the fancy, plain pastel pink dress they got for me. It was a wrapped around, midi dress with long sleeves. Along with it was a pair of strappy nude sandals which I must admit I also loved? In fact, I believe his cousin has a good taste in fashion. She and Liz would for sure get along.   
  
“I clearly told her to send something with a thicker material, but no! She still sent what she liked.” He whined, his default pouty state activated. “Who even wears this dress and heels in this weather?” He added with his eyebrows furrowed.  
  
“Baek, I’m fine.” I told him as I stifled a smile because he looked so cute when he whined.

“Are you sure?”  
  
I nodded as I smiled at him.  
  
“Just take the jacket off when you’re already inside the hotel, okay?”  
  
I nodded once more.  
  
“When are we gonna see each other again?” I asked, my voice unexpectedly sounded sad.  
  
His facial expression went from soft to serious.  
  
“I’m gonna make a way to see you as soon as possible. Just take care of yourself. And don’t you dare get lost.”  
  
“M’kay.” I muttered. “I’ll miss you.” I told him before I could even stop myself.  
  
This whole situation we were in right now made me anxious. I knew something’s going to change between us. I knew he had to keep a low profile so it probably meant not meeting me for the mean time. Just the thought of it made me sad.  
  
He lifted a hand to my cheek. “You know I miss you already.” He leaned to plant a kiss on the cheek where his hand was.  
  
I hugged him. Closed my eyes and tried my best to remember the feeling. His warmth, his scent, his entire presence.  
  
“Baby?” He uttered.  
  
“Hmm…”  
  
“If you trust Liz, I think you should tell her about us. I know it’s hard not being able to tell anyone. So, maybe you could talk to her about it.”  
  
My eyes went all teary again because of what he said. He seemed to really understand how I felt but then again, I was easy to read. So, he probably noticed it.  
  
“Thank you.” I told him.  
  
“Hey Lovebirds! Am I the only one who thinks this is uncomfortable?” Kyungsoo shouted from inside his car.  
  
Baekhyun and I laughed as we broke the hug. He walked me to his friend’s car and opened the passenger’s door for me.  
  
“Drive Safely.” Baekhyun told Kyungsoo, bending his body with his hands resting on the rolled window of his friend’s car.

“Everyone knows I am a better driver than you are Baekhyun. Stop pretending that you don’t know that already.” Kyungsoo replied in a very serious manner that for a second there I thought that he was angry.

I was about to get worried but Baekhyun burst out laughing.

When Baekhyun laughed, I took the chance to gaze at his crescent eyes. I was being melodramatic all of a sudden and I was beginning to feel really uncomfortable with the thought of us parting. I didn’t want to leave just yet.  
  
“Don’t tell her anything stupid too.” The smile on his eyes didn’t leave as he continued to talk to his friend.  
  
I keep staring at him the whole time. I wanted to touch his face.

_Seriously Park Hae Won, you better deal with this separation anxiety._  
  
“Everyone knows it’s not my forte.” Kyungsoo replied and he sounded as serious as his previous remarks.  
  
“I’m only going to let you win this because you’re doing me a big favor.”  
  
“Okay Baekhyun, please open the gate before you start crying.”  
  
Baekhyun laughed once more. “Crazy.”  
  
He turned to me and gave my cheek one last caress. We both stared at each other but Kyungsoo cleared his throat.

Baekhyun glared at Kyungsoo who was now chuckling.  
  
“Bye baby.” He said when he turned to me.

His velvety voice made my heart warm. He smiled one last time before I stepped away from the car.  
  
Just like what Kyungsoo said, Baekhyun did walk towards the huge gate of his house. He stood on the side and pressed something attached on the wall. It must be the control.

When the car passed him, he waved a hand with a smile on his face. I smiled at him but waving goodbye at him right now made me feel like crying again. When I looked back, I saw how his smile disappeared as he tilted his head down.  
  
 _That broke my heart._

_Again._  
  
But I was willing to go through all of these.

_Right?_   
  


  
~♥~ 

Sorry if I made you wait longer for this update but here it is.^^ 


	16. Sixteen

Sixteen  
  
  
~♥~ 

  
The way his smile vanished made my heart sink. I had a feeling that he was trying to be strong and appear like everything was under control but the confirmation was just unbearable. I wanted to cry. In fact, I would’ve already been crying if not for Kyungsoo who seemed to have already noticed my behavior.  
  
I took a deep breath, looked out the window to shake the sadness away. Of course, it wouldn’t work but I had to at least try.  
  
“He talks a lot about you.” It was Kyungsoo’s deep voice that broke my train of thoughts.  
  
I looked back at him straightaway as he glanced at me. He smiled, the one that was very comforting and honestly, it made me want to cry even more. Gosh, this separation anxiety was something I couldn’t handle. The truth was, I hadn’t really been good at it, _ever_.

“I remembered the first time he called me and told me about the girl he met up in the mountain.” He paused to let out of a chuckle. “He talked about you for days and wanting to see you again.”  
  
I thought of Baekhyun telling me that he went back to the hiking place two weeks after we met hoping he could see me again. I almost blushed at the thought.  
  
“And when he finally did, he asked me if it was weird to tell you that he likes you that soon…I said yes.” He paused to make way for another smile.  “So I guess he kept it to himself for a while. Did he?” Kyungsoo asked momentarily tearing his attention from the road to turn to me.  
  
I nodded. I recalled the day he got jealous of Eun Chan and ended up telling me that he wanted to be my boyfriend. Just thinking about it gave me the exact feeling I felt that moment.  
  
“He’s crazy about you.” His statement was accompanied by a reassuring smile on his face. “I asked him if he was sure about what he was getting into. I reminded him it’ll be complicated because of his celebrity status. You know what he told me?”  
  
I didn’t say anything but just stared at him obviously waiting for his next words.    
  
“He said only a fool would let you go.”

I blushed, flustered at the thought of Baekhyun talking about me to his friend like that. Damn, it was even overwhelming to just think of him talking about me to anyone.  
  
I tilted my head down to look at my hands on my lap. My lips curved into a smile. Not because I was happy. Honestly, I felt sorry for Baekhyun having to go through what he would have to go through because of me.  
  
“He’s strong. You should know that. He’s one of the bravest person I’ve ever met. So, I am pretty sure that he’ll fight for you and what you two have.”

I swallowed the lump that I could already feel in my throat. _Gosh, Park Hae Won please don’t embarrass yourself._  
  
“I guess you are too.”  
  
I immediately looked at him, confused of what he just said.  
  
“Well, it takes a lot of courage to love a Byun Baekhyun.” He said in a matter of fact tone. “Aside from the fact that he’s crazy famous, he’s also a kid trapped inside a grown man’s body.”  
  
He glanced at me and for some reasons we both laughed at the same time.  
  
“That, alone is bravery.” He added as he went to back to fix his attention to driving again. “I guess what I’m really trying to say is, I hope you stay with him. As long as you can.”  
  
I could feel his sincerity and concern while he said those words.  
  
“Damn, Baekhyun should pay me for being this cheesy.”

I saw how his eyebrows furrowed, looking disgusted. I let out of a soft laugh feeling a bit better somehow. I know I just met Kyungsoo but for some reasons I knew exactly why he’s best friends with Baekhyun. It was relieving to know that Baekhyun had a friend like him.

  
  
***

  
It took us about an hour and forty-minute drive to reach the hotel where Liz and I were staying. I unfastened the seat belt after I thanked him for driving me here.

My heart was racing as I entered the huge glass doors of the hotel. Images of Liz yelling and nagging about what happened last night flooded my thoughts as I absent mindedly walked towards the elevator.  
Once I was inside, I debated whether to tell her everything or come up with another lame excuse. The latter one actually seemed impossible given the chaos going on inside my head right now. When I reached our floor, the first thing I did was to take off the padded jacket Baekhyun made me wear.  
  
I contemplated for a few moments before I knocked on the door. I immediately heard her rushing to the door and in just a matter of seconds, she and I were already faced to face.  
  
“Oh my god Hailey!” She exclaimed as she pulled me into a very tight hug.  
“I’m sorry Liz.” I muttered just before she let go of me.  
  
She initially glared at me but her expression softened after a few seconds. “You have a lot of explaining to do Hailey Park so you’d better be ready.” She blurted as she dragged me inside the room.  
  
“You didn’t call the police, right?” I asked her, wanting to make sure that the situation hadn’t gotten that worse.  
  
 _Well, not that wasn’t already._  
  
“I was going to if you didn’t appear just now.” She reasoned out, her hands crossed over her chest. She pouted before her attention fell to what I was wearing. “Why are you dressed like that?  What happened to your clothes?”  
  
I was about to open my mouth to tell her about it but she raised a hand towards me, apparently signaling me to stop. I did.  
  
“Never mind, that is not the most important thing right now.” She stated as she sat on the bed and tapped the space right next to her.   
  
I went to sit on her designated place for me. We both stared at each other for a brief second before I looked away. I was nervous. It was the first time I would be talking about Baekhyun. In fact my relationship with Baekhyun.  
  
“Hey.” I felt Liz’s hand on my knee.  
  
Turning to her, I saw that the expression on her face softened. She might have understood my hesitance.

“I promise. I will not overreact nor judge you.” She said sounding so reassuring. “As long as he’s not married, I’m okay with it.” She added and it was obvious that she was trying to make me feel comfortable.  
  
I took a deep breath before I grabbed my purse to fish for my phone. Unlocking it, I went to a portal site and typed in Baekhyun’s name. As expected, the first entry about him was about us. There were articles with the same pictures I had seen this morning. My heart started to race as I handed the phone to Liz.  
  
Her eyebrows furrowed as she took it from me. And in just a matter of seconds, I saw how her facial expression shifted from confused to shock.  
  
“This is you and the guy I saw you with last night.” She said, recognizing the photos straightaway.  
  
She tore her attention from my phone to glance at me probably asking for confirmation. I nodded.  
  
“Byun Baekhyun.” I muttered. “His name is Baekhyun.”  
  
She suddenly went speechless. She made a few taps on the screen and appeared to be reading something. She must have clicked on one of the articles.  
  
She gasped.

“They’re saying that you might be his girlfriend!”  
  
I didn’t make any sound, unable to find my words.  
  
“Is that true?” Liz asked me, her eyes were probing. That one look that she tends to give me when she’s suspicious.  
  
I nodded.

She didn’t gasped or something but brought her free hand to her mouth and just looked at me then back to my phone again. She did it a few times before she decided to check on Baekhyun more.  
  
I saw her scrolling on his images and I couldn’t help but feel antsy while she did it. She had been doing it for a few minutes when she finally made a sound.  
  
“Oh. My. Freaking. Gosh.” She said, exaggeratedly syllabicating the words. “This guy is freaking hot and cute at the same time Hailey Park!” She added as she showed me a particular image of Baekhyun.  
  
It was a concert picture. Black haired Baekhyun, white t-shirt with sleeves rolled up to his shoulders leaving his toned arms exposed. He had mic on his hand which was inches away from his mouth. He was sweating probably due to his performance leaving his hair damp. There was also a fierce look on his face and his eyes weir piercing.  
  
“This is your boyfriend?!” Lizzie asked with evident firmness in her voice.  
  
“Yes.” I answered.  
  
“You…” She pointed at me only to stop what she’s about to say as she continued to scan my phone.  “I was worried about you falling for boring guys but… THIS!” She exclaimed, emphasizing her last word. “This is so unexpected. So unimaginable. So….controversial.”  
  
I couldn’t really tell whether she was supporting or scolding me. She would look thrilled one moment but then her forehead would also crease in disagreement.  
  
“Now I get why you tried so hard to hide this from me.” She stated catching my attention once more. “I thought this thing only happens in the movies.”  
  
I could only look at her. I didn’t really know how to react to her statements.  
  
“I wouldn’t ask if you love him because you obviously wouldn’t jump into this risky situation if you didn’t love him but…” She paused as she moved closer to me until our shoulders were already touching. “Do you think it’s worth it?”  
  
I knew exactly what she’s trying to point out.

“Honestly…” I uttered before I filled my lungs with air. “I don’t exactly know how things are going to turn out Liz. I am scared…” I paused to stop the tears that were already starting to form in my eyes by briefly tilting my head up.

“I am not used to any of these. When I found out about the photos this morning, I was terrified. I got so scared, I didn’t know what to do…and I still don’t.” I turned to face her and found that her face was painted by worry. “I don’t know what to do Liz.”  
  
She reached out to hold my hand. She didn’t say anything but it was already comforting.  
  
“But…” I bit my lip as I took another deep breath. “He’s worth it.” I said just before a tear rolled down my cheek. “It’s scary but…I love him.”  
  
“Oh Hailey.” She sounded and looked like she’s about to cry when she pulled me into a gentle hug. “I understand. For one second I thought of yelling at you to make you realize how crazy this is but I know you. You’re brave.” She was stroking my back gently with her hand. “And I couldn’t really blame you though, he’s hot.”  
  
I almost choked because of what she said so I ended up slapping her arm as we both let out of a soft laugh.

“Does anybody else know about this?” I heard her ask the moment we were facing each other again.  
  
“His friend knows and probably his cousin too. As for me, you’re the only one who know about this.” I said hoping that she’d get the message to keep this a secret. “You won’t tell anyone right?” I asked wanting to make sure.  
  
“Of course, I wouldn’t get you in trouble.” She swore, bringing her hand to her chest.

“I already am.” I replied unable to stop myself from thinking out loud.  
  
“As much as I want to tell you that everything will be fine, I won’t do that.” She sounded serious. “You know I am not the one to comfort you with easy words. It’s going to be tough but I’ll support you.” She added with a tight lipped smile on her face. “And if you happen to decide to walk away from all of these, I’m with you too.”  
  
I forced myself to have my lips curved into a smile as well. Liz has always been the realistic type. She’s straightforward and doesn’t sugarcoat things. So, I totally get why she’s telling me these stuff.  
  
“I just hope you don’t end up hurting yourself too much in the process.”  
  
I felt a tug in my heart right at that very moment but I didn’t have enough time to entertain the feeling when she asked me to tell her how Baekhyun and I met. And so I did, I told her how we both met at the old hiking place. Then our conversation led to me explaining to her how I discovered Baekhyun’s celebrity status, how he confessed and how we finally got together.  
  
Liz had a huge smile on her face while I tell her stuff that I thought were okay to share to her. For a moment there, I felt relieved being able to talk to someone about my feelings for him. And I realized how much I missed talking to her about stuff like this. For the past months, I had suppressed and kept my feelings all to myself. It was hard not having someone to talk to.  
  


 

  
***

  
I didn’t receive any message from Baekhyun the whole afternoon and I was too hesitant to text him first thinking that he might be busy because of the whole issue. I knew he was my boyfriend and I shouldn’t feel this way but having Baekhyun as a boyfriend was a totally different story.    
  
The night fell. I didn’t go out of the hotel. In fact, Liz asked me to eat dinner outside with her but I was scared to go to public places thinking that someone might recognize me so I refused. She was okay with staying in the hotel at first but she received a message from one of her cousins who also lived in Seoul to meet her. She asked if it was okay for her to leave for a while and I said okay.  
  
However, it was about past nine in the evening she also sent a message telling me that her cousin asked her for a sleepover.  
  
 **Lizzie:**  
 _Sorry Hail, I couldn’t say no to her. She told me her kids wanted to see me so much and asked me to stay with them for a night. I promise I’ll come home early in the morning tomorrow._  
09:24PM  
  
 **Me:**  
 _It’s okay Liz. Please don’t mind me. I’ll be fine._  
09:26PM  
  
 **Lizzie:**  
 _You sure?_  
09:26PM  
  
 **Me:**  
 _Yes. I’ll see you in the morning._ J  
09:27PM  
  
 **Lizzie:**  
 _Okay. Thanks Hail. Good Night._  
09:27PM  
  
When I realized that I would have the room to myself for tonight, I immediately decided to take a warm bath. It took me about an hour and all I could think was Baekhyun.  
  
 _Why do I miss him this much already?_

_“God, I’m so in love with you. It’s crazy.”_ I kept rewinding this scene in my head. I remembered how he exactly said it after we broke the kiss in the closet. I knew full well that I shouldn’t be reminiscing this given the situation that we’re in but these thoughts were involuntary.

  
***

I was already half lying on the bed. I turned on the television to distract myself from anything related to my celebrity boyfriend because I felt like going insane for not being able to talk to him. And the fact that I didn’t have any idea as to when I’d be seeing him again made me feel worse.

The TV was on but my attention was elsewhere. I didn’t even know what channel was on or what program was being aired at the moment. Then something flashed on the TV screen that immediately caught my attention. It was a news report and I suddenly froze when I saw what it was about. The pictures I saw at Baekhyun’s house were flashed right before my eyes. My heartbeat raced as the female reporter talked about Baekhyun being seen right outside the bar last night with an unknown girl.

_“A lot of Baekhyun’s fans speculated that the girl he was with is probably someone he’s dating. The famous singer had always been very careful with his private life especially with his past relationships so these pictures have obviously shocked his fans all over the world. It’s too early to jump into conclusions but his supporters are already asking for his clarification. As of now, we haven’t received any words both from Baekhyun and his agency…”_  
  
I didn’t let her finish and changed channels right away. My hands were slightly trembling as I kept pressing the remote control but found it pointless so I turned the TV off instead.  
  
I unconsciously bent my legs up to my chest, my arms circling around them. And before I knew it I was already nibbling the tip of my right thumb. I spent the next few minutes overthinking and it only lead me wanting to cry. I wish I knew what to do at times like this. I just saw myself on TV with Baekhyun.  
  
Without having second thoughts, I grabbed my phone because I felt like calling my sister, my mom or Aunt Sunny but of course, I couldn’t. _I wouldn’t._ Then I decided to send Baekhyun a message because apparently he’s the only one who could and would understand. No, actually he’s the one I needed right now.

With slightly trembling fingers, I typed in my message but ended up deleting all the characters because I couldn’t come up with anything because honestly, I didn’t know what to tell him. So, I resorted to putting my phone back on the bedside table and ended up covering myself with the blanket as I forced myself to sleep by shutting my eyes. I didn’t know how long I fought with all the crazy thoughts in my head until sleep finally kicked in.

  
  
***

2:46 AM  
  
I woke up to my phone ringing. I stretched an arm to reach for my phone before I brought it next to my face to check who was calling me.  
  
BYUN.  
  
I blinked twice or may four times to make sure that I wasn’t dreaming. I wasn’t, he was really calling me. Why was he calling me this late? Did something happen? I was already slightly panicking. I sat up on the bed while I tapped on the answer button.  
  
“Baek…” I muttered with a voice that had obviously just woken up.  
  
“Hey Baby, sorry to wake you up.” He said in his usual gentle tone.  
  
“It’s okay.” My answer came really quick as I bit my lower lip. “I’m glad you called.” I told him honestly.  
  
I heard him laughed softly. “I missed you too.”  
  
I smiled instantly because of how assuming he sounded but then he was right. _I do miss him._  
  
“Is something wrong?” I asked him out of curiosity. “I mean I knew something is already wrong but did something happen ag-”  
  
“I called because I can’t sleep…” He intercepted. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

I fell silent, my face heating in the process too. I also felt the urge to feel the warmth of his embrace right at the very moment. I wanted to see him so much it made me sad.  
  
“Last night.” He uttered. “When you were soundly sleeping right next to me, I couldn’t help but stare at you. Actually, I did it until I fell asleep.”

I was loss for words.  
  
“I wish I could do that right now too. I wish you’re here beside me.” He stated with a wistful tone. “If things were easier for us, I’d drive to where you are right now.” He added before he sighed probably because of frustration.  
  
I knew I had to say something but all I could do was listen to his voice. My heart was melting because of his words and the fact that we both felt the same way made me anxious because we also both knew that we couldn’t do anything.  
  
“Can we switch on to Video?” He asked all of sudden leaving me rattled.  
  
I was about to open my mouth to say something but was cut when I realized that he already switched on his video. He was on his bed. He was wearing a plain white shirt, disheveled hair, bare faced with the still visible bruises.  
  
I was shy but that would be a very lame excuse. Just to make sure my hair wasn’t all over the place, I brushed it with my fingers. I was already in my pajamas so I straightened out my top before I turned my video on. It was a little dark since I only had the dim lights lamp on.   
  
We both didn’t say anything for a few moments and it was surprisingly comfortable instead of being awkward. He was just looking at me and I did the same thing. His facial expression was so soft while he bore his eyes into mine.

“You’re the most beautiful like this.” He wasn’t smiling but he said it with a note of affection.

I held my breath for a second as I felt my face heating.  
  
“Are you saying that to make me blush because it’s working.” I replied with a nervous laugh trying to ease the tension building inside me.

He chuckled.  
  
“Will you stop blushing?” He asked with a lingering smile on his lips. “Don’t make me kiss my phone because that would be so awkward.”  
  
We both laughed at his remarks. This man really knew how to make me laugh. He just knew when and what words to say. No wonder, he’s so in demand.

Then my thoughts inevitably wandered to the news I watched a while ago.  
  
“You okay baby?” His, now slightly raspy, voice caused me to snap out of my thoughts.

“I...I was watching TV earlier tonight and I saw the news about you…I saw the pictures…” I trailed off when I saw him looked away, a pained expression written all over his face.  
  
 _He was guilty. I made him feel guilty again._  
  
“I’m sorry you had to see that.” He apologized as he looked at me again. “When I told you that I would do everything to get you out of this, I mean it. I really do-”  
  
“Baek.” I interjected to get his attention. “I believe you.”  
  
Relief swept through me when I saw him smiled softly. Then he mouthed something I wasn’t able to hear clearly. _Was that an I love you?_  
  
He then shifted his position. He went from half lying to completely lying down. He also rolled to one side of the bed, placing his phone adjacent to his face.  
  
“Did you tell your friend about us?” His voice came out sleepy this time.  
  
“Yeah.” I answered as I also changed my position into a comfortable one.

“What did she say?”

“Well she was so surprised. I was pretty sure she thought I was crazy but I was thankful she understood.” I answered as I watched his sleepy eyes blink in slow motion.  
  
My lips formed into a curve. He looked so cute I needed to bite my lower lip to stop myself from giggling like a crazy fangirl.  
  
“She also said you’re hot.” I stated to tease him because I was curious to see his reaction.  
  
“Well, she’s not lying.” He said smirking while he fought the urge to sleep. “Just make sure to tell her I’m already yours.” He added with his eyes closed and it was obvious that he was trying to stifle a laugh.  
  
I let out of a small laugh as I was showered by how adorable he looked right now.  
  
“M’kay.” I uttered.

He smiled but his eyes never opened again. I knew he already fell asleep but I stayed for a few more minutes just watching him. I could hear his breathing and it sounded so beautiful in my ears. My heart was beating so loud and it’s crazy because I was just watching him sleep.  
  
He looked so peaceful right now and it somehow hurts to think that he would be dealing with a lot of things in the coming days. I was sure he’d end up being scolded by a lot of people just like how his publicist yelled at him earlier today.  
  
 _“He’s strong. You should know that. He’s one of the bravest person I’ve ever met. So, I am pretty sure that he’ll fight for you and what you two have.”_ Kyungsoo’s words filled my thoughts.  
  
I had to be brave just like what he was trying to do amidst all of these controversies.  
  
He gently shifted his position. He was now lying on his back, his chest subtly moving up and down as he breathe. Then he got me so surprised when he talked all of a sudden.  
  
“Night baby.”  
  
I suddenly felt that familiar warmth in my heart.  
  
 _God, I’m so in love with this man. It’s crazy._

***

  
The very next day, I woke up at around nine thirty in the morning and the first thing I noticed was Liz’s things on her bed. She must’ve arrived already. I could also hear the shower so she must be taking it right now. I stretched to grab my phone and was welcomed by Baekhyun’s messages.  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _I had a feeling I fell asleep last night. Sorry baby. But then you had a chance to stare at my handsome face, you’re lucky. I hope you did that because I’d be frustrated if you didn’t. Good morning._ J  
06:22AM  
  
I smiled but my forehead creased with the realization that he was up too early.  
  
 ** _Me:_**  
 _Sort of. ^^ Good morning._  
09:34AM  
  
I got up and found that there was food available on the table. Based on the packaging, it must have been from Liz’s sister. I was hungry but I decided to wait for Liz to finish showering.  
  
My phone beeped and I was already smiling without having to check the sender of the message yet. It was also the exact moment Liz came out of the shower. She was wearing a robe with a towel on her head and instantly shot me with as questioning stare. I guess the smile on my face was to be blamed.  
  
“You have a crazy look on your face Hail. I guess your famous boyfriend is texting you, huh?” She said teasing me.  
  
I just let out of a small laugh.

“What time did you arrive?” I asked her instead of answering her question.  
  
“An hour ago.” She replied as she went to the closet for her clothes.  
  
I took the opportunity to check the message I just received. I was all smiles thinking that it would be Baekhyun’s reply but it wasn’t. The smile on my face disappeared straightaway when an unregistered number appeared on my inbox. I tapped on it so and read it.  
  
 **010 **** ****:**

_Hi Hae Won. It’s Eun Chan. Do you think we could meet this weekend?_  
09:36AM  
  
“Why did he text me all of a sudden?” I asked, totally unaware that I was verbalizing my thoughts.  
  
“Eun Chan?” Liz said, popping her head from the closet. “As in your first love Eun Chan?”  
  
“Y-yeah.” I answered realizing that it was too late for me to hide it from her. “He actually came to visit me at my Aunt’s house last time.”  
  
“Hmmm interesting,” She commented before going resuming to scan for her clothes. “What did he say?”  
  
“He’s asking if we could meet this weekend.”  
  
“So, you’re going to meet him?” She asked casually once more.  
  
“I don’t know. I guess, not?” My answer sounded so skeptical.

“Why not?”

“Because I already have a boyfriend Liz.”

“You’re just meeting an old friend Hailey, what’s wrong with that?” She said in a matter of fact tone as she appeared in front of me, her clothes on her hands. “Unless you still like him.”  
  
“Of course I don’t like him anymore Liz.” I hastily replied.  
  
“Well then there wouldn’t be any issue if you meet him.” She prodded while she put her clothes on her bed.  
  
“Baekhyun wouldn’t like it.” I murmured not sure if I wanted her to hear that.  
  
“He doesn’t have to know.” She insisted since she obviously heard what I said.  
  
I sighed exasperatedly as I sat on my bed in front of her. I somehow got annoyed because she was apparently pushing me to meet Eun Chan. And I don’t get why. Or maybe I do.  
  
“I don’t want to do anything that’ll make my relationship with Baekhyun more complicated than it already is Liz.” I told her and I wasn’t able to hide how irritated I was.  
  
“Okay fine. My god Hailey, chill.” She replied defiantly, raising an eyebrow.  
  
I got so triggered so I stood in front of her.

“You know what, I think I know what you’re trying to do here Liz. You wanted me to meet Eun Chan so hoping I would get interested again and when that happens, I’ll forget about Baekhyun right?” I told her with a sigh of irritation.  
  
“Well…” She trailed off. Her face turned red. I evidently caught her off guard.  
  
“I thought you’re going to support me on this Liz.” I told her sounding hurt.  
  
She sighed momentarily looking away from me.  
  
“Okay, I’m sorry.” She apologized, meeting my eyes. “You’re right. Somehow, I was still hoping that you’d change your mind Hail. I just don’t want you to get hurt. And let’s admit it, this whole situation with Baekhyun is going to hurt you in one way or another.”  
  
 _She might be right._  
  
“I know you’re worried about me Liz and I would feel the same way if you were in my situation but I already told you that I’m not leaving him. And I am not going to choose someone over Baekhyun.” I reasoned out making sure that she’d feel the firmness in my words.  
  
“Okay, okay. As I’ve said, I’m sorry. I promise I’m not gonna try to convince you to do something you don’t want to.” She sounded sincere this time as she went closer to me and gave me hug.  
  
I softened as my anger died down. We had been at each other’s throats a lot of times in the past and once one of us admits her mistake, we’d end up saying sorry by hugging the other person. And that’s what she was exactly doing right now.  
  
“The truth is…” She paused to lean slightly lean her body away from mine so she could face and talk to me. “I think this whole stuff you have with Baekhyun is so romantic. I kind of had the feeling that he really liked you by the way you talked about him. And believe me, I wanted things to work out for the two of you it’s just that…okay, I was being an overprotective friend.”  
  
“Really?”  
  
She nodded. “And I told you, he’s hot.”

“Yes, I know.” I said confidently and as our eyes met once more, we couldn’t help but to burst out laughing.  
  
“Since you’re not meeting Eun Chan, can we please go out? Can we please go somewhere? I’m going back to Australia tomorrow and I wanna see the rest of Seoul.” She pleaded. “You were not clearly seen in the pictures right? So, you only have about two percent out of ten being recognized.”  
  
I was still worried but Liz was right, she’s going back to Australia tomorrow and I’d go back to my mom’s hometown as well. It’s our last day in Seoul.  
  
“Okay.” I nodded in agreement. “But can we please eat that?” I said pointing at the food on the table. “I’m starving.”  
  
She laughed. “Of course.” She dragged me towards the table. “My cousin gave it to me. Her husband’s a chef so we’re so lucky.” She informed as we both got ready to eat.  
  
I laughed at the thought of us bickering moments ago but enjoying the same food now.

***

  
The first place we visited was Namsan Tower. We had both heard about this place a lot and since we spent most of our lives in Australia, we had never been there once. We were aware that the place was always crowded by tourists but since it was a weekday, it wasn’t really the case. There were people but not that much. At first I was a little bit uncomfortable with a lot of people but Liz was right. The chances of me being recognized because of the blurred pictures were low. So, I decided to forget about it and focus on the place.

We were both delighted when we saw the love chains in person. We also enjoyed the view from the tower where we could see the whole Seoul City. Liz liked taking pictures a lot so as expected, we both took a lot of instagrammable photos.   
  
Next, we went to Gangnam which was known to be a good hang out place. There were also a lot of shopping places. I was dragged by Liz to almost all of the shops. We, of course, did not leave empty handed.  
  
It was about eight in the evening when we finally decided to look for a good restaurant for dinner. When we found one, we both ate some of our favorite Korean food such as Samyetang, Bulgogi and of course Kimchi.  
  
We also went to a café called _Sun and Moon._ And we were fascinated by the theme and the interior of the place. It was cozy and magical inside. They’re just so stylistic and pretty.  
  
Liz was at the counter ordering while I sat on the spot we chose which was next to the tempered wall. I had always loved Cafés in Korea.  
  
I checked my phone and found an unread message. The message was sent about 30 minutes ago. I secretly hoped it was from Baekhyun and when I found out that it was indeed from him, the corner of my lips involuntarily turned upwards.  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _I’ll drive you home tomorrow._  
08:49PM  
  
 **Me:**  
 _Are you sure?_  
9:22PM  
  
I was surprised when he replied right away.  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _Yeah. I’ll come pick you up._  
09:23PM  
  
My forehead creased upon reading his reply. I was pretty sure his manager told him to keep a low profile for now. Why was he suddenly so eager to come pick me up and drive me home?  
  
 **Me:**  
 _How is that keeping a low profile Baek?_  
09:24PM  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _I don’t care. I want to see you._  
09:24PM  
  
I instantly sensed something was wrong. He sounded mad. The tone of his message was rebellious in a sense. I got worried. I was about to type in my reply to ask him about it but Liz showed up in front of me. I decided to keep my phone instead.

Our orders were served after a couple of minutes. We started to talk about some of the places in Korea we haven’t visited yet and promised to check them out next time. Liz also told me to take her to the old hiking place since she was really curious where I met Baekhyun. We were both laughing when Liz suddenly stopped.  
  
“What’s wrong?” I asked her.  
  
She pointed somewhere and when I followed the direction she was referring to, I saw the huge, wall-mounted TV of the Café where Baekhyun was currently shown. I instantly held my breath as I gazed at him. We couldn’t hear anything because the music inside the café filled the entire place but it didn’t matter.  
  
I saw Baekhyun getting out of his car with a hat, sunglasses, and mask on. He was right outside his company building and was making his way inside. There were fans and press outside who were busy taking his pictures.  
  
 _So, he went to his company today_. Was that why he sounded mad a while ago? My heart started to beat wildly upon the confirmation. _What could’ve happened?_  
  
I almost forgot Liz was right in front of me because for some reasons she wasn’t able to talk too. She also had this annoyed expression on her face which made me wonder. I cleared my thoughts so I could ask her. When I finally did, I opened my mouth to speak but I heard the customers right behind us talking about Baekhyun. I ended up closing my mouth to listen.

“Do you really think he was dating the girl he was with?” It was a woman’s voice.  
  
“I don’t know, she doesn’t look beautiful.” Another woman commented.  
  
“How could you say that? Her face was blurred out on the photos.” The first woman replied.  
  
“It doesn’t matter, it was so obvious that she's not pretty. And maybe she’s just someone Baekhyun met at the Bar. You know, one of those girls. She looked like one anyway.” The other woman reasoned out.  
  
I felt the familiar pang in my heart. I wasn’t mad. I was hurt. It hurt to hear people judging me like this. Then I was startled when Liz stood as if she was ready to fight the women talking.  
  
“Liz… don’t. Please.” I told her in a low voice because causing a scene here will definitely make the situation worse.  
  
She thankfully listened and went back to sit again.    
  
We both continued to listen since it was so hard to ignore them.  
  
“Baekhyun used to like cute women right? Do you remember the time when he was rumored to have a relationship with Kim Ara two years ago?”  
  
“Yeah. I liked Kim Ara. She was pretty and Baekhyun seemed to like her very much.”  
  
“Exactly. I mean look at the girl he was with, she’s tall and definitely not Baekhyun’s type.”  
  
I swallowed hard. Tears already pooling my eyes. _Kim Ara?_  
  
“Anyway, I hope Baekhyun clears everything as soon as possible so we could just all live in peace.” The woman who had been badmouthing me added.  
  
“Poor Baekhyun, he’s suffering because of that girl.” The other one stated. “She should just get lost really-”  
  
I wasn’t able to hear her next words because I couldn’t take it anymore. I stood and instantly left my seat to storm out of café but just as I was about to reach the exit, I overheard Liz. I glanced back and saw how she _accidentally_ spilled her drink on their table.  
  
My heart was too heavy to even call her so I quickly pushed the door open. I inhaled as much air as I could when I was finally outside. I didn’t even bother stopping in front of the café. I walked away making sure to put as much distance between me and those girls.  
  
 _It hurt. It really hurt._  
  
“Hail, stop! Wait for me.” Liz called and that was the only time I stopped walking.  
  
She stood in front of me when she was finally able to catch up.

“They were a bunch of useless bitches.” She told me. “They’re also very ugly so please don’t mind them.”  
  
I wiped the tears from my cheeks.  
  
“They don’t know anything about you.” Liz added, placing both of her hands on her waist. “Gosh, I hoped they didn’t blur your face on the picture so they would see how beautiful you are.” She huffed, her bangs moving with the air coming from her mouth.

“You shouldn’t have stopped me a while ago really, I would’ve punch their mouths so bad.” She scolded, her voice filled with annoyance.  
  
I just looked at her trying my best not to cry again.  
  
“You okay?”  
  
I took a deep breath.  
  
“I’ll be fine Liz.” I forced myself to smile. “I guess there will always be a first time to everything.” I added making an effort to sound as reassuring as I could.  
  
Liz gave me a comforting smile as she reached for my arm.  
  
“I hate them for making me spill my drink, I liked the flavor so much.” She whined. “But it was satisfying.” Liz added as she grinned.  
  
I was about to comment on her war freak attitude when my phone rang inside the pocket of my overcoat.  
  
 _It was Baekhyun._  
  
Liz saw the name on my screen so she stepped away from me to give me space.

“Baek…” I said as soon as I answered his call.

“Are you outside?” He asked, his tone wasn’t as gentle like the other times he talked to me on the phone.  
  
“Yeah. I’m with Liz. We went around since it’s our last day in Seoul.” I said trying my best not to sound like I went through what I just experienced.  
  
“Is everything okay?”  
  
“Yeah. We’re on our way home now.”  
  
Our voices sounded dry.  
  
I heard him took a deep breath but didn’t say anything.  
  
“I’ll see you tomorrow Baek.” I told him because I knew the last thing he needed was a rejection from me. “I’ll wait for you to pick me up… I’ll wait for you.” This time, I made sure he would sense the affection in my voice because I didn’t like talking to him like we were fighting.  
  
“Okay baby.” He replied and I was relieved to finally hear the gentleness in his voice. “Will you text me once you get home?”  
  
I smiled. “Of course Baek.”  
  
“Okay, take care on your way home. Bye Baby.”

  
***

  
Liz and I were both standing at the bus stop since we both agreed to try something we had never done before so we’re taking the bus in Seoul for the first time.  
  
“Hail?” She called.  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
“Why didn’t you tell Baekhyun about what happened a while ago?”  
  
I thought about her question because the truth was, I never really had the intention of telling him about the incident in the café. He’s also dealing with a lot right now. He’s got his whole agency, his publicist, his manager, his fans, the press and the public to appease.  
  
  
“He has his own battles too.” I said as I took a deep breath.   
  
Liz only looked at me and I knew she felt sorry for me. Maybe for Baekhyun too.  
  
“And they’re way bigger than mine.”

 

  
_Brave. I needed to be brave._  
  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
AN: Here you go. The update is late but I made it longer. ^^ I hope you like this. A lot of things are going to happen in the next few chapters so please be patient with my updates. ^^  
Please forgive me if there are typos, I'll make sure to check on them, when I have the time. Thank you for waiting. ♥


	17. Seventeen

Seventeen  
  
~♥~  
  
  
  
  


Liz’s flight back to Australia was at eight in the morning. She told me I didn’t have to take her to the airport anymore so we said our goodbyes at the hotel lobby. Liz left me with the most encouraging words she could come up with and reminded me to be strong. However, we also ended up laughing when she said that if something bad happened to me, or she’d hear people judging me again, she’d fly back to Korea and would start punching their faces.  
  
I felt a little bad that the only person who knew about my relationship with Baekhyun wouldn’t be by my side anymore but I had to face it. I also didn’t want to her to worry about me so I made sure to keep a straight face the whole time I was talking to her.  
  
The first thing I did when I got inside the room was throw my body on the bed. With my arms spread sideways, I stared at the ceiling. I thought about a lot of things such as going back to the town, Liz’s departure, my life in Australia, my life right now in Korea, what might happen in the future, my family who knew nothing about what I was going through…  
  
 _Baekhyun_  
  
I thought about him the most.  

 

***  
  


Ten Thirty AM.  
  
I was at the parking lot of the hotel With my luggage in one hand, I searched left and right for Baekhyun’s car. Actually, he initially told me that he’d wait right outside the hotel but of course I couldn’t let him do that. That would be too risky for the both of us, especially for him. I knew for a fact that he didn’t like it but I had to do it anyway.  
  
I was about to reach the corner of the parking lot when I finally found his car. He must have seen me immediately because I saw the driver’s car door being opened as soon as I stood behind his car. I held my breath for a moment as I looked around to see if there was anyone else aside from us. There was none, but I still couldn’t relax with the thought of him getting out of his car like this. So, I ran towards him as fast as I could, leaving my luggage behind.  
  
He was already on his feet when I blocked his way. He was wearing the black bucket hat again, his face half covered by it. However, his aura still spoke that he’s someone famous and could easily get attention.

“What are you doing?” His question was quick and his tone wasn’t that happy with what I was obviously doing.  
  
“Baek, please just-” I lifted a hand to his arm. “Just wait for me inside.”  
  
“But your luggage-”  
  
“It’s okay I can do it. Just unlock the compartment for me,” I replied “someone might recognize you here.”

“Don’t you think this is too much?” I could sense irritation in his tone.  
  
 _This is bad. I thought_

I looked up to meet his eyes and I almost regretted doing it. Even though, I couldn’t see the look on his face due to the hat, I could clearly tell that he was displeased.  
  
“So, I am not allowed to help girlfriend with her damn luggage now, huh?” He ended his statement with a smirk.  
  
“Baek…” I paused to bite my lower lip, doubting for a moment if I did make the right decision. “You know I’m just trying to be careful, please don’t take it that way-” I said with a gloomy sigh.

“Yeah, I get it.” He replied obviously wanting to end the conversation as he turned around to get inside the car once more.  
  
My heart was heavy as he closed the door but I chose not to entertain it. I went back to get my luggage to put it in the compartment of his car. Walking towards the passenger’s seat, I couldn’t help but be anxious.  
  
 _Oh god, it’s going to be a tough ride._  
  


***  
  


Surprisingly, the traffic wasn't that bad and in just a matter of more or less thirty minutes, we were out of the busy streets of Seoul or so I thought because I didn't really know much about the place. What I did know though, was the fact that Baekhyun chose to ignore me the whole time. His face never relaxed even once too.  And I couldn’t ignore the sight of how his grip on the steering wheel tightened from time to time.  
  
I wasn't sure if I'd congratulate myself for surviving being in the car with him in this state the whole time or I'd mock myself from letting it all happen by trying to be okay with it.

He looked hot though, looking angry while he drove. _And my god how could I even entertain this thought right now? I must be out of my mind._

He wasn't in the mood. Maybe even before he went to pick me up. Maybe since last night. Not once, he smiled at me and I didn’t really expect him to do it after what happened at the parking lot a while ago.  Well, I mean…smiling wasn't really a big deal but the aura he's radiating right now was heavy. The atmosphere inside the car was uncomfortable, it was starting to get suffocating.

I would stare at him from time to time, hoping that he'd somehow notice it and finally talk to me but he didn't. His attention remained fixed on the road. In fact, I kind of had the feeling that he was doing it on purpose. He didn't want to look at me.

And honestly, I couldn’t help but be upset but I decided to remain quiet. I ended up leaning my head on the headrest before I darted my attention outside the window like what I had been doing since we left the hotel.  
  
I sighed biting my lower lip.  
  
  
***

  
An hour later.

My heart wanted to explode because no matter how much I tried to think of something else, I’d find myself glancing at him again.  
  
 _I had to try._

"Are we going to be like this the whole time?" I finally asked him, making sure my voice didn't sound sarcastic to the point that I sounded like a scared child instead.

"Just go to sleep if it makes you so uncomfortable." He replied bluntly as soon as he heard me talking without even paying me a single glance.

 _Ouch_.

I swore the way he said it was knife stabbing. I couldn’t help but bite my lower lip, this time in complete disappointment.

"Fine." I muttered unable to stop myself from glaring at him. “Byun Baekhyun.” I added, frustration and hurt both evident in my tone.

Maybe wanting to talk to him and prying on the matter only made matters worse so for the nth time, I looked outside the window trying to shove my hurt feelings out of the way. I didn’t have a single clue about what happened when he went to his company so I needed to understand him. _I had to. I had to._  
  
However, all I did for the next few minutes was to battle against the part of me wanting to cry because I would totally embarrass myself if I gave in to my stupid tears right now. I felt like an idiot missing him the whole time and now that I was finally able to see him, he'd end up treating me like I was a nuisance. It even almost felt like he didn’t want to see me.  
  
It was confusing. One moment, I’d resolve to understand his side, the next I couldn’t help but succumb to my own emotions. I couldn’t even seem to make up my mind how to exactly feel about the matter.

 

***  
  
  


I lost track of time. I didn’t know how long we’ve been driving but I noticed that we had already reached a coastal road. I hadn't seen this when I travelled to Seoul because I took the train. Since the view of the sea was on his side, I had to look past him to check it.

I loved the sea and the one we're passing right now was so beautiful. It was just such a shame we couldn't enjoy it together. If things were just different, I’d ask him for a stopover. I’d ask him for a walk by the shore. It would’ve been lovely. However, I knew for a fact that it wouldn’t happen.

Then his phone, which was placed on the gadget holder next to him, rang. I could see the screen clearly and I knew right away that it was Manager Kang. I was expecting him to answer it but to my surprise, he didn’t. His manager called once more, this time he grabbed his phone from the holder only to turn it off. After switching it off, he recklessly shoved it inside the glove compartment which was located in front of me.

He ignored Manager Kang’s calls and it only meant something bad happened. Could it be that the situation had already gotten worse?  
  
I shivered on the thought as I started to panic in silence. I closed my eyes, forcing myself to concentrate on the crashing sound from the waves.  
  
 _I couldn’t-_

  
I couldn’t take my mind away from the issue no matter how much I tried. It’s impossible when the chaos inside me was building up as I grew anxious and frustrated at the same time.  
  
His presence right next to me was so strong, I wanted to cling to him for comfort. I wanted him to tell me that everything was okay. But then, instead of warmth, all I was getting from him was his cold treatment. And I didn’t know how long I’d be able to handle it before I lose my composure.  
  
“Please stop crying.” His voice made me snap out of my thoughts.  
  
He said it without any trace of affection.  
  
“Stop before I completely lose my freaking mind.” He added, his eyes piercing through mind.  
  
 _Wait-  
Was I crying?_  
  
I instantly lifted my hands to my cheeks to check if I was indeed crying, only to find out that he was right. I looked out the window to wipe my tears while I scolded myself silently for shedding tears. I didn’t even know I was already crying. The last thing I knew I was holding it in but then I guess my traitor tears gave me away in the end.  
  
My heart was beating so loud behind my chest. And I was pretty sure I’d start crying again if we go like this any longer.  
  
“Can we talk?” I hesitated.  
  
He turned to me with narrowed eyes, his hands clenching on the steering wheel.  
  
No words. No words came out of his mouth.  
  
“Are you really mad at me because of the whole luggage issue?” I asked once more as I try my best to keep my voice from shaking.  
  
I saw how his chest went up as he took a deep breath. I was hoping he’d finally say something but he momentarily turned to the sea instead before fixing his attention on the road once more.  
  
 _Hurt or anger._ I didn’t know which feeling to acknowledge at the very moment. All I knew was that my heart was about to explode.   
  
“You’re being unfair.” I blurted out lividly.

 _I guess anger won over._  
  
He immediately turned his attention to me and I could tell he was a bit taken aback with what I just said and how I said it.  
  
"I missed you." I muttered and there was no gentleness in my tone, obviously unable to think coherently. "And you have to know that it was so hard to keep you off my mind for the last couple of days. I didn't even want anything else but to see you again. But now? Now that we’re here…you’re next to me but you don’t even wanna talk. You won’t even look at me." I could feel the lump in my throat as I watch him trying his best to focus on driving.  
  
"I know you're going through a lot right now Baekhyun and in some way or another, you know that I am too." I paused to fill my lungs with air. "It’s hard. It’s way too hard for me to handle but I am already trying my best here.”  
  
I met his eyes for a brief second.  
  
“So, can we just go through this together? Please don't make me feel like I'm being pushed away..." I trailed off.

I waited for a few moment hoping I’d finally hear something from him but I guess I better face the fact that he was never going to talk to me until we reach the town.  
  
“If you’re going to be like this, you shouldn’t have bothered driving me home.” I told him in a matter of fact tone as I dart my attention outside once more.  
  
He stopped the car.  
Without warning.  
  
It was so quick that it sent my body leaning forward. I glanced at him only to find him already looking at me. The expression on his face was unreadable but I had seen it before. It was the same look he gave me the day he saw me with Eun Chan but I was pretty sure this has nothing to do with jealousy. There was rage, hurt…confusion? I couldn’t really tell but I was certain that the chaos inside him was way bigger than mine.  
  
As his eyes continued to bore into mine, it was obvious that he was trying to control whatever it was that he was feeling at the moment. I was about to open my mouth to speak when he, all of a sudden, unfastened his seatbelt and directly went to open the door. He got out without a word. I, on the other hand stayed on my seat, confused and feeling more uncomfortable as I watched him walk towards the passenger's seat.

In a blink of an eye, he opened the door for me before leaning towards me to take my seatbelt off.

"Baekhyun what are you doing?" I asked but my question was left unanswered.

He grabbed my wrist firmly, taking me out of the car. As soon as my feet landed on the ground, his right hand found its way to my nape. He tilted my head up towards him and the next thing I knew, his lips were already crashing against mine.

I was so surprised that my eyes remained opened for a few seconds.

I was pretty sure he could sense how shocked and confused I was because I remained steady, including my lips. However, he didn't seem to be bothered as he continued to kiss me roughly. His hands went to the small of my back, pulling me closer against his body. 

 _What was he doing?_  
  
"Baek-" I tried to protest but was cut by his kisses. "Wa-" I tried to push him away using my hands that were trapped between our bodies but he didn't even budge. "Baek...hyun...wa...it."  
  
He was angry. His kisses were angry to the point that it already hurt. I knew he was venting his anger out through the kiss and I couldn't help but be more frustrated.

I was already panting and already felt like crying because he wasn't listening. He wouldn't. So, I stopped struggling but I wasn't kissing him back. And the only moment I closed my eyes was when I couldn't help but let go of the tears welling up my eyes.

_I was crying. I was crying because…I didn’t know why I was crying exactly._

It was probably my crying that knocked him back to reality. His lips slowed down before he completely stopped kissing me. He opened his eyes to directly meet mine but I looked away. When he loosened his hold on my waist, I immediately stepped away from him to make sure that he wouldn't be able to grab me again easily.

I lifted my right hand to my lips as I continued to cry silently.  
  
"I'm sorry..." I heard him say as he sighed apologetically.

I felt him move towards me, extending his hands to console me but I was so frustrated right now. It hurt. What he did, hurt. Not just physically. In fact, the tug I felt in my heart was way too heavy. I wanted to understand him but I couldn’t ignore the fact that I had my own feelings to deal with too.

"I'm sorry baby.” He lifted his hands to run his fingers through his hair, held it there while he started at me with a regretful look.  
  
For some reasons, it broke my heart even more. I couldn’t stand watching him like this. He looked devastated. He even looked like he was more hurt that I was. And it’s a lot to take in.

I walked away.  
  
I made hasty steps towards the road rails as my hair was danced with the harsh coastal wind.   

"Hae Won." I heard him call but I didn't bother glancing back.  
  
"Please…Where are you going?" He asked me once more as I kept walking.

The truth was, I didn't know where I was going. I just wanted to put as much distance between us right now. I just needed a little space to process everything. I knew I’d end up coming back, crashing into his arms later but I just need space to breathe right now.  
  
I could hear him a few steps from me.

"Baby, it's freezing.”  He told me. “Stop walking away, please.” He pleaded before I felt his hand on my wrist.

I finally stopped walking as he blocked my way. The wind blew and it was just then I realized how cold it really was already. I shuddered. His hand felt so warm and I instantly felt the need to collapse inside his arms right away. I bit my lower lip as I gathered every ounce of energy I have left to stop myself from doing it.  

There was a few moments of silence. All I could hear were the crashing waves from the sea and the angry wind. I knew he was staring at me but I darted my eyes to the ground. I didn’t want to look at him. In fact I was scared to do so because I might just start crying right away.

"They wanted me to break up with you."  
  
His words made me change my mind. I immediately looked at him and saw just how hard it was for him to tell me about it. I couldn’t even overlook how hurt he sounded.

"They asked me to end things between us." He added in a controlled voice. "All of them...including Manager Kang." I saw him swallow hard before he titled his head down, his hands landing on his waist.  
  
 _He felt betrayed._

I felt sad. No, not just sad. I felt regretful too. Maybe I overreacted. Maybe I got too emotional and I forgot to truly understand his circumstance. Maybe I got too selfish trying to mind my own feelings instead.

Struggling against the cold, made a hesitant step towards him.

"Now, I've got no one on my side." This time he undeniably sounded pained. "He told me he'd help me but..." He paused as he turned to the sea. "He ended up abandoning me in the end."

I saw how his jaw clenched after his last statement.

I recalled how he asked his manager for help that morning at his house after the conversation they had with his publicist. His manager sounded so sincere when he told him that he’d help him. So, how come it had led to this? There must be a reason. There had to be a reason.

"Maybe…maybe he didn't have a choice." I said as I made one more step closer to him. "Maybe he had to do it to protect you."

He turned to me and I hoped I knew what to say to take away the pain in his eyes.

"I told him I can't lose you." His eyes were piercing through mine. "But he asked me to do it anyway."  
  
I was loss for words. This was way more complicated that anything relationship related issue I went through in the past. Way more heavy and risky.  
  
We gazed at each other for a few moments before he spoke once more.  
  
“Can we please stop fighting?” He asked, his voice filled with affection. “I knew I was an asshole a while ago. I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking straight. I couldn’t.” His voice was soothing as he apologized once more. “I didn’t want to talk to you because I was thinking you’d ask me what’s wrong and I’d end up telling you about everything you shouldn’t really worry about.” He stopped to wet his lips. “I know things are already too much for you and I didn’t want to drag you into the mess that I should be dealing with instead.”  
  
He removed his hands from his waist as he moved closer to me, the tips our shoes almost touching.

“When you told me how much you missed me a while ago, I couldn’t think of anything else aside from kissing you. But I was just so angry that it all came out the wrong way.”

My body jerked when he brought his hands to cup my face, his right thumb gently brushing my lips.  
  
“I’m sorry for hurting you.”

I knew I wouldn't be able to come up with the right words to say. So, I leaned closer to him for a hug. I gently wrapped my arms around his body and I could feel how fast his heart was beating when I rested my head against his chest. I tightened my hands around him to make sure he’d understand that it was okay. His breathing slowed down as I felt him relax after a few moments. Then he wound his arms around me, giving me just the exact warmth I missed and needed at the very moment.  
  
“Do you forgive me now?” I heard him.  
  
I wanted nothing more but to ease the burden he’s carrying right now.  
  
 “Maybe…” I muttered on my attempt to make him feel lighter.  
  
I knew how he’d exactly react on my response so I couldn’t help but smile when he leaned away from me and threw me a questioning stare when gazed at me. He looked at me with narrowed eyes, his lips forming into a thin line.  
  
“What do you mean maybe?” His eyebrows furrowed.  
  
“Maybe…I’d forgive you if…” I trailed off on purpose as I observe his reaction.

“If?”  
  
“If you…” I paused because for some lame reasons, I started to hesitate. “Kiss…me…properly.” I gulped right after I finished the sentence I had in mind anyway.  
  
His eyes grew big. Of course, he’d be surprised. I wasn’t really the kind to ask for a kiss, was I? I started to feel really shy when he grinned, his smile reaching his eyes.  
  
 _Oh thank god._ I thought feeling relieved that I managed to make him smile.   
  
“I’d like that… very much…” He said but I could sense that he wasn’t going to do it.  
  
“But?”  
  
“But it’s starting to get very cold out here, I don’t want us to get sick-“  
  
 _Oh god._ I just got rejected, right?

 _Right?_  
  
I felt so embarrassed. I wanted to comfort him and make him feel better by being affectionate, which I must note, I did for the first time. I asked him to kiss me for the first time but he ended up rejecting me. I wanted to vanish into thin air. This was beyond humiliating.  
  
I awkwardly removed my hands around him to detach from him before stepping away to break the hug.  
  
“O-kay...” I muttered, my voice just above a whisper and honestly I didn’t know if he heard that.  
  
I turned around to walk ahead of him.  I lifted my hands to cover my face and found out that my face was so hot. _I swear, I’m not going to try and do something like this ever again_.  
  
“Hey baby?” I heard him call and it was obvious that he was trying not to laugh.  
  
I didn’t mind him as I continued to walk hastily towards the car.

“You really want it?” He asked and I swear I could hear his smile. “So bad?”  
  
 _Oh gosh!_ This man was making fun of me. I wanted to go back and punch him in the face but of course I was too embarrassed to even turn around and beat him.  
  
I closed my eyes, biting my lip when I heard him right behind me. He grabbed my wrist and had me spinning around. It all happened so fast and I’m quite frazzled how he managed to hold me close to him in just a blink of an eye.  
  
I was startled and all I could do was to look at his face. I wanted to protest but his stare was magnetizing. There wasn’t any trace of amusement on his face now. He was just starting at me intently as I felt his hand resting gently at the small of my back. The wind continued to blow so my hair was a mess, strands covering my face. He lifted a hand to brush them away, gently tucking them behind my ear. Then his attention fell on my lips as he brought his fingers to touch them delicately.  
  
 _I swear I’d melt any second from now._  
  
“You know what? I don’t care anymore. Let’s just catch a cold together.” He muttered before he leaned closer to plant a kiss right on the corner of my lips first then grazed his lips against mine.

He kissed me softly that when I closed my eyes, his lips felt like satin. The sensation it was giving me plus the sound of the crashing waves from the sea made me weak in the knees. And just as his both hands met right behind my neck, the kiss went a little deeper. His thumbs were caressing my cheeks matching the movement of his lips.  
  
I always found myself in a trance everytime we kissed. A state where I fully become aware of the every detail of my body. The way my heart would beat loudly, the way the chaos in my head would disappear, the way my hands would automatically cling for support as I grew weaker as the kiss went on and just the way my lips would match his pace and jive with the rhythm of his kisses.  
  
“I guess I’m forgiven?” He asked when he finally freed my lips from his.  
  
I nodded with a smile.  
  
His hands went from my face to my hands. He held them tightly before bringing them to his mouth. I saw how he closed his eyes as he planted two small kisses at the back of my hands. When he looked up, his signature _eyesmile_ was impossible to admire. I smiled happily because I just loved it when his smile reached his eyes.  
  
His arm was draped over my shoulder as we both walked back to the car. I secretly glanced at him because I couldn’t help it. His presence never failed to overwhelm me that I’d still need some convincing that this person right beside me was indeed mine. He seemed so unreal. Like how he’s stroking my arm up and down to make sure I don’t get really cold.  
  
I was beginning to get lost in my thoughts when we finally reached his car. He opened the door for me before he went to the driver’s seat. He was about to turn the ignition on when I noticed him grinning from ear to ear.  
  
“Byun Baekhyun?” I called and I thought he’d get what I meant exactly by saying his full name.  
  
“Yes Baby?” He turned to me, his smile even wider that his eyes were almost closed.  
  
“Your crazy smile is making me uncomfortable. What are you thinking about?”  
  
He chuckled.  
  
“Well…” He cleared his throat. “I just kind of liked it when you asked me to kiss you.”

My eyes grew wider, heat slowly taking over my face.

“You looked cute a while ago…” He added as if his previous remarks weren’t enough to remind me how embarrassing that was.  
  
“You should do it more often.” He told me finishing his statement with a wink.  
  
“OH MY GOD BAEKHYUN. JUST GO.” I demanded him while my face must have turned into a tomato.  
  
He laughed so hard while he revved the car.  
  
 _I cannot believe this man, really._  
  
  
  
***

  
  
We were about fifteen minutes away from the entrance of the Village when Aunt Sunny called.  
  
“Hi Auntie.” I greeted.  
  
“Hae Won, are you on your way home now?”  
  
“Yes Auntie. Why?” I couldn’t stop myself from asking because she already knew I was going home. I texted her this morning and there seemed to be a noticeable urgency in her tone. “Is something wrong?”  
  
“No, no… but Eun Chan is here. He’s waiting for you.”  
  
I went silent letting my Aunt’s words to fully sink in. I suddenly remembered his text message the other day asking if we could meet.  
  
“Hae Won?” Auntie called from the line.  
  
“Did he tell you why he wanted to see me?” I asked and it was too late for me to realize that I shouldn’t have asked her aloud.  
  
I noticed how Baekhyun paid me a curious glance right after I said it. I guess, I’d have to tell him about it anyway.  
  
“I’m not sure but he said it’s something important.”  
  
 _Important? What could be so important between us?_  
  
“Okay Auntie. Thanks.” I said wanting to end the conversation right away.  
  
I shoved my phone back inside my purse right after the call. I tried to be silent and pretended that it wasn’t something we should discuss. But then, he it was clear that we weren’t on the same page when he asked me about it.  
  
“Who wanted to see you?” It was evident that he tried to sound as casual as possible.  
  
“Eun Chan.” I muttered looking at him intently.  
  
He didn’t look surprised though. Was I that obvious again a while ago?  
  
“What does he want from you?” He asked in a controlled voice.  
  
“I don’t know. He said it was something important.” I hesitated.  
  
He didn’t reply for a few seconds and I was starting to get worried. I knew how he exactly felt about Eun Chan. He didn’t like him. Of course he wouldn’t like him.

“Okay.” It was his only reply.  
  
I sighed.  
  
“Baek, I promise I’ll tell you what it’s about once I found out.” I told him reassuringly.  
  
He just glanced at me.  
  
“Just make sure he knows you’re already someone else’s Baby.” He replied with a smile. “Okay?”  
  
I nodded.  
  
I was somehow relieved that he was trying to be cool about this just as I was trying too. I knew Eun Chan already got the idea that I wasn’t interested meeting him when I didn’t respond to his message the other day. Or so I thought.  
  
 _What could be? Was it something I should worry about?_

  
  
***

  
  
Since Baekhyun couldn’t really stop in front of the flower shop, he dropped me off at the Bakeshop nearby. Separation anxiety took over me again but I had to fight it. We both stayed inside the car, while he held my hand.  
  
“You have to promise me that you’re going to be fine Baek.” I told him because I was so worried about him.  
  
He looked up to meet my eyes.  
  
“I know you must have felt betrayed but maybe Manager Kang had a reason.” I hesitated as I observed his reaction to check if it was okay to go on.  
  
He didn’t say anything so I turned by body to face him.  
  
“Don’t do anything reckless.” I paused to gently press his hand. “I know how much what we have right now means to you. And it means just as much to me too but…your career, you being the Byun Baekhyun of Korea…don’t let it go to waste. You’re great at what you do. You make a lot of people happy, you inspire people with your songs and your presence. I hope you won’t do something that’ll make you regret later.” I gave him a reassuring smile as I leaned my head against the headrest. “Please?”  
  
He nodded with a soft expression on his face.

“I’ll tell you everything.” He said gently. “We’re going to be alright.” He added as he stretched his other hand to pinch my chin.  
  
  


***  
  
  
I immediately saw Eun Chan in the living room as soon as I entered the house. He was talking to Aunt Sunny and his eyes darted to my direction the moment I got in. I felt a little anxious seeing him inside the house. Though, I was certain it was a different kind of anxious now.  
  
I both greeted them and excused myself for a while to take my luggage inside my room. When I went back to the living room, Aunt Sunny wasn’t there anymore.  
  
“Where’s Auntie?” I asked him.  
  
“Uh, she went to the shop. She told me to just wait for you.” He was smiling but it wasn’t the usual Eun Chan smile.

“Oh…”  
  
“By the way Hae Won, I asked permission from Aunt Sunny if I could take you out for coffee or something and she said yes…I hope it’s fine.”  
  
“Do you really have something important to tell me?”  
  
“Yeah.” He nodded. “I’d tell you about it later. But it has to be just between the two of us.”  
  
The truth was, I didn’t want to go with him but considering that he already ask Aunt Sunny about it and was given permission, I said yes.    
  
  
***  
  
  
We were in small café called _Take me to the Stars._ I liked the name and the concept of the café. The interior had a vintage touch and it was just mesmerizing. There were a lot of starry objects inside. There were little star lanterns hanging from the ceiling. The lights inside were intentionally dimmed to give highlight to the glowing centerpieces on each table.  
  
“It’s beautiful.” I couldn’t help but compliment the place.  
  
“My favorite place.” Eun Chan said as he pulled the chair for me.  
  
“Thanks.” I smiled at him as I took the seat.  
  
“Has it always been here?” I continued to roam my attention around. “How come I’ve never been here before?”  
  
“I’m not sure but I discovered this place about five years ago.” He started. “I kind of liked it the first time so I always make sure to visit this place everytime I’m in town.”  
  
I nodded as I began to concentrate on the glowing star placed inside a crystal vase centerpiece.  
  
“I knew you’d like it here…”

I didn’t know why but when he said it, my eyes automatically met his.  
  
“I would’ve taken you here that day I asked you out, but I guess the timing wasn’t right back then.” He added as he raised his hand to ask someone for the menu.  
  
It made me uncomfortable. And it was funny because I never felt this uncomfortable towards him before when we used to go out for coffee. I’ve always wanted his presence. I’ve always wanted his attention before but then everything was just way too different now.  
  
I watched him gave our order to the staff without even asking me. He ordered something I really liked though. He probably remembered. Of course he’d remember it. We spent a lot of time together before, he probably even memorized the things I like.  
  
We waited for a few minutes before our orders were served and we were very quiet. I would sometimes glance at him and found him looking at me. Actually, I felt his eyes on me the whole time and it only made the situation more uneasy for me. I tried my best to concentrate on my drink most of the time but I couldn’t stand the air between us any longer so I asked him about his visit.  
  
“You told me you have to tell me something right?” I told him finally breaking the ice.  
  
“I would’ve wanted to look at you more but I guess you just can’t stand it anymore…” He let out of a nervous laugh.

His response made me a bit guilty. I knew I shouldn’t because I didn’t really like it but I guess I was too obvious again. I hoped I wasn’t that rude to make him feel so unwelcomed.

“I’m sorry…I’m just a little bit tired from the trip.” I said meaning my words.  
  
“It’s okay. You don’t have to feel bad.” A tight lipped smiled crossed his face.  
  
I did the same thing before taking a sip of my drink. I momentarily looked outside and realized how different it was outside. The sun must be glaring considering that it was noon time. I saw several kids riding their bikes and I thought of my bike immediately. I also thought of going to the hiking place as soon as I have time. The hiking place which eventually made me think of Baekhyun. The place was made more special because of him.  
  
 _I hoped we could hike together some time soon._  
  
“When I asked you that day for coffee and you said no, I kind of got the feeling that it was too late for me to pursue you.”  
  
Eun Chan’s words totally snapped me out of my thought. My private bubble exploded. I even had to blink twice while looking at him to make sure I did hear the right words from him.  
  
“I settled with the thought that you already have a boyfriend.” He smiled sadly as he traced the tip of his mug. “And I was right…”  
  
“Eun Chan...” I muttered but he raised a hand to signal me to stop.  
  
“I just didn’t imagine he’d turn out of be someone like him.”

I looked up at him, my heartbeat starting to go wild. I was alarmed. What did he mean when he said _someone like him_? This was giving me a bad feeling. Why did it seem like he knew something.  
  
“W-what are you talking about Eun Chan?” I asked him trying my best to keep my voice steady.  
  
I was praying so hard that he’d prove my thoughts wrong. _Please tell me I’m wrong._  
  
“Someone famous. Someone adored by the public.”  
  
 _Oh my god._  
  
“Someone I couldn’t compete against.”  
  
 _Oh my god._  
  
I held my breath when I saw him take something out of a brown envelop, which I haven’t noticed he had been carrying all this time.  
  
It was a photo.  
  
I felt like my world stopped spinning the moment I laid eyes on it. With trembling hands, I took the photo and stared at it as if it was my first time seeing it.  
  
 It was one of the pictures taken that night. The one I saw at Baekhyun’s house, the same photo they used on the news. The only difference was the fact that the picture Eun Chan was showing me right now was not edited. My face wasn’t blurred out. My face was clearly seen.  
  
“Someone like Byun Baekhyun.”  
  
 _Oh my god._  
  
  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
__________  
  
AN: Here you go guys. Thanks for waiting. Anyway, I hope you could tell me what you think about this chapter. ^^


	18. Eighteen

Eighteen

 

~♥~ 

 

“Someone like Byun Baekhyun.”

I froze the moment I heard his name from Eun Chan. Never had I imagined talking to him about Baekhyun, especially not this issue, not now. My hands were still trembling when I finally let go of the photo.

“H-how...” I gulped, trying to come up with the words I wanted to say. “Where did you get this?”

I looked up at him who was already staring at me intently but I couldn’t even read the expression on his face.

“I guess you don’t have any clue what I do for a living, since you never got curious anyway.” He stated, emphasizing his last few words.

I fretted, unable to get the response I wanted.

“I work for a top broadcasting company in Korea. It’s not so hard for me to see leaked celebrity photos like that.”

My eyes grew big as I let his words sink in. He’s working for a broadcasting company. Did it mean they have the unedited copy of the photos?

“But the photos,” I breathed, “they had my face blurred out. How come this one isn’t?” I asked him desperately wanting to cure my confusion.

“The moment I saw the photos, I thought of you.” He let out of a soft laugh.

He was laughing? Did he think this was funny?

“At first, I said to myself that there was no way on earth it’d be you but then the more I examined them…the more it made sense. You have the same height, hair, physique…”

My heart continued to race while I listened to him and honestly I wasn’t really sure if I wanted him to continue. If I was ready with all the information he’d provide. If I’d be able to process everything correctly.

“I don’t want to go into details Hae Won.” His eyes were piercing through mine. “To make the long story short, I got the original copy of the photos. I had to go through what I went through to make sure that they couldn’t harm you anymore.”

I swallowed as I momentarily looked outside the café.  
What was he talking about? He had the photos? The original copy? Why?

I turned to him and met his eyes once more. How could all of these be real? Why were all of these happening right now? Things were getting way more complicated every day and I just couldn’t seem to handle it anymore. Tears started to pool in my eyes and I knew that they’re start rolling down my cheeks any moment from now.

“Hae Won…” He muttered as he placed his hand over mine. “The photos would be the least of your problem now.”

I heard what he just said clearly but I couldn’t help but concentrate more on the fact that he was holding my hand right now. It felt nostalgic. It felt familiar yet strange at the same time. This was the man I’ve always adored. The man who had owned a permanent space in my thoughts for the past years. But then, he was also the same man I had learned to let go.

Yet, he’s here now telling me he that I shouldn’t worry about the pictures anymore. I knew I was supposed to be grateful because he’d somehow give me peace of mind but why have I grown more confused instead?

Why is it him of all people? Why is he coming back now? Why is he even holding my hand right now?

Amidst my confusion, there was one thing I was certain about.

Baekhyun.  
He and everything I felt for him.

“Why are you doing this Eun Chan?” I asked when I was finally able to find my voice as I moved my hand away from his.

He looked hurt, his attention followed my hand. He tilted his head down, his hand went back to hold his mug once more. He lifted his drink to his mouth and drank, only to take a deep breath after. Then he gazed at me once again. He looked at me silently for a brief second before smirking.

“A simple thank you would be enough.” He sounded smug.

I was being ungrateful, I knew that part too well so I couldn’t really blame him for acting smug. 

“But you seem to be doubting my intention to help you.”

Doubting? I guess my expressions gave me away again. 

“I’m sorry but it just doesn’t make sense, why would you do that? Why did you go through all the trouble? Did you pay them?” I asked him consecutively that I couldn’t even breathe properly.

“You knew exactly why I did it Hae Won.” He answered gently this time, his eyes never leaving mine.

“No, I don’t know.” My firm response was quick.

I saw him swallowed as he looked uncomfortable for a moment.

“I think, I still have feelings for you.” He confessed in a controlled voice. “In fact, I might have loved you all these years.”

I bit my lip as my heartbeat went wild. My face started to heat up and my hands formed into fists. I was angry. I was so angry how it was so easy for him to tell me that “he might have loved me all these years” now when I had spent the past few years thinking why didn’t he like me back.

Then, without giving it much thought, I stood and left him.

“Hae Won!” I heard him call right before I got out of the café.

I walked straight and never looked back at him but the next thing I knew, he was already tailing me.

“Hae Won!” He called once more, this time grabbing my wrist. “I know I was a coward for not making a move back then but I was just scared. We were good friends and I didn’t want to ruin what we have.” He started explaining when he stood in front of me.

“Liar.” I accused as I freed myself from him. “How dare you. How dare you say you love me now, huh?” I knew I sounded so bitter. “You can’t just show up in my life again and tell me how you feel. That’s just unfair Eun Chan. I waited for you, even when I was already in Australia. I distanced myself from other guys thinking you would make a move but you didn’t. You didn’t, you even stopped communicating with me. And when I was finally in a relationship, I still couldn’t stop thinking about you, so we eventually broke up.” I was catching my breath. “I was that in love with you Eun Chan.”

He looked afflicted shaking his head sideways.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized as he made an attempt to hold my face but I stepped back.

It’s not right for him to hold me now.

“It’s too late for us now Eun Chan. It’s too late for what might have been between us.” I told him meaning every word that came out of my mouth.

He looked hurt for a split second but the expression on his face went smug again.

“Do you really think this thing you have with Byun Baekhyun will work?” He said and I couldn’t overlook the sarcasm in his tone.

How dare him.

“You know for a fact that it won’t work Hae Won. He is living in a different world from yours…from ours. A world you’re not used to. He’s surrounded by prying eyes and you being with him like this will only put you in a situation where people can easily criticize you.” He said in a matter of fact tone.

I felt my jaw clenching as I continued to stare and listen to him.

“Will you be able to put up with all of that?” He asked. “And what about your parents? Alice? Do they know about this?”

“Don’t you ever say a word to them-” I tried to warn him but ended up being cut.

“So they don’t.” He muttered with a nod. “Now I get it, this thing between you and Baekhyun is a secret, right?”

I knew there was something else in his voice. He wasn’t merely asking because he already knew the answer to his question. For some reasons, he sounded threatening me. I didn’t want to entertain this thought but he’s working for a broadcasting company.

I felt my fingers slightly shaking with the thought of Eun Chan doing something that would hurt Baekhyun and his reputation. He wasn’t that bad, was he?

“You’re not going to do it, right?” I asked wanting to hear his answer. “You’re not going to do something to Baekhyun or his career.”

He smirked. “Is that how you think of me now?”

I didn’t reply. I just gazed at him while I silently hoped that he wouldn’t have the heart do it.

“I’m not here to ask you to do anything against your will Hae Won. You don’t do that to the person you love, right?” He paused to shove his hands inside his pockets.

“If you do something to Baekhyun, I swear I won’t forgive you-”

“I won’t.” He said firmly. “I hope you realize that I am actually not the bad guy here. It’s him. He’s the one dragging you into this whole controversy. He’s the one who’s going to destroy you if you don’t wake up.” He added as he moved closer to me. “I am not going to force you to leave him and like me instead because…I know that you’ll get tired eventually… of all the drama, of all the things people have to say about you, the stress, the consequences of your actions.” He paused to take a deep breath. “And when that happens, I’ll make sure I’ll be the one by your side.”

I was listening to his every word not paying much attention to his gesture that the next thing I knew, he was already so close to me. His face was inches away from mine and I felt suffocated with the minimal distance between us. He held my shoulders with his hands and my body twitched at the contact. I jumped off my feet, pushing him away from me.

He looked surprised when I pushed him but he recovered right away.

“You know I’m right Hae Won.” He told me. “And it’ll only be a matter of time before you realize that.”

I couldn’t look at him anymore. I was too upset to even pay him a glance. I couldn’t believe how complicated things have turned out between us. And I knew exactly what he was trying to do here. He was being subtle about it but I was certain he’s not really going to just sit and watch everything. I could only pray that he’d prove me wrong and be the good person that he had always been to me.

“Just leave Eun Chan.” I said, my voice above a whisper.

He didn’t move.

I didn’t wait for him to respond anymore. I turned around and walked away as I finally gave in to the heavy weight of my tears. The suffocating feeling resurfaced so I moved my legs faster.

I cried on my way home and I was thankful enough that there weren’t a lot of people on the streets. I felt bad and hopeless for a second. I thought about how I went back to Korea to stay away from the chaos of reality but somehow I ended up facing bigger and way more complex things here.

Is this the price I had to pay for being Byun Baekhyun’s girlfriend?

 

***

It was a good thing that the house was empty when I got back because I didn’t know how to explain why my nose was red from crying. I was lying on my bed, eyes fixed on the ceiling for a few minutes. I kept replaying Eun Chan’s words in my head.

 

“Do you really think this thing you have with Byun Baekhyun will work?”

“You know for a fact that it won’t work Hae Won. He is living in a different world from yours…from ours. A world you’re not used to. He’s surrounded by prying eyes and you being with him like this will only put you in a situation where people can easily criticize you.”

“You’ll get tired eventually…of all the drama, of all the things people have to say about you, the stress, the consequences of your actions. And when that happens, I’ll make sure I’ll be the one by your side.”

I knew for a fact that being in a relationship with Baekhyun would be a tough ride. I had seen this coming right? I even thought that I had already prepared myself for this but no, I learned that no matter how much you thought I’ve conditioned yourself, I’d end up feeling defenseless. I guess, I just have to trust Baekhyun. I had to keep the hope that we would be all right, that we would survive this together.

 

***

Ji Hye went home before dinnertime and she almost jumped at me showing the controversial Baekhyun-with-an-unknown-girl photos. And since I had the tendency to be so obvious, I lost count as to how many times I swallowed and bit my lips to keep my cool. I did my best to act nonchalantly as I listened to her rants. However, surprisingly, she wasn’t really against the possible relationship between Baekhyun and the girl he was with. She was more on worried about Baekhyun and what people might say about the issue. I had to even blink a few times to make sure that I was indeed hearing those sensible words from my teenage cousin.

I also felt sad that I wasn’t able to get her the Baekhyun album she asked me to buy for her. So, I promised that I would ask a friend in Seoul to get and have it delivered to us in a few days. Thankfully, she seemed to be okay with the idea.

***

8:30PM

When I got back to my room after dinner, I immediately went to my dresser where my phone was. I had been wanting to text Baekhyun but my hesitation to initiate conversation when we’re not together keeps getting in the way. I knew I should have gotten rid of this a long time ago but I guess it’s not that easy.

I should tell him about Eun Chan knowing all about us and that he’s also working for a broadcasting company. But where do I start? He already had a lot on his plate now. This information would just be too stressful for him. However, I knew for a fact that I shouldn’t keep this from him too.

Maybe I could tell him about this some other time. Maybe tomorrow. Or maybe the day after.

***

2:08AM

 

I woke up to my phone ringing on the bedside table. And just like what I usually do, I stretched an arm to grab it without lifting my head from the pillow. I sleepily brought the phone to my ear, totally forgetting answer the call first. So, I jerked when the ringtone almost left me deaf. Having no choice, I struggled to open my eyes to look at the screen of my phone.

BYUN

I checked the time on the upper right hand corner and my eyes grew big when I realized the time. Why was he calling me this early? Did something happen? 

“Baekhyun.” I muttered when I finally answered his call.

“Hey Baby.” His voice sounded so tired and sleepy.

“Are you okay?” I asked directly, unable to hide how worried I was at the moment.

“Yeah.” He answered as he let out of a soft laugh.

I was relieved when I heard his laugh. I moved to sit and rest my body against the headboard of my bed. I waited for him to say something but the line was silent for a few seconds.

“Why are you up at this time? Do you have a schedule?” I asked him breaking the silence.

“No, I don’t.” He answered softly. “I just…” There was a pause. “I know it’s selfish to call you and disturb your sleep but I just wanted to hear your voice.”

I couldn’t help but bite my lower lip upon hearing his words. His sweet remarks that never failed to give me butterflies. Oh, this man…really. He even knew what to say at two o’clock in the morning.

“Are you trying to make me miss you even more?” I asked him as trying my best not to giggle.

“Why? Is it working?”

“Totally.” I uttered, unable to let out of a gloomy sigh. 

Silence took over once more as we both refused to talk for a few seconds. I could slowly feel that familiar tug in my heart again as I thought of him being on the other line. He must be in his room now, laying comfortably on his bed. I remembered how soft his pillows were. How spacious his room was and just how he looked so beautiful that morning.

“Baby?” He called in a gentle but hesitant voice.

“Hmmm?”

“Can you get out of the house for me?” His voice was low and gentle.

He sounded so good when he said it that it took me a few seconds to process what he just said. I had to blink twice and asked myself if I heard it right. I heard it right, right?

“What?” It was all that I could muster.

“I thought hearing your voice would be enough but I was wrong.” He replied and he sounded so serious. Like he didn’t wanna give me even the slightest thought that he was kidding. “I even told myself to endure it until the morning but after talking to you…” He paused. “I’m sorry I couldn’t wait for a few more hours anymore.”

My mouth fell open while I listened to him. Was he serious?

“What exactly are you talking about?” I asked him unbelievably.

Yes, that was the best response I could come up with. 

“I’m right outside your house.”

“Is this supposed to be a joke Byun Baekhyun?”

“Don’t you want to see me?”

“I do.” I answered fast wanting him to drop the idea that I didn’t wanna see him immediately. “Of course I do Baek. In fact, I always want to see you. It’s just that…how could you be outside the house at two in the morning?”

I heard him chuckle on the other line. I could imagine his beautiful eyes turning into beautiful crescents as his signature smile paints his lips.

“Will you just come out already?”

***

It was just like the first time I sneaked out to meet him a month ago when he brought me stargazing. I made sure to make my steps light as a feather on my way out of the house. I wasn’t an expert at sneaking out and just because I successfully did it last time didn’t mean this wasn’t making me nervous as hell. No one had ever made me do it, except Baekhyun. And I guess he’s always going to be an exemption.

As I passed the flower shop, I braced myself for the bitter cold night. The strong winds brushed against my skin and I was pretty sure my nose would turn red at any moment. I should’ve worn a hoodie instead but of course it was already too late for me to go back inside. I was wearing a thick coat over my pajamas because I literally just jumped out of bed.

I saw his black Audi across the street. He was leaning against it with his both hands inside his pockets. Bucket hat and jacket on-

Wait! He was wearing the same clothes earlier today.

He looked at me and I did the same thing for a second. I checked the streets and made sure it was empty before I started to run towards him. I stopped right in front of him and as I looked at his face, I realized that he was battling with the cold just as I was. His nose, his cheeks and even his lips were already slightly red.

“Do you mind hugging me for body heat?” He asked, his playful smile making a sudden appearance.

The corner of my lips turned upwards right before I leaned towards him for a hug. I felt him wound his arms around me tightly, pulling me even closer. I closed my eyes at the warmth his body was exuding, which was one of the best things in the world.

“Ah this is nice…” I heard him say and I couldn’t agree with him more.

I knew we were together earlier today but it almost felt like I haven’t seen him in a week. It’s crazy though. How much I miss him this much everytime. I wasn’t so vocal about it but I was certain he knew just how I felt. He could read me very well. 

I was busy savoring the moment. His hug, his scent, the sound of his breathing, and just everything about him when I remembered what time it was. I leaned away from him as I tilted my head up to meet his wondering eyes.

“How are you still here?” I asked all of a sudden. “I mean…I mean I’m delighted you’re here with me now but…did you even go home?”

“Well…” He bit his lower lip, momentarily looking away. “I...I went to the hiking place and stayed there for a while…”

I stared at him incredulously and he probably saw it when he looked at me again so he continued to explain.

“Look, I didn’t wanna go home. I knew I had to face them again sooner or later because I don’t really have much choice but not today. Even just for a day. I didn’t want to be alone at home knowing that I’d have to think all about the mess or I could think about you which is inevitable of course…” He paused as he lifted a hand to my face. “And if I do that, I’d obviously end up missing you and wanting to see you.” He stuck his tongue to wet his lips just like he always did when he’s trying to make a point.

“You’re crazy.” I muttered as I felt my face heating while we continued to stare at each other.

“About you.” His reply was quick as he leaned down to plant a small kiss on my lips.

I did like the feel of his warm lips against mine for a second but knowing that we were outside freaked me out. I slightly hit him on his chest to make him stop.

He looked at me unbelievably. 

“We’re outside.” I reminded him strictly.

“No one’s looking.” He said in a matter of fact tone. “And this is not Seoul.” He added as he attempted to lean his face closer to mine again and would’ve end up claiming my lips once more if I wasn’t fast enough to pull his ear.

“Ow!” He exclaimed as he let go of me to attend to his hurt ear. “How dare you.” He said, pouting his mouth exaggeratedly.

I laughed and I had to cover my mouth to make sure I wouldn’t make any noise. This guy knew how cute he was and he just knew how to take advantage of it everytime. I was still laughing when he grabbed my hand, pulled me towards him for another hug.

“Love you.” There was gentleness and evident affection in his voice when he said it and I couldn’t help but close my eyes when I felt his lips on my head.

“Love you too.” I replied while I rested my head against his chest once more.

I didn’t have the slightest idea of what was gonna happen in the coming days but I guess I shouldn’t really dwell so much on what might or might not happen. This, this moment…what we have here right now was what matters the most. For now…

“Baby?”

“Hmm?”

“Can I be very honest with you right now?”

My forehead creased as I adjusted my head so I could see his face.

“I wanted to tell you this the moment I saw you but for some reasons I couldn’t…” He sounded so serious and I couldn’t really blame my heartbeat to start racing with the way he’s acting right now.

I stepped away from him to give him space and for me to listen to him intently. He tilted his head down for a moment before looking right back at me again. I felt nervous. My throat somehow suddenly felt dry. What was he going to say?

I was waiting for him to tell me what it was when his stomach growled. And my eyes grew big as I watched his hands making their way to his stomach. He looked a little embarrassed too as he shyly avoided my eyes for a brief moment.

“Well I guess you already know by now that I’m very…hungry, thanks to my growling stomach.” He stated looking like he was about to hit his stomach for giving him away. “I swear I’m going to faint any moment from now because of hunger.”

I almost choked at his confession and how it happened. And honestly, I didn’t know whether to laugh at him or scold him for staving himself.

I laughed, and I must be a bad girlfriend.

A fret took over his face. He started to act cutely again as he pretended to have a fake fainting-because-of-hunger moment. I walked closer to him again and cupped his face with my hands. He immediately stopped his attention drawing act when my skin touched his. The smile on my face disappeared when he placed his both hands over mine. His skin was so smooth, I couldn’t help but brush my thumbs against them. Handsome was an understatement when it came to Baekhyun. We were intently gazing at each other like it was the most natural thing to do under the crisp night.

“I’m gonna go get you something to eat before you faint.” I stated before I gave him a tight lipped smile.

He laughed and his soft laugh sounded like music to my ears. I absolutely love listening to it like how I love listening to his songs when we’re not together.

I removed my hands from his face as I stepped away from him to go back inside the house. I was certain I was just two steps away from him when he stopped me by holding my hand. My eyes fell on our connected hands before my attention reached his face.

“It’s very cold here.”

I had to think for three whole seconds before I got what he meant. He wanted to go inside with me. I’d like to think that he wasn’t serious at first but he never looked away. He just stood there, not moving a single muscle.

“Are you out of your mind? No.” I contradicted.

“I’ve been in the car since this afternoon. If I stay there for another hour, I’d lose my mind.” He reasoned out looking so helpless.

I took a deep breath as I tried to think properly. Of course, it would be a bad idea to bring him inside even though I was sure Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye were already sleeping. It’s still very risky.

“No no no…I can’t let you come with me Baek.” I insisted and just when I thought he’d argue more, he didn’t.

He slowly let go my hand before slumping. He turned around to walk towards his car. I didn’t know if he was doing this on purpose to get to me or what but I felt bad. I felt guilty. It was like I did something wrong, like I did hurt his feelings or something.

Oh gosh, I hate (not really) this man.

I marched towards him, grabbed his hand and without a word dragged him with me. He followed me without saying anything as well. I didn’t glance at him but I was certain he was grinning from ear to ear right behind me. We were about a few feet away from the main door when I finally turned to him.

“You have to promise me you’ll never make a sound.” I warned him, my voice just above a whisper.

He lifted his right hand, swearing that he’d do what I’ve asked him to do. I took a deep breath before we walked closer to the door. I unlocked the door as careful as I could before getting inside with Baekhyun tailing right behind me of course. The lights were off so it was a thousand times harder not to make a noise. He even stepped on my foot and I could only bit my lip in response, afraid that I might wake someone up.

I told him to take his shoes with him so he bent to pick them up before we blindly made our way inside the house. My heart was beating so loud behind my chest as I grabbed his hand to take him to my room first. I couldn’t believe we’re doing this. I couldn’t believe I was sneaking a celebrity inside our house at this time. I mean it wasn’t a crime really but I just couldn’t relax.

God please, let Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye dream of good things so they wouldn’t wake up to this. I prayed silently until we reached my bedroom’s door. We got in without being caught and it was the only time I was able to let myself breathe. I switched on the lights and it was just then I realized that I was still holding Baekhyun’s hands.

He was already checking my room. I immediately felt embarrassed since my room wasn’t that tidy. I even panicked a little while making sure that all my undergarments were safely locked in the closet.

“Your room’s pretty.” He commented. “I’m just a little frustrated you don’t have a poster of my face on the wall.” He added grinning.

I let out of a soft laugh as I finally loosen up a bit. I let go of his hand to take his shoes from him and placed it right behind the door. He, on the other hand, went to my bed to sit.

“So, this is where you think of me, huh?” He teased, his hands caressing the fabric of my beddings.

“Shut up Baekhyun.” I replied trying to stifle a smile.

He laughed at my reaction.

“Seriously, I’m a bit hurt. You really don’t have a single picture of me in your room?” This time, he continued to roam his attention around my room.

“If you’re looking for your posters, they’re all in my cousin’s room.” I replied as I stood in front of him. “And I can’t have your picture in here that would be too suspicious.”

“Come here…” He told me as he pulled towards him to sit on his lap.

He took my phone, which was right next to him on the bed, gave it to me before he asked me to unlock it. I was wondering what he was up to but I unlocked my phone anyway.

“Let’s take a picture together.”

“What?” For some reasons, I blushed. “No.”

He looked at me, baffled.

“We’re in my room Baekhyun.”

“That makes it more intimate.”

Hearing his last word made me blush even more, if that was possible. And he might have noticed it that he ended up laughing at me.

“I meant personal, more personal baby.” He said before lifting his hand to take a picture.

I tried my best to smile genuinely as he took the shots. He took about three pictures and I could only hope that I didn’t look so out of place on the photos because he looked absolutely good. He was Byun Baekhyun, there’s never a bad angle for him. I stood and stepped away from him as soon as he was done taking the pictures.

“We look good together.” He remarked while he was checking the photos. “We should take photos together more often.” He added happily.

“I think it’s not really a wise thing for us to do…” I told him before I could even stop myself.

He tore his attention away from my phone as he turned to me. His facial expression changed, his smile vanished right after he heard what I said.

“Y-yeah.” He stuttered. “You’re right. We shouldn’t.”

I was sure that his smile afterwards was forced. I knew my words got to him. It was as if he was shoving his hurt feelings aside just to avoid any arguments.

“I’m sorry.” I tilted my head down.

“No, it’s fine. You’re right anyway.” He stated nonchalantly while he put my cellphone down on the bed.

“Are you mad?”

“No.” He moved his head sideways as he stood to come near me, placed his hands on my shoulders and stared at me. “I’m just hungry.”

Oh right. We’ve spent too much time talking I forgot that I was supposed to get him something. I told him to wait for me in the room while I go to the kitchen to prepare something.

***

I didn’t have a choice but to turn on the lights in the kitchen. Honestly, I couldn’t really concentrate on what I was supposed to do because I was so nervous, my hands were even slightly trembling. This is scaring the daylights out of me. I kept looking behind me to make sure no one was there.

“Oh gosh Park Hae Won, you’re not gonna get anything done if you’re like this.” I scolded myself silently while I checked the cabinets.

I took several deep breaths before I continued searching for food. I found Ramen and I guess this was the best thing I could offer. I was like walking on eggshells, making sure I didn’t make any noise while I boil the water.

I went to the fridge and found a container full of Kimbop.

“I’m sorry Auntie, I’ll borrow this one for now.” I said as if I was really asking her permission.

I went back in front of the stove as I anxiously wait for the water to boil.

“Why is this taking so long?” I hissed impatiently.

I was unconsciously drumming my fingers on the table. I couldn’t believe I was making Ramen for Baekhyun at this time, at my Aunt’s house….not to mention, secretly. I was praying so hard that we’d get through this successfully and not do it again. This was like giving me a heart attack. I couldn’t relax. I couldn’t even breathe properly.

Then I thought about Baekhyun. It’s been more that fifteen minutes since I left him in my room. He must be very hungry now. I just hoped he hasn’t fainted yet.

I heard the water finally boiling. With my hands still slightly shaking, I poured the seasoning and added the noodles.

Now, I had to wait again-

“Eonnie?”

OH MY GOD.

 

I held my breath. I froze.

 

No. Please. No.

“Eonnie?”

Oh my god.

As if in slow motion, I turned around to the owner of the voice. My heart was beating wildly, I was rattling with the thought of Ji Hye standing right behind me. This must be the right time for me to ask for a miracle.

The 180 degrees turn that I made seemed to take like forever. And when I was finally able to complete it, a sleepy Ji Hye welcomed me. Her hair was sticking in all directions while she scrubbed her eyes with her hands.

“Ji…Ji Hye…” I stuttered unable to make my mind think coherently.

“What are you doing?” She asked before yawning.

“I’m…well, I’m…”

“Are you making ramen?”

I let out of a nervous laugh. “Yeah. Yes, I’m…I’m making ramen.” I replied trying to hold myself together because my heart was about to explode.

“Eonnie, your face is really red right now. Are you okay?” Ji Hye pointed out. “Are you sick? Is that why you’re making Ramen?”

I could only nod at her as I turned away from her to the ramen. I was checking if the noodles were already cooked when she appeared right beside me, her unexpected presence almost making me jump.

“Can I have some?” She asked, her attention on the ramen.

“Sure.” I nodded. “S..sure Ji Hye….of…of course.” I couldn’t stop stuttering.

Can you blame me though? My cousin who, I must note, liked Baekhyun very much was right in front of me right now while I make something for him. If she only knew that her idol was just a few feet away from her, she’d freak out.

Oh god, please don’t let Baekhyun do something crazy like show up in the kitchen right now. Let him fall asleep and forget how hungry he was. Or he could faint, like the real one, just don’t let Ji Hye see him.

When I was pouring the noodles into the bowl, I tried to casually talk to my cousin.

“Uh Ji Hye, it is okay for you to eat Ramen at this time?”

Yes, that was my idea of casual talk. 

“I guess so.” She shrugged. “You’re doing it too, so I think it’s all right, right Eonnie?” She asked, blinking a few times while she looked and waited for my response.

“Yeah… I guess so.” I answered.

I let out of another nervous laugh before I asked her to get another bowl. She obediently stood and went to where the bowls were stored.

I slightly slapped my forehead for not being careful enough. In fact, I just made the situation worse. This only meant, I had to stay here longer. I’d have to eat with Ji Hye in the kitchen otherwise it would be very suspicious. So, in the end, Ji Hye and I would be the ones to eat Baekhyun’s ramen.

“Is your mom sleeping?” That was so random, I know.

“Yeah. I guess.”

“Is she a deep sleeper?”

“I don’t really know, Eonnie. Maybe?” She replied, probably wondering what the hell I was talking about.

She was already standing in front of me, the bowl on her hand.

“Are you okay Eonnie?” She asked as I took the bowl from her.

“Your hand is shaking.” She pointed out while her eyes followed my hand.

Oh great. I couldn’t control the earthquake taking place inside me now. Can I be more obvious?

“Uh, sorry.” I muttered. “You’re right, maybe I don’t feel really well.”

“Let me get you a glass of water.” She offered.

I watched her get me a glass of water while I tried to think of a possible way to get out of this situation. But then, as if everything wasn’t as screwed as it already was. I heard footsteps coming from my room.

Oh god, no. NO BYUN BAEKHYUN. NOW’S NOT THE TIME TO SHOW YOUR HANDSOME FACE. 

I was pretty sure Ji Hye heard it too because she stopped midway and turned to where the footsteps were from.

“Baby, I’m so sorry but I’m really-” Baekhyun said as he appeared in the kitchen, where he shouldn’t be.

He looked just as shocked as we were. He stared at Ji Hye who had somehow already turned into a statue.

“Hungry.” He said finishing his statement, his face turned pale.

“O-oppa?” Ji Hye uttered, still in complete shock. I was sure she wasn’t even blinking.

Baekhyun turned to me, probably asking for help but I couldn’t think of anything anymore. I couldn’t even stand, I didn’t move a single muscle.

“Hi.” He replied as he awkwardly wave to Ji Hye.

The next thing I knew, the glass Ji Hye was holding fell on the floor, leaving a shattering sound.

I gasped, my hands finding their way on my mouth for cover.

 

This couldn’t be happening. No. No. No.  
I blinked my eyes a few times hoping that this was all just a dream but who was I kidding?

Ji Hye continued to stare at Baekhyun who I must guess, with the look on his face right now, was in panic mode just like I was.

Thirty seconds. Thirty seconds was what it took to make the situation even more complicated.

We all heard a door being opened. Baekhyun and I exchanged looks. I wanted to run to him but it was just too late.

I heard another pair of footsteps making its way to the kitchen. I closed my eyes and it was as if waiting for judgment.

“What’s going on here?” Aunt Sunny’s very curious voice filled the entire place.

She showed up, fresh from sleeping. She first saw Ji Hye who was the nearest to her, then she turned to me, who probably still looked appalled, then back to Ji Hye.

 

“What on earth is happening?” She asked once more, her eyes darted to the broken pieces of glass on the floor next to Ji Hye’s feet.

“Someone better speak up about the broken glass…” She trailed off, this time noticing Ji Hye’s reaction, who remained unmoving next to her. I saw how her forehead creased when she saw her daughter’s shocked facial expression. She followed her gaze and finally acknowledged somebody else’s presence in the room. Her eyes automatically grew big at the sight of him.

“Who…” She wasn’t able to finish her question because she turned to Ji Hye then back to Baekhyun once more. Her eyebrows furrowed as if she was trying to analyze something. After a few seconds, she must’ve have understood the look on her daughter’s face.

“B-Byun Baek-Hyun?!” She exclaimed, pointing a finger at him.

 

Great.

This was not what I had in mind when I agreed to let Baekhyun get inside the house.


	19. Chapter 19

Nineteen  
  
~♥~  
  
  
  


  
  
_Inhale.  
Exhale.  
Inhale.  
Exhale._  
  
I was trying to convince myself not to collapse because that would only make matters worse. My cousin and my aunt just found out that Baekhyun was inside the house and it’s a lot to take in.

We all spent a whole minute exchanging looks with each other, except for Ji Hye, whose gaze remained fixed at Baekhyun. I didn’t know what to do, in fact, I was scared. I wasn’t ready for this.

“I-I’m really sorry for…for waking you all up.” Baekhyun apologized breaking the ice, hesitantly bowing to Aunt Sunny.     
  
Aunt Sunny immediately turned to him and gave him an awkward smile but didn’t say anything in response to his greeting. She must be trying to process everything, just like I was.  
  
“Ji Hye?” She called her daughter but her eyes were on Baekhyun. “Is this your dream? Are we all part of your dream?” She asked consecutively before turning to Ji Hye. “Because it’s time for you to wake up.”  
  
For some miracle, Ji Hye was able to move her head sideways to respond to her mom’s ridiculous question. I couldn’t really blame her though. I couldn’t even believe this was all happening right now.  
  
“Hae Won.” I heard Auntie called me and it immediately sent shivers down my spine.  
  
I gulped, glancing at Baekhyun before I turned to meet Aunt Sunny’s eyes.  
  
“Can I have a word, please.” She sounded so serious like I’ve never heard before.  
  
 _Oh my god, this is it._  
  
I slowly and nervously stood while I felt Baekhyun’s eyes on me, watching my every move. I walked and met his eyes when I passed by him and for one moment there, he seemed like he was ready to grab me but he didn’t. I knew that he was also having a hard time. He even gave me a regretful look right before he tilted his head down.  
  
When I reached Aunt Sunny, she took me a few steps away from the kitchen, putting as much distance from Baekhyun and Ji Hye who remained at their respective spaces.  
  
I swear, I was breaking out in a cold sweat while I wait for Auntie to open her mouth to interrogate me. I wasn’t prepared for anything she’d be asking. I haven’t come up of an alibi. My head was purely thinking about how this night was such a mess.  
  
“Hae Won.” Auntie muttered, her eyes narrowing.  “What is Byun Baekhyun doing in my house?”  
  
I bit my lip as I turned to look at Baekhyun who was already staring at me.  
  
 _Should I just tell her the truth?_  
  
“Are you the one who brought him here?”  
  
I was still biting my lips when I nodded.  
  
“Do you know that he’s Byun Baekhyun?”  
  
I nodded once more, my clammy hands slightly trembling.  
  
“So, how did he end up being in my Kitchen?”  
  
I cannot deal with this. I cannot deal with this alone. I didn’t wanna lie to my Aunt but I didn’t want to put Baekhyun in a much bigger trouble. So, I forced my poor brain to come up with something right at the very moment.

"Auntie I promise, we'll explain everything to you later but for now…Can we please give him something to eat?" I pleaded. "He hasn't eaten anything since this afternoon."  
  
 _Yes, that was the best thing I could think of._  
  
Auntie looked like she was about to contradict but ended up sighing.  She was skeptical, I knew and I totally understand. She just woke up and this was like a bomb being thrown at her. Her eyes searched mine and I wasn’t really sure if she was trying to read me or what. Maybe she did and maybe she saw the desperation in my eyes that caused her to finally agree with me.  
  
“Okay.” She agreed. “But you’d better explain what that handsome young man is doing here.” She told me and there was strictness in her voice.  
  
I gulped as I nodded for the third time.  
  
***  
  
We went back to the kitchen and I stopped right next to Baekhyun which I realized was a wrong move because I saw Aunt Sunny giving us a suspicious look.  
  
“T-take a seat.” I told Baekhyun after clearing my throat.  
  
I wasn’t sure but maybe he didn’t hear me well because he didn’t move. So, I grabbed him by the hand and led him towards the table so he could sit on one of the chairs. I reached for the bowl of ramen which was on my right and gave it to him. I was about to hand him the chopsticks when Aunt Sunny interrupted me.  
  
“No. Don’t eat that.” She ordered.  
  
Baekhyun and I turned to her at the same time.  
  
“You’re someone very famous, we can’t just give you ramen.” She stated right before she walked towards the fridge.  
  
“It’s fine, please don’t bother-” Baekhyun tried to reason out politely but couldn’t finish his sentence when Auntie started taking out several containers from the fridge.  
  
“Let me make something for you.” Auntie told him. “It’ll be quick.”  
  
Baekhyun could only nod in response but I saw how his attention sadly fell on the ramen in front of him. I knew he was very hungry so I took the ramen out of his sight before he could start munching it out and forget Auntie’s offer. The last thing we should do was to aggravate her and make the situation messier. _Not that it wasn’t already though._  
  
I gazed at Baekhyun worriedly and he must have gotten how I felt.  
  
“Don’t worry, I’ll try my best not to faint yet.” He said almost whispering and I almost punched him in the face for trying to make me laugh.  
  
I knew that he was trying to get me to relax but I couldn’t help but recall his fake fainting acting a while ago. My face went hot trying to control myself both from hitting him and laughing at his remarks.  
  
Then… I noticed Ji Hye. My poor cousin who was still standing right in front of us. _My gosh, did she even move a muscle since she laid eyes on Baekhyun?_  
  
I immediately walked towards her.  
  
“Ji Hye…are you okay?”  
  
She didn’t answer.

“Hey…” I called once more, this time holding her arms. “Are you okay?” I pinched her lightly, scared that she’s going to space out for a very long time.  
  
I was relieved when she finally tore her attention away from Baekhyun to me. Honestly, I kind of panicked a bit when she looked at me. I wasn’t ready with anything she might say or ask. I remembered how she told me that the woman Baekhyun was with on the photos looked like me. How could I ever explain all of these to her? I didn’t want her to think that I purposely lied to her.  
  
“Let me clean this up for you.” I told her as I bent to start cleaning.  
  
***  
  
3:43AM

  
The four of us were all seated on the dining table. I was sitting next to Baekhyun while Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye were  in front of us.  
  
Auntie sure prepared something delicious for Baekhyun. There were also several side dishes which I was certain Baekhyun would really enjoy. After thanking Aunt Sunny for what she had prepared for him, I urged him to start eating. He did but since we were watching him intently, he became really conscious. He glanced at me but I only gave him an apologetic smile because there was really nothing I could do. I couldn’t tell them to stop staring at him.  
  
About five minutes after, he seemed to have forgotten the pairs of eyes watching him and started to focus on eating. He was eating so fast that I had to tell him to slow down a bit.  
  
Then I noticed how Ji Hye’s eyes switched from Baekhyun and me repeatedly. She did it a few times like she was trying to figure something out.

_Oh my gosh. This kid is smart so I wouldn’t be surprised if…_  
  
“Mom…”  
  
My heartbeat started to beat wildly the moment she called for her mother. Auntie, on the other hand turned to her right away.  
  
“I think he’s Eonnie’s boyfriend.” She said in a very straightforward manner.  
  
I was so surprised but I didn’t have much time to entertain my own feelings when I noticed Baekhyun choking right next to me. He must have been more surprised, with food inside his mouth.

I rattled as I handed him a glass of water. He was coughing a few times so I started rubbing his back with my hand. I glanced back at Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye who looked so worried and saw how they looked relieved when Baekhyun recovered.  
  
His face was really red as he ran his fingers through his hair absolutely looking startled just as I was because of Ji Hye’s unexpected remarks.  
  
“What are you talking about Ji Hye?” Auntie asked her daughter incredulously. “How is that even possible?”  
  
“I’m sure Mom.” She replied indeed sounding really confident. “He even called her ‘baby’.”  
  
I swallowed hard.

Meanwhile, Baekhyun hastily grabbed the glass of water once more and emptied it this time.  
  
 _Could the two of us be more obvious?_  
  
***  
  
It turned out, Auntie wasn’t also prepared for what could be revealed the moment we have a proper conversation. She must have also noticed that Baekhyun looked so tired. I was sure that Auntie was being considerate towards him considering that he’s someone famous. She didn’t want to harass him with questions. And I couldn’t be more thankful because I was a hundred percent sure that I would just end up stuttering all throughout.

  
So, right after Baekhyun was done eating. She offered him some of my Uncle’s clothes he could use for sleeping. She even offered him an extra toothbrush. He tried to politely refuse at first but Auntie insisted. I was relieved at how hospitable she was. This was a thousand times better than what I’d imagine. I mean, Auntie has good heart but I didn’t expect her to be this accommodating towards him. But then again, we shouldn’t really be lax because of her kindness. She hadn’t heard the whole thing yet. Worst case scenario, she’d freak out after knowing the whole story, yell at me and tell me how stupid I was for being with someone like Baekhyun and who knows, maybe tell my parents about all of these.  
  
 _No. Gosh, no. Not that. Please._  
  
Auntie told Ji Hye to go back inside her room. Of course she didn’t like it so Auntie had to literally drag her away from us. She was going through a lot. I mean, imagine unexpectedly meeting your long time idol. Her ultimate dream just to attend one of his concerts. So, seeing and having him a few feet from her must be so hard to digest.

“By the way, where is he going to sleep?” Auntie asked curiously the moment she came back to us again.  
  
Baekhyun, who was holding the toothbrush and the clothes she gave him, looked at me somehow trying to signal me to answer her question.  
  
“Is he gonna sleep in your room?” She asked once more, her forehead creasing.  
  
“Uh…” I hesitated. “Yes Auntie…but…” I paused trying to pressure my brain to come up with a decent reply. “He’s uhm…going to sleep on the floor Auntie.”  
  
“What?”  
  
Auntie and Baekhyun chorused. Two pairs of eyes looking unbelievably at me. And it was just then I realized how crazy the idea of making Byun Baekhyun sleep on the floor was.  
  
“I mean-” I tried to reason out but Baekhyun intercepted.  
  
“It’s okay.” He told Auntie. “It’s fine with me. It’s just for a few hours anyway.”  
  
“No, that’s just so wrong.” Auntie protested. “We can’t let you sleep on the floor. My god, the whole country is going to mock us for doing that.” She argued. “Why don’t you just take Hae Won’s room? She can sleep with Ji Hye tonight.”  
  
Since I was staring at him, I saw just how much he didn’t like the idea. He turn to me again probably asking for a little support but what would I say? It would sound so weird if I was to insist to stay with him.     
  
“I… I really appreciate your concern Mrs. Lee but it’s really fine. Don’t worry about me. Honestly, I like sleeping on the floor.” He insisted. “In fact, I do it a lot at home.”  
  
 _My jaw dropped. I couldn’t believe he just said that. He must be nuts._  
  
Auntie looked baffled because of what he just said. She opened her mouth to say something but ended up closing it anyway. My eyes were fixed on her when I felt Baekhyun move closer to me. Auntie’s eyebrows furrowed since she was observing us the whole time so she probably saw that. And the truth was, I couldn’t help but hold my breath because it almost felt like she was ready to scold me right at the very moment.  
  
“Okay.” She surprisingly agreed. “Just promise me that you won’t-”  
  
“Oh no!” I exclaimed without letting her finish what she was about to say. “We’re not gonna do that Auntie. I swear!” I added being fully aware of what she meant.  
  
Heat took over my face as I tried to process my thoughts. I couldn’t believe Auntie asked us not to do _that_ in my room _._  
  
“I mean promise not to let anyone know that we let him sleep on the floor.” Auntie said looking so confused because of what I just blurted out.  
  
Her clarification was like a slap on my face. Of course, she wouldn’t want to let anyone know we let him sleep on the floor. He’s Byun Baekhyun for heaven’s sake!  
  
 _Oh my god, I should really avoid jumping into conclusions._  
  
I bit my lip in embarrassment and accidentally turned to Baekhyun and saw that he was trying his best to stifle a smile. _I wanted to punch his pretty face._  
  
“Okay Auntie.” I told her.  
  
Baekhyun nodded. “I promise not a single soul will know I slept of the floor.” He stated and for the first time smiled at her.  
  
I saw how Auntie blinked in slow motion when he did that.  
I couldn’t blame her.  
Baekhyun’s smile was blinding.  
  
“Don’t smile like that to my daughter.” She instructed, pointing a finger at his face.  
  
Baekhyun’s signature smile slowly disappeared.  
  
“I’m pretty sure she’s gonna lose her mind.” She added, ending her statement with a subtle smile.  
  
The soft expression on her face somehow eased up the tension between the three of us. I just really hope everything would turn out fine after we tell her everything. _Please._  
  
***  
  
Baekhyun and I made our way to my room as soon as Auntie went back to her room. I was walking ahead of him and when I was about to open the door, he said something that made me blush so hard.  
  
“Are you sure we’re not really doing it?” He asked, teasing me.  
  
I held my breath as I turn around to face him and it was his beautiful grin that welcomed me right away. I knew he was just kidding but my face just wouldn’t stop from heating. I couldn’t even talk. I just stared at him, my lips would part at the attempt to argue but I was dumbfounded. I was amazed at his ability to come up with questions that would totally embarrass me. He was just so good at it. So good, I wanted to kick him right now.  
  
When he realized that he caught me off guard, he let out of a soft laugh.  
  
“I’m just kidding.” He told me, his crazy smile in full display.  
  
“Gosh Baekhyun, stop trying to give me a heart attack.”  
  
“Okay, okay Baby.” He replied, still laughing. “I’m sorry.”

  
  
***  
  
I was on my bed, restless as I wait for him to get out of the bathroom. I already had his sleeping mat set up for him on the floor right next to my bed. I could hear the shower from where I was sitting and I couldn’t help but feel anxious.  
  
 _He wasn’t gonna get out wearing a towel, right?_ I really hope he wouldn’t. My heart was not in a very good condition after everything that took place tonight.  
  
I hopped off the bed and walked back and forth inside my room.  
  
 _“Why am I doing this exactly?”_ I asked myself.  
  
I didn’t really know why. I mean, this wasn’t the first time that we’re going to share the same room but I was just so nervous right now. Maybe because I wasn’t fully aware the first time. Yes, I was drunk and I didn’t know what was happening that time, so this was totally different.   
  
I stopped in front of my vanity table to check my face and found out that I looked like a strawberry already. I automatically fanned my hands on my face while I try to breathe in and out. I was doing the same thing for the next couple of minutes when I heard him turn off the shower. My body twitched as I ran towards my bed. I hastily covered myself with my blanket, debating whether to have my eyes open or closed and pretend to fall asleep.  
  
He came out about after three minutes. I closed my eyes immediately, obviously choosing the “pretend sleep” option. I heard him shut the door slowly, his footsteps nearing. I felt him stopped right next to my bed and I was a hundred percent sure that he was staring at me right now.  
  
“Hey Baby, are you really sleeping?” He asked.  
  
 _Of course. I didn’t answer. I was supposed to be sleeping._  
  
I heard his footsteps move away from where he was standing but to my surprise felt him climbing on the bed the next second.  
  
My mind stopped working. I froze inside. Especially when I felt him already lying next to me. He was so close, our arms touching.  
  
“Did you seriously fall asleep without me?” His voice was gentle when he asked the second time.  
  
I knew what he was doing exactly. He was trying to get me to wake up and I was barely holding up. In fact, I was already trying my best not to open my eyes.  
  
“I know you’re still awake baby.” He said, touching the tip of my nose and I _almost,_ almost opened my eyes.  
  
He moved right next to me, this time adjusting his position until there was no space left between us. And to my surprise, he put an arm and a leg over my body. His weight affected my breathing but then I didn’t move. I still refuse to _wake up._  
  
“Hmmm…you’re so cuddly.” He stated as he seemed to purposely tighten his arm around me. He did the same thing with his leg as I felt him kiss me on the cheek.  
  
I tried so hard to put up with what he was doing but it was getting more and more uncomfortable. I couldn’t breathe properly anymore, leaving me with no choice so, my eyes flew open and directly met his.  
  
“See.” He uttered. “I knew you’re not sleeping yet.” He added sounding so triumphant.  
  
“Okay. I’m not.” I replied as I struggled to break free from him.  
  
He laughed at me while he get up to sit. I remained lying on the bed and it must have been a very wrong move because his eyes bore into mine. I got conscious right away, aware that I would start blushing again any moment from now.  
  
“You’re so beautiful.” He uttered, his voice filled with affection.  
  
I didn’t know how to handle his compliment so I hastily sat next to him. I was trying to brush my hair with my fingers to fix it when I felt his eyes on me.  
  
I was just so conscious. I mean, he’s my boyfriend and all but I am not used to have his handsome face in my room. Not to mention, on my bed.  
  
I cleared my throat. “You should probably sleep now Baek.” I reminded him. “You need rest.”  
  
“Yeah.” He agreed but didn’t move a muscle.  
  
“Yeah, but you’re sleeping right over there…” I told him, pointing at the mattress on the floor.  
  
He chuckled.  
  
“You said you like sleeping on the floor. That you always do it at home.” I added and I couldn’t help but smile.  
  
He continued to laugh softly as he moved his head sideways. He also slowly got off the bed to transfer to his designated place for tonight. I saw him lie on his back and closed his eyes and I couldn’t help but gaze at him.  
  
“You should stop staring at me or else…” He teased, opening a single eye to peak at me before one corner of his lips turned upward. “Or else…I’m gonna drag you here beside me.”  
  
“Just go to sleep Baekhyun.” I said right before I turned around to lie on my bed with my back facing his direction.  
  
I unconsciously nibbled my right thumb as it was still very hard for me to calm my crazy heartbeat. I think that I haven’t been this conscious around him before. Maybe because of the thought that we were inside my Auntie’s house and that they’re just a few meters away from us. But seriously, I should find a way to relax so I could finally go to sleep.  
  
I guess the real question was, _would I be able to do that?_  
  
I did it for about a whole three minutes while wondering if he had finally fallen asleep since I couldn’t hear any movements from him. I waited for another minute before I was able to muster enough courage to turn around to check on him.  
  
I did it slowly. Carefully, as if he was an infant I shouldn’t wake. So, right after I rolled over to the other side of my bed, I brought my upper body to sit so I could take a peek.  
  
And to my surprise, it wasn’t a soundly sleeping Baekhyun who welcomed me. His eyes were open and they immediately met mine. It even seemed like he never closed his eyes for once. He was lying on his back at first but rolled to one side so he was facing me completely.  
  
 _I froze. Of course. And honestly, I already lost count as how many times I did it today._  
  
I expected him to make fun of me because he caught me checking on him but he didn’t. He just continued to stare at me with sleepy eyes. It was quite a sight actually. He looked so handsome all sleepy and tired. Then I realized, Aunt Sunny was right, I shouldn’t have let him sleep on the floor. He looked so misplaced there. He should be sleeping on the bed. So, I decided to ask him for us to switch places but then I wasn’t even able to open my mouth yet when he stretched both of his arms up as if asking for a hug.  
  
“Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?” He asked, his voice, though it lacks his usual energetic tone still sounded like music to my ears.  
  
The expression on his face was so soft I couldn’t help but feel warm.  
  
“Please. I just want to feel you right beside me.” He pleaded, sweetly.  
  
 _Oh this man._ He’s such a genius when it comes to his words. He’s so good that I just slowly got off my bed and moved to where he was. And in a matter of seconds, I was already inside his arms. I rested my head on one of his arms while I pin my hands next to his chest.  
  
 _God. He smells so good. I don’t exactly know if I could survive this._  
  
“I just love…cuddling with you…like this.” I heard him mumbling right through my hair.  
  
 _I do too. I do too. I do too._ My mind chanted silently since my lips were almost touching his chest already right after he pulled me closer. We were so close, there weren’t any distance left between us but I didn’t feel suffocated. It actually felt very comfortable. His breathing was in sync with mine and I loved how his warmth seemed to lull me to sleep.  
  
“Thank you…” He muttered.  
  
 _Why was he thanking me all of a sudden?_  
  
I moved away from him a little and he might have gotten the signal that I wanted to look up to see his face so he loosened his hold around me.  
  
I looked at him straightaway but his eyes were closed.

“For what?” I asked.

Upon hearing my voice, the corner of his lips turned upward but his eyes remained shut.  
  
“For choosing me….for not leaving…” He answered as he brushed my hair with his fingers. “For being strong…” He trailed off as he finally opened his eyes to look at me intently.  “For trusting me.”  
  
My heart felt so warm because of his words. Of course, he didn’t have to thank me because I wholeheartedly chose to stay with him. But then again, letting me know that he’s grateful made my heart flutter. _Even more._  
  
“Love you.” It was the only thing I had in mind.  
  
“Love you too, baby.” He replied right away.  
  
“Go to sleep now.” I told him gently, my right hand making its way to his face.  
  
I smiled at how he reacted to my touch. He momentarily closed his eyes with a subtle smile on his lips the instant our skin made contact.  
  
“I will…” He trailed off as he reached for my chin before tilting my head up. “But I’ll have to kiss you goodnight first.”  
  
My heart didn’t have time to overreact anymore because his lips were gently pressed against mine now. It was just a quick kiss.  
  
“You smell so good.” He stated, his lips just an inch over mine.  
  
 _I blushed. Of course, it had already been a natural response to anything he says or does._  
  
He then resumed brushing my hair with his fingers, his eyes boring into mine. I watched how the expression on his face shifted from soft to something else. His glistening eyes were now filled with desire and it immediately sent shivers down my spine. I wasn’t sure how to describe it was as if every inch of my body became aware of the close proximity between us. His stare, his hand on my hair, even the way his lips part as I focused on them were making me feel things.  
  
I bit my lip wanting to distract myself from what was happening to me when he, without warning, sent his warm lips colliding with mine once more. This time, his kiss wasn’t soft anymore. It was needy…it was kind of intruding. Then his hands found their way to my neck, his thumbs tracing my jawline.  
  
I had my eyes closed the whole time because I was sure that I wouldn’t survive this if they weren’t. But then it just magnified everything, all the sensations our kiss was giving me. My head started to spin as I became fully aware of the heat emanating from my skin.

_Of course,_ I was kissing him back because I’d be a fool if I didn’t. I concentrated on nothing but his lips. The way it grazed against mine, just the way how they felt so smooth and the way he was easily leading the kiss right now. _Well, all the time if I’d have to be very honest._   

_Oh my god._ My mind screamed silently when he broke the kiss only to swiftly shift his position and ended up being on top of me. I literally held my breath. _What was he doing?_  
  
He was looking down at me, his gaze exploring every inch of my face. I rattled a bit and became conscious at first but as I did the same thing, I somehow forgot being shy. His arms were on either side supporting his weight. Then he brought his fingers on my face to brush my hair and tuck them behind my ear.  
  
Everything. I swear, every little things he did seem to magnetize me. From the way his fingers grazed my lips, my chin, and my jawline to my ear then down my neck. He stopped there as he brought his eyes back to meet mine once more.  
  
My heart started to pound like crazy again when I saw him swallow, making his Adam’s apple move. My throat suddenly felt dry, so I parted my lips a little. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and swallowed once more. I wasn’t so certain but it seemed like he was stopping himself. I could feel how fast his heart was beating at the moment too. Then he opened his eyes and let out of a smirk.  
  
“It would have been easier if you told me to stop already.” He stated with a crazy smile on his lips right before he got off me to lie on his back right next to me.  
  
I blinked my eyes a couple of times facing the ceiling while trying to process what he just said because I just got back to my senses. _Did he just imply that I got carried away? That I liked it? That I wanted it?  
  
Was he right though?_  
  
I turned to look at him who had his eyes closed but with the corner of his lips up.  
  
 _Gosh, this man._  
  
He must have felt me staring because he opened his eyes and turned to me, his smile never leaving his face. Then he moved, bringing his body closer to mine before wrapping his left arm over my stomach. And without a word, kissed my shoulder.  
  
“Goodnight baby girl.”  
  
  


~♥~  
  
  
 _AN: This chapter solely focuses on Baekhyun and Haewon because they deserve it, right? ♥_

Forgive me for the typos. I'll go check them out later. I just wanted to give you an earlier update. ^^

 


	20. Twenty

Twenty  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
  


9:12 AM  
  
It was that familiar fragrant manly scent that caught my attention the moment I woke up, making me fully aware of his presence in my room _, inside my arms._ My eyes were still closed but my other senses were slowly becoming aware of my surroundings. I could feel his body next to mine, his arm around my waist, his face buried against my neck, with his lips slightly touching my skin. How his soft lips ended up that close to my neck, I didn’t really know. All I knew was the fact that we were snuggling against each other perfectly right now.  
  
I would’ve wanted to sleep more on a morning like this. It was cold and the warmth his body was giving me enticed me to go back to sleep right away. It was like sitting in front of the fireplace on a wintry day but a thousand times better. _Okay, maybe I was exaggerating but that’s how I exactly feel at the very moment.  
  
Yah, Paek Hae Won, would you please behave yourself? You’re at your Aunt’s house! _My kill joy subconscious just knew how to burst my bubble.  
  
I opened my eyes and was welcomed by the instant realization that everything was indeed real. Not that I thought I was dreaming, though I still have the tendency to think that way. I leaned my head away a little so I could take a peek of his sleeping face and found him definitely looking at peace. 

Then, as if Baekhyun got a signal, he moved. He brought an arm right over my waist to gently pull me closer.  
  
“Baek…we need to wake up… We’re at my aunt’s house.” I informed him.  
  
He murmured something in a way that only a baby would understand.  
  
“Baek… We have to go talk to her now. She must be waiting.” I reminded him once more.  
  
He groaned.  
  
“But I like this...” He protested sounding like a total baby while he buried his face against my neck.  
  
“Baekhyun…” I scolded him, slightly trying to remove his hand over my waist but he resisted _of course._  
  
“But I love you.” He reasoned out and I could clearly imagine him pouting until I felt his soft lips making contact with my skin for a brief moment.

I paused and swallowed at the realization that he just kissed my neck but he didn’t seem to give attention to my reaction because he even pulled me closer to him even though there was absolutely zero space between us already.

“Baek-” I tried to talk him out of it but ended up being cut when he leaned away a bit so he could meet my eyes.  
  
“You know, you’re supposed to tell me you love me too. Right?” He said in a matter of fact tone, one eyebrow up and ending his statement with a slight pout. “Unless you don’t.”  
  
 _Gosh, how could this man be all grown up and still be this adorable?_

“Ugh, stop being cute Baekhyun.” I replied sounding a bit more amused than annoyed, _actually._ “But yes, I love you.” I added, obviously falling for his antics.  
  
“Of course you do.” His pretty lips forming into a proud and crooked smile.  
  
 _Oh god, what is going on inside his head again?_ I got a little scared while I recalled what happened last night. Especially when he- _Oh gosh_ , I could feel my face blushing again. So, before he could even make a crazy move, I slightly pushed him away from me so I could get up. I was already sitting and was about to stand on my feet when he pulled me back to him once more.  
  
In a blink of an eye, my upper body landed on top of him, our faces were inches way from each other, leaving our noses almost touching. My heart, of course started to beat exaggeratingly, perfectly paired with my already heating face as our eyes met. His hand let go of my wrist to gently brush his fingers against my hair, tucking them behind my ear. Then he proceeded to caress my cheek delicately. It felt so good, I had to close my eyes to appreciate and savor the moment.  
  
“What have you done to me?” He asked softly, causing me to instantly open my eyes.  
  
His beautiful brown orbs met mine for a second before he darted his attention to my lips then to the other parts of my face. His other hand found its way on my face as well, perfectly cupping my face with his both hands now.  
  
“It’s crazy how I can’t stay still at a place that’s miles away from you for so long.” He paused, a subtle smile on his lips. “All I could think about is you. How you smile shyly while you blush, your voice and even just the way you say my name.” He added, his eyes never leaving mine. “I hate not being able to talk freely about you. I hate not being with you.”  
  
“I hate it too.” I muttered absent minded but meaning every word.  
  
I was so drawn to him right now that the next thing I did was to press my body against him for a hug. Unfortunately, _or maybe fortunately_ , totally forgetting about getting out of the bed.  
  
I appreciate the fact that he’s being all honest and how straightforward he was when it comes to how he felt about me. And for one moment there, it warmed my heart. I didn’t understand but it also kind of made me sad that I even felt like crying. But then again, as if the universe wanted to remind us that we are in an inappropriate situation, there came several knocks on the door.  
  
My body jerked as I automatically, _lacking so much grace_ , moved away from Baekhyun to stand on my feet. I brushed my hair away from my face trying my best not to panic before straightening my pajamas, my head filled with the thoughts of Aunt Sunny at the doorstep.

Baekhyun, on the other hand, was still lying and seemed to have frozen on the floor. My eyes widened as I asked him what he was doing.  
  
“Well, what should I do?” He answered quickly, making sure his voice was low and wouldn’t be heard by the person at the door.

“I don’t know just…just…” I hesitated, unable to come up with something. “just…”  
  
He was looking at me, forehead slightly creasing as he waited for my words.  
  
“I don’t know-” I gave up.  
  
 _Knocking._  
  
I hurried to the door and the moment I had my hand latched on the knob, I glanced at Baekhyun and found him with his eyes closed, evidently resorting to pretend sleeping.  
  
I took one last breath before finally opening the door and to my surprise, it wasn’t Auntie. It was Ji Hye. It was just her but for some reasons, my heart still pounded at the sight of her looking up at me, her eyes full of questions. She had a backpack and seemed ready to go somewhere.  
  
“J-Ji Hye…” I stuttered.

“Eonnie.” She muttered, still staring at me.  
  
I looked away because somehow I felt guilty.  
  
“I’m about to go to my academy class but is it okay if I talk to you before I leave?” She asked, her voice was soft… even sad. _Maybe?_  
  
“Yeah.” I replied. “Of course.”  
  


I paid a glance at Baekhyun who had his eyes opened now, looking a little worried before I finally stepped out of the room to talk to Ji Hye. I closed the door right behind me and wasn’t that prepared to face her yet when she spoke.  
  
“Eonnie, why did you lie to me?” There was evident hurt in her voice and it made my heart ache a little.

I tilted my head down, already feeling anxious.  
  
“Ji Hye…I’m sorry.” I struggled to say when I met her eyes. “I…I didn’t mean to lie to you. It’s just that I didn’t know what to do. No…the truth was, I was scared that you’d know about this.”  
  
“Why?” She asked innocently.  
  
“Because…” I paused to take a deep breath.  “Because he’s Byun Baekhyun. He’s someone very famous. And the fact that you’re his number one fan makes it so hard.”

“Why is it hard?”

 I sighed before opening my mouth for a response.  
  
“I didn’t want to freak you out and I just don’t know how to tell you or your mom.”  
  
She was silent for seconds and seemed to process what I had just told her.

“So...so that was you.” She stated. “The one on the pictures.”  
  
I nodded.  
  
Then, she looked like crying.  
  
 _Oh my god._  
  
“Ji Hye…I’m sorry.”  
  
“Do you love him?”  
  
I nodded.  
  
“Does he love you?”  
  
I gulped.  
  
“Well…he tells me he does…” I trailed off when I heard the door behind me being opened.  
  
I saw how Ji Hye’s eyes widened and I was sure that it was because of the appearance of his favorite celebrity.  
  
“I do.” I heard him say and my heart almost skipped a beat.  
  
 _Had he been listening all this time?_  
  
I felt him stood next to me, facing my cousin too.  
  
“I love her.” He said and I was certain that he was gazing at me but I refused to look at him because I was busy concentrating on the heat spreading all over my face.

Ji hye was back to not moving a single muscle since she laid eyes on Baekhyun again _. Oh, this poor thing._ I guess it would take her a very long time to get used to his presence.

“Is it okay if I talk to you,” he hesitated. “Ji Hye?”  
  
My cousin gasped, bringing a hand to cover her mouth and spent a whole second shocked before she looked at me.  
  
“Eonnie, did he just say my n-name?” She asked, stuttering a bit.  
  
“I guess.” I muttered with a small smile.  
  
She turned to Baekhyun once more and nodded as a response to his question. Baekhyun bent his legs so could have the same eye level with her.  
  
“What I’m about to tell you is very personal to me. Would you like to hear it?”  
  
I watched her nod once more as I also grew curious about what he was going to tell her.  
  
“I met your Eonnie up at the old hiking place. I always go there when I have time to spare. I loved that place because I used to go up there with a friend when I was about a few years older than you are.” He started as he paid a glance at me, probably asking for permission to go on.  
  
When I nodded, he turned to my cousin again.  
  
“So that day when I first saw her, I was beyond surprised that there was someone up there too because I thought the whole time that I had the place to myself. Then some _unexpected things_ happened and I got hurt.” I swore, I saw the corner of his lips turned up, probably recalling my stupid act of thinking that he was going to jump.  
  
That scene always made me feel uncomfortable. _It always does._  
  
“She wanted to help me. At first I was hesitant to let her do it because I should keep my identity a secret. But then, there was something different about her. She didn’t seem to recognize me even after seeing my face. She freaked out but I guessed it was because of my handsome face…” He smiled crookedly that made Ji Hye smile a bit too.  
  
I almost rolled my eyes but seeing how engrossed Ji Hye was to his story made me forgive him because he was right, _actually._ I remembered how I gasped after seeing his bare face.  
  
“Later, she told me that she just came from Australia and didn’t really know who I was. I was relieved and certain at that time that it felt so good to be with someone who didn’t recognize me. It was a rare experience. So, I didn’t tell her my name because I secretly hoped that she wouldn’t find out who I really was.” He stopped to run his fingers through his hair and wet his lips. “I kept glancing at her that time...of course I was trying so hard not to get caught because I knew she was doing the same thing too.” He let out of a soft laugh and I almost hit him for his confidence.  
  
Ji hye seemed amused and smiled as she looked at me for a brief moment.  
  
“There was something else I was sure of that time…” Baekhyun said, getting her full attention again. “I liked her.” He took a deep breath. “Even though it was the first time I ever saw her. So, I prayed and prayed that I would see her again but then it took us about a month to finally meet for the second time. She said she found out who I am and started to act really awkward around me. She was acting like the way you acted when you saw me last night, though she didn’t freeze.” He smiled at her. “Maybe because she wasn't really my number one fan.”  
  
Ji Hye blushed at his statement and it made Baekhyun smile widely.  
  
“I guess what I’m trying to tell you is…” He sounded serious but gentle as he spoke to her once more. “Please don’t get mad at your Eonnie.”  
  
 _His words moved me. This was the first time I ever heard him talk about me to someone._  
  
“She didn’t do anything wrong. She didn’t tell you and your mom about us because of me. It’s not because she doesn’t trust you, she just didn’t want to jeopardize my reputation. It’s just the way it is for us celebrities. And I knew it was hard for her, keeping all of these from you and her family and the fact that she’s so brave and is willing to go all through these makes me love her even more.”  
  
The expression on Ji Hye’s face started to change, she looked like she was about to cry now and I was alarmed when I saw her already crying, her tears rolling down her cheeks. I bent my knees next to Baekhyun and held Ji Hye by the arm.

 “I want to be with her Ji Hye.” Baekhyun added as he lifted a hand to wipe her tears.  
  
She stopped breathing. I was sure she did, she even looked at him with large eyes.  
  
“Will you help me?” He asked in a way that sounded like he was subtly begging.  
  
My heart hammered at the anticipation. I bit my lip as I became observant of my cousin’s actions. Then I saw her relax and went back to breathing properly and finally managed to nod.    
  
I sighed. Relief taking over me. _Thank God._  
  
“I’m not…I’m not really mad at Eonnie.” She said for the first time while darting her attention to me. “I just couldn’t believe it at first. Though, I was hurt she didn’t tell me about it when I ranted about how the girl on the photos looked like her but I think I get it now. I think I know why she did that.” She momentarily paused to glance at me then back to Baekhyun. “The truth is, I think you two look really cute together.”  
  
Baekhyun’s signature smile made an appearance as his eyes formed into beautiful crescents.  
  
“You think so?” He asked once more.  
  
“Yeah.” She replied, wiping her eyes.  
  
“I think so too.” He agreed with her and offered his hand for a hi-five which Ji Hye gladly took.  
  
“I have another favor to ask.” He said a few seconds after.  
  
She nodded energetically.  
  
“Can we make this our little secret?”  
  
She seemed to wonder at first but later on smiled at him.  
  
“Of course. I promise I won’t tell anyone.” She replied. “I’m maybe young but you can trust me.”  
  
“Thanks Ji Hye.” He told her happily.  
  
I almost cried of happiness after clearing things with Ji Hye. Yes, she’s young but I had this need to make her feel comfortable about the relationship I have with Baekhyun.  
  
“Now, I also want to thank you for being my fan. So, what if I give you a copy of all of my albums…”  
  
“With your autographs!” She said quickly, her mood obviously lifted.  
  
He chuckled. “Of course with my autographs.”  
  
She was already grinning from ear to ear.  
  
“Is there something else that you want?”  
  
“Uhm…” She hesitated. “Actually….” She glanced at me as if wanting me to egg her on.  
  
“You can tell him.” I told her.  
  
“I have always wanted to go to your concerts.”  
  
“Okay, then I’ll make sure you’ll be able to go to all of them. I’ll take care of your tickets.” He stated happily.  
  
“VIPS?!” She shrieked.  
  
Baekhyun looked surprised.  
  
“Oh is that too much?”  
  
He laughed, tilting his head sideways. “Of course not. It’s just that I don’t get to talk to my younger fans like this a lot. So, I’m very happy with your reactions.”  
  
“Oh…” She muttered, looking relieved.  
  
“Just make sure you’re going to ask permission from your mom first. Then I’ll give you a free V.I.P ticket to all of my concerts. Do we have a deal?”  
  
“Deal.” She beamed.  
  
Baekhyun and I both chuckled at her reaction.  
  
“By the way, I think you should talk to my mom Eonnie.” She told me, her face letting me know she’s a bit concerned too. “I heard her walking back and forth inside their room while talking to someone on the phone. I’m not really sure but it sounded like she’s talking to Aunt Yuri.”  
  
 _Oh my gosh._ _Not my mom, please. Let Ji Hye be wrong about this._  
  
My hands became really clammy upon hearing the information. Thoughts of what could possibly happen flooded my mind instantly. There were too many scenarios in my head,  I didn’t even know which one to entertain first.  
  
“And Eonnie…” Ji Hye uttered, sounding more worried now.  
  
I turned to her and just waited for what she’s about to say because I couldn’t really stop fidgeting.

“My mom can be really scary when she’s mad. You should be careful.” She added.

_That surely didn’t help._  
  
I gulped and I knew Baekhyun did the same thing right before we met each other’s gaze.  
  
The additional information about my aunt only made me more nervous. Oh, gosh! I already felt like fainting now. My mom, Aunt Sunny…I didn’t really know how to deal with this anymore.  
  
“Gosh, I’m going crazy.” I hissed totally unaware that I started to walk back and forth like a fool if it weren’t for Baekhyun who took my hand and made me stop on my feet.  
  
He didn’t say anything but just stared at me, slightly squeezing my hand in the process. That simple gesture was undeniably comforting. It was as if he was letting me know that he would be by my side the whole time.

“Oppa…” Ji Hye’s hesitant voice made us look away from each other to focus on her. “Eonnie…good luck.” She said with an equally hesitant smile on her face before leaving us.  
  
  


***  
  
We got back inside the room to change. I used the Bathroom while Baekhyun changed in my room. I changed into a casual outfit wearing blue jeans and a slightly fitting plain black tee.  Maybe it was because of my panicked state that I was able to finish ahead of him, giving me the shock of my life when I saw him half naked with pants on. His bare back was on full display as well as giving me full access to his broad shoulders.  
  
My poor body seemed to have frozen at the sight of a half-naked man in my own room. I gulped, maybe two times, while I watched him pick his shirt to put it on. And for some unknown force, he stopped what he was doing, probably feeling a pair of eyes gawking at him, which of course happened to be mine. I was a hundred percent sure that he was going to turn around so I jumped off my feet to get inside the bathroom once more, unintentionally slamming the door a bit.

  
_Great._ _That wasn’t so discreet anymore. Thank you, door_  
  
I stood in front of the half body mirror right above the sink, staring at my blushing cheeks. My pajamas were still in my hands, so I put them down on the sink first before I fanned my fingers on my face, desperate enough to get rid of the very visible pink tinge.  
  
 _“Ugh, Park Hae Won will you get your act together?”_ I scolded myself. _“You’ve just seen a half-naked man in your room, it shouldn’t be a big deal, right?”_ I continued, busy toing and froing. _“Unless he’s a celebrity and wanted by most of the female population of the country, which is entirely the case here.”_

I did the same thing for the next five minutes and I wasn’t fully aware that I was there for too long already if not for the knocks on the door.  
  
“Baby?”  
  
“Y-yeah?” I stuttered as I made my way to open the door but halted as soon as I noticed him leaning against the wall next to the door, his arms crossed right above his chest.  
  
“Are you okay?” He asked the instant he saw me.  
  
I nodded right before we got distracted by the unstoppable and consecutive message tones from his phone, which was on my bed at the moment. I glanced at him but he remained unmoving from where he was standing.  
  
“Aren’t you going to check those?” I asked.

“I’ll deal with them later.” He replied as he moved closer to me. “Let me concentrate on you first.” He added as he lifted a hand to boop my nose before sliding a hand to hold mine.  
  
“Now, let’s go talk to your Aunt.”  
  
***

We were on the living room, Baekhyun and I were throwing glances at each other, trying to avoid Aunt Sunny’s gaze, who was sitting on the couch opposite to ours. She looked so serious which made me think of what Ji Hye said about Auntie being scary when she’s mad.

“Auntie, I…” I uttered when I finally gathered enough courage to open my mouth. “I’m-”

“I heard you talking to my daughter a while ago.” Auntie intercepted, her eyes fixed on Baekhyun.

I immediately turned to him and found him taken aback, totally unprepared for Auntie’s statement. I saw him about to speak but Auntie signaled him to stop.  
  
“So, you met each other at the old hiking place?”  
  
He nodded to answer her question.    
  
“How long has it been?” She continued to ask, this time her eyes were on me.  
  
I met Auntie’s interrogating gaze and it made it so hard for me to find my voice to respond.  
  
“How long have you been keeping this from us?” She asked once more, this time in a more demanding way.

“A couple of months.” I hesitated trying to fight the anxiousness I was feeling at the very moment.

Auntie didn’t speak for the next few seconds, she just stared unbelievably at me instead.

“I can’t believe this!” She exclaimed, moving her head sideways. “I can’t believe you got yourself in this situation Hae Won.” She ranted. “When you found out that he’s a celebrity, you should’ve kept your distance already. I’m afraid you might be out of your mind.”  
  
None of us spoke. Baekhyun and I just stared at each other. I mean, I know I should come up with something to reason out but I didn’t really know what to say because rationally speaking, Auntie was right.  
  
“I mean...don't get me wrong Baekhyun. You're handsome, you're talented, and you’re probably every woman’s dream guy in this country but...she's...” She trailed off to point at me. “You know it's going to be complicated. I'm worried she'll have to take a lot of criticisms because of being your girlfriend.”

“Auntie…” I muttered causing her to tear her attention from Baekhyun to me. “I’m sorry I kept this from you but I thought about this so many times already-”  
  
“So, you’re telling me that it’s okay? That you’re willing to go through everything?” She took a deep breath and almost glared at me. “My god Hae Won, I thought you’ve always wanted a low key life. What happened? This is totally the opposite if you’re aiming to have a normal life.” She stood as she brought her hands to her waist.  
  
Tears started to pool in my eyes. The lump in my throat was also making it hard for me to control my emotions.  
  
“And you?” She asked Baekhyun with a controlled voice. “Did you ever think about what might happen to her if the public finds out about your relationship? What are you going to do when people judge and criticize her?”  
  
I felt Baekhyun stood right next to me before responding to Auntie’s questions.  
  
“First, I would like to apologize for causing this inconvenience Mrs. Lee.” He stated politely. “You’re right, she might get hurt because of what people would say about our relationship because of my status and it tortures me that I couldn’t do anything about it.” He said with a sense of guilt evident in his voice. “And I can’t blame you for thinking that I am selfish for wanting her. For giving in to what I feel and acting on it instead of turning away to leave her at peace.” He paused and when I looked up to him, I found him already staring at me. “And maybe you’re right, maybe I’m really selfish but I’m sorry I couldn’t stand walking away. I just can’t let her go because what I feel for her is way too strong that I probably forgot to think rationally.”  
  
Aunt Sunny’s expression changed. The stern look on her face slowly disappeared and was replaced by something else I couldn’t really describe. She opened her mouth probably to say something but ended up closing it right away.  
  
I didn’t know what to do, I still couldn’t make any coherent thoughts. I wanted to cry. I didn’t even know what I was feeling exactly but then as if it was the most reasonable thing for me to do, I stood next to him as we both faced Auntie.

“I know asking you to trust me is too much to ask but I guarantee you that I wouldn’t do anything to intentionally hurt her. I love her so much that just the mere thought of losing her is driving me crazy.” Baekhyun added as he took my hand.  
  
He had a determined but soft look on his face right now. I knew fully well that he was nervous about this confrontation but seeing him strong like this somehow gave me encouragement.

I watched how Aunt Sunny’s eyes darted to our entwined hands.

“I’m not leaving him, Auntie.” I told her, meaning every word that came out of my mouth.  
  
It might have sounded absurd to her that it made her sigh. She made a few steps away from us before turning to face us once more.  
  
“You two understand why I’m doing this right?” She asked calmly this time. “Of course I want you to be happy Hae Won, you know that.” She paused to close her eyes for a brief second. “And you also know how much Ji Hye likes him and in fact, I do too but this is just so... this is so unexpected.”  
  
I knew exactly how Auntie felt. There’s nothing about this that was to be taken lightly. Every single bit of information about my involvement with Baekhyun was way too much to handle. And I felt guilty for putting her in a situation like this.  
  
“I called your mom…” She informed all of a sudden, making my heartbeat double in speed.

I couldn’t help but rattle but then I felt Baekhyun squeezing my hand and it kind of distracted me.

“Does she know?”  
  
She took a deep breath.  
  
 _Auntie please. No. Please tell me she’s not aware of any of this._  
  
“I thought of telling her about this but then I realized that it would only make matters worse. If there’s someone rightful to tell her, it would be you.”  
  
I sighed. I was relieved but I wasn’t able to stop my tears anymore. I started to cry. Aunt Sunny stepped closer to me and I took the chance to hug her. And at that very moment, I felt her concern for me. She was just being protective and I totally understand why she’s acting this way. She’s like a mother to me and I cannot blame her for attempting to make me think rationally.

“Just please take good care of her…” She stated while hugging me and I knew that he was talking to Baekhyun who was standing right behind me at the moment.

“I will.” He replied with a gentle voice and I couldn’t help but close my eyes.  
  
“Thank you Auntie.” I told her when we were facing each other again.

“You’re like a daughter to me Hae Won and I just had to try to convince you.” She let out of a small smile. “But seeing how you, the two of you are so determined about this makes it so hard.” Her eyes darted to Baekhyun.  
  
“When I saw you in my kitchen…” She said when we broke the hug. “You didn’t know how freaked out I was. And yes, I knew that there must be something going on between the two of you but somehow I kind of hoped that you were just friends and that Ji Hye was wrong. But then, I saw how you looked at my niece and the way you always stand or sit very close to her. You even slept on the floor.” She said in a matter of fact tone that made Baekhyun smiled coyly.  
  
“I couldn’t sleep well. It was a mistake letting you sleep at Hae Won’s room. I told myself that I shouldn’t have left you two alone together.”  
  
Baekhyun’s ears, for some unknown reasons slowly turned red.  
  
“Uh, don’t worry Mrs. Lee. I really slept on the floor.” He told her. “I swear.”

My eyes uncontrollably went bigger while I look at him.  
  
“What?” He mouthed silently looking so innocent.  
  
I was not sure if Auntie saw that because she looked really confused when I turned to her once more.

  
  
***

  
We were back in my room, lying on the bed about a two feet away from each other. We were both facing the ceiling and the silence between us lasted for a few minutes before Baekhyun spoke.  
  
“What if…” He uttered and I couldn’t help but look at him. “What if I wasn’t a celebrity? What if I’m just an ordinary man with an ordinary job?” He asked while his eyes were still fixed on the ceiling. “What if I met you like the way normal couple meet each other for the first time?” He paused to take a deep breath before he finally turned his body to face me, lifting a hand to his head to serve as pillow while the other rested freely on the space between us. “What if we could do everything we want without people trying to talk about it the very next day? Or go on a date freely and not be paranoid of the possibility of some leaked photos on the internet?” His eyes left my gaze just so he could stare at my lips.

  
“What if I could kiss you out in public without others gawking at us because we’re both ordinary people who are just so in love with each other?” He continued with a subtle smile, his eyes moving to meet mine once more. “It would’ve been better. Easier. That way you wouldn’t have to go through all of these.” He looked away for a brief second and I was sure he was feeling guilty again.  
  
I could sense everything, his pain and his guilt. The way he tend to look away so he could hide it from me. I was fully aware of how difficult this was for him too. And right now, as I stared at him and wait for him to look at me again, I couldn’t help but feel so sad. My heart felt like sinking, my throat started to hurt while I tried to stop myself from shedding tears again. And right before I could give in to their heavy weight, I moved my body to face him too.  
  
“You wanna know why I came to Korea?” I stated trying to keep my voice steady.

I waited for him to turn to me. And when he did, he didn’t say anything. He just stared at me but I knew he was ready to listen.  
  
“I had a great life in Australia. I had a great job, my family’s there, my friends, I lived in a beautiful city with so many beautiful places. My life was fine but then one day I saw photos of some of the most beautiful places here in Korea and for some reasons, my heart ached. Memories of the mountains, the breeze, the sunset, the streets and just the whole ambiance of being in Korea filled my thoughts.” I smiled as I recalled my childhood.  
  
He was listening intently and I watched how his eyes seemed to blink in slow motion.  
  
“You see, I have always dreamed of going back to Korea. I’m not quite sure but there seems to be this void inside me that could only be filled once I go back. And I was right.” The corner of my lips turned up. “I came here hoping I’d find something I really want to do...” My heart started to beat faster.  “However, it wasn’t something I wanted that I found. It was someone…someone who was wearing a black bucket hat who I initially thought was jumping off the cliff. Thank God I was wrong.”  
  
I saw him smile.  
  
“It was you. I found you. ” I muttered before I closed my eyes to give in to the heavy weight of my unshed tears. "Going back to Korea led me to you."  
  
I had my eyes closed when I suddenly felt his hand on my wrist, pulling me closer to him. I didn’t know how he did it so fast that when I opened my eyes, I was welcomed by his undeniably handsome face.  
  
His eyes were searching mine for a few seconds before his beautiful lips parted to say something.

“Please stop making me fall in love with you more.” He said his voice filled with affection. “Because if you don’t, I might just kidnap you and take you somewhere no one would ever recognize us.” He added smiling, definitely teasing me.  
  
I let out of a soft laugh as I lightly hit him in the chest. “Crazy.” I muttered.  
He laughed too, pulling me closer for a hug.  
  
It always felt so good to be inside his arms. And being right next to him now, feeling his warmth, listening to his steady breathing and with his scent all around me made me think that this was the best decision I had ever made,

 

_the bravest one too.  
  
  
 _  
***  
  
I was with Aunt Sunny in the kitchen. We were preparing lunch since she refused to let Baekhyun leave with an empty stomach. He was in my room probably answering calls from people from his agency.  
  
When the food was ready, Aunt Sunny told me to call Baekhyun so we could eat. I was right outside the door when I heard him talking to someone on the phone. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop or something but the moment I slightly pushed the door opened, I noticed that he was pissed. I stopped on my feet and all I could do was listen. He sounded like he was arguing with the person he was talking to. It was his back that’s facing me but I could still sense how stressed he was. He kept raking his hair with his free hand.  
  
“What the hell is Ara doing here?!” He asked vehemently.  
  
 _Ara?  
  
I froze.  
  
Ara…  
  
Kim Ara?_  
  
~♥~   
  
  
  
  
  
  
__________________________  
  
  
AN: Here you go guys! I wanna know what you guys think about this chapter. Feed backs are very welcome. ^^  
I'll also want to share to you some of the Korean Ballads I listen to when I write. I think some of them really fits this story. I'll probably do it next time. :)  
  
Again, I apologize for the typos. I hope they're not distracting you that much. It's already passed midnight here so I'm a bit sleepy. :) I know I have not updated for a long time so I want to submit this as soon as I finished it.   
  
Thank you for the support, _as always._ ♥


	21. Twenty One

**Twenty One**   
  
  


~♥~   
  


I was making my way back to the kitchen, my mind filled with a particular name, _Kim Ara_.  
  
I felt that familiar tug in my heart again. It was crazy how the mere thought of her could make me feel this way. I didn’t know exactly nor did I understand why I was so affected. Maybe because she’s Baekhyun’s Ex-girlfriend and that he never once mentioned her to me. The truth was, I wasn’t even sure if she was really an ex-girlfriend because I only heard about her once. I didn’t ask Ji Hye about her and haven’t dared searching about her on the internet. But now, hearing her name straight from Baekhyun, somehow made it seem like she was indeed involved with him before.  
  
When I was about a few steps away from the kitchen, I tried my best to shake these thoughts away because obviously, I was already overthinking. And it would not do any good to me. Baekhyun’s here and he did nothing more but be honest about what he felt about me. It’s not fair for me to entertain some crazy thoughts and I definitely shouldn’t jump into conclusions because they’re not healthy. I should trust Baekhyun on this one. _Right, I should._ So, I filled my lungs with air before I showed up in front of Aunt Sunny.  
  
“Where’s Baekhyun?” She asked immediately.  
  
“Uh, he’s still on the phone Auntie.” I answered, trying to smile genuinely at her. “He’ll be here soon.”  
  
  
***  
  
  
I tried but couldn’t help but be a bit anxious while I sat right next to him during lunch time. There was no trace of anger on his face now. He was even enjoying his food and happily answered Aunt Sunny’s questions about his songs from time to time. I also tried my hardest to concentrate on my food because all I could think was his conversation on the phone a while ago.  
  
 _Would he tell me about it? I kept asking myself. But then, do I really want to know?_  
  
I looked at Baekhyun again and wondered how it appeared to be easy for him to hide everything and pretend like he wasn’t bothered by any of it. Though, I totally get why he's doing it. Aunt Sunny was with us and he was being polite.  
  
***  
  
Right after lunch, he told me that he had to go back to Seoul because something came up. _Of course, something came up._ My bitchy subconscious remarked but I shoved her away.  
  
We both went back to my room to get his phone and his hat. I sat on my bed as I watched him wore his jacket and I felt that sinking feeling again. It was like watching your favorite day end, afterglow spread across the sky, the air turning icy cold which is an indication that the inevitable night has finally come. And you're there watching everything beautiful about that day leave.  
  
One thing I knew for sure now is the fact that I dislike seeing him leaving. I mean, it wasn’t like we’re not going to see each other again but it’s the thought of not knowing when. The unpredictability.  
  
I sighed. I really have to manage this separation anxiety I get whenever we part.  
  
“Hey…” He said, getting my attention. “Are you okay?” His voice gentle and worried at the same time.  
  
I suddenly became aware that I might have appeared really downcast before him.  
  
“Yeah.” I answered but it must be too late for that lie now.  
  
He went and stood in front of me. He took my hand to make me stand so we’re now facing each other. There was a small, comforting smile on his face.   
  
“I’ll come visit you soon.” He told me, his voice was filled with affection. “I promise.”  
  
My lips formed into a smile too, right before he pulled me for a reassuring hug. His warmth spreading all over me as he wound his arms around my back.   
  
“I know I always make you wait.” He trailed off to take a deep breath. “I could only hope that you won’t get tired of waiting for me.” There was evident sadness in his tone this time.  
  
 _Did I just make him feel that way?_  
  
I felt a bit guilty as I hugged him back as tight as I could. I thought about how he just bravely faced Ji Hye and Aunt Sunny and told them that he loves me and that he wanted to be with me. The best thing I could do now was to not let my apprehensions come between us.  
  
We stood there, hugging each other for a couple of minutes more before we got out of the room so he could say goodbye to Aunt Sunny.  
  
***  
  
  
We waited until there was not a lot of people on the streets anymore. It was only until thirty minutes after when we finally managed to get Baekhyun out of the house to get to his car. He wore his bucket hat to make sure that even if someone saw him, they wouldn’t be able to recognize him easily. Aunt Sunny and I were at the flower shop, watching him as he made his way to his car right across the street. The truth was, my heart was beating like crazy from the very moment he stepped out of the shop. Fortunately, the few people who were on the street didn’t seem to mind.  
  
I heard Aunt Sunny sigh, probably out of relief and I did the same thing. I guess, I wouldn’t get used to any of these. _Ever._  
  
“You two have to be really careful.” Auntie said before leaving me to get inside the house.   
  
She was right.

_We were already being careful but they still caught us._  
  
I stood on the same spot waiting for Baekhyun to finally leave and wondered why he hadn’t left yet. _Could there be a problem?_ It got me worried and I was about to step out on the street when I felt my phone ringing inside my pants’ pocket.  
  
He was calling me.  
  
My forehead creased a bit.  
  
 **“** Baek-” I wanted to ask him if everything was okay but he didn’t give me the chance to do so because he hushed me to listen to him.  
  
“I staring at you right now.”  He said, his voice gentle. “You look absolutely beautiful standing next to the flowers.”  
  
I bit my lower lip as I felt myself slowly blushing. _Gosh, this man really._  
  
“And if I wasn’t an idiot, I should’ve at least bought some for you.”  
  
I smiled at him, well at his car’s window, since I couldn’t even see him inside. I could somehow sense that he wasn’t kidding with his last statement and really felt remorseful. I didn’t want him to feel bad about it, so I turned around to the flowers, stepped towards my favorite, long stemmed baby pink carnations and picked one.  
  
“Well then, let’s pretend that this one is from you.” I told him as I brought the flower to my nose to inhale its fragrance.  
  
It smelled so good, just the way remembered it. The corner of my lips automatically forming into a smile.  
  
I heard him laugh and I could perfectly imagined how he looked at the very moment. If I could be very honest right now, I would ask him to roll his window down so I could see his face. I would love to stare at him too from where I was standing.  
  
“You should know, you deserve all the flowers in that shop.” He stated in a matter of fact tone. "And I would've bought everything for you."   
  
I couldn’t help but laugh at his statement and just the way he said it.  
  
“Excuse me Mister Byun Baekhyun, are you flirting with me right now?” I asked him, making an effort to make my voice low and seductive.  
  
Don’t ask me why I did that.  
 _Well, I guess this is me being brave knowing that he wouldn’t be able to get out of the car._  
  
“Oh god." His response was quik. "How dare you talk to me like this NOW.” He ranted immediately. “Stop, or else I’d get out of this freaking car and kiss you like you’ve never been kissed before. RIGHT WHERE YOU’RE STANDING.” He threatened, sounding like he meant every word.  
  
To my surprise, _I laughed_. I even did it in a way he'd be bothered even more.  
  
I heard him take a deep breath from the other line.  
  
“Is this your way of making me stay, Baby?” His voice, _oh god, his voice went low and raspy._ “Because if it is, then I wouldn’t think twice getting the hell out of here.”  
  
 _Oh no! What have I started?_

My throat suddenly went dry, I even swallowed hard. But then, I knew that he wouldn’t dare get out of his car now. The number of people on the streets had increased and it would be so hard for him not be recognized the moment he’d step out.

_Yes. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t._ I kept convincing myself.  
  
And for some weird reasons, I felt the need to win this. _I started this and I should finish this, right?_  
  
“Maybe?” I replied, seductively.  
  
That was crazy. I knew that the moment I’d let out of that word, something crazy would happen. He didn’t reply but got me all nervous when I saw the door of his car slowly opening.   
  
 _OH MY GOD. HE WASN’T KIDDING._  
  
I rattled, my grip on my phone tightened, my eyes grew wide.  
  
"Baek what are you doing?" I asked in a panicky tone.   
  
"What do you think?" He replied, cockily.   
   
“Ohmygod Baekhyunstop! Iwasjustjoking.” I told him breathlessly hoping he'd change he'd mind.   
  
“No, you don’t get to joke around me like that sweetheart.” He said emphasizing the endearment at the end of his statement.   
  
I swear, he sounded so serious.  
  
My heart, my poor heart, was beating wildly behind my chest. So, when I saw him, one foot out on the ground and was about to reveal his entire physique, I turned around and ran towards the house.  
  
“I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. Just go. J-just go now. Bye.” My voice sounded so shaky when I said it.   
  
I ended the call without giving him the chance to respond anymore. I didn’t wanna hear it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it anyway. I continued to walk as fast as I could, forcing myself not to glance back. My face and ears were heating when I reached the main door of the house.  
  
Aunt Sunny immediately saw me right after I got in and welcomed me with a confused expression.  
  
“What happened to you?” She asked. “Why is your face so red?”  
  
 _Oh right. My face might have looked like a tomato by now._    
  
“Did your boyfriend leave already?”  
  
I wasn’t sure why exactly but when she said “boyfriend”, I blushed even more. I was scared I’d start crying at any moment. I felt so embarrassed and I did this to myself. First the kiss yesterday and now this. Ugh, I had to really accept the fact that I'd never get to humor Baekhyun this way. That man's just so good at making things go his way.   
  
“Y-yeah.” I stuttered, blinking a few times. “He already left, Auntie.”  
  
 _Yes. I hope he already left._  
  
***  
  
I threw my body on my bed the instant I got to my room. I closed my eyes, covered my face with my hands as I silently scold myself for the insane act I tried to pull a while ago.  
  
“I’m pretty sure he’s laughing at me right now.” I told myself grumbling as I shake my legs like a child having tantrums.   
  
 _My phone beeped._  
  
My body stiffened. My eyes grew big as I slowly and hesitantly removed my hands from my face to glance at my phone, which was right beside me on the bed.  
  
 **New message: Byun**  
  
 _Should I read it now?_ No. I’m quite certain his message would make me feel more embarrassed. _Well, that’s given._  
  
 _My phone beeped once more._  
  
I guess the real question was, would I be able to stop myself from reading it?  
  
 _And once more._  
  
I waited for two minutes. Two minutes that felt like a year honestly.  
  
 _I couldn’t._ Of course. I wouldn’t be able to resist anything related to Baekhyun. That’s a fact. So, I anxiously extended a hand to my phone, unlocked it and started to read his message.  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _Park Hae Won, did you just walk out on me?_  
01:27PM

I could hear his voice in my thoughts.   
  
 **Byun:**  
 _How dare you run away after doing that to me?_  
01:27PM  
  
“Yeah, how dare you Park Hae Won. How dare you even pull a prank you couldn’t even handle properly.” I scolded myself out loud before sighing in frustration.  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _Well that’s okay Baby. As long as you promise me that you’ll do it exclusively for me. Promise me you wouldn’t let any man hear you talk that way or I swear I’d… I’d whatever. Just don’t. Okay?_  
01:28PM

My lips started to form into a smile because for some unexpected reasons, his last remark didn’t make me feel more embarrassed or uncomfortable. His messages, in fact, made me feel better. His words were somehow a confirmation that it was okay to act crazy in front of him. I mean, it should be that way when you’re in a relationship right? But what could I possibly do when I was so aware that he’s someone adored by many.  
  
 **Me:**  
 _Okay Baek. Just forget it ever happened. Please._  
01:30PM  
  
I was biting my lip when I tapped the arrow up to send my reply. I brought a thumb to my mouth and started nibbling it as I waited for his response.  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _No. I won’t forget it. Ever. You bad girl._  
01:32PM  
  
Heat started to spread all over my face again as I read his reply. It even sent shivers down my spine.  
  
 **Me:**  
 _Baekhyun!_  
01:32PM  
  
 **Byun:**  
 _Haha. Don’t make me miss you so much. I’ll call you when I get to Seoul. Bye Baby._  
01:33PM  
  
This was one thing I liked about him. How he could make me feel comfortable and assured right after feeling anxious about something. He’s sweet and affectionate, there’s no doubt about that. No wonder he’s so adored by many women. And I couldn’t help but feel blessed to be the recipient of what it’s like to be loved by him.

Right at that instant, I felt a little bit guilty of overthinking right after the mention of Kim Ara’s name. I was being unfair to him by bottling my inhibitions inside. But then again, I couldn’t just bombard him with questions about her. That would be too insensitive and selfish of me.  
  
***  
  
  
It’s been a couple of days since the last time Baekhyun and I last saw each other. A lot of things happened, I called my parents and as expected, they asked me about my plans of going back to Australia. Well, of course I did my best to digress the topic by stalling and trying to ask them other questions like how my sister was doing. It was hard. It was extremely hard to talk to them freely when you’re guilty of hiding something from them. Especially when I could clearly tell by their faces that they missed me. In the end, I had to tell them I’m sorry for not being able to call them as often as I should.  
  
After talking to them and knowing that everything seemed to be going fine with my family in Australia, I felt at ease. It felt good to talk and tell them things I’ve been doing in Korea. Well, minus the fact that I had to keep my relationship with a celebrity a secret.  
  
  
***  
 Weekend came. It was about a quarter past six in the morning when I woke up. I would normally sleep in until nine on Saturdays but I intended to check my phone earlier today. Baekhyun and I would normally text each other before going to sleep. He would even call just to say goodnight so I got a little paranoid when he didn’t even reply to my last message to him which I sent in the afternoon. I sent him another message at around eight in the evening asking if everything was fine but it was left unanswered too. I even called him at eleven hoping he’d pick up but he didn’t.  
  
 _It made me worry._  
  
So, I was really hoping to get a message from him this morning but to my dismay, I had no unread messages. Frustration took over me but I was also concerned at the same time. I didn’t want to overthink but that was exactly what I did when I put my phone back on the bedside table, my attention darting to the ceiling. I tried to close my eyes once more, forced myself to sleep but it wasn’t that easy when I could feel that familiar sinking feeling in my heart. _Ugh, I hate this feeling._  
  
I kept tossing and turning for the next hour, apparently failing to go back to sleep. In the end, I got off the bed and went straight to the bathroom to take a shower. The warm water felt good as it made contact with my skin. I wasn’t able to sleep well last night trying to figure out the reason why Baekhyun wouldn’t be able to even send me a single message. I knew I shouldn’t really overreact especially when I didn’t even have a single idea of what happened to him. For all I knew, something bad might’ve- _No! Not that. I wouldn’t entertain that thought._

I tried my hardest to free my thoughts of anything Baekhyun related. _I concentrated on the water. I concentrated on the water. The water. Water._  
  
***

  
  
It was almost lunch time. I was at the flower shop and had just finished dealing with a customer when I heard Ji Hye calling me. I immediately turned to look at her, who was rushing towards the entrance of the shop. She looked like she just went home from her morning academy.  
  
“Eonnie.” She was panting when she was finally standing in front of me.  
  
“Ji Hye, what’s wrong?” I asked her, confused.  
  
“Did you know? Did Baekhyun Oppa tell you?” Her questions immediately made my heart beat faster.  
  
“What do you mean?” I couldn’t really answer her question because I didn’t know what she was talking about exactly.  
  
“Kim Ara is back.” She announced, her face somehow turned pale.  
  
I gulped. _Not that name again._  
  
I saw Ji hye took her phone out of her pocket and speedily navigated through it. And I couldn’t help but feel anxious while I wait for her.  
  
“Here.” She said handing me her phone with a video being played at the moment.  
  
I immediately saw _her._ She was at the airport. By the looks of it, she seemed to be someone famous as well. She had two men guarding her from several people who I guessed were fans since they were taking pictures of her left and right. They were calling her name and she smiled at them in return.  
  
She’s beautiful. I could instantly tell. She also looked elegant and sophisticated. She had long light brown hair that fell perfectly over her shoulders. She had her sunglasses on top of her head, making her small, perfect face, camera ready. She didn’t have much make up on, her thin lips were painted with the lightest shade of peach. She has a small nose and perfect pair of brown orbs. She was wearing a loose but fancy, long sleeved white blouse, blue jeans paired with pretty nude stilettoes. She looked undeniably pretty, so pretty I couldn’t stop my insecurities slowly trying to get to me.  
  
“Who is s-she?” I stuttered a bit, my eyes never leaving the video.

“She’s Baekhyun Oppa’s ex-girlfriend.” She hesitated. “She went to Paris about three years ago right after the news of her break up with Baekhyun. The news said that she came back from Paris last week.”  
  
 _Last Week._ That was when I heard Baekhyun talking about Kim Ara being back. Has it been a week? Yes, it had been a week and Baekhyun never once mentioned it to me. I didn’t know what to feel exactly while I continued to watch the video.   
  
“Eonnie.” JI Hye called and instantly got my attention. “Are you okay?”  
  
“Y-yeah.” I forced a smile.  
  
I didn’t want her to think that I was so affected by this. Though, it must be too late to pretend that I wasn’t. “Of course.”  
  
I gave her phone back and couldn’t thank the customer, who just walked in, enough for giving me an excuse to dismiss the conversation with Ji Hye because the truth was I felt like I was going to have a breakdown any moment from now.  
  
***  
  
  
3:45PM  
  
I was alone in my room. Aunt Sunny asked me to take a break from the flower shop which I probably truly need. I kept thinking about the video of Ara, Ji Hye showed me which inevitably led me to think about why I had not received any message from Baekhyun yet.  
  
I went to sit in front of my vanity table. I stared at my face for a brief moment before my eyes darted to my phone. I stared at it while I argue with myself whether to text him or not. Of course, I wanted to but I didn’t want to seem pushy or paranoid.  
  
 _Oh god, this is nuts._  
I sighed in disappointment.  
  
I continued to stare at my phone and was unable to stop myself from unlocking it. However, instead of texting him, I immediately went to an internet search portal. With slightly trembling fingers, I hesitantly typed the name Kim Ara.  
  
I was bombarded by a lot entries about her. There were articles about her arrival in Korea last week but I skipped those. I clicked on the first one which happened to be her profile.  
  
 _Kim Ara  
26  
Actress/Model_  
  
Scrolling down, I saw some of her acting projects. The last one dated more than three years ago. She also had a lot of magazine covers. Then I saw one of Baekhyun’s music video, I clicked on it, watched it and found my heart aching when I saw the two of them on the screen. The video started with the view of the beach.  They were standing a meter away from each other, face to face, their eyes meeting. Her hair was being blown beautifully by the breeze then he started to sing about how every part of her face will forever remain in his memory. It was a ballad and it was obvious that it was about her.  
  
I knew fully well that it was a music video and that maybe they were just acting but I started to feel anxious. I stopped midway, closed the video before I eventually get carried away with my emotions. I didn’t like it. It was beautiful but I didn’t like seeing him with her. They were too beautiful together it hurt.  
  
I went back to the search results on the main page. I found a link to her SNS account. I clicked on it and I didn’t really have to scroll down anymore because the most recent picture she posted already made me hold my breath. It was posted last night.  
  
There were three people in the picture. Ara was standing on the left, next to her was another pretty woman who seemed to be of the same age as her. The person standing on the right was a man. He had a subtle smile on his face. A smile I had almost memorized. A face I had become to know very well.  
  
 _Baekhyun._  
  
The caption said: _Happiest Birthday Our dear Soo Ah.  
  
Soo Ah?_  
 _Like Baekhyun’s cousin, Soo Ah?  
  
Oh my god. I have to stop this now._  
  
I clicked and checked on the comments and found out how many people talked about Ara and Baekhyun being together.

_Oml! Baekhyun and Ara???_  
  
 _Can they please be together again?_  
  
 _Are these really Baekhyun and Ara with Soo Ah?  
  
I cannot thank Soo Ah enough for bringing Baekhyun and Ara again.  
  
I like Ara more than the girl Baekhyun was with last time.  
  
Can Ara and Baekhyun have a project or something? That would be so nice.  
  
Ooooh, I missed Baekhyun and Ara together.  
  
I think Baekhyun never stopped loving Ara. He loved her very much. _  
  
I swallowed. My hands were literally shaking now and I suddenly couldn’t bring myself to read the other comments anymore. I absent mindedly put my phone down on the table. I somehow instantly felt scared of what I’d be able to find if I continue _.  
  
Suddenly, the internet had become a scary place for me. _  
  
I could feel a heavy tug in my heart. It hurt.  I brought my weakened legs to get up only to throw my body on my bed. I blinked my eyes a few times before I noticed that I was already crying. I couldn’t bottle my frustration in anymore. It was even getting harder to breathe. I cannot even bring myself to think about Baekhyun because it just hurts too much. I miss and need him now and it hurts not being able to do anything about it.  
  
I need him to tell me that everything is okay.  
I need him to assure me that I didn’t have to worry about what him and Ara being together.  
I need him to tell me why he was with her last night and didn’t even remember texting me.  
I need him to tell me why he never mentioned her to me.  
I need him now.  
 _I just need him now._  
  
  
***  
  


Evening came, I dragged myself to eat dinner with Aunt Sunny, Uncle Jin Woo and Ji Hye. Of course I had to pretend that everything was okay. I didn’t want to worry them especially Uncle Jin Woo who knew nothing about any of this. All throughout dinner time, I caught Ji Hye glancing at me from time to time. I was pretty sure she already knew about Ara’s SNS post. She would look at me worriedly from time to time and seemed like she wanted to talk to be but was hesitant.  
  
It was so hard when you’re trying to hold everything in but getting the idea that your teenage cousin exactly knew what was happening because she happened to be your celebrity boyfriend’s number one fan.  
  
 _This is so complicated._  
  
I retired to my room right away after helping Aunt Sunny with the dishes. I took a shower, put on my pajamas and got ready to sleep. It was early, it was just around thirty minutes past nine but I wanted to escape this reality so bad, _for now._ I wanted to sleep and forget about all of these.  
  
  
***  
  
  
I heard my phone beeping on the bedside table at I didn’t know what time exactly. I wanted to check it, half of my brain insisting that it’s Baekhyun, the other half wanting to sleep more and not mind the situation.  
  
Then my phone rang. I opened my eyes but ended up just plainly staring at it until it stopped ringing. I didn’t know why but I somehow instantly feel indifferent towards him.  
  
I was mad.

My phone rang once more.  
  
This time, I brought my body to sit before stretching a hand to grab my phone.  
  
 **Byun.**  
  
“Baby.” He said immediately. “Hi.” For some reasons he sounded like he was hesitating.  
  
“Baekhyun.” There wasn’t any emotions in my tone.  
  
“I’m sorry.”  
  
“For?” I knew he could sense the sarcasm in my voice which I didn’t try to hide.  
  
He took a deep breath.  
  
“I left my phone at Soo Ah’s last night. It was her birthday so I came. I had a scheduled recording for today so, I wasn’t able to get my phone back immediately.” He explained.   
  
“M’kay.” I muttered. “Who were you with?” I asked nonchalantly. “I mean last night.”  
  
There was a brief silence.  
  
“I was with Kyungsoo and some of our friends.” He answered immediately.  
  
I closed my eyes at the thought that he refused to mention her.  
  
“Okay Baekhyun.” I said wanting to dismiss the conversation right away and I made sure he’d get the idea.  
  
I was sleepy and annoyed at the same time. One thing for certain, I was not in my sane mind right now. My emotions were clouded. I might just end up accusing him of things I might regret in the morning.  
  
“Are you mad at me?” He asked in a soft voice right away.  
  
“I think we’d better talk tomorrow. I’m a bit tired today.”  
  
He fell silent once more.  
  
I didn’t say anything too.  
  
We both waited.  
  
“O-okay.” He finally agreed. “I’ll call you in the morning.”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“Goodnight Baby.”  
  
I ended the call and my heart started to throb.  
 _Ugh, I hate this._  
  
It turned out, I ended up tossing and turning for about an hour and a half before sleep finally knocked me out.

  
***  
  


Sunday.  
  
I woke up very early the next morning. I saw a nearby church the other day so I decided to go there today. I attended the earliest service which in at six in the morning. I went there alone. I wanted to clear my mind. Which I somehow did.  
  
It was around a quarter past seven in the morning when I walked back to my aunt’s house. Since it was a Sunday, the streets were empty, the stores were still closed too. I looked up to meet the sunshine and it kind of felt nice on my skin. I love mornings like these, it’s so peaceful. I could even hear the rustling of the leaves of the trees as the wind blows. It was cold, actually. And I realized that it was a very wrong thing for me not to bring any padded jackets with me.  I didn’t even bring my phone with me, well for this one, I intentionally did it. I wanted to free my mind from everything for a few hours.  
  
I took my time. I walked slowly trying to remember my surroundings that I have come to be familiar with for the last few months now. I loved this town. I will always love this town. I wish I’d never have to leave.  
  
After about another 20 minutes of walking, I was only a few meters away from the flower shop. I had my head tilted down the whole time, my arms wrapped around me since I was starting to get really cold. My nose had even started to feel stuffy. I was watching my every step, even counting them when, out of nowhere, I found another pair of feet a few steps away from mine. I knew those feet. Those pair of sneakers. I held my breath for a brief moment and my heart started to overreact as it began to beat wildly behind my chest.  
  
“Please tell me you’re not trying to get yourself sick.” He said in a concerned voice.  
  
I almost cried. I didn’t know why but I could feel tears forming in my eyes the moment I heard him. I missed him so much and I never thought I’d see him this soon. I mean I didn’t even know exactly if I was mad at him or at myself for creating speculations in my mind. I didn’t look at him just yet, I continued to look at the ground. I saw how his feet moved closer to me and I was pretty sure he was waiting for me to meet his eyes. Then I felt him draping a padded jacket on my shoulders and that was the only time I had the courage to look at him.  
  
He was wearing his black bucket hat and white hoodie. He looked tired and seemed to lack some sleep.  
  
“Baek.” I muttered. “What are you doing here?”  
  
“To see you.” He sounded sad, he surely did.  
  
I didn’t know what to say because the tension between us was strong. He was looking intently at me but I avoided his eyes. Why? I didn’t know exactly. What I do know was the fact that my heart was aching at the sight of him.  
  
He reached for my hand and I closed my eyes at the contact. His hand was warm and mine must be very cold. When he let it go, he brought his palms together, blew on it and rubbed them against each other after, before he brought them to my cheeks. I gazed at him and he did the same thing.  
  
He was very sweet.  Having his warm palms pressed against my cold cheeks was comforting. His warmth was everything I needed now. I wanted to hug him so much. I missed him so bad but I also couldn’t overlook the pain I was feeling right now.  
  
I looked away and I heard him sigh. He took his hands off my face and moved beside me, held my hand and led the way. I walked with him for about three steps before I became so aware that we were holding each other’s hands while walking on the street.  
  
I instantly removed my hand from his and it got him surprised.  
  
“There’s no one here.” He reasoned out in a tiresome voice as he stared at me.  
  
“It doesn’t matter.” I snapped as I glared at him since I couldn’t really stop myself anymore.  
  
I even walked ahead of him.  
  
“Baby.” He called.  
  
I didn’t look back. I was suddenly so pre occupied with all the information I got about Ara, the video, her post, the comments. _God, I felt exploding right here, right now._ _But I couldn’t_. I couldn’t make a scene because he’s Byun Baekhyun and we couldn’t fight out in the open like other normal couples do.  
  
I felt a hand grabbed my wrist.  
  
“Baby please.” He pleaded ass he blocked my way. “I came here so we could talk. Please don’t do this to me.”  
  
Using all the courage I could muster, I looked at him. My eyes were trying their best to hold the weight of my tears.  
  
***  
  
  
We were inside the car. He drove all the way to the entrance of the hiking place and we got here without talking to each other. And it’s been probably a three good minutes when we arrived but none of us got out of the car. I could feel his eyes on me and I knew he was waiting for me to look at him too and I wanted to stab myself for being this hard on him right now but…  
  
 _I don’t know! I couldn’t understand myself too_.  
  
“I’m sorry.” He apologized.  
  
I stared at him and met his eyes for as long as I could before I gave in to my tears. The moment I blinked, my traitor tears unstoppably rolled down my cheeks. And before I could even start sobbing, I opened the door and went outside. I felt like I needed air so the first thing I did was to fill my lungs with air.  
  
The cold wind welcomed me as soon as I got out, caressing my cheeks.  
  
“Hae Won.” He called as I saw him got out of the car too but stopped about three meters away from me.  
  
He looked hesitant.  
  
“I knew…” I paused because I initially wanted to tell him what I knew already but changed my mind when I saw how afflicted he looked. “Why didn’t you tell me about her, Baek?” I asked, unable to hide the pain in my voice.  
  
He wasn’t surprised. He must have known about what I mean all along. He must have known why I was acting this way.  
  
“Why didn’t you tell me about Kim Ara?” I asked once more as I harshly wiped my tears away using the back of my hand. “Why do I have to know about your relationship with her from random people? Why do I have to know how she looks like from Ji Hye? Why do I have to know that you were together the other night from the internet?” I asked him breathlessly and consecutively.  
  
His shoulders slumped and then brought a hand to his head to rake his hair with his fingers.  
  
“Baby-” He sounded like he was about to pacify me and I didn’t need that right now.  
  
“WHY BAEKHYUN!?” I was so angry.  
  
He tilted his head down for a brief moment before looking back at me.

“She doesn’t matter to me anymore.” He stated. “And I never once mentioned her to you because I didn’t think that she’d be an issue. She was a part of my past. I left everything about her or my previous relationship with her there.”  
  
He paused as he walked towards me.  
  
“I’m sorry I’d didn’t tell you about her coming back sooner. I was just too pre occupied with all the conflict and the mess at the company, with Manager Kang, Publisher Kim…” His eyes were boring into mine as he continued to explain. “And about the party…I couldn’t say no to Soo Ah. Ara is very close to my cousin so she was there too. I didn’t…no, I couldn’t tell you about it earlier because I told myself that I’d have to tell you about it personally when I see you again. I didn’t want to just text you or call you about it, scared that you might misunderstand or something because…because the truth is I don’t really care about her or even why she’s back.”  
  
He stopped to wet his lips and take a deep breath.  
  
“I know I was an asshole for letting you feel this way. And you finding out everything through the internet and what it must have made you feel just makes me want to punch myself. I'm sorry." He paused. "I understand why you’re mad at me right now but I swear, you have nothing to worry. You’re the only one I care about.”  
  
If there was one thing I could truly feel about everything he said, it was his sincerity. Every word that came out of his mouth sounded like he really meant them.  
  
“I love you Park Hae Won.” He said before finally cupping my face with his both hands. “And there’s no one in my past who could ever change the way I feel about you.”  
  
I looked at him intently and I could clearly see the pain and affection in his eyes.  
  
“Honestly, I don’t know how we’ll get through all of these but please….” He trailed off to wipe my tears.  
  


_“Please trust me.”_  
  
He uttered as he brushed his thumbs gently against my skin.  
  


"Please, Baby." He said once more and I swear...

 

_I saw tears forming in his eyes._

~♥~   
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Here you go guys. I love you all. ♥


	22. Twenty Two

Twenty Two  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
  
 _…I saw tears forming in his eyes._  
  


_Guilt._  
It was guilt that took over me the moment I saw the pain in his eyes. How could I ever have forgotten that this was his battle too? How could I have only focused on myself? To my own pain, to my insecurities. But then, as I think about it now…I kept asking myself, _would things get better or worse after this? Would I be able to handle more issues like this in the future?_  
  
When I was at church this morning, I thought about my life in Australia. How long would I be able to delay my return? My parents were waiting for me, my whole life there was waiting for me. It almost seemed like I had everything put on hold just to come here. Looking back, I was so sure about everything, every decision that led me here. About him, about us. _I was so sure. I swear, I was so sure._  
  
I didn’t know what’s gotten to me but I suddenly felt unsure.  
  
And now, as I was staring at him, I could help but continue to cry. I felt so bad that he had to ask me to trust him because I failed to do it in the first place. I doubted him by choosing to listen to my apprehensions.  
  
 _So, maybe I don’t really deserve him._ Maybe he deserved someone strong enough to handle the pressure. Maybe he deserved someone who could truly understand his job.  
  
 _Maybe, it wasn’t me._  
  
I closed my eyes as I lifted my hands so I could remove his from cupping my face. When I looked at him, I saw how confusion took over his face. His eyes, full of questions. His lips, slightly parting but no words came out of his mouth. He was just staring back at me, probably waiting for me to rationalize and justify my actions.  
  
I was still holding his hands, took them between us as I struggled to find the right words to say.  
  
“You…” I muttered but paused as I sobbed. “I don’t think...” I stopped once more hoping that I could at least let the words out. “I don’t think I deserve you…”  
  
I bit my lower lip as I tilted my head down to gaze at our hands before I started to let go of him. I saw how his hands limply fell to his sides.  
  
“W-what are you t-talking about?” He asked stuttering, his voice a bit shaky.  
  
I brought my hands to my face to wipe my tears before I gathered every ounce of courage I have to face him once more. It was excruciating. Seeing how he gazed at me unbelievably like I just said the most ridiculous thing ever. Hurt was evident in his expressions and it was obvious that he was tensed because kept wetting his lips and even biting them.  
  
“I don’t…I don’t think I’m strong enough Baekhyun. I really thought I was.” I moved my head sideways.  “I thought I was brave, it turns out I’m not.”  
  
“I…” He took a deep breath as he turned the other way, lifting a hand to run his fingers through his hair. “I don’t understand Hae Won.” He said, meeting my eyes once more.  
  
I went silent for a few moments as I let out of a few sobs, while convince myself to verbalize what I had to say. I opened my mouth but eventually closed it once more in my inability to come up with the right words.  
  
“Baby.” He muttered as he slightly bent down, brought his hands on my cheeks to wipe my tears. “Maybe you’re just confused right now.” He let out of a hesitant smile. “Why don’t we go hike for a bit to clear your mind, hmm? Maybe you just need some time to think. Let’s go.” He talked really fast in a slightly panicky voice.

Without any warning, he grabbed my hand and led the way. I was so unprepared he was able to carry my whole weight with him. I stared at his back while we made a few steps away from the car and the pain I felt in my heart seemed to grow over my chest. I couldn’t stand this anymore, letting him do this would only make things more painful.

“Baek.” I called, expecting him to stop walking but he didn’t.  “Baekhyun.” I said once more, my voice almost broken but he still didn’t budge.  
  
I knew he heard me and I was certain he knew where this was going to lead. And it pains me even more to prolong this.  
  
“Let’s just…” I made my voice louder than the usual and with one last breath, I closed my eyes and mouthed the words I’ve been meaning to say. “Let’s just end this while we still can.”  
  
He stopped on his feet right away and as if in slow motion, I watched him turn to me, looking undeniably taken aback with what I just said. He was holding my hand so tight that I struggled a bit to break free from him.  
  
“What do you mean end this while we still can?” He said in a low voice, his face slightly turning red. “I can’t.” He moved his head sideways. “No.” He added defiantly.  
  
“Baek-”  
  
“No.” His eyes were piercing through mine.  
  
Unable to come up with a reply, I just closed my eyes, trying my best not to start crying again.  
  
“Don’t you trust me?” He asked all of a sudden.  
  
I met his eyes for a second before I had the courage to answer.  
  
“I do…” I replied in a weak voice. “I trust you-”  
  
“Then maybe we can still work this out. I just need you to trust me. You know I love you and you love me too, right?” I could sense desperation in his voice this time while his eyes were seemingly pleading.  
  
I bit my lower lip.  
 _I love him. God, I love this man so bad but …_  
  
“Right?” He sounded pleading more than just asking.  
  
He waited in my silence. He waited but I never had the courage to answer. If I tell him that I love him, it would make things way harder, if I tell him that I don’t…he’d probably wouldn’t believe me.  
  
“My god Hae Won.” He sighed gloomily.  
  
My heart broke as I watched him closed his eyes, took a deep breath and brought his hands to his waist. I watched his every move, the twitching of his lips as he attempted to say something but didn’t. His hair, as it gently sway everytime the wind blows. His tensed shoulders as they slumped. Then he brought a hand to his face, his entire palm covering his both eyes for a brief second.  
  
 _God, he’s crying.  
I saw a teardrop rolled down his cheek.  
I wanted to break down._  
  
I filled my lungs with air. I cannot bear looking at him in this state and the fact that I was the one to blame, made me feel worse. I was starting to cry again as my eyes watch him did the same thing. I heard him sniffed before wiping his tears, his fingers meeting in the corners of his eyes. When he finally removed his hand off his face, he turned to stare at me.  
  
“Please don’t do this to me.” He pleaded, his voice just above a whisper.

He brought his hand to may face to caress my cheek but I looked away, leaving his delicate fingers tracing my jaw instead.  
  
I wanted to give in to him so much. I wanted to just forget about my decision to free us both from this complicated situation. I wanted to just hug him and tell him I’m sorry for acting like crazy since we met this morning. _I wanted to._  
  
But then again, I knew that things would just get harder. More painful than it already was. This relationship would keep hurting me…us.  
  
So, after a few moments of silence, I forced myself to move my head sideways.  
  
“I’m sorry, Baekhyun.” I bit my lip. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Seeing how heartbreak took over his face, my tears fell onto the ground right after I tilted my head down. I immediately took his jacket off of my shoulders and handed it to him before I hastily took the way up to the mountain, _never looking back._

  
  
_***_

 

I had been walking for twenty straight minutes, my tears keeping me company the whole time.  I kept recalling the look on his face before I left him. It was excruciating to see him crying because of me. But I had to do it right? I had to do it to save us both from each other. I didn’t want to stay with him when I knew for a fact that I wasn’t strong enough to overcome the things that might come between us.  
  
I barely managed to convince myself that I’d be fine after reading the comments about him and Ara. I didn’t like the fact that I was so affected by other people’s words. I didn’t like what happened to me. I was so insecure, I was so intimated. I felt so small being someone who couldn’t even compete with Ara. And I also hate the fact that I had to compare myself to her. _I was not like this, I don’t do this. And I don’t know what’s happening to me._

Then a strong wind blew without warning. I felt cold. So cold I had to wrap my arms around myself. I was only wearing my long sleeved, beige knitted sweater, jeans and sneakers. I immediately stopped on my feet, looked up and saw how the foliage of the towering trees moved along with the air. I suddenly felt weird, I felt that sinking feeling in my heart again but this time it was worse. I blinked my eyes a few times as I ignored the feeling and stepped forward.  
  
Bu then, I barely walked a few steps away when I stopped once more. I felt the need to stop because it almost seemed like every step I made away from the entrance of the hiking place was torture. _No._ I shook my head as I convinced myself to continue walking but my feet stopped moving again.  
  
 _Suddenly, my tears stopped flowing._  
  
 _A void._ I was sure there was a void right behind my chest and it’s slowly sucking every strength I have left. I closed my eyes and all I could see was him. Memories of him smiling and laughing flooded my thoughts. I even remembered the first time his delicate fingers caressed my cheeks. How he would pull me closer into a gentle hug. _Oh God._  
  
I opened my eyes and looked behind me and found no one. I wasn’t expecting him to be there but the trails leading back to the entrance of the hiking place seemed to magnetize me, ss if it’s telling me to go back.  
  
He’s not here and the thought of his absence was slowly trying to kill me inside. My hands fell to my sides and I froze as the realization hit me hard. My heart was sinking. My brain was cramming.  
  
 _Did I really do the right thing? And if it’s the right thing, then why does it hurt so much. Why does it feel this way?_ _No. I certainly did not make the right thing. No._  
  
 _How could I be so selfish? I couldn’t believe I actually did that to him. What was I thinking?  
I only thought about myself. I only thought about what I felt and left him hanging. Oh God, how could I be so stupid._  
  
I wanted to hit myself. I hate myself. All he did was ask me to trust him and I made it seem that I couldn’t afford to give it to him. He kept apologizing when it wasn’t just entirely his fault. I was the one who chose to rely on speculations. I was the one who chose to listen to what other people say. I let it all get to me. _Oh god, oh god._  
  
 _I can’t lose him. I can’t lose him. I can’t lose him._  
  
I bit my lip so hard, I was scared they might bleed any time now if I didn’t stop doing it.  
  
 _I love him. How could I do this to him?_  
  
I wanted to punch myself for realizing it now.  
  
I wanted to break down and cry but I chose not to. Not now. I might not be that brave but I had to try. This was not what I promised him. I promised him that I wouldn’t let his hand go. _No. No. No_.

So, after battling my rationality, I settled with the one thing I couldn’t seem to live without. _Baekhyun._  
  
I started to move my legs as I ran back to the entrance of the hiking place. I wanted to cry once more. My heart was full of guilt and regret but I did my best to stop myself from shedding any more tears for now.  
  
My feet hurt, my legs hurt, my head hurt, my heart hurt as I continued to make my way down. I was rattling inside and was trying my best not to trip and die while trying to make up for the dumbest thing I’ve ever done in my life. Half of my brain was trying to tell me that he wouldn’t be there anymore because I just did my best to push him away but the other half refused to give up. If he wasn’t there, then I would have to live with this regret forever.  
  
 _I hate myself. That was one thing I was sure of._  
  
I slowed down when I was about a few meters away from the entrance of the hiking place. My heart was pounding so loud, it was deafening. My hands were slightly shaking, my lips trembling but it was not because of the cold.  I was scared, I was scared to face the possibility that he might not be there anymore.  
  
I took one last breath trying to muster all the courage I have left to step out.

And then…  
  
I froze and started to cry. There was no use stopping my tears. The lump in my throat was so painful. I was crying so hard once more, I just had to cover my mouth using the back of my hand.  
  
 _He was still here._  
He was still here and he was looking right back at me.  
He was leaning against his car, his hands shoved inside his pocket as if he had been waiting.  
He didn’t look angry, he even looked relieved the moment he laid his eyes on me as he straightened his posture.  
  
We continued to gaze at each other as we stood a few meters away.  
  
My knees were starting to feel weak and I was pretty sure I’d collapse if I remained standing on my spot. I wanted to say his name, call him and apologize for being so selfish but I couldn’t. I was too busy crying. I couldn’t think coherently and I certainly couldn’t control my emotions right now.

Then, I saw how he removed his hands from his pockets as he made an attempt to step towards me.  
  
 _NO._ My mind rattled. I couldn’t make him do this. I couldn’t let him be the one to make the first move again. This was all because of me.  I had to do it. I had to be the one to reconcile. I owe it to him. I left him and broke his heart. I definitely need to be the one to do this.  
  
So, without wasting any time, I wiped my tear stained cheeks before I forced my weakened legs to walk and eventually run towards him. I fixed my eyes on him while I made hasty steps to approach him and when I was just a few feet away, I saw how he slightly spread his arms, as if he was ready to welcome me.  
  
 _I swear my heart was about to melt._  
  
There was a loud thud the moment I sent my body crashing against his. The impact was so strong but his broad chest was able to hold our weight. I wound my arms tightly around him as an undeniable relief took all over me.  
  
“Oh god, you’re still here.” I muttered in a muffled voice. “You’re here.”  
  
His familiar warmth slowly enveloped my entire being as it did not only warm my body but also my heart. His scent filled my senses and I realized how not ready I was to lose him.  
  
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I was selfish. I’m Sorry.” I apologized over and over again trying my best to steady my voice because my tears had made their presence known once more.  
  
He lifted a hand to caress the back of my head and to be honest, instead of comforting me, it might have just urged me to cry even more.  
  
“No Baby, it’s okay. It’s okay now.” He said as he hushed me to stop crying. “I’m here. It’s okay now.” He added in the most reassuring way possible.  
  
 _God. I don’t deserve this man._  
  
“I’m sorry I hurt you…” I trailed off to pull away from him so I could look at his face.  “I was just-”  
  
My explanation was cut when he hushed me to stop once more. He cupped my face with his both hands before tucking my hair behind my ears. He also used his thumbs to wipe my tears.  
  
“You came back.” His voice was gentle and filled with affection as he smiled subtly. “And it’s all that matters.” He added as he pulled me closer to him, leaned to kiss my forehead twice before finally wrapping his arms around me.  
  
 _This feeling._ This feeling I get when he seemed to hold me like he’s never letting me go, how could I ever throw this away?  
  
I closed my eyes as I concentrated on nothing else but his presence.

  
  
***

  
  
We were both standing with our backs leaning against the compartment of his car. We were facing the trails the lead up to our special place. It was tempting but due to the cold, we both decided to stay where we were and just hike next time.  
  
I tilted my head to look at him and I was welcomed by his perfect side profile. His face was very calm now while he play with my left hand which he had been doing for the last couple of minutes. Then I thought to myself, what if I didn’t come back? What if I chose to live conveniently and apart from him? Then maybe I wouldn’t be able to gaze at him like this. I wouldn’t be able to experience how good it was everytime he held my hand.  
  
Then he turned to face me all of a sudden, catching me probably with a dreamy look on my face. _I blushed, of course._ He brought a hand to brush the hair, covering my face due to the wind, away from my face. And I couldn’t help but notice soft the look on his eyes was and how he lovingly gazed at me while he did it.  
  
“Why didn’t you leave?” I heard myself hesitantly ask him.  
  
His eyes met mine as I anticipated his response which came through a slight smirk.  
  
“Why did you come back?” He asked in return, leaving my question unanswered.  
  
“Because…” I momentarily looked away feeling a bit anxious. “I realized how stupid I was to walk away in the first place.” I told him, this time gazing intently at him.  
  
“And because…” I trailed off a bit as I saw him smile. “Because I love you.”  
  
He seemed pleased as his smile reached his eyes. I love it when his beautiful eye smiles makes an appearance.  
  
“Well…” He paused to clear his throat. “I realized how stupid it would be for me to give you up that easily…so I didn’t leave.”  
  
I felt him brushing his thumb playfully against my hand.  
  
“And I love you.” He uttered and he almost had me crying.  
  
He was so sweet and gentle, how could I ever leave him? How could I ever sacrifice moments like these with him just because of what other people might have to say? And as I was about to get sentimental once more, I heard him clear his throat as if wanting to get my attention.  
  
“Now, can we please stop talking and kiss already?” He suggested, the corner of his lips turning up, forming into a beautiful crooked smile.  
  
I didn’t respond. His smile somewhat left me mesmerized. He seemed to wait for my response but when he didn’t get any, he initiated to face me. He was now standing right in front of me while I still had my back leaning on the compartment of his car. He slowly took my hands and brought them over his shoulders while his eyes never left mine. Then his hands found their way to the curve of my waist.  
  
I didn’t understand what it was but it seemed like everything slowed down. He momentarily looked down and I witnessed how the corners of his lips turn upward making way for a subtle smile. I swear it was like magic, how his eyes were filled with affection as he met mine once more.  
  
No words. There were no words between us and honestly I was so scared to even utter a word and ruin everything because if I did, I’d never forgive myself. And right when I was busy convincing myself to concentrate on the feeling, he stepped closer, immediately causing me to hold my breath. I literally did it as my eyes remained glued on his face. He was amused, I swear he smirked at my reaction right before he lifted a hand to my neck, his thumb delicately tracing my jaw line.  
  
 _And my god, I was about to go crazy._ My heart beat was beginning to go wild behind my chest and I was pretty sure he could hear it. I suddenly blushed at the thought, making me look away to avoid his heavy stare. I thought it was a good idea but I had to think twice when I suddenly felt his lips on my jaw which automatically made me freeze. _I blinked twice, no maybe thrice_.  
  
He kissed me once more, right on the same spot before his lips went to my chin and eventually his small kisses led to the corner of my lips. I took a deep breath and before I could even think of something else, he spoke.  
  
“Hey.” He said in a slightly raspy voice.  
  
Blushing, I miraculously was able to find the strength to face him.  
  
“I’m about to go crazy…” he trailed off as he brought another hand to tuck my hair behind my ear. “And it’s all your fault.” He added as he shut his eyes closed for a brief moment.  
  
I blushed harder when I saw his jaw clenched, his Adam’s apple moving as he swallowed. My throat suddenly felt dry, I knew I needed to say something so I slightly parted my lips while I try to think of a decent reply. But then my attempt to speak flew out of the window when he, without any warning, leaned closer. His warm lips claiming mine in an instant.

I was surprised, of course, but he made sure I wouldn’t be able to entertain that because his lips started to brush against mine aggressively and I couldn’t help but get lost amidst all the sensations his kiss was giving me. I automatically shut my eyes as my entire being gave in to his demanding mouth, parting my lips. It instantly sent shivers down my spine. Then my lips started to catch up with his pacing. I wasn’t thinking, I couldn’t. My heart was hammering, it’s making me deaf. Then I started to get weak in the knees so, I clung to him like I was holding on for dear life. I tightened my arms around his neck, my fingertips unintentionally gripping his hair. He groaned and almost gave me a heart attack when he suddenly lifted me off my feet and made me sit on the compartment of his car.  
  
He stared at me for a few seconds and by using his hands, he titled my head up so he could have a better access to my mouth once more. And without any words, began to kiss me again. His kisses were as insistent and aggressive as the first one and I just couldn’t help but go with it. It was totally making me crazy. Incoherent thoughts filled my mind.  
  
My face was so hot and I didn’t feel cold all of a sudden. He wasn’t the only one warm now. And I almost lost it when he placed one hand at the back of my neck, the other went down to the small of my back, pulling me closer to him. I circled my hands around his neck once more as I focused on how good the kiss was. My head was definitely spinning now, making me feel as though I was intoxicated.  
  
His satin soft lips began so slow down a bit, turning the kiss into a gentle and affectionate one before he finally detached his experienced mouth from mine. With our foreheads touching, and our lips just an inch away from each other, we both panted a bit in unison. His hands finding their way back to my face as my own were comfortably draped around his shoulders.

“I’d go mad with the thought of not being able to kiss you like this.” He told me and ended his statement with a smile, his warm breath fanning my face.  
  
A coy smile crossed my lips upon hearing his remarks.  
 _Oh god, I love him. I even love every word that comes out of his mouth._  
  
“I was scared.” He muttered once more, as he pulled away from me a bit so he could stare at me.  
  
 The playful look on his face was nowhere to be found. He sounded serious and there was a sentimental look on his face.  
  
“I really thought I lost you earlier.”  
  
His voice gave me that familiar tug in my heart, I couldn’t help feel a sense of guilt. How could I ever initiated a heartbreak that we both didn’t want in the first place?  
  
Unable to come up with an appropriate reply, I pulled him closer to me. I didn’t know what to say. I guess I was not as good as him when it comes to words. I hugged him tighter, hoping that he’d somehow be able to read my gestures. His face was buried against my neck, while his nose traced my skin.  
  
Nothing has been quite easy since we started this relationship aside from being with him in moments like these. When we’re apart, I tend to overthink about our situation but when we’re together, nothing else seemed to matter anymore.  
  
 _Thirty minutes._ A whole thirty minutes was what it took me to realize that I could never stand not being with him, that I want and need him in my life. I need him like how I need the sunset to remind me that everything will be okay at the end of the day.  
  
I tilted my head up to look at the sky as I began to tear up again.  
  
“I am not going anywhere.” I muttered in a slightly cracked voice.  
  
He must have sensed that I was crying again so he straightened his posture as he stood in front of me. His eyes meeting mine straightaway.  
  
I brought my hands to cup his face, my thumbs gently brushing his soft skin.  
  
“I’m not going anywhere without you.” I told him as I made the effort to sound reassuring.  
  
There was a soft expression on his face, his beautiful brown orbs exploring every part of my face.    
  
 _And right at that very moment,  
  
while tears roll down my cheeks…_

_I leaned my face towards his, closed my eyes and planted a kiss on his lips._  
  
  
~♥~ 

 

 

AN: Hey you guys, here's Baekhyun and Haewon TT.  I really have to get this scene off my chest because it's so heavy. Anyway, I hope you like this. Let me know about what you think of this fic so far. ♥


	23. Twenty Three

  
~♥~

The mix of gold, orange and yellow leaves of the trees around us continued to dance with the gentle wind. The mountain was perfectly dressed in Autumn colors and I just loved it.

Baekhyun and I were on the same spot right behind his car. It had been about fifteen minutes since we made up and he refused to let me go,  _literally._  Like how he was back hugging me right now with his arms wound around my waist. I could only closed my eyes as if mentally saving everything in my memory. And as soon as I was able to concentrate on his warmth, I slowly started to get drowned with the thought of how good it felt to be inside his arms.

Then, I somehow just realized that he came to see me really early which only meant he left Seoul way earlier. I opened my mouth in the attempt to ask him but ended up closing it when I felt his arms tightened around my waist.

"You don't know how much I've missed you." He said right next to my ear, making the corners of my lips turn upward to make way for a smile.

"Is that why you're here this early?"

"That." He replied quickly. "And the realization that I couldn't stand the thought of you being mad at me." He slowly loosened his arms around me only to spin me around so I could face him. "The way you sounded really hurt and mad at me last night...it was killing me, you know." He added while his eyes did nothing else but bore into mine.

I could sense guilt in his voice and I couldn't help but also feel sorry for the way I acted, knowing that it wasn't just entirely his fault. I was to blame too.

_Kim Ara._  
I didn't want to ruin the moment but I knew I had to ask him. I had so many questions about her and I wanted to hear the answers straight from him.

"Baek?" I hesitated.

"Hmm?"

"I want to know..." I gulped to win over my nervousness. "I want to know about Kim Ara."

He looked slightly taken a back and hesitant at first but then he started to speak.

"Ara and I met because of Soo Ah. I met her at Soo Ah's party years ago. They already knew each other even before her acting and modeling career began. She's actually nice and I kind of liked her in the long run."

I didn't really know how his last sentence made me feel but I was also aware that I couldn't take back my words now.

"I saw the music video."

He probably knew which one I was referring to.

"That." He took a deep breath. "My publicist, Miss Kim, saw a photo of us hanging out and suggested to have her on the music video of my new song and surprisingly, everyone else seemed to agree with it. A lot of people like her and they thought that I'd be good publicity for us both. They even told us that if we get positive reactions through the music video, we wouldn't have any problem with our relationship in public."

I bit my lip, fully aware of the fact that the public approved his relationship with her. I mean, they were even talking about them up until now.

"How long were you together?"

"Two years."

_Two years is a long time._

"So, why did you break up?"

"She..." There was a momentary pause as he cleared his throat and tilt his head away. "She fell out of love."

_My heart sank._

"Well, she denied it but I was pretty sure she did."

I saw him blink a few times and I could tell how much it must have hurt him.

"If she didn't, then she wouldn't have entertained Seo Tae Joon."

I wanted to cry the moment I heard of another man's name. I couldn't believe something like this happened to him.

"Tae Joon is a model. He was pretty famous at that time too. He and Ara used to do several magazine covers together and maybe...maybe I got too busy with my own career too. I got so engrossed with my own stuff and I don't know, maybe I kind of taken her for granted, I really don't know."

My heart throbbed and I wasn't kind of sure if it was because of the thought that someone hurt him before or because I was the one who brought this all up. I was about to apologize but he smiled at me reassuringly as if he just read my mind.

"I asked her if she wanted to just end things between us so she could finally be with the one she really wanted." He took a deep breath. "But then she told me that I was that someone. I was the one she wanted and that I was wrong thinking that she didn't love me anymore. She said she'd stay and prove that to me. So, we both tried to work it out. We held on to the relationship as long as we could but..." He swallowed. "But things were just undeniably different between us after. I didn't know if it was just her but I also kind of felt indifferent towards her later on. She wasn't the same person and maybe I wasn't the same too and then everything just went out of hand after. The conflict between us was getting bigger as we both got so stressed with our individual careers. Things between us got so unhealthy we just kept on hurting each other and we eventually had to end things to save us both."

"I'm sorry that I had to ask about this..."

"No baby, it's okay." He said as he lifted a hand on my cheek. "It happened a long time ago. And I guess it's better that you hear all of these straight from me. I don't want you to ever feel like she still meant something to me. Yes, we might see each other from time to time now that's she's here in Korea but that's it. I swear, you're the only woman I want now..." he paused. "And I don't care how complicated it gets, I'd still want you."

I was looking intently at him while my heart danced with his words. And I couldn't help but wonder how someone could fall out of love with this man.  _That's just absurd._  I couldn't even make myself think about choosing someone over him. I wouldn't want anybody else apart from him. And I guess I've never loved someone as much as I love him now. No one could compare to how he makes me feel every time.

So, without any word coming from me, I tiptoed before I wrapped my arms around his neck for a hug. It only took him a few seconds before he hugged me back.

"Thank you." I muttered. "Thank you for coming to see me this early. Thank you for making an effort to fix everything." I trailed off when I felt his arms tightened around me. "I missed you...so much."

"You have no idea how frequent I think about you when we're not together." He replied in a gentle voice.

My weak heart was about to melt when I suddenly remembered  _something_. I immediately detached from him and looked at his feet which sent him looking baffled.

"Are your legs still okay?" I asked him.

"Huh?" He asked with furrowed eyebrows. "They're fine, why?"

"Because you've been running non-stop on my mind." I tried my hardest not to laugh and get through this pick up line.

His eyes grew wide, his mouth fell opened and looked at me silently for a few seconds. His unexpected reaction totally made me feel uncomfortable _._ My face started to heat up.

_Oh my god, what a good way to embarrass myself in front of my celebrity boyfriend._

"I-I shouldn't have really s-said that..." I struggled to say while I looked straight into his eyes. "Right?" I added and by this time, I was certain that my face had turned into a strawberry.

He didn't answer, the subtle disbelief still written all over his face.

"Gosh, this is so embarrassing..." I mouthed as I moved a few steps away from him.

Then I heard him laughing and I definitely knew why. He was laughing at me and not at what I just said. He must be most probably thinking how lame and corny I was and I couldn't really blame him. Out of nothing else but embarrassment, I just stood a few steps away from him and waited for him to stop laughing.

"You're so cute." He told me as he stepped closer to me, immediately placing a hand at the small of my back to pull me next to him.

"I wasn't being cute." I was surprised at how hurt I sounded as I tried to avoid him.

"But you are... you and your vintage line." He reasoned out with a beautiful grin on his face.

"I should've kept that old fashioned line to myself..." I said, almost sulking as I attempted to walk out.

I heard him let out of a soft laugh before calling me.

"Hey baby, wait. I told you it's cute."

I wasn't looking at him as I continued to walk away but I could perfectly imagine how his perfect his grin was.

"Really. It's funny too." He went on as he finally grabbed my wrist to pull me closer to him once more. "It's the funniest thing I've heard today." He added, obviously trying to stifle another laugh.

I wanted to punch him for openly making fun of me but he's so handsome I wouldn't want to ruin his face, so I just looked away.

"Hey Baby." He muttered.

I refused to look at him because the truth was, I was already scolding myself for bringing up that stupid line I probably got from my grandmother.

"Baby." He said once more. "Are your legs still fine?" He asked, chuckling.

_Oh my god, this guys really!_ My eyes grew wide as I finally turned to him and I was about to open my mouth to argue when he suddenly lifted me up and carried me in his arms.

"Baekhyun!" I shrieked in surprise, my hands automatically meeting behind his neck for support. "What are you doing?"

"Since you've been running non-stop on my mind too..." He answered casually. "I'm afraid your legs might give up anytime soon." He added, ending his statement with a wink.

I guess it was my eyes' turn to grow wide.

"Promise me you'll take care of your legs..." He continued. "You'll still have a lot of running to do."

"OH MY GOD BAEKHYUN SHUT UP!" I told him as I hit his shoulder right before he started to walk closer to his car.

I watched him while he laughed. His laughter filling my ears, his beautiful crescent eyes and perfect smile in full display, made me totally forget about everything.

_Gosh, I love this man.  
He swept me off my feet both literally and figuratively._

***

10:47AM

We drove back to the town when I found out that he had a schedule in the afternoon. He was about to start his tour next month so he already had scheduled rehearsals now. I couldn't be happier for him and congratulated him and he replied by making me promise that I would go to one of his concerts.

_Of course. I wouldn't miss it for the world._

We were right at the entrance of the town when he mentioned that he was kind of hungry. Honestly, I was a bit hungry too. And Since Uncle Jin Woo was at home, Auntie's house was not an option. Without having any better ideas, I told him to drive to the nearest café. We both agreed for him to just wait in the car while I buy something inside.

For some reasons, the nearest café was  _Take me to the stars._  The same café where Eun Chan and I talked. While I was ordering, I couldn't help but felt a bit anxious because being in this very place reminded me about that day. I recalled everything he said to me. The photos, and the crazy fact tha he knew about my relationship with Baekhyun.

_Baekhyun._

_I haven't told him about any of it yet._  Gosh, how could I ever forget about it? I didn't really know if it was a big deal but I promised him I'd tell him about my conversation with Eun Chan. I certainly have to tell him today.

  
***

I handed him the food and coffee I bought right after I got inside his car. I didn't know I spaced out for a few seconds if he didn't call my name. When I turned to him, he's got a worried look on his face.

"Is something wrong, baby?"

My heart suddenly started to hammer right behind my chest. I didn't imagine it'd be this hard. For some reasons, I felt scared he'd know. What if this would only add to the stress he's trying to deal with right now? Well, I was a hundred percent sure it would but I had to tell him. I had to tell him about Eun Chan.

"Eun Chan." It was all that I could muster.

"What about him?" He asked, plainly.

"He..uh..." I gulped, tilted my head down a bit before looking up at him again. "He knows... about us."

His worried expression immediately transformed to annoyance. His eyebrows furrowed, his lips forming into a thin line.

"What do you mean, he knows about us?" It was obvious that he wasn't expecting this news.

"He knows I have a boyfriend and he knows it you..." I trailed off as I watched him take in everything. im take in everything. heed nd he knows it you.ing up at him again. rows furrowed, his lips forming into a "He's got the photos Baek." I bit my lip. "The ones on the internet."

"What?" He asked unbelievably.

"He's has the copy of the original photos." I said, my voice almost shaking.

I suddenly got so scared upon remembering the kind of information Eun Chan had in his hands. I could only pray that he'd be true to his words and not do anything to harm Baekhyun.

"Why the hell does he have those freaking photos?" He continued to ask and I could tell that his anger was building up.

"He's with a top broadcasting company in Seoul."

"Damn it!" He hissed.

He looked like he was about to break things. I saw how his jaw clenched right when he leaned his head against the headrest of the driver's seat. He lifted a hand to brush his hair up, revealing his creasing forehead. He shut his eyes closed and swallowed a few times. I was pretty sure he was trying to control his anger or maybe his frustration right at the very moment.

"Baek..." I hesitated.

He didn't move nor turned to me. I opened my mouth once more hoping I'd be able to come up with a decent set of words but failed. I ended up fidgeting with my fingers on my lap instead. I knew I was about to cry once more, so I bit my lips tying my best to overcome and forget about the painful lump in my throat.

"Manager Kang..." He stated, snapping me out of my thoughts. "I talked to him recently." He paused to wet his lips. "I asked him why, of all people, would he ask me to break up with you." He smirked. "And you know what? Aside from the fact that the company was pressuring him to talk me out of this, he said also he received a personal call from someone asking him to convince me to break up with you or else that person would expose me."

_I blinked once._  
Twice.  
Thrice.

"No." I uttered in disbelief. "H-he said he'd never do something like that..."

My god. He lied to me. Gosh, I wanted to cry. I wanted to for so many reasons. I couldn't bring myself to believe that Eun Chan, being my friend for how many years would be able to do something like this. I heard him pretty well when he said he wouldn't do such things. But what do I really know? It's been a few years. He had changed. I guess, I didn't really have a slightest idea of what he's like now.

I was angry. I felt betrayed though I shouldn't have really trusted him in the first place.

"Baby."

I felt his hand reached for mine, held and squeezed it. I turned to look at him instantly and noticed how he didn't look mad now, only concerned.

"We're gonna be okay, right?" I asked him, my voice above a whisper.

"Of course." He said with a small smile on his face. "We're going to be alright. We are going to be alright."

_I knew he wasn't just convincing me.  
He was convincing himself too._

***

The next few weeks went by a blur. The internet was crazy. I saw a lot of articles linking Baekhyun and Ara. But then I knew better now and for some reasons I don't get that affected by it anymore. If there was one thing I learned the most from all of these, it would be to trust Baekhyun, to only believe in his words.

From time to time, Ji Hye would ask about him. I knew she's also worried about all these Kim Ara things but I assured her that Baekhyun and I were fine. Aunt Sunny was kind of subtly checking on me as well. I knew they were only looking after me and I couldn't be more thankful to have them by my side.

***

6:37AM

It was a Wednesday morning when I woke up to a few messages from Baekhyun.

**Byun:**  
 _Hey Baby, I just got home from rehearsals._   _I don't feel really good._  
4:23AM

Four in the morning? That's just way too late, I thought to myself.

**Byun:**  
 _I might have come down with a flu._  
5:45AM

My heart started to beat faster upon the thought of him getting sick.

**Byun:**   
_I know this is absurd but can you please come over? I'm at home.  
05:59AM_

**Byun:**   
_Please, Baby.  
06:08AM_

After reading the last message, I brought my thumb to my mouth and started nibbling it. Should I go? Wouldn't it be risky for me to come over? I thought about it for a moment before I dialed his number which only rang for a few times before it got routed to a voicemail.

_Ugh, my god_. If I didn't go, I was a hundred percent sure I'd wouldn't be able to relax with the thought of him being sick and not doing anything. I couldn't stand being here while he's suffering.

_What do I do?_

I bit my lower lip as I brushed my hair away from my face while I contemplated and it sure did take me a few blinks before I made up my mind, got up, went straight to the bathroom.

***

8:37 AM

I was already at the train station waiting for my ride to Seoul. Thankfully, Auntie did not ask any more questions when I told her that I needed to see Baekhyun because he was sick. She just reminded me to be very careful and to make sure that I knew the way. Of course, I assured her that I would be careful and that I knew where his house was exactly.  _I hope._

I arrived at Seoul at around twelve noon but it took about another forty five minutes for the cab to get to where his house was located. And just to be safe, I got off a block away from his house. Well, I knew it was unlikely for the cab driver to recognize his place or something but I had to be very cautious.

  
***

I was finally standing right outside his house. I went to press the buzzer and after a couple of minutes a security opened the small door located on the rightmost part of the huge gate who immediately looked at me from head to toe.

This must be Mr. Yoo, his body guard. He seemed to be in his early thirties. He looked really sturdy and strong as he towered over me. He was wearing a black suit, his hair neatly brushed up.

"Are you Miss Park?" He asked, his deep voice almost startled me.

"Y-yeah."

"Okay Miss Park, Baekhyun told me about your visit." He announced.

I could only nod at him because he looked a bit scary. I guess body guards always had to radiate that aura. Though, Baekhyun told me that Mr. Yoo's a kind and reliable man.

He closed the door behind me and pointed me the way to the entrance of the house.

As I got inside, I noticed how clean the house was. Everything was set in order and I almost forgot how huge and beautiful this was. I had a flashback of everything I witnessed the last time I was here. Manager Kang and Publisher Kim's visit as well as Kyungsoo's. Sure, it made me feel a little bit uncomfortable but I knew I need to shake these thoughts away. I needed to concentrate and find my sick boyfriend.

I went upstairs through the glass railed flight of stairs leading to the familiar hallway on the second floor. After passing through his wall photos, I found myself standing outside of what I believed was supposed to be his room.

_I knocked._

No answer.

I knocked once more but there wasn't any movement inside the room. So, I latched my hand on the knob, turned it and found that it wasn't locked. I instantly noticed that it was a little dark inside. I cautiously stepped inside afraid that he might be resting and I'd end up disturbing him but I wasn't even about three steps away from the door, which I left ajar, when I heard him.

"Please tell me you're Park Hae Won." His voice sounded a bit raspy and definitely sick, he even sounded like he was shivering.

My heart sank at the sound of his voice and did not waste any time. I dropped my bag on the floor and took hasty steps towards his bed. He coughed a few times and it got me so worried.

"Oh my god, Baek are you okay?" I asked, concern taking over me as I sat next to his body.

Since the only source of light was the one coming from the hallway through the door, I couldn't really see his figure that well. So, it got me a little bit startled when he rolled towards me before circling his arms around my waist like a child.

"Thank god, you're here." He almost sounded breathless this time.

I brought my hands to his face and was alarmed at how hot his skin was.

"My god Baek, you're so hot!" I exclaimed.

I heard him let out of soft but weak laugh. "I have always been hot, Baby." I swear I could almost hear the smirk on his face when he said it.

_My gosh,_  how dare him even try to be funny right now. He's burning and I couldn't help but panic.

He coughed once more.

"Seriously Baekhyun. Should I take you to the hospital?" I spoke really fast as I break free from him so I could touch his forehead, neck and arms to check his temperature.

"I can't believe you didn't call anyone." I sounded like I was scolding him but really, how could he just suffer inside his room like this. "Tell me, who should I call?"

I turned around to look for the switch to turn on the lights and when I finally did, I walked towards his bedside table where his phone was. I grabbed it, ready to go through his contacts when I noticed him on the bed.

He was facing me, his eyes boring into mine. He was wearing a plain, white T shirt with the lower part of his body covered by his gray comforter. His black hair was disheveled, his eyes looked tired, his nose was a bit red and... _but... how on earth did he manage to look so handsome as ever?_

_Damn, I must be crazy_. I scolded myself as I tried to shake these inappropriate thoughts away.

"There's no need for that." He replied. "I'll be fine now that you're here." A small, tight lipped smile crossed his face. "Come here." He added as he tapped on the space next to him.

"Baek..." I uttered softly in my weak attempt to protest.

"I'll be fine baby, I promise." He insisted weakly, giving me those puppy eyes before coughing.

"Have you at least taken medicine?" I still couldn't help but worry.

"Yeah. I did about 2 hours ago." His reply was quick.

"Are you sure?" I asked, skeptical.

He nodded.

"The very thing I need right now is a cuddle from you."

_Gosh, I get so weak and defenseless when he's being clingy._

I took a deep breath as I succumbed to his request. I put his phone down on the table, took off my sneakers before climbing on the bed next to him. He made me lie down, his arm serving as my pillow.

"You're here...." He pulled me closer right before he covered our bodies with his comforter. "I've got everything I need now." He said gently as he closed his eyes like he was about to sleep.

I couldn't help but feel so soft. I swear my heart was about to melt any moment from now. I kept looking at his face, trapped in the moment as I realized how blessed I was to be inside his arms.

_I must have really saved a country in my past life._

I titled my head down and bury my face against his chest while I brought my arm around him.

_Were all of these really real? Was I not dreaming_?

  
  
***

4:15 PM.

I didn't know I had fallen asleep. The moment I opened my eyes, the first thing I did was to touch his forehead. He wasn't as hot as he was a while ago but he still got fever. Snuggling up sure did make us feel good, so good I could do this for the rest of my life but I must do something else. So, I thought of cooking something for him since I was certain that he hadn't eaten anything yet.

I slowly removed his arm around me to get off the bed. I did it really slow, afraid that I might wake him up, which I thankfully didn't. I also made sure to cover his body with his comforter so he won't get cold.

Right after making sure that everything seemed fine, I got out of the room and directly made my way down to his kitchen. The first thing I did was to check his fridge. I was relieved to see that everything I would need was there. I contemplated about what I could make for about a few minutes before I decided to make a vegetable soup. I wasn't sure if he was gonna like it though. But then Baekhyun seemed to like everything when it came to food so this might do.

It took me about forty five minutes to finish preparing his food when I sensed someone was in the living room. He must have woken up and went down to look for me. I hurriedly took the apron off and made my way to the living room.

"Baek why did you get up..." I trailed off when it wasn't Baekhyun I found.

_It was her.  
It was Kim Ara._

  
By the way my heart suddenly started to go wild behind my chest, I was sure it was  _her._  
  


***

  
She froze just like I did.

She was standing at the foot of the stairs and it was clear that she was about to go to his room. She was wearing a pretty, long sleeved, above the knee, mustard dress as beautiful as she was, paired with the most beautiful rust colored, high heeled sandals. Her dark brown hair had the right amount of wave making her look like a real life doll.

I suddenly felt so conscious with what I was wearing which was nothing but a plain, maroon, long sleeved top, jeans and sneakers.

  
"Hi." I heard her say with a small smile.

"Hi." I hesitated, my voice giving away how uncomfortable I felt right now.

I watched her turn her back from the stairs to come closer to me and stopped when she was about a foot away before offering her hand.

"I'm Ara." She introduced politely.

_Gosh, her voice was really sweet. She also seemed so demure and very lady-like._

I felt like an idiot as I did nothing but stare at her offered hand, I didn't know what to say. I didn't know if it was right for her to know me or even see me here in the first place.

"You must be Hae Won?" She asked.

She was smiling when I looked up to meet her face once more.

"Y-yeah." I finally said when I was able to find my voice as I took her hand.

_Then there was silence. The most awkward silence. Ever._  
We both avoided each other's eyes for a few seconds before she bravely spoke.

"Well, this is awkward." She said letting out of a soft laugh. "Why don't we go sit and talk a bit?" She suggested.

I just nodded as I silently pleaded my brain to work properly in the next few minutes.

  
***

We both sat in front of each other and the longer I looked at her, the more I got conscious. I had no other words to describe her but "beautiful". Now I knew exactly why people were rooting for her and Baekhyun. They really looked good together.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were here." She said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

_What did she exactly mean by that?_

"He told me he's sick." I heard myself say. "So, I came over."

"Me too." She replied.

_Did she mean she came over because he was sick?_ Well, that was what she obviously said but why would she do it?

"I heard from Publisher Kim that he was sick so I came here as soon as I could to check on him." She added as if she just read my mind.

I just looked at her not knowing how to react to what she just said. I couldn't just tell her that she didn't have the right anymore because that would be so rude. I didn't want to make a scene or something.

"Were you cooking something for him?"

"Yeah. I was."

"He likes Chicken noodle soup." She stated. "That's was what I used to make for him whenever he's sick. His favorite." She paused to show off her beautiful smile. "Well, in case you didn't know about it...yet."

I swallowed and she must have noticed that I wasn't so pleased with the conversation that we were having as of the moment.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to offend you, of course." Her apology sounded so sincere as well.

_I hate it.  
I hate that she seemed so nice. So kind. So perfect._

"It's fine." I replied.

I guess the liar in me won.

_More Silence.  
Awkward silence._

"By the way, did he already mention about our upcoming Magazine Cover together?"

"What?" I blurted out, absent mindedly.

"Oh, so he hasn't mentioned it yet."

"No, he hasn't mentioned anything like that to me." I felt a bit hurt.

"But it's fine, right?"

I blinked twice before I was able to fully process her question.

"I mean, you're fine with us doing a magazine cover together, right?"

I gulped. My face was starting to feel hot. I didn't know if I was embarrassed or angry or hurt or maybe I was altogether. My hands started to feel clammy because my god, I wasn't prepared for any of this. I wanted to just get up and leave her but my morals were telling me I shouldn't. That I should stay and try to keep a straight face when the truth was, everything was about to explode inside me.

Then as if on cue, I heard another voice in the living room.

"Ara."

I could tell by his voice that he wasn't happy with what was before his eyes right now.

_Kim Ara and I._

We both stood and turned to look at him who just showed up out of nowhere in front of us. He walked towards me wearing the same T shirt paired with a navy blue sweatpants and slippers. He immediately reached for my hand when he stopped next to me and I saw how it caught Ara's attention.

"What are you doing here?" He asked her, his voice sounded weak but controlled.

"I-I..." She stuttered, her eyes still on our hands. "I heard that you were sick." She added as she blinked a few times before meeting Baekhyun's gaze.

"What did you tell her?" He asked her once more.

"Well, I was asking her if she already knew about the magazine cover." She explained, nonchalantly. "And apparently she doesn't have any idea about it yet."

"Why would you do that?" His third question came really quick.

She suddenly looked hurt by his interrogation.

"I don't see anything wrong with it Baekhyun, I was just plainly asking." She reasoned out in a nice way.

"I told Manager Kang to give me time to think about it first."

Ara looked a bit surprised with what he just said.

"Well, then I guess you should talk to him again because Publisher Kim made it sure to me that you're already doing it."

He took a deep breath as his other hand to his forehead. This was stressing him out. This was stressing me out too and I just couldn't stand being here any longer. I felt suffocated. I desperately need some air.

"Baek, I'll go check the food in the kitchen. I'll just leave you two so you could talk." I told Baekhyun.

He just stared at me and no words came out of his mouth but I somehow sensed that he was trying to make sure that I was okay.

"It's fine." I said with a smile, making an effort to sound reassuring.

"Are you sure?"

I nodded as I lifted a hand on his face. "Yes."

I knew I didn't have to do that. I could've just excused myself without being affectionate towards him right in front of Ara but I did anyway. Something in me wanted to let her know that Baekhyun wasn't hers anymore.

  
***

  
I wasn't able to breathe properly until I was a few meters away from them. This was so unexpected, I couldn't believe I just met her in person. The truth was, I couldn't even completely bring myself to the kitchen because I stopped right behind the first wall. My knees felt weak, my hands were slightly trembling. And it might have been a bad idea because I could audibly hear their conversation right where I was standing.

"Why are you here?" He asked exasperatedly.

"I already told you Baek, I came here because I heard you were sick."

"Why?"

"What do you mean, why?" She sounded confused. "Of course, I was worried about you. I believe that's pretty obvious."

"Well now that you've seen me, I'm fine."

"No, you don't look fine. You're sick." She insisted.

"Ara please." He said in a controlled voice. "Just go home." There was a pause. "Let's not give people something to speculate about."

"I'm here for you and what people's got to say isn't my priority." She reasoned out.

"Well, it is mine." He answered quickly. "I don't want people to start speculating about you being in my house." Another pause. "Look Ara, you know fully well that I have a girlfriend now."

"I know." Her reply went really soft. "But I want to be the one to take care of you Baekhyun."

_There goes that familiar tug in my heart._

"Ara please. My head is throbbing, I can't do this right now..." He told her gently.

"Let me take care of you like what I used to do." I swear, she sounded a bit desperate. "Let me be the one to cook your favorite food."

"My girlfriend is here. She's going to take care of me."

There was silence.

I didn't hear any word from her anymore and for some reasons, I felt a bit hurt for her. She sounded so concerned and sincere and I couldn't help but conclude that she still had feelings for Baekhyun.

_She still loves him._  The very fact that she was here asking him to be the one to look after him was enough proof. I couldn't hear any words from them so I tried to risk my sanity by peeking.

I saw them both standing face to face with Baekhyun facing away from me. I could clearly see the pain in her eyes. She was about to cry as she gazed at him as the silence between them grew. Then she tilted her head down before moving a step closer to him to hug him.

I swallowed at the sight, even bit my lip to suppress whatever it was I was currently feeling. I watched him just stood there, his hands on his sides with his head up for a few seconds before he took her arms off of him.

"Just go, Ara." He said in a very calm way. "Please."

She didn't resist or protested. She silently stepped away, lifting her hands to her face probably to wipe her tears before she turned around to leave.

The moment I heard the front door closing, I hurriedly walked hastily towards the kitchen. I shouldn't be here. I brought my hands to my face to fix my hair only to find my cheeks wet of tears.

_Had I been crying?_

_***_

  
I was leaning against the counter when I heard his approaching footsteps. My heart was racing because I just couldn't seem to get myself to relax. I did my best to make sure there'd be no more trace of tears on my face before he sees me.

He walked in without saying anything. He stopped a feet away from me, definitely looking tired and apologetic at the same time as he silently gazed at me. I just stayed quiet, one because I didn't know what to say and two, the image of Ara hugging him was obscuring my mind's ability to think.

I looked away when I couldn't take it anymore.

"I..." I trailed off as I felt the lump in my throat. "I made you something to eat..." I added as I momentarily turned to him but made sure not to meet his eyes. "I really don't know..." I paused as I turned my attention to the food in front of me once more. "What you like exactly so..."

I stopped talking when I suddenly felt him behind as he hugged me, his hands meeting right in front of my stomach, his chin resting on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry..." He apologized, his voice filled with sadness.

He must have waited for a response and when I didn't let out of any word, he removed his hands around me and made me face him.

"I didn't know she was coming." He explained. "And about the magazine shoot, it's true I'm still thinking about it and I'm planning to tell you about it soon."

I looked up and blinked my eyes a few times to try and stop myself from crying again and I hate it. I hate myself for wanting to cry once more. I couldn't deal with this right now. I had to do something that would take my mind off this matter.

"You must be hungry." I said forcing a smile. "Why don't you eat first?"

He remained staring at me for a few moments as if trying to read me before he sat on the high stool chair. I kept myself busy as I served him the food that I have prepared. I knew his eyes were on me the whole time and it was so difficult not to even pay him a single glance.

"Please eat." I stated when I had finished everything in front of him.

"How about you?"

"Yeah, I'm going to eat too." I answered as I sat in front of him.

We both ate in silence, well... not totally because he was coughing from time to time. I knew it was uncomfortable but I just need a little time. I didn't want us to talk about it while I was emotionally wrecked, scared that I might say something I would regret later.

***

  
I was washing the dishes and was fully aware of a whole Byun Baekhyun standing right behind me, leaning against the counter. When I was done with all the work I could possibly do in the kitchen, he hesitantly reached for my hand.

"Hey Baby..." He muttered. "My head hurts."

I initially thought that he was just saying it to get me to talk to him but I found his face a bit red when I looked at him. The first thing I did was touch his cheek and instantly realized that he's fever had gone up once more. I totally forgot about how I initially felt about the whole situation.

"Oh god Baekhyun..." I muttered unable to hide concern in my tone as I panicked a bit.

I got him to sit on the chair and when he was already seated, he pulled me closer to him and wound his hands around my waist while he buried his head against my neck. I could feel his warm breath on my skin and I swear I was so worried. I wanted to take him to the hospital but that would be so complicated of course.  _Gosh, this was making me crazy._

"What do I have to do Baek?" I asked him trying to prevent my voice from shaking.

He moved and leaned away from me when he heard my questions. He just gazed at me and I was hoping he'd tell me to call someone like Manager Kang, or Kyungsoo or a family member but he didn't. He said something else that made me hold my breath.

  
"Stay with me tonight."  
  


_His voice was weak..._

_and so was my heart._   
  
  


~♥~   
  
  


AN: Thank you for waiting lovies. ♥ 


	24. Twenty Four

Twenty Four  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  


  
  
_“Stay with me tonight.”_  
  
My poor heart that had always been weak for him couldn’t take the way he’s gazing at me with pleading eyes right now. I was also fully aware of his hands around my waist tightly as if stopping me from making even a single step away from him.  
  
There was absolutely no way I could ever leave him like this, so I only contemplated for a few seconds before nodding. Right after my agreement, I saw how relief took over his face as he closed his eyes, his lips forming a subtle smile before leaning his head against my shoulder once more.  
  
***  
  
We were in the living room. He was lying on the couch, fully covered by a thick comforter that I got from his room just a few minutes ago. His temperature was still a little bit high, so I had a wet towel on my hand to wipe his face, hoping it would somehow help cool his fever down. I noticed that he was sweating even if he was slightly shuddering. I got another wet towel to wipe the other parts of his body starting from his neck. Actually, I was a little bit hesitant to do it at first but then I realized now wasn’t the right time to entertain my feelings.  
  
I sat on the spare space on the couch next to him as I lowered the comforter down to his stomach so I could wipe his arms. I was doing it both gently and carefully so it wouldn’t bother him that much. Then my eyes fell on his chest and noticed that his shirt was slightly damp.  
  
 _Should I take his shirt off?_ My mind momentarily lagged at the thought. But then again, I shoved my reluctance because Baekhyun’s condition was a priority. However, before anything else, I had to go get another shirt for him, so I hastily went to his room for the shirt and went back as soon as I got it.  
  
“Baek, you have to get changed.” I told him so he would be aware of what I was about to do.  
  
I took a deep breath as I gathered all the strength I could muster to pull the upper part of his body. He opened his eyes the moment I had my arms around him and helped me took his shirt off. I was thankful that I was standing and all I could see were his shoulders and arms. I was still distracted though, I took the gray shirt that he was going to change into so he could wear it right away. I sat, facing him to help him pull the shirt down his waist and my traitor eyes lingered at the sight of his abs.  
  
I already felt myself blushing while I moved closer so I could fix his shirt on his back when he suddenly wrapped his arms around me. I wasn’t able to say anything, undeniably surprised by his sudden act.  
                                                                                                                                                                                 
“I’m sorry.” He apologized in a weak voice.  
  
 _My heart sank._ He was sick and all but he was still thinking about what happened and I somehow couldn’t help but feel a bit sorry that we both had to feel this way right now. I didn’t really know what else to say, I knew I wasn’t mad at him anymore or maybe I was never really mad at him in the first place. It was just the situation, which I believe he didn’t have control over either. I couldn’t let him think that I was blaming him when he’s all sick and vulnerable in front of me right now.  
  
“It’s okay Baek.” I replied. “Just promise me you’ll get better soon.”

He responded with a nod as soon as we broke the hug. I helped him lie on the couch once more and just when I was about to stand to fix his comforter, he urged me to lie next to him.  
  
 _Again, how would I be able to resist him?_  
  
We snuggled against each other on the couch and didn’t say anything afterwards. We both stayed in the same position for a while before I closed my eyes and listened to the quiet and eventually nodding off.  
  
***

6:10PM  
  
The first thing I did when I opened my eyes was to check his temperature by touching his forehead. I was somehow relieved with the thought that his temperature seemed to have gone back to normal. When I was about to step away, I felt him grab my hand, making me stop on my feet.  
  
“Don’t go.” He murmured with his eyes still closed.  
  
My lips formed into a small smile at how gentle he spoke, he even looked vulnerable.  
  
“Baek, I’ll go make us dinner. I’ll be right back, I promise.” I replied, assuring him.  
  
“M’kay.” He mumbled as he eventually let go of my hand.  
  
I went straight to the kitchen and started to prepare for dinner. I made another serving of soup for him since he couldn’t really eat just any type of food due to his condition. It took me about thirty minutes to finish cooking. I took the food to the living room, woke him up so he could start eating. At first, he told me that he didn’t really feel like eating but I insisted. We both sat on the couch facing each other as I feed him. Right after eating, I asked him to take the medicine, which he did without hesitation.  
  
It was almost eight when we decided to go back to his room. We just got inside and I was currently helping him sit comfortably on the bed. He closed his eyes as soon as he was able to rest his head against the headboard.  
  
I sat next to him for a while and just stared at him as I wondered if he often had to deal with something like this all by himself. Then I recalled what Ara said to him a while ago about being the one to take care of him again.  
  
“What is it Baby?” He asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.  
  
I was a bit frazzled for a moment, wondering if I was that obvious. But then again, _maybe I was or else he wouldn’t ask._  
  
“I was just wondering…” I trailed off as I thought of another thing so we wouldn’t have to touch on anything related to Ara.  
  
I saw how his tired eyes met mine as he waited for my answer.  
  
“Where’s your guest room?” I blurted, all of a sudden.  
  
His eyes grew wide, staring at me incredulously like I just said the most ridiculous think ever.

“Is this another attempt of you being funny?” He asked in a mild tone.  
  
I blinked my eyes twice and just waited for him to speak one more time because I didn’t have any other excuse as to why my creative mind came up with such question.  
  
“No one’s sleeping in the guest room.” He stated before he coughed.  
  
“B-but I’m a guest here…” I stuttered as I got off the bed.  “I should sleep in the guest room.” I reasoned out.  
  
He cleared his throat before talking.  “No man in his sane mind would let her girlfriend sleep in the guest room when she comes over.”  
  
 _So, I guess we’d end up sharing the same bed again tonight. I should’ve really seen this coming right? Why did I feel even surprised about the thought?_  
  
“C’mon baby, stop making my head hurt even more and just come here.”  
  
I didn’t move and bit my lower lip.  
  
“Wait.” He said looking as if he just remembered something. “Are you scared of me or something?”  
  
“What?” I muttered as he caught me off guard.   
  
“Are you scared that we might do it?” He asked, putting emphasis on his last two words.  
  
I instantly blushed. _Hard._  
  
“What are you talking about Byun Baekhyun?” I asked, letting out of a nervous laugh as I silently prayed that he would just drop the topic immediately.  
  
Well, he didn’t say anything else. He just continued to look at me but there was an absolute doubt written all over his face. So, I made a move to climb on the bed and sat next to him, desperately wanting him to just forget about what I just said. For some reasons, I couldn’t look at him straight in the eye because there was something about the way he looked at me.  
  
“Of course I want to do it.”  
  
I gulped the moment I heard him.  
  
“I’d be a hypocrite if I told you that I hadn’t been thinking about it.” He added and I swear I saw him swallowed right after.  
  
I could feel my heartbeat growing wild behind my chest and I ended up biting my lower lip again as the tension increased between us.  
  
“Ugh, I…I have to get changed.” I told him absent mindedly and I knew fully well how foolish I sounded.  
  
I got off the bed once more and turned around, not really knowing where to go.  
  
“Third Closet on the left.”  
  
I turned around to face him, immediately throwing him a questioning look.  
  
“Open it when you see it.” He instructed casually.  
  
I nodded in response, afraid that any word that would come out of my mouth would only make the situation more awkward.  
  
I went straight to where his closets were located. I could remember how the room looked like. There were several closets but my eyes darted to the particular closet when he shoved me and kissed me the last time. I instantly blushed as the thought as I recalled how that exact kiss felt like. I even stopped on my feet and dedicated a few good seconds thinking about it.  
  
 _I shouldn’t be really thinking about this right after the kind of conversation we just had, right?_  
  
“Gosh, Park Hae Won. Focus.” I scolded myself as I looked for the third closet on the left.  
  
I stood in front of it and hesitated a bit. I didn’t really know what I was expecting exactly but still had my jaw dropped when I saw the contents when I finally opened it. There were about two sets of Pajamas hanged inside, a padded jacket, and two dresses. One was rust and the other one was the lightest shade of blue. The corners of my lips automatically turned upwards.

_Did he get all of these for me? I mean it’s wrong to be assuming but, what else should I be thinking?_  
  
I should definitely consider myself lucky to have him as my boyfriend… no _I’m blessed._ He’s so sweet and considerate and never failed to make my heart flutter every single time.  
  
  
***  
  
When I got back, he was already soundly sleeping. I sat next to him carefully, scared that I might wake him up. I watched him as his eyes were closed and listened to his slightly ragged breathing. I had my back leaned against the headboard while I gently stroke his hair away from his eyes.  
  
I sighed as I silently told myself that I could do this forever. It was just somehow making me a bit sad that he had to be sick first for him to take a rest like this. I knew he’s been rehearsing nonstop for his upcoming tour. And he, being sick just meant that he needed to slow down a bit and take care of his health.  
  
I kept stroking his hair until I grew sleepy before I closed my eyes and finally gave in to sleep without shifting my position.  
  


***  
  
I didn’t know what time was it exactly when I felt him waking me up.  
  
“Baby.” He muttered, I felt his warm hand on my cheek.  
  
I struggled to open my eyes and realized that he had already turned off the lights leaving the lamp the only thing on.  
  
“Baek…are you okay? How do you feel?” I blurted out as I also brought a hand to his forehead.  
  
There was a subtle smile on his lips as he took my hand off his face and held it.  
  
“I’m fine.” He replied.  “I just woke you up so you could lie properly.”  
  
“Oh.” I mumbled, instantly realizing that I did fall asleep sitting. “What time is it?” I asked as I initially thought of grabbing my phone on his bedside table to check the time but he stopped me by draping an arm around my waist.  
  
“Let’s just go to sleep, please.” He pleaded in a sleepy voice.  
  
I automatically turned and gazed at his beautiful face for a few good seconds before I fixed my position to lie properly next to him. We were facing each other, my hands were pinned against his chest while he hand an arm over mine to keep me close. His eyes were already closed and I could see the shadow of his eyelashes courtesy of the dim light coming from the lamp. Then my attention was caught by his moles which I had begun counting unconsciously when I saw his sleepy eyes opened.  
  
He was looking intently at me and was anticipating for his words but he ended up shutting his eyes closed once more.  
  
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to stop myself from kissing you right now?” He told me without opening his eyes.  
  
I gulped, unable to come up with a reply.  
  
“Damn I really hate this flu.” He added, in a mild tone.  
  
I just stared at him. I didn’t dare open my mouth afraid that I might just make the situation uncomfortable. Thankfully, he didn’t make any remarks after that. I took my time watching him and when I was finally satisfied, I inched closer to him as I brought an arm over his waist. He must’ve felt my gesture that he ended up moving closer to me as well, leaving his face snuggling against my neck.  
  
And I kind of just noticed how often he did it. He must have liked it.

  
_And if he must know, I liked it too._  
  
***  
Morning came.  
  
I heard a sound of the shutter and I was pretty sure someone was taking a picture but I didn’t really know if that was a part of my dream or something. I felt my eyebrows furrowed a bit as my mind continued to dwell on the thought.  
  
 _It must be my imagination,_ I concluded as I tried to go back to sleep since the bed and the pillows felt so nice. The scent coming from the fabric was also amazing. So amazing they almost remind me of Baekhyun. His manly scent that I have grown accustomed with. I felt the corner of my lips subtly turning up when I recalled how close we slept right next to each other last night. Cuddling with him was unquestionably one of my favorite things in the world.  
  
 _Wait._ My private bubble exploded right away when I remembered that I was still on the same bed. I struggled to open my eyes and almost held my breath when I saw him sitting, his back leaned against the headboard, his hands meeting at the back of his head while his eyes bored into mine.  
  
“Morning Baby.” He muttered, a beautiful tight lipped smile painting his lips.  
  
I instantly noticed that his hair was a bit wet. _Did he already take a shower?_ My eyes fell on his shirt which was now a plain black one, confirming that he had indeed already taken a bath. He was also wearing a different sweatpants now.  
  
 _How long had he been awake? How long had I been sleeping? How long had he been watching me sleep? D-did he see me smiling while sleeping? Oh my god._  
  
“W-why didn’t you wake me up?” I asked as I tried to distract myself from my own thoughts.  
  
I sat next to him, scrubbing my eyes before brushing my hair away from my face while I wait for his reply but no words came out of his mouth, so I turned to face him again.  
  
I heard another shutter sound right before I was able to clearly realize what he was doing. He had a camera on his hand and I was certain he just took a candid picture of me.  
  
“Baek, what are you doing?” I whined, instantly covering my face with my both hands.  
  
I heard a few consecutive clicks while he laughed at my reaction.  
  
“Oh my god, Baekhyun stop.” I demanded as I tried to take the camera from him but he was fast to lift the thing up.  
  
“Why?” He asked innocently as he moved a bit father from me before he started to check the shots. “You look pretty as ever.” He said with a wink.  
  
 _I blushed._

“Have I ever told you you’re the prettiest like this?” He added, paying me a single glance.  
  
I just bit my lower lip. I swear I still didn’t know how to take his compliments well. _And for Pete’s sake, can he stop smiling?_ I swear he looked so handsome with his slightly damp hair right now, I’m scared I might start crying anytime.  
  
Then, I saw him put the camera on the bedside table before moving closer to me. He held me by the arm, stared at my face until I grew conscious, before making as us both lie on the bed. We ended up facing each other wordlessly for a few seconds before he opened his mouth to speak.  
  
“Thanks for taking care of me.” He said, his voice sounded pretty good now.  
  
“How do you feel now?”  
  
“Never better.” He answered, smiling.  “Thanks to my girlfriend.”  
  
He was gazing lovingly at me as he brought a hand to caress my cheek. The contact immediately urged me to close my eyes. _Gosh, I just love it when he did that._ I was still spoiling myself, savoring the moment when, out of nowhere, I felt his strong arms lifting my entire body and placed me on top of him. He did it so fast and smooth, I didn’t even have the time to shriek. My panicked hands automatically landing on the mattress for support, my long hair falling on one side.  
  
“W-what are you doing?” I stuttered, my eyes growing wide.  
  
“I changed my mind.” He stated, his eyes exploring every part of my face. “You’re the most beautiful like this.”  
  
I was fully aware of his hands meeting at the small of my back before he brought a hand to my neck, his thumb resting on my earlobe. And I knew that he was going to tilt my head down so he could kiss me. My eyes were glued on his slightly parted lips, his icy cool breath fanning my face making me aware that I just woke up and hadn’t even washed my face nor brushed my teeth.  
  
 _Oh my god. Oh my god. He already smelled so good while I just woke up_.  
   
I leaned away from him all of a sudden and with too much force, he wasn’t able to stop me from getting off the bed anymore.  
  
“What…where are you going?” He asked, confusion written all over his face as he sat up on the bed.  
  
“I’m gonna go brush my teeth first.” I couldn’t help but be honest while my mind crammed as I take the way to his bathroom.  
  
His laughed echoed inside the entire room before I heard his hasty footsteps following me which caused me to run and lock the door behind me.  
  
“Baby c’mon, it’s not like we haven’t done it before.” He called behind the door in an obviously amused tone.  
  
“Just give me a minute.” I replied as I tried to look for a spare toothbrush inside the cabinets.  
  
Thankfully, I found one. I went to stand in front of the sink were his toothbrush and toothpaste were. I squeezed just the right amount of toothpaste on _my toothbrush_ before I started brushing.  I didn’t know how many minutes it had been when I heard him again.  
  
“Seriously?” I heard his loud laughter as he knocked on the door. “This is already taking a year Baby.”  
  
 _Oh my god. He’s so impatient._ I whined silently as I finished brushing my teeth. But then, for some reasons, I couldn’t hear any sign of him outside the door anymore. He must’ve gone back to his bed.  
  
I looked at myself on the mirror to fix my hair. I was wearing the pair of satin, maroon pajamas he prepared for me. I actually loved it. The fabric felt so cool and smooth against my skin. The sleeves were too long for my arms which I also kind of liked too.

When I was done, I latched my hand on the knob to finally open the door. And just as I had expected, he wasn’t there anymore. I closed the door behind me to walk back to where his bed was and found him him sitting on the edge of the bed, his head tilted down, and his attention on his phone, which he was holding as of the moment. I felt a little nervous for a second, thinking that something might have happened again, but totally dismissed the idea when I saw him looked up and instantly met my eyes.  
  
He made one single tap on his phone and a familiar melody filled the entire room that caused me to hold my breath.  
  
 _Did he just a play song? What was he doing?_  
  
I saw a beautiful and affectionate smile crossing his lips before he put his phone down on the mattress. Then he slowly stood and made his way to me.  
  
 _Me after you by Paul Kim_

_After I met you_

_I’ve been happy with small changes_

_In the dazzling morning_

_I open my eyes by thinking of you_

  
My heart unstoppably started to beat wildly as I my eyes followed him drawing near to me. He stopped when our feet were only a few inches way from each other.  I looked up to meet his eyes and it almost felt like I was suddenly drawn into a trance. Our own private bubble where only the two us existed. The lyrics and the melody of the song was making me all soft, I’d want nothing else but be inside his arms.

_I love you_

_Just like now when it’s peaceful_

_I want to be with you forever_

_I thought as I was looking at you_

  
I slightly parted my mouth to try and come up with something, but didn’t have the chance to do so when he gently took my hands and brought one on his shoulder, the other one he held by his own while his other hand found its way to my waist. Every move we’re making were like done in slow motion and it’s making my heart really weak.

_I was so happy after meeting you_

_I was able to love you so much_  
  
I was gazing at him, watching every part of his face while he did the same thing. Then the corner of his lips went up as he smiled, the kind that reached his eyes. My favorite Byun Baekhyun smile and my heart almost did a backflip. Then he started to lead us to dance gently to the rhythm of the song, our feet making slow and small steps.

_I want to be with you forever_

_I thought as I was looking at you_

 

I didn’t really know how long it had been because even the background seemed to have faded away. The only things that were occupying my mind were the beautiful melody and lyrics of the song and the constant gaze Baekhyun was giving me.  
  
 _I’ll kiss your eyes as you’ll have a lot in your mind_

_Let’s walk forward together_  
  
I was getting weak, my knees were. This absolutely felt so good, I felt like crying. I had only seen this in the movies and to have this happening to me in real life was so overwhelming.  
  
 _Are you happy after meeting me, too?_

  
He mouthed the lyrics of the song silently. I nodded in response before I tiptoed to wind my hands around his neck, bringing my body closer to his, my head resting right above his shoulder. His hands, on the other hand, found their way to my waist.  
  
 _I found a perfect love_

_That I’ve waiting for a long time_  
  
I felt his hands tightened around my body, planted a kiss on my cheek before burying his face against my hair.   
  
_After I met you._  
  
The song ended but we remained on the same position for a few more seconds. None of us said anything and as the silence built up between us, my heartbeat raced nonstop. I bit my lower lip as I detached from him only to bring my hands to his face and stared at him as if memorizing every detail of his handsome face.  
  
 _God, I love him so much. How had everything turned to this? How come I was the one standing right in front of someone this country adored so much? What did I do to deserve this? How could he love me like I had always dreamed to be loved? Were all of these really real? Please tell me, I was not dreaming._  
  
I couldn’t seem to take it anymore, it almost felt like something inside me was about to explode. I was holding my tears as hard as I could because I didn’t want to cry anymore.  
  
“Tell me you love me.” He said, out of nowhere.  
  
I froze and was unable to say anything for a couple of seconds. I wanted to tell him the words he wanted to hear right away but my response didn’t come in the form of words. I tiptoed and without a warning, pressed my lips against his.  I knew, I didn’t normally do this, in fact I had never been the type to do this but I was so overwhelmed right now. He must’ve been surprised with my gesture, just as I was. Our lips were steadily pressed against each other for a few seconds while I still fight the urge to give in on the heavy weight of my unshed tears.

  
“I love you.” I finally said when I broke the kiss. “So much.” I added trying my best to steady my voice, my hands still cupping his face.  
  
When he lifted a hand to my face, I knew that I had failed and had already started crying.  
  
“Ahh, this is crazy,” I remarked with a nervous laugh, stepping away from him so I could wipe my face with my own hands. “I’ve been crying a lot lately, I don’t really know what’s happening to me.” I told him as I turned facing the other way.  
  
I didn’t hear any word from him but I could feel his eyes on me. And I was proven right when I caught him gazing at me with a somehow unreadable expression on his face.  
  
“Y-you must be hungry. Why don’t we go to the kitchen so I could prepare something for you…” I suggested but he remained still as he stood in front of me.  
  
I saw his jaw clenching and this was somehow making me uncomfortable.  
  
“Let’s go. You need to eat Baekhyun.” I insisted, turning around to leave.  
  
I wasn’t even about three steps away from him when he spoke and grabbed me by the wrist, spun me around that I ended up facing him.  
  
“You.” His grip on my hand tightened, his eyes piercing through my entire being, making me instantly weak in the knees once more.  
  
I swallowed since I couldn’t overlook the undeniable desire in his eyes.  
  
“You’re all I need.” He said with evident conviction in his tone.  
  
He pulled me towards him in one swift move, his hands now holding my head, his lips grazing against mine already. And oh my god, I wasn’t prepared for the sudden intensity of his pace. I was seriously spacing out for a couple of seconds before I gave in to his experienced mouth. I closed my eyes as I succumbed to the overwhelming feeling his kiss was giving me. I started to kiss him back, automatically lifting my hands to hug him.  
  
As the kiss intensified, I couldn’t help but feel kinda intoxicated. I was sure my head was spinning while the butterflies in my stomach seemed to have turned into birds. I honestly didn’t know what was happening to me or to my body right at the very moment. I couldn’t think of anything but him. His mouth, his scent, his arms around me, his hands which I believed had found their way to the curve of my waist. Though they only stayed there for a brief moment because the next thing I knew, his fingers were already grazing my skin inside my top. I was surprised with how warm his hands felt on my waist that I accidentally bit his lower lip. And I was a hundred percent sure I heard him groan before he broke the kiss.  
  
His eyes momentarily met mine right before lead me to the bed, his hands never leaving my waist. The beating of my heart was going to make me deaf any moment from now. And the instant my back touched the mattress, I bit my lip as I realized what I just got into.  
  
“You’re absolutely making me crazy, Park Hae Won.” He told me in a slightly raspy voice.

I could only gulped because this was absolutely making me crazy too, I couldn’t even think straight anymore. I was beginning to feel shy as he continued to gaze at me, my face probably starting to turn red. Then he leaned his handsome face closer to mine but to my surprise, his warm lips landed on my jawline before eventually planting a kiss on my neck. The sensation was crazy scary I just had to hold my breath. I was starting to panic when he stopped and went back to kiss me on the lips once more, sending my eyes closed right away.  
  
It almost seemed like there was a raging storm inside of me but every time I looked at him and caught him gazing at me lovingly, I couldn’t help but acknowledge the calmness it gave me. I told myself to just focus on nothing but him right now. There was no use trying to rationalize things. I brought my hands to his head as if it was the most natural thing to do and got sucked into a trance once more. I slowly forgot about the thoughts in my head.  
  
He lips moved to my chin, to my jaw then back to my neck once more and somehow, it didn’t alarm me anymore. All I knew was that my entire body seemed to have turned really warm, fully sensitive to his every move.    
  
“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered right next to my ear before planting a kiss on my earlobe. “I love you.”  
  
I swear, his voice sounded like music to my ears and this was totally getting out of my control. My hands tugged on his hair as if my hands had a mind of their own. I felt his fingers softly grazing the curve of my waist once more, while his lips landed on my collarbone. I immediately held my breath, sending my eyes open. The ceiling was the first thing I had seen, I blinked a few times while his warm lips climbed to my chin before his face fully took over my vision.

His heavy gaze only lasted for a couple of seconds before his eyes fell to where his hand was at the moment. I followed his eyes and found out that he was already undoing the first button of my top with a single hand. I swallowed, as my mind seemed to have lagged at the sight. There was a part of me wanting to stop what he was doing but the other half was stopping that part of me, _if that made sense._  
  
 _I didn’t. I couldn’t stop him._  
  
He was already on the second button when he decided to crash his eager lips against mine once more, taking my full attention along with it. I draped my arms around his head, ready to get lost in the moment. _Not that I wasn’t yet, though._ His hands left my top as he swiftly rolled our bodies so I ended up on top of him, my hair almost landing on his face.  
  
“D-did you…take v-vitamins?” He asked, out of nowhere, slightly panting.  
  
How he managed to ask and get those words out of his mouth while our lips were locked was an absolute miracle.  
  
“Huh?” I asked in confusion as I leaned away from him.  
  
I saw him smirked before he kissed my right shoulder, which was now slightly exposed.  
  
“Well, I really don’t want…” He trailed off to plant another kiss on my collarbone. “You to get sick after this…” He paused leaving another kiss, this time right below my right ear.  
  
“Baek-” I was about to respond to his random remarks when I heard something.  
  
 _Doorbell._    
  
My hands suddenly tensed, as I turned my head towards the door. I was already distracted and even got more startled when he shifted our positions again. I ended up pinned between his body and the bed once more.   
  
“Leave it.” He stated as he brought his hands to cup my face and made me face him again before he kissed my lips.  
  
“A-are…you s…sure?” I replied in between his kisses.  
  
His reply turned out to be so inaudible.    
  
 _Doorbell._  
  
Ignored.  
  
 _Doorbell. Doorbell. Doorbell_  
  
He lifted his face above mine, our lips inches away from each other, and the tips of our noses almost touching.  I watched how his eyebrows furrowed, definitely looking annoyed.  
  
 _Doorbell._  
  
He closed his eyes, his lips forming into a thin line, took a deep breath before letting out of a harsh sigh. I didn’t know what had gotten to me or what was I exactly thinking at the moment but the corner of my lips turned up. I knew I shouldn’t be laughing at his frustration but he looked so cute. Of course, I didn’t let him see it, so I made sure that there wasn’t any trace of amusement on my face when he looked at me once more.  
  
“You should go.” I hesitated while he remained still on top of me.  
  
He tilted his head down before finally climbing off of me and sat on the edge of the bed. I also came to sit next to him as I buttoned my top again. His eyes were on my hand while I did it. He looked up to meet my eyes before he tilted his head down, burying it in his hands for a few moments.  
  
 _Doorbell_  
  
“Ugh! This is insane!” He hissed as he stood on his feet, his hands on his waist. “I swear I’m going to kill whoever it is.” He added before walking towards the door.  
  
I bit my lip as I saw him walking out. And when I was finally alone inside his room, everything started to sink in. My attention fell on the mattress behind me, my heartbeat grew wild once more.  
  
 _Did it all really happen? Were all those kisses real? Did he just almost take my top off?  
I gulped. I brought my hands to cover my face as embarrassment suddenly took over me. Oh my god._  
  
I threw my body on the bed, biting my lower lip as my thoughts were instantly flooded by every single thing we did a while ago. I couldn’t forget how his kissed my neck, my ear, my collarbone, my chin, my shoulder…  
 _Oh my god._ I screamed inside while I tightly shut my eyes. I was going to go crazy with all these thoughts filling my head right now. I roamed my attention around his room, hoping to distract myself but failed when all I thought about was his absence. His room felt bare without him. I even felt that familiar sinking feeling for not having him beside me.  
  


It must’ve almost been a good ten minutes since he left and I had my eyes closed for about six minutes already. I was still trying to clear my mind when I felt him climb on the bed. My eyes flew opened and saw him lying on his back right beside me. He was staring at the ceiling and I didn’t really know what to make out of his facial expression.  
  
“Who is it?”  I hesitated.    
  
He turned to face me before he pulled me closer to him. My head was on his arm and we’re now both staring at the ceiling. And I couldn’t help but felt anxious since he hadn’t answered my question yet.  
  
“I’m afraid I can’t kill the visitor.”  
  
It made me more nervous.  
  
“Who is it?” I asked once more, my eyes never leaving the ceiling.  
  
“It’s my mother.”  
  
I looked at him, his words hit me hard, making me all tense and more uncomfortable. He must’ve noticed and felt my reaction at the same time and maybe got a little worried. He brought me closer to him until my face was buried against his neck.  
  
I was speechless, blinking my eyes a few times as I replayed his last statement in my thoughts for a few times.  
  
“Since she’s here…” He trailed off as he held my chin and made me face him.  
  
We held each other’s gaze.  
  
“I want you to meet her.”  
  
  
 _I swallowed._  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
AN: Here's an update for you guys! I was originally planning to update over the weekend but I didn't want to keep you waiting anymore so here it is. I hope you liked this update. XD  
I also watched Baekhyun's IG live the other night and found out that he was sick and Ephemeral Baekhyun's sick too. :(  
Anyway, thank you for supporting my fic. I love you all. ♥


	25. Twenty Five

**Twenty Five**  
  
~♥~  
  
  
  


_“I want you to meet her.”_  
  
I blinked for about a couple of times right after he said it. His mother…Byun Baekhyun’s mother was right inside his house. I could slowly felt the nerves taking over me.  
  
My mind started to panic as I avoided his eyes. Somehow, I wanted to at least hide how scared I was at the moment. I could tell that he was waiting for me to say something but I couldn’t even form coherent thoughts right now.  
  
“Hey Baby...” He uttered, catching my attention right away. “It’ll be fine.”  
  
I swallowed once more as my head automatically moved sideways.  
  
“No.” I finally managed to say before I absent mindedly removed his arms around me so I could move away. “It’s not.”  
  
I sat, hoping that I could somehow convince myself to relax a bit, but failed when I started to fidget with my fingers. I closed my eyes at how things had ridiculously things turned. First, we were… _I gulped_ , we were just doing _our thing_ and now, in just a span of a few minutes, his mom’s here.  
  
 _I wasn’t ready for this, heck I haven’t even thought about this far…yet._  
  
I was so engrossed with my rattled thoughts that I had totally forgotten about his presence right next to me and was only made aware of it when I felt his hand tucking my hair behind me ear. The gentleness of his touch made it impossible for me to ignore him, I turned to him. His eyes were on what his hand was doing at first but went to meet my gaze after a few seconds.  
  
“What are you thinking of right now?” He asked, his fingers caressing my earlobe, I guess this was him trying to calm me down.  
  
I took a deep breath, momentarily shutting my eyes closed as I tilt my head down.  
  
“What if she doesn’t like me?” I voiced out before biting my lower lip. “Worse, what if she hates me?” I asked once more, this time turning to him.  
  
He didn’t say anything and just looked back at me instead. He looked so calm right now and I couldn’t overlook the subtle smile on his lips.  
  
“Hate you?” He said, his forehead creased before letting out of a chuckle.  
  
 _Did he just laugh?_ I was busy processing the thought of how his beautiful sounding laugh was totally unnecessary right now when he pulled me closer towards him, making me sit between his legs.  
  
“How is that even possible?” He asked as buried his face against my neck.  
  
“Baekhyun!” I scolded him as I leaned away from him.  
  
 _How dare he continued to be this affectionate when I was already panicking big time inside?_  
  
“What?” He asked innocently.  
  
“How can you still flirt with me when you have your mom in your house right now?” I was sure my eyes grew wide as I looked at him incredulously.  
  
I also took off his arms around so I could stand in front of him.  
  
He looked frazzled with how swift I just freed myself from him before letting out of another chuckle.     
  
 _Gosh, did he just laugh again?_  
  
“My god, Baek how do you even find this funny?” I asked in a matter of fact tone which instantly caught his attention.  
  
“What?” He asked once more.  
  
There was an obvious grin on his handsome face right now.  
  
“Can’t you see how complicated this is right now? I’m in your house...not to mention in these pajamas. She would immediately think I slept here.”  
  
“Okay…what’s so complicated about it?” A puzzled look took over his face.  
  
 _What? Was he seriously asking me?_  
  
“A-are you actually telling me that…” I swallowed as I saw him anticipate for my next words. “That your mom is used to see some girl in your house this early?”  
  
For a second, he appeared to be taken aback.  
  
 _Damn, Byun Baekhyun please tell me I was wrong._  
  
Without any words, he continued to stare at me for the next few seconds before looking away, smirking.  
  
“So, is that how you think of me?” I was certain he sounded hurt, the look on his eyes was strong. “And you’re not just some girl, I hope you are very well informed about that.”  
  
 _I felt guilty. I mean, I didn’t…of course I didn’t mean it that way._  
  
“No.” I sighed as my shoulders slumped. “Of course not Baekhyun.” I added as I dismissed my hesitance to come near him by sitting next to him on the bed once more.  
  
I immediately proceeded to stare at him but he refused to do the same by having his gaze steady on the floor. I was unsure but I lifted both of my hands to cup his face and made him look at me.  
  
“Sorry.” I muttered. “I was just so tensed, I guess I don’t know what I was saying.” I reasoned out and saw his eyes finally on me. “That was totally unnecessary.”  
  
I voluntarily took my hands off his face when he pulled me closer to him to plant a kiss on my temple.  
  
“I’m sorry, the thought of meting your mom just scares the hell out of me.” I said, pinned next to his body.  
  
“I understand how you must feel right now.” He said when we faced each other once more. “But as I told you, it’ll be fine.” His lips formed into a reassuring smile. “You have nothing to worry about…” He trailed off wet his lips. “She’s not like the mothers you see on the dramas. And if you’re so concerned that she’ll see you in pajamas, you should let it go. I already told her that you’re here because you looked after her sick son last night and that you made me feel so much better.” His smile went bigger.  
  
Sure, I was relieved with what he just said but not totally. I guess I wouldn’t until I finally meet her.  
  
“I promise.” He said once more as if he just read my mind. “She’s not the type to hate the ones I love.” He finished his statement with a slight pinch on my chin.    
  
 _I blushed with the way he said it.  
  
Gosh._  
  
***  
  
Baekhyun left me in the room when I asked him to give me time to at least make myself look presentable. I sprinted to the bathroom with my bag since I brought extra undergarments with me when I left Auntie’s house yesterday. Well, it wasn’t as if I was really thinking that I’d stay with him overnight though. I just mostly do it whenever I have to travel far. I know that sounded really defensive, though.  
  
After washing, I went to the third closet on the left. Since, I couldn’t really meet his mom with the clothes I came with yesterday, _because that would just be so unacceptable_ , I was left with no choice but wear one of the two dresses inside the closet. I took the light blue one out first. It’s a button down dress and it’s very pretty. Too pretty she might think that I was making this meeting a big deal, _which it really was for me,_ by the way.  
  
I took the rust colored one out next. It’s a wrap-around midi dress with very tiny mustard flower patterns. The three quartered sleeves styled beautifully in a slight puff. It’s simple but also very pretty, so I instantly decided to go with it.  
  
I just finished putting on a light make up before standing in front of his full body mirror as I examined myself. I paired the dress with my sneakers, which were thankfully white and had somehow went along with the dress. I tucked one side of my hair behind my ear before taking one last breath and left.  
  
When I got downstairs, I found the living room empty.  I went to the kitchen but no one was there too so I went back to the living room. I was roaming my attention around wondering where they were when I heard him behind me.  
  
“Hey Beautiful.”  
  
I turned around and saw him leaning on the wall, his hands inside his pockets, with a cocky smile on his face which somehow faded away when he searched me with his eyes from head to toe.  
  
“How do I look?” I hesitated.  
  
I saw him started to walk towards me.  
  
“Lovely.” He muttered as he stopped in front of me. “My mom will probably think that I’m the luckiest man on earth when she sees you.” This time moving closer, his hands meeting behind my waist.  
  
He sounded like he was kidding so I hit him on the arm.  
  
“I’m serious Baek, isn’t this too much? I don’t have extra clothes with me so I ended up wearing this-”  
  
“I told you, you look lovely. And the dress looks perfect on you just as I have imagined.” He said grinning. “Now, let’s go meet my mom. She’s waiting for you.” He added as he held me by the hand and walked me towards the back door.    
  
“Wait… where are we-” I was supposed to ask him where we’re going but dismissed it when we were finally out of the door.  
  
I had my jaw dropped. I was welcomed by a totally different view. I knew his house was big but I didn’t expect it to be this huge. There was a beautifully designed Backyard patio deck. There were several couches and chairs that made the place seemed like an outdoor living room. There was a huge pine tree on the left corner which offered a great amount of shade. I could see tiny lamps scattered on the corners of the wooden floors and I bet they must look so pretty at night.  
  
As an interior designer, I had a soft spot for this. I continued to roam my gaze around but immediately held my breath when I finally caught a sight of his mother, who was already looking at us. She was seated on the couch, with a mug on her hand.  I froze and he must have noticed it because I felt him move closer to me, draping an arm around me. When I turned to him, he gave a reassuring smile.  
  
As we walked closer to her, I couldn’t help but noticed how beautiful she looked. He mentioned that she wasn’t like the mothers you on dramas but she looked exactly like one. Her hair was short, probably just about two inches below her ears. One side tucked behind her ear leaving the pearl earring in full display.  Her eyes and lips resembled Baekhyun’s. She was wearing a beautiful white blouse paired with maroon pants. There was no doubt, she’s absolutely a celebrity’s mom.  
  
“Breathe, baby.” Baekhyun whispered right on my ear.  
  
So yeah, I must have been holding my breath the whole time. And it took every ounce of courage I have to bring myself to meet her eyes. She smiled as she put the mug down on the table in front of her.  
  
“Oh, so you’re the one keeping my son from opening the door right away.” I heard her say with a subtle amusement in her tone.  
  
I blushed, immediately feeling embarrassed.  
  
“Mom, c’mon. I told you, we were sleeping.” He said, facing me when he said the word _‘sleeping’._  
  
She chuckled as she moved her head sideways.   
  
“Okay, Okay I’m sorry. She looked really tense, I was just trying to make her laugh.”  
  
I blinked at her words as I forced myself to smile a bit.

_I should really stop being awkward. I swear._  
  
“Mom, this is Hae Won.” Baekhyun introduced, trying to stifle a laugh. “Hae Won, this is my mom, Ha Na.”  
  
“N-nice to meet you Mrs. Byun.” I stuttered as I smiled politely this time.  
  
“Ah finally…” Her smile became wider, the kind that reached her eyes and it instantly reminded me of Baekhyun’s. “The woman who’s making my son smile lately.” She added as he came closer to give me a hug.  
  
She went back to look at me after we broke the hug, this time from head to toe which undeniably made me feel conscious even more.  
  
“My son was right when he told me that you’re beautiful.” She remarked as she urged us to sit.  
  
I turned to look at Baekhyun who was sitting right beside me with a grin on his face. I didn’t know how to respond to that so I just ended up smiling at his mom instead. _Again._  
  
“I hope Baekhyun is not giving you a hard time Hae Won.” She stated though it sounded more like a question than a statement.  
  
“Mom.” Baekhyun whined. “Can you please come up with a more decent question?” He added, almost laughing.  
  
“What? What’s wrong with my question? That’s a pretty decent one. ” Her eyes grew wide as they both laughed.  
  
“Are you okay Hae Won?” Her unexpected question caught me off guard.  
  
I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out. Then she smiled at me while she put a hand over mine.  
  
“I…” I muttered, forcing my brain to cooperate and stop making a fool of myself in front of her. “I’m…” I turned to Baekhyun, who had nothing but an affection smile on his face. “I’m sorry, I just…” I sighed as I faced his mom again. “I just don’t know what to say right now.”

I momentarily closed my eyes in embarrassment.

“I didn’t really know I was going to meet you, I wasn’t ready. I mean it’s not like I don’t want to meet you of course, it’s just that this is all a lot for me to take in… I guess…” I trailed off when I noticed how breathless I sounded like.  
  
 _Oh my gosh._ _I must have been born to embarrass myself._  
  
She let out of a soft laugh.  
  
“It’s fine.” A reassuring smile painted her beautiful face. “I totally understand how you feel. Meeting your boyfriend’s mother must be nerve wracking right?”  
  
“Right.” I answered quickly, absent minded.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Baekhyun went back to his room. He mentioned about calling manager Kang about his schedule. And there’s no denying, how I felt a bit uneasy when he left me alone with his mom. I wanted to go with him but that would be a thousand times crazy.

So, I guess I’d have to overcome this all by myself for the next few minutes.  
  
Mrs. Byun and I were in the kitchen. She asked me to come with her while she cooked something for lunch. I offered to help her but she refused, telling me that she didn’t want to burden me and just asked me to sit and keep her company. So, I ended up hesitantly sitting on the high stool next to the counter as I watched her prepare the ingredients for the dish she’s making.  
  
“I can clearly tell that you have my son under your spell.” She asked, totally catching me off guard.  
  
 I stared at her speechless and blushing of course.  
  
“By the way he looks at you when you’re not looking reminds me of the same look at I get from his father before we got married.” She added, putting on the apron.  
  
“It must be hard, right?” She continued when I didn’t find the voice to respond. “I mean being with him, given that you have to deal with his celebrity status and all…” She added as she started to slice some of the ingredients.  
  
“Well…” I cleared my throat. “Well, it will be a lie if I say it isn’t.” I replied with a small smile.  
  
“So why did you do it in the first place?” She threw me a glance and there was a bit of seriousness in her tone somehow. “I’m pretty sure you already knew how difficult everything is going to be for the both of you, right?”  
  
I nodded, unable to muster any word but she continued to stare at me, obviously waiting for my response.  
  
“Yeah.” I answered, as I tilted my head down. “I knew what I was getting into and I am fully aware that it’s going to be complicated. That it might be bad for me, for him and for the both of us…” I trailed off to bite my lower lip, momentarily closing my eyes to get my act together.  
  
When I opened my eyes, I took a deep breath before speaking once more.  
  
“I also know that people might not like me, judge me…criticize me, simply for being with him….and they do.” I sighed as the memory of those two girls in the restaurant talking against me filled my thoughts. “I read comments on the internet about people wanting Baekhyun to be with Ara again.” I let out of a nervous laugh, trying to hold whatever emotion was building up inside me.  
  
I noticed that she stopped slicing when the chopping sound stopped. My eyes turned to her and saw a soft expression on her face. She looked sorry for me.  
  
“It was hard yes, I found myself searching about Kim Ara and then I would end up wallowing in self-pity because she’s someone I couldn’t really compete with…” I filled my lungs with air. “So, I tried…” I trailed off once more as the memory of us breaking up at the entrance of the hiking place ruled my mind.

“I mean walking away. I thought that if I broke up with him, it’ll fix everything but…” I moved my head sideways. “I was wrong because it only took me thirty minutes without him to realize how stupid I was for leaving him.” I let out of a soft laugh, mocking myself for what I did that day. “I couldn’t walk away, I couldn’t stand being apart from him. And honestly, I don’t know any reason why I was willing to risk it all apart from the fact that I love him.”  
  
I was so caught up with my thoughts that I had somehow forgotten that I was talking to his mom. And right when I got back to my senses, I panicked a bit, of course.  
  
 _Should I apologize for suddenly being so comfortable talking about those things?_  
  
But then I saw the corner of her lips turned up as she started to put the ingredients into the pan before mixing them. I, on the other hand, waited anxiously right where I was seated, totally aware of the fact that she hadn’t said anything yet. I was pretty sure I’d start overthinking any moment from now, so I roamed my attention around when she finally spoke.

“You know, I have always trusted my son’s judgments.” She paid me a glance. “But I’m not gonna lie when I first heard about him seeing someone again, it got me a bit worried.”  
  
She stopped what she was doing once more so she could meet my eyes.  
  
“I saw the photos.”  
  
 _I swallowed. Of course she would have seen it._  
  
“I remembered calling him to ask him if the rumors were real and he said yes. He said _‘Yes mom, she’s my girlfriend and they’re already telling me to break up with her so please don’t tell me to do the same thing because I fucking love her, mom’_.” She added trying to modulate her voice a bit, ending it with a smile. “Actually, I was a bit surprised at how straightforward he was at that time plus he used the _‘I fucking love her mom’_ thing, I mean he could have just said _‘I love her mom’_ but no… he had to use the _F_ word.” She let out of a soft laugh. “I was supposed to get mad at him for speaking that way but then I sensed how stressed he was at that time, I forgave him instantly.”  
  
She laughed once more, as she moved her head sideways.  
  
“He never really spoke that way before. He’s always been careful with his language when he’s talking to me and his dad.” Her eyes bore into mine. “So, it hit me, I realized that he was serious about this girl.”  
  
She walked towards the wall mounted cabinet to get something before coming back in front of the range.  
  
“And I’m glad that you seem to be equally, madly in love with him.” She stated, this time with a wide smile on her face. “But do remind him not to use the _F_ word when talking to me again, will you Hae Won?”  
  
I nodded.  
  
I smiled, genuinely for the first time because I finally felt at ease around her.  
  
Baekhyun was right, she wasn’t like the mothers I see in _Kdramas._  
  
  
***

We ate lunch together and I noticed Baekhyun kept looking at us while we talked. She asked me a bit about my family in Korea and back in Australia. She also asked about how Baekhyun and I met, so I told her a little about the old hiking place. She seemed amused the whole time we were exchanging words and I couldn’t be happier. By the look on his face, I could tell that Baekhyun was somehow wondering what happened while he left us alone a while ago. He’s probably wondering how on earth we were getting along now.  
  
“Uh, excuse me ladies but what kind of bonding did you two have while I wasn’t around?” He asked curiously.  
  
His mom and I both glanced at him at the same time.  
  
“Well,” I heard her say. “I told your girlfriend how much of a crybaby you were when you were little. Like how you refused to go to school without your favorite strawberry smoothie.”  
  
“What?!” He exclaimed with an incredulous look on his face.  
  
I, on the other hand, burst out laughing. I mean, obviously I heard that story for the first time.  
  
I saw how his forehead creased at her remarks while I tried to stifle my laugh because his ears started to turn red.  
  
“I see leaving you two alone is a bad idea.” He stated as he lifted a hand to scratch his head.  
  
“Why? That’s really cute Baek!” I reasoned out. “I mean I knew you love strawberries but not to that extent.” I added before I turned to his mom. “He must have been really cute that time, right Mrs. Byun?”  
  
“Very.” She agreed. “Especially with his puffy eyes, and red nose-”  
  
“For heaven’s sake Mom please just drop it.” He protested.  
  
“Oh no, please continue… I’d like to hear more-” I tried to disagree but ended up being cut.  
  
“Baby please, I swear I’m going to make you regret this later.” He said obviously threatening me.  
  
I almost laughed at him again but I decided to stop because, he seemed really embarrassed. I seldom see this side of him and I kind of liked it. This must be how he exactly felt everytime I embarrass myself in front of him, which I must note, happens a lot.  
  
“Okay, okay fine. I’ll stop.” I surrendered, still trying to stop myself from laughing.  
  
Before turning my attention to my food once more, I caught a glimpse of his mom watching us with a dreamy expression on her face.  
  
***  
  
By the time we finished eating, I offered to wash the dishes but Mrs. Byun insisted that she’d be the one to do it. I told her that I somehow felt a bit bad since I wasn’t able to help her cook a while ago too but she replied telling me that she’d let me do it next time.  
  
When it was time for her to go, she and I were at the doorstep while Baekhyun got his mom’s car ready. I was surprised that she drove herself all the way here. I mean she’s not that old considering that she must be in her early fifties. I just thought that she had a driver with her but I was wrong.  
  
“Can I ask you a favor?” She asked, all of a sudden while we both watched Baekhyun walked towards her car.    
  
“Of course.” I replied, turning to face her.  
  
“It’s going to be hard.” She shrugged. “I don’t know maybe it’s going to get harder as time goes by but…” She paused to turn to me. “But if you really love my son, which I believe you do, be with him no matter what happens Hae Won. Please don’t be with him now if you’re going to leave him later.” She sounded a bit sad when she said it. “I’ve never seen him this carefree and happy with someone in a long time. The kind of smile he has when you’re around, he lost it for a while and I’m so glad he’s got it back. Thanks to you.”  
  
 _I didn’t know what to say. My heart was about to melt with every word she said._  
  
“But if you must, I hope you won’t do it without a fight.” Her lips formed into a tight lipped smile.   
  
The impact of her words were so great that I had to blink a couple of times to process everything I just heard from her. I could sense her sincerity and I could as well tell how much her son’s happiness meant to her.  
  
I felt the corner of my lips turned up since I couldn’t really find the exact words for a decent response. We both remained silent until her black car appeared in front of us.  
  
“I hope this won’t be the first and the last time I see you.” She smiled dearly as she hugged me.  
  
“Yes, Mrs. Byun.” I answered.  
  
 _I really hoped to see her again._  
  
 “The next time we meet, I need you to stop calling me ‘Mrs. Byun’.”  
  
“Oh.” I uttered, unable to make something out of what he said.  
  
 _What did she mean by that exactly?_  
  
  
***  
  
We both went back inside his house right after she left. I was walking ahead of him towards the living room when he grabbed me by the wrist without a warning. He led me to the couch where he sat first before pulling me to sit on his lap. His hands immediately circling my waist as he buried his face against my neck.

_My gosh, he needed to stop doing this to my poor heart._  
  
“So what did my mother tell you exactly?” He asked, his breath fanning my skin.  
  
“Well….”  
  
“Aside from the strawberry and crying stuff.” He intercepted.  
  
I let out of a soft laugh which caused him to lean away, his furrowed brows in full display. He seemed like he was ready to pout, whine at my reaction and for making fun of him. But before he could open his mouth once more, I lifted my both arms, rested them on his shoulders while my hands played with his hair. I noticed how his face relaxed at the contact. I suddenly felt so soft at the sight of his handsome bare face.  
  
“She wants you to be happy.” I told him as I remember the look on his mom’s face.  
  
He didn’t answer, he went back to bury his face against my neck once more instead. And I ended up wrapping an arm around his head, while my fingers continue to play with his hair.  
  
We both remained quiet for a few moments and it was wonderful. It’s funny how I even the silence between us had become so meaningful.  
  
“Baby…” He muttered.  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
“Let’s go away…”  
  
“Huh?” I asked, unable to hide my confusion.  
  
He leaned away once again so we were already looking at each other now.  
  
“What are you talking about?”  
  
“Let’s go away… I mean, you know somewhere no one cares about us.”  
  
I was still not following him nor was I sure of what he meant so I continued to stare at him, waiting for him to elaborate.  
  
“I mean, you already know I’ve been meaning to go on a trip with you.” He stated.  
  
 _Was he serious?  
I mean, he looked like he was but…_  
  
“Just you.” I felt his hands around my waist pulling me closer to him. “And me.”  
  
I swallowed.  
  
“Just us.”  
  
His eyes, the way he looked at me, tell me how much he meant his  
  
  


_every word.  
  
~  
  
  
  
  
  
AN: Hi loves, I know this is a bit short. In fact, I was planning to give you a two-chapter update since i kept you waiting for almost a month for an update but I just couldn't finish chapter twenty six yet. Things just got a little bit crazy irl, so I decided to just update this one.  
  
PS. I'm excited for the next chapter, I really want to finish it soon and share it with you. I hope you are too. ^^ _


	26. Twenty Six

  
  
  
  
~♥~  


  
  
  
_“Just us.”_  
  
It turned out that he got Manager Kang to fix his schedule so he could have a two-day off from his rehearsals which was in a way great because he would be able to take a rest. Though how he got his manager to agree with him, _that_ I didn’t really know.

Another thing that got me surprised was when he told me that we’d go right away. I, of course, protested telling him that I at least have to go home and ask permission from my Aunt which he easily contradicted by suggesting to call her instead. He even told me that I need not worry about my things anymore because he already had them taken care of. How on earth he was able to do it that fast, I also didn’t have any idea.  
  
“It’ll be a surprise.” Was all he said when I asked him where he was planning to take me.  
  
Honestly, this got me a bit worried and excited at the same time. I mean of course, I’m sure it’d be a meaningful trip for the both of us since this was going to be our first time to be somewhere else apart from my mom’s hometown and Seoul. But then, considering that it would just be the two of us for the next couple of days got me a bit antsy as well. However, I knew I’d be a fool to refuse his request. So, after making a call to tell Aunt Sunny that I’d be away for a couple of days with Baekhyun, which actually got her a bit worried at first thinking how it’d be a bit risky for the both of us, she eventually agreed.  
  
We went back to his room. I was standing right behind him while he picked the clothes he was going to bring for the trip. Somehow, I couldn’t help but fidget at the thought that he asked someone to buy clothes for me again. And it must have been written all over my face that he ended up asking me right away. When I told him what was bothering me, he just assured that he already asked someone to take care of all the things I would be needing for the trip. Well, that someone turned out to be his cousin, Soo Ah which made me uncomfortable for a second, now that I knew that she was friends with Kim Ara. _I mean it’s really awkward, right?_  
  
The truth was, I wanted to insist to just take care of it myself but I was sure he would get why I was acting this way and we’d probably end up talking about Ara once more. So I decided to keep my mouth shut instead.  
  
  
***  
Afternoon came.   
  
We were already outside and Mr. Yoo just came back with about six shopping bags of different sizes on both hands. He must have met with Soo Ah, I concluded.  
  
“I just hope she got you proper clothes this time.” I heard him say before asking Mr. Yoo to take the bags to the compartment of his car. “I don’t want you freezing again this time.” He added as he opened the door of the passenger’s seat for me.  
  
As I got in, I tried my hardest to stifle a laugh as I remembered how annoyed he was with the clothes Soo Ah bought for me the last time.  
  
“Don’t worry, I bought the padding jackets from the closet.” I informed him as soon as he got inside the car.  
  
He replied with a smile before talking to Mr. Yoo, informing him that he could take a few days off while he’s away. A wide smile crossed the man’s face, obviously delighted.  
  
We left at around four in the afternoon. Seoul was a bit busy on a Thursday. The traffic was not that bad but there were still so many vehicles on the road. I also noticed a few ads with his face as we drove out of the city.  
  
“Your popularity is no joke Mr. Byun.” I commented when we passed by a large Led monitor with his concert details.  
  
“And I’m about to forget about that for a few days and concentrate on you Miss Park.” He replied, glancing at me as he took my hand and placed it on his lap.  
  
I wasn’t sure but there’s something about him holding my hand while he drove that always made me feel giggly inside, instantly giving me the butterflies.  
  
“Is it okay?” I asked him, trying my best not to be distracted by how hot he looked driving in one hand right now.  
  
_When he paid me a glance, I almost lost it._  
_My god Park Hae Won, it’s just a glance from you hot boyfriend, don’t overreact._  
  
“What do you mean?” His forehead creased.  
  
“Well…” I moved my head sideways. “I mean your tour is coming. How did you get them to agree with this?”  
  
“I asked Manager Kang to make arrangements and since I got sick, he didn’t ask further questions.” He answered, his attention on the road. “I told him that I’m with you though.”  
  
“What did he say?”  
  
Fully aware of the conflict they had a few weeks ago, I couldn’t help but ask.  
  
“I can’t say he’s fine with it totally but I’m pretty sure he understands.” He replied, ending it with a subtle smile while his thumb stroke my hand.  
  
_Oh please Baekhyun stop it._  
_Actually, don’t._  
  
Ugh, I must be crazy.  
  
  
***

We have been driving for about three hours and it was already getting dark. I still didn’t have a single clue where he was taking me since he refused to tell me about it in the first place. We’re totally out of the city and the streets were almost empty of vehicles now, so we must be going somewhere remote. Tall trees were on the either side of the road and it straightaway reminded me of my mom’s hometown. The rays from the setting sun struggling to find its way through the leaves, complementing with the golden Autumn leaves.  
  
I could already feel that this trip was going to be so special. I couldn’t explain it but I don’t feel that scared about any of this anymore. Actually, it was as if like this was the best thing to do. We both needed this. We need to get away from the drama, the prying eyes of the people, the internet, everything. _Just everything._  
  
I continued to watch him as he drove, his hands controlling the steering wheel, his gaze steady and solely focused on the road.  
  
“You look good when you drive.” I blurted, absolutely random and out of nowhere.  
  
I was so surprised with my words when I realized that I was already _thinking out loud._  
  
He instantly turned to me, a growing grin on his lips.

“I must be driving you crazy, right?” He was obviously teasing me and I couldn’t help but respond with a slowly growing blush.  
  
“I’m gonna go sleep for now.” I told him when I couldn’t think of a better excuse for what I just blurted out.  
  
I saw him threw me a skeptical look so I faked a yawn before closing my eyes and that instantly sent him laughing. The corner of my lips turned up as the sound of his laugh filled the car.  
  
“I love you.”  
  
The gentleness in his voice caused my eyes to open, instantly meeting his before he turned to the road.

“And you absolutely drive me crazy by doing nothing but stare at me.”  
  
My overwhelmed self was unable to come up with a response to his words. I was left watching him for the next few seconds before I had the nerve to open my mouth.  
  
“I love you.”  
  
He turned to me once more with an affectionate expression on his face. The glimmer in his eyes made more evident by the rays of the setting sun.  
  
_And yes, you’re driving me crazy Byun Baekhyun._  
  
  
***

I didn’t realize that I had indeed fallen asleep if he didn’t wake up me. I instantly looked around and found out that we had already arrived. The sun had completely set so it was hard for me to check where we were exactly.

I got out of the car and the cool Autumn breeze welcomed me right away. I wrapped my arms around myself since I was just wearing the same dress I wore this morning. Then I heard the rustling of the leaves of the trees and just paid attention to the towering trees surrounding us. I looked up and saw the ocean of black satin like skies with the faintest glints from the stars.  
  
“Where are we?” I turned the other way so I could ask him but he was suddenly nowhere to be found. “Baekhyun?” I called as I walked to the driver’s seat to check on him but he wasn’t inside.  
  
I roamed my attention around but it was just too dark now that I couldn’t even make something out of my surroundings.  
  
“Baek where are you?” I called out once more, already trying to steady my voice because I was starting to get worried.  
  
I turned around, walked a few feet away from the car but there was still no trace of him. My heartbeat doubled, my knees starting to get weak at the thought of him really disappearing.  
  
_No, he must be trying to pull a prank on me right now. And honestly, I wasn’t liking it._  
  
“Baekhyun this isn’t funny anymore. If this was a joke, I swear I’m not going to forgive you.” I warned him but no response came from him the next few seconds.  
  
God, I was about to cry but stopped myself when I heard movements somewhere I couldn’t even distinguish. My hands were already slightly trembling. I looked up and saw the trees and the stars but they had somehow turned creepy, even the wind sounded and felt eerie.  
  
“Baekhyun?” I called out a bit louder this time.

I was already biting my lip, trying my hardest to calm myself. I walked back and forth, not really knowing where to go exactly. I wanted to find him but it was just too dark.  
  
“B-baek, you’re already scaring me…where are you?” I said, almost breathless from walking around and just when I was about to walk back to the car to get my phone and try to call him, someone grabbed my hand before sending me crashing against his body.  
  
Though I wasn’t able to check who it was, I instantly knew it was him. His scent filled my senses as he hugged me tightly. I closed my eyes because of so many reasons. One, because he finally showed up, two because what just happened really scared me and three because of his warmth sending all kinds of relief to my body.  
  
“I’m sorry Baby, I didn’t mean to scare you I promise.” He apologized and he sounded as breathless just as I was.  
  
I couldn’t reply nor even look at him for a second since I was still busy trying to calm myself down.  
  
“It wasn’t supposed to take me that long but I couldn’t find the stupid switch.”  
  
_Switch? Did he just say switch?_  
  
I looked up to meet his eyes and I was a bit confused how I could somehow see his face now. I wasn’t able to open my mouth yet for verbalize my question when he looked away. I followed his gaze and was instantly mesmerized by what I saw.  
  
A few meters away from where we were standing was a huge, rustic, cabin house. It stood so unbelievably beautiful, I suddenly loss for words. I was totally in awe in the next few seconds. When he let me go, I made a few steps forward so I could marvel at the beauty right before my eyes.

It’s a two-story house with a very pretty veranda deck decorated with a string of light bulbs on the second floor. I wasn’t really sure if the windows were made of glass or something else, all I knew was the fact that they seem to glisten. I looked around and it was just then I noticed the light posts surrounding the spacious, cleared area that around the house. A few feet away from us was an array of wooden tables and benches under the beautiful yellow light bulbs.  
  
_This place totally felt like a dream._  
  
A while ago, I was so certain I was about to cry out of fright but now I felt like crying because of how magical this place was.  
  
“My god, this place is so beautiful Baekhyun.” I said as I turned back to look at him when I was finally able to find the words.  
  
I saw him standing with a satisfied look on his face, his hands inside his pockets. We both held each other’s gaze for a few moments before he walked towards me. I turned around to the view of the house once more just as he wrapped an arm over my chest, the other on around my stomach, obviously giving me the most satisfying back hug.  
  
“I knew you’d love it here.” He stated, his voice just over a whisper as I felt his lips at the back of my head.  
  
I lifted my hands to cling on his arm over my chest.  
_This was absolutely heartwarming._  
  
“I can’t wait to spend the next few days with you.” He added as he pulled me closer.  
  
_Someone please tell me I wasn’t in a movie or something._

 

***  
  
The interior was equally beautiful as with its exterior. The walls were made of wood and glass and they looked elegant and vintage at the same time. I looked up and couldn’t help but admire the simple but very pretty chandelier. The lighting all over the house had the right amount dim that radiated a very cozy ambiance.  
  
The living room was on the farthest left of the spacious house. There was a gray couch with about three chairs of the same color beautifully positioned around the table. Right on the left was a wooden dining table with what seemed to be a bunch of fresh Baby’s Breath as its centerpiece.  
  
I had to blink my eyes twice when I saw a fireplace and there was a cozy looking couch in front of it. I instantly concluded that this place was absolutely perfect in winter.  
  
There was just a lot of beautiful spots inside the house. As an interior designer, I had seen numerous houses and apartments that also looked exceptional but this house was just so different. It’s beyond lovely. _I could live here forever._  
  
“How did you know about this place?” I asked Baekhyun when I saw him came with our things from the car.  
  
“It’s mine.”  
  
“What?” My response came in really quick.  
  
“Well, technically, not yet.” He answered as he placed the shopping bags on the floor to come near me. “This is owned by someone I know and he’s selling it to me.”  
  
“So are you gonna buy it?  
  
_I really wish he would. The place’s too beautiful to let go._  
  
He shrugged. “It depends.”  
  
“Depends on what?”  
  
“On how our stay here would turn out.” He told me as he cupped my face using his both hands before planting a kiss on my slightly parted lips.  
  
His warm lips were only pressed against mine for a brief second because he had already had his back on me as he took the shopping bags on his hands once more as he headed to the second floor.  
  
I was left blinking my eyes for about a couple of times.  
  
_How this trip would turn out._  
My thoughts automatically wandered to what happened in his room this morning. I remembered how he kissed me…  
  
_Park Hae Won!_

I scolded myself before my crazy even had the chance to be more creative.  


***

I was currently in the kitchen. It was as beautiful as the other parts of the house too. I found every part of it so aesthetically looking that I spent about a couple of seconds staring and appreciating every single thing in there. However, aside from the interior details, one more thing that truly amazed me was the fridge. It was filled with everything that we could possibly need.  
  
I was already hungry and I knew Baekhyun was too, so I decided to make something we could eat tonight. I decided to make Bolognese using my mom’s recipe and thankfully the fridge had all the ingredients I needed. I prepared and set everything on the counter, took the apron, tied my hair into a loose ponytail before starting.  
  
Time passed, I was already checking the pasta out if it’s ready when I saw him coming in. I hurriedly took one noodle out from the casserole and brought it to my mouth to see if it was already cooked but then he stood next to me and decided to stare at me which of course got me so conscious. I turned away, getting a little flustered that he chose to show up right at this exact moment. However, being his silly self, he stepped on the other side so we ended up facing each other once again. He took the hand that I was using to eat, letting the noodle that was still about three inches sticking out of my mouth.  
  
I was so surprised with what he just did, my mouth stopped moving. I was completely convinced that I looked like a startled idiot staring back at him right now.  
  
_What was he trying to do exactly?_  
  
Since, I couldn’t really speak, I slightly tilted my head up intending to finish eating the noodle when he, all of a sudden and definitely without a warning, leaned his face so close to mine. And the next thing I knew his mouth was on the other end of the noodle.  
  
_Oh god, someone help me please before I start hyperventilating._  
  
I could clearly see every detail of his face. His long lashes as he had his eyes on the now probably two-inch noodle. As well as the hint of subtle smirk on his lips when he finally met my eyes. My, already panicking mind was telling me to cut the noodle but I was too scared to even make a move, especially now that there was barely an inch of space left between our mouths.  
  
I blinked my eyes because that was the only movement I could execute at the moment. I literally froze with my face already feeling very hot. Then I saw the corner of his lips turned up as I felt his hands on my nape before tilting his head on the right. And with one swift move, his lips eventually grazed over mine as he finally finished the noodle.  
  
My eyes remained opened for a few brief moments until I realized what he was _already_ doing. He was kissing me.  
  
_First I was trying to eat and now he was trying to eat-_  
My mind stopped there right away just about the right time he stopped what he was doing too. He made a step back and let go of me. I looked at him and saw the cocky smile that had now taken over his lips.  
  
“It’s good.” He told me, his eyes twinkling in amusement. “I mean the noodle.” He trailed off as he made a few steps backwards. “But…it wasn’t as great as your lips, of course.” He added, his signature Baekhyun smile, the one that reached his eyes, on full display.  
  
I couldn’t say anything as I watched him left.  
  
_That smile, that short kiss…the butterflies in my stomach right now…turning into birds really fast…_  
It was as if he casted a spell over me. All I could do was blink my eyes as I tried to process what just happened.

 _How could he just leave after that?_  
  
Still without a word, I turned to go back what I was initially doing. However, right when I saw the noodles, I knew for a fact that I would never look at them the same way again.  
  
_Ugh, Byun Baekhyun._  
_Please take it easy on my heart._  
  
  
***

It was a cold night but was still tolerable that we ended up taking our dinner outside. I guess, I wasn’t the only one smitten by the view of the arrayed wooden tables under the string of light bulbs. He helped me to set the food on one of the tables, came back to the house and brought a glass of wine when he got back. When I asked him where he got it, he just told me that his friend must be trying to impress him by making sure we would have everything we need in our stay here and that it was a way to convince him to buy the property.  
  
We both enjoyed the view and the surroundings as we ate. We were seated facing each other and I was trying so hard to concentrate on my food but found it so difficult because I was so well aware how his eyes never left me for a couple of minutes now. My face was starting to feel hot and I was certain I’d start acting awkward around him anytime.  
  
_Especially when all I could think of, was what he did in the kitchen._  
  
“Ah, this is really nice.” He stated.  
  
I was sure that he finally looked away, so I turned to face him. I saw how he leaned away and roamed his attention around before he tilted his head up to look at the sky.

“I don’t want this to ever end.” He said as he turned to me again. “I hope I could stare at you like this…” His eyes boring into mine. “As long as I want.”  
  
I swallowed, as thee butterflies in my stomach had slowly come to life for the _nth_ time today.  
  
“As long as I need.”  
  
I held his gaze for as long as I could before my brilliant mind finally came up with something.

“You’re aware of how cheesy you sound right now, right?” I asked, not sure if I was trying to tease him or what.  
  
Yes, my brain pretty much knew how to ruin _the moment._  
  
He laughed, an amuse expression taking over his handsome face. The sound of his laugh resonated and filled the quiet. I was left amazed at how his eyes beautifully formed into crescents as he laughed. Right when he stopped, I saw him stood on his feet. I was left wondering in my seat as I watched him walked towards me. Without any word, he gently took my hand and urged me to stand. He took me a few feet away from the table, stared at me for a few seconds before gently pulling me into a hug.  
  
_Gosh, this man._  
  
As I felt his hands on my back, I found mine wrapped around him too. His scent slowly filled my senses, his heartbeat making its way to my ears. I l love, I just love how his arms felt so good around me, making me feel absolutely secured. For the next few moments, I was busy trying to figure out just how much I love his hugs when I heard his voice.

“Do you think there are falling stars around here?”  
  
I wasn’t expecting that from him so I leaned away and threw him a puzzled look.

“First, you’re being cheesy, now you’re talking about falling stars?” I replied with a growing smile on my lips.  
  
“Well you know what they say about wishing when you see one, right?” He explained.

I laughed at him as I went back to hugging him again.  
  
“What are you going to wish for?” I asked after a few brief moments of silence.  
  
I felt him took a deep breath as his leaned his head against mine, tightening his hand around me.  
  
“I’d wish for a day to come when I could tell the world about you…” He trailed off as I momentarily felt his lips on my forehead.

My heart instantly felt like melting at the contact of his soft lips on my skin.  
  
“I wish I could tell them how much love I have for you. I want them to know how great of a person you are…I want to assure them that I am loved by an amazing woman.” His hand started to caress the back of my head.  
  
_Oh gosh Byun Baekhyun._  
_Please let me survive what he’s about to say. I prayed._  
  
He gestured to face me, so we ended up staring at each other.  
  
“I want people to know how your smile, your blushing cheeks, your beautiful eyes and lips, your fragrant hair, your voice…the feeling I get when I tuck your hair behind your ear…” He paused as he did exactly the same thing. “The scent of your neck that I really love when I bury my face against it…” He continued as he brought a hand on it. “And all your clingy little ways…” I could almost hear his smile when he said the word _clingy._ “Drive me insane.”  
  
I felt my lips forming into a smile. My heart warm behind my chest.

I wish that there will come a time when all we have to ever do is love each other without having to worry about what other people have to say…” He paused and was not able to say anything for a few seconds so it got me a bit concerned.  
  
I was certain I saw a hint of sadness in them.  
  
want to give you a normal relationship.” He stopped once more, this time to wet his lips. “Not like this where we have to hide so there won’t be another issue of leaked photos.”  
  
I could sense his guilt by the way he talked and by the way his eyes communicated with mine. I couldn’t count as to how many times he had already express his thoughts about this. And there’s no doubt that it also kind of made me sad too but I didn’t want us to focus on it right now, so I removed my hands around him and took it to his cheeks.  
  
“Yes.” I started as I smiled at him. “What we have is challenging, it’s hard, it’s complicated but you know what it also means?”  
  
I watched as his forehead creased a bit due to my question. I stared at him as I gently brushed my thumbs against his skin.  
  
t’s special and it’s worth it…” I trailed off as I suddenly felt like crying. “And it’s everything I could ever ask for.” I bit my lip to make sure my tears wouldn’t fall. “As long as it’s with you, I don’t mind having to go through all of these.”  
  
The look on his face had become so soft as he momentarily closed his eyes before taking my hands off his face and brought them around his neck.  
  
t’s such a relief that you’re mine.” He said as he leaned his forehead against mine.  
  
His hands finding their way at the curve of my waist.  
  
“Why?” I asked, curious.  
  
His eyes were closed so I did the same thing.  
  
can’t bear the thought of another man doing this to you…”  
  
He paused and I waited for his words with my eyes closed but none came so I leaned away from him.  
  
“Doing what?” I asked, meeting his eyes.  
  
We continued to stare at each other for probably a good ten seconds before I felt one of his hands on my neck, his thumb delicately tracing my jaw.  
  
“This…” He muttered before pulling me closer to him.  
  
His lips grazed right above mine for a moment before dismissing any form of distance between us. It was crazy how that gentle touch sent shivers to my spine right away. My eyes automatically closed at the contact. It felt so good I couldn’t stop the corners of my mouth form into a small smile before kissing him back. As the wind blew, my mind was drawn to concentrate on the warmth given by our lips. He tilted his head to one side to have a better access of my mouth, his hands intertwining with my hair as he held my head steady. It’s crazy how his every move drew me in, deeper into the trance we’re both in right now. When I felt him tug on my lower lip and I couldn’t help but hold on to him tightly for support, tiptoeing to adjust to his height.  
  
_This. And every little thing he does makes everything worth it._  
  
I was starting to get breathless and I was sure that he was too because we were almost panting as the kiss slowed down. I knew we were about to stop any second from now and had already set my mind to it when he, without any warning, sent me into a dip dance pose, bending me backwards while lifting my other leg up with his hand. I was so startled but my shriek went muffled in his kisses and for some reasons, I wanted to laugh because of what he did.  
  
“You..re craz…zy.” I struggled to say as I gently hit him on the shoulder.  
  
I was sure I heard him chuckle as I felt his smile against my mouth before planting a firm and steady kiss on my lips one last time.  
  
know.” He agreed with an amused tone and look on his face.  
  
We were still in the same position, his eyes meeting mine. He looked nothing but handsome under the crisp Autumn sky. Sure, I could see the stars above through my peripheral vision but none of them compared to the glimmer in his eyes.  
  
_Right then I realized that the most beautiful star in the universe was holding me in his arms right now._  
  
Bringing me back on my feet, he stepped away and gave me his signature Byun Baekhyun smile. Yes, the one that I love the most, the one that reached his eyes.

***  
  
We were in the living room near the fireplace. The large, cozy couch was forsaken as we were both on the floor. He was leaning against his back against it though. I, on the other hand was sitting between his legs, with his hands around me as we were both covered by a thick blanket.

It had become so cold that the warmth from the fireplace was nothing else but amazing. I watched the fire as they flicker accompanied by the guttering sound they make with satisfaction. I could also feel his breathing as I was leaning against his broad chest, his head resting just above mine.  
  
I closed my eyes, wanting to savor every little thing this moment had to offer. I used to compare his hugs to being in front of a fireplace on a cold day and having to experience it now altogether just made me the happiest in the world.

 _Oh how I wish this moment to last forever._  
  
“Baek?” I uttered, my eyes still shut as I already felt so sleepy.  
  
“Hmm?” He replied, as he tightened his hold around me.  
  
I didn’t know why but the moment I heard his voice, my heart felt like melting. I was suddenly speechless. I was sure I initially wanted to thank him for this trip but now I just didn’t know what to tell him anymore.  
  
Then I heard him smirked.  
  
“I know Baby…I know…” He said as he gently rubbed his hand over my arm. “And I love you too.” He added before I felt him kiss me on the cheek.  
  
I smiled, finding it funny how he could seem to read me so well now.  
  
“Am I that obvious?” Now, with an obvious sleepy voice.  
  
He chuckled.  
  
”Yeah. It’s so obvious that you’re head over heels in love with me.” He teased, his beautiful laugh filled the entire room. “I can’t blame you though.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at his confidence.  
  
_Well, he’s not wrong though. I must be head over heels in love with him._  
_There was no way I wasn’t._  
  
  
_***_  
  
I didn’t know how long I was still able to hold my consciousness up before I finally dozed off. The next moment I knew, I felt him carrying me in his arms. I also heard a door being opened, his footsteps on the wooden floor and when my body finally landed on something soft, which I believe must be the bed, I did try to open my eyes. However, even his handsome face seemed to lull me to sleep more. I had the feeling that he was about to leave and I didn’t like the idea, so my half awake self reached for his arm, urging him to lie next to me.

“Don’t leave…” I heard myself say.  
  
He said something but my brain just couldn’t make something out of it anymore. I knew that this would just prove how clingy I was already getting towards him but I didn’t care anymore. He might laugh at me because of this but I’d deal with that tomorrow.  
  
_I just need to feel him right next to me right now._  
  
He did climb on the bed once more and positioned right beside me, tucking the blanket in the process. When I still couldn’t feel his warmth, I moved closer to slip an arm around his body so I could hug him and rest my head against his chest. Then he started playing with my hair and did it for a couple of seconds before I heard something that made my even very sleepy self blush.  
  
“I’m going to forgive you for sleeping on me tonight.”  
  
I knew what he meant exactly.  
  
So, I was left biting my lower lip before sleep finally knocked me off.  
  
  
***

9:13 AM  
  
The extraordinary ambiance and scent of the place welcomed me the very moment I woke up. It smelled of wood and trees and I could also feel the fresh air brushing against my face. Curious, I struggled to open my eyes and looked for the source of the wind. It was an open window, a glass one. I immediately caught a sight of the autumn leaves from the towering trees outside, the mass foliage dancing with the air.  
  
_Can this place get more perfect?_  
  
I roamed my attention around the bedroom which I had seen for the for first time since we arrived, considering how I fell asleep last night. Just like what I had imagined, it’s a beautifully designed rustic bedroom. I was on a big, cozy, wooden bed with plain beige colored comforters and pillows.  
  
The room was spacious. There were about three glass windows adjacent to each other with decorative bulbs hanging from one end to another. On the rightmost corner of the room stood an Instagram worthy, probably six feet book shelf filled with books and next to it was a wooden table for reading with an equally shabby chic looking chair.

I was so mesmerized with my surroundings that I had totally forgotten about Baekhyun. He wasn’t next to me anymore, nor he was inside the room. I instantly wondered of his whereabouts. I took off the blanket that was still covering half of my body, sat for a bit before getting off of the bed. I walked barefoot inside the room and the wooden floor felt so cool and good on my skin.  
  
I passed by a full length mirror and realized that I was still wearing the same dress that I came in from yesterday.  
  
_Really Park Hae Won? I hissed, scolding myself._  
_I couldn’t believe I was on a trip with my boyfriend and I fell asleep with the same clothes._  
_Ugh, I hate myself._  
  
I definitely have to take a shower and get changed. With this thought filling my head, I forgot about how I was initially trying to look for him and went to find the bathroom instead. When my eyes laid on an ajar door on the left, I concluded that it’s the bathroom. I walked towards it, totally unprepared of what I was about to see as soon as I got closer.  
  
_Baekhyun. A half naked Baekhyun to be exact._ He was wearing jeans with no top on and barefoot just like I was, while drying his hair with a towel. He just obviously finished taking a shower. I couldn’t help but gulped, accompanied by the heating of my face and drying of my throat at the sight of his body.  
  
_Oh my god. I can’t be in this state this early in the morning._  
  
I made a step back, scared that he might catch me peeking. I walked back to the bed hastily and ended up sitting while trying to gather coherent thoughts in my head. I blinked a few times before I thankfully caught a glimpse of the shopping bags right next to the bedside table.  
      
I was busy checking on each of them when I heard him walked in. He was now wearing a plain white shirt and I thought that he never seemed to run out of white shirts. I wasn’t complaining though.  
  
_In fact, I think that he must be aware of how good looking he is in it._  
  
I froze, like a _fangirl_ who just saw him for the first time.

“I see someone’s finally awake…”  
  
I knew he was already trying to tease me but for some reasons I couldn’t stop looking at him right now. He looked really dashing to me right now with his wet hair falling over his eyes. Gosh, I must be out of my mind with the amount of urge I currently have to snuggle with him.

“Hey baby, are you okay?” He asked from across the bed. “What’s with that look?” He asked once more as he walked towards me.  
  
_Oh, nice. So, my expression just gave away again._  
  
“What’s wrong?” He cupped my face, pouting.  
  
_My god, he had the nerve to pout right now. I hate it when he does it, he’s so cute I want to punch him. If he only knew how much I was suffering inside now._ I was a hundred percent sure that I was _fangirling_ over him right now which was crazy because he’s my boyfriend.  
  
I removed his hands off me as I sat on the bed and he quickly followed suit. I felt his eyes on me but I refused to turn to him.

“So, are you telling me about it or what?” The gentleness in his voice didn’t escape my ears.

I sighed and I was aware that I sounded so frustrated which of course might have made him more confused.  
  
“I’m so stressed.” I finally told him ending my statement with a gloomy sigh.

“Why?” His reply was quick. “Did you have a nightmare?”

“NO!” I stood in front of him.  
  
His eyes grew wide at my slightly modulated voice.

“I’m stressed because…” I paused, hesitating if I should tell him the real reason.

“Because?”

“Because you’re Byun Baekhyun.”

“What?” He threw me a puzzled look. “If I remembered it correctly you just told me last night that it didn’t really matter to you if…”

I knew what he meant and that was totally not the issue here.

“No, no, no… that’s not what I meant.” I clarified with the right amount of firmness in my tone.

“Then what is this about?”

I bit my lower lip as I totally regretted to have started this conversation. I should’ve kept it to myself. I should’ve suffered silently.  
  
We gazed at each other for a couple of seconds before I started t fidget, biting my lower lip.

“I swear. You’d better stop biting that lip or I’ll jump on you right away and help you out with that.”  
  
I could feel the threat in his voice, so I stopped biting my lip right away, scared that he’d really do it. Knowing Baekhyun, _he’s a man of his words._

 _“_ It’s nothing.” I denied, certain that I would end up embarrassing myself again.

“This isn’t what you call nothing Park Hae Won.”  
  
Just the mention of my complete name made me realize how he had taken all of these seriously now. I looked away, momentarily contemplating my next moves.  
  
I didn’t want to get him angry. I knew what he’s like when he’s mad and I didn’t want any of that right now. Not when we’re both away on a trip together. So, right after a moment of _contemplation,_ I decided to just tell him the real reason of my behavior. Accepting the fact that I’d end up looking like an idiot not matter what I would say anyway.

“Whydoyouhavetobesohandsome?” I said breathlessly and in a low voice volume.  
  
His eyes grew wide.

“What?” The incredulous look on his face never left as he asked me for clarification. “What did you just say?”

I closed my eyes in defeat.  
  
“I said WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO HANDSOME RIGHT NOW. It’s stressing me out.” I said putting emphasis on every word.  
  
I was expecting him to burst out laughing but he never did, or at least not yet. He just smiled, the corners of his lips forming a curve as he stretched his hand to grab me by wrist, pulling me to sit on his lap afterwards.  
  
“So, you’re telling me that you were stressed out because of how good looking I am right now?” This time, it was obvious that he was trying his best to stifle a laugh.  
  
I didn’t answer.

“Are you…” He trailed off as he seemed to be thinking about something. “Are you perhaps on your period Baby?”

“My god Baekhyun no, I’m not.” My response came in quick accompanied by the widening of my eyes as I hit him.

He laughed, his eyes forming into a thin line.

“Okay so, I must be really damn attractive in your eyes.” He said, trying to keep the seriousness in his tone. “I’m sorry Baby but I can’t do anything about it.” He pursed his lips. “Don’t worry as soon as this trip is over I’ll give my mom and dad a call and blame them for my good looks.”  
  
His blabber earned him another slap on the arm.  
  
“Well. I guess you should also know how stressed I was last night staring at you, thinking how rude it was of you to be so beautiful and leave me hanging.”

I knew what he was talking about.

“I’m sorry I guess I was just so tired last night.” I reasoned out.

“It’s okay.” He replied. “You better not do it tonight.”  
  
I held my breath.  
Blinked my eyes a couple of times.  
  
“I’m gonna go take a shower now. Bye.” I blurted out as I stood and walked away.  
  
Tensed, I headed to the bathroom without paying him a single glance.  
  
  
***  
  
Right after taking a shower, I went down so I could prepare us something to eat. Baekhyun received a few phone calls which I knew nothing about since he took all of them in the living room while I was in the kitchen.  
  
When we were done eating, he told me that he planned to take me hiking after lunch since his friend told him that there’s a trail we could check nearby if we’re interested. I couldn’t help but be ecstatic at the thought of hiking once again. I missed the old hiking place and it had been a while since we got there together, so this got me so excited.  
  
2:27PM  
  
I went back to the bedroom to check the other available clothes his cousin got for me. Since I was already wearing jeans, I thought I should just change the gray shirt I was wearing into something _thicker_. She got me a knitted, khaki sweater, a few spaghetti strapped tops. There were also two dresses which I didn’t really check well as of the moment and probably the last shopping bag contained sleeping clothes which I also have not checked yet. I decided to wear the maroon spaghetti strapped top inside the thick, knitted khaki sweater. The sleeves of the sweater was pretty long covering most of my fingers. It also felt so warm and cozy against my skin.

When I got down, he was already waiting for me outside. He was wearing the same jeans and white shirt from awhile ago but with a black denim jacket on top of it now, brown high cut, hiking boots a little bit similar to what I was wearing as well.  
  
He held my hand as we both made our way to the woods.  
  
  
***  
  
The fallen leaves crushed underneath our feet as we went deeper into the trails. I think it had been almost forty minutes since we left the house. I kept asking him if he knew the way for several times now and I also kept getting the “I’m trying my best” answer from him which of course got me a bit worried. He would laugh at my reaction and I would end up hitting him.

“How long is your tour going to be?” I asked him, out of nowhere, realizing that I didn’t know much about it yet.

“Probably about four months. The first stop is Seoul. It’ll be for two days. Then other Asian countries will follow.”

“So, does that mean I won’t be seeing you the whole time you’re on tour?”

“Why are you going to miss me?” He asked grinning.

“Uh, I’ll think about it.” I replied, laughing.  
  
He also did the same thing as he grabbed me by the arm, pulling me closer to him to tickle my side. I ended up trying to break free from him as we laughed.

“Not really, I’ll come back here once in a while.” He replied with a smile when we got back to our senses. “Aside from the fact that you’ll end up missing me, I also can’t stand being away from you that long.”  
  
I smiled at what he said but couldn’t help but feel sad at the thought of him being away most of the time for the next few months. As if we did spend most of the time together these past few months.

***  
  
By the time we reached the top, my legs were already starting to shake. No, actually they were about to give up. I was also catching my breath so hard Baekhyun ended up laughing at me.  
  
The view was great, of course. The Autumn trees from the surrounding mountains were perfect. It was as if looking at an abstract painting. It was so beautiful and refreshing at the same time. Then we started talking about the hiking place at my mother’s hometown. I turned out that he wanted to go back there soon too and I couldn’t be happier with the thought of us visiting the place again.  
  
We stayed there for a couple of hours. We were both lying on the mat we brought with us. We talked about a lot of random stuff about each other like where we went to middle and high school. He also sang a few songs for me which of course made my heart flutter and my stomach churn, all in a good way. Then all of sudden, he shifted his position that his body was now on the opposite way, leaving only our heads adjacent to each other.

“What are you doing?” I asked him in confusion.

“I was just trying to get a better position…” He replied.

“For what?”

“For this.”  
  
Then he shifted his position again, this time brought his head over mine, his elbows on either sides. He removed the locks of hair away from my face and tucked them behind my ears. I was so conscious of what he’s doing, considering the fact that his face was so close to mine. But then again, I couldn’t even tell him to stop.

I saw a cocky smile took over his mouth before planting a several small kisses on my face. First on my forehead, then my cheeks, the tip of my nose, my chin and finally on my lips. He kissed me about three times on the mouth before nibbling on my lower lip.  
  
_God, I hate him._

“Don’t you dare flirt around with other guys like the way you’re flirting with me.”

I looked at him unbelievably. Was he really the one talking to me about flirting?  
  
He kissed me on the lips one last time before laughing as he motioned to sit. I also did the same thing and faced him right away.

“Oh my god Baekhyun, you’re the one flirting with me here.” I fired.  
  
He laughed even more at my reaction.  
  
”Whatever.” He replied as he pulled me closer to kiss my shoulder.  
  
_Really, how can you be mad at him when he’s like this?_  
  
  
***  
  
5:12PM  
  
We hiked back to the house earlier than planned. We were supposed to wait for the sunset up there but we noticed how it was getting unusually cloudy. It might rain soon, so we made our way back as fast as we could hoping to get back to the house before the downpour but failed when it already started to drizzle when we were still a few meters away from the cabin.

I nearly jumped at the contact of the rain against my skin. My instinct told me that I should run so I did but I couldn’t hear him following me. I turned around to check on him and I was right. He was standing right where I left him. By this time, the rain started to pour and we were already starting to get drenched.

“What are you doing?” I asked him.  
  
He didn’t answer, he just continued to gaze at me which instantly got me more confused. I saw how he looked at me from head to toe before he closed his eyes.  
  
_Did I just see him swallow?_  
  
We were standing a few feet away from each other in the rain and it’s crazy. I didn’t have any idea as to what was going on inside his head right now. All I knew was the fact that he was sick a few days ago and he shouldn’t be getting sick again because of his tour.  
  
I ran back to him, grabbed his wrist to drag him towards the house but he didn’t budge. I turned to face him ready to question him once more but was a bit alarmed by the look on his face as of the moment. He looked pretty serious, his eyes piercing through mine, his jaw clenching. I also watched how he swallowed, his hands forming into fists.

“Baekhyun, you can’t get sick again let’s go.” I walked a few feet away from him once more. “Please.” I begged as I turned back to him, not that surprised that he still didn’t even move a muscle.

“What’s going on?” I asked once more, this time a bit impatient.

I was slowly starting to struggle to get a clear look of his profile because of the heavy raindrops blocking my vision now.  
  
“Are you okay?” My voice louder than previously.

“No.” He finally answered.  
  
My forehead creased as I threw him a puzzled look. As far as I knew, he was totally fine a while ago. I couldn’t think of any possible reason as to why he as acting this way. And I clearly didn’t get where this was all coming from. I was about to open my mouth to ask him of what was really going on when he spoke.

“I’m not okay.” He stated vehemently. “There’s no way I’m fine right now.” He added as he finally made a step towards me.  
  
I just stood there, frozen and confused as ever as I waited for him to reach my spot. My heartbeat doubled when he grabbed me by the wrist and led the way towards the house. I was following him, alarmed by how fast he was walking right now.  
  
We got to the door in no time and I watched him enter the combination the next second. When it was unlocked, we got in hastily. He let go of my hand only to get the bag off of him and threw it angrily on the floor. Then he took hold of my hand once more and led me to the stairs probably taking me to the bedroom.  
  
_Oh god._  
_I swallowed hard when it finally dawned to me._  
  
My mind seemed to have stopped working as we climbed on the stairs. I was rattling inside but I couldn’t say anything. I watched his back profile leading the way, our dripping clothes leaving wet traces on the floor. His angry and hasty footsteps filling the entire room while my hammering chest dominated my ears.  
  
I could only close my eyes and bite my lower lip when we reached the bedroom door and it slammed right after we got inside. It was the last thing I heard before he pinned me on the wall, his hands both holding my wrist up. His eyes met mine immediately and I couldn’t overlook the desire evident on them right now. My throat instantly felt dry as I held my breath.

“You really drive me crazy Park Hae Won.” His voice sounded so authoritative it made me more nervous. “It’s insane how much power you have over me.”

“Baekhyun…” I trailed off as he leaned closer, resting his head against mine, our foreheads touching.  
  
His ragged breathing reached my ears and I realized how much control he’s exerting right now. I closed my eyes and concentrated on the feel of his warm breath on my skin, the tip of his nose touching mine, his lips grazing slightly against my own.  
  
T _he level of anticipation his lips was giving me was also driving me insane. My god, Byun Baekhyun what are you doing to me?_

The moment I felt his lips on mine, all the remaining strength I had left seemed to have escaped my body. His hands let my wrist go and automatically cupped my face. My hands on the other hand fell limply on my sides, my brain unable to command them where they should be right now.

“I want you.” He said when he detached his mouth from mine and lead them towards my right ear. “All of you…” He paused as I heard him swallow. “So bad.”  
  
It was as if all forms of heat my body could produce went full force at that exact moment. I was still drenched but I couldn’t feel any form of coolness brought by the rain anymore. His hands on my skin felt so warm, it’s also driving me nuts.

“And I need you…” His raspy voice brought me back to reality as I opened my eyes and directly met his. “Right now.”  
  
He didn’t make any move while his eyes never left mine. I fully understood that he was trying to get my approval. As if in slow motion, I watched his lashes move as he blinked as few times. My attention fell on his slightly parted mouth, his chest moving due to his still ragged breathing.  
  
_I tried_ , I tried to force my rational being to come up with anything useful but all I could hear and feel was the pounding of my chest. My heart wanting to explode at the sight of him waiting for me.

  
_God, I love this man. So bad, I felt like crying right now._  
  
I slowly lifted my hands and placed them over his as they were still cupping my face. He looked a bit taken aback, probably due the tears forming in my eyes. The expression on his face softened for a split second.  
  
“It’s okay.” I muttered with every ounce of energy I have left and also nodded to assure him of my answer.  
  
_2 seconds._  
He gazed at me, unmoving for a whole two seconds before the expression on his face changed to something strong. Without wasting time, he leaned and claimed my lips once more and had absolutely become aggressive and needy. His hands left my face and instantly went to locate the hem of my sweater before taking them off of me in one swift move. His attention fell on my Maroon spaghetti strapped top for a few seconds before I felt his hand on my shoulder pulling the thin strap down my arm.  
  
I couldn’t breathe properly the whole time I was watching his every move and went to stop breathing completely when he leaned closer to kiss my neck, the sensation sending me to close my eyes right away. Then his experienced mouth went down to kiss my collarbone and my shoulder.  
  
I was so engrossed with the works of his mouth against my skin that I only just felt his hands inside my top, tracing the curves of my waist. The touch felt ticklish and tingling at the same time it sent shivers down my spine.  
  
_This was crazy. I had no other words to describe it._  
_Every little thing he was doing now was making me lose my mind._  
_Definitely making me forget everything that’s not part of any this right now._  
_I could only think of his mouth, his ragged breathing, his hands, his strong arms, his body pressed against mine. Him. And only him._  
  
I felt his teeth grazing against my jaw the next moment before tugging on my lower lip. His had on hand on my back as he unhooked something.  
  
My eyes, which were closed most of the time, flew opened. I was expecting to meet his eyes but wasn’t able to do so since he leaned closer to my ears.

“Just tell me to stop.” He said, his raspy voice just above a whisper.  
  
I took a deep breath, still unable to make any coherent thoughts in my head.  
  
“If you want me to.” He added, this time looking at me intently.  
  
I gulped.  
  
_Honestly, how could I ever tell him to stop now?_  
_Do I even want him to stop?_  
  
Without giving it much thought, I wrapped my arms around his neck as I tiptoed to kiss him firmly on the lips. And it was as if he got the signal, he lifted my legs off the floor, circling them around his waist as he took me to the bed.  
  
When my body touched the mattress, I knew right at the very moment that there was no turning back anymore. Especially when he momentarily stopped kissing me to take off his jacket, then his plain, white shirt.  
  
My heart almost skipped a beat with the minimal space between me and his toned body. I was mesmerized, there was no other way to say it. He gazed at me for a brief moment and I couldn’t help but blush at the heavy weight of his stare.

 _“I fucking….love you, Park Hae Won.”_  
  
Those were the last words I heard from him.  
  
_I wanted to tell him how much I love him too,_  
  
_I wanted to let him know that I was equally and madly in love with him too…_  
  
_but his eager lips didn’t let me anymore._  
  
  
  
My gosh, Byun Baekhyun.  


  
~♥~  
  
AN: Yes, this is my longest chapter ever and I hope this has made all the wait worth it. So, how did this crazy chapter make you feel? Feel free to tell me in the comments. You can also tell me which part is your favorite.^^  
Idk why but Baekhyun and Haewon's characters here have become so precious to me.  
  
I love you all.  

 


	27. Twenty Seven

Twenty Seven   
  
  
~♥~   
  
  


  
My eyes were still closed but I was already half awake when I felt him move closer to me. Changing his position created an _asmr-ish_ sound as he draped an arm around my back as I laid on my stomach. I could just imagine how warm and smooth his skin would be against mine if not for his shirt that I was wearing. How I ended up wearing his clothes, I couldn’t be so sure anymore. Then my mind was slowly taken over by the thoughts of everything that took place inside the four corners of this room right after we got back from the hike yesterday.  
  
My cheeks suddenly felt a warm, certain that the pink tinge was already spreading all over my face.  
  
“You seriously need to stop blushing.” His husky and sleepy voice startled me, causing me to immediately open my eyes.  
  
I expected to meet his teasing eyes but they were closed when I looked at him. Speechless, I continued to stare at him until he opened his eyes and met mine for the first time this morning.  
  
I remembered the look on his eyes yesterday when we were standing in the rain or the one he had while he waited for my permission. He gazed at me in ways I had only seen last night. How could I bring myself to stop blushing when even the mere fact of just recalling how his strong hands held me and the way his mouth showered me with kisses just absolutely made feel things. And by the way, his half naked profile next to me wasn’t helping too, his broad chest and shoulders were way too distracting for my poor eyes.  
  
 _Honestly, it was impossible._ _It was impossible to stop blushing Baekhyun._

“Or I’d start making love to you again…”  
  
 _I swallowed._  
  
I held my breath as I did nothing but look back at him. Thankfully, he’s got a soft expression on his face now and I watched how his lips curved into a smirk.

“Right away.”  
  
 _Gosh, what was he thinking trying to look and sound this hot right now?  
Though, I knew for a fact that he wasn’t even trying._  
  
I was a hundred percent sure that I wouldn’t survive if I gaze at him for another second more, so I shut my eyes closed and it wasn’t even a surprise what I thought about immediately. _Him, still him._  
  
I felt him removed his hand around me, suddenly leaving me feeling disappointed for a brief second until I felt his fingers grazing my cheek.

“Where have you been all my life?” He asked, his fingers tracing my jaw before running them down my neck.  
  
His touch was warm and icy at the same time, it’s confusing and soothing all at once and I just didn’t know what to make out of this. I ended up staring at him, unable to say anything.  
  
“And what do I have to do to wake up next to you like this every day?” He added, sounding more of a statement than a question.  
  
“Come here…” He muttered, urging me to move closer.  
  
In just a matter of seconds, I was already inside his arms. My senses instantly filled with everything about him.  
  
 _This is nice.  
Actually no, nice is an understatement._  
  
We were silent for the next few minutes, I even thought that we’re both going to fall asleep again but I happen to realize that I was starving. And it just hit me, we hadn’t really eaten anything since yesterday.  
  
“Pancakes?” I muttered unconsciously as I thought of them.  
  
“Hmm?” He murmured, with his eyes still closed.  
  
“Do you want pancakes?” I asked him, this time intentionally, as I sat up, brushing my hair away from my face.  
  
I waited for his response, looking down at him but all he did was open his eyes and stare back at me.  
  
He must be hungry too, I concluded. There was no way he wasn’t starving too. So, I got off the bed and was already on the door when I heard him.  
  
“Where do you think are you going?” He asked.  
  
He was getting off the bed and I was still processing the thought of him, half naked with gray sweatpants on, walking towards me. His hair sticking out in all directions yet still looked as handsome as ever.  
  
“And what do you think are you wearing?” He asked when he was finally next to me once more bending as he whispered on my ear.  
  
It instantly gave me the shivers. And as if it wasn’t enough, he, without a warning, scooped my legs using his arms, carrying me back to the bed.

“Baekhyun!” I exclaimed in surprise. “What are you doing?” I asked him unbelievably and embarrassed.  
  
I heard him let out of a soft laugh.  
  
“You’re so brave getting off the bed wearing my shirt thinking you’d get away this easily.” He continued, a forming smirk almost visible on his lips.  
  
As soon as he let go of me on the bed, he had his hands on either side of my head. I mustered all the courage I have to meet his eyes. I was so aware of the desire in his eyes and the playful smile on his lips made me feel more nervous.  
   
“Baekhyun…I’m hungry.” I told him, hoping I’d have the strength to convince him.  
  
He smirked and it was just so unfair how handsome he looked doing it, easily wanting me to give in.  
  
“Me too.” He replied before he dove closer to me.  
  
His lips landed on the spot right behind my right ear, the contact effortlessly making my eyes close. And right when my lips slightly parted so I could take a deep breath, his mouth found its way to mine at the exact moment. His kiss sending me crazy right away, shooting my sanity in all directions, my hands ended up crumpling the sheets.  
  
“Baek…” I uttered when he detached his lips from mine for a brief second. “I’m serious…” I trailed off as I concentrated on his lips giving my earlobe a small bite. “I’m. Really. Hungry.” I added, using every ounce of energy I have left in me.  
  
“Yeah.” He replied as I felt his hand on my stomach, delicately gazing my skin. “So, am I.” He added, planting a kiss on my chin.   
  
I knew how inappropriate my argument was in this situation but I was really hungry, I might faint anytime. _And I wasn’t even kidding._ I immediately remembered the one time he called me at one in the morning, standing and waiting for me outside Auntie’s flower shop… _hungry_. I didn’t know what to do with this information in my head right now. I wanted to smile as I recalled how he faked his passing out at that time but was nudged back to the present when I felt and heard my own stomach growling.  
  
He stopped what he was doing right away, meeting my eyes.  
 _Embarrassed,_ I only had the nerve to bite my lower lip.  
  
He chuckled as he climbed off me and laid on the bed right next to me.  
  
“I must have really starved you.”  
  
“I told you I was so hungry.” I replied in a matter of fact tone.  
  
He let out of a small laugh as he brought my entire body on top of him, my hair instantly falling on one side. The minimal distance between our faces and the way he was gazing at me, giave me the butterflies.  
  
“Pancakes it is but…” He trailed off, the corners of his lips turning up letting me know that he was thinking of something silly again. “We’ll finish where we left off right after.”  
  
“Okay, Baekhyun.”  
  
 _How he got me to agree that easily, wasn’t a surprise after all._  
I was really hungry I’d have to agree.  
  
As soon as we were on our feet, I made my way to the door. However, I was only about three steps away from him when I heard him sigh, making me turn to him. He got his hands on his waist, a frustrated look on his face.  
  
“For heaven’s sake baby, cover your legs.” He grumbled. “I would love to eat pancakes but I just might change my mind if you walk around the house looking like that.”  
  
I looked down to check the hem of his black shirt falling mid-thigh. I guess his broad chest wasn’t the only thing that was being distracting right now.  
  
“Okay.” I agreed. “But do you mind putting a shirt on too?” I told him. “You’re also VERY DISTRACTING Byun Baekhyun. You and your…” I trailed off as my attention fell on his chest.  
  
He followed my eyes and I saw how a cocky smile made an appearance.  
  
We held each other’s gaze for a couple of seconds before we burst out laughing at the same time.  
  
 _I was fully convinced of how crazy the two of us were._  
  
***  
  
We were on the kitchen. He was now wearing a plain, navy blue shirt on top of his grey sweatpants while I still wear his black shirt but with jeans now.  
  
I was in front of the stove, busy making the pancakes while he sat on the chair next to the counter, his eyes following my every move. Of course, I still get conscious around him but I was also so determined to finish this so we could eat.  
  
From time to time, he’d pull me closer to him just like what he did just right now.  
  
“Baekhyun, I’m not going to get this done if you keep doing this.” I scolded him, making the hand I was using to hold the pancake turner as far as possible.  
  
“What am I doing exactly?” He asked innocently, leaning his head on my shoulder.  

“Uh, flirting with me?”  
  
He let out a soft laugh, his hands never leaving my waist.  
  
“It’s not my fault you’re so irresistible.” He reasoned out.  
  
I hit him with my free hand before I broke free from him so I could go back to what I was doing. I stood in front of the stove once more, flipping the pancakes over on the pan when I felt his hand shoving my hair to one side before I felt his warm lips on my neck.  
  
 _My gosh, I swear this man._ He’s suddenly extra clingy and my poor heart was about to explode any time.  
If he only knew how much control I was exerting from holding on to my sanity so I could finish what I was doing.  
  
“Baek…please stop.” I protested.  
  
However, instead of listening to me, he made me turn around so I could face him. He even took the turner from my hand and laid it on the counter. And right before I could even start scolding him again, he made sure I could not make any sound by claiming my lips.  
  
 _God, I hate him._  
  
I hate how his lips could easily convince me to kiss him back as well as the fact that he just completely taken my mind off the pancakes as I wound my hands around his neck in surrender. And when I did this, he took my legs and circled them around his waist before he took me away from the stove and brought me to the counter. He made me sit, making sure not to break the kiss. As our lips were busy entangling with each other, I felt his hands on my back as he made me lie down.  
  
I would normally panic in a situation like this but for some unexplainable reasons, I was at ease. It felt totally fine lying on the counter right now being all over each other. My hands, having a mind of their own, went to his head, my fingers tugging on his hair.  
  
I was getting breathless, even held my breath a few times when he grazed his hand along my leg. His lips left mine and proceeded to my neck, my mouth slightly parted at the contact. I was sure I was about to drown at how good he was making me feel when...  
  
 _he stopped._  
  
I even felt him get up, causing me to open my eyes to check what was going on. I at least expected to catch him staring at me but proved me wrong when he wasn’t.

He was in front of the stove and I was a hundred percent certain that he was checking on the pancakes.  
  
 _Was he serious?_  
  
I sighed and I was surprised at how frustrated I seemed to feel. My body felt so bare, lying on the counter when he was now concentrating on the pancakes. I was embarrassed, heat slowly taking over my face. I slowly sat up, fixed my hair and pulled the shirt I was wearing down.  
  
“I never expected you…” I trailed off when he glanced at me, absolutely not knowing what to make out of the look on his face. “To care about the pancakes that much.” I finished my statement, though I didn’t really think it was necessary.  
  
He chuckled as he turned to me once again, a cocky smile on his lips before moving his head sideways.

After a few seconds, he was already placing the pancakes on the plate next to me, because obviously, I was still sitting on the counter.  
  
“You don’t know how hard I had to convince myself to save your pancakes from burning.” He said in a matter of fact tone.  
  
I looked at him, wonder probably written all over my face.  
  
“I mean, you said you’re starving and…” He paused as I saw the corners of his lips turning up. “I don’t want you to pass out on me while…you know, while we’re…”  
  
He was obviously teasing me right now and I hate myself for instantly blushing at his silliness. I wanted to respond by hitting him but he would end up teasing me more so I decided to shrug it off this time. As a matter of fact, I got distracted by the smell of the fresh pancakes, so I immediately got off the counter and sat on the high stool.  
  
I heard him smirk right when I took hold of the fork and took a bite.  
  
“I must have really starved you…” He said grinning before he turned away to get a glass of water and placed it next to the plate.  
  
I watched him sit on the stool next me. However, instead of facing the counter, he was facing me. I was about to ask him if he was going to eat but he suddenly reached for my chair, made me face him before pulling the chair closer to him until my legs were pinned between his.  
  
I stopped eating as I focus my attention on him.  
  
“Eat a lot, baby.” He stated with a subtle but crazy curve on his lips before winking.  
  
 _Gosh, this man and his thoughts._  
  
I looked away, of course trying to hide the pink tinge on my cheeks. I took another slice and was about to eat it when he suddenly grabbed my hand, stopping me from bringing the food to my mouth. I threw him a puzzled look as I waited for him to make me understand what he was trying to do. Then he let go of my hand and opened his mouth.  
  
 _He was asking me to feed him_ and I didn’t know how to fully process this right now. He looked so cute and soft with his mouth opened, waiting for me.  
  
Though a bit shy at first, I took the food to his mouth and he started to chew immediately. In fact it happened a lot of times until we finished all three pieces.  
  
I immediately got up to take the plate to the sink so I could wash them. I turned the facet on and just when the water started to run, I felt his hand on my wrist causing me to instantly shoot him a surprised look. Then he made me face him and pinned my body between his and the sink, his hand still holding my wrist as we both as he bore his eyes into mine.  
  
“Just leave the damn dishes alone.” He told me and there was absolute impatience in his tone.

_That specific look on his eyes, again._  
  
I couldn’t utter any word, of course. How could I when I absolutely felt like melting under his gaze right now?  
  
“They don’t need you as much as I do.”  
  
I shivered at his low and slightly raspy voice. And seeing his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed didn’t really help. My free hand tightly gripped on the corner of the sink like my life depended on them or something.  
  
When he finally made a move to get me out of the kitchen, I thankfully was able to reach for the faucet to turn it off.  
  
We were halfway through the living room heading towards the stairs when he suddenly stopped walking, turned to me and without any word, walked me towards the fireplace instead. He let go of my hand as soon as we got there. He proceeded and took the comforter we used the other night and spread it on the floor.  
  
From where I was standing, I could already feel the warmth emanating from the fireplace nearby though I wasn’t really sure if it wasn’t coming from my cheeks instead. I saw him extend a hand towards me, obviously inviting me to join him.

I took his hand and in just a matter of seconds, we were already crossed sitting face to face. He was staring at me intently as if memorizing every detail of my face and I just had to do the same thing. I concentrated on what seemed to be my favourite part of his face, the mole on the corner of his upper lip. That spot looked so soft and it always made me remember his soft sides which of course melts my heart every time.  
  
Then the corners of his lip curved upwards making way to cocky smile.  
  
“You wanna kiss me that bad, huh?” I heard him say.  
  
I blinked a few times because of what he just said.  
  
“What are you talking about?” I reasoned out as I looked away for a moment.  
  
His soft laugh reached my ears and I was still trying to think of a better reply when I felt him grabbed me by the arm. It was so sudden that I wasn’t able to prepare for it. He now had his back leaned on the floor while I end up on top of him, my legs right above his own. I had my hands on his arms for support, my hair falling to one side, the strands touching his face. We were gazing at each other until he opened his mouth to speak.  
  
“Go ahead, kiss me.” He told me, a subtle smile ended his statement.  
  
I didn’t move a muscle, even froze because I wasn’t really sure whether to obey him or pretend that he was wrong when he said that I wanted to kiss him. My heart started to pound as he obviously waited for me to make a move.  
  
As I took my time contemplating, I felt him circle his hands around my waist as he pulled my body closer to his. I was a bit flustered as my heart almost skipped a beat when my hands slipped from his arms to the floor, taking my face even closer to his.  
  
The debate whether to really kiss him or not resumed in my head and I was getting so confused. Then I noticed that he looked like he was ready to tease me once more, so without giving him the opportunity to do, I brought my hands to cup his face as I leaned closer to initiate the kiss.  
  
My cheeks felt like they were a pair of volcanoes ready to erupt any moment from now by the way they felt so hot. His lips only remained steady for a brief second as I brushed my lips against them before he started to gently kiss me back.  
  
I was so aware that I was the one on top of him right now, the one kissing him and I had all the reasons to feel shy about this but I forced my mind to concentrate on his satin like lips tugging on my lower lip right now, I became more relaxed.  
  
 _Actually no._  
  
 _Relaxed_ wasn’t the best word to describe how I started to feel. I could feel something building up inside me and I wanted him to hold me like the way he held me last night. And when his grip tightened on the curve of my waist and his lips became more intruding, I couldn’t help but let my guard down. The kiss went deeper, our heads titling, adjusting with each other’s.  
  
I didn’t know what was going on inside my head anymore. My attention was torn between his lips and his hands exploring the inside my shirt. The warmth of his palms making me feel somewhat intoxicated. Then I felt him move as he swiftly got up to sit, his hands draped around me. And it amazed me just how his lips never left mine for a second leaving me almost catching my breath already. My entire body started to feel weak feeling defenceless, like my life depended on his him.  
  
I needed air and was left pulling my mouth away from his as I tilt my head to the right so I could take a deep breath. With my cheek touching his, my mouth slightly parted seemingly desperate for air. I felt his hand on my neck, his fingers tracing my jaw and I liked as how hot his skin felt against my own.  
  
“I knew it.” His raspy voice intruded my thoughts.  
  
I leaned away, looked at him with furrowed eyebrows.  
  
“You’ve been dying to do this too.” He added with a crazy attractive lopsided smile.  
  
“Shut up Baekhyun.” I replied as I hit him on the shoulder.  
  
“Yes ma’am.” He chuckled.  
  
What he did next wasn’t that unexpected but still left me biting my lower lip. He leaned away a bit to take off his shirt. There was no denying that his perfectly toned chest caught my attention right away. I could feel myself blushing again at any moment because the truth was I won’t be able to get used to seeing him like this.  
  
He planted a kiss right below my left ear as I sensed him trying to take off my clothes. I held my breath for a second but didn’t protest until he finally took off my shirt leaving me with my lacy, black bra and jeans on. He managed to meet my eyes for a brief moment, his eyes filled with that familiar desire, before he leaned closer to kiss my neck down to my collarbones and before he could move further down, he stopped what he was doing to look at me.  
  
I swear right at that very second, the warmth emanating from the fireplace couldn’t compare to the heat I was feeling right from our bodies as our skin brushed against each other’s.  
  
He slowly got me to lie on my back and gazed at me for a couple of seconds.  
  
“You’re the most beautiful woman I ever laid eyes on.” His voice obviously filled with affection, a hand brushing the hair stands off my face.  
  
My heart though pounding, felt so warm.

“Thank God you’re mine.”  
  
I could only gaze at him, mesmerized by how handsome he looked from my point of view. His hair falling down right above his eyes, pinning me between his strong arms. I watched him wet his lips and realizing how attractive he looked every time he did that.

I unconsciously, or maybe not really, brought my hands to his face.  
  
“Do you have any idea how much I love you?” He asked, his voice mixed with the right amount of gentleness and huskiness, just above a whisper.  
  
Suddenly feeling so emotional, I felt tears forming in my eyes.  
   
“Yes Baekhyun, I do.” I answered, as my finger played with his hair.  
  
He tilted his head, closed his eyes as he kissed the palm of my hand.  
  
I was so sure we we’re both feeling soft until he leaned closer to me, his mouth an inch right above mine.  
  
“Now get me to shut up, Miss Park will you?”  
  
I was a bit hesitant like I always had but I brought a hand to his nape to pull his head closer until his lips collided with mine. I closed my eyes but didn’t fail to feel his smile against my mouth.    
  
His mouth became aggressive in a matter of seconds and I just couldn’t concentrate on kissing him back especially when I felt his fingers grazing down my stomach and stopping when he reached the waistband of my pants, unbuttoning it flawlessly. His lips left my mouth landing on my stomach where he started to plant small kisses, instantly sending shivers down my spine.  
  
 _I gulped, my eyes flew opened, meeting the ceiling straightaway._  
  
***  
  
We were back in the bedroom getting ready to leave. I just finished blow drying my hair while he was packing his things on the bed. I walked towards the full length mirror to check my appearance. I was wearing an old rose spaghetti strapped, knee length dress paired with a loose, plain white shirt inner and white sneakers.  
  
I just love how his cousin seemed to know the clothes that I like. Her wardrobe choices for me went from being classy to casual and I couldn’t ask for anything more.  
  
I decided to tie my hair up in a loose ponytail and was in the process of doing so when he suddenly appeared next to me. His hands automatically draped around my waist as he back hugged me.  
  
“Will you stop being so pretty?” He said gently.  
  
I almost laughed at his statement as I watched him rest his head on my shoulder. He was wearing a beige sweater with a Supreme print on it and it felt absolutely soft, paired with jeans and sneakers.  
  
 _It’s so unreal._ Still unreal to me to think that he’s the same man the whole country _loves and adores._  
  
“Can we not leave…” He muttered as he tilt his head up, looking on the mirror to meet my eyes, his chin still resting on my shoulder. “Just yet?”  
  
I felt sad and soft as I leaned my head against his. If he only knew how much I wished we could just stay here longer but then again that would just be wistful thinking. He had to go back because he had a whole tour ahead of him. He needed to go back to being the famous Byun Baekhyun.  
  
“We both know we have to leave Baek.” I stated with a sad smile.  
  
He didn’t say anything as he tightened his hug around me before he let go and went back to the bed. I followed him with my eyes as I remained in front of the mirror. I could sense his sadness by the way his shoulders slumped.  
  
He took his bag off the bed to the floor next to his feet. His head tilted down as his attention was fixed on the floor.  
  
I walked back to where he was and sat right next to him. We didn’t talk, we just sat there in silence. He placed a hand over mine, his fingers caressing my skin.  
  
I just love it. I just love how even the silence between us was so soothing. I guess it didn’t really matter what we’re doing as long as I had him next to me, I’d be contented.  
  
About a couple of minutes later, he leaned away and eventually laid on his back. I felt him tug my hand, urging me to do the same so I did. We were both staring at the ceiling as we listened the audible rustle coming from the leaves of the trees outside.  
  


I closed my eyes, savouring the serenity of the moment when I felt him get up. I immediately opened my eyes to check what he was doing and to my confusion, I saw him attempting to wrap the comforter around me.  
  
“What are you do-” My question got cut when he rolled my body along with the blanket.  
  
After rolling me for about three times, I was all wrapped like a burrito.  
  
“Now…you can’t go anywhere.” He said, laughing.  
  
He’s probably making fun of how crazy I looked right now. I tried to move and break free but it was so tight.  
  
“Baekhyun! Get this off me.” I demanded right away.  
  
He continued to smile at me, looking determined to keep me in this state. Then he went back to lie next to me once more and placed an arm and a leg over my body. His weight made it even harder for me.  
  
“Let’s stay like this for a few minutes.” He told me as he planted a kiss on my cheek.  
  
I saw how he closed his eyes and he suddenly looked peaceful. I didn’t want to interrupt his peace but it’s already getting harder to breathe.  
  
“Baek…in a few minutes I’m pretty sure I’d be dead.”  
  
I told him in a very serious tone but ironically it sent him laughing.  
  
He sat up, with a huge smile on his face before _unwrapping_ me. I immediately took a deep breath the moment I was freed. He was looking down at me and it was obvious that he was trying to stifle another laugh.  
  
“I’m sorry Baby, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He muttered as he leaned down to plant a couple of kisses on the tip of my nose before giving my mouth a peck.  
  
I was certain that he was half apologizing and half making fun of me because, I could feel his smile as he kissed me repeatedly on the mouth.  
  
I brought a hand to squeeze his right ear.  
  
“Aaahhh!” He yelled.

I continued to hold on to his ear and he was forced to stop kissing my mouth.  
  
“You’re sorry but you keep smiling…” I whined, glaring at him, finally letting go of his ear.  
  
“I’m sorry. You looked so cute all wrapped like that.” He reasoned out while he rubbed his ear. “Is my ear bleeding?” He asked leaning forward and tilted his head sideways so I could check his ear.

I wasn’t really mad at him but it was just so obvious that he liked making fun of me. However, his overly dramatic reaction about his ear made me smile right away.  
  
“I hate you.” I said trying to hide my amusement as he faced me.  
  
“What did you just say?” He asked.  
  
“I said, I hate you.” I repeated, trying my hardest to sound serious.  
  
“Oh really?”  
  
His face suddenly lit up as he leaned down and started to tickle my sides.  
  
“Baek….stooooooooop!” I struggled to say since he wouldn’t stop tickling me.

“What? Sorry, I can’t hear you baby.” He replied, grinning as he continued.  
  
“Oh my….. no! Baek…hyun, stop….enough…..that’s enough…..please!” I shrieked between my laughter as I plead him to stop.  
  
 _Thankfully, he did._  
  
I was out of breath when he finally stopped tickling me. I immediately got up and moved away from him, scared that he’d start doing it again. But then I barely stepped away from him when he caught me by the wrist and pulled me to sit on his lap.  
  
“I’m not ready to leave yet.” He said in a low spirited voice.  
  
I draped an arm around his neck and he proceeded to bury his face against my neck.  
  
“Me too.” I replied, couldn’t help but be honest.  
  
He met my eyes, he wasn’t smiling this time. In fact, he looked a bit sad. I was about to tell him that it’s okay but his phone beeped. I removed my hand off him so he could move freely. I waited for him to reach for his phone, which was on the bedside table but he didn’t.  
  
“Aren’t you going to check it?” I asked him. “It might be important.”  
  
He moved his head sideways before tilting his head down to kiss my shoulder.  
  
“Few more minutes.” He stated.  
  
He smiled subtly as he locked eyes with me.  
  
“I need a few more uninterrupted minutes with you.” He added.  
  
He wrapped his arms around me tightly as if never wanting to let me go. It made me feel so soft and sad too. I listened and concentrated on his breathing as we remained silent for  
  
 _the next few minutes._  
  
  


***  
  
We left at around three in the afternoon.

We have been driving for about an hour now but I could still remember how sad I felt when I glanced at the cabin house for the last time. In just a matter of couple of days, it had become so special to me and leaving was just so disheartening. Baekhyun might have noticed how I felt so he told me that he’d find a way for us to go back someday. I just smiled at him because I knew for a fact that he was kind of feeling the same way too.  
  
Knowing the nature of his career, the past couple of days of us being alone together was almost a miracle. And thinking how busy he was going to be in the coming days would nearly make it impossible to us to spend a long time together. He’d be in and out of the country and no matter how much I tried to tell myself that it’s okay, I couldn’t help but worry.  
  
I looked at him while he was focused on driving. He’s got one hand on the wheel and the other on his lap. I suddenly felt the need to feel him so I turned to face him, stretched an arm to reach for his free hand. I held it with my both hands and it caused him to look at me dearly.  
  
This separation anxiety I get every time we had to part ways just kills me.  
  
He smiled at me, a soft expression on his face.  
  
“I’ll miss you too.” He said gently, he tore his attention on the road to briefly meet my eyes and bring my hand to his mouth to kiss it.  
  
I couldn’t say anything.  
 _I chose not to because I already kind of felt like crying._  
  
***  
  
It was almost twilight by the time we got to the city. He stopped his car in front of a café when I asked him if we could drop by so I could go out and buy him coffee since he absolutely looked tired and sleepy from driving.  
  
I roamed my attention around and the number of people around the place got me a bit worried. He asked me to wear his denim jacket which was absolutely big for me and also made me wear his black bucket hat, worried that I might get cold or something.  
  
“Come back.” He said, reaching for my hand.  
  
I smiled at him.  
  
“Baek, I’m just gonna be there.” I said pointing at the café. “It won’t take long.”  
  
He chuckled as he let go of my hand.  
  
The chilly city wind welcomed me as soon as I stepped out of his car, grateful enough that I was wearing his jacket. I walked to the café with nothing but my wallet since my hand would be full after ordering.  
  
There were a lot of people inside the café and there was a line of four people at the counter. I momentarily glanced back at his car outside before I turn my attention on the list on the wall mounted menu.  
  
When there was only one person left before my turn, I heard a couple of female voices talking.  
  
“Hey!” She exclaimed. “Isn’t that Baekhyun’s car?!” She added, her high pitched voice so loud it caught several attention inside the café.  
  
My heart started to beat crazy as I turn around to check on them. I saw her pointing at his black car right outside the café. She was with three of her friends on the table.  
  
“Are you sure?” One of her friend asked.  
  
“Yes, I’m sure.” She said as she navigated on her phone and showed it to them afterwards. “Here, see… it’s his car.”  
  
“But what could he be doing here?” The other friend asked before they started to roam their attention around.  
  
Scared that they might suspect me, I immediately turned away just in time for the cashier to take my order. The staff had to ask me a couple of times of my order because I was too rattled inside so I struggled to get with my order. And When I finally finished giving my order, I stepped aside to give way to the next customer.  
  
“He must be with someone.”  
  
“Yeah, he could be waiting for someone but who could it be?”

I was certain that they were still looking for someone who he could be with, so I ended up pulling the hat down to my face.  
  
A couple of minutes later, I had my order on my hand. I started to make my way out but stopped when the realization that I couldn’t just walk towards his car since there were people who knew that it was his.  
  
 _Oh god, Baekhyun please don’t do anything. Don’t let them see you._

I was praying so hard but then froze when the very thing I was hoping he wouldn’t do was happening before my eyes. He rolled the window of the passenger’s seat down.  
  
Then I heard another voice, almost giving me a heart attack.    
  
“Oh it’s Baekhyun!” It was a different voice this time, it belonged to a teenager who was with her two friends who were sitting right next to the tempered glass.  
  
He wasn’t wearing anything to cover his face so I was pretty sure the teenagers recognized him. He must have seen the expression on their faces that he hurriedly closed the window.  
  
 _Oh god, oh god._  
  
I panicked and I swear it doubled when I saw several people including the two group of girls who were talking about him rushed out of the café. The stood next to his car with their phones on their hands either recording or taking photos.  
  
I couldn’t move.  
  
 _This could not be happening right now._  
  
I didn’t know as to how long I spaced out, just standing there watching how the situation also stirred curiosity from the other customers even the passers-by on the streets.  
  
 _What do I do? What do I do?_  
  
I didn’t have my phone with me so I couldn’t even tell him to just leave. Since there were not a lot of people left inside the café left, I walked towards the tempered glass wall, hoping he was looking at me behind the tinted windows of his car.  
  
I subtly signalled him to leave.  
There was no way we’d get out of this place together so he needed to leave without me.  
  
After about thirty seconds of trying to signal him to go, his car started to move causing relief to immediately take over me. I sat on the chair next to the vacant table not knowing what to do next.  
  
 _Now, how do I go home?  
Where and what is this place called?_  
 _But where do I go from here?  
Is it safe to go to his house right now?_  
  
My train of thoughts was cut when the people who went out to check on him a while ago came back to their tables. The next moment I knew, their comments filled my ears.  
  
 _“He looked so handsome!”  
“Yes! I can’t believe we saw him today.”  
“But who was he really with? He can’t just randomly park his car right outside the café right?”  
“Yeah, that’s weird. He must be waiting for someone.”  
“I was actually expecting to see Ara here a while ago.”  
“Why would you think of that?”  
“Didn’t you hear about the rumours that he and Ara might be together again?”  
“And have you seen Ara’s latest Instagram post? It was a necklace with a B pendant.”  
“They said it was a throwback photo. The necklace must be from Baekhyun.”  
“Of course, who else could it be from? And what else could it mean? The post was definitely about Baekhyun.”  
“But what about the photos of him with a woman last time?”  
“You know what I think that was just his cousin.”  
“What? No. If you saw the pictures and looked at it carefully you could tell that she wasn’t a relative.”  
“So what could the issue about Ara be?”  
“I don’t know but I really like him with Ara.”  
“Ara is the perfect girl for Baekhyun.”_  
  
My heart ached.  
That’s for sure.  
And I knew I had to do everything I could not to let their words get to me again.  
  
 _Baekhyun and I were so happy the last couple of days, this is scaring me._  
  
***  
  
The dusk had finally fallen.  
  
It’s been more than an hour and the groups of women and teenagers who talked nonstop about Baekhyun and Ara already left and the café was not that packed anymore. I ended up finishing the one of the two coffee I ordered a while ago.  
  
I wasn’t really sure why didn’t I leave yet. For some reasons, it seemed like the right thing to do. Maybe he’d come back.  
  
 _But could he really come back here after what happened?  
No, of course he couldn’t. _  
  
It all dawned to me, he wouldn’t come back so I’d better leave now. I checked on the remaining coffee and realized that it had already gone cold so I decided to leave it behind. I went out of the café but stopped when I was right standing next to the tempered glass wall.  
  
 _Where do I go?  
Should I just go home?_  
  
I was busy contemplating on these thoughts when I heard someone call me.  
  
“Park Hae Won.”  
  
It was a familiar voice, I knew it was.  
But it definitely was not Baekhyun’s.  
It was owned but someone who knew him.  
  
I turned around to check the owner of the voice.  
  
  
 _Manager Kang._  
  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
  
  
AN: Thank you for waiting loves. I hope you like this update. ^^ feel free to tell me what you think about it in the comments. ~~  
For the typos, I'm pretty sure there are because I'm so sleepy now, I get back on them some other time.   
  
Thanks for the new subs and upvote! I sure do appreciate them. ♥


	28. Twenty Eight

  
~♥~

_“Park Hae Won.”_

I froze for about a couple of seconds before I was able to get myself to turn around and look at him. As expected, I could only stare at him. He seemed intimidating wearing a navy blue bomber jacket over a black inner, jeans and sneakers. I mean yes, he was wearing casual clothes but he’s somehow got an authoritative aura. I guess a manager should.

My throat suddenly felt dry, not knowing whether to introduce myself or something since he just called me by my complete name.

“Old rose dress, denim jacket that’s quite big for her, black bucket hat...and…” He trailed off as he looked at me intently. “Beautiful.”

“What?” I muttered, surprised by his word.

“He pretty much remembered every detail about you perfectly.” He answered which still left me a bit confused. “He said I should look for someone wearing like what you’re exactly wearing and insisted that you’re  _beautiful_. So, I guessing you’re Park Hae Won.”

I nodded as I continued to look at him, still a bit taken aback by his presence. Then he smiled subtly and it came like a shower of relief to me. At least he didn’t appear and looked angry at me or something.

“I’m Kang Hyun Seok.” He introduced as he offered a hand which I hesitantly took. “Baekhyun’s Manager.” His voice suddenly went low in volume as he mentioned his name.

After shaking his hand for a brief moment, I took a deep breath and mustered every ounce of courage I ask to speak in front of Baekhyun’s manager.

“W-where is he?”

He didn’t reply but looked around instead.

“I guess I’ll tell you about it in the car.” He stated as he pointed at the car parked a few feet away from us.

He led the way but I was too reluctant to follow him. I saw him glanced back and stopped on his feet when he found out that I didn’t move. He came back and stopped in front of me once more.

“I’m sorry I just don’t…” I trailed off as I didn’t want to sound rude trying to tell him that I don’t trust anyone but Baekhyun.

“Trust me?” He told me, finishing my statement.

_I guess, I was that obvious again._

“Honestly, I don’t really know what to tell you exactly for you to believe me but I’m pretty sure he’s going to kill me if something bad happens to you Hae Won.” He informed. “I promise I’ll give the answer to your question in the car.” He added.

When I still didn’t move, he proceeded to take his phone out and called someone before handing the phone to me.

“Baby.” The person on the other line said and I was sure the voice belonged to Baekhyun. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t come back for you. Please go with Manager Kang for now. I promise I’ll come meet you as soon as possible.”

***

When we got in the car, Manager Kang immediately revved the engine on and it instantly got me worried. I panicked a bit, my mind rattled at the thought of where’s he was going to take me. But then again, Baekhyun trusted him so I better do the same thing.

“He said he couldn’t take you home so I’m going to drive you to a hotel where you can spend the night.” He told me right away.

_Okay Park Hae Won. Calm down. I convinced myself._

“Is he okay?”

“He’s fine. He was summoned to the company.” He said, momentarily taking his attention off the road to look at me. “Actually I have been trying to get him to go there since this morning but I’m guessing he was still with you?”

“Yeah.” I uttered, not a hundred percent sure if it was the right thing to do.

“When I finally got a call, the first thing he did was tell me the address of the café, described you and asked me to come and get you…” He paused as he turned right. “Of course I told him that I couldn’t do it since I have to go with him to the company as soon as possible, and you know what he told me?”

I didn’t say anything but waited for his next words.

“He said, there’s no way he’s going to show up in the company without knowing you’re safe. He even said that if I don’t do it, he’ll do it himself…but we both know it’ll be risky since he also mentioned that some people recognized him.”

***

7:45PM

We arrived at a very fancy hotel. We were in the lobby and Manager Kang was talking to the receptionist while I roam my attention around the place. It was just like the one Lizzie and I had when we were in Seoul the last time. There were not really a lot of people inside, only a few ones and they looked as fancy as the hotel.

I intended to talk to Manager Kang and tell him to go to another place less fancier but when I turned to him, he signalled me to go since it seemed like he was already done booking a room for me. I hesitated but I guess I didn’t have any choice.

I followed him until we got in the elevator. He pressed 38 and it must be where my room was, of course.  
It was really awkward being alone with Baekhyun’s manager so I was thankful when about three people joined us on the 21st floor.

When we reached the 38th floor, he led me to the seventh door on the left. He opened the door for me and I was instantly welcomed by a very expensive looking room. It was spacious and had a very pretty living room. There was also a fascinating tempered glass wall which allowed me to see the beautiful city lights of Seoul.

“I guess this is a bit too much for me Manager Kang.” I finally told him. “I’m fine with a less expensive place.”

He smiled and I noticed how comforting it was. This was probably why Baekhyun referred to his as an older brother. His aura felt like one.

“Baekhyun made it clear to give you the best. I don’t want him nagging me later for doing otherwise.” He told me, shrugging his shoulders. “I also already ordered your dinner so they’ll probably serve it anytime.”

“Thanks.”

“Oh by the way, here.” He said handing me a white paper bag. “He said to get you these.”

I hesitated before opening the bag and found a pair of powder blue, silk pajamas.

“Oh gosh, he should really stop making other people buy clothes for me.” I said, my cheeks heating in the process. “This is so embarrassing.”

I heard him laugh.

“That man loves hard. You’re in good hands Hae Won.”  
I surely didn’t know how to respond to that so I just smiled at him.

He didn’t stay much long telling me that he need to go to the company and join Baekhyun.

“It’s nice to meet you Hae Won.”

I didn’t really know it was a good thing.

“I’m sorry if I caused you trouble.”

“No. It’s fine. I can clearly see why Baekhyun is willing to fight everyone for you.” He said, ending his statement with a smile before finally leaving.

***

1:36AM

I didn’t know how long had I been asleep already when I heard knocks coming from the door. I checked the clock and it said 1:36 in the morning.

_Who could it be?_  
Manager Kang?  
Baekhyun?

My heart almost leaped at the thought of Baekhyun coming over but he’d probably be so tired from meetings and rehearsals. I walked towards the door and right before I unlocked the door, I peeked through the peephole and almost held my breath who it was.

_Baekhyun._

When I opened the door for him, he welcomed me with a gentle smile on his face. He was wearing a black padded jacket and a black cap. He had a paper bag with him which I believed must be my things from his car.

“Hey Baby.” He greeted before stepping inside.

He grabbed my hand right after I locked the door. He left the paper bag on the couch and walked towards the bedroom. He sat on the edge of the bed as he took off his jacket and his shoes before pulling me closer until I was standing between his legs, his arms around me, hugging me with his head right against my stomach.

“What are you doing here Baek?” I asked him. “How did you come here? Is it safe for you to be here? Are you sure no one recognized you on your way up here?” I added, aware that I was interrogating him.

I felt him chuckled.

“I miss you.” It was all he said, his embrace tightening around me. “That’s why.”

I bit my lower lip as I struggled to formulate another question after his heart warming response.

“Uhm…are you hungry?”

He moved his head sideways.

“I just miss you. That’s all.” He said, looking up to meet my eyes.

He pouted and blinked his eyes a couple of times. My lips curved, evidently pleased and falling for his antics. But then despite his overflowing cuteness right now, I couldn’t help but notice how tired he seemed to be. His eyes were a bit droopy and his voice was so gentle. Not to mention, it’s already past one in the morning.

“You must be tired. Did you come from rehearsals?”

His response came in the form of a nod.

I brought my hands to cup his face and I watched how he closed his eyes.

“Oh, my poor  _baby_.” I blurted out, totally unaware of the endearment coming out of my own mouth.

His eyes flew opened, surprised.

“Did you just call me…baby?” He asked with a hit of teasing in his tone.

_I gulped. Speechless. Well, that was a first._ My cheeks started heating and became too conscious of the way he’s staring at me right now. And that subtle smile on his beautiful lips was breath-taking.  _Oh god._

“You did.” His smile went wider. “You just called me  _baby_.” He added cockily. “You should do it more often. In fact, you can also call me  _daddy_ if you want-”  
  
“Baekhyun!”

I unconsciously hit him on the arm, cutting his statement before he laughed aloud.

“What? I’m just saying…” He replied, throwing me an incredulous look as he pulled me to sit on his leg.

We remained looking at each other for a few seconds before he opened his mouth to speak once more.

“I’m really sorry about this afternoon. I should’ve have come back for you.” He apologized as he leaned his head on my shoulder.

“It’s fine Baek.” I replied reaching for his free hand. “There was no way you’d be able to come back without people recognizing you again.” I added with a reassuring smile.

He titled his head up to face me once more.

“I told you to stop making me fall in love with you more, didn’t I?” His response was totally unexpected.

I opened my mouth to say something but none came out as I was still trying to process what he just said. Then he chuckled, brought his hands to my head, tilting it closer to his before planting a quick kiss on my lips.

“I’m just kidding. Go on. Keep doing it.” He stated, grinning. “I really don’t mind falling in love with you over and over again.”

“Crazy.” I muttered unable to hide my amusement.

After a few minutes of just sitting silently, he yawned. He was obviously sleepy now and I was too.

“I just want to sleep next to you.” He said, his voice just above a whisper.

I smiled at him before standing on my feet so he could climb on the bed.

_Oh gosh, soft hours here we go._

He immediately closed his eyes the second his back touched the bed giving me the luxury to watch him the next few moments. Then he opened his eyes and immediately met mine, a look of wonder on his face probably because I was still on the same spot. He didn’t say anything but lifted his arms as if asking for a hug.

“Come here.” He told me with the gentlest voice ever.

I couldn’t help but smile at how soft he looked at the very moment. He was wearing a plain black shirt and jeans, white socks. He looked so handsome in his disheveled hair and his sleepy voice was just irresistible.

I managed to turn off the lights, only leaving the bedside lamp on before joining him on the bed. And as soon as I was beside him, I felt him draped an arm over my waist before pulling me closer until his breathing was already audible to my ear.

His warmth, which I happen to confirm a lot of times to be one of my favourite things in the world, was totally comforting. I was undeniably delighted that he came over and he’s right next to me now.

“Baek?” I uttered, my attention on his closed eyes.

“Hmmm…” He murmured.

“Thanks for coming over.”

He responded by planting a light kiss between my eyes.

It was dark inside the room but I could somehow see his profile due to the dim light coming from the bedside lamp. I stared at him to my heart’s content and I couldn’t help but smile as I also listened to his steady breathing.  _I love watching him sleep_. I loved how he’s able to take a rest like this. He looked peaceful.

“I went home.” He uttered, out of nowhere without opening his eyes. “But it was lonely.” He added, gently rubbing my back with his hand. “I couldn’t shake the thought of you being alone somewhere too, so I decided to come over.”

_He’s so sweet._  I was pretty sure I was blushing, thankfully he wouldn’t be able to see it.

“You should also stop making me fall in love with you more too, you know.” I said, trying my best to copy how he said it a while ago.

He let out of a soft laugh and I did too before I moved closer, snuggling against him, my head on his chest.

“Sleep now baby, I love you.” He murmured as he kissed me on the head.

“Love you.”

“Goodnight, princess.”

_Princess?_  
Did he just call me princess?

_Yes, he did._

***

I wasn’t sure how long it had been or how short of a period of time we had slept when I felt him move beside me. I sensed that he was about to leave so I placed an arm over him, wanting to stop him.

“You’re leaving already?” I managed to ask in a very sleepy voice, eyes still closed.

He placed a hand over my arm, his fingers grazing my skin.

“Yes baby. I gotta go. I’m sorry.” He answered.

It made me feel sad right away.

“But you only slept for a couple of hours.” I told him, refusing to open my eyes.

“It’s fine baby, I have to be there at five so I have to leave now.” He explained.

I struggled to open my eyes so I could look at him this time.

“Are you going home today?” He asked, brushing my hair away from my face.

I nodded.

He tilted his head down. “I might not be able to drive you home. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine Baek. You don’t have to worry about me.” I assured him.

I motioned to sit so he could start getting ready. I watched him got off the bed and I did the same thing so I could switch on the lights. He was putting on his shoes while I retrieved his padded jacket from the couch.

I walked him towards the door, my heart heavy at the thought of him leaving once more. He was walking ahead of me and stopped right before the door and leaned on the wall, staring at me.

“I hate doing this.” He stated, as he reached for my hand.

“I’ll miss you.” I mumbled, my attention on his fingers playing with hand.

He didn’t say anything but pulled me into a gentle hug. His hands draped around my back while mine were wrapped around his body.

_Honestly, this wasn’t helping._ This would absolutely make me miss him even more and I knew I had to deal with it the moment he’s gone.

“I’ll come visit you before the tour kicks off. I don’t know how or when but I’ll find a way, okay?”

I nodded when he finally let go of me. We were facing each other now and there was a sudden rush of separation anxiety taking over me.

“Take care of yourself Baek. You should eat on time and try to take a quick break when you’re tired. I know you’re going to be very busy but please don’t overdo yourself, okay?”

_Yes, I probably sounded nagging but I couldn’t help it._

It was his turn to nod, a beautiful smile taking over his lips.

“Will you text me when you get home?” He asked.

I nodded.

“And make sure not to get lost okay?”

I smiled. “I’ll try my best.”

He let out of a small laugh as he ruffled my hair.  
I helped him wear his padded jacket before putting on his cap.

“Are you driving?”

“No, I came with Mr. Yoo. He’s probably waiting for me in the car.”

“What? He was waiting for you all this time?”

“Yeah. He distracted people in the lobby so I could sneak in. I’ll contact him on my way down to do the same thing to avoid people from recognizing me.”

I shook my head sideways amazed of the fact that his life was really like a movie.

“Okay, just be careful.”

“Okay, I’m gonna go now.” He informed but didn’t move.

I looked at him, wondering. Then he titled his head to his right, lifted a finger and pointed at his cheek. I couldn’t help but smile before I tiptoed so I could kiss him. But when my lips were about to touch his cheek, he turned to face me making my lips land on his mouth.

I was a bit surprised but didn’t have the time to pull away when he placed a hand at the back of my head to hold it steady while he kissed me softly. His satin like lips taking over my full attention for a few seconds while the kiss lasted. When his lips left my mouth, he proceeded to plant a light kiss on the corner of mouth.

“Wait for me.” He breathed before finally pulling away. “Go back to sleep now Baby. I’ll call you later.”

I could only nod since my heart felt like being crushed at the moment.

_I hate this. I hate saying goodbye to him._

The next moment I knew, he was already opening the door and then he’s gone.

***

I walked back to the bed trying my hardest to ignore the feeling in my chest. I immediately faced his side of the bed. His absence instantly making known as I extended an arm on the mattress he previously occupied.

Closing my eyes, I pictured him out.  
I did it for a couple of minutes until I sleep thankfully won over me.

***

I left Seoul after lunchtime.

The train just left the station about half an hour ago. I was sitting right next to the window and was watching the view outside when I felt my phone vibrated inside denim jacket I was wearing, which I must note to be Baekhyun’s.

Byun:  
 ** _Did you leave?_**  
1:38PM

Me:  
 ** _Yes Baek. I’m on the train now._**  
1:40PM

Byun:  
 ** _Sad._**  
1:40PM

My lips automatically curved as I imagined him pouting.  
Me:  
 ** _Yes, sad._**  
1:41PM

Byun:  
 ** _I’ll see you soon baby, I promise._**  
1:42PM

Me:  
 ** _M’kay…._**  
1:42PM

Byun:  
 ** _…?_**  
1:42PM

Me:  
 ** _Baby…_**  
1:42PM

He sent me three heart emojis and I swear I smiled like crazy.

Byun:  
 ** _Did you see it?_**  
1:43PM

My forehead creased.

Me:  
 ** _See what?_**  
1:43PM

Byun:  
 ** _Check Gallery._**  
1:44PM

_Gallery? Did he mean my phone gallery?_  
I was about to tap on the icon of my phone gallery when I received another message from him.

Byun:  
 ** _I gotta go back to rehearsals now. Don’t forget to text me when you get home._**  
01:45PM

I wasn’t able to reply anymore since curiosity was what took over me. I went back to my gallery and found an unfamiliar video. I fished for my earphones inside my bag right away. I tapped on it and it started playing. It was a video of him playing the piano. He probably had my phone placed at the corner where I could both see him and the piano keys. His beautiful fingers were busy with the keys, his eyes closed as if he was feeling the melody.

The melody was so good and when he started singing, his honey voice.

_Your eyes, I could look at them for a lifetime and I’d still long for you_  
Your lips, I could kiss them over and over again, please tell me I could  
Your hair, they remind me of the summer breeze the day I met you.

Gosh, his voice…the lyrics…his facial expressions, his fingers on the piano keys…

_You’re like the golden leaves of autumn leaving me breathless with your beauty_  
Your smiles brought spring to my loneliness, I need you like crazy   
_Oh you’re the summer to my winter days, oh I love to love you._

I didn’t know which one to appreciate first. Everything was just so good.

_And I guess I need you like the morning needs the light,_  
I guess I want you like the stars in the night  
Yes, I need you like I’ve never needed anyone before.

He was hitting the notes effortlessly and beautifully.

_Hold my hand like you’re never letting me go_  
Tell me, you’ll love me till this is thru  
This love ain’t easy, I know, I know  
But baby, promise me you’ll never letting me go.

The chorus just got me tearing up. I wasn’t aware of the pooling tears in my eyes as I watched and listened to him. The song also felt very personal. The way he would stare at the camera like he was staring through my soul.

When he stopped singing, he concentrated on playing the piano and the music was giving me all kinds of feelings. One of the best melodies I’ve ever heard in my life.

When his playing slowed down, he turned to the camera and mouthed a voiceless “I love you” before closing his eyes, a subtle smile taking over his lips.

I finished watching the video and for a moment, I just didn’t know what to do. I wanted to send him a message but I didn’t really know what to tell him exactly.

Wow. He’s so good. He’s so great at what he does,  _it almost felt like I was falling for him all over again._  
Well, I guess he did intend to make me fall in love with him more.

_Because it’s working._

After a few minutes of trying to calm my system, I went to my messages and started to type my reply. As a matter of fact, I tried to retype my message over and over again because I couldn’t seem to find the right words to tell him about the video.

Me:  
 ** _Baekhyun it’s beautiful. It’s perfect!_**  
2:11PM

I wanted to tell him a lot more. I wanted to tell him how his voice is my favourite in the world or how his facial expressions and the emotion of his voice take me into a trance whenever I listen to him sing. He sang in ways no one ever does. He’s talented and deserved all the love and support from his fans.

_God, how could this man be so perfect?_

I wanted to watch the video one more time but I stopped myself because it would surely make me miss him ever more. The truth was, I didn’t think I could even miss him even more because the sinking feeling in my heart was almost unbearable.

I shoved my phone back inside my purse and glued my attention to the view outside the window.  
However, I unconsciously closed my eyes and thought of his video.

_Hold my hand like you’re never letting me go_  
Tell me, you’ll love me till this is thru  
This love ain’t easy, I know, I know  
But baby, promise me you’ll never letting me go.

Oh dear heart. Please be strong.  
 _I prayed._

***

I just arrived at the station when my phone rang. Seeing that it was Baekhyun, I walked towards a spot free of other people.

“Hey.” I said right after I answered his call.

“It’s yours.” He replied which got me a bit puzzled.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean the song I sang in the video.” He answered. “It’s for you.”

I felt myself blushing. There was no way I wouldn’t in this situation.

“R-really?” I stuttered.

“Really.”

I bit my lip unable to come up with something for a second.

“Are you crying?” He teased. “Well, if I were you I’d be so moved too.”

I let out of a soft laugh.

“You’re crazy.” I told him.

“I’m going to sing it at the concert.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” He replied quickly. “Just know that it’s you I’d be thinking about every time I sing it.”

My cheeks felt really hot by now as I felt the forming of tears in my eyes. I wanted to thank him but I just couldn’t.

“Hey Baby, are you still there?”

“Yeah.” I uttered. “I’m just…” I trailed off as I went to sit on the bench. “I’m just thinking how all of this is real right now. I mean, watching you sing that song while playing the piano…it was so beautiful Baekhyun. And you telling me that it’s for me… it’s just so…so overwhelming like I keep asking myself what have I done to deserve a man like you. How come I’m in a relationship with someone who’s adored by everyone? And honestly, every time I look at you I just had to pause and ask myself if everything is indeed real. I don’t know sometimes, it’s just too good to be true…”

I heard him took a deep breath from the other line.

“But this is real.” He said after a second. “I am in love with you… so bad.” He added in a firm but gentle voice. “As much as I don’t want you to think about my celebrity status, I guess it’ll be inevitable because it’s part of who I am. Just know that no matter what I do or who you see me with on TV, it’s you that I’d always think about at the end of the day. You’re my last thoughts at night and my first in the morning.”

I smiled, I couldn’t help it.

“Is that a line from one of your songs or something?” I joked wanting to distract myself and my feelings from being emotional.

I didn’t want to get everyone’s attention by crying at the station.

He laughed.

“Stop being cute, can’t you see how much I want to be with you right now?” I heard him say.

I let out of a gloomy sigh without meaning to.

“I want you here with me too.” I told him, couldn’t help myself from being honest. “But I can’t have you all to myself, I guess.”

There was silence from the other line and I thought I might have been too honest about how I feel right now.

_What was I thinking?_   _I was definitely making this harder for him._

“Baek, I’m sorry.” I said a bit rattled inside. “I guess I’m just being extra clingy, I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s fine baby. Don’t worry. I know.” He intercepted in a downcast tone. “I know how hard this is for you too. Thank you for being so strong.”

I bit my lip, feeling that sinking feeling behind my chest once more.

“Gosh, I can’t believe I’m being this dramatic right now.”

He let out of a soft laugh and it made me miss him even more.

“There’s nothing wrong with missing your handsome boyfriend, really.” He replied sounding amused.

The corner of my lips turned upwards. I just loved how he seemed to know how to what to say exactly to make me feel better.

“Now, go home safely, will you?”

“M’kay.”

“I love you.”

No matter how many times he already told me that he loved me, I swear I still get the same feeling.

“I love you too.”

***

It was almost thirty minutes past four in the afternoon when I arrived at my Aunt’s house. Since I hadn’t been home for a long time, I took time to help her prepare dinner that night. She asked me about my trip with Baekhyun and I responded how beautiful it was and told her some stuff about it. And I was somehow delighted to see her positive reactions towards it. I could truly tell that Auntie was already a bit comfortable with my relationship with Baekhyun.

Later that night, I also went to Ji Hye’s room and gave her the signed albums Baekhyun got for her. He placed it inside the paper bag he brought last night along with my things. As expected, Ji Hye went all jumpy the moment she took hold of the albums. She was so happy she even cried. I, on the other hand kept smiling as I watched her genuine delight. She kept thanking me for going back to Korea and for meeting Baekhyun because not only she was able to have his signed albums but was also able to see him in person which she referred to as a miracle. I laughed at her statements and stayed with her for a few more minutes before going back to my room.

The first thing I did when I got inside was lie on my bed. I closed my eyes and realized how exhausted I was already. I decided to go take a shower before I finally succumb to sleep.

***

I woke up the next day receiving a call from Baekhyun about the  _photoshoot_  with Kim Ara. He sounded hesitant while he was explaining it to me. I totally forgot about it and hearing it from him right now took me back to the time I met Ara in his house and I was not quite sure how to feel about it. He said that he just found out that the proceeds of this magazine will go to a specific charity and he’s confused if he was going to do it or not. He also mentioned that they both have to fly to Paris together next week right after the two-day kick off of his tour.

_He and Ara together in Paris for a couple of days. I forced my poor brain to process it fully well._

“I’m not going to do it if you don’t want me to.” He told me.

I just woke up and my brain’s capacity to think wasn’t that excellent yet but hearing that the money will go to a charity, I couldn’t really tell him to say no to it. That would just be selfish. Yes, I wasn’t comfortable about him being with his ex- girlfriend, who I must note the public really liked, but I have to understand that this was all part of his job as a celebrity.

“It’s okay Baekhyun.” I told him, making an effort to sound convincing.

“Are you sure?” He asked, obviously skeptical.

“Yes.” I replied. “Don’t worry about me. I understand that you’re going to do this for the charity. I know you have a good heart Baekhyun and as your girlfriend, I’ll support you.”

“Even if it’s going to be with Ara?”

I paused for a second.

“Honestly, I’m not really comfortable with this because I kept thinking how it’s going to make you feel. You know, seeing us together again and how people would react about it. I mean, I am fully aware of how it made you feel the last time and I don’t really want to give you a reason to feel that way again but…”

“Baek…” I intercepted. “You asked me to trust you, right?”

There was a brief moment of silence.

“And that’s what I’m doing exactly. I trust you.”

“Really?”

“Yes really.” I said firmly. “Just don’t let her kiss you or something.” I joked.

He laughed.

“I love my possessive girlfriend.”

I ended up laughing too.

We talked for about five more minutes before we hung up. Right after the call, I remained seated on my bed for a couple of minutes asking myself if I indeed made the right decision or if I was really okay with it.

Of course, I wasn’t a hundred percent okay about it but I didn’t want to be selfish. I also knew he didn’t want to do it if not for the charity. Knowing his influence and popularity, I was sure the magazine will sell out. I couldn’t be selfish and I knew he didn’t want to as well.

Then I suddenly recalled how Ara hugged him that day in the living room and I instantly felt a pang in my heart.

_Am I ready to feel that way again the moment I see and hear people talk about them again?_

I guess there was really no way to get myself ready for that.  
 _But I have to trust Baekhyun.  
I trust him._

***

He got a bit busy the next few days and wasn’t able to come visit me before his tour started just as he promised which I of course understood. He would call me in the morning, text me in between his rehearsals and call me at night when he got home.

He also said that he sent me VIP tickets saying that he would love it if Ji Hye and I could come. I told him that Ji Hye couldn’t really come since her examinations were approaching so Auntie wouldn’t allow her which got her crying her heart out.

I originally told him that I wouldn’t be able to be there too as I planned to keep it a secret. I didn’t want him to get distracted knowing that I’d be there. I wanted him to focus on the concert.

So, I went to Seoul on the first day of his concert. I actually intended to book a hotel near the venue the night before but all the nearest hotels were already fully booked by his fans _. Gosh, his popularity still surprises me from time to time._

I arrived at Seoul at three and since his concert will start at eight, I had time to roam around. I went to the nearest shopping areas to look for a present to congratulate him. Actually, I wasn’t really sure if I’d be able to meet him later but I just wanted to get him something. But then as I continued to check on every store, I got frustrated not being able to find anything.

_I kept asking myself, what else I could possibly give to someone who seemed to already have everything._

At five in the afternoon, my legs were already tired so I decided to look for a café to eat something. I was walking on the street when I noticed a car stopped next to me. My heart beat faster as I checked the car. It wasn’t Baekhyun’s nor Kyungsoo’s so I wasn’t really familiar with it.

Then the window rolled down and revealed who the driver was.

“Miss Park.” He called.

_It was Mr. Yoo._

“Mr. Yoo?” I said, unbelievably.

_How on earth did I just bump into Baekhyun’s Bodyguard when my presence here should be a secret?_

“Hi. Are you going to watch the concert?” He asked once more.

“Uh…” I trailed off as I walked closer to him. “Yeah. But can you please not tell him about it?” I pleaded.

“Ahhh…a surprise?” He replied, smiling.

I blushed.

“Let’s keep this a secret, please?”

He laughed.

“Okay Miss Park. Don’t worry. I won’t tell him anything.”

“Thanks Mr. Yoo.”

“So, where are you heading?”

“I’m about to go look for a café to eat something.”

“Well, hop in. I’ll take you there.”

“No, it’s okay really. I don’t want to disturb you and shouldn’t you be with him right now?”

“Yes.” He chuckled. “I’m on my way to the venue actually but it’s fine. I’ll take you to his favourite café, it’s just nearby.” He persuaded.

I thought for about a few seconds and going to his favourite café sounded really tempting so I ended up getting inside Mr Yoo’s car.

“Are you sure it’s fine Mr Yoo?” I asked right after putting on the seatbelt.

“Yes. You’re my boss’ girlfriend may I remind you.”

I felt my face heating once more so I looked away.

“Are you staying at a hotel?”

“No.” I answered quickly and I didn’t know why. “I mean the hotels were all fully booked by the concert goers, I guess.”

“Well, it’s Baekhyun. His concerts are very in demand and gets sold out easily. Your boyfriend is really famous Miss Park.

I didn’t really know how to respond to that so I just smiled shyly.

“Did you go shopping?” He asked, getting my attention once more.

“No, I wanted to get him something but I couldn’t. I don’t know what to give him.”

“Well, you’re here and I am pretty sure that’s enough.”

I almost laughed at what he just said. I couldn’t believe I’m hearing it from his body guard.

“How long have you been working for him?” I asked him.

“Four years.” He answered as he turned the car right.

“Don’t you find it hard? I mean you have to be with him most of the time.”

“Not really. He only asked me to go with him when he’s got schedules. And he’s a good man, he’s not like the other celebrities who are really full of themselves. He’s humble and sensible. Manager Kang and I like that about him, so I wouldn’t really trade him for anyone else.” He smiled at me taking his attention off the road for a brief moment. “Don’t worry Miss Park, I’ll protect your boyfriend well.”

I laughed, unable to stifle it anymore.  
I couldn’t believe Mr Yoo was so easy to converse with.

I found out that he’s not married yet but he’s got a fiancé and plans to get married next year. She’s a middle school teacher who happened to be Baekhyun’s fan too and was very supportive of his job.

We talked for about a couple of minutes more before dropping me off right outside the café called  _Luces._  He also told me what Baekhyun liked to order which didn’t really come as a shocker anymore,  _Strawberry smoothie._

After thanking and reminding him not to tell Baekhyun about our meeting, I got off his car and proceeded to the café. The place seemed really interesting, instantly reminding me of the café at my mom’s hometown. The place was really cozy with its all shades of brown interior. The café definitely had a really beautiful atmosphere, no wonder Baekhyun liked it here. There were only a few people inside. I could hear  _Amazing You by Han Dong Geun_  being played and it added to the coziness of the place.

After ordering, I roamed my attention around to find a good spot when I saw his framed autograph on the wall. My lips turning into an upward curve, I walked towards the unoccupied table near it.

I stayed there for about thirty minutes before I decided to head out and go to the venue. As I walked nearing the stadium, I couldn’t help but feel nervous. I kept thinking about him, was he nervous too? I took my phone out and took a picture of the huge LED board which says:

**_Fearless: The Byun Baekhyun Tour_ **

I seea lot of people coming in and I just couldn’t help but be proud.It almost seemed as if I had to remind myself over and over again of how big of a celebrity he was. I saw several groups gathered together with their banners with Baek’s name on it and their light sticks which I happen to have as well,  _thanks to Ji Hye_. When she found out that I was going to watch his concert, she rushed to her room and presented it to me saying that I shouldn’t go to the concert empty handed.

I took one last breath before I decided to get inside the venue.

***

The concert will start in twenty minutes. It turned out that he gave me a front row seat surrounded by his fans. They all seem very excited and yet here I was so nervous as if I was the one who would perform. I realized that I haven’t really texted him so I took my phone out to at least wish him good luck only to find an unread text message from him.

Byun:  
 ** _Baby, please call me._**  
07:16PM

For some reasons, my heart almost skipped a beat when I read his message. I roamed my attention around and there was no way we could talk in this situation. But then, I knew I had to call him before the concert starts. So, I got up asking the lady next to me to check on my chair while I go to the bathroom. She was thankfully kind and gave me a smile.

I went out of the venue to go to the nearest bathroom. Since the concert was starting in a few minutes, the comfort room was empty. I went to the last cubicle, locked it before I dialled his number.

“Hey.” I uttered the moment he picked up. “Are you okay? What’s the matter? Are you nervous? How are you feeling?” I interrogated right away.

He laughed on the other line.

“Yes but you seem to be more nervous than I am.” He answered.

“Well you asked me to call, what else I am supposed to think?”

“I’m fine Baby, just wanted to hear your voice before the concert starts.”

“Can you please stop being sweet when I’m so tensed.”

“Why are you so tensed?”

“I…” I trailed off knowing that I shouldn’t tell him that I was here. “I don’t know.”

He laughed once more.

“Enjoy the show baby.” He replied.

_Did he just tell me to enjoy the show?_

“What do you mean?” I said, trying my best not to sound obvious.

“I mean, I’m going to do my best knowing that you’re watching.”

_He knew._  There was no way he didn’t yet.

“Did Mr. Yoo…” I trailed off when I heard him laughing again. “Of course he did.”

“You must know that he’s very loyal to me.” He told me.

“But I told him not to tell you.” I whined.

“Yeah, he told me that it’s supposed to be a surprise, right?”

He was obviously teasing me already.

“Yes and it’s not anymore.”

He line went silent and I wondered what he could be thinking.

“You’re so sweet.” He said after a couple of seconds. “Thanks for being here for me. I have the most supportive girlfriend in the world.”

For some reasons, I forgot about my failed attempt to surprise him and smiled at his remarks.

I wasn’t able to reply immediately when I heard someone calling for him on the other line.

“Baby, I gotta go now. I’ll meet you right after the concert okay? Wait for my call.” He said, this time his voice was just above a whisper.

“Don’t get hurt, okay?” It was all that I could say.

“Yes ma’am.”

***

The stadium was filled with cheering the moment the show started. The lights went off and only the light sticks were visible. I swear I could feel my heart beating so fast right behind my chest.  _Gosh, why was this so nerve racking._

Then the whole arena almost broke when he started singing. The spotlight was on him while he sang a cappella for a few seconds, his beautiful voice filling the place.

He was wearing a blue, satin, button down shirt leaving the first two buttons undone revealing just the right amount of his chest, black pants and shoes. His black hair wasn’t styled much but my gosh, he looked so hot in my eyes right now which was probably why the fans were screaming atop of their lungs right now.

The music started as he moved forward, he’s got back up dancers with him now and without a warning started to dance. I knew he’s good at dancing but seeing him perform before my eyes now just made my heart really weak.

_That’s your boyfriend, Park Hae Won._  
 _You’re one damn lucky girl._  
The voice in my head, freaking out.

By the time he got to the third song, he was sweating that his hair looked damp by now. He hadn’t passed my way yet since I was situated at the right side of the stage and I hope he wouldn’t anytime soon because I was certain I wouldn’t survive it.

_I was totally fangirling over my boyfriend right now and I didn’t want him to see it. It’s embarrassing._

The show went on and he had a few outfit changes. He had also sang some of his famous songs. By the time he went out once more, he was sitting right in front of piano wearing a dark colored suit.

My heartbeat went wild at the sight of the piano.  
Could he really be singing that song?

The audience went really quiet, all of us anticipating and appreciating the melody he was playing.

It’s  _the_  song. It’s the one he recorded on my phone.

When he started singing, most of us lost it.

_Your eyes, I could look at them for a lifetime and I’d still long for you_  
Your lips, I could kiss them over and over again, please tell me I could  
Your hair, they remind me of the summer breeze the day I met you.

“Oh my god his voice!” I heard someone exclaimed. “How is his voice this beautiful?”

_Just know that it’s you I’d be thinking about every time I sing it._  I imagined how he said it the last time. I smiled, wanting to cry as I listened to how his beautiful voice filled my ears. Listening to him sing it live was just ten times overwhelming.

_Hold my hand like you’re never letting me go  
Tell me, you’ll love me till all of this is thru_

I had to bite my lower lip so hard to stop myself from crying and making a scene but was surprised to see some of the fans crying around me. I guess Baekhyun really had it, you know there was just something about how he sang it that made us experience the song in a more personal level.

_This love ain’t easy, I know, I know  
But baby, promise me you’ll never letting me go._

The song ended and he went center stage and sang one of his ballad songs. His falsettos sounded so good I couldn’t blame his fans from praising him from time to time.

Time passed, and the concert was about to come to an end. He was giving his ending  _ment_  thanking everyone for coming and supporting him and I swear, I swear I saw him look and smiled my way.

His encore song was called  _Cherish_ , it was a light and happy one. He was with his back up dancers once more. I held my breath when I saw him walked towards the right side of the stage and stopped right in front of me. He sang a few lines of his song there and subtly made a few eye contacts while smiling through the lyrics of the song.

_My heart almost did a backflip._

He winked  _at me_  before leaving and went to a different spot leaving me blushing.

_Wow. That was a whole new experience._

***

His concert ended about thirty minutes ago. I was standing at the bus stop since I didn’t know where else to wait for him. He’d probably call me since he couldn’t just show up right in front of me being surrounded by his fans who watched the concert.

There were two girls who were probably my age sitting a meter away from me. They kept talking about how good Baekhyun was the entire time.

“Wait! Kim Ara was there?!”

I immediately turned to them and found one of them gasping while they both looked at their phones.

_“Here! Look at these photos…Wow, she’s so pretty. She was really there.”_  
“I’m not surprised. I bet she met Baekhyun backstage right after the concert.”  
“Yes! She used to do it a lot in his previous concerts right?”  
“Yes and I really envy her. She gets to kiss and hug him and all.”  
“But they’re not together now, right?”  
“Well who knows? Why would Ara be here then? I don’t think they’re just friends at this state….”

Their statements faded as I walked away from them. I couldn’t really stand listening to them anymore. I was so ecstatic a minute ago and just the thought of Ara being there made me feel very uncomfortable now.

I was walking absent minded on the streets, totally forgetting about waiting for Baekhyun’s call. I shoved my phone inside my purse and I try to put as much distance from those girls at the bus stop.

I walked ahead for about twenty minutes until I found a playground. Given that it’s almost eleven in the evening, the playground was empty. I walked and sat on one of the swings. My mind was blank, I wasn’t thinking about Ara but I wasn’t thinking about Baekhyun too. I just sat there, listening to the quiet, enduring the extra cold night in Seoul.

About ten minutes later, I felt my phone ringing. Actually, I was sure it wasn’t the first time I heard it. I was just busy spacing out a while ago. I took my phone out of my purse and saw Baekhyun calling me.

“Baek…”

“Oh thank god, where are you? I’ve been calling you. Are you okay?”

He’s been calling me?  
He sounded really worried.

“Where are you? Did you get lost?”

“I… uhm…” I looked around, not having any clue where I was exactly. “I’m at the playground.”

“Playground? Where?”

“I’m not sure. I just walked here. Probably twenty minutes away for the venue of your concert.”

“Okay, I’ll go look for you.” He replied quickly. “Don’t go anywhere. Just wait for me, okay?”

“Okay Baekhyun.”

***

I was staring at my feet when I found another pair of feet right in front of me. I looked up and saw him. He held me and made me stand facing him. He was wearing a cap and a padded jacket which he immediately took off and drape around me.

“What are you doing here all alone at this time…” He stated, worry still evident in his tone. “You weren’t answering any of my messages and calls, you got me so worried.”

“I’m sorry, I just…” I trailed off not sure if I wanted to tell him the truth.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

I looked at him and even with the cap, I could see his handsome bare face. Then I realized how much I missed him. We haven’t really seen each other since the trip and finally seeing him now made me feel so emotional.

I stepped towards him and slowly slipped my arms inside his bomber jacket to hug him.

“Nothing… I just missed you…” I muttered, choosing not to tell him what was bothering me. “I really missed you.” I added trying to keep my voice steady.

I felt an arm wrapped around me while his other hand made their way held my head, holding me closer to him. His warmth and scent both filling my senses was very satisfying right now.  _I didn’t want this to end._

“God, I missed you so much too. You don’t know how much I had to bear for not seeing you for days.” He replied, his statement sending my eyes closed.

We remained hugging each other for about a couple of minutes more. Funny, how we seemed to have both forgotten that we were outside.

When we finally let each other go, he took my hand and brought them to his mouth for a kiss, while his eyes met mine.

“Let’s go.” He said afterwards, turning to lead the way.

“Where are you taking me?” I asked him while I followed him.

He stopped on his feet and turned to face me.

“Of course, I’m taking you home with me.” He said, his lips forming into a soft smile.

I was sure I was mesmerized by that small smile for a moment before we both continued to walk towards his car. And we were about a couple of feet away from it when I felt something cold landed on my cheek.

I instantly stopped walking and he did the same thing. I watched him turn to me once more with a puzzled look on his face, probably wondering why we stopped again.

I met his eyes for a brief second before tilting my head up towards the sky.  
  
  
  
  
  


  
_Snow._

  
~♥~

 


	29. Twenty Nine

**Twenty Nine  
  
  
**  
  
~♥~   
  


  
 _I couldn’t believe winter had finally arrived._  
  
We were standing under the shade right next to the playground since I asked him to stay for a while so we could watch the snow a bit longer. Since the place was empty of other people, I thought it wasn’t going to be risky and he might have thought of the same thing since he agreed.  
  
The lights coming from the light posts were kind of dim and it pretty much complemented the snow. This was my first snowfall in Korea after I came back. And honestly, it kind of felt nostalgic too. Maybe because I couldn’t really remember the last time I get to just pause and watch it.  
  
I stretched a hand out to catch the falling snowflakes. I loved how they feel icy cold against my skin at fist and melt right away. I’ve been doing it for the couple of minutes when I felt him hold my other hand. I instantly turned to him and was welcomed by gentle expression on his face. His lips curved into a smile and it just gave me the most heartwarming feeling.  
  
I saw him extend his other hand out too and did what I was exactly doing. He looked up and I watched how his face lit up. Watching him right now was making me feel so soft.  
  
Everything seemed to be in a slow motion. I just stared at him until his eyes met mine once more. I loved how we just gazed at each other in the absence of words or the fact that we weren’t worried about being caught this time. The rest of the world didn’t seem to matter for now.  
  
My hand fell to my side as I felt my feet moving towards him and I tiptoed to plant a kiss on his cheek. He seemed a bit surprised by what I did but nevertheless pulled me into a hug afterwards.  
  
 _They say if you’re with someone you love during the first snowfall, you’ll stay together for a long time.  
I never hoped for this to be true so bad until now._  
  
  
***  
  
By the time we got to his house, the snowing got a bit hard. Since he parked his car outside, it was impossible not to get wet as soon as we got out of the car. We ran to the entrance of his house and stopped when we were right outside the main door. I head him chuckle right beside me which caught my attention right away. When I looked at him, a handsome grin was on his face while he brought his hand to my heard. My forehead creased for a moment wondering what was he about to do but then I realized that he was getting rid of the snow on my hair.  
  
“Snow looks good on you but…” He trailed off as he met my eyes for a second. “I don’t want you to get sick.”  
  
 _There goes the butterflies again._  
  
I smiled and looked away for a bit.  
  
“What?” He asked, wondering.  
  
“Will you stop giving me the butterflies?” I answered wanting to tease him.  
  
He let out of a soft laugh while he led his hand to the small of my back and pulled me closer till our bodies were pressed against each other.  
  
I was a bit flustered at how swift and flawless he was able to do it.  
  
“I won’t.” He said, smirking. “In fact, I plan to give you the whole zoo.”  
  
My eyes grew wide at his remarks.  
  
“What?” I asked, unbelievably as I laughed.  
  
“Yeah, I’ll give you not just butterflies but tigers, elephants, monkeys…” He enumerated exaggeratingly. “And… ah! Dinosaurs.” He added as he roared leaning closer until his teeth grazed my neck.  
  
I laughed so hard as I hit him on the arm.  
  
“Dinosaurs don’t bite like that.” I argued.  
  
“Yes they do!” He insisted as he did it one more time. “My kindergarten teacher told me so.” He added when we’re both facing again.  
  
We held each other’s gaze for a few seconds as if we were trying to resist it but later on burst out laughing at the same time.  
  
We were barely done laughing when we got inside his house.  
  
“Gosh you’re so funny, I love you.” I blurted, out of nowhere and unintentionally.  
  
“Oh I know you do.” He replied as he grabbed my hand.  
  
He pinned me on the wall before taking his cap off, dropping it on the floor. Then he brought his hands on either sides of my head, leaning on the wall.  
  
“Are you trying to seduce me right now Byun Baekhyun?” I asked him trying to stifle a smile.  
  
He smirked.  
  
“Why? Is it working?” He answered in an obviously modulated sexy voice.  
  
“Hmmm…” I pretended to hard about it. “A little bit.”  
  
“Let’s see.” He replied.

Then he brought a hand to my face, his delicate fingers tracing my jaw. And I just didn’t know what it was with the way he’s doing it that was making it hard for me to breathe. I just had to ball my hands into fists, crumpling the hem of my sweater.  
  
“So?”  
  
“Eighty percent.” I muttered.  
   
This time I felt his thumb tracing my bottom lip, I saw how his Adam’s apple moved as he swallowed. And just at the right moment, wet his own lip.  
  
“Ninety percent.” I managed to say right after holding my breath for a second.  
  
There was a hint of amusement on his face as he gently tilted my head on the right, tucked my hair behind my ear before leaning closer to plant a kiss on my neck right under my ear.  
  
“Don’t fight it.” He whispered on my ear. “You know you want me.” He added before giving my earlobe a small bite.  
  
It instantly sent shivers down my spine  
  
He went back to look at me in the eyes, his hands on my shoulders as if wanting to keep me steady. Then, he inched his face closer to mine leaving a least distance possible, keeping our lips from touching. The anticipation he was trying to purposely build here was increasing and I was so certain I’m going to lose it any moment from now.  
  
 _He’s such a tease.  
  
I give up.  _I could never win this game against him, anyway.  
  
“One hun-”  
  
He didn’t even let me finish my sentence anymore since he didn’t waste any time and claimed my lips right away. I thought that this kiss was going to be slow and gentle but his pace surprisingly went aggressive and passionate after a few seconds.  
  
How I had to cling to him for support meant how our kiss was drowning me, leaving me weak in the knees.  
  
Realizing how much I missed him, I wrapped my hands around his neck, my hands playing with his hair. I also unconsciously leaned closer to him as if the littlest space remaining between us was a sin. I heard him groan, tugging at my lower lip.  
  
“Damn, I love it when you flirt back.” He managed to say when we broke the kiss a bit for air.  
  
“Wh-” I was supposed to protest but didn’t give me the chance to do so when he cupped my face and started to kiss me hard once more.  
  
 _Okay_ _Byun Baekhyun…you won_ , I thought.  
  
After a couple of minutes, the doorbell rang.  
  
“Are you expecting someone?” I asked him, wondering as I leaned away.  
  
He sighed gloomily.  
  
“Unfortunately, yes.” He answered. “Mr. Yoo. I have an agreement to sign and that’s why he’s here right now.”  
  
I let out of a soft laugh as I nudged him away from me.  
  
“Go.” I told him.  
  
“Yeah and I’ll probably talk to him about getting his timing right next time.” He said sounding annoyed at first but smiled eventually. “Why don’t you go take a shower for now, as I have said, I don’t want my baby to catch a cold.” He suggested as he pressed his hands against my cheeks so hard leaving my lips forcing a pout.  
  
He let out of a soft laugh, making fun of how I looked _for sure._  
  
***  
  
I finished taking a shower and for some reasons, instead of wearing my own clothes which I happened to have with me since I brought extra ones with me, I went to look for his clothes. I chose a comfortable looking brown gray sweater and pajamas of the same color. Both of them were too big for me of course but they felt so comfortable. I walked towards the bed, drying my hair with a towel when I saw my phone on his bedside table. I was really tempted to check on it but I was too scared that my curiosity will lead me online and come across with photos I didn’t really want to see. So, taking a deep breath, I walked passed it and went to look for him downstairs.  
  
I found him standing right next to the tempered glass wall in the living room, barefoot, his hair wet and I thought that he might have taken a shower too. He was wearing a dark sweatpants which I couldn’t really tell if it was black or navy blue, white shirt… _ugh he and his white_ _shirts_.  
  
He was facing away from me and I noticed that he was making a phone call, his other hand shoved inside his pocket. He must have felt my presence as he slowly turned around and smiled at me. His eyes grew big for a moment probably because of what I was wearing.  
  
He was still talking on the phone and who I figured out was Manager Kang based on what they were talking about.  
  
Then I came to think, this was the same person who performed at the concert a while ago. That same extremely hot celebrity who made a lot of women go crazy earlier.  
  
 _He was the same man and he was standing right in front of me right now._  
This again, felt like a dream. _When will I stop trying to convince myself that this was all real?_  
  
He was gazing at me and I just knew I had to look away or I’d melt anytime soon. Thankfully, my attention was caught by the falling snow outside visible through the glass walls.  
  
 _Oh, it’s so beautiful._ Though winter may not be my favorite time of the year, there was always something about the snow that drew me in. The cold, the icy feel it gave me whenever I watch it was just irreplaceable. It felt so good watching them fall, intending to dress the world in white.  
  
I was so engrossed with everything that’s taking place outside that I didn’t notice him already standing closely right next to me. We looked at each other for a brief second before his attention darted to my feet. Next thing I knew, he bent to fold them since they were very long for me.  
  
 _I smiled, I couldn’t help it._  
  
 Then he went behind me, his hands landing on the curve of my waist.  
  
“You look sexy.” He whispered right next to my ear.  
  
“Sexy?” I asked unbelievably. “In these?” I added.  
  
“Uh-huh.” He replied.  
  
“But these are your clothes.”  
  
“Exactly.” He trailed off as he looked at me intently. “Don’t you know how sexy you look in my clothes?” He added as I felt him kiss my shoulder.  
  
I got totally distracted when his hands circled around my waist, back hugging me.  
  
 _God, I missed him so much._ I hadn’t seen him for a more than a week but it already felt like months since the last time we were together.  
  
“By the way…” I muttered as I placed my hands over his own.  
  
“Hmmm?”  
  
“I’m so proud of you.” I told him hoping there was a way for him to know how proud I was. “You did really well…” I trailed off when he tightened his hold around me.  “I couldn’t almost believe that I was seeing my boyfriend perform right in front of my eyes.”  
  
“Well, I intend to make my girl proud.” He replied and I could almost feel him smiling by the way he said it. “I’m glad it worked.”  
  
“Did you also intend to turn your girlfriend into your _fangirl_?”  
  
His laugh sounded so good.  
  
“Part of the whole plan.”  
  
I couldn’t help but laugh at his remarks.  
  
“Sorry, I couldn’t get you anything. I was planning to buy a present to congratulate you but I just didn’t know what to give you.”  
  
He loosened his hands around me and made me face him. I automatically wrapped my arms around his neck.  
  
“Are you kidding me? You came.” He told me as he lifted a hand to tuck my hair behind my ear. “Nothing’s better than you being here baby.” He continued with a subtle smile on his lips.  
  
“Which was supposed to be a surprise but thanks to Mr. Yoo for keeping it a secret from you.” I said trying to whine about it.  
  
His literal _HA HA HA_ laughed filled the entire room.  
  
“He told me he won’t tell you about it.” I went on.    
  
“I’m pretty sure he really intend to keep it a secret but then he saw me sulking, looking intently at my phone because you didn’t even call nor sent me a message.”  
  
I instantly felt guilty at the thought.  
  
“Well, I mean I surely didn’t need some good luck message before performing before but it’s a bit different not that I have you. I at least expected to hear your voice before getting on the stage.”

He paused to pout and I had to fight the urge not to kiss him.  
  
 _Gosh, his cute little pout._     
  
“Anyway, I probably looked _that_ frustrated to him, so he came to me and asked if he could have a word and then told me that he saw you and you’re going to watch the concert but it was supposed to be a secret and asked me not to tell you that he told me.”  
  
After hearing what really happened, I kind of felt a little less betrayed.  
   
“So are you telling me he only did it to make you feel better?”  
  
“I believe so.” He nodded.  
  
“Okay, then I forgive Mr. Yoo. I won’t hold a grudge against him anymore.”  
  
I was trying to stifle a laugh imagining Mr. Yoo torn between telling between being true to his word to me and telling Baekhyun about it.  
  
“And not contacting you was supposed to be a part of the whole plan Mister.” I told him in a matter of fact tone.  
  
“Okay, okay noted baby.” He agreed with a soft laugh.  
  
Apart from his voice, his laugh was also a blessing to _humanity._  
  
“So…” I felt his hands leading to my neck before cupping my face. “Shall we go back to the bedroom so I could unwrap my present?”  
  
My forehead creased, confused as I meet his eyes.  
  
“What do you mean present?” My question came really quick.  “You said it’s enough that I came.”  
  
“Exactly.” He replied with a handsome grin on his face.  
  
I continued to stare at him trying to make sense of what he was saying.  
  
“But you said….” I trailed off as it finally hit me.   
  
 _I was his present._  
  
I gasped.  
  
“OH MY GOD BAEKHYUN!” I said hitting him on the arm as I stepped away from him.  
  
 _I blushed.  
Really Hard._  
  
He laughed, probably making fun me and how delayed my reaction was.  
  
“YES OH MY GOD BABY!” He mocked, copying the exact way I said it then without a warning, scooped my legs in his arms.  
  
My face was still very hot when while he carried me as we he made a few steps from where we were previously standing. I was still speechless at how he delivered his intentions when he stopped right next to the couch.  
  
“You know what? Forget the fucking bedroom.” He hissed and I wasn’t ready at how he sounded impatiently sexy.  
  
He carefully put me down the couch and the first thing I did was look around. The living room was just too spacious and not to mention he’s got the whole glass wall in here. This was way too uncomfortable so before he could even start anything, I stopped him.  
  
“Baek, wait.” I told him right when he was attempting to take off his shirt which he wasn’t able to continue doing.  
  
He looked at me unbelievably, wondering.  
  
“Not here.” I said firmly.  
  
“Why?”  
  
“Don’t you think we’re too exposed here?”  
  
“What are you talking about?” He asked and waited for my response but I just looked back at him.  
  
He sounded so frustrated and I was convinced I was being heartless when all I wanted to do was laugh at his reaction which I didn’t do anyway.  
  
I stood from the couch as I made my way towards the stairs.  
  
“Are you really serious right now?” He called from the same spot, his hands on his waist. “You’re aware that you’re torturing me by doing this right?”  
  
I bit my lip as I saw how his face turned a bit red while staring at me and for some reasons, I kind of felt nervous.  
  
“You’re going to pay for this.” He warned.  
  
I stepped back hesitantly when I finally saw him walked towards me expecting him to stop in front of me which he did only to grab me and hoisted me over his shoulder, making me shriek in the process.  
  
“Baekhyun, put me down. Wait. This is making me dizzy!” I protested.  
  
 _Well, I wasn’t surprised when I got ignored until we reached his room._  
  
We got in and he went straight to his bed without even closing the door. I was finally able to see his face when he put me down on the bed, leaving me a bit dizzy for a moment.  
  
“Baek wait…” I muttered wanting to ask him to give me a moment to get my senses back.  
  
However, it was as if he couldn’t hear me, I saw him take off his shirt before climbing on the bed on top of me.  
  
“Baekhy-”

“Shhh.” He hushed, pressing a finger against my lips. “No more talking baby.”  
  
I swallowed, feeling my body temperature rise at how hot he looked right now. His slightly damp hair definitely made him irresistible.  
  
 _Someone tell me, how to survive a Byun Baekhyun?_  
  
“Now let’s take my clothes off, shall we?” He told me, his eyes never leaving mine.  
  
Since he wasn’t wearing any shirt on anymore, I was certain he was referring to _his clothes_ especially when I felt him tug the hem of the sweater I was wearing.  
  
 _Oh, his clothes…of course._    
  
As I shut my eyes willing to give him full control over everything from here on, I also decided to shut my thoughts from anything that was bothering me.  
  
 _Everything._  
  
***

3: 17 AM  
  
We were in the kitchen eating since for some _absurd reasons_ , we forgot to ate dinner earlier. He threw a few lame jokes but he’s naturally funny my stomach kind of hurt laughing. He also mentioned how much he wanted to go to my side of the stage a few times but he couldn’t because it wasn’t part of the number.  
  
It was almost four in the morning when we left the kitchen and were about to take the stairs back to his bedroom when he stopped on his feet, grabbed my hand and took me to the couch in the living room.  
  
I didn’t ask but raised an eyebrow.  
  
“I think there’s nothing wrong with sleeping in the couch, right baby?” He asked, seemingly emphasizing the word sleeping as he sat on the said couch.  
  
I let out of a soft laugh, noticing how he’s still a bit annoyed with me protesting about the _couch thing_ a while ago.  
  
“Uh…” I uttered.  
  
I stared at him as if contemplating on my answer when he suddenly pulled me down next to him.  
  
“Of course there’s nothing wrong.” He said, answering his own question.  
  
I laughed at his impatience right before he made us both lie down. He pinned me in the corner, draping an arm and a leg over my body. Our faces were so close but he already had his eyes closed so I ended up staring at his face.  
  
“Don’t you think your bed would be more comfortable Baek?” I asked, curiously. “You need to sleep well.”  
  
“I love how I can snuggle with you like this.” He answered, this time opening his eyes to meet mine.  
  
“Can’t we do it on your bed?”  
  
“Yeah but considering the minimal space this couch has, this is better.”  
  
“Huh?” I wondered, not really getting his point.  
  
“Little space means, you have nowhere else to go.” He said in a matter of fact tone. “It also means I’ll have you this close to me till we wake up.” He added.  
  
“But…” I muttered.  
  
The truth was, I still wanted to argue how his body was going to hurt in the morning but he shut me off by planting a quick kiss on my lips.  
  
“Goodnight baby girl.” He said, his voice just above a whisper with his eyes closed once more.  
  
The gentleness in his tone instantly making me change my mind. I stared at him for a few more minutes, being blessed by his every detail. His eyebrows, his lashes, his nose, the constellation of moles he has, his lips...  
  
I had the urge to brush his hair away from his face but couldn’t because my hands were pinned between our bodies and could only reach his cheeks. I brushed his cheek gently with my thumb as I watch him sleep.  
  
“Goodnight baby.”  
  
I muttered in a sleepy voice before giving in to the heavy weight of my lashes.  
  
***  
  
The next day, I woke up to Baekhyun getting ready to leave. We were already in his room and I was on his bed, tucked in a blanket. How and when I got here, I couldn’t remember anymore. He must have carried me back here, that’s what I was certain about.  
  
I checked the digital watch on his bedside table and it said 09:06 in the morning. I remembered his concert will start at 4PM today which was way earlier than yesterday. He was already dressed in a black shirt, pants and sneakers. I saw him went to his closet area so I decided to get up and follow him there.  
  
I found him standing next to his watch collection, probably deciding which one to wear. I walked towards him and he instantly noticed me. A smile crossed his face the moment he laid eyes on me while he extend his arm to welcome me as I gestured to hug him.  
  
“Good Morning.” I heard him say as he kissed my head.  
  
“Why didn’t you wake me up?” I asked him while my hands were still wrapped around him.  
  
“You need more sleep.” He replied. “You should go back to bed. Take a rest. You don’t have to watch the concert today. You can just stay here and wait for me to come back later then I’ll drive you home.”  
  
“Are you sure?” I wondered. “You’re going to be so tired right after the concert.”  
  
“That should honestly be the least of your worry.” He reasoned out. “Which one?” He asked, all of a sudden referring to the watches in front of us.  
  
“That one.” I said pointing at the silver accented with black _Rolex._  
  
“Thanks.” He thanked as he took the said watch out and wore it.  
  
We went back to the bed, I sat down while he stood in front of me. He cupped my face with his hands.  
  
“Go back you sleep, you barely slept.” He suggested.  
  
“Okay.” I agreed as I was actually still very sleepy.  
  
“When you’re hungry, check the fridge. I already had food delivered earlier so you’ll have something to eat.”  
  
I smiled at his thoughtfulness.  
  
“Why are you so sweet?”  
  
He laughed.  
  
“Well, I have to try to be the best boyfriend for the best girlfriend in the world.”  
  
I couldn’t help but smile once more as I stood and went for another hug. I felt him lean his head against mine right away.  
  
“Be careful. Don’t hurt yourself while performing.”  
  
“Yes ma’am.”  
  
“And…” I trailed off as I hesitated whether to tell him or not. “And try not to be so hot. You’re going to give your fans a heart attack.”  
  
He smirked.  
  
“But that’s what I’m good at baby. I can’t help it.” He told me, obviously amused. “Comes out naturally.”  
  
I pinched his side before I was able to stop myself.  
  
“Awww!” He exclaimed, leaning away from, his hands still around me. “I thought you said not to get hurt?” He ranted.  
  
I smiled widely at his childish reaction. Gosh, I hate how even his playful ways seemed to get me all the time.

“I’m sorry?” I apologized trying to stifle a laugh.  
  
He didn’t reply and kissed me all of a sudden instead. His lips softly grazed against mine and it was just amazing how his mouth can go from being gentle to needy to aggressive and intruding at times. Though his kiss remained soft as of the moment, it never failed to give me the butterflies.  
  
“See you later baby.” He bid, giving my cheek one last caress before finally walking towards the door.  
  
The moment he closed the door behind him, I climbed on the bed ready to get more sleep. I loved, just loved how his bed, the pillow, the blanket…the linen smelled like him. It’s a bit odd being in his house alone like this but I was too sleepy to start thinking about anything at the moment.  
  
***  
  
1:43PM  
  
I just finished taking a shower and went to the third closet on the left to pull out the powder blue dress I haven’t worn the last time I was here. Unlike the rust colored one I wore when his mother was here, this one was shorter. It was a knee leveled one with short sleeves and with very tiny white heart patterns, they’re so small they’d look like dots from afar.  
  
After getting dressed, I went to look for my phone which I just realized I hadn’t really checked since this morning. I checked and there were three sns message notifications which happened to be from him. I tapped on the _notif_ and saw a screenshot of an old _selca_ from my Instagram. It was taken on my second week in Korea and the first time I went up at the old hiking place. I took it where I first met him.  
  
Right below the photo was another message from him.  
  
Byun:  
 ** _Wow. My baby’s so pretty._**   
12:02PM  
  
Byun:  
 ** _I am such a lucky man._**  
12:03PM  
  
The corner of my lips automatically turned upward as I read his message over and over again.  
  
Me:  
 ** _Oh my god stop stalking me._**  
02:16PM  
  
I knew he wouldn’t be able to reply immediately since he might be getting ready for the concert now so I decided to blow dry my hair. I did it for about more or less twenty minutes. I went back to his bed where my purse was so I could take out my make-up kit when I saw my phone lit up.  
  
Byun:  
 ** _May I remind you that I have the right to stalk you, baby._**  
02:48PM  
  
Smiling like a teenager, I started to type in my reply but stopped when I received three more notifications.  
  
 _Byun sent a photo  
Byun sent a photo  
Byun sent a photo_  
  
My eyes grew big as I hadn’t seen the photos he sent me this time. The first time was taken up in the hiking place. It was a candid shot of me with my eyes closed, facing the sunset view. Wait, this was when we were up there the second time around? _How was he able to take a photo of me?_  
  
The second one was the one when I was sleeping leaning next to the trunk of the tree. This was when we decided to meet each other up there too. I remembered waiting for him and falling asleep at that time then woke up with his face very close to mine.  
  
The last one was taken in the cabin. He was right beside me but his face wasn’t shown in the photo. We were in front of the fireplace and again, it seemed like I was sound asleep, my head resting against his chest.  
  
 _So, he’s got a lot of stolen photos of me in his phone and I didn’t have any idea?_  
  
Me:  
 ** _What? Don’t you know it’s a crime to take someone’s photo without their consent? Should I file a police report about this?_**  
2:52PM  
  
By the time I sent the message, I was already smiling widely.  
  
Byun:  
 ** _Oh? Then I guess I should file a report about you STEALING my heart?_**  
2:53PM  
  
 _Oh my god._ I burst out laughing.    
  
Me:  
 ** _That’s so lame, you’re aware of that right?_**  
2:54PM  
  
Byun:  
 ** _Hahaha Love you Baby._**  
 _2:55PM_  
   
I sent him a giant heart emoji trying my best to stop myself from being all giggly. It’s just so amazing how he could make me feel like a woman and a teenager at the same time.  
  
We talked for a little bit before he told me that he needed to keep his phone away since he’d be surrounded by several stylist to prepare for the concert. His last message was telling me to wait for him in his house. Well, I don’t have much choice since I couldn’t just casually walk outside of a celebrity’s house.  
  
***  
  
7:30PM  
  
I was certain his concert was already done by this time but he hadn’t sent me a single message yet. I waited for a little more, itching to check my phone from time to time but none came. I was on my way down to the living room when my phone rang.  
  
“Baek.” I said right after I answered the call.  
  
“Hey Baby.” He sounded a bit hesitant. “There’s a problem.”  
  
“What’s the matter?”  
  
“The whole team will go out for dinner, I might have to go with them.”  
  
“Oh.” I uttered realizing he wouldn’t be able to drive me home. “It’s fine. I can just go and head to the station, I think I can still catch the last trip…” I trailed off when I heard him.  
  
“No baby, it’s late.” He protested. “Can you just stay for one more night? I’ll drive you home tomorrow morning.”  
  
“But you’re going to Paris tomorrow.” I reminded him.  
  
The thought of him flying to Paris with Ara bothered me.  
  
“Yes but I still have time to take you home.” He reasoned out. “The flight will be in the afternoon anyway.”  
  
“Baek, don’t exhaust yourself too much for me. I can take care of myself.” I insisted because I didn’t really like how he’s tiring himself out just to make room for me.  
  
The line went silent and I kind of had the feeling that I might have offended him.  
  
“Baek…”  
  
“All I ever want is to make sure you’re safe.” He replied, his voice not as endearing as before. “But okay, if that’s what you want, I’ll call Mr. Yoo to drive you to the station.”  
  
I didn’t really feel at ease about how this conversation had turn out.  
  
“Baek, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to…”  
  
“No, it’s fine. Just wait for Mr. Yoo.” He replied in a dismissive tone.  
  
I sighed.  
  
“Okay.”  
  
“Okay.” I heard him say.  
  
I waited for him for a couple of second to say something else but none came so I hesitantly ended the call.  
  
I sat on the couch and started to blame myself. He must’ve been really tired and all he wanted to do was to make time for me but instead of appreciating his efforts, I kind of made him feel being pushed away. Of course, he wouldn’t feel good about how I made it seem.  
  
 _Gosh, this is hard._  
I ended up sighing once more.  
I was staring at my phone for the next few minutes wanting to send him a message but I just couldn’t get myself to do it.  
  
Then I heard the door. I thought of how Mr. Yoo but wasn’t it too soon? I stood on my feet and didn’t have the time to check who it was when I saw someone just appeared on the living room.  
  
Definitely not Mr. Yoo but Ara.  
 _Kim Ara._  
  
***  
  
We both started at each other, obviously surprised and wasn’t expecting each other’s presence here. She was beautifully donned in a black black with an elegant maroon overcoat. Her hair was tied in a neat ponytail. Again, she looked so sophisticated. She was holding a bouquet of flowers which I assumed would be for Baekhyun.

I wanted to ask her what was she doing here but she was able to speak first.  
  
“Oh, I didn’t expect to see you here Hae Won.”  
  
I instantly felt annoyed at how she made it seem like I was the one who didn’t have the right to be here.  
  
“Well, Baekhyun asked me to.” I replied trying my best not to sound sarcastic. “He’s not here by the way. Did he know you’re coming over?”

“No. I was supposed to surprise him.” She said nonchalantly and lifted the flowers. “I want to congratulate him.”  
  
I was speechless, trying to compose myself.  
  
“Where is he?” She asked as she put the flowers down on the table.  
  
“He’s having dinner with the staff.”  
  
“Oh, I see.” She replied casually. “He’s making you wait until his celebrity duties are over.”  
  
I honestly expected her to leave but she didn’t. She sat on the couch in front of me instead. I stared at her and I hate how beautiful she looked.  
  
“By the way Hae Won, Baekhyun hasn’t changed his lock yet?” She asked. “He’s still using the one he gave me before and it’s been years.” She told me. “That’s obviously how I was able to get in.”  
  
 _Why was she telling me about it in the first place?_  
  
“Why are you here Ara?” I finally managed to ask in a controlled voice.  
  
She looked a bit alarmed, puzzled in a way.  
  
“Well, I already told you. I came to surprise him.” She answered.  
  
She sounded so innocent. She was making it seem like there wasn’t anything wrong with her presence here.  
  
“Is it okay?” I stated as I sat. “I mean you coming over at your ex-boyfriend’s house to surprise him like this when he’s obviously in a relationship now?” How I was able to deliver that question without sounding rude was an accomplishment.  
  
She looked offended for a second but let out of a smile.  
  
“I understand how you feel so entitled.” She said with a hint of sarcasm in her tone.  “I can’t blame you though. You’re his girlfriend now and you probably don’t like seeing me here.” She tilted her head down. “But I guess you obviously know that I can’t give Baekhyun up.”  
  
I gulped, still trying to contain the anger building up inside me.  
  
“Your relationship ended years ago. I don’t understand why you’re doing this all of a sudden.” I trailed off to take a deep breath. “As you can see he’s fine now.”  
  
She let out of a soft laugh.  
  
“We’ll his career won’t clearly be fine if the public finds out about his relationship with you.” She reasoned out. “That’s why I’m here. That’s why I came back. I’m here to make sure that he wouldn’t lose what he loves and worked hard for.” She added in a matter of fact tone.  
  
She telling me how I would eventually destroy Baekhyun’s career was beyond painful. I felt a pang in my heart, a lump in my throat.  
  
“Baekhyun is a good man and when he loves you, he’ll make you feel like you’re the only thing that matters to him.” She continued. “Believe me, I know how it feels.”  
  
“So why did you even have the guts to break his heart in the first place?” I asked, not minding how rude I sounded this time.  
  
She didn’t say a word for a moment, even looked hurt. She took a deep breath.  
  
“I see he’s already told you about that.” She smirked. “But I don’t see why I have to explain myself to you Hae Won.”  
  
We met each other’s eyes. My jaw clenched, she’s so behaved, it’s irritating.  
  
“I love him.” Ara stated. “And I am going to fight for him.” The conviction in her voice was clearly evident. “So, thank you for letting him do the magazine shoot. At least we’ll have time to be together.”  
  
Her statement came like a knife, stabbing my heart.  
  
“It must be hard being you.” I heard her say. “It must be hard to just sit, watch and hear how people want me to be with him instead of someone else.”  
  
“He doesn’t love you.” I firmly stated because I didn’t know what else to say anymore.  
  
“Yes.” She agreed. “But you see that’s not how celebrity relationships work Hae won. If you want to stay on top, you gotta go do whatever it takes to please people. Baekhyun knows that since he’s been around the industry for a long time.”  
  
I was on the verge of crying already but tried my best to resist the tears in front of her.  
  
“And yes he doesn’t love me now but don’t forget how I was in your place before. I did it the past so I can make him love me again. Especially when between the both of us…I’m the one whom he clearly needs.”  
  
I watched her get up, feeling my confidence crumble.  
  
“Well…looks like it might take him a couple of hours to get home. I’ll probably get going for now.” She told me.

And as if the words I heard from her weren’t enough to break me yet…  
  
“I’ll see him tomorrow anyway.” She added emphasizing her words.  
  
I didn’t move, I was too scared or my tears would come rolling down my cheeks right away.  
  
I heard her leave her spot.  
  
“And by the way Hae won…” She said stopping a few feet away from me. “Just so you heard it from me first, I uploaded photos with Baekhyun backstage during his concert. I had to do it to make people happy since you couldn’t.”  
  
As my hands formed into fists, I felt the same thing with my heart. This was clearly this too much for me to handle. So, as soon as her footsteps faded and the door closed, I gave in to the heavy weight of my unshed tears.  
  
I cried so hard. I was so angry, frustrated and hurt at the same time. I hate how I had to endure everything she just said and I hate how affected I was right now. I hate how she was telling the truth about people liking her for Baekhyun. I hate how I felt so helpless when it comes to this whole celebrity thing. I hate how I couldn’t stop crying my heart out.  
  
I was sure my eyes have become swollen and my face have become red from crying when I heard someone’s presence.  
  
“Miss Park?”  
  
Realizing that it was Mr. Yoo, I immediately wiped my tears. I knew it wouldn’t fix the mess that I already was but I still did anyway.  
  
He looked taken aback when I turned to him.  
  
“Are you okay?” He looked a bit worried as he hesitantly walked towards me. “What did Ara do to you? I saw her car.”  
  
I couldn’t answer his questions, I was still too speechless.  
  
“I’d better call Baekhyun.” I heard him say.  
  
My heart almost skipped a bit at the mention of Baekhyun’s name.  
  
“No Mr. Yoo.” I protested as I stood and stopped him by holding his arm. “Don’t tell him. Not this one. Please.” I begged.  
  
“But Miss Park…”  
  
“Please. I’ll tell him I promise.” I said, trying to stop myself from sobbing. “Now now. Please.”  
  
Mr. Yoo looked really worried about me right now. I get the feeling that he wanted to ask more about the situation but didn’t.  
  
“Shall I go take you to the station?” He asked, thankfully changing the topic.  
  
I moved my head sideways.  
  
“I’ll just wait for him here.” I answered. “I’ll let him take me home tomorrow morning.”  
  
“Okay Miss Park.” He agreed. “Should I tell him you’ll wait for him here instead?”  
  
I replied by moving my head sideways again.  
  
He nodded.  
  
“At least the food I bought.” He stated.  
  
It was just then I noticed the paper bag on the table.  
  
“Thanks Mr. Yoo.”  
  
“I’ll go ahead now. Will you be fine?”  
  
I nodded.  
  
“If there’s anything I could do to help, please tell me.” He answered as he took my phone on the table probably to enter his number. “I know how much you mean to Baekhyun and I want to protect you too. He’s like a younger brother to me and I will protect everything and everyone that’s precious to him.”  
  
I swear, he was making me cry more.  
  
“Thank you Mr. Yoo.” I barely replied with a steady voice.  
  
I got a one last nod from him before he left.  
  
I looked around the empty house, not really knowing what to do next exactly.  
  
***  
  
10:20PM  
  
I changed to my pajamas and went to lie on his bed. I turned off the lights leaving the bedside lamp on. My eyes were puffy from crying and I didn’t want him to see it later. The last thing I would want him to do was worry about me.  
  
I checked my phone and saw a message from him.  
  
Byun:  
 ** _Are you home now? Please tell me when you are._**  
09:45PM  
  
I immediately felt guilty. Knowing how he sounded offended by what I said a while ago but texting me now. I did not reply. I didn’t want to lie nor tell him I was waiting for him. I put my phone back on the bedside table. I closed my eyes hoping I’d forget everything that happened today.  
  
***  
  
I had obviously fallen asleep because I didn’t hear him got in. He was sitting right next to me on the bed, his removing the locks of hair from my face before his thumb caressed my cheek. He didn’t say anything and I just had to right the urge to open my eyes and hug him.

When he walked away probably to get changed, it was just when I opened my eyes. I saw him taking his watch off before going to the bathroom.  
  
I checked the digital clock on the table and it said 10:53PM.  
  
About fifteen minutes after, he went back to the bed. He climbed on his side of the bed, his freshly showered scent filling my sense right away. I was facing the other way and I felt him slide his arm around my waist to hold me close to him.  
  
“Thank God you’re still here.” He said gently, resting his chin on my shoulder.  
  
I swear, nothing comforts me better than his presence. I was so thankful he’s right beside me right now. I couldn’t imagine having to go through the night without him. I’d be drowning in my own thoughts, _overthinking_.  
  
“I’m sorry about while ago.” He added. “And I’m sorry for making you wait.”  
  
My heart sank as I closed my eyes, biting my lip to resist my tears.  
  
Please dear heart…  
  
  
  
 _you have to be strong._  
  
  
   
  
~♥~ 

 

  
  
AN: Yes, an early update for you loves. As you can see things are beginning to get complicated again for them.   
Please don't hate me. ^^


	30. Thirty

Thirty  **  
  
**~♥~   
  


  
_Forty past nine in the morning._  
  
We were inside his car, one kilometre away from the entrance of the town. I asked him to stop driving fifteen minutes ago to buy some time. I started to get anxious about him leaving again. I was leaning my head on his shoulder and was really feeling sad when he urged me to get out of the car. He opened the door for me, held my hand and took me in front of the car. He looked at me for a brief second without saying anything and I did the same thing until I couldn’t anymore and looked away.  
  
Ara’s words started to fill my thoughts once more and I couldn’t help but feel anger building up inside me. I was getting caught up with all the negative emotions when I felt his delicate fingers on my check as he made me face him.  
  
He’s got a soft expression on his face. I knew I was somehow making him worried and he confirmed it when he pulled me into a gentle hug, his arms giving me the most satisfying embrace.  
  
“What’s wrong?” I heard him ask.  
  
I bit my lip. There was always something about his gentle tone that’s making me more vulnerable. When I didn’t answer, he hugged me a bit tighter. My hands remained on my sides until I couldn’t help but hug him back.  
  
“Nothing.” I lied.  “I just…” I paused as I suddenly felt like breaking down being inside his arms right now. “I just really don’t like missing you that’s all.”  
  
I heard him chuckle.  
  
“Oh I like it when you miss me.” He said.  
  
I immediately leaned away from him and wondered about the formation of a playful smile on his lips.  
  
“Are you pouting at me right now?” He asked, already teasing me obviously.  
  
_Oh my god. I was._ I was pouting unconsciously and I was too frustrated to notice. I panicked a bit, I didn’t know why but I guess I wasn’t used to act this away around him yet. Or do I even act this way around someone at all? No, I guess not. _Just him, he would always be an exception. Probably._  
  
I suddenly straightened my posture and tilted my head down.  
  
“No.” I denied.

My cheeks heating, embarrassed at the absurdity of my own reasoning.  
  
He laughed as he let go of me to lean against the hood of his car then extended an arm to reach for my hand. He urged me to stand in between his legs, wrapping his hands over my shoulders. I tilted my head right when he leaned his head against mine.  
  
“I miss you already.”  
  
My heartbeat raced at his words. I closed my eyes, wanting and wishing he’d never have to leave. I wanted him to stay so bad, it’s making me really sad.  
  
“I can’t imagine how much I’ll miss you later when I drive home alone.” He added, tugging at my heartstrings.  
  
“I wish you could stay.” I muttered, my heart winning over my rationality.  
  
He sounded a bit surprised by my response, his arms loosened around me.  
  
I took a deep breath as I broke myself free from his embrace. He didn’t say anything but observed me when I turned to face him. There was an absolute look of regret on his face. So, I momentarily looked down trying to distract my emotions because I was pretty sure my tears were ready to make their presence known anytime from now. But then again, I was also aware that there was no use pretending in front of him. So, after a brief second, I leaned closer as I slid my hands inside his jacket and wound them around his waist, hugging him. I leaned my head against his chest and was instantly comforted by the beating of his heart.  
  
“I don’t want you to go Baek.” I said, my voice filled with affection and I wasn’t surprised at how clingy I sounded. “I wish I told you not to go earlier.” I added, closing my eyes in the process.  
  
He remained silent for a couple of seconds before I felt him hug me back.  
  
“Should I just stay?”  He sounded sad and wistful at the same time.  
  
_He couldn’t. We both knew this._

I filled my lungs with air as I hugged him tighter.  
  
“Come back to me.” I said without a second thought.  
  
“I will.” He answered right away before planting a kiss on my head. “Always.”  
  
The melancholic atmosphere brought an undeniable pang in my heart.  
  
“I will always come back to you.” He added in a soothing voice.  
  
I could only close my eyes and satisfy my senses with everything his presence was giving me now. For I knew so well that moments after he’s gone, I’d have to deal with separation anxiety all alone.  
  
***  
  
His flight was at four in the afternoon and he called and talked to me briefly right before he departed. I saw a few of his airport photos on the internet. It was going to be a long flight for him and I hope he gets to rest well before the shoot. The shoot, which brought me to think of Kim Ara but then I immediately suspended the thought and made my way to the flower shop to help Aunt Sunny.

I called my parents that night and we talked about everything I’ve been doing in Korea, except my relationship with Baekhyun of course. The inevitable question of my return to Australia was also brought up. I told my mom, since she was really the one who actively threw the question every time, to give me a few months more. We talked for about an hour before we ended the call.  
  
I missed them, of course I do. But leaving Korea now wasn’t something I have in mind at the moment. I knew I had to go back and it was only a matter of when.  
  
***  
  
Baekhyun and I communicated constantly the whole time he was in Paris. The seven-hour time difference between Seoul and Paris kind of made it hard for us to call each other but he sent me messages from time to time. He also sent me his different looks for the photo shoot as well as the beautiful locations.  
  
_“I wish you were here.”  
“This place would be perfect if you’re right beside me.”  
“I’m going to take you here someday.”_  
  
His sweet captions never failed to make me smile. And I would tell him how much I hate him for making me miss him more.

  
Me:  
**_Are there a lot of beautiful women there?_**  
10:36PM  
  
Byun:  
**_Well, yeah but the most beautiful is in Korea right now._**  
10:40PM  
  
I instantly let out of a soft laugh upon reading his reply.  


Me:  
**_You’re such a flirt Baekhyun._**  
10:41PM  
  
Byun:  
**_Exclusively for you._**  
10:42PM  
  
  
_My god, I hate him._  
  
***  
  
On his last night there, he told me that he was going to have dinner with the whole team. I instantly knew that Ara was going to be there and so was everyone. I guess, I didn’t have to worry. I also trust Baekhyun so there wasn’t going to be any problem with it.  
  
***  
_Saturday._  
  
I woke up the next morning and the first thing I did was check my phone but there were no messages from him. It should be around two in the morning there.  
  
_Isn’t he back at his hotel room yet?_ I wondered.  
  
I decided to call him but he didn’t answer and I thought that he might have already fallen asleep so I didn’t try calling him again.  
  
***  
  
08:45AM  
  
We just finished eating breakfast at home. Uncle Jin woo was at work and Aunt Sunny went to the flower shop ten minutes ago. So, it was just Ji Hye and I who were left in the kitchen. Then I noticed something weird about her. She kept looking at me and whenever I turned to face her, she would look away.  
  
“Is something wrong Ji Hye?” I asked her out of curiosity.  
  
I saw her bit her lower lip and suddenly seemed like crying.  
  
“Hey, what’s the matter?” I asked more, alarmed by the look on her face.  
  
I was sure that she was about to cry, I could see her tears pooling in her eyes.  
  
“Are you not feeling well?” I couldn’t help but worry.  
  
I noticed that she had her phone in her hand and she was gripping it. I didn’t know why but seeing her this way kind of scared me.  
  
“Eonnie…” She muttered but paused right away.  
  
“What is it Ji Hye?  
  
_Please, let this be not about Baekhyun._  
  
Then she started crying. Her tears rolling down her cheeks before she ran away. I spaced out a bit, _what was it that she was trying to tell me but couldn’t?_  
  
_Could it really be about Baekhyun?_  
  
I washed the dishes and I couldn’t help but be bothered by Ji Hye’s behaviour. So, right after dealing with everything in the kitchen, I went back to my room and checked on my phone, which was on my bed, right away.  
  
**Two Missed Calls from Baekhyun.  
Four Messages from Baekhyun.**  
  
_What was going on?_  
  
I checked on his messages first.  
  
Byun:  
**_I’m not sure if you’ve already seen it but if you did, please let me explain._**  
07:55AM  
  
Byun:  
**_Hear me out first._**  
08:10AM  
  
Byun:  
**_Hae Won…_**  
08:11AM  
  
Byun:  
**_Please call me when you see this._**  
8:20AM  
  
_I’ve already seen what?_ I got so confused and worried at the same time. This was totally making me feel paranoid. I closed my messaging app and went to an internet search portal. My fingers were slightly trembling as I typed in Baekhyun’s name on the search bar. And in a matter of seconds, I found the answer to my question. I found out what brought tears to Ji Hye’s eyes. I found out why Baekhyun wanted to talk to me.  
  
There were several recent articles about Baekhyun in Paris and it wasn’t about the Photo Shoot. Right next to his name was Ara’s. My fingers continued to tremble as I scrolled down and finally read the headlines.  
  
_Baekhyun and Ara’s Romantic Trip to Paris.  
Baekhyun and Ara spotted.  
Can’t help but Fall in Love in Paris: Baekhyun and Ara.  
Seems like Baekhyun and Ara can’t keep it a secret anymore. _  
  
All the headlines had identical photos that made my knees really weak and gave that familiar sinking feeling right behind my chest.  
  
The photo was a stolen shot of Baekhyun and Ara outside of what seemed to be a restaurant. The photo was zoomed in and was already a bit pixelated but everyone who knew them would recognize it’s them. They were standing facing each other. No, they weren’t just standing, they were too close to be just standing. In fact, Ara was tip toeing… _kissing him.  
  
It was as if my heart stopped beating for a moment as my blood ran cold.  
  
What did I just see?  
Baekhyun and Ara…_  
  
“No.” I muttered, in denial as I scrolled down the page. “No, no no…” I kept shaking my head sideways. “This can’t be real.”  
  
My brain was cramming, unable to fully process everything right now.  
  
“No.” I said once more as I continued to check on the other articles.  
  
_“…Baekhyun and Ara were spotted being cozy in the most Romantic place on Earth…”_

I suddenly felt dizzy, I didn’t know what to do. I spaced out unable to think of anything afterwards. My thoughts were a mess. Then my phone, for some reasons, had somehow become so heavy for me that I had to slowly put it down.  
  
I couldn’t breathe properly as my weakened knees caused me to sit on the bed as well. My room wasn’t that small nor that spacious but I suddenly started to feel suffocated, I brought a hand to my chest.  
  
_What is happening to me?_  
  
I wanted to cry but for some unexplainable reasons, there weren’t any tears in my eyes. This is scary. This isn’t how I usually react to things similar to this one. I couldn’t even feel a single tear forming in my eyes. I just couldn’t. I bit my lower lip as I closed my eyes for a few seconds.  
  
_This is insane. Did I really just see them kissing?_  
  
I was so aware of the growing void right behind my chest and it was slowly eating me inside. The same void I felt that day when I broke up with him.  
  
_This is almost unbearable._  
  
_No, Baekhyun just didn’t…_  
  
There was a part of me trying to justify things, trying to reason me out of this but the other part was just too perturbed by what I just learned. I blinked my eyes a couple of times and I forced my head to think properly but I still couldn’t. I kept spacing out until I felt my fingers slightly tremble.  
  
I laid on my back and stared at the ceiling blankly for a couple of minutes before I closed my eyes only to think about everything I saw on the internet.  
  
_That kiss._  
  
_Oh, god no._ _Please I don’t wanna think about it._  
  
I opened my eyes and immediately got off the bed. I went to the bathroom, stood in front of the sink before washing my face. I did it a few times, desperate to get rid of the image in my head.  
  
With water dripping down my face, I stared in the mirror.  
  
I had a feeling something was going to happen in Paris but everything seemed to go well, I had totally forgotten about what Ara might do.  
  
_But now, this? How did it happen?_  
  
***  
  
I went back to my bed hoping to finally get back to my senses when I heard my phone beeped. I gazed at it for a good minute, debating whether to read it or not, before I stretched an arm to grab it.  
  
Byun:  
**_I’m going to head back to Korea now. I’ll drive to your house right away._**  
09:17AM

Reading his message somehow made me snap out of my incoherent thoughts for the past minutes. He was going back to Korea at this time? As far as I knew, his flight back should be at two in the afternoon but he’s going back now. It should be around two in the morning there by now.  
  
I also didn’t know what to do with this information. He was going to see me right away and I couldn’t even digest everything I have seen and read on the news yet.  
  
I was certain, I won’t be able to reply to his message properly at this state, so I put my phone down again. I looked around and felt that sinking feeling again, I felt like drowning and it’s making me so anxious right now. Everything was seemingly closing in, and I definitely had to get out of here.  
  
I ran out of the house, passed by the flower shop until I was out in the streets and ran as fast as I could. The wind was blowing hard, making my hair dance along with it. I might look crazy right now, running dodging everyone I pass by. I didn’t know where I was going exactly until I turn right and reached an unoccupied street. I stopped in the middle of the road.  
  
I took a deep breath, desperate to fill my lungs with air.MY mind was blank for a couple of seconds until the wind blew, the icy feeling almost felt like knives against my exposed skin.  
  
Then, everything flooded my thoughts once more. From every word Ara told me that night to the photos I’ve seen on the internet, Ji hye crying, Baekhyun going back to Korea right away. The possible aftereffects of the scandal. Everything.  
  
My tears, as if finally deciding to make their presence know, unstoppably rolled down my cheeks. I started to cry so hard it was so hard for me to keep quiet. And when I couldn’t anymore, I started bawling. Feeling helpless, I brought my hands to cover my face as I bent my legs.  
  
I was so hurt, no maybe hurt was even an understatement. The pain I was feeling was too overwhelming, I couldn’t even bring myself to think about him.  
  
I cried my heart out until I couldn’t anymore.  
I slowly stood and wiped my tear stained cheeks.  
  
_“My god Park Hae Won, get your shit together.”_  
  
  
***

At lunch time, all four of us were there and Ji Hye and I avoided eye contact most of the time which I was pretty sure Aunt Sunny and Uncle Jin Woo noticed. I didn’t have much appetite for food as well so I ended up finishing early, excusing myself to go back to my room.  
  
I stayed away from my phone the time because I knew where I would go. I would end up checking the internet and torture myself once more with what I was about to find related to Baekhyun, Ara and Paris. It was hard trying to act normal in front of everyone in the house, especially with my cousin.  Her eyes were also a bit puffy and I just knew why she cried. I also couldn’t show any form of weakness in front of her, afraid that she might breakdown and cry in front of her parents. The last thing I would want to happen was Auntie finding about the scandal.  
  
_No. Not now. I just couldn’t deal with another issue right now.  
I couldn’t promise just how long I’d be able to keep a straight face and hold everything in. _

  
***  
  
6:19PM  
  
I was at the shop the whole afternoon, helping out Auntie. I desperately needed to distract myself and I didn’t know what else to do aside from it. I kept spacing out though the entire time, I even gave a wrong order a couple of times which led Auntie to ask me if I was indeed feeling well. I lied, telling her that I was fine and it was probably because I didn’t get enough sleep last night. She told me to go back inside the house to take a rest but I insisted to stay until I literally broke a whole vase of roses.  
  
“Oh my god Auntie, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Let me fix this.” I panicked, realizing what I just did.  
  
“Hae Won, it’s fine. Just go ahead, I’ll take care of it.” She replied as she attempted to help me out.  
  
I, on the other hand, hurriedly picked a piece of the broken vase without giving it much thought and ended up wounding myself with it. I winced at the pain and rattled more when I saw blood dripping my finger.  
  
_Crap._  
  
“No Auntie.” I protested politely as I tried to hide what happened to my finger. “I’ll be the one to clean this up. It’s my fault. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me today.” I rambled, ignoring the first wound I had until I got the second one.  
  
“Hae Won.” I heard Auntie called, probably noticing how I already hurt myself, but I ignored her knowing she’d end up asking me to go inside again.  
  
“Auntie I’m fine.” I stood as I noticed two of my fingers bleeding already. “Let me just go get band aids for these.” I reasoned out breathlessly and was walking towards the cabinet when Auntie spoke once more.  
  
“Someone’s here.” She informed me and I stopped on my feet right away.  
  
_I instantly felt nervous as I indeed felt somebody else’s presence inside the shop._  
  
I slowly turned around to face the entrance of the shop and almost held my breath when I found him standing a few feet away from me. I swallowed, meeting his eyes right after he removed his bucket hat. When his eyes left mine, I saw how his attention fell to my bleeding hand.  
  
_I had totally forgotten about him coming here._  
  
“B-baekhyun.” Aunt Sunny said, breaking the silence between us.  
  
Snapping out of my thoughts, I rattled as I turned around to proceed looking for band aids, which I couldn’t really find.  
  
“Mrs. Lee, is it okay if I take her out?” I heard Baekhyun asking her permission.  
  
My heartbeat raced as I anticipated for Auntie’s answer. For some reasons, I was hoping for her to say no since I wasn’t really sure if I was ready to talk to him.  
  
“Uh, yes. Of course, Baekhyun.” She answered hesitantly.  
  
I tilted my head down in defeat. I didn’t glance at him nor even moved a muscle until I felt him stand right behind me. I didn’t say anything though I knew that he was waiting for me to speak and face him.  
  
“Let me help you with that.” He offered as he moved closer and attempted to check my bleeding hand.  
  
“No.” I protested quickly, stepping a foot away from him. “I have to clean the mess I made first. Why don’t you just go wait for me in the car?” I added, avoiding any eye contact as I walked away to find something to use to clean the floor.  
  
I heard him sigh gloomily right where he was standing.  
  
“Hae Won.” Aunt Sunny intercepted. “Leave it.” There was an absolute demand in her tone, causing me to immediately wonder why.  
  
I turned to her and found her attention glued on the Television where the news about Baekhyun and Ara was currently airing. The announcer’s voice filling the silence inside the shop.

 _I felt my entire body tensed._  
  
“You two obviously need to talk.” She added as she looked at Baekhyun before her eyes met mine.  
  
_Great. I hoped Aunt Sunny wouldn’t find out about this but who am I kidding really?_  
  
When I finally had the courage to look at Baekhyun, his attention was fixed on the TV screen as well.  
His jaw clenching, his hands forming into fists.  
  
***  
  
It wasn’t so dark yet but the streets were almost empty considering we were in the countryside. We were inside his car across the flower shop. He just finished helping me out with my hand using the first aid kit he had with him in his car. I knew that he noticed how I had been avoiding his eyes the whole time.

I had my hands on my lap as the uncomfortable silence grew between us. I heard him take a deep breath a few times but I just still couldn’t bring myself to look at him.  
  
Then, he took my injured hand and held it gently. That was the only time I was able to hold his gaze. It was just then I noticed the desperation on his face. He had been meaning to talk to be all this time but I made him feel so unwelcomed.  
  
_But… I couldn’t help it_. Every time I looked at him, the photo of him and Ara was all I could think about.  
  
“Please get me out of here.” I told him as I removed my hand from him and darted my attention outside.  

“Where do you want to go?” He asked, sounding a bit cautious.  
  
“I don’t know. Seoul? Anywhere. I don’t care.” I answered, surprised at how bluntly it sounded.    
  
I didn’t hear any word from him until he revved his engine on.  
  
In a matter of a few seconds, we were driving away from the town.  
  
***  
  
9:43PM  
  
We finally reached Seoul and seeing the streets alive and filled with people made me realized that it was a mistake asking him to take me here. So, I asked him to take me somewhere quiet and he did. He took me to an old viewing place. It was a hill overlooking the city lights and the famous Han River. Considering that the place was old, it was understandable that there weren’t anyone else aside from us.  
  
When we got off his car, he immediately offered me his padded jacket. I took it from him and wore it on my own before he could even offer to drape it around my shoulders. I also walked ahead of him and stopped right before the railings.  
  
The view was beautiful. The air was fresh. Just what I needed right now. I inhaled and filled my lungs with air. Too bad, all this overwhelming frustration inside would ruin everything.  
  
“Baby…” He hesitated. “I…”  
  
“What happened Baekhyun?” I finally asked him not paying him a single glance, cutting him off. “How did you two end up being alone?” I paused, this time to look at him. “What happened to everyone else?”  
  
I saw his shoulders slumped after my consecutive questions.  
  
“We were with everyone that night but…” He started, trailing off as he walked closer to me. “After eating, I excused myself from everyone and went to the bathroom and when I came back, everyone was gone. She was the only one left.”  
  
“I see…” I trailed off as that sinking feeling right behind my chest started to bother me. “You had to stay and keep her company.” I added and I was sure my statement sounded a bit accusing.  
  
“No.” He moved his head sideways. “No, of course that wasn’t my intention. I was about to go and leave her but then she had a few glasses of wine and certainly couldn’t go home by herself.”  
  
I gulped, looking away and darting my attention to the view in front of us. I didn’t feel good having this conversation right now. I was getting angry all of a sudden I was certain I’d give in to my emotions any moment from now.  
  
“Listen Baby, I didn’t expect that she was going to do it.” He elaborated. “She just kissed me all of a sudden and I…” He trailed off, shaking his head sideways.  
  
I was looking at him, undeniably pleased.  
  
“Damn it! This is insane.” He hissed, his jaw clenching. “I’m sorry. I should’ve been more careful.” He apologized in a low voice.  
  
_I knew this was Ara’s plan. But for some reasons, I couldn’t stop venting my anger on him._  
  
“Everyone will think that you’re in a relationship with her.” I replied, absent minded. “And I guess it won’t matter if she was the one who kissed you.” I sighed, both because of pain and frustration.  “Have you even seen or read the news about you two?”  
  
He did not answer but looked at me intently before looking down.  
  
“They said that you two are together and that you finally couldn’t keep your relationship a secret any longer.” I let out of a sigh of irritation. “And I can’t do anything else but read them.”  
  
I saw how afflicted he looked after what I said.  
  
“Tell me what I have to do to make you feel better.” He asked, sounding and looking desperate.  
  
I could feel his sincerity but even his soothing voice couldn’t console nor pacify me right now.  
  
“Nothing.” I muttered, blinking as if trying to clear my vision which had somehow become blurry all of a sudden.  
  
I saw him attempt to come closer to hug me but I stepped away.

“I don’t think there’s anything you can do Baek.” I struggled to keep a steady voice.  
  
I heard him took a deep breath as he lifted both of his hands to his head before turning away and rested his hands on the rails.  
  
He was mad. I knew he was. I watched how his grip tightened on the railings.  
  
_It was disheartening that we both couldn’t do anything about this._  
  
“Your world is just too big Baekhyun. I honestly don’t know where to stand anymore.” I told him, unable to keep myself from being honest.  
  
As if everything went in slow motion, I saw him turn to me.  
I was sure the pain in his eyes would kill me if it wasn’t because of the bucket hat.  
  
_I didn’t want to do this any further. I wasn’t ready to hear any of this. Why did I even ask him to take me here? I must be out of my mind._  
  
Then without a word, I turned around and started to walk away from him.  
But then I was only three steps away when he called me.  
  
“Hae Won…” I heard him from behind. “Please I’m sorry.” His voice was so loud yet pleading in a way.   
  
The lump in my throat stopped me from replying and walking ahead. I wanted nothing else but to get out of here but my legs were frozen at the sound of his voice. I heard him walked towards my spot but stopped behind me.  
  
“I know this is entirely my fault. I know you’re angry and I’ve hurt you.” Remorse was evident in his tone. “And yes maybe you’re right, maybe there’s nothing I can do to make you feel better right now but at least be mad at me. Just…” He paused to take a deep breath. “Just don’t go like this.”  
  
I bit my lip, trying my best not to cry since I realized that the tears pooling my eyes was what made my vision a bit blurry. I didn’t move, the last thing I wanted to do was face him because it’d surely cause me to breakdown. And I just had to fight the urge to do it more when he held my hand from behind.  
  
“Don’t leave.” His voice was above a whisper.  
  
I felt his head rest against mine.  
  
_Oh my god. How could reality be too cruel on the both of us?_  
  
After a brief second, I finally mustered the courage to speak.  
  
“I’m not…” I closed my eyes, finally letting my tears go. “I’m not breaking up with you Baekhyun.” I added in a controlled voice.  
  
He gave my hand a gentle squeeze.  
  
“But for now…” I lifted my other hand to wipe my cheek. “Don’t follow me.” I instructed as I tried to remove my hand from his but he refused to let it go.  
  
“Hae Won…” He sounded so tired.  
  
“I promise…” I paused, trying to steady my voice.  “I’ll come home to you later.” I assured, meaning every word the came out of my mouth.  
  
_A brief silence._ I heard him take heavy breaths, probably contemplating whether to let me go or not.  
  
“Please be safe.” I heard him say before he finally let go of my hand.  
  
As soon as my hand was free, I walked back to his car to get my purse.  
  
_I didn’t look back once._  
  
  
***  
  
A crowd.  
  
I thought a crowded place was all I needed at the moment. I took a cab and ask the driver to take me to a famous hang out place in the area. When I got there, I walked down the street full of people even at this time. There were several cafes alongside the road, different music blasting from the stores. There were groups of people everywhere. There were also numerous couples holding each other’s hands while they walked. They looked so happy being able to act normally in public.  
  
_I guess being here was a bad idea._  
  
I went ahead and tried to look for a not so occupied café and when I found one, I walked inside tried to order for something to eat at the counter. But then when I was about to give the cashier my order, my eyes darted to the wall mounted TV screen. It currently had Baekhyun and Ara’s old photos following the news about what happened in Paris.  
  
_Gosh, this is torture._ Anger building up inside me again.  
  
The cashier caught my attention and asked for my order once more but I suddenly didn’t know what to say. I opened my mouth but no words came out.  
  
“Woah! Ara and Baekhyun got back together?!” I heard one person behind me exclaimed.  
“Just about time. It’s obvious their still into each other anyway.”  
  
_I swallowed. This is too much._ I was so triggered, I even felt like telling them to shut up.  And I knew that causing a scene would be a mistake and would only make matters worse, so without a word, I turned around and started to walk out of the café.  
  
***  
  
I walked and walked until my legs were already sore. I haven’t eaten anything but I had totally lost appetite. I didn’t even wanna eat anymore. I didn’t even know where to go nor where I was.  
  
_Will I be able to survive this night?_  
_All I wanted to do is to forget about it even for a short time.  
Why is it so hard to do?_  
  
I continued to walk aimlessly until I reached an unpopulated area. A particular place caught my attention. There were only a few customers inside, so I got in and occupied the spot in the corner. I looked around and saw a couple happily drinking together. The table on my right was occupied by three women who were also drinking. They seemed to have a lot of fun.  
  
Everyone was pretty much enjoying the night by drinking.  
  
***  
  
11:34PM  
  
I couldn’t believe I just finished two bottles of _soju_ all by myself. Never in my life had I imagined getting myself drunk alone like this.  
  
_But I guess, when you saw a leaked photo of your celebrity boyfriend lip-locking with his ex in Paris, whom everyone seems to love, you’d be up for stupid things like this._  
  
My head was spinning when I walked out of the place and I had to try my hardest to keep my balance or I’ll end up kissing the ground.  
  
_That would be too embarrassing._  
  
_“My god, I hate being drunk._ ” I hissed as I grabbed my head for the sudden migraine.  
  
Then I stopped when I suddenly noticed how it had gotten so cold. I looked up the sky and got amazed by the seeming white pearls from the skies.  
  
_It’s snowing._  
  
“It’s snowing and all I could think is Baekhyun.” I heard myself say as I smirked.  
  
I shook my head, as if it would dismiss every thought I have of him, before I continued to take my way out of the alley.  
  
_Thirty minutes later._  
  
For some miracle, I was able to successfully and safely take myself at the bus stop. My nose kind of already felt stuffed and I’m pretty sure my cheeks were already so red. The sudden headache I acquired wasn’t helping too. It was so cold and it almost felt like my feet were too lazy to even move. I kept pulling the sleeves of his padded jacket, I was still wearing, down to cover my already freezing hands.  There were still people passing by and they seem to double in number because of my unreasonably blurry vision.  
  
_My god Park Hae Won, I can’t believe you drank more than you could handle.  
The voice in my head, sounded drunk too.  
  
Now, where do I go? _I had the guts to ask myself as I struggled to take my phone out from my purse to try my luck with directions but who was I kidding? I couldn’t even recognize where north was right now.  
  
_This is hopeless, I thought. I couldn’t even think straight to come up with a solution._

I stayed on the same spot for the next ten minutes hoping to get rid of the dizziness but it didn’t go away. I closed my eyes wanting to concentrate but I heard two women joining me. They were talking but I couldn’t make out of anything they were conversing about. I didn’t mind them, ignored their giggles and exaggerated expressions until I heard _Kim Ara’s_ name.  
  
“Ugh that Bitch!” I yelled as I finally opened my eyes.  
  
I turned to their direction right away and they looked very surprised by what I just did. I could feel myself glaring at them until they left.  
  
I was suddenly so angry again. I felt like screaming. I hate how no matter where I went, someone always mentioned her name. Even when I closed my eyes, my thoughts were filled by everything she told me that night. Worse, the thing that happened in Paris.  
  
_I didn’t wanna be here right now. I wanted to leave Korea right at the very moment._  
I couldn’t stand being here anymore.  
  
So, without having a second thought, I forced myself to stand on my feet and went to grab a cab. My headache worsened the moment I was inside. I was so tired, my legs were sore and the dizziness just wouldn’t go away somehow. The aftertaste of alcohol in my tongue also made me feel like throwing up. I was certain I didn’t drink that much, or so I thought, but it felt like I reeked of alcohol and I just suddenly couldn’t stand it.  
  
_This was definitely a bad idea. I shouldn’t have left town.  
Maybe I shouldn’t have left Australia in the first place._  
  
_Ugh, my thoughts were a mess._

  
***  
  
I was sure I had fallen asleep until I heard an unfamiliar voice waking me up. I couldn’t make out of anything the owner of the voice was talking about at first. I struggled to open my eyes and finally realized that I was still inside the cab.  
  
I was alarmed for a second, totally aware of the trouble I might have gotten myself into.  
  
“Young lady, we’re here.” I heard an elder man’s voice from the driver’s seat.  
  
_So, I had really fallen asleep in the cab._  
  
“Where am I?” I asked, confused, grabbing my head once more.  
  
_My headache was still there, making me wince in pain._  
  
The elder man gave me the complete address and I almost froze at the information that I was right outside  
  
_Baekhyun’s house._  
  
“Why did you take me here?” I asked, absent minded.  
  
“Well, you told me to take you here. You said the address yourself when I asked you of your destination. You even said it a couple of times and forced me to memorize it before you passed out.”  
  
Drunk as I was, I still felt embarrassed. My face heating in the process. But if there was something that was stronger than my embarrassment, it would be the pounding right behind my chest.  
  
I bit my lip as the realization hit me.  
Baekhyun.  
He was probably who I was thinking about the whole time.  
_No, not probably._  
  
***  
  
_Eight minutes._  
  
I had been standing right outside his house for minutes and somehow couldn’t bring myself to press the stupid doorbell. He must have been waiting for me all this time but my foolish self didn’t even have the guts to tell him I was here.  
  
_I didn’t want to show up in front of him like this._  
_This isn’t me._  
  
It was cold. Too cold, my hands were starting to feel numb again. And the dizziness continued to keep me company. I was certain it had been almost an hour since I left the place where I drank but I wasn’t sober yet, it’s crazy.  
  
_How long does it take to be sober? What do I know about drinking anyway?_  
  
The wind blew and I could do was sit and hug myself.  
  
***  
  
I didn’t know how long it had been already since I might have dozed off, when I heard tires squeaked a few feet from where I was. I struggled to open my eyes and saw Baekhyun got out of the car and hurriedly went to me.  
  
“Hae Won.” I heard him and there was absolute relief in his tone.  
  
He urged me to stand and immediately pulled me into a bone crushing hug.  
  
“God, you’re safe.” He stated, caressing the back of my head. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”

I didn’t do anything but savoured the warmth brought by his body next to mine.

 _Suddenly, the need to cry was so strong.  
  
***_  
When we got inside his house, I took off the padded jacket and  I directly went to where his swimming pool was. I felt suffocated being in the living room. He followed me there in silence, I was sure that he was watching my every move since I didn’t really bother hiding the effects of alcohol. _There was not use he wouldn’t notice anyway._  
  
Ugh, my head was still throbbing and I already feel like throwing a fit as my thoughts were again filled by Kim Ara. I was instantly reminded by the conversation I had with Kim Ara. I get to recall how hurt I was with her words that night. How she made it seem like I was going to be Baekhyun’s downfall. I wanted to break something, I was so stressed. My emotions were heightened and I wanted to just break down and cry but also vent my anger and frustration out.  
  
“Are you drunk?” He asked, sounding unhappy about it.  
  
I turned around to face him and I could even feel myself glaring at him.  
  
_Kim Ara was also drunk that night, right?_

My hands formed into fists and without saying anything, stepped closer to him and kissed him quickly on the lips.  
  
Taken aback, he didn’t move.  
  
I watched him look at me, puzzled.  
  
“Was it like that?” I asked, not minding to hide the indifference in my tone. “Was that how she kissed you Baekhyun?”  
  
He sighed, probably finally getting where this conversation was heading.  
  
“Baby, c’mon it must be the alcohol...” He reasoned out, obviously trying to dismiss the topic. “Why don’t we get you upstairs so you could take a rest…”  
  
However, I didn’t let him finish by stepping closer to him once again, placed my hands over his shoulders before I pressed my lips against his once more. I felt his shoulders tensed as I grazed I continued to kiss him.  
  
He wasn’t kissing me back and it had somehow aggravated me. He even held my arms and pulled me away from him.  
  
“Or was it like that?” I asked him right away, hurt and frustration overcoming every part of my being at the moment.  
  
He let out of a gloomy sigh, tilted his head away before meeting my eyes once more.  
  
“Tell me Baekhyun.” I insisted, not minding the troubled look on his face. “Was it more than that?”

I felt his grip on my arm tightened before they turned gentle. He gazed at me as if memorizing every detail of my face right now and must have seen tears pooling in my eyes. I was trying my hardest not to give in to tears again but his silence was making me feel more insecure.  
  
Then all of a sudden, the doorbell rang.  
  
His eyes never left mine and I held his gaze for as long as I could until I couldn’t anymore. I let out of a soft laugh and I must admit it even sounded sarcastic.  
  
“Just go get the door Baekhyun.” I told him, stepping away from him. “Must be someone important.” I added bluntly.  
  
He looked like he was about to say something but dismissed it by slowly making his way out of the pool area. I watched his back profile disappearing from my sight before I turned around and darted my attention to the water.  
  
_I hate this._ I hate how everywhere I go, I still couldn’t get rid of the idea of Baekhyun being with Ara. I knew I was making this hard for the both of us for acting this way but my chest wants to explode. I was so mad and I didn’t know why exactly. I knew I was mad because of everything that happened but I was certain I was also angry at myself for making this a very big deal.  


_Well, it is in fact a big deal, right?  
I knew that I should’ve prepared myself for conflicts related to his celebrity status but I guess I’d never be ready for something like this. _  
  
My attention never left the water and maybe I looked at it for too long that the next thing I knew, I already had my body submerged into the water. The pool was deep, my feet couldn’t feel the floor but I didn’t mind. The water was surprisingly warm and calming. Everything seemed to be quiet down here, drowning out even the noise in my head.  
  
I knew I couldn’t hold my breath any longer but I was desperate to hold on to the smallest amount of peace I was experiencing at the moment.  
  
_Then all of a sudden, a hand pulled me out of the water._  
  
I opened my eyes and saw him, the look of worry on his face was impossible to disregard. He brought me to the shallow part of the pool until my feet touched the floor and the water was a little over my waist. I instantly felt cold having my upper body part exposed to the wind.  
  
I looked at him as he brushed his hair up, way from his face. His black shirt sticking to his body revealing his toned chest and arms. He was panting as if he was the one who held his breath underwater.  
  
He gave me the kind of look I couldn’t read very well right now.  
  
“You didn’t have to do that.” I told him, trying my best to keep a steady voice because of the cold. “I was just doing fine in the water.” I added as I turned back to leave.  
  
“My god Hae Won. You got me so worried, I thought something bad happened.” He reasoned out, sounding so hurt and tired at the same time.  
  
“Well, I’m fine Baekhyun.” I fired back as soon as I left the pool.  
  
I heard him followed suit until he grabbed me by the arm and made me face him.  
  
“Tell me.” His voice was loud and authoritative.  
  
I met his eyes, before I watched how his jaw clenched in rage.    
  
“Tell me how you feel about it. Tell me how mad you are. Tell me how hurt you are because of what happened. Tell me how much you despise me right now for causing you this. Tell me how much you hate me for being stupid.”  
  
I could feel his own frustration as if it was my own by the way he said those words and the way he was looking at me right now.  
  
I swallowed, trying to be strong under his heavy gaze.  
  
“I’m not mad at you Baekhyun. I wish I am mad at you so I could just leave but I’m not. I know you don’t want any of these to happen but shit like this keeps happening to you and me.” I told him vehemently.  
  
He let go of my hand, as he tilted his head down, his hands on his waist.  
  
“I’m mad at myself. I keep asking why I can’t just be cool about it. I mean, I know fully well that you love me and that you wouldn’t intentionally do something to hurt me but it’s just so hard.” I went on, almost breathless from speaking so fast.  
  
I shook my head sideways as I let out of a harsh sigh.  
  
“I want to close my eyes and cover my ears and not listen to anyone so bad but…” I trailed off as I sobbed realizing that I had already been crying. “But I still do.”  
  
He made a step closer to me so I stepped back.  
  
“I wanted to forget about what I saw but every time I see you I am being reminded. I hear about you and Ara no matter where I go. People talk about you and it’s even on the news and it’s driving me crazy.” I paused to take a deep breath. “I don’t know where to go anymore.”  
  
He walked a few steps away from me to the table where he hammered his fists.  
  
"It's also sickening to think that she’s the one who gets to post a photo of the two of you freely on Instagram and get praised by your fans. Or show up in your house unannounced after your concert with flowers in her hand to congratulate you."  
  
"What?" He asked right away, a puzzled look on his face once more.

"Yes Baekhyun. She came to your house that night. I was here waiting for you and when she came in the front door saying she could still memorize the lock combination you gave her years ago. And you know what she told me? She told me that my relationship with you will ruin your career. She told me that she came back so you could keep what you worked hard for." I could feel my entire body tensed while I recalled every word she said to me that time.  
  
“She told me that between the two of us, she was clearly the one that you needed.”  
  
“You know that’s not true.”  
  
“Is it?”  
  
“Of course, it’s not. God knows how much I need and want you.”  
  
_I could only cry._

"Why didn't you tell me about this?" He asked.  "Why did you let me go to Paris with her after what she had done? After everything she’s told you…"  
  
_I felt a bit guilty having him in the dark about this until now._

"Why? Would things have been different if I told you about it? Would you have stayed instead?"

"Yes!" He convicted. “Yes, I would’ve stayed.”

_I shook my head sideways, refusing to believe him._

"No.” I protested.  “You would have been in trouble if you stayed behind."

He threw me an incredulous look.  
  
"My god Park Hae Won, let me deal with my own problems at work, will you?" He replied in a perpetually tired voice. "If I get in trouble because of my job, then it's my _fucking_ call."

"And how do you think would I feel about it Baekhyun? Do you think I could just sit there, have you all to myself and be selfish?"

"That is not being selfish." He reasoned out, exasperatedly. "You're my girlfriend Hae Won and you have every right to demand for my time. Damn, I'm even giving you a say to what projects I participate in. So, please if something makes you feel uncomfortable, say it…because I won't do it." His voice sounded a bit endearing ending his statement.

I kept quiet, unable to find the right response, trying to ignore the throbbing pain in my head.  
  
"Is there something else you're not telling me?" He asked in a controlled voice.  
  
I was aware that he wasn't scolding me or something but the remaining effects of the alcohol in my body was making me think of crazy things. I couldn’t think rationally. I couldn’t seem to make his statements to fully sink in. All I knew was my heart was still so heavy and I had to get everything off my chest right now.

"You want me to be completely honest with you right now Baekhyun?" I asked in a challenging tone.

"Yes." His answer came really fast and straightforward.

"Okay.” I snapped, my face was heating. “I'm going to tell you the truth so listen very well." I added and I was aware that I was yelling at him right now but I just couldn't control the volume of my voice.  
  
I opened my mouth to speak but for some reasons, I couldn’t find the right words. I ended up closing my mouth and brought a hand to wipe my tear stained cheeks.

"I just…” I trailed off as I struggled to say the words. “I just want to love you freely. I want you to hold my hand on the street without having to worry about anything…I want to come running in to your arms right after every concert to congratulate you and tell you how proud I am of you…” I sobbed. “I want to love you like other normal girlfriends do."

I knew I couldn’t just overlook the disheartened look on his face right now after what I had just said. I knew this was what he wanted to do all along and he had been very vocal about his frustration about things normal couples do that we couldn’t.

"I want to tell my parents and my sister about you. Tell them how much you're making me happy and assure them that I am in good hands. I wanna tell them how much I love you Baekhyun. How your smile makes me crazy most of the time or how you make me feel like I’m the luckiest girl in the world.”

I saw him walked closer to me, ready to console me.  
  
"But I can't do that.” I said, moving my head sideways. “I can't do any of that."  
  
He was right in front of me now, his thumbs wiping my tears away as he cupped my face with his hands. And as I looked up to meet his eyes, I was pretty sure I saw a hint of tears.  
  
“I love you so much my heart wants to explode.” I told him in between sobs.

"Baby I'm sorry." He apologized, leaning his forehead against mine.

"Why does it have to be so hard?" I asked, unable to stop crying.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” He kept apologizing, pain was as evident in his tone as it was in his actions.  
  
_My heart was breaking and so was his._  
  
“I’m sorry.” I told him as I placed my hands over his own. “I’m sorry for being weak.”  
  
“Shhh…” He hushed before sniffling. “You’re not weak.” He added with a sense of guilt.  
  
He was crying and it broke my heart broke even more.

I leaned away and brought my hands to hold his face.  
  
“Baby, you’re the strongest woman I know.” He stated before leaning closer to press his lips against my own for a brief second.

It was so cold and I felt like collapsing at any moment.  
  
_My head was aching and so was my heart._  
  
“And I love you more for that.”  
  
I heard him say earnestly giving me a fond look before pulling me into a tight hug.  
  
And suddenly, right at that very moment, all the pain and frustration I felt

 

didn’t seem to matter…  
  
  
_anymore._    


_For now._  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  
  
  
  
AN: Forgive me for the angst. I just had to.   
  



	31. Thirty One

  
  
  
  
~♥~   
  


He took me to sit on the chair before wrapping a towel around me. I couldn’t stop crying and I already felt my body shaking because of the cold. He took another chair and sat in front of me as he brushed the hair away from my face.  
  
“Baby, I’m really sorry.”

It was the first thing that he said after staring at me silently for a couple of minutes while I looked back at him, still sobbing.  
  
“Seeing you this way…” He let out of what seemed to be a regretful sigh as he bent to cover his face with his hands, his elbows on his knees.  
  
He looked as devastated as I was. When he straightened up his posture and faced me once more, I could clearly distinguish the tears from the water dripping from his wet hair.  
  
“I shouldn’t have let you go a while ago.” He added, remorse evident in his tone. “Watching you leave drove me crazy mad. I couldn’t even think straight for one second. I wanted to stop you, so bad...” He trailed off to take a deep breath.  
  
He lifted his both hands to brush his hair away from his face.  
  
“Damn.” He hissed, momentarily looking away as I watched how his hands formed into fists on his lap.  
  
It took about a couple of seconds before the look on his face transformed into something else.  
_Despair._  
  
“But I also wanted to give you the space that you wanted.” He stated, his head titled down. “I stayed in the car for a few minutes. But then, I kept convincing myself not to follow you to respect your decision but I could only hold it for so long before I decided to follow you.”  
  
The moment he met my eyes once more, my heart wanted to get out of my chest, it was beating so loud. It hurts to see him this way. I knew he already felt so bad about what happened and I didn’t seem to know how to make it better.  
  
“I wanted to make sure you were safe and I didn’t care if you’re gonna get mad at me for doing it. So, I tried to look for you but I was too late. I couldn’t find you anymore.” He paused to place his hands over mine.  
  
His hands, despite being wet, still brought that familiar warmth.  
  
“I looked for you anywhere, every street, I wanted to get out of the car and get in to every café, every corner but there were too many…” He said breathlessly before pausing.  
  
His sentence was left unfinished but I knew what he meant. But somehow, I still didn’t have the right mind coordination to answer, nor even make a sound. The look of pain on his face was making me feel worse.  
  
“I said I wouldn’t hurt you.” There was still an ambiguous anger but evident remorse in his voice.  “But it’s what I exactly did.”  
  
The glisten present in his eyes right after saying his last statement left a pang in my heart. And suddenly, I couldn’t seem to afford not holding him. So, without wasting any time, I pulled him into a hug.  
  
Silence was what came after.  
No wanting him to hear any of my sobs, I bit my lip.  
  
***

  
9:34AM  
  
As expected, I woke up the next morning with a terrible headache. I groaned in pain, as soon as I was conscious. And with my eyes still closed, I brought my hands to my head.  
  
_You’re never gonna drink again, Park Hae Won._  
  
I silently scolded myself as I finally struggled to open my eyes and instantly realized that I was in his room. I rolled to the other side of the bed but it was empty. My thoughts immediately wandered to his whereabouts. I got off the bed wanting to look for him. I slightly winced as soon as my bare feet made contact with the cold floor because for some reasons, it triggered my headache.  
  
_Ugh, this is unreasonable. I grunted._  
  
I walked towards the door but stopped as soon as I passed by a full length mirror. I was wearing his grey shirt which was of course way too big for me paired with a navy blue plaid pyjamas.  
  
_I couldn’t remember changing into his clothes last night._ I closed my eyes and tried to recall but the last memory I had was us talking by the pool.  It’s weird. It’s strange not being able to remember what happened. And maybe I forced my brain so hard, my head ended up hurting again. Not that it went away anyway.  
  
I gave it up. I decided to just ask Baekhyun about it later.  
_But first, I need to find him._  
  
I went out of his room, walked through the hallway and stopped on my feet when I was about to take the stairs. I heard voices talking but it was inaudible. I looked around, trying to determine where it’s coming from. It took me about a few seconds to know where the sound was originating, his study room. My feet, having a mind of their own, walked towards the room on the right.  
  
My heartbeat was starting to race as I neared the ajar door. My brain crammed as I was finally able to recognize Baekhyun’s voice but still couldn’t make out of his words. I stopped right in front of the door and about a second after, as if getting my rational senses back, I turned around dismissing the thought of eavesdropping.  
  
“No hyung, tell them to fuck off!”  
  
I almost jumped, stopping on my feet. I closed my eyes, my hands on my chest. I was so surprised by the volume of his voice.  
  
“That’s not gonna happen!” He said once more with the same amount of rage in his tone. “No one is telling me what to do.”  
  
There was a brief silence and I kept convincing myself to walk away but my feet seemed to be glued on the floor.

“I understand how mad you are right now, Baekhyun but we need to think this through. You gotta calm down.”  
  
I was a hundred percent sure that it was Manager Kang.

_Silence. I could imagine Baekhyun taking a deep breath._  
  
“From what I found out, Publisher Kim must’ve known about this all along.” Manager Kang added. “I heard she was the one who contacted Ara and told her about your leaked photo with Haewon a couple of months ago.”  
  
“What?” The disbelief on Baekhyun’s voice was so evident.

“I’m not sure but it seemed that she was the one who convinced her to come back and help out with the mess. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was the one who pushed about you and Ara’s photo shoot.”  
  
“Damnit!” He hissed. “I asked her to clean the mess not to make something worse out of it.”  
  
I was startled when I heard a loud thud, it must be his fists on the table or something.    
  
“So, you’re telling me...” It was Baekhyun. “You’re telling me that this was a set up? That Ara kissed me on purpose and that someone was ready to take a photo of it?”  
  
“Most likely.” His manager’s answer came is quick.  
  
“Damnit!” He hissed once more, this time louder. “How could I be so stupid?! I can’t believe I let them play me. Fuck!”  
  
I heard his heavy breathing as I tried to keep mine steady as well.  
_Publisher Kim and Ara?_  
  
“Hyung...” His voice has softened. “All I want is to be with Hae Won…” I heard his footsteps. “Why does everything have to be this complicated? Is it wrong to fight for something that makes me happy?”  
  
There was a quick pause and it allowed me to feel something gripping my heart.  
  
“I love what I do but why does it seem like chasing after my own happiness is a crime?”  
  
He took a deep breath.  
  
“What did I ever do to them to treat me this way?”  
  
_Betrayal._ I knew it was what he was feeling as of the moment, or maybe something more than that. He had worked with Publisher for the longest time.  
  
_I couldn’t imagine how hurt he must be right now._  
  
“How’s Hae Won?” Manager Kang asked, probably wanting to distract him.  
  
_It hurts to listen to him talk about what he wants like this._  
  
“She’s not fine.” He answered in a disheartened voice.  “After looking for her everywhere last night, I found her outside the house…drunk.” He sighed gloomily.  “She’s not fine Hyung. She kept telling me she is before passing out last night but I know it’s not true…I wanted to punish myself for making her feel miserable. She didn’t deserve any of this….I have put her through a lot already. And I can’t stop hating myself for it.”  
  
My heart continued to sink.  
_Oh Baekhyun._  
I knew he must have been feeling guilty but hearing this confirmation straight from his was just excruciating.  
  
“You never wanted any of these to happen.” The elder reasoned out. “And I’m sure she knows that.”  
  
“Yes but seeing her suffer because of all this mess…” He paused.  
  
I listened to the loud beating behind my chest as I waited for his next words.  
  
“Sometimes, I wished she never met me instead…in that case, she wouldn’t have to deal with all these controversies.”  
  
_If I hadn’t met him…_  
If I didn’t…  
I can’t even process what he just said.  
Was it possible not to meet him in the first place?  
  
_Do I want it that way?_  
  
I blinked my eyes a couple of times, then tilted my head up to fight the formation of tears in my eyes.  
  
“But I can’t imagine my life without her.” Baekhyun voice filled my thoughts once more.  
  
I lifted a hand to my chest as if my whole composure depended on it.  
  
“And I know I might be selfish but I’m going to fight to keep her in it. I can’t lose her. I’d be damned if I do.”  
  
_I bit my lip._  
A tear successfully escaped and rolled down my cheek.  
I wished I would run out of tears.  
_I’m tired of crying._  
  
“I know Baekhyun.” Manager Kang replied.  
  
_A few moments of silence took place._  
  
“What are you gonna do now? The photos are everywhere.”  
  
“I don’t know. I honestly don’t know yet. But I’m going to do anything, everything to make this right. I have to tell everyone that this is nothing but a misunderstanding as soon as possible. They have to know that I am not in any sort of relationship with Ara anymore.” His voice sounded so determined.  
  
“I’ll have a meeting with the entire team.”  
  
“Make sure Publisher Kim isn’t a part of it.” He added. “Tell her to look for another artist to work with or else she’s getting sued.”  
  
I could just imagine how his jaw clenched while saying it.  
  
“What about Ara?”  
  
“I’ll talk to her. She either has to fix this or I’ll do it…and she won’t like how I’m going to do it.”  
  
I shivered at how he said it.  
  
“Baek.” Manager Kang said, his voice sounded worried. “I promise I’ll see what I can do to help you out... I know a lot is going through your mind right now, but try not to do anything reckless. It’s too risky. We have to be careful. Your reputation is at stake.”  
  
I haven’t heard any word from any of them the next few seconds. Then there were footsteps nearing the door, I panicked but it was too late for me to even move a muscle.  
  
The next moment I knew, I could already feel someone standing right behind me. I slowly turned around to check who it was, my heart pounding behind my chest.  
  
I held my breath when I saw Manager Kang’s profile. He looked as surprised as I was before an apologetic expression took over his face.  
  
I gulped as my throat seemed to have run dry.  
I neither know what to say, nor what to do.  
  
“Hae won…” He uttered before he tilted his head down to acknowledge my presence.  
  
I hesitantly did the same thing before he walked passed me. He must have been caught off guard as I was.  
  
I stayed on my spot for a couple of minutes before I heard some movement inside the room. And as if my body got the signal, my feet hurriedly walked as fast as I could.  
  
I went back to his room, stood right behind the door for a brief second before lying on the bed.  
  
_Ara and Publisher Kim?  
Ara and Publisher Kim?  
Ara and Publisher Kim?  
  
I couldn’t even get my brain to process the thought. Why would they do this to him?  
  
Is it a crime to fight for something that makes me happy?  
Why does it seem like chasing after my own happiness is a mistake?_  
  
I felt my heart sinking, recalling the hurt in his tone.  
_Then I thought, if I hadn’t showed up in his life, would all of these happen?_  
  
I closed my eyes for a few seconds wanting to divert my attention to something else when I heard the door opened.  
  
_Baekhyun._ I knew it was him but for some reasons I didn’t open my eyes and pretended to sleep. I didn’t really know why I had to do that.  
I felt him climb on the bed beside me and the next thing I knew, he was already brushing my hair with his fingers.  
  
“Hey baby, wake up.” He said, gently.  
  
_No more pretending, I thought._  
I opened my eyes and looked up to meet his eyes. My heart almost melted at the sight of his eye smiles.  
  
_How is he even smiling like this after what he found out?_  
_God, Byun Baekhyun. Stop trying to make me feel better._  
It hurts how he had to keep a straight face in front of me.  
  
“How do you feel?” He asked as he planted a quick kiss on my forehead.  
  
_I should be the one asking him this._  
  
“Bad.” I uttered.  
  
He let out of a soft laugh.  
  
“My poor baby.” He teased, pouting.  
  
_Oh my heart._  
  
“I made you something. It’ll help you with the hang over.” He said as he stretched his arm to get something from the bedside table next to him.  
  
He handed me a glass with _redish-orangey_ liquid inside.  
  
“Does it taste good?” The first thing I was able to ask. “It looks weird.” I added.  
  
“It doesn’t.” He chuckled. “I’m sure it doesn’t. But you have to drink this.”  
  
I was hesitant to take the glass from him because it did look really weird but he made it for me and he said it’d help so I did eventually.  
  
I was aware that his eyes were on me the moment I sipped on the drink. I was right, it tasted weird. There’s tomato, carrot and ginger and _oh my gosh_ I couldn’t stand the taste.  
  
“Did you put everything you had in the kitchen here?”  
  
He laughed so hard.

I gestured to stop drinking but he urged me to drink more.  
  
“I can’t anymore.” I protested.  
  
“Just a little more Baby.” He egged on.  
  
So, I did. Closing my eyes, I tried my hardest to drink as much as I could.  
  
“Good girl.” He said patting my head when I almost finished everything.  
  
“I’m not getting drunk ever again.” I swore as I handed the glass back to him.  
  
“I hope you never have to again.” He replied and I couldn’t neglect the hint of guilt in his tone.  
  
***  
  
We were lying on the bed, snuggling against each other. My eyes were closed as I concentrated on the sound of the beating of his heart and his steady breathing. He buried his face on my neck like the always did, the tip of his nose touching my skin, the soft feel of his lips distracting me every time he unintentionally graze it against my neck.  
  
Then I remembered something.  
  
“Baek?”  
  
“Hmm…”  
  
“Who changed my clothes last night?”  
  
I swear, I could feel his smile without even seeing it.  
  
“Why is it always an issue to you Baby?”  
  
I opened my mouth to argue but no words came out.  
  
“Of course I did.” He answered using a matter of fact tone.  
  
_My face suddenly felt warm._  
  
“What?!” I exclaimed unbelievably.  
  
“Why are you so shocked?” He asked with an incredulous expression on his face when he leaned away to look at me.  
  
His remarks made me a thousand times shy, I had to look away. Then I heard him let out of a soft laugh.  
  
“What’s funny?”  
  
“Nothing.” He said, a crazy smile on his lips before pulling me into a tight hug.

“Baekhyun!” I whined. “What is it?”  
  
He ignored me.  
  
“Did you really do it?” I continued to interrogate because I somehow felt like he was making fun of me.  
  
_Well. In fact he was really making fun of me and my tomato-like face right now._  
  
His muffled laugh resonated and filled my ears and I just had to pinch his sides to get his attention.  
  
“Ow!” He exclaimed and exaggeratedly groaning in pain. “Okay you did.” He finally confessed when I pinched him again.  
  
“I did what?”  
  
“You changed your clothes yourself last night.” He said sulking.  
  
“Are you sure?”  
  
“Yes.” He answered hastily. “If I did it…then you wouldn’t have pyjamas on.” He said, his eyes piercing through mine.  
  
_I gulped. Ugh, this man._  
  
“Why do you always like to make fun of me?” I asked him, couldn’t help but sulk as well.  
  
I pushed his chest away from me using my hands so I could turn around. I knew this was lame, but my face was about to explode because of embarrassment.  
  
But then, it only took a couple of seconds before I felt him come near me. His hand found their way to my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder.  
  
“Because I love you.” He whispered.  
  
_His words sent shiver down my spine._  
  
“Thank you for coming home to me.” He added, his voice filled with affection. “I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if you didn’t.”  
  
I closed my eyes, as his familiar warmth enveloped me. Having his arms wound around me like this, with our bodies pressed against each other was kinda distracting.  
  
I turned to face him and instantly met the sad look in his eyes. I wanted to take it away. I wanted him to forget about it. I wanted to forget about it.  
  
We both held each other’s gaze.  
  
_Maybe a distraction is what we both need right now._  
  
So, I took a deep breath before I leaned closer, closed my eyes and waited for my lips to make contact with his.  
  
I gave him a soft, steady kiss before leaning away.  
  
“Let’s forget about everything for now, hmm?” Meeting his eyes once more, I told him.  
  
I watched how his face looked afflicted for a moment before it was replaced by something else. His gaze turned heavy. I even heard him swallow.  
  
 I knew he was getting the message.  
  
“Make me forget, Baekhyun.”  
  
In just a matter of few seconds, he already had his strong hand at the back of my neck, pulling my head closer to his. His lips grazing against mine for a brief moment.  
  
“I love you.”  
  
These last three words reached my ears right before his mouth unstoppably claimed mine. The kiss started off cautious at first then it became intruding and needy. Sending every possible thought not related to what was happening right now out of the window. I was drowning with how good this was when he stopped all of a sudden to sit only to have me holding my breath when he pulled my pyjamas off.  
  
As my heart almost skipped a beat because of what he just did…  
A smirk. I swear I saw a handsome smirk on his face when he did it.  
  
“Maybe I did change your clothes last night.” He teased.  
  
I groaned, rolling my eyes at his antics. I wanted to argue but he sure didn’t have any intention to let me when his strong arms suddenly lifted me up and made me sit on his lap, facing him, my knees bent and ended up spreading around his waist.  
  
I thought he was going to start kissing me again but didn’t. He took his shirt off in one swift move instead. His perfectly toned chest and broad shoulders taking my entire attention. I brought my hands to his chest and cautiously grazed my fingers against his warm skin.  
  
When I looked at his face, I was immediately mesmerized with how handsome he looked. He had always been handsome but he looked very different right now. His dishevelled hair almost covering his eyes. So, from his chest, I took my hands on his face to brush the hair away, freeing his beautiful forehead.  
  
_How is this man for real, honestly?_  
  
I swear. There’s not a single part of his face that’s not attractive. The moles which have been seemingly plotted perfectly on their spots. His eyebrows, his eyes, his nose, his lips...  
  
_Then I noticed something else._ Aside from desire that’s painted all over his face, there was something else. What could it be, I didn’t know exactly but it gave me that sinking feeling behind my chest. Then maybe…maybe it was the same thing I had been trying to take my mind off.  
  
_Hurt, pain, worry and guilt. Everything related to what we were trying to escape from._  
  
Now, I didn’t want anything else but to lift whatever it was that’s making him feel down. I held his gaze before I cupped his face with my both hands.  
  
“I’m scared of losing you too.” I told him, making an effort to sound reassuring.  
  
I saw him swallow, his jaw slightly clenching in the process before he pressed his eyes closed. Then he buried his face in my neck, his hands around me tightening.  
  
I was sure, I was so sure I’d start to be emotional but then I felt him take a deep breath and all of sudden titled my head down using his both hands and crashed his lips against mine. There was something about how every time his lips collide with mine that sends my rational thoughts somewhere else. The need and the want to drown myself with how good he was making me feel was overwhelming. It was so strong I wouldn’t even win no matter how hard I resist it. _Though I didn’t have any intention to fight it._  
  
Returning his kisses, wrapping my hands around his neck, my fingers tugging on his hair…  
Every part of my body seemed to have known to fully function. My skin sensitive to his every touch. When he detached his lips from mine, I breathed raggedly, desperate for air. I momentarily opened my eyes only to shut them close once more when I felt his teeth grazing my jaw while his hands pulled my body closer to his, closing the littlest amount of distance left between us. Then he held my nape and gently tilted it on the right to have a better access because the next thing I knew, he tugged my shirt down my left shoulder. Watching him lean closer to plant a kiss on my shoulder made me realized how this was working.  
  
_It’s working._ Every time his lips would make contact with my skin, it somehow blurred images in my head. Thoughts that were a product of overthinking, the anxiousness and insecurities I felt in my nerves slowly ebbing away like waves leaving the shore.  
  
Suddenly, his gazes, his ragged breathing, his warmth, his hair entangling with my fingers, his firm hands on my skin…were like colourful hues splashing over my seemingly now blank canvass thoughts.  
  
He made a swift move to lay me down, my body gently landing on the mattress. Meeting my eyes for a second, I heard him utter in a low, raspy voice.  
  
“I’m not gonna allow anything or anyone to take you away from me.”  
  
_Conviction._  
It was evident both in his tone and the way he stared at me.  
  
***

2:14PM  
  
We were in his car, driving out of the city. It was after lunch when he told me that he wanted to take me somewhere. I was at first, uncomfortable with the thought of us going out in the middle of this controversy but he assured me that there won’t be anyone else there.  
  
So, I agreed.  
  
After about two hours of drive, we reached our destination. The place had no signs nor traces of the city. He stopped the car right outside a wooden entrance.  
  
All geared up for the cold, we made our way inside. There was an array of Trees on either side that had almost lost all their leaves to Winter, making a long, perfect autumn covered leaves path.  
  
_Wow. This is beautiful._  
  
I stopped on my feet as I looked up. The clear sky and the rays of the sun abundantly hover all over the place through the empty branches of the trees. I closed my eyes to inhale a breath of fresh air.  
  
The air was cool and a bit crisp, I was pretty sure my nose and cheeks would turn red. I was enjoying everything when I felt his hands fixing my scarf.  
  
He made me wear a long, black padded jacket and wrapped a scarf around my neck before leaving the car. He was also wearing the same but with a black bucket hat on that pretty much concealed most of his face.  
  
“How do you know places like this Baek?” I asked him out of curiosity while I wait for him to finish fixing my scarf.  
  
“Well, if you’re not free to roam around like other normal people could, you have to find places where you can be yourself.” He answered. “I once filmed a music video here. It was also at this time of the year and I loved how it peaceful and unoccupied it was. So, I came here every year.” He trailed off to gently lift my chin with his hand.  
  
I watched him remove his hat with his other hand as he planted a light, unannounced kiss that I wasn’t ready for.  
  
“You don’t know how happy I am to be here with you this time.” He said, the corner of his lips turning upwards. “I’m not alone anymore.”  
  
I couldn’t help but smile both at his gesture and his remarks.  
  
“Thank you for taking me to your secret places.” I replied.  
  
He pulled closer to him so he could hug me from the back for a few seconds. We admired the magnificent pathway before us silently before he took my hand and lead me to walk ahead.  
  
“Someday…” He muttered, catching my attention as I looked at him.  “Someday I’ll be able to hold your hand like this in a crowded place.”  
  
I suddenly felt a bit guilty, recalling the words that came out of my mouth last night.  
  
“Baek…”  
  
He moved his head sideways, signalling me to stop.  
  
“I’ll do it, someday. I will make sure it happens.” He smiled at me. “I promise.”  
  
I felt sad, I didn’t really mean to pressure him about it or something.  
  
“Do you believe me?” He asked with a yearning look on his face.  
  
_Soft. The look on his face made me feel so soft._  
  
I nodded and as a result, he lifted our hands to his mouth and gave the back of my hand a soft kiss.  
  
The place was so beautiful and we were taking it all in together. I absolutely didn’t want to ruin it by asking him about anything we left in the city. So, when that familiar sinking feeling behind my chest tried to resurface, I leaned closer to him, clinging my on to his arm.  
  
“Are you cold?” I heard him ask.  
  
I nodded, because I really was.  
  
We stopped walking and made us stand face to face. Then, he took my hands and had my palms pressed before I watch him blow on his hands, rubbed them and placed them on mine. The instant warmth brought by his hands on mine was satisfying.  
  
“Is it helping?”  
  
My response came in the form of a nod once more.

He did it a couple of time more and all I did was watch him.  
_How is this man real, really?_  
  
When he was done, he held my hands with his and put it inside his jacket’s pockets, saying it’d preserve the warmth.  
  
I couldn’t help but laugh at his antics but got so conscious when I felt him staring at me. He looked a bit serious and it got me worried.  
  
“What’s wrong?”  
  
He gazed at me for the next couple of seconds and I couldn’t tell what was going on in his head.  
  
“You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.” He told me, as he gave my hands, which were still inside his pockets, a squeeze. “Do you know how much I love you?”  
  
I just looked back at him as his eyes continue to bore into mine. I felt like getting lost in his gaze.  
  
“I love you to the point I’m about to ask you to run away with me.”  
  
_His words, always knew their way to my heart.  
Honestly, my little heart may have been a home for his words._  
  
Then, he made a step back before tugging my hands to his direction, sending me crashing next to him.  
  
“I love you…” I muttered, leaning against him.   
  
I closed my eyes as I mentioned his name.  
  
“Byun Baekhyun.”  
  
_Even his name, sounded like music to my ears._  
  
***  
The long pathway seemed endless as we walked ahead, our steps as slow as possible. I love doing this with him. Slow walks, our fingers entangled, dried leaves crushed right beneath our every step as we pay glances to each other from time to time.  
  
“I want to show you something.” He said all of a sudden.  
  
“What is it?” I turned to him.

“You’ll see.” He said as he led the way.  
  
Our steps fastened until we were already running. As we did, I couldn’t help but look at his back profile. His hair bouncing, and that sparkle in his eyes when he glanced at me was priceless.  
  
_Makes me think that I don’t really mind running away with him._  
  
We ran until I was already out of breath. Then as we were about to reach the end of the pathway, he turned right and stopped right behind a tree. I immediately bent, my free hand resting on my knee so I could catch my breath. And while I did this, I looked around trying to find something special about the spot but couldn’t find anything.  
  
I was about to turn to him and ask him but he left me startled when he pulled me by the waist and had me pinned on the trunk of the tree. I was obviously still out of breath, my chest moving up and down from all the running and somehow couldn’t even find the right coordination to express what I want to say in words when he leaned closer, resting his hands on either sides.  
  
_What are you doing?_ My poor brain tried to ask but failed to have my mouth verbalize it.  
  
A _seductive_ smile escaped his lips as he bore his eyes into mine. He was panting but not like the way I was. However, I could feel his breath fanning my face as his face was about an inch away from mine.  
  
_What is he gonna do?_  
  
Then in a matter of a second, my unheard question was answered when he closed the gap between our lips and started to kiss me.  
  
_Byun Baekhyun, I’m still trying to catch my breath!_  
  
The voice in my head wanting to protest disappeared after a split second when his persuasive mouth got me to agree with what he’s up to and had me closing my eyes. With his hand landing on the curve of my waist, pulling my body closer, I just had to give it to this man. And when he tugged on my lower lip, I couldn’t help but succumb to him.  
  
_If there’s another thing Byun Baekhyun is good at, it would be making me feel like I’m the only one that matters when I’m inside his arms_.  
  
_It feels like home._

A cocky smile appeared when he detached his lips from mine as he stared at me like he was staring at my very soul. He looked so handsome, I couldn’t even blink my eyes afraid that he would disappear if I did.

“A…are you trying to kill me?” I asked him, wanting to distract myself from totally going crazy.  
  
“Why?” He replied, obviously amused.  
  
“Can’t you see I was still trying to catch my breath?” I added.  
  
He chuckled.  
  
“I was just trying to return the favor baby.” He reasoned out, tightening his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. “Can’t you see you’re also making me catch my breath?”  
  
_Oh my god._ _I hate him._ _I hate him and his lame pick up line._  
_And I hate how it gave me the butterflies and ended up smiling._  
  
 “I thought you’re going to show me something?” For some miracle, I remembered to ask.  
  
“I was but you looked so hot panting like that I just had to kiss you first.”

_There goes that crazy handsome grin on his face, it makes me weak on the knees._  
  
“Crazy.” I muttered as I slightly hit his arm.  
  
He leaned closer and easily gave my lips a soft peck.  
  
“You’re blushing.” He told me when I was about to argue before planting three more quick kisses on my mouth.  
  
_The butterflies in my stomach had turned into birds._  
  
“God, I love kissing you.” He said with a soft laugh. “And I’m the only one who has the right to kiss you, okay?”  
  
I almost laughed at how possessive his statement sounded like but held it back.  
  
I nodded, trying my best to stifle a smile.  
  
“So what is it that you’re going to show me?” I asked immediately since my heart couldn’t seem to handle clingy Baekhyun anymore.  
  
“Okay close your eyes.” He told me as he let go of me.

“Baek, no more games please.” I replied, stepping away from him.

“Yes, I promise.” He swore. “Go ahead close your eyes.” He instructed.  
  
_Honestly, he looked pretty convincing, so I did._ Mentally preparing myself for the possible prank he was going to pull this time.  
  
I didn’t really know what to feel while my eyes were closed. I kept trying to think of what he could be up to and my brain was still trying to tell me to calm down when I felt his satin like lips on mine once more.  
  
_Another quick kiss._  
  
“Now, open your eyes.” I heard him say as soon as his mouth left mine.  
  
I did what I was told to do and found his hand balled into fist in front of me, giving me a hint that there was something inside.  
  
I looked at him, wondering when he revealed what was inside. The first thing I saw was a gold chain which later on turned out to be a necklace with a small gold… _strawberry pendant?_

_I gasped.  
  
One, because it was so pretty.  
Two, because I couldn’t believe he was giving me something like this._  
  
“Baek…” It was all that I could muster, still staring at the small, extremely pretty pendant.  
  
The strawberry pendant was so lovely. I had never seen anything like it. Oh _my heart._  
  
“Let me put it on you.” He stated with a soft expression on his face as he moved behind me.  
  
I took my scarf off so he could put it on me. When it was done, I reached for the pendant and couldn’t help but admire how beautiful it looked.

“Do you like it?” He asked, his eyes on me.  
  
Instead of a simple yes as an answer, I tiptoed to give him a big hug.  
  
“I love it Baek!” I exclaimed. “Thank you.”  
  
“I’m glad you did.” He replied, hugging me back as he spun me around.  
  
_I swear, my feet left the ground._  
  
“You know why I’m giving you a strawberry pendant right?” I heard him when I was on my feet again.  
  
“Because strawberries are your favourite?” I told him when we broke the hug.  
  
“Do you remember when I told you up at the old hiking place that I was going to call you strawberry?”  
  
_I looked away to think about it._  
  
“I do.” I replied, recalling how he even made me blush telling me he’d call me strawberry because my face looked like one when I blush.  
  
“Since that day, I never looked at strawberries the same way again. They always remind me of you and your blushing cheeks. I think I came to love them even more.”  
  
I laughed, I couldn’t help but be amused.  
  
“You’re my favourite strawberry in the world.” He said as I noticed him pinning me against the tree once more.  
  
“Really?” I asked, feeling my back against the trunk.  
  
“Uhuh…” He nodded. “In fact I named you Strawberry on my contacts.”  
  
“For real?” My eyes widened.  
  
“For real.” He answered, his mouth only about an inch closer to mine. “You want proof?”  
  
I nodded, since it was the only thing I could do.  
  
“Later.” He muttered.  
  
…and kissed me for the _nth_ time today.  
  
***  
  
We were sitting on a set of wooden chair and table that’s facing a small lake. I had my attention fixed on a single yellow leaf on the water when he spoke.

“Do you think your parents will like me?”  
  
I had to blink my eyes to make sure that he was indeed asking me this question. I admit, I was a bit taken a bath, I wasn’t able to answer him.  
  
“You mentioned that you wanted to tell your sister and your parents about me.” He added and I could sense that wishful tone in his voice. “Do you think they’ll like me?”  
  
_His words and the way he said it warmed my heart._  
  
“Of course Baek.” I finally answered when I found the right words to say. “I’m pretty sure they’ll like you.” I added as I lifted a hand to his cheek.  “What’s not to like about you anyway?”  
  
“A lot.” I felt him take a deep breath as he looked down. “All these controversies, I come with I guess.”  
  
_Oh…_  
  
“We’ll figure it out when you meet them, okay?” I told him, not really sure what else to say to make him feel better. “I’m sure we’ll figure it out.”  
  
A sad smile crossed his face before he made me lean in closer to rest my head on his shoulder.  
  
“I know you heard everything Manager Kang and I talked about this morning.”  
  
_I held my breath._  
  
“He told me he saw you right outside the room….” He trailed off as I felt his chest move up to fill his lungs with air. "I’m sorry you had to hear it.”  
  
“Baek…”  
  
“So, when I came back to my room and you pretended to sleep as if nothing happened…” He paused to plant a firm kiss on my forehead. “I love you and I hate how I make you suffer over and over again.”  
  
I gulped, my brain taking me back to what he said a while ago.  
_“Sometimes, I wished she never met me instead…”  
  
Is he breaking up with me?_  
Everything inside me started to panic.  
  
I leaned away from him so sudden and shot him a worried look. I waited for him to say something but no words came from him. I bit my lip as my heart pounded.  
  
“Are you…” I paused as it was so difficult for me to even say the words. “Are you breaking up with me?”  
  
I saw how his eyes widened.  
  
“What?” He sounded so surprised. “No.” He added firmly as he took my face in his hands. “Of course not. That would be the last thing I would do.”  
  
Relief took over me and it probably was written all over my face.  
  
“What made you think I’m breaking up with you? God, I’d never do that.” He said in a matter of fact tone as he pulled me in for hug. “I can’t even stand the thought of not seeing you for a few days.”  
  
_I must be crazy._  
  
***  
  
7:34PM  
  
We arrived at his house when he seemed to notice another car parked. It wasn’t his and for some reasons I kind of had the idea of whose it was. And I was proven right when I saw her get out of the car as soon as Baekhyun parked.  
  
I saw Baekhyun gripped on the steering wheel before he got out, leaving the door ajar. I haven’t heard them talking yet when I saw someone joined them. It was Mr. Yoo.  
  
“I’m sorry Baekhyun, she was insisted to get in. She said she would cause a scene if I didn’t let her in.”  
  
“It’s fine Mr. Yoo. Just go back to your post.” Baekhyun replied in a calm voice.  
  
Then, I heard Mr. Yoo’s fading footsteps.  
  
“Baek, we need to talk.” She said right away.  
  
Hearing her voice caused that familiar pain right behind my chest to resurface right away.  
_God, I hate how much power she had over my emotions._  
  
Baekhyun did not answer, he closed the door of the driver’s car instead and walked towards the passenger’s seat to hold the door open for me.  
  
I wasn’t really sure if it was the right thing but I had to trust him. So, hesitant as I was, I got off the car and saw how startled Ara looked like when she laid eyes on me.  
  
She was wearing a fancy beige overcoat looking as beautiful as ever.  
  
“You want to talk?” Baekhyun asked.  “Let’s talk with my girlfriend.” He added and how he emphasized his last word did not escape my attention.  
  
“Baek.” I hesitated.

“It’s fine Baby. There’s nothing too personal that we have to talk anyway.” He told me as he held my hand.  
  
My heartbeat raced with his unexpected and totally unannounced act. And I just saw Ara’s eyes darted to our hands. She looked stunned for a moment before she tilted her head down. She was hurt. I could see it clearly. Especially with the way she took a deep breath, momentarily looking away.  
  
“What are you doing here, Ara?” I heard Baekhyun asked coldly.  
  
She turned to look at him, forcing a smile.   
  
“Well, I was hoping I could talk to you in private about what happened. But you’re clearly not alone.” She answered.  
  
_This is awkward. Not to mention, annoying at the same time._    
  
“Did you two go somewhere?” She asked once more.  
  
“Yes. I took her out on a date.” Baekhyun snapped, I knew for sure that he was trying to control his temper.  
  
“Are you out of your mind?” She said in a slightly loud voice but later on cleared her throat. “Right in the middle of the issue about what happened to us in Paris? What if someone sees you with her? What would people say?”  
  
_Wow. How she sounded hurt, offended and concerned was amazing._  
  
“Nothing happened in Paris Ara.” He told her nonchalantly.  
  
“What do you mean nothing happened?” She asked him incredulously. “How would you explain the photos online?”  
  
“How about you explain it to me instead.” He told her in a still controlled voice. “I know you and Publisher Kim were behind it.” He let out of a sarcastic laugh.  
  
She absolutely looked alarmed, dazed.  
  
“I don’t know what you’re talking about Baekhyun.” She denied, looking away.  
  
“You really have to go this far? For what Ara?”  
  
“To make you realize that I’m still the one that you love.” She reasoned out in a slightly panicky voice. “You know you still do. That kiss, you felt something right?”  
  
_She sounded desperate._  
  
This was making me feel so uncomfortable, I wanted to leave but Baekhyun wouldn’t let me go by holding on to my hand tightly. I didn’t wanna be here. I didn’t want to witness this.  
  
“I clearly didn’t.” He said. “And you know that.”  
  
_I couldn’t imagine how knife-stabbing painful his word was for her._  
  
“So, you’d better do something about this. Tell everyone that there’s nothing going on between us and the photo was nothing but a misunderstanding. You know for sure what would happen if I do it myself.”  
  
She did not say anything for a moment but I saw how her hands balled into fists. She bit her lip as she glared at me for a second before turning to Baekhyun.  
  
“No one’s gonna believe it. How do you expect me to convince people that it was just a misunderstanding Baekhyun? How could a kiss caught on camera be a misunderstanding?”  
  
“It’s your problem. Why don’t you ask Publisher Kim to help you out since the two of you did well playing me anyway.” He sounded so bitter.  
  
“You’re going to make me a laughing stock. You know that right?”  
  
“None of these would’ve happened if you-”  
  
“If what?!” She intercepted, this time yelling.  
  
I slightly jumped on my feet and I felt Baekhyun squeezed my hand.  
  
“If I didn’t try to fight for you?” She trailed off to take a deep breath. “Can’t you see that I still love you Baekhyun?” She added as she stepped closer to hug him.  
  
I held my breath watching Baekhyun let go of my hand only to take hold of her arms so he could pull her away from him.    
  
“We’re done Ara. We have been for a long time.” He said while he had his hands on her.  
  
She looked at him unbelievably.   
  
“Are you serious?”  
  
“Dead serious.” He answered, letting go of her.  
  
Ara looked at him unbelievably and let out of a sarcastic laugh.  
  
“Her?” She said, pointing and glaring at me. “You’re ditching me because of her?”  
  
“I never gave you hope that we could happen again Ara.” Baekhyun answered as he took my hand once more and made me stand close to him. “And yes, she’s everything I want and need. She’s the only woman I ever want to be with.”  
  
I saw the formation of tears in her eyes but it was as if she was trying her best not to shed any. She was obviously mad and this was really stressing me out.  
  
“Miss Kim is right. You must be out of your mind. Can’t you see how different she is from us? Her world is way too different from ours. She wouldn’t survive your world Baekhyun. You know that… she’ll eventually leave you.”  
  
For some reasons, her words made more of an impact to me. And I couldn’t help but acknowledge the building anger inside me with the way she’s trying to speak for me. The way she was definitely looking down on me.   _I couldn’t hold it in any longer._ So, before I could even think things through, I opened my mouth to speak.  
  
“I’m not like you Ara.”  
  
I felt both Baekhyun and Ara’s eyes on me the moment I spoke.  
  
“You had him.” I gulped, trying my best to let the words out. “Yet you still chose to show affection to another man.”  
  
She looked at me with dagger eyes.  
  
“You have no right to speak to me this way.” She said in gritted teeth. “You don’t know me. You have no idea what Baekhyun and I went through. He loved me-”  
  
“Loved.” I intercepted. “Past tense.” I trailed off trying to keep my voice steady. “It’s funny how you acknowledge everything about you and Baekhyun was in the past yet you’re still here.”  
  
She looked as if she was ready to fight the next moment I met her eyes.  
  
“So you think you’re better than me? Huh?!” She told me with fiery eyes. “You think you could love him better than I do? Do you think you deserve someone like him when you’re nothing but some random girl he met?”  
  
“Ara stop.” Baekhyun demanded.  
  
“He’s going to let you go when things get hard! He’s going to choose his career over you!” She continued, ignoring him.  
  
“Ara I said stop.” I heard Baekhyun said once more.  
  
But then instead of stopping, she stepped towards me without a warning and grabbed me by the arm right away. I flinched at how tight her grip on my arm was. Though it only lasted for a few seconds because Baekhyun took her hands off me as soon as possible. Even when he was already trying to control her, she was still struggling to break free so she could get near me.  
  
_It scared me._  
  
“You don’t have the right to show up here and ruin everything!” She went on. “Go back to where you came from!”  
  
Then, I saw Mr. Yoo take Ara from Baekhyun.  
How he got here, I wasn’t so sure.  
  
Baekhyun stepped away and went back to where I was standing. She pulled me in his arms and asked me if I was okay. He looked extremely worried, mad and panicky at the same time. So, I nodded, hoping it would calm him down.  
  
“Don’t you ever lay a finger on her again!” He said in gritted teeth when he turned to face her once more. “And don’t ever talk to her the way you just did. You don’t have any right Ara. And if you ever hurt her again, in any way-”  
  
“Then what?!” She asked, this time sounding hysterical. “What Baekhyun, huh? Are really willing to risk everything for her?” Her tone was challenging.  
  
Baekhyun stayed quiet for the next couple of seconds.  
_And I didn’t know what to feel about it.  
I didn’t even know if I wanted him to say yes or not._  
  
“I knew it.” Ara let out of a soft laugh as she was shook Mr. Yoo’s hands away. “I knew you couldn’t. You couldn’t even risk it for me before...of course you won’t-”  
  
“Yes.” Baekhyun muttered making her stop mid-sentence.  
  
_Yes? Did he just say yes?_  
Speechless, I looked up to meet his eyes.  
  
“If I have to.” He said, his eyes boring into mine.  
  
I was too overwhelmed to say anything.  
_What? Did he really just say…  
No, Baekhyun…no. Please._  
  
“No.” It came from Ara. “No, you won’t.” She shook her head, refusing to believe what she just heard.  
  
“Yes Ara.” He told her, his jaw clenching. “I fucking would.”  
  
I saw how disbelief took over Ara’s face but I couldn’t dwell on it for long since I was busy trying to convince myself that he just said yes.  
  
No. He couldn’t have possibly said it.  
_Right?_  
“Mr. Yoo, kindly escort Ara outside.” He instructed as he wrapped an arm around me to take me inside.  
  
_I couldn’t say anything.  
I was too overwhelmed to function right now.  
_  
  
***  
  
Alone.  
I was on the couch sitting, my hands slightly trembling trying to process how everything that happened was real. _The look on Ara’s face when she grabbed me…_  
  
_Baekhyun telling her that he’s willing to risk everything for me._  
No. He probably didn’t mean it.  
He shouldn’t mean it.  
  
He appeared in front of me with a glass of water in his hand. He urged me to drink it and I got glass from him but instead of drinking, I ended up staring at him.  
  
For the first time, I looked and thought of him as the Byun Baekhyun of Korea. His celebrity version. The singer. The one that makes a lot of people happy.  
  
_No_.  
  
There were a pair of footsteps entering the living room and it made me snap out of my thoughts right away. It was Mr. Yoo. I looked directly at him while he alternately looked at me and Baekhyun. He had a big brown envelope in his hands that made me a thousand more uncomfortable.  
  
“What is it Mr. Yoo?” I heard Baekhyun asked.  
  
“This came in the mail this afternoon. But the thing is, this isn’t addressed to you Baekhyun…” He trailed off taking his eyes away from Baekhyun to me. “It’s for Hae Won.”  
  
I held my breath.  
_Why would something for me be sent to Baekhyun’s house?_  
  
“What?” Baekhyun asked as he stood to get the envelope from Mr. Yoo. “Why would it be addressed to her…” He paused when he finally checked the name written on him.  
  
I couldn’t see his reaction since he was facing the other way but I immediately felt that something was not right. I was anxious and it heightened when Baekhyun looked back at me, he didn’t say anything but the look on his face was already a confirmation. He walked towards the table before he unsealed the envelope and took what was inside.  
  
_Photos.  
They were photos._  
  
He took out the first one and it was a picture of me in the flower shop. I was standing on the doorway saying goodbye to a customer.  
  
_Oh god._  
  
The next photo was ours. It was at night. I was crossing the street towards Baekhyun who was standing next to his car. I instantly recognized it. It was that time when he asked me to sneak out of the house. It was the same night, Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye found out about us. There were two more photos of that moment. The next one was when he was hugging me and the third one was when he followed me to the house.  
  
I heard Baekhyun take a deep breath as he tilted his head down for a moment.  
  
“Fuck!” He hissed.  
  
_It sent shivers down my spine._  
_This can’t be real._  
  
The next set of photos were taken on the night after his concert.  
At the park when he was cupping my face with his hands.   
Then there was also a photo of me during his concert.  
The last one was taken last night. Right outside his house.  
We were facing each other, he was holding my hand.  
  
Oh god.  
There were too many photos.  
Unfiltered. Unedited.  
  
_How is this possible?  
This is too much.  
This shouldn’t be happening all at once._  
  
My head ached, I suddenly felt dizzy that I totally forgot about the glass of water I was holding. It slipped from my hand and immediately made a crashing sound when it hit the floor right next to my feet.  
  
Baekhyun turned to look at me.  
That look on his face.  
_How could I ever describe it?  
_  
_That familiar sinking feeling in my heart, again.  
The photos on the table. _  
  
“Hae Won…” I heard him call but my head started to focus on something else.    
  
“Baby, it’s okay. We’ll figure this out, okay?” I heard him say in a slightly panicked voice.  
  
The next thing I knew he was already hugging me, consoling me.   
  
I didn’t know what I was feeling at the moment.  
I wasn’t even sure if I was able to feel anything at all.  
  
“I promise, it’s going to be fine.” His voice was just above a whisper.   
  
Right before my tears totally blurred my vision, I was able to make up my mind.  
_There was no way I would allow him to risk everything for me.  
  
No.  
  
And as if he knew what was going on inside my head..._  
  
“Trust me, please.”  
  
  
  
~♥~   



	32. Thirty Two

  
Thirty Two

 

~♥~ 

  
  
2:24AM  
  
 _I felt him leaving the bed_  
  
…but I did not dare move and give him the hint that just like him, I couldn’t sleep as well. That I might probably never sleep tonight at all. Not after what happened tonight, not after the confrontation with Ara and discovering the photos. I had been anxious a lot lately but I was the most anxious now.  
  
 _How do we get through this? Is it even possible?_  
I never thought things would come to this.  
  
Overthinking, I thought of a lot of things. I even thought of going home right at the very instant but that would be crazy. I would only cause another problem if I get lost and get myself into another trouble, not that I wasn’t already.  
  
I could feel that void behind my chest again, the one that seemed to suck every little amount of positivity I have left. I hate feeling this, I hate that it seemed to drown me. It’s suffocating, like everything was closing in. I could barely breathe, so I got up and inhaled to fill my lungs with air. But it wasn’t enough as I felt my throat run dry.  
  
I got off the bed as I decided to get myself a glass of water and slowly made my way out of the room then all the way down to the kitchen.  
  
Right after drinking, I wondered how I didn’t see him around. I thought he’d be in the living room or somewhere but he wasn’t.  
  
 _Did he go somewhere?_  
  
I looked for him everywhere but I couldn’t find him. I even went to his study room but it was unoccupied as well. Worried, I went back to his room. I sat on the bed for a few minutes, spacing out a few times before I eventually lay down. Looking at the blank and dim ceiling, I thought of one thing… _Eun Chan._  
  
It has to be him. He’s behind those photos. There was no way this wasn’t his doing.  
 _Maybe I could talk to him and convince him…_  
  
 _And where’s Baekhyun?_ Did he have to go somewhere at this time? If yes, then this was serious. Well obviously it already was but… I sighed gloomily.  
  
I shut my eyes closed, I just wanted to sleep, drift away and forget about this for a moment. I couldn’t stand to think about what’s happening for another second. It felt like I was going to lose my mind any moment from now.  
  
I didn’t want any of this. I’ve lived an ordinary life and to be a part of this controversy was something my ordinary self could decipher. I wanted to call someone, someone I could talk to. My sister, or Lizzie or Auntie… but it’s two in the morning.  
  
 _Baekhyun_. I came to think about him again.

 _Where is he?_ _Did he leave me? Is he coming back?_

I felt so helpless now and I kept praying for a miracle that could get me to sleep.  
 _Sleep, I have never been desperate to fall asleep until now._  
  
  
***  
  
I didn’t know what time was it already when I felt him pull me in his arms. His familiar scent immediately filling my half-awake senses. I was too sleepy to open my eyes while I snuggle against him. He enveloped me with his arms and I was about to indulge in his warmth when I heard him speak.  
  
“Don’t leave me.”  
  
My half-conscious mind nevertheless absorbed what he just said and brought that familiar sinking feeling behind my chest.  
  
I felt him plant a kiss on my forehead.  
  
 _Oh, Baekhyun._  
  
***  
  
I cooked breakfast for him in the morning. We we’re in the kitchen and the whole time that I was busy preparing for something to eat, I noticed how he spaced out a few times. I didn’t really know what time he went back to bed last night. He looked like he didn’t have enough sleep.  
  
“Where did you go last night?” I asked him, trying to sound casual.  
  
“I…” He trailed off. “I went to see Kyungsoo.”  
  
“Why?”  
  
“I asked him to help me out with something.” He reasoned out. “I’m sorry, I didn’t tell you.”  
  
“It’s okay. I’m just worried you didn’t get enough sleep.”  
  
He got up and went to stand behind me. Without a warning, he draped his hands on my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder.  
  
“I wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway after what happened last night.”  
  
 _He’s right._  
  
“Is there something I could do to help Baek?”  
  
“Just stay by my side.” He answered, his voice soft. “Will you?”  
  
I nodded.  
  
His phone rang but before letting me go, he planted a small kiss on my cheek.  
  
***  
  
He’s been on the phone most of the time.  
  
Manager Kang came by and they talked in his study room for over an hour. I stayed in his room most of the time and had been contemplating whether to contact Eun Chan or not. After a fifteen-minute debate with myself, I ended up sending him a message to meet me. When he agreed, I went to tell Baekhyun that I have to go out to get myself something really important. I couldn’t tell him about Eun Chan and just had to make up a lame excuse. He had a lot on his plate right now and I wanted to make sure this was not one of them.  
  
He definitely did not sound convinced when I talked to him. He didn’t want me to go out afraid that something might happen to me but I insisted that it was something very necessary. He even offered to go with me but Manager Kang stopped him telling him that he shouldn’t be seen outside right now.  
  
Later on, I got him to allow me by asking Mr. Yoo to drive me to my destination, which I agreed to. I thought it’s better than not being able to go out at all.  
  
When I was in the car with Mr. Yoo, I asked him to drop me by at a particular address. He immediately wondered what I was going to do there since the place turned out to be a park. For some reason, I told Mr. Yoo that I was meeting someone but asked him not to tell Baekhyun.  
  
He, of course wasn’t comfortable with the idea that I was keeping this from Baekhyun but I explained how I didn’t want to burden him anymore. The man, thankfully seemed to understand me. He even told me to send him a message in case I need him.

“I’ll wait for you in the car Miss Park.”  
  
“Yes, Mr. Yoo. Thank you.”  
  
  
***  
  
1:15 PM  
  
 _It was cold._

I was wearing a thick sweater, scarf, pants and winter boots with a padded jacket over it. My hair was up in a loose ponytail which I somehow regretted since my face was exposed to the chilly wind.  
  
I walked towards the aligned benches of the park when Eun Chan and I agreed to meet. There were only a few people in the park and it was indeed a suitable place. I sat on one of the benches as I waited for him. I felt uncomfortable, trying to think of what to tell him. I didn’t really know how this would go. If he was indeed the one behind this, I would never forgive him.  
  
He arrived about seven minutes later. He looked very different, he was wearing a coat and tie with a black overcoat, exuding a very different aura from the one I had in mind.  
  
We both gazed at each other for a few seconds until I looked away.  
  
“Should I be happy that you wanted to see me?” He asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.  
  
“It’s you.” I told him right away. “Right? You were the one who sent the photos.”  
  
“Yes.” He admitted and I was surprised by how he didn’t even try to deny it.  
  
I was hurt. I couldn’t believe he could do something like this. Was he really the same man I used to adore and grew up with?  
  
“How could you do this to me?”  
  
“I’m doing this to save you.” He replied nonchalantly.  
  
“Save me from what?!” I said in a loud voice as my anger started to build up.  
  
He looked slightly taken aback with my reaction, he took his hands off his pockets and made a few steps towards me.  
  
“From him.”  
  
“My god Eun Chan…” I trailed off to brush my hair away from my face. “Can’t you see?” I looked at him intently. “He’s all I ever want. And I don’t care what else I had to go through-”  
  
I stopped talking when I saw him smirked sarcastically.  
  
“Can you hear yourself right now Hae Won?” He asked. “This is not you. Can’t you see what have you become?”  
  
I couldn’t believe he’s the one telling me this.  
  
“No, Eun Chan…you. What have you become?”  
  
He did not reply, he momentarily looked away instead. I waited for him to turn to me and say something but his reply wasn’t something I had expected.  
  
“I’m trying to make you see how difficult your life with him is and how easy it will be with me.”  
  
 _No. My heart sank._  
 _How is he this selfish?_  
  
“That’s not how it works.” I answered.

“No.” His reply came quick as he moved closer to me and stopped when he was right in front of me.  
  
He grabbed my arm and looked at me intently and I was too caught off guard to say anything nor break free from him.  
  
“Hae Won, you gotta wake up. I can save you from all of this. I can tell them not to release the photos and it won’t do any damage to you or to him. I can even help the issue he has with Ara. I can help cover it up if you ask me to. All you have to do is to break up with him.” He instructed breathlessly.  
  
I took a few seconds to stare at him and realized how he had become a stranger to me.  
 _I don’t know him anymore. He’s not the man in my memory. He had become a monster._  
  
“I am not breaking up with him.” I said in a firm voice, tears forming in my eyes.   
  
His hold on me loosened until he finally let me go. He took a deep breath and mocked me by letting out of a soft laugh.  
  
“I told your parents.”  
  
I held my breath.

 _He told who?_  
  
“I told them how you’re associated with someone involved with someone like him.”  
  
 _He told my parents…_ I forced my brain to process the information.  
  
“I even sent them some of the photos.” He added.  
  
My blood suddenly ran cold thinking how my parents already knew about this. I couldn’t think properly, I couldn’t even breathe properly.  
  
 _No. No. No. Not my family._  
  
Silence was what took over between us the next couple of minutes. My knees weakened, my vision blurred due to the tears pooling in my eyes.  
  
“Are you crazy?” I asked when I finally found my voice. “Why would you do that? Why are you doing this to me?” I added as I wiped my already tear-stained cheeks.  
  
He just stared at me.  
  
“Why Eun Chan!?” I said, almost yelling.  
  
“Because I love you.”  
  
I closed my eyes, filling my lungs with air.  
  
“How can you call this love?” I asked when I opened my eyes and met his. “This is not love.” I moved my head sideways. “This is being selfish.”  
  
He shrugged.  
  
“Maybe this is me being selfish. But is it wrong when all I want to do is save the person I love from being hurt?”  
  
I did not say anything. I was so angry, I couldn’t form coherent thoughts at the moment.  
  
“Do you know how many harsh comments will you read every day about you once the photos are publicized? People will judge you and criticize you.” His eyes were piercing through mine. “How do you think I’d feel about that? Do you expect me to just sit and not do anything?”  
  
“So blackmailing me is what you call saving?” I glared at him, my hands forming into fists on my side.  
  
“If this is what it takes.” He stated. “Yes.”  
  
I forced myself to stop crying, wiped my cheeks using the back of my hands.  
  
“I never…” I paused to muster every bit of courage I had. “Loved you nor will I love you like I love Baekhyun.” I said, meaning every word that came out of my mouth.  
  
He looked afflicted for a moment.  
  
I didn’t wait for his reply anymore, I turned around to leave as I try to shut my ears when I heard him call me. I didn’t turn around but the next thing I knew, he grabbed me by the wrist and started to take me the other way.  
  
I was dumbfounded for a moment as I unbelievably stared at him.  
  
“If I had to literally drag you out of this mess, I’ll do it.” He said, determined.

“Let me go!” I protested, trying my best to take his hand off me. “I’m not going anywhere with you!”  
  
He continued to walk ahead, ignoring me. And he was too strong, I couldn’t break free no matter how much I struggled to do so. I felt so helpless, I started crying again.  
  
Then, I felt a pair of hands push Eun Chan away, he ended up about a couple of feet away from me, on the ground. 

 _Mr. Yoo._ I thought of him first but the same pair of hands pulled me closer and draped an arm around me. His scent immediately letting me realize that it’s none other than _Baekhyun._

I looked up to check his face. He was wearing a black bucket hat but I could see his jaw clenching in anger. His breathing ragged as his hand around me tightened.  
  
 _What is he doing here?_ _He wasn’t supposed to be here. He was instructed not to go out but he’s here right now._  
  
“Stay away from her!” He said and I could feel the rage in his tone.

I shivered, scared how this would end since he was furious. When I turned to look at Eun Chan, I saw him getting on his knees as he threw a smug look at us.  
  
“Oh, so we finally met Byun Baekhyun.” Eun Chan stated. “I heard so much about you. How’s Kim Ara? You must have missed each other very much.”  
  
It was obvious that he was mocking Baekhyun. I saw how Baekhyun’s free hand formed into a fist. I got scared he might kick Eun Chan’s ass, not that I cared about Eun Chan at all, I just wanted to make sure Baekhyun wouldn’t get into more trouble.  
  
So I lifted my hands and cupped his face to get his attention.  
  
“Baek, don’t listen to him. Just get me out of here. Please.” I pleaded.  
  
“You really think you can protect her?” Eun Chan said, taking both of our attentions. “You’re fooling yourself Baekhyun.” He smirked. “You know that I’m the only one who can do that.”  
  
“Don’t you ever touch her again.” Baekhyun replied in gritted teeth, ignoring Eun Chan’s remarks.  
  
“How do you sleep at night knowing she’s suffering?” Eun Chan asked. “You probably don’t care, right?”  
  
I felt Baekhyun’s body twitched as he attempted to advance and grab Eun Chan but I used all my strength to stop him again.  
  
“No, Baek please. Don’t.” I begged once more. “He’s not worth it. This is not worth it.”  
  
 _I didn’t want to cause him another trouble. We couldn’t afford to have another one._  
Eun Chan was working for a broadcasting company and he could make a big deal out of this. He'd use it against him.  
  
“Let’s just go. Please.” I added as I hugged him tighter. “Please.” I didn't know what else to do to stop him.  
  
Thankfully, I felt him relax as he took my hand as we turned to the other side to leave.   
  
“Once the photos are out, she’ll realize that she made a mistake for choosing you. Then, she’ll eventually leave you and your chaotic world! She will realize that what you feel for her is not enough to make up for the suffering she has to go through…”  
  
Eun Chan’s words faded away as the distance between us increased.  
  
***  
  
He drove us out of the park and head back home right away. Even when I was getting out of his car, I was still too speechless.  
We were already in the living room when I heard him speak.  
  
“Manager Kang and I will make sure the photos won’t come out.” He said. “We’re already figuring things out.”  
  
I didn’t know what to feel about what he just said. _This already felt like a war._  
  
“What were you doing out there?” I asked him, not really knowing how my brain came up with this. “Manager Kang told you not go out since it’s very risky, right?”  
  
He did not answer and just gazed at me.  
  
“What if someone saw you there a while ago? What if someone took a photo of what happened again?”  
  
I couldn’t explain why but I felt so frustrated and angry and hurt, devastated at the same time. My feelings were a mess, I was mad.  
  
“I can’t keep causing you trouble.” I said before I walked away to go to his bedroom.  
  
***  
  
I was in the bathroom, looking at my reflection and had just finished washing my face.  I wasn’t crying, I was too tired to cry. I couldn’t even think of any coherent thought right now. With the way things had been happening, I just didn’t know which one to entertain.  
  
I didn’t know how long I had been in there, I lost track of time. But when I got out, I immediately saw him. He was sitting on the bed, facing the door of the bathroom. He had his both hands on his head and it was obvious that he was having a hard time. Maybe he had been thinking things through. No, scratch maybe, he had been overthinking too.  
  
He looked up and met my eyes, and the world seemed to stop. Everything seemed to fade away around us as I focused on nothing but him. I watched his sad face and it broke my heart to think of how his face used to be filled with happiness. How he smiled beautifully before, how his smile reached his eyes…  
  
 _His eye smiles, I wasn’t sure when was the last time I saw it._

I felt guilty to have caused his this.  
 _I thought of just leaving and free him from all of this…_  
  
But then my feet, having a mind of their own, moved to closer to him until I was in front of him. He looked up and stared at me for a moment before he hesitantly held my hand, his fingers played with mine for a second and when I came to entangle them with his, he tugged on it and pulled me closer. I stood in between his legs before he rested his head on my stomach.  
  
“Forgive me.” He muttered, his voice was low but it was crystal clear in my ears. “I love you. I love you. I love you. Forgive me.”  
  
I closed my eyes realizing how he must have felt the same way I did.  
We both felt guilty for causing each other suffering.   
  
 _Should love be like this?_  
  
***  
  
He was scheduled to go to Japan for a two day concert. He obviously didn’t want to go and I didn’t too. But we both knew that it had been scheduled and he had people waiting for him there. The two-day concert was already sold out and it only meant he had to leave. I also told him that I will go back to Auntie’s house. He offered to take me home but that would be too much for him. His flight was a couple of hours away and it was impossible for him to drive me home or even to the station so we both agreed to have Mr. Yoo take me to the train station instead.  
  
We were in the parking lot, inside the car Mr. Yoo was going to use to drive me to the station. We were alone in the backseat though, since he asked Mr. Yoo to give us a moment.  
  
“I’ll be back right after the concert.” He assured, as he held my hand tightly before taking it to his mouth for a quick kiss.  
  
I nodded.  
  
“If there was any way, I don’t have to leave…”  
  
“Baek, it’s okay.” I intercepted. “Don’t worry about me. Just do your best okay? And don’t get hurt. Make sure you eat on time.”  
  
He smiled.  
  
“Yes mom.”  
  
The corner of my lips turned upward as well.  
  
“I’ll miss you.” I said, unable to stop myself.  
  
The expression on his face softened, a sad look in his eyes.  
  
“I miss you.” He replied as he pulled me into a hug. “Already.”  
  
I closed my eyes, trying to savour this moment. I even hugged him tighter.  
  
“You’re going to wait for me, right baby?”  
  
 _A pang in my heart._  
  
“Yes.” I uttered as I nod.  
  
When we broke the hug, he brought his hands to cup my face and leaned closer to kiss my mouth. His lips brushed against mine softly at first before it turned steady and firm. He detached his lips from mine to stare at me for a brief second.  
  
If the rest of the world wasn’t waiting for him, I’d ask him to kiss me more. I’d ask him to stay with me. I’d ask him not to go…  
  
 _But that isn’t the case here.  
The world is waiting._  
  
He continued to gaze at me with loving and longing eyes. I shut my eyes closed as I leaned in to give him one last, quick kiss.  
  
“Go.” I told him afterwards. “They’re waiting for you.”

He removed his hands from cupping my face and definitely looked like, he didn’t want to go. So, I gave him a reassuring smile.  
  
He pulled me into another tight hug before getting off the car. The moment he closed the door behind him, my separation anxiety peaked.  
  
 _I took a deep breath. My heart sinking, deeper._  
  
***

When Mr. Yoo stopped the car. He gave me a brotherly smile. And I thought for a moment how thankful I was for his life. He was always there for Baekhyun and even for me.  
  
“Thank you Mr. Yoo.” I told him.  
  
“Anytime Miss Park.”  
  
“Please take care of Baekhyun, okay?”

His forehead creased, probably wondering why I sounded the way I sounded.  
  
“I mean, you’re going to Japan too right? Please take care of him, like you always had.”  
  
He looked relieved. “Okay Miss Park, I’ll protect him harder this time, for you.” He replied, smiling.  
  
***  
I just bought a ticket and I didn’t know what had gotten into me for wanting to take the train an an hour and thirty minutes later. I was taking the way to the waiting area when my phone rang.  
  
 _It was an overseas call._  
It only meant one thing… Mom.  
  
My heartbeat raced, as I stared at my phone. I thought of not answering it but it would only worsen things, so I did.  
  
“Mom.” I hesitated.  
  
“Where are you? You’re not at Sunny’s house, are you?” She sounded angry.  
  
“Mom, wait…”  
  
“Listen to me young lady, book a flight and go home.”  
  
“Mom, please wait let me explain.”  
  
“No, you’re going home as soon as possible.” She said firmly. “All your explaining will happen here in Australia, so-”  
  
“Mom!” I said loudly, wanting to catch her attention and make her stop talking.  
  
There was silence.  
  
“I don’t know what Eun Chan told you or what pictures he sent you but please believe me Baekhyun is a good man. He didn’t mean any of this to happen. I swear, just give us a chance.”  
  
She didn’t say anything for a brief moment.  
  
“Mom, please.”  
  
“You are going home.” It was all that she said right after ending the call.  
  
The beep indicating that the line was already disconnected caused my shoulders to slump.

I was left taking a deep breath.  
  
 _Can this get any worse?_  
  
***  
  
I was sitting on the bench, waiting for my train to arrive, trying my best to forget the conversation with my mom when someone sat I felt someone occupied the space next to me. I curiously turned to check who it was since the person really sat close to me when there were other unoccupied benches.  
  
To my surprise, I saw Manager Kang. He momentarily looked at me before he fixed his attention ahead. He was wearing a cap and I thought right, he must not be seen talking to a woman since a lot of people knew his connection to Baekhyun.  
  
“I thought you’re with Baekhyun.” I hesitated, not really knowing how to start the conversation.  
  
“I’m heading to Japan this afternoon. I stayed behind so I could talk to you.” He replied as he turned to look at me.  
  
 _Did Baekhyun ask him to talk to me?  
Or was it the company who sent him?  
I don’t really know anymore._  
  
***  
  
We were in a café.

There weren’t a lot of people inside and we took the table on the right, the one that’s not so exposed to customers. I was anxious as I wait for Manager Kang to tell me why he wanted to talk to me. I didn’t really have a good feeling about this but I knew how he’s on Baekhyun’s side all this time so I just didn’t really know what to expect.  
  
“He’s so determined to fight for you Hae Won.” He finally said. “He said that if he had to reveal your relationship to the public, he’d do it. Are you okay with it?”  
  
 _I gulped. Oh god._  
I couldn’t answer and just tilted my head down, fixing my attention on the iced Americano in front of me.  
  
“I know that you know the price he has to pay for it.” He continued. “I am hoping that for some miracle, people will accept your relationship but with all the news and the feedback the rumour of him being in a relationship with a non-celebrity is receiving right now…” He trailed off and I didn’t know what made him since I never took my attention off my coffee. “We should expect for the worst.”  
  
 _I knew.  
I knew fully well how this was going to impact Baekhyun’s career. _  
  
And honestly, I’m sure as hell that I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if he lost everything he worked hard for. And this was the very reason why I couldn’t even utter a response to his manager right now.  
  
“I hope you don’t get me wrong Hae Won.” Manager Kang continued. “I know that you are madly in love with each other. And if I had to be very honest with you right now, I like you for Baekhyun. He’s genuinely happy when he’s with you. I hope you two never have to go through this.”  
  
I heard him sigh and it made me look at him. His shoulders were slumped as he leaned on the chair. He took his hat off and I noticed how stressed he looked at the moment.  
  
This wasn’t easy for him too. I knew how much he cared for Baekhyun. He was like an older brother and seeing Baekhyun suffer like this might have a bigger impact on him too, more than I realize.  
  
“But I’ve been with him since day one. And I’ve seen how hard he worked his ass off just to get to where he is right now. I’m not sure if he’s indeed making the right decision here.”  
  
I bit my lip, fully aware of what he meant exactly.  
  
“But I can’t make him give up on you Hae Won…that would be impossible. He’ll never do that…” He met my eyes. “Not in this lifetime.”  
  
I took a deep breath, trying to win over that familiar sinking feeling in my heart.  
  
“A...are you saying I have to do it?” I stuttered, finally having the guts to speak for the first time.  
  
He suddenly looked like he was going to lost it. He leaned and rested his elbows on the table and brought his hands to his head.  
  
“I don’t know Hae Won.” He said, moving his head sideways. “I don’t even know what I’m trying to do here exactly.” He added, his attention on the table. “To be very honest, I don’t want you to leave him. I know he’d be devastated the moment you leave and he probably won’t forgive me ever if he knew that I came to see you about this but…” He inhaled, straightened his sit and looked at me. “I had a meeting with the different department heads yesterday and they told me they’d…they’d terminate his contract if he does something crazy.”  
  
My heart beat so loud and fast, and everything seemed to have stopped moving around me.  I couldn’t even hear my own thoughts for a second.  
  
“And by crazy, they mean him announcing about your relationship.” I heard Manager Kang added, snapping me out of my own thoughts.   
  
 _Terminate his contract…  
Can I afford to cause him this much?_  
  
“I’m sorry you had to know about this.” He told me, remorse evident in his tone. “But I just can’t stay still. I tried to talk him out of this but knowing Baekhyun, he’d go all out and it will be very messy for him and even for you.”  
  
I could feel a lump forming in my throat, my heart still beating wild behind my chest. My face was heating, having all the urge to cry but I did my best to stop my tears.

“Does he know?” I asked, though I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to know the answer.  
  
Manager Kang looked back at me with obvious concern on his face before he nodded.  
  
“Yes, he knows.” He took a deep breath. “And I doubt he’s changing his mind.”  
  
I bit my lip.  
 _He’s really doing it._ He was going to let it all go.  
 _All for me? But do I deserve it?  
God, Baekhyun._  
  
I suddenly felt my blood run cold as I process every word that I heard from Manager Kang.  
  
“If…” I muttered when I finally had the strength, making an extra effort to keep my voice steady. “If I do it…” I gulped, I swear it was really hard to even talk about it. “If I break up with him…”  
  
 _God, I can’t believe I was saying this right now._  
  
I saw how uncomfortable Manager Kang looked right after I said those words. .   
  
“Can you promise me to look after him?”  
  
 _I could feel every part of me falling apart._  
  
“Hae Won…” He opened his mouth but ended up closing it when he couldn’t find the words to say next.  
  
He looked guilty. He was probably thinking that this was all his fault.  
  
“Promise me Manager Kang.” I insisted. “Don’t leave him. Don’t let him do anything stupid. Tell him he’s gonna find someone better than me. Someone the public will like and there won’t be a need for him to sacrifice anything.”  
  
My tears unstoppably rolled down my cheeks, they were just too heavy, my eyes couldn’t seem to take the weight anymore. And the lump in my throat was already too painful to ignore.  
  
He nodded and despite how overwhelmed I was, I noticed despair in his eyes. This man cared for Baekhyun so much I knew he wasn’t doing this for himself.  
  
“I promise Hae Won.” He muttered, meeting my eyes.  “I’m really sorry you have to go through this.”  
  
Hearing an apology from him triggered me to cry harder this time. I couldn’t stop myself anymore, I couldn’t control my emotions and finally just gave in to everything that hurt inside of me. Desperate to hide my face, I rested my head on the table over my crossed arms and cried my heart out.  
  
 _My heart, I felt it being crushed into a million pieces.  
But it was as if every piece was also begging me not to do it.  
   
I’m so sorry.   
I’m so sorry.  
I’m so sorry.  
  
May he forgive me for what I'm about to do. _  
  
  


~♥~   
  
  
AN: Hello Loves! Here you go. This update is actually a two-chapter update so I'll be posting another one later. But, do tell me what you think about this. 


	33. Thirty Three

Thirty Three  
  
  
  
~♥~   
  
  


  
  
5:46PM  
  
I was in my room, sitting and facing the mirror on the vanity table. I stared at my reflection. My eyes were puffy, my nose and cheeks were red from crying. I silently shed tears on the train and even after I came home.

Aunt Sunny and Jihye weren’t home since they had to visit a relative in another town and wouldn’t be home until tomorrow morning, Uncle Jinwoo was still at work so I had the whole house to myself.  
  
I cried, so hard the moment I reached my room. And as I gave in to this vulnerability, I remembered everything that happened recently. From Ara to Eun Chan, my mom, Manager Kang, the news and the possible aftereffects…  
  
Baekhyun and his career…  
  
 _My god, I swear I’m losing my mind._  
  
My phone was right in front of me. I held it in my hands for a few times but ended up putting it back on the table, not having the heart to call him.  
  
 _I can’t do this._ _I can’t fucking do this.  
I can’t break up with him again. I cannot handle it.  
No, I don’t wanna leave him…_  
  


But then, as I thought of Baekhyun during his concerts and remembered the sparkle in his eyes when he performed, the glow on his face when he talked to his fans…his laughter on TV, his songs, his voice…  
It would not be fair if I had him all to myself. I wouldn’t be happy knowing he risked something he loved for me.  
  
 _I can’t be selfish.  
How is this love right when he had to lose something important to him in exchange?  
Maybe this is wrong, maybe meeting him is.  
Maybe going back to Korea is. _  
  
Wiping my tear-stained cheeks, I took my phone in my hand once more and with slightly trembling hands, I went to my contacts and pressed on his number.  
  
 _I felt my heart being gripped._    
  
I took a deep breath, undeniably not ready for the heartbreak that would come the moment I hear his voice. For one second, I prayed that he wouldn’t pick up the call. _I wasn’t ready._  
  
“Hi Baby.” He answered on the third ring.  
  
He sounded so glad I called and the affection in his voice made me lost it.  
  
“Did you call because you missed me already?” He teased.  
  
With blurred vision due to tears, I covered my mouth as I started crying once more. I was afraid that he would have the slightest idea of my breakdown.  
  
“Hey…” He muttered. “Baby, is everything okay? Are you home?”  
  
I gulped, hoping I could get the words I need to say out.    
 _How do I even start with this?_  
  
“Are you crying?” He asked, all of a sudden.  
  
He was obviously worried and I couldn’t take this anymore. I took the phone away from my ear so I could sob freely as I wiped the tears from my eyes, since they just wouldn’t stop from flowing.

 _I was not ready to do this. No, the truth was, I would never be ready for breaking his heart._  
  
“Baek…” It took every ounce of energy I have left to reply.  
  
 _My voice instantly gave me away._  
  
“Baby, why are you crying? Tell me what’s wrong.”  
  
“I’m sorry.” It was all that I could say.  
  
 _No. No. Park Hae Won, don’t you do this. Please._  
The part of me that loved him so hard wanting to break free.  
  
“What are you sorry for?” He sounded confused. “I...I don’t understand, is something wrong? Did something else happen?” His consecutive questions was somehow gave me a hint that he knew what was about to happen.  
  
I took a deep breath as my free hand reached for my chest. It hurt so much, I thought my heart was going to explode any moment from now.  
  
 _Please._ _NO. Please._  
  
“Hae Won.” He muttered, his voice serious. “Tell me this is not what I think this will be about…Please.”  
  
The way he said _please_ …  
  
“I’m sorry Baek…” I apologized once more before I paused to bite my lip to supress my sobbing.  
  
“Baby no, please…” His panicked voice filled my ear. “Stop-”  
  
"Let’s break up." I added in a barely audible voice.

There was a brief silence…  
 _One, two…four seconds._

"What are you talking about?" In denial was evident in his tone.

I was sitting but I could still feel my knees weaken at his remarks.

 _This was too much._  
  
"Let's break up, Baekhyun." I said once more as I mustered the remaining courage I have left. “Let’s end this.”  
  
 _Three seconds._

"Wait...how-you....you don't mean it, do you?" He stuttered and I could just sense how this was making him feel right now. “Why are you doing this all of a sudden? We were fine this morning right? You even told me you’re going to wait for me. How come you’re talking about breaking up now?”  
  
 _It was almost as if I could hear his heart breaking._  
  
"Let's stop seeing each other.” I replied, my voice almost broken.  “Don't come looking for me anymore."  
  
 _It was like stabbing my own heart. No, I was actually stabbing my own heart._

"Wait Hae Won." He stated. "Why are you doing this? Did someone tell you to do this? Did someone talk you out of this? Was it Eun Chan? Ara? Someone from the company? Who?"

“No Baekhyun.” I shook my head as if he could see me.  
  
I heard him sigh and it took him a couple of seconds to speak once more.  
  
“You do know that this is unfair right? You’re breaking up with me on the phone. Why now? Why, when I’m miles away from you…when I can’t do anything to stop you from leaving…”  
  
 _I know I was being unfair._  
I couldn’t stand the undeniable pain I could sense in his tone. I could just imagine how afflicted he looked right now.  
  
"This is tiring. I'm tired of all of this." I reasoned out, desperate to find a better excuse. “I’m tired of crying. Just let me go. I can’t deal with this anymore.”  
  
I could feel him walking back and forth, his breathing a bit ragged.  
  
“We already talked about this already right? I told you and promised you that I’ll fix things. We’ll get through this together. I don’t get why you’re telling me this now?”  
  
He sighed.  
  
“Baby. If I had to tell the world that I’m with you, I would. If that’s the only way we could be free. I’m going to tell everyone that I don’t have any sort of relationship with Ara anymore and that you’re my woman.”  
  
I didn’t answer as I closed my eyes, biting my lip to keep myself from sobbing.  
  
“C’mon Hae Won, don’t do this.” He was practically begging.

"Baekhyun. You know that this is not gonna work out. I'm sorry." I forced the words out of my thoughts and barely had the strength to verbalize them.

I was sure I heard him sob.  
  
 _I hate myself._  
I undeniably and utterly hate myself for doing this to him.  
  
"Baby, I’ll be home in a couple of days. Wait for me, please. Let's at least talk about this when I arrive in Korea, okay? Not now."  
  
He sounded so sad, I swear it was killing me.

"No Baek. I won’t wait for you."

"Hae Won..."  
  
The way he sounded when he said my name was excruciating.

_I couldn’t stand talking and hearing his voice any longer._

"Goodbye, Baekhyun." I bid.  
  
Then, without giving him a change to reply anymore.  
  
 _I ended the call._  
  
I stood and walked towards my bed but instead of sitting on it, I bent my legs and sat on the floor with my back leaning on the bed as I continued to break down.  
  
My phone, which was still in my hand, rang. His name on my screen. I looked at it for a brief moment, tempted to answer and hear his voice again but I ended up putting it on the bed, far enough so I couldn’t easily reach it.  
  
It stopped ringing only to start once more.

 _And again.  
And again.  
Again._  
  
My crying mixed with the sound of my phone and ignoring it made me hysterical. So, I mustered all the remaining courage that I have left to turn off my phone.

"I'm so sorry." I said in between sobs.  
  
I couldn’t imagine how he felt right now.  
He’s in Japan and he was about to perform on his concert tomorrow.  
It was cruel to put him through this.  
  
 _I just broke his heart.  
Probably as broken as mine right now._

 _Unforgivable._  
 _This is._  
  
***  
  
That night when Uncle Jin Woo saw me in the kitchen when we were eating dinner, I knew he wanted to ask me about how I looked. My eyes were puffy and my voice was hoarse from crying yet for some reason, he didn’t. I knew he was concerned but he was probably also too hesitant to ask me. I also kept spacing out the whole time and didn’t really have the right appetite to eat so I just waited for him to finish eating so I could wash the dishes.  
  
As I was left alone in the kitchen, I couldn’t help but remember the last time Baekhyun was here. How he was so hungry at that time, he got us both in trouble. I recalled how pale he looked at me when he saw a petrified Ji Hye, unbelievably staring at him before Aunt Sunny joined us and made matters worse.  
  
I swear, I was so tired of crying but standing alone in the kitchen with my thoughts filled with our memories here together was triggering every part of me that’s sane to give in all at once.  
  
I walked to my room as fast as I could but stopped when I reached the door. It was as if I could see him standing, holding on to the doorknob with a playful smile on his lips just like the last time he teased me asking me if we weren’t really going to _do it._  
  
 _I am certain that this is how it’s going to be in the coming days._  
 _How am I supposed to survive this?_  
  
There was no way, I’d survive this.  
  
***

The next couple of days were unbearable. I couldn’t hide and keep pretending so I told my aunt about my break up with Baekhyun. I poured everything out to her, I was so hurt and in pain I’d go crazy if I hold it all in. I knew Ji Hye was too scared to ask me why I was acting this way so I also told her that Baekhyun and I were over. When she cried, asking why, I told her and did my best to explain to her that none of this was Baekhyun’s fault. I didn’t know how she took it and I couldn’t blame her from feeling heartbroken as well.  
  
I stayed away from my phone the best way I could. I knew Baekhyun had been calling me and it took every ounce of control I had not to answer them. I didn’t even read his messages.

  
 _I hope my feelings die just like how my phone died when it ran out of battery._  
  
***  
  
10:14 AM  
  
 _It was a Tuesday Morning._  
  
It’s been three days since I broke up with Baekhyun. Nothing’s better. Honestly, I wasn’t sure how it’d get better. It was impossible. I had been trying my best to divert my attention to other things but as expected, I keep failing. I tried to listen to music but the first music that played was his song.  
  
 _He’s everywhere. Especially in my thoughts._  
 _I think about him every time. Like every fucking time. I don't know what else to do._

I was at the shop, busy arranging the flowers alone since Aunt Sunny was inside. I didn't know I was crying again until I felt a tear rolled down my cheek. I immediately wiped it with the back of my hand afraid that a customer might see me. However, I realized that it was too late when I heard someone walked.

"Excuse Me." I heard someone called.

Flustered, I turned around and saw a teenage boy. It's Soo Jin. A fourteen year old who lived a few blocks from us. I often see him around here and I noticed how he would always have his eyes on his phone even when he’s walking on the street. And that was what he’s exactly doing right now. He seemed to be playing something on his phone.  
  
"Yes Soo Jin?" I asked as I tried to steady my voice. "Are you going to buy flowers?"

"No." He answered briefly, his eyes still on his phone, his fingers busy. 

"So, how can I help you?" My forehead creased.

"Someone asked me to call you." He replied in a very straightforward manner.

My heart started to hammer right away upon hearing the word _someone._

"Who?" I hesitated.  
  
 _Please, let it not be Baekhyun. I was silently praying._

The boy shrugged.  
  
"He's in the car." He replied as her briefly took his attention from his phone and looked across the street.

There was a sleek, black Audi across the street. The sight of the car in front of the shop turned out to be a painful thing to see as well.  
  
 _It’s him.  
It’s Baekhyun._  
  
Just knowing that he was here, a few feet away from me.  
 _God, I won’t survive this._  
  
"Okay Soo Jin, just go home." I panicked, turning away from him to the flowers.

"What should I tell him?"

"I don't know. Tell him I'm busy. Just tell him anything.” I replied breathlessly, looking at the boy again.  
  
 _I shouldn’t see him._ _Not yet. Not now._

"He told me that if you won't go out, he'll go out of the car all the way here." The boy warned his eyes still not leaving his phone.

_I was taken aback, my brain lagging for a brief second._

"He said that?" I asked, nervous.

Soo Jin nodded.

I tensed debating if Baekhyun would really do it. I checked the street and there were more people than usual. He would grab attention and get noticed the moment he got out of his car.  
  
 _Then I made up my mind.  
No. He wouldn't do it. If he did, then he’d really be in trouble.  
He wouldn't risk it._

"No." I muttered, convinced that he wouldn’t do it. "Tell him to leave. And tell him not to come back again Soo Jin, okay?"

 _He wouldn’t do it, I kept repeating it in my head and I was pretty sure I was trying to convince no one but myself._    
He's Byun Baekhyun.  
He shouldn’t be out here in broad daylight. He wouldn’t dare walk across the street.  
  
Soo Jin was still in the shop with me. He's leaning at the counter and I don't need to look at him to know that his eyes were still on his phone. 

I took a deep breath as I took out the roses from the pail and put them on the table to check them before displaying.  For some reason, I briefly forgot about Baekhyun and the very reason why Soo Jin was here. I was beginning to concentrate on the flowers when for the first time I noticed the boy removed his attention from his phone. He looked up and turned to the entrance.

"See, I told you so." I heard Soo Jin's fading voice.  
  
 _I couldn’t believe it._

 _He's here. He's really here._ He was wearing a plain, long sleeved beige shirt, slightly fitting navy blue pants that were ripped on the knees, white _Nike Shoes_ and his signature black bucket hat.  
  
I was processing it all in. How he’s right in front of me right now. Then to my surprise, he slowly removed the bucket hat. Revealing his entire bare Byun Baekhyun face with a pair of gold specs.  
  
 _I felt my heart sank. He’s here._

His eyes immediately bore into mine and it almost caused me to breakdown right away. I missed him so bad, I wanted to run to him right now. I wanted to tell him that I didn’t mean anything I said and that I wanna be with him.

However, panic has taken over me the next second as I caught a glimpse of Soo Jin, who was already looking intently at Baekhyun as if trying to recognize him.

"Soo Jin, please-"

"Too Late, I already know him." I almost froze because of his remark.  
  
What the boy did right after almost gave me a heart attack. He showed me his phone with a full screen picture of Baekhyun.

"Oh my god." I gasped.  
  
Rattled, I immediately dragged Baekhyun by the arm from the entrance of the shop and made him stand somewhere a little bit hidden.

"Weren't you thinking?!" I glared at Baekhyun.

"I wasn't." He answered nonchalantly.  
  
I gulped, realizing how much I missed his voice. I also noticed how I was holding on to his arm and I instantly had to dismiss the urge to cry in his arms. So, I hesitantly let go of him.  
  
"What else do I have to lose anyway?" He added and I sensed a hint of exhaustion in his tone.

It was just then I noticed how he really looked. He looked like he went here straight from the airport. His eyes don't have the usual glow. He looked downcast. His hair, it's dishevelled. This was not the usual Baekhyun. His aura was totally different.  And it hurt to even think about it but he… _he looked like he had been crying too._

 _My heart sank deeper this time as I saw heartbreak in his eyes._  
  
Then I heard Soo Jin cleared his throat.

"Soo Jin…” I trailed off to go to him. “Tell me whatever you want, just don't say anything about it to anyone. Please."

"You don't have to do anything for me." The boy replied in a matter of fact tone.

"What?" My forehead creased, surprised.

"Just go talk to him. He looks devastated." He said, his eyes focused on Baekhyun.  
  
I turned around to stare at Baekhyun for a moment. I refuse to think that he came all the way from Japan, straight from his concert last night. He’s had been pushing his limits. I knew this. He had been since we got together, trying to make up for his busy schedule.  
  
"My Sister liked him very much." Soo Jin added, taking my full attention with him.

My heart suddenly felt heavier after realizing that the boy was referring to his older sister who died from a car accident a year ago. 

_Gosh, this made me feel worse._

"I am not leaving unless you go with him."  
  
Soo Jin, at such a young age, seemed to know what he's doing.  Helpless, I turned to I look at Baekhyun once more who did nothing but gaze at me the whole time.

 _Looks like I'm in for another heart breaking moment._  
  
I sighed in defeat.  
 _God, please let me survive this._  
  
***

I got in the car with him.

 _I was trying my hardest to be strong._  
I could feel him watching me intently while I put the seatbelt on. I refused to meet his eyes so I saw him turned to the wheel and revved the engine on instead.

Being alone with him in his car was already too much to handle. I didn't know how I would be able to stop myself from breaking down. I wanted to succumb to my weakness, I wanted to just let this pretense go.

_I guess the question really was how I long would I be able to hold it in._

After about twenty minutes of silent drive, I had the feeling that he was taking me to the old hiking place so I told him not to bring me there.

"Why?" He asked, his forehead creasing.

"Let's not ruin that place." I told him honestly.

That place was full of wonderful memories. It would be so tragic if we take whatever we’re supposed to talk about there.

He stepped on the brake immediately and stopped the car on the side of the road. Then he rested his head on the steering wheel. He did it for a couple of seconds.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, though I knew.

"We have nowhere else to go other than that place.” He straightened his sit, momentarily glancing at me before looking ahead. “So what's the point of driving?" He sounded really frustrated.

I sighed as I look around outside. We were on the outskirts of the town. I was pretty sure no one would see us here, so I didn't protest anymore. We stayed in the car for a few moments, none of us moving nor talking. Then he unbuckled his seatbelt and went outside. I watched him get off and closed the door. I stared at him from the passenger's seat for a while as he stood in front of the hood of the car.  
  
I balled my clammy hands into fists, resisting the urge to cry.  
  
 _There was no way this would end easy._  
  
 I inhaled, filling my lungs with as much as air, hoping to prepare myself for what was going to happen, before I got out.  
  
His eyes were on me as I got out and waited for me to get closer.  

"What are you doing here Baekhyun?" I asked him, trying my best to sound casual as possible when I was a foot away from him.  
  
I instantly saw the hurt on his face, as if my question and the tone of my voice came to surprise him. He wasn’t wearing his bucket hat nor the specs so every detail of his face was on display.

"I want us to talk and fix this Hae Won." He replied in a pleading and controlled voice.

"We already talked." I answered right away.

He didn't say anything for about a minute. I didn't as well or else I would already start making a fool of myself, breaking down in front of him when I was the one who initiated the break up.   
  
“No.” He muttered after taking a deep breath. “You talked. You didn’t even listen to me.” He said firmly. “I tried to talk to you. Called and texted you a hundred times but didn’t pick up nor read my messages. I called even during my concert. I tried to contact you every after performance. I was losing my mind. Manager Kang literally had to stop me from booking the next flight right after you broke up with me on the phone.”  
  
I continued to look ahead, avoiding his eyes because I was certain it would tear me apart if I did. 

"Why?" He asked, exasperatedly. 

"I already told you Baekhyun. I can't do this anymore." My voice just above a whisper.

"Why?" He asked once more. "I know you're lying."

"Baekhyun Please.” I told him. “Let's just be rational here, okay? You and I will never work out." I insisted, trying to conceal how I truly felt.

"No!" He contradicted in a firm voice. "We worked out. Everything was working out until you told me that it wouldn't anymore." He reasoned out vehemently.

"You call that working out?" I said, making an effort to sound strong and probably smug.

He looked slightly taken aback with my response. He turned to face me and I had full access to the pain that's written all over his face.

I couldn't take it anymore. Everything inside me ached upon seeing him this way. And the fact that I was the one causing him this made it worse.

"Were my efforts not enough?” He said. “Tell me…” He paused to wet his lips. “Because I can still do more. I can still…”  
  
“You know this is not about that.” I stated, cutting him.  
  
“Is this about Ara? The pictures?”

"No." I muttered trying to swallow the lump in my throat.

"No what?"

I remained quiet.  
  
"God, I'm losing my mind Hae Won!" He blurted out after letting out of a sigh.

"Baekhyun, just take me home." I said, ignoring his last question. “I already told you what I wanted to tell you.”

"No. No. No." He replied refusing my request. "We're not going anywhere unless we fix this. Until you tell me what do I have to do to make this right." He was practically begging as he reached for my hand. “I’m sure there’s something I can do. There’s gotta be something…”

"Baek, let's not make this any harder." I told him as I removed my hand away from his grip.

I even made a step back away him and he suddenly looked like he was about to lose it.

"Fuck!" He suddenly yelled and I almost jumped on my feet.  
  
He walked a few steps away from me and stayed on that spot for a few seconds. I watched him as his shoulders shake and his fingers rake his hair. I knew he was crying and he proved me right when he faced me once again. His eyes were wet with tears, he was even sniffling.  
  
 _Damn._ I hate seeing him cry.  
 _What am I doing?_

"Please don't do this to me Baby." This time, his voice was soft as he pleaded once more. “Just tell me what you want. Maybe you just need some time off, some space… I’ll give it to you. Just don’t…don’t do this.”

The sudden transformation of his tone was way too painful. Too painful, tears started to fill my eyes too.  _I couldn’t be this evil to hurt him this much._  
  
Then I remembered how I tried my hardest to endure the last couple of days trying to forget him, exerting effort to get rid of anything thing that reminded me of him. And now, seeing him now, in front of me, looking at me…pained and desperate. I could only cry… like what I had been exactly doing since I left Seoul.

I kept sobbing and wiping my tears repeatedly when I felt him near me and he hugged me. I wanted to hug him back so bad as I bury my face on his neck.

"Please let me go." I said in muffled voice, contrary to what I truly wanted. 

"No." He answered as I feel him shake his head, holding me even tighter. “I can’t.”

 _I was sure his refusal broke the tiniest part of me that was not broken yet._  
So, I used every ounce of energy I have left to push him away from me. Our eyes met when he was a foot away.

"Do you despise me this much now?" He smirked with an incredulous look on his face.

"I don't." I replied trying my best to steady my voice.

"Then why?!" He asked vehemently. "Why are you doing this to me? Why are you breaking up with me?"

"Because I can't lie to myself anymore!" I yelled finally letting my guard down.

"What?" His voice turned soft and raspy.

I looked at him intently.

"It's so hard.” I took a deep breath. “Everything is so hard for me Baekhyun! And I know that’s it’s hard for you too. I can't… I can’t keep pretending that everything is going to be fine. I can’t keep telling myself that I am good enough for you. I can't keep lying to myself believing that you and I have a chance." I paused and let out of a few sobs. "When I look at you, I feel guilty. I feel bad that you have to go through everything you have to because of me."

"What are you talking about Baby?" He stepped closer as he cup my face with his hands, his thumbs wiping my tears away.

However, I removed his hands.

 "You're Korea's Byun Baekhyun. You're way too famous for me. And sooner or later this will all come an end. We both know that." I explained as I watched him stare at me unbelievably. "You can’t fight them.”  
  
“No, I can win this.” He argued. “Just trust me.”  
   
“But at what cost?” I paused and let out of a few sobs. “It’ll cost you everything you worked hard for."

"I told you, I don't want anything but you." His response was quick. “Which part of it don’t you understand?”

"No Baekhyun. It's not me. You know it's not me." I shook my head sideways.

"Please, that’s not true. You know that. I love you." He said as he tried to hug me again but I stepped back, not letting him touch me.

His hands found their way to his head. He looked at me seeming to be contemplating on what he should do next. Then he tilted his head down. His both hands lay on his both sides.

I waited for him to say something.

“Just go to back to Seoul Baekhyun. Your company must be waiting for you. With all the mess right now, they need you to cooperate with them-”  
  
“I don’t fucking care about them!” He yelled. “They brought this to themselves. And honestly, at this point, I don’t care about any of this now except you.” He went on as he bore his eyes into mine. “You’re the only one I want and I don’t care how complicated it gets, I STILL WANT YOU.”  
  
The conviction in his voice struck me. I ended up biting my lower lip as I momentarily looked away.  
  
“Baekhyun, you don’t understand.”  
  
“I do. I totally get everything and I’m ready.”  
  
“No.” I protested, looking back at him. “Do you have any idea how people are going to think of you when those pictures come out with all this news about you and Ara?” I trailed off as I filled my lungs with air because I literally felt like hyperventilating. “You’re going to look like a bad person Baekhyun and I can’t let that happen. I can’t let you ruin everything you worked hard for just because of me.”  
  
“Just.” He emphasized. “Just because of you?” He smirked. “You probably know how much you mean to me right?”  
  
“I do…”  
  
He moved his head sideways. “If you do, then you would’ve understand why I’m willing to risk everything for you right now.”  
  
 _God, Baekhyun stop making this so hard for me._  
  
“You’re only saying it now. What about next month? Or the next year? The Next few years?” I struggled to say in between sobs. “I don’t want you to wake up one morning and regret about this. This is you Baekhyun. I can’t take you away from the people who helped you become who you are right now. I can’t take you away from your fans just like this.”  
  
“Damnit Park Hae Won!” He hissed. “Will you please stop thinking about other people right now and concentrate on us?” He took a deep breath. “Fucking please.”  
  
I bit my lower lip so hard, trying my best not to give up on my weakened knees.  
  
“I’m here and I’m practically begging you not to do this.” He added.  
  
We both held each other’s gaze, our eyes both wet from crying. I didn’t say anything. Afraid that I might just say what I truly wanted.  
  
“So, is this how you want it to be? You want me to have everything but lose you? Is that it?” He asked after a few silence.  
  
“Let’s just stop.” I said, in a perpetually tired voice. “At the end of the day, you’re the Byun Baekhyun of Korea. We were living in a daydream. I’m just fooling myself hoping we could get a happy ending.” I stated before I turned to walk back to his car.   
  
“Don’t decide for my life… or for what I want.” I heard him loudly, instantly making me stop on my feet.  “It’s you that I fucking want Hae Won. I love you.”  
  
I closed my eyes, trying to muster every courage I have left to face him once more. I met his eyes and held his gaze until I finally had to voice to verbalize my thoughts.  
  
“I don’t love you.”  
  
He smirked.  
  
“You expect me to believe that?”  
  
“No.” I replied. “I just need you to hear it.”  
  
He placed his hands on his waist, looking tired.  
  
“C’mon, you can’t do this to me again.”  
  
“I don’t love you Baekhyun.”  
  
“Fuck! Stop lying Park Hae Won.”  
  
“If you want me to stop, then let’s put an end to this once and for all."  
  
His eyes  pierced through mine.   
  
"Don't make me suffer anymore. I want my old life back." I added and it took every once of energy and courage I have to say it.   
  
 _I knew how my words would affect him._  
  
I saw how his jaw clenched, as he bit his lower lip, his eyes continue to bore into mine. He took a couple of deep breaths, brushing his hair away from his face with his fingers before tilting his head down.

"Is this what you really want?" He finally asked when he looked up to meet my eyes.  
  
His voice suddenly turned cold that it sent shivers down my spine.

I was surprised at how emotionless he suddenly sounded, I couldn’t think of a response.

"Is this what you fucking want!?"  
  
The coldness in his voice turned into rage, I flinched.  
  
“Yes.” I miraculously was able to reply.  
  
 _The biggest lie. Ever._

He sighed, his shoulders went limp as he tilted his head down again. His right hand rested on his waist he lifted the other one on his face to wipe his tears.  
  
My heart wanted to get out of my chest as I observed him. We remained silent for the next couple of minutes. He turned around and made a few steps away from me and stayed on the same spot before he started to walk back to his car without paying me a single glance.

"Let's go take you home." He said as he opened the door of the driver’s seat.  
  
I felt another tear escaped my eye as I forced myself to go back and get inside his car. He turned the engine on as soon I was able to sit next to him. I just sat there not knowing what to do with this given situation when I felt his hand in front of me as he reached for the seatbelt and wear it on me. His arm was brushed against mine and my hands formed into fist, stopping myself to hold him.  
  
None of us talked, the whole time. My stupid tears just wouldn’t stop, I kept my gaze outside the window steady. In fact, we were about to reach our shop at any moment and he never looked at me. He was very silent and I kept seeing his grip on the steering wheel tighten from time to time. I knew I don't have the right to feel this way after what I just did but he being this cold and indifferent was unbearable.  
  
He stopped his car right across the flower shop.

I slowly unbuckled the seatbelt, hesitant to even move.

"Baek-" I muttered and I didn’t really know what to say to him.

"Just go." He replied, his jaw clenching.

"I'm sorry..."

"Just leave." He replied briefly, his fixed eyes on the road.

I stared at him for a few moments knowing that it would be the last time I'd see him this way. I looked at his face forcing myself to memorize every detail.

I feel like everything inside of me was dying as I finally move to get out of the car. My heart was so heavy, I didn’t want to go.  
  
 _I didn’t want to leave him._    
  
The moment I closed the door, he didn't waste any time and drove away. I even heard the tires squeaking as he left. I turned to watch him leave. It was such a painful sight to behold.  
  
 _Oh. God._  
  
“I love you.” I muttered. “I love you. I love you. I love you.” I repeated over and over again as I bent my knees and covered my face with my hands.  
  
 _“I love you Baekhyun.”_  
  
The pain I felt right now was incomparable to all my previous hurts.  
It was like all the heartbreak I experienced in my life combined all together.  
  
 _No, it was even more than that._  
  
I didn’t care if someone saw me like this.  
I had nothing to lose anymore.

I will never forget this day.  
I will forever hate myself for this day.  
I will never forget the day…  
  
 _I pushed Byun Baekhyun away._

  
  
~♥~   
  
  
AN: I know this might me the most painful chapter ever because it is the most painful to write. I'm sending you virtual hugs. ♥


	34. Thirty Four

Thirty Four  
  
  
~♥~

_To say that I was heartbroken was an understatement._   
  


Two days.  
  
It’s been two days since I last saw and talked to Baekhyun. It’s been forty eight hours since I last left my room. I was devastated and I couldn’t remember if I stopped crying at all. I kept blaming myself for being a coward and for driving away the only person who did nothing else but proved how much he loved me.    
  
When I closed my eyes, I thought of nothing else but the way he looked at me the last time we were together. The pain across his face kept haunting me and the coldness in his voice when he told me to _just leave_ was still unbearable until now.  
  
 _Honestly, how am I supposed to forget everything now?  
Impossible. Just impossible._

  
***  
  
I was scheduled to go back to Australia in five days. My mom booked a ticket for me since I refused to even do anything but wallow in my misery. I was mourning as I felt everything inside me slowly die. Aunt Sunny and Jih Hye kept asking me if I was okay. And for one second, I thought I could lie and tell them I was but I just couldn’t even bring myself to lie about another thing anymore.  
  
 _I lied to Baekhyun._  
 _I lied when I told him that I didn’t want him to come looking for me anymore._  
 _I lied that this was what I wanted. I lied to him when I told him that I didn’t love him._  
  
I had to hold my chest when I called Eun Chan and told him about my break up with Baekhyun that same day, two days ago. I had to immediately make sure that he wouldn’t do anything to harm Baekhyun and his career. I was so mad at myself, I ended up playing Eun Chan’s game. He wasn’t that convinced at first but I told him that I was leaving for Australia soon.  
  
“Make sure you won’t change your mind Hae Won. Once you do, our deal is off.”  
  
I threw my phone right after the call ended.

 _I despise myself._  
  
  
***  
  
  
TUESDAY, four days before I leave Korea.  
  
11:37PM  
  
I heard my phone beeped. I didn’t know what I was expecting or who I was expecting to send me a message at this time but when I read the message, I couldn’t help but be surprised.  
  
 **010 **** ******  
 _Hae Won, this is Kyungsoo. Sorry but I’m outside your house right now. Is it okay if I ask you to come out?_  
  
My brain lagged for a couple of seconds processing the fact that Baekhyun’s best friend just sent me a message telling me that he was outside the house.  
  
 _Did something happen to Baekhyun?_  
My heartbeat raced, shaking my head to dismiss the thought right away.  
  
I didn’t reply, instead I got off the bed and reached for my overcoat since it was going to be really cold outside. When was out, I immediately saw Kyungsoo’s familiar black car under the dim light post across the street.  
  
 _What does he want?  
Why is he here?  
I’m pretty sure this has something to do with Baekhyun._  
  
I watched how Kyungsoo got out of the driver’s seat and walked towards me. He was wearing a cap and a dark colored overcoat, I couldn’t really distinguish. This was definitely not giving me a good feeling.  
  
“Kyungsoo.” I uttered when he stopped in front of me. “What brought you here?” I paused once more also trying to justify how he knew my place.  
  
He lifted a hand to his nape, looking unsure of what he was about to say.  
  
I was so tempted to ask about Baekhyun already.  
   
 _Is he okay?  
How is he taking everything?  
Is he eating well?  
Is he sleeping fine? _  
  
I had to literally bite my lip and take a deep breath just to stop myself.  
  
“He’s…” He paused to look at me for a moment. “He’s in the car.”  
  
I held my breath as my eyes darted to his car across the street.  
  
 _Oh my god._ The thought of Baekhyun being a few meters away from me sent shivers down my spine. I gulped, blinked my eyes a couple of times trying to rationalize what I just heard when Kyungsoo spoke again.  
  
“Drunk.”  
  
What he just said made me snap out of my thoughts. I looked unbelievably at him.  
 _Did he just say that Baekhyun was in the car, drunk?_  
  
“He…” I said in a slightly panicked voice. “He shouldn’t be here Kyungsoo.” I added, tilting my head sideways.  
  
“I can’t, I can’t see him.” I took a deep breath to somehow calm myself down.  
  
“He’s losing his mind.” Kyungsoo said, looking at me as if he meant every word. “He’s been asking me to take him here every time he’s drunk and by every time, I mean every night.”  
  
My fingers started to tremble, so I shoved my hands inside my pockets.  
  
 _He’s been drinking? Every night?_  
I blinked my eyes just to process this thought.  
  
“He’s not taking it easy Hae Won. It’s almost as if he’s punishing himself.”  He added, his voice filled with nothing but concern.  
  
 _Baekhyun. My heart couldn’t handle hearing this about him._  
  
“I’m sorry Kyungsoo…” I apologized. “Just take him home please.” I told him as I turned around to leave but stopped when I heard him again.  
  
“Wait.” Kyungsoo stopped me. “Your reason for breaking up with him is obvious to me Hae Won. You don’t have to pretend that you did it because it’s what you wanted.”  
  
 _I felt like crying again, all of a sudden._  
  
“I know you’re crazy about him too.”  
  
That familiar sinking feeling behind my chest resurfaced and I swear I could already feel tears forming in my eyes.  
  
“And I know I don’t have the right to talk you out of this but he’s my friend. He’s not himself. He’s devastated since you broke up with him. He’s been drowning himself in drinking and I’ve never seen him…like this before. Not even when he and Ara broke up.”  
  
Hearing this, _god it’s gripping my heart._  
I turned around to face Kyungsoo again, my eyes on his car.  
  
“He’s on TV trying his best to keep a straight face but later on knock on my apartment asking me if I wanted to drink with him.” He trailed off as he momentarily glanced at his car too. “He’d talk nonstop about you every time and he’d rant about how much it hurts and how much he misses you. He kept saying that he can’t let you go even if he tries.”  
  
I bit my lower lip, trying my hardest not to shed any tear.  
I couldn’t imagine what Baekhyun had to go through. He couldn’t even be seen in public like that. He had to conceal everything.  
  
“This isn’t easy for me too Kyungsoo.” I stopped, giving my lower lip a bite hoping I could still resist my tears. “It’s hurting me just as much to walk away but this is the best for him.” I reasoned out as I swallowed. “I can’t handle being with him while he loses something that’s special to him.”  
  
“He’s losing you too.” Kyungsoo said with conviction. “And I believe that it’s equally painful for him Hae Won. If not more.”  
  
 _I was speechless._  
  
“At this point, I’m pretty sure he made it clear to you that you’re the only thing that matters to him right now. So, losing you in the middle of all of this is absolutely beyond devastating for him. As I’ve told you before, Baekhyun is strong but it’s crystal clear that you’re his weakness.”  
  
 _I sobbed, momentarily unaware that I was already crying._  
  
“See, I’m not going to ask you to take him back if this is what you think and believe is right. If leaving him is the right thing for you to do. It’s your choice.” He told me. “But please. Just let him see you. I promise, I won’t let him talk me out of this again.”  
  
I heard Kyungsoo but I didn’t have the chance to reply anymore when I noticed Baekhyun already standing right next to the car across the street.  
  
***  
  
We were at the entrance of the town.

Baekhyun and I were a few feet away from the car where Kyungsoo remained. He had the headlights of the car turned on to give us a bit of light since it was dark around the area.

Baekhyun, obviously drunk stood about a couple of feet away from where I was. He was wearing a plain black shirt, jeans and sneakers, that’s it. No jacket, no cap. I instantly got worried since it was really cold. I was sure he’s going to catch a cold.  
  
 _But I guess, I didn’t have the right to worry about his health anymore._  
  
I bit my lip as I felt him stare at me. From where I was standing, I could somehow sense how heavy this was for him. He looked like he was hesitating to come near me for a second. This was the first time I ever saw him drunk and I didn’t know what to expect. I saw how he balled his hands into fists, the light from the car somehow revealing the veins in his arms as he was standing on the opposite side.  
  
Then, he made a step towards me.  
  
“Baby…” It was the first word that came out of his mouth.  
  
I suddenly felt like breaking down. _There was absolute longing in his voice._  
  
“God, I missed you.” He added as he made a few more steps towards me.  
  
He did it so fast and for some reason, I didn’t move to avoid him. He ended up pulling me into a bone crushing hug.  
  
“So bad.” He added, taking a deep breath, his arms tightening around me.    
  
He reeked of alcohol but it didn’t bother me as much because the familiar warmth brought by his body instantly made me want to succumb to my weakness. _I missed him so much. I missed being in arms like this. I missed hearing him breathe this close to me._  
  
“Come home to me, please.” His voice was just above a whisper. “I can’t do it without you.”  
  
I would. I wanted to come home to him. I’d do it in a heartbeat.  
 _If only things were different._  
  
Resisting to hug him back was beyond challenging but I didn’t have the right amount of bravery to push him away either, so I just let him hug me as long as he did.  
  
“I love you.” I heard him once more.  “I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you.”  
  
 _No words_. No words came out of my mouth.  
The voice in my head wanting to tell him how much I love him too was pushed back by my defences.  
  
He broke free of me when I remained silent. He was standing right in front of me and there was a look of disbelief on his face. He was trying to read me and I must have looked indifferent in his eyes. Not crying and just staring back at him right now.  
  
He looked a bit confused as he wet his lips before he spoke.  
  
“You’re really giving me up.” He stated without removing his eyes on me for a second, his voice controlled.  
  
He sounded like he just realized it. His grief stricken face was suddenly so unbearable to see.  
  
“Why…why won’t you fight for me?” He intercepted, sounding vulnerable again. “I thought you told me that we were in this together? Am I not worth a fight?” There was an evident hurt in his tone.

“I did it to save you.” For some miracle, I was finally able to find my voice.  
  
“Fuck!” He hissed. “I don’t need saving.”

Looking very mad, his angry eyes pierced through my soul.  
I shivered and it wasn’t because of the wind.  
  
“I only need you.” His voice went gentle suddenly as a soft expression on his face took over.  
  
Seeing him this drunk, I couldn’t help but be guilty. I was the one who caused him this.  
 _I am to blame for the misery in his eyes._  
  
But I knew that there was no turning back. I couldn’t take back everything I said. Not after the agreement I had with Eun Chan. I couldn’t be the cause of his downfall. So, with a brave face, I opened my mouth to utter words that would surely break him and make him give up on me for once.  
  
“I’m going back to Australia Baekhyun.” I gulped forcing myself to get the words out. “And I’m not coming back.”  
  
I swear, I saw him flinched as if what I just said physically hurt him.  
  
“I shouldn’t really have come here in the first place.” I gulped as something in me was trying to stop me from what I was about to say. “So, you’d better forget about me.” I told him, mustering every ounce of courage I have left to hold his gaze. “And I’m going to do the same thing. I’m going to forget you. Every single thing about you.”  
  
His mouth fell opened as he let out of smirk, looking at me like I just said the most absurd thing ever. Then, he bent his body, his hands resting on his knees. He shook his head sideways before he straightened his posture and looked at me again.  
  
“How could you be so cruel to me?” He asked, anguish evident both on his face and tone. “Tell me…what…what have I done to you for you to hurt me this much?” He trailed off as he lifted his hands on his head and walked a few steps away.  
  
When he walked back, his hands were still on his head, holding his hair away from his face as he looked unbelievably at me.  
  
“And how the fuck do you have the heart to tell me that you’re going to forget about every single thing about me?” The volume of his voice raised once more. “How do you have the strength to say that when I’m about to lose my shit because I can’t even get you off my mind for a second?!” He asked, almost breathless.  
  
I didn’t say anything as I was a bit shocked at how he looked so furious again right now. I had seen him angry a few times but this time it’s different. He was mad at me and this has never happened before.  
  
“How!?” He yelled and it scared the hell out of me.  
  
I looked at him but I still couldn’t reply.  
I could only swallow as I avoided his eyes for a moment as I felt my hands trembling.  
  
 _He was crying._  
He was absolutely crying when I turned to face him again.  
  
“Fuck, how am I going to forget you?” His voice was broken due to crying.  
  
His shoulders were shaking as he covered his eyes with his hand before wiping them.  
 _Oh my god, I’ve never seen him cry this hard before.  
This is excruciating. This is torture._  
  
“How could you make me love you this much when you’re leaving me anyway?”  
  
The way his eyes were piercing through mine right now sent shivers down my spine.  
  
“I’m sorry Baekhyun. I don’t have any choice.” I reasoned out, the best that my stupid brain could come up with right now.  
  
“No!” He yelled once more. “Of course you have a choice.” He answered and even in the dark, I could see tears streaming down his face. “You could’ve chosen to stay by my side and have me deal with the consequences that you’re so afraid to happen to me. I told you I was ready. I told you I could win this. I told you to trust me.”  
  
The way he firmly phrased his words, I knew he meant every bit of it.  
  
“I told you that I fucking love you more than anything.”  
  
 _Oh my god Baekhyun. Please stop._

“You could’ve chosen me.” He added as his shoulders slumped, sounding frustrated. “You could’ve chosen me.” He repeated before letting out of a deep breath.  
  
There was no use stopping myself from crying. I’d be a fool to believe that I could resist my stupid tears with this sight before my eyes.  
  
“I’m leaving Baekhyun.” I told him, ignoring the pain I felt behind my chest.  
  
 _I died inside._  
  
He gazed at me and it was clear how he winched as he heard me.  
  
“You’re really rubbing it on my face, huh?” He stated smugly. “So now tell me.” Sarcasm filled his tone. “Did you tell that son of a bitch that you broke up with me that’s why there are no traces of our photos anymore?”  
  
“Yes Baekhyun. I did.”  
  
“And what did he ask you in return? Did he ask you to be with him?”  
  
I took a deep breath, held my chin up as I answered him.  
  
“You shouldn’t care about what I do with my life anymore.”  
  
I admit, I was being mean and a total bitch towards him right now. But I just didn’t know what else to do to make him leave.  
  
“Fuck you!” He hissed. “Fuck you Park Hae Won!” He shouted, crying angrily. “How could you turn away from me… push me away and be with that monster?” He continued. “You know I’m the one you love.”  
  
“My love for you won’t do you any good Baekhyun.” I blinked, letting my silent tears roll down my cheeks.  
  
“Yes.” He uttered, nodding. “It won’t.” He surprisingly agreed, his breath ragged. “Because you know why?” He took a deep breath and he calmed down a bit afterwards. “Because it’s what you choose to believe. You chose to believe to that fucking idea instead of believing in us.”  
  
 _His words struck me like lightning._  
Maybe he’s right. In fact, he was right.  
  
He stood, right on the same spot, brushed his hair away from his eyes, wet his lips before wiping his tear stained face.  
  
I looked away, I couldn’t bring myself to watch him.  
Then I saw him walking towards me and he seemed like going back to the car. He was leaving, avoiding my eyes as he walked past me but then stopped when he was right behind me.  
  
“It’s funny how you told Ara that you’re not like her but you’re exactly doing the same thing by leaving me too.”  
  
 _Oh god._  
He said it in a way I just had to cry harder. I stood there letting my tears roll as I tried my best not keep my sobs as silent as possible. He was making me regret this so hard. _I hate him. I hate myself._  
  
“Hae Won.” It was Kyungsoo.  
  
It was as if I was immediately brought to the present. I wiped my tears using the back of my hand.  
  
“We’re taking you home.” He added.  
  
Taking a deep breath, I tried my best to compose myself as I turned around and walked towards the car. Kyungsoo was standing next to the door of the backseat waiting for me to get in. When I got inside, I caught a glimpse of Baekhyun on the driver’s seat. I didn’t expect that he was driving. _He was drunk and angry._ I shot a questioning stare at Kyungsoo, who was already looking at Baekhyun.  
  
“Are you sure you’re driving man?” Kyungsoo asked him. “You need to chill first.”  
  
He didn’t answer his friend, instead revved the engine on and met my eyes through the rear view mirror. _There was still a hint of anger in them._ We left the place as he worked with the steering wheel. He drove so fast, my heart was beating so fast the whole time.  
  
“Baekhyun, slow down. You’re gonna kill us all.” Kyungsoo told him.  
  
Baekhyun didn’t answer but continued to drive with the same speed. Kyungsoo turned to me and had probably seen how scared I was.  
  
“Byun Baekhyun!”  
  
Kyungsoo shouted but he remained deaf.  
  
“Damn it, you’re scaring her!”  
  
I closed my eyes as I heard the tires squeaked as we came to a sudden stop. I was shaking, my hands were, when I opened my eyes. When I turned to them, Baekhyun was already out of the driver’s seat and Kyungsoo was walking towards it. The door of the passenger’s seat remained opened as we waited for Baekhyun to come in. Kyungsoo was murmuring something I couldn’t really distinguish.  
  
When I looked outside, I saw him standing with his hands on his waist. I was pretty sure he was trying to calm himself down.  
  
 _This side of him scared me._  
  
When he finally walked towards the car, he only stopped to close the door of the passenger’s seat and walked towards the back seat. He opened the door and sat on the opposite side. My heartbeat grew wild behind my chest as he was with me.  I stared at him and he seemed to have calmed down somehow. He didn’t look at me nor pay me a single glance until Kyungsoo started the car.  
  
I couldn’t resist not paying attention to him. When I checked on him again, his attention was outside and he had his thumb between his teeth, his forehead creasing.  
  
 _He’s still mad._  
  
***  
  
When the car finally stopped in front of Auntie’s house. I saw how Baekhyun’s hand gripped his knee and I could only gulp and look away knowing how hard he’s trying to resist holding me. My throat suddenly ran dry and my legs immobile. _I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak._  
  
 _None of us spoke._  
  
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and forced my brain to function.  
  
“I...I’ll go ahead.” I said as I finally moved to open the door.  
  
Right when I was about to step out, I felt his hand on my own. He was holding it firmly, his eyes boring into mine when I turned to look at him. I couldn’t speak again. It was impossible to find the words with the way he’s staring at me right now. I waited for him to say something but he didn’t.  
  
Instead, I felt his hand slowly letting mine go.  
  
 _He was letting me go._  
  
I felt an intense pang in my heart. But why?  
 _I wanted him to let me go, right?_  
He just did.  
  
 _Why does it feel like my world just came crashing down on me?_  
  
***

THURSDAY

11:54AM  
  
I was in a hurry to leave Korea. I would die if I stay here a bit longer. This country‘s overtaken by Baekhyun. He’s everywhere and I’d definitely not survive in this environment.  
  
It was about lunch time when I heard Ji Hye and Aunt Sunny in the kitchen.  
  
“Eomma.” Ji Hye whined. “Can I please talk to Eonnie about this?”  
  
“Ji Hye. You are aware that your Eonnie is already having a hard time. You’re going to give her burden by talking to her about Baekhyun.”  
  
“I know but.” She took a deep breath. “But everyone’s getting worried already. I can’t even sleep well at night because I don’t know if Baekhyun Oppa is alright.”  
  
I suddenly became nervous.  
 _Did something happen bad to Baekhyun?_  
  
“I’m sure he’s fine Ji Hye.” Auntie told her. “You and your friends are just overthinking.”  
  
“But mom, he’s missed three guesting already. Baekhyun Oppa is not like this. His fans are all freaked out now, especially me.” She sounded like she was about to cry. “Especially when I knew what happened between him and Eonnie.”  
  
“Ji Hye.” Auntie held her daughter’s shoulders and pulled her into a hug. “People who just had their hearts broken often do stuff like this. Give him time. He’ll be back for sure. He’ll move on, he’ll be back once he forgets about Hae Won.”  
  
“But I don’t want him to forget Eonnie!” She reasoned out, crying this time. “I don’t want Eonnie to leave. I want them to be together. I want them to get married and have babies in the future. It’s okay if I don’t even get to watch his concerts anymore. As long as they get back together.” She paused as she was sobbing loudly. “I often hear Eonnie crying in her room and I feel so sad because I couldn’t do anything. I wanna ask her why they even broke up. I wanna know. Is it because of his fans? Because his fans liked Kim Ara more?”  
  
“Jih Hye…” Auntie caressed her daughter’s head gently.  
  
“Eonnie is better than Ara and I’m not saying this because she’s my cousin. She’s a wonderful person. She’s kind and beautiful. People will like her once they know about her.”  
  
“Shhhh…” Aunt Sunny hushed her as she faced him. “When you grow up, you’ll understand why your Eonnie had to leave Baekhyun. You’ll understand that sometimes you leave people behind not because you don’t love them… but because you’ll end up hurting each other if you stay.”  
  
Hearing Auntie, I stepped out in the open. She immediately saw me while she hugged the crying Ji Hye. I wanted to cry, my heart ached for Ji Hye. _My heart ached for everything._  
  
***  
FRIDAY  
  
7:16AM  
  
I woke up early and took a shower. There was no use sleeping since I couldn’t anyway. I planned to start packing today since I’d be leaving the next day. I kept myself busy but when I got out of the room, I saw Ji Hye standing in front of the TV. She was already in her school uniform and I was certain she was about to leave anytime. However, she continued to watch what was on TV, unbothered by my presence. I couldn’t hear what was on, but it was definitely a morning news. My heart beat fast as I saw her gasped, her hands on her mouth.  
  
“What’s wrong Ji Hye?” I asked as I immediately walked towards her.  
  
She didn’t answer and asked me to look at the TV instead.  
  
 _“After this video of Baekhyun taken from his recent Japan concert where he was seen playing the piano passionately while crying had gone viral, his fans got more worried when he missed a few of his TV guesting. People speculate that he is not okay and is going through a hard time.”_  
  
The viral video of him playing the piano was flashed on the screen. Seeing it for the first time, I held my breath watching him play. It was definitely a sad melody, later intensifying and he started to cry. His tears were visibly seen on the video.  
  
 _Oh my god._ No.

 _“Earlier this morning, another video of Baekhyun started circulating on the internet.”_  
  
Another video was flashed on the screen. It wasn’t clear but I knew it was Baekhyun. He was getting out of the bar and by the looks of it, he was drunk. He was wearing jeans, jacket and a cap. He was a few feet away from the entrance when a man ran for him and pulled and punched him right away. Baekhyun landed on the ground.  
  
I gasped.  
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  
  
The man kicked him a couple of times, not allowing him to get on his knees. I suddenly felt confused because Baekhyun didn’t seem to make an effort to fight back. When he was finally able to get up, another man showed up and attempted to hit him too, if not for someone who ran towards them to stop them.  
  
 _Mr. Yoo._ I recognized him right away. He stop the men but my eyes remained on Baekhyun who just stood behind his security.  
  
 _What was up with him?_  
  
My brain stopped working. I stepped away from the television not being able to stand what the news have to say about it. I turned around wanting to go back to my room when Ji Hye called me.  
  
“Eonnie…”  
  
I stopped but didn’t turn around to face her.  
  
“Eonnie.” She called once more and in just a matter of time she was already right behind me, hugging me. “I’m so worried about Oppa.”  
  
I didn’t know what to tell her. I felt my hands shaking on my sides while I try to process what I just saw. Kyungsoo was right.

 _This wasn’t Baekhyun anymore._  
  
***  
  
I was going to lose my mind if I didn’t do anything. I walked back and forth inside my room. I kept fidgeting, thinking about that video of Baekhyun.  
  
 _Oh god. Oh god. Oh god._  
  
I knew Baekhyun could fight. He could easily kick people’s ass if he wanted. But he didn’t do anything on the video. _It was almost as if he was letting them beat him._  
  
I sat on the chair in front of my vanity table, my phone in front of me. I was trying my hardest to resist the urge to call him. _No, I can’t just call him like this. He hates me. That, I knew for sure._

But I couldn’t stay still, so I ended up calling Kyungsoo instead. My heart beat was racing while I wait for him to pick up. When he finally did, I held my breath.  
  
“Hae Won.”  
  
“Kyungsoo…” I hesitated. “I…” I trailed off not knowing how to start the conversation. “I saw the news. How is he?”  
  
I didn’t hear any reply.  
  
“I’m sorry to bother you, I just, I just need to know that he’s fine.”  
  
The silence went on and I suddenly regretted calling.  
 _What was I thinking?_  
  
“You know what, I… Uhm, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have bothered you. I shouldn’t have called-”  
  
“I think it’s best if you check on him personally. He’s in my apartment. I’ll text you the address.”

I put my phone down on the table once more right after the call ended. I wasn’t certain if I did the right thing. I knew I would regret this.

 _Later._  
  
***

1:02PM  
  
Kyungsoo opened the door for me and as I got in, I couldn’t help but be nervous. He told me that Baekhyun was in the living room and he was going to leave us alone. I wanted to protest, not wanting him to leave because I neither know what to say nor how to face Baekhyun alone.  
  
“He’s been hard on everyone and even on himself. Just manage your expectations.” He told me before he got out.  
  
Without having any choice but to get inside alone, I slipped on some slippers. I was so tensed, gripping the handle of my bag tightly as I walked towards the living room. Kyungsoo’s apartment was spacious with grey, black and white as the dominant colors. I immediately located the living room and found Baekhyun siting on the couch. He hand his eyes closed, he must be sleeping. He was wearing a black long sleeved top, accented by a silver necklace and his rolex watch, with a pair of blue jeans and sneakers.  
  
Watching him, I stood there unmoving. I saw a dark bruise right in the left corner of his mouth. There was also a small bandage above his right eye.  
  
 _It hurt seeing him bruised._  
  
I could still remember the last time we talked and I was pretty sure he won’t be so happy to see me here. My body stiffened when he finally moved. He lifted a hand to his nape, flinching as he brought his hand to his sides. It must be where he got kicked.

The moment he opened his eyes, he immediately saw me. His forehead creased right away, his brows furrowed. We held each other’s gaze for a couple of seconds before I hear him speak.    
  
“Why is she here Soo?” He asked but no answer came of course.  
  
He stood up and walked around the house, probably looking for his friend. When he couldn’t find him, he went back to the living room, right at the exact same spot.  
  
“What are you doing here?” He asked, annoyed. “How did you get Kyungsoo to agree with this?”  
  
 _He’s cold. His stares were._  
  
“W-what happened to your face?” I asked, stuttering.  
  
He smirked.  
  
“Stop acting like you don’t know yet, will you? It’s all over the news right?” He answered smugly.  
  
I didn’t know where I got the courage but I made a few steps towards him to give him a closer look. The bandage right about his eye was about an inch and there was another bruise on his right cheek. I also noticed his already visible stubbles, his hair messy.  
  
“Baek, please take care of yourself.” I said, unable to hide concern in my tone before I was able to stop myself.  
  
I watched how his eyes widened.  
  
“What?” He snapped. “Wait.” He paused to look at me intently. “What are you doing here by the way? And what is it to you?”  
  
I bit my lower lip, hoping I could hold back my tears. _How and what he just said hurt. But he was right. I knew fully well that I shouldn’t be here._  
  
“Just leave me alone.” He snapped once more, his tone as expressionless and his face.  
  
I didn’t move a muscle. My knees were starting to get weak. I couldn’t almost recognize the person in front of me right now. His aura has totally changed. _No more warmth, just pure cold._  
  
“Or maybe I should just do it.” He added impatiently as he turned around.  
  
He must have been looking for his jacket as he back and forth in front of me.  
  
“Baekhyun please…” I muttered though I didn’t really know what I was going to tell him.  
  
He stopped what he was doing and glared at me, eyebrows furrowed.  
  
“Why the fuck are you here Park Hae Won?” He asked once more in a very controlled voice, his jaw clenching.  
  
His language shocked me, I was speechless for a few seconds. I even had to momentarily look away to muster enough courage to reply.  
  
“I heard you didn’t show up on some of your guesting-”  
  
He smirked, tilting his head sideways, already holding his jacket.  
  
“So that’s it?” He asked sarcastically. “You came here to sermon me about my job?” He let out of a soft laugh. “You too? Are you my manager now? Or my new publisher? Are you one of them now?!”  
  
I just continued to look to him, still too stunned of how changed of a person he was already.  
  
“You really care about it, don’t you?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “About me making other people happy but not myself.”  
  
I instantly knew what he was trying to point out. And it hurt how he’s getting the wrong idea for what I did. Though, I must admit that I couldn’t blame him. What I did was harsh, leaving him for something I thought that would be better for him. I’d never expect him to understand.  
  
“Well guess what, it’s my life. I decide what to do with it and if I mess it up, you don’t fucking care.” He said, emphasizing his last word.  
  
“Baek…” I gulped, shivering under his gaze. “I know I’ve hurt you but you know it was the right thing to do…”  
  
He let out of a sarcastic laugh.  
  
“And since when did breaking my heart become the right thing to do?” He said, his eyes boring into mine. “Did you mean the easiest?”  
  
 _Easiest.  
My god Baekhyun, breaking your heart, not to mention mine too was something you can never call easy. _I wanted to tell him and protest but I was too dumbfounded.  
  
When I didn’t answer, he started to walk past me, but my hands, having a mind of their own, grabbed him by the wrist. I shouldn’t have done it, I knew fully well but my emotions were taking over my rationality as of the moment.  
  
His attention landed on my hands holding his wrist before he looked up and stared at me with piercing eyes. It was crystal ice, the look he was giving me now, I shivered. And it hurt, the thought of him treating me this way, hurt.  
  
 _I knew I didn’t have the right to complain._  
  
Giving up, I looked down as I slowly let go of his arm. I immediately heard him took a deep breath, his hands formed into fists.  
  
“Why are you here?” He asked for the third time.  
  
 _What do I say? I can’t tell him that I’m here because I’m worried about him. I couldn’t tell him that I still care._  
  
“Shouldn’t you be in Australia by now?” He asked once more, no sort of affection in his tone. “Why are you still here? And I’m sorry but didn’t you tell me that I shouldn’t care about what you do with your life anymore? Shouldn’t you be doing the same thing?”  
  
I might look dumb right now, not being able to answer a simple question. My heart was aching, the sinking feeling was taking over me. I wanted to hold my chest but I didn’t want him to see me like this.  
 _God, I wanted to just step closer and hug him so tight and ask for forgiveness._  
  
“You left me because of it, right?” I heard him say, snapping me out of my thoughts. “Because of my career?”  
  
I was hearing him but I couldn’t fully process what his words. My brain was busy trying to tell me to breathe properly.  
  
“Tell me, why would I continue to do something that caused me to lose the very thing I care the most?”  
  
I stopped. I stopped whatever it was that I was thinking. Held my breath as I slowly looked up to meet his eyes. I saw anguish, frustration and anger in them.  
  
Tears started to pool in my eyes.  
I was about to embarrass myself again by crying so when a tear escaped my eye, I immediately looked away, wiping my cheek.  
  
I heard his heavy breathing in front of me.  
  
“Please don’t do this.” I muttered, my voice just above a whisper.  
  
“Damn it!” He hissed, startling me.  
  
I turned to face him once more, his jaw clenching.  
  
“Don’t ask me to do something if you’re leaving me anyway. And if you’re still leaving, do it now. Don’t give me hope by showing up here, standing in front of me like this when you know how much I want to crush your lips with my own.” He paused to swallow and momentarily looked away.  
  
“Don’t make me suffer more by seeing you and not being able to touch you.” He added, emphasizing his words.  
  
 _I froze._  
  
Then I saw him start to walk towards the door. My thoughts were a mess. I was rattling inside but couldn’t really bring my body to do something. My feet remained glued on the exact same spot. And when I finally had the right body coordination to turn around, he was already right behind the door. I watched him paused and just stood there for a couple of seconds before turning around. We immediately locked eyes. My hands trembled as I tried my hardest not to look away.  
  
“Fuck this.” He hissed as he started to walk back towards me.  
  
His steps were fast but watching him come near me now, everything seemed to be in slow motion. The wild beating behind my chest drowning out every form of sound I was hearing including his footsteps. When he was finally right in front of me, he immediately pulled me against him, held my head with his hands before claiming my mouth. I dropped my bag on the floor.  
  
 _He was angry._  
  
I could tell by how aggressive his kiss was. I couldn’t process what was happening. I didn’t even have the right mind to protest when I felt his hands went down to my arm as he pushed me against the wall. My back kind of hurt at the contact, I even thought my head hitting the wall but his hand was fast to hold me.  
  
His lips were insistent and punishing but I could also feel the longing in them. I wasn’t kissing him back. I wanted him to stop because it hurt, his grip on my arms hurt, my heart hurt. He continued to kiss me for the next couple of seconds before he detached his lips from mine only to land on my neck the next moment after titling my head to one side.  
  
I could only bite my lip, I wanted to push him away but I was too scared. I started to cry. I couldn’t think.  
  
 _Baekhyun please stop._ _Please._  
  
Then, I felt his hands ripping my light blue, button down, long sleeved top, a couple of buttons falling on the floor, immediately revealing my bra.  
  
I gasped, totally taken aback by what he just did. He paid me a furious but desired filled look before I felt his mouth on my neck once more, his teeth grazing my skin down.   
  
I swear, my hands were already trembling, my tears streaming down my face, my legs weakening. I felt so hopeless, I certainly don’t have the strength and the courage to stop him.  
  
 _But he did._  
  
He stopped all of a sudden. He slowly lifted his face to look at me. The furious look on his face instantly changed to something else. He suddenly looked afflicted and apologetic. His attention fell on my ripped top then his grip on my arm loosened before he let me go as if realizing what he just did.  
  
He made a step back, shut his eyes closed for a few seconds. When he looked at me once more, he opened his mouth to say something but no words came out. He brought a hand to rake his hair with his fingers.  
  
Filling his lungs with air, he stared at me and for one moment I saw how regret took over his face.  
  
 _I could only cry._  
I was too overwhelmed to even say a single word.  
  
I felt him step closer and I held my breath when I felt his hands trying to straighten my top, his hands trembling a bit as he did it.  
  
He made a step back once more, turned around to pick his jacket on the floor and draped it around my shoulder. One moment later, he was so close to me again, his forehead against mine.  
  
“I shouldn’t have…” He swallowed. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”  
  
 _Baekhyun.  
God, I missed you. _  
  
The moment he stepped away, I immediately felt so incomplete. We held each other’s gaze and I swear I was so ready to just collapse in his arms.  
  
 _I wanted him to just hold me and tell him that it’s okay. That I understood._  
  
“I’m sorry.” His voice was above a whisper, there was utmost sincerity in the say he said it.

That was the last time thing I heard from him aside from his footsteps, walking away from me. Then the closing of the door followed.  
  
The sound of the door closing, _almost signifying something else being closed._  
  
I fell on the floor crying. I’ve had my heart broken so many times in the last few days but this time it was different. This was the most painful, the most unbearable.  
  
I bawled, crying my heart out.

I knew, deep down in my heart, that there was _no more waiting.  
No more begging to stay.  
No more apologizing. _  
_It was the last time I was going to see Baekhyun in Korea._  
  
  
 _To say that I was heartbroken is an understatement._  
  
  
  
~♥~  
  
  
 _AN: Hey Loves I know. The angst. The last three chapters. This cold post break up Baekhyun is just, I wanted to give you guys a glipmse of his POV so this whole chapter happened.  
Btw, this story is about 40 chapters. Just wanted you to prepare your hearts. We still have 6 more chapters to go. I hope you anticipate what's about to happen next. _  
  
PS. Thanks for waiting as always, strawberries. ♥


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